House MD - Funny Moments: Season 5 (HD)

Some of the funnier moments from House M.D. I believe I captured most of them although some were purposefully omitted.
This content is not mine. All content is the property of NBC Universal.

[@RuralTowner]

"I just went to my happy place." "We cannot let House anywhere near this woman."

[@HK556]

That slow look upwards before the delivery really sells the line.

[@deidaratsuchikage289]

RuralTowner What chapter is that one????

[@yasharmj1717]

I don't get it

[@RuralTowner]

@@deidaratsuchikage289 No idea. Only quoted lines from this clip.

[@Aaronmajowskavitz]

@@yasharmj1717 its because house could act reckless and get away with alot if the patient didnt care

[@camilleolson9887]

"I'm sorry but I'm going through a tunnel, in a canyon, on an airplane, while hanging up the phone." *I love this show! 😁*

[@user-dk9qu8ys4d]

That is not the actual quote.

[@Robbie32]

Close enough.

[@AltFnF4]

“If your gonna kill me and rape me, please do it in that order”

[@marcoliver7914]

Funniest house quote I've heard.

[@AshutoshPandeyDrumBeat]

@@AltFnF4 à

[@sariadrawzthingz4529]

House: *realizes he's about to blow up* House: huh...

[@vrass775]

That's what we call an oh crap moment.

[@melosan5868]

Which ep is that one?

[@UnhingedJesterGaming]

It's kind of a "welp!" moment considering he didn't anticipate it and when he did notice he was like "nothing I can really do at this point..."

[@House_MAL]

Did he die or no

[@LuxiChara]

@@melosan5868 some random episode I believe, it's just a dream anyway so good luck finding it

[@analisantos3207]

Taub's impression of Foreman is priceless 😂😂😂

[@DMoney011]

😂😂it’s spot on Foreman always had the same expression no matter what the situation was

[@WouldntULikeToKnow.]

😐

[@jacobocto1422]

"Do I look like an idiot?" *Visible Restraint*

[@mackay10]

I will never get sick of the “Fight the Power” scene...😂

[@benwu7980]

It's so cleverly done with the background staff and passing people, just little reactions and move along with whatever doing.

[@kathykirkland7079]

@@benwu7980 lpp0

[@charlesharrison4077]

I was over it 6 seconds in

[@carolina.darling]

‘was thinking about huge throbbing di...agnostic skills‘ Laughed soooo hard

[@ivydex3073]

Carolina So...ahhh!

[@laurie150]

Best line! And the way he said it. Lol 😆

[@nonexistentaspen]

My mouth genuinely dropped hearing that

[@Xylarxcode]

The inhalor one was my favorite. House's face was like: Oh, I'm gonna enjoy this next moment sooo much.

[@Lightblinder]

or also "come on, you're making it too easy"

[@MrVauxs]

"are you being serious? this is ludicrous AND ridiculus!"

[@kommo1]

There is so much beauty in this world.

[@amitir22]

i think he just thought to himself: i remembered why i live for

[@klklkl427586]

@@kommo1 Kirito?

[@827Drew]

'She might be armed, I'd have her deliver it shirtless.' My god, I miss this show.

[@flickcentergaming680]

"Bubbles." "Is that your new stripper name?" "Yes."

[@SomeoneElse-]

"Holding things in can give you cancer!" Yeah, about that.......

[@beastmasterbg]

Appolo lel

[@jmsg_PR]

Foreshadowing

[@EPrimeify]

What? I don't ge---OOOOOhh, dude.

[@Volcanflame]

and also, "No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die"

[@tylerv5413]

😩😭

[@petitebaje]

The inhaler scene gets me every time, House's face. :'D

[@hollyb6885]

I loved how, at the end of the scene, the lady leaves the exam room and says, “JERK”. Cuddy asks House what that was about and he says, “Jamaican chicken recipe “. 😂😂

[@georgerogers2120]

"Was it Taub?" "I'll never tell. But, yes."

[@zwarteschim]

Love Cuddy😂

[@devourerofnuggets]

"I think my penis stopped breathing... Do you know CPR?" That has gotta be the best pick-up line ever.

[@citlalialejandraguevara6526]

Which episode was that?

[@DoubleUProds]

Careful Penile Resuscitation?

[@aronnemcsik]

I am pretty sure he reused this line when they were making out and got a diffrent answer ;)

[@reznof2011]

rapu jfjfhdhdhn

[@roxanajohnson2789]

"we cannot let House anywhere near this woman" lol

[@professorjamesmoriarty5191]

That's one of the best.

[@lors8400]

I need to know which episode this was again. O wanna rewatch it

[@tylerv5413]

With Felicia Day?

[@speedshot6565]

Roxana Johnson lol I think the ep. is called “Big Baby”

[@matthewrowley813]

"No one can stop me from being premature." Best quote.

[@KitsunenoHibi]

XD Hey, at least the whole "fight the power" incident made the patient smile. House patients never have much to smile about, so giving that young man a grin is a good deed!

[@alanwatts5823]

Well the boombox gave new symptom (he wasn't feeling vibration in His hands)

[@thatgrumpychick4928]

4:04 We can't let house anywhere near this woman

[@ytw101]

4 seconds off

[@tiffanypersaud3518]

6:09 This show is subtlety genius. The patient was dead and loved how House communicated with the vibrations of the loud music. Needless to say whenever House visits a patient, which is rare, he is always diagnosing. Pissing others off in the process, win-win. “Fight the power!”

[@alanb8884]

You might want to edit 'dead' to 'deaf'

[@jonnysupreme]

💀 😅

[@Anthroparian]

Bitch was dead????

[@icybear1234]

omg that guy with a broken finger, that scene is as funny as lady with an inhaler

[@observer698]

I didn't get the part until I read the broken finger comment :D

[@hemanthchukku]

Here's my impression of foreman on happiest day of his life 😡 And here's the saddest day of his life 😡

[@nathanrees4855]

I think it was more 😐

[@jimcanterak7349]

"Keeping things in can give you cancer!" 3 seasons later...

[@jmsg_PR]

Jim Canterak Oh the irony

[@quoniam426]

I hope he regreted that joke...

[@majinnemesis]

Quo Niam no he probably went "see i was right holding things can give you cancer"

[@QixTheDS]

Wrong quote

[@nileman9907]

Too soon!

[@imworm8695]

"If I get drunk there's a chance I'll makeout with the strippers or become one"

[@Gulliolm]

Sold!

[@videocommets]

@@Gulliolm Okay.

[@thatgrumpychick4928]

Show me how the inhaler works *does it stupidly* House is thinking oh I'm going to have fun with this

[@jaymer123]

deekat3279 how about you learn that pentagrams aren’t necessarily associated with Satanism and leave the person alone? The comment was made a year ago after all.

[@jaymer123]

deekat3279 wow I don’t respond to you and you decide to be an ass! Also you changed the subject. All I was saying was the pentacle or pentagram is not associated specifically with Satanism. Also if you actually look up the beliefs of Satanism it’s more about putting yourself before others and taking care of yourself. It’s not as evil as most people think. I’m not a satanist hell I’m an atheist but maybe you should do your research.

[@tylerv5413]

deekat3279 Pentacles are the symbol in any orientation, pentagrams are physical objects with pentacles on them such as pendants, coasters, etc. And your comments were fairly condescending; that’s not what most spiritual people consider good karma/whichever terminology you choose. “An harm ye none” is when people are affected negatively, not whether you think they should feel harmed or not.

[@steztoyz]

"She sends one of yours to the hospital, send one of hers to the morgue." ...Laurie did a perfect Sean Connery. 🤣

[@hybr1d21]

2:58 their fearful screams is absolutely hilarious

[@tebellontsebeng4024]

Juuzou Suzuya lol this kills me all the time

[@tylerv5413]

ZOMBIE lol

[@tjjordan4207]

It would even more hilarious if they pulled an Alien moment with them (points to anyone who gets the joke/old reference).

[@Captn_Slow]

"Seizure, death or worse" "Double death?"

[@judekanawati7467]

Because you’re Batman?

[@MiladyRevan]

Or worse! Expellllllllled!

[@moreblack]

2:10 "Holding things in can give you cancer!" Ouch, poor Wilson.

[@jaynerobinson5721]

House: Just say you're a middle-aged Chinese woman. Wilson: Fine House: Say it. Wilson: I'm a middle-aged Chinese woman. lol

[@joao94vieira]

"Taub. Another graduate of the House school of being a dick" I just love that delivery

[@georgexatz4162]

House had the happiest face ever after that lady uses her inhaler

[@GabrielleHayes1921]

Remy/13 is so awesome. I love how she just throws shit right back at House without a second thought, I love her so much lol

[@aritragupta4182]

Treatment by 'fighting the power'...wish I had a doctor like House

[@WeaponLight]

Aritra Gupta he would kill u moron

[@denisethasder8193]

WeaponLight Doctor house was the country's best diagnostician in the show, how is he that bad?

[@davidturner6280]

can you tell me which episode is that one?

[@yt-sh]

House is not practically applicable as most of Diagnosis he makes at end can be sorted if he starts it off like what any Med school follows...

[@venusmoondust]

the lady and the inhaler. always a classic

[@827Drew]

She uses it like she's putting on perfume. :D

[@jibblesq]

4:12 "Nobody can stop me from being premature." That little laugh shit after just about killed me.

[@lemonnitrate3050]

“Holding things in can give you cancer!” Aged WONDERFULLY

[@EdsterIII]

I love how Thirteen doesn't bother to play games. She just goes with it basically telling him shut up dumbass let's work. Olivia Wlide is just that Wild.

[@bridget3956]

"She looks pretty good for someone on roofies"

[@sandcoffin2657]

My only criticism of this video is that it needs more Kutner.

[@warpspeedchic6932]

we all needed more Kutner

[@gillianlefrancois9394]

I just saw Kal Penn in a new series on Netflix, he's really good

[@warpspeedchic6932]

Gillian Lefrancois what's he in?

[@amun1040]

@FullmetalandtheFlame Yes, it was his decision to leave, he was offered a job in the white house. Really not a tv show, the real white house public relations' team.

[@sparkynicole3941]

4:30 that moment when House actually looks sad and chastised Is... it’s, it’s beautiful

[@balalaika1233]

6:36 even Foreman winked when he heard that 😂 Can't blame the guy, Olivia Wilde is a beauty

[@anthonydooleyii7678]

The wink was so subtle but perfectly timed.

[@mattsmith235]

6:04 best bit in all of houses funny moments

[@tebellontsebeng4024]

matt smith dance moves🤣🤣🤣

[@wakeruncollapse]

5:38 is absolutely vicious and I love it.

[@Lia-wi4bc]

Woman sprays inhaler on her neck. House: I am about to end this woman’s career

[@samuelblackmon493]

She left the exam room saying jerk and when Cuddy asked why, House said they were discussing Chicken recipes

[@thatgrumpychick4928]

3:00 will always be my favourite part of the whole season

[@lukahikano3004]

i love how at first everyone was like omg house you cant do that then by season 5 everyone's joining in

[@ismok3dopelik3kidcudi]

"In florida they said: Jesus is on my cheese sandwich."

[@theeorangeofthyorangetree]

3:52 oh my god his face suits my life...

[@j.peterse8106]

people who don't know thirteen is a person are going to get do confused by this comment section

[@gabicastle9217]

Peteto Chibs eleven's sister

[@benjaminprins9621]

She’s a person, a very VERY attractive person.

[@Duckaluckatape]

I love thirteen

[@Sai4651]

5:52 - House's response always gets me 🤣 He was ready to feed these cancer research mice to a cat.

[@GRDwashere]

'speculation makes a spec out of u and some guy named lation... which doesn't affect me at all' ...I'm sooo using that at work.

[@ThatGuy_212]

When you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME. Assume.

[@observer698]

@@ThatGuy_212 I think this was better than the speculation

[@marcoliver7914]

7:00 "You see the problem with speculation is you make a spec out of you and some guy named lation, which really doesn't affect me at all"

[@nasrinv]

Taub is so underrated and Olivia Wilde is a Goddess ❤️

[@selenan4140]

We cannot let house anywhere near this woman

[@paranoidandroid6095]

4:55 One of the best moments in the show

[@serotonin9218]

“The struggle to resistance ones captures is never pointless. Vive la résistance!” 😂

[@davidoncioiu3595]

6:37 Yes, please

[@perpetus2514]

David Oncioiu what episode

[@callmecanis7344]

1:48 Moments from death, and Houses last words of choice: *Huh*

[@nunyabusiness7824]

what episode is it?

[@saitamaonepuuunch6883]

That looks when she shows him how to inhaler works in priceless lmao! OMG i'm dying !!! 03:50

[@falke_blade9341]

2:43 he sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue! That's the Chicago way love that quote from The untouchables by sean connery

[@louff4tw746]

“Holding things in can give you cancer” He predicted it

[@abb5596]

2:41 is the best Sean connery impression I've heard

[@augusthawks6576]

03:37 "Do I look like an idiot?" I laugh every time I see that. The one with the jelly cracks me up, too.

[@kevinboudreaux7860]

"House! what are you doing?" "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm fighting the power!"

[@electronicsandroboticsclub750]

"If you're gonna kill me and rape me, please do it in that order" my sides hurt🤣

[@evilmorty-tv1xs]

R.I.P Kutner

[@yardbarr]

olivia wild is the most beautiful woman on earth mate.

[@nightwolfjr.6184]

Sold

[@Scoreman7769]

I prefer what's her name from the prison during the last season

not without make up

[@siemniak]

@@Scoreman7769 Adams way hotter and Dominica too

[@dylantruong897]

@@siemniak yupp

[@RedHall]

Woman: Do I look like an idiot? House: No. Would you show me how your inhaler works Woman uses her inhaler like perfume Me facepalms

[@turbonutterbastard69]

I like Thirteen more as "Bubbles".

[@world.enterprises1225]

6:48 Tiny Wilson

[@mitchelnorton2692]

That scene where House had the boom box playing" Fight The Power" never gets old.

[@picantchew2633]

3:36-3:54 I've been searching that scene for soo longg

[@wildcardedits]

pi can't chew me too and army 💪 lmao

[@gem_bob95]

I can’t get over that inhaler woman! I’ve heard stories that actually happens 😂

[@PhantomFan1a]

Love the part where he is shouting at Cuddy 'Have you seen my balls?' Although I am surprised one of them wasn't blue because that would have made the joke that much funnier :D

[@gauravsherke4127]

That comeback though 3:14😂😂 His comeback

[@carlosconde6512]

3:50 the look on his face says so much

[@tonycadenas7059]

I love thirteen.❤️ she is one of the most beautiful Doctor's on the show.❤️ She's one of my favorite characters too.

[@quoniam426]

Not only beautiful but also witty enough to awnser a troll joke with another one without even giving a shit about what people might think of her.

[@listrahtes]

A stark contrast to the beauty prison doc in the last season which was basically a nice face with zero charisma.

[@ytw101]

4:01 the look sold me so good

[@goth9ever]

That fight the power bit made me fucking LOL nonestop!

[@dxrebel]

Love how 13 usually fires right back

[@suhassubbanna]

6:16, he looks like walmart version of Matt Damon

[@bigtub1101]

“She looks pretty good for someone on roofies” Brooooooo

[@bkurtz8770]

Dr Park and Dr Masters prettiest Drs on the show

[@BTZR]

Yes they are very cute and nice

[@annheaton2243]

Of the first five seasons, this was the best. Some stunning epsiodes.

[@JuanPabloContrerasC]

3:20 "when are YOU taking vacations 1313" XD the look on Olivia xD

[@investigate3_11]

My feelings towards Thirteen are ambivalent.

[@TrainHunter94YT]

House: *turns stove on and gas hisses* House: "Huh." *BOOM* Edit: "Worst? Double death". Rumor has it 2 negatives equal 1 positive.

[@loriwalters1437]

I love this collection of seasonal funniest moments

[@txominabel6353]

I just went to my happy place We can not let house anywhere near this woman Kills me every time 😹😹😹😹

[@spikegilfer1997]

6:43 Foreman's fucking wink

[@hateefull1399]

I love how House was like huh facing that he could almost die lmao

[@kiarialuna912]

My favorite was "Fight the Power"

[@Broski8137]

2:10 Wow that line hurts

[@steztoyz]

@2:43 A nearly perfect Sean Connery in the Untouchables.

[@scenicpseudo3012]

- death, or worse - worse ? dooble death ? 🤣

[@R1E4_M]

3:35 one of the best moment of the show

[@tylerv5413]

That House keeps a straight face at all is a testament to Laurie’s acting skills

[@TheKronos789]

You missed one good scene from The Social Contract where a patient couldn't stop himself from telling Cuddy how sexy he though she was.

[@HerkulesRS]

the Sean Connery imitation was spot on lol

[@cameronsadam]

i love wilson sm and how much he puts up with Houses bullshit

[@magmat0585]

loved the Untouchables quote