"I hate how I look." dude, no. (why you suck at body confidence & how to start having it)

Oof, this one was pretty intimidating to film. There are a lot of layers to what I've been dealing with privately, but I'm finally in a place to begin to share it here. I hope that this video is able to comfort someone out there! You're beautiful & progress is NOT linear, so be kind to yourself. THAT IS AN ORDER.
insta → / kaitiyoo
CONTACT
insta → / kaitiyoo
tiktok → / kootooyoo (@kootooyoo)
twitch → / kaitiyoo​​​
discord → / discord
spotify → open.spotify.com/user/1217086... (Kaiti Yoo)
pinterest → / ​​​
goodreads → / kaitiyoo
tumblr → asiiana.tumblr.com/​​​ (@asiiana)
depop → www.depop.com/kaiti_yoo​​​ (@kaiti_yoo)
email → [e-mail]
CHAPTERS
00:00 - INTRO
1:51 - DISCLAIMERS + TRIGGER WARNINGS
2:29 - WHAT TO EXPECT
2:46 - MY JOURNEY
8:55 - MY TIPS & ADVICE
12:24 - PRETTY PRIVILEGE
ON ME
A24 Sweatshirt - shop.a24films.com/products/a-...
Lip Liner (nothing but nude) - shop-links.co/cgoYIQjazfN
ITEMS SHOWN / MENTIONED
my favorite author, James Clear - jamesclear.com/
my other favorite author, Brene Brown - brenebrown.com/
OTHER RESOURCES
NEDA - www.nationaleatingdisorders.o...
Lili Reinhart's speech on body image - • Lili Reinhart’s Reveal...
If you are located in the U.S., contact the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA) Helpline at 1-800-931-2237 for support, resources, and treatment options.
MUSIC
Epidemic Sound. Try it for free here → share.epidemicsound.com/3lBwhl​
Music by MYSM - Soft Cream - thmatc.co/?l=F67D0D00
MY FILMING EQUIPMENT
camera → bit.ly/3B8Elvj
iphone (i use it to vlog a lot!) → bit.ly/3aU9Ka4
wide lens → shop-links.co/174814599022678...
mic → bit.ly/3BYVdWs
rig adapter (to move the mic away from the viewfinder) → bit.ly/3vqgw0J
CURRENT SUB COUNT: 470,052
FTC: This video is not sponsored, but some of the above links may be affiliate.
if you're reading this, comment BACK TO THE BATHTUB

[@KaitiYoo]

Welcome to the Bubble Bath, bestie… minus the bath and the bubbles… but ANYWAYS, it was really on my heart to make this video at the beginning of a new year, a time where we place crazy expectations on ourselves, especially on our physical bodies. For anyone going through something right now, you’re doing great and PROGRESS IS NOT LINEAR, SO BE NICE TO YOURSELF. THAT IS AN ORDER. ❤️

[@lizlisadolly]

ilysm

[@patricialouise9140]

Kaiti!!! ❤

[@aksharathapa5527]

Thanks a lot Kaiti ❤️🥰😘

[@gaiacristiani3272]

I started following you a few months ago but you helped me so much with my clothes and you are so funny!! keep going❤️

[@icedteainabag]

kaiti, why do you always come up with the MOST TIMELY advice ever 😭

[@mickeylev6494]

why hello fellow sims player

[@KaitiYoo]

;) telepathy

[@Sam-0827]

Literally!

[@aashipandey298]

I get such a big sister vibe from you, thanks for being vulnerable and talking about something which is obviously very difficult for you. We really appreciate it

[@user-friendly9969]

Wow you look beautiful sorry that was random but I get Anne Frank vibes from you

[@KaitiYoo]

I so appreciate you sticking around to listen!

[@racheljank1163]

We need less "triumph narratives" and more "here's where I am at and here's how I am managing...or not managing." Thank you for sharing your journey!

[@taliw7736]

Right

[@getinlouiser2677]

I’ve learned that working on feeling neutral about my appearance and body is actually more helpful than being confident coz that’s easier to achieve 😂 I know the media now is really focusing on how we should love ourselves but what’s not talked a lot about is how acceptance of oneself works well too and even better in the long term

[@getinlouiser2677]

Anyways thanks kaiti for this video!! I agree with how most youtubers only share advice/tips when they have successfully overcome their struggles and I appreciate you for being vulnerable here🥰

[@courteneyskye5690]

Yes!!! Body neutrality is so important!

[@nathaliem3423]

@@courteneyskye5690 it is a great goal for anyone and is more achievable for someone who is deep in their body negativity

[@runway5338]

Cannot agree more! There were times that I disliked my body, but for the most part I would be neutral towards it. It actually made appreciating my body come easier than trying to be confident about it from the get-go. I acknowledged my ugly days and my pretty days. But most of the time, I’m fairly neutral about it and how I look. I’ve come to see it as a vessel I need to take care of in order to live the life I want in this world. I’m able to concentrate more on my life and what I’m doing rather than constantly think about how I look when I’m in a body-neutral mindset.

[@GiuliaHalkier]

10000%! love it and couldn't agree more.

[@moomira1004]

kaiti has learned so much about herself, now she's reminding us to never be hard on ourselves. lets work hard to accept ourselves, slowly but surely. thank you for this video.

[@KaitiYoo]

thank you for listening!

[@zeenatsi773]

Also 'Editing Kaiti' needs a different fanbase please.. she randomly popping in is so cute to me Idk why 😭😂

[@KaitiYoo]

HAHAHAH this comment made my day 🥺 she truly is a different alter-ego, isn’t she?

[@zeenatsi773]

@@KaitiYoo Awww my God sooo happy to do that.. Yeassss and we Love it 😭💞

[@kathleenmcnaughton3392]

Looooove her too. Can we be three besties?? You’ll be the gorgeous funny and spontaneous AND sensitive hugging night in friends and I’ll…. Be the one that asks to hang out??

[@zeenatsi773]

@@kathleenmcnaughton3392 ohh Yeaaaa I mean why nott that's so sweet btw💘 I'm always ready for hangouts with lovely ppls💃

[@DiogoChris]

I've never commented in your channel before, but I felt the need to say this: Thank you so much for being so vulnerable 🙏❤. It's not always easy. And one big takeaway I got from this video is that I don't have to wait till I'm victorious over a certain struggle before I can share it and help someone else out. I always feel the same way you do, thinking about it. I always feel that I'm not qualified to help someone out seeing as I'm still struggling myself. But this video proved me wrong. So, thank you. And I hope this helps so many other people out as well: those going through body dis morphia and other related issues 🤗😚💜💜

[@KaitiYoo]

This means so much to me, thank you. 100% agreed, I'm trying to internalize more that none of our experiences, trials, or hardships are wasted if we can share our experiences with others!

[@risika]

I was listening to a podcast that said, “it’s important to live life by design rather than emotion. Basically, sticking to a routine is what allows us to be the healthiest version of ourselves (especially when you're fighting these demons ex. OCD for me). I’ve had to overhaul how I approach taking care of my brain (exercise, journaling, studying etc) by practising mediocre consistency. Now I try to put in consistent 50-60% effort into my habits - to make sure I do it I began recording it and posting it on YT. After a really bad depression phase I started to believe I couldn’t change and I’d feel that horrible forever. Now Im trying to work on my self from the inside to outside. Historically I have a habit of going too hard, not being able to sustain the Herculean effort, giving up and hating myself. So now I’m trying to give a small, consistent mediocre effort everyday. And its crazy how it adds up. Finally i feel regulated enough to have coherent thoughts and figure out my body image stuff.

[@deepikaa.18]

Exponential growth

[@Shaunie98]

I can totally relate to hearing a family member comment on weight gain after looking a certain way for years and how that can just mess with your head

[@laiching19990928]

This video came when I needed it the most. Since the start of the new year my feed has been flooded with "that girl" routines and glow up videos and I've been feeling so heavy for the past week because of this invisible pressure and expectation to display, externally, "my best self" to everyone around me, on and off social media. Thank you for sharing your journey and your advice! Sending all my love and light to you and anyone reading this 🤍💫

[@KaitiYoo]

It takes a lot of self-awareness to even make such a realization. Proud of you and rooting for you!!!

[@usedtobehere02]

2022 is the year I’m trying to lower standards for myself (in terms of how hard I am on myself in certain aspects aHHHH) but raise standards for my ideal type so hopefully this video will help with that first part which will tHEN help w the second part 😋

[@kashishkukreja5904]

I am sure sonali will get nothing but the best for her mind and body❤️

[@yunilaa9194]

OMG SONALI

[@usedtobehere02]

@@yunilaa9194 OMG VANILLA VANELLO

[@yunilaa9194]

@@usedtobehere02 SLAYY

[@mfaith3129]

I personally am always happy when someone talks about any mental health/body image issues as if it wasn’t for people talking about them online, I would of never realised I went through certain things in my younger life Thanks Kaiti, I know some of us watching this will benefit from this

[@adugie3827]

“Everyone wants to see what’s underneath, so they know they’re not alone.” Kaiti, this is probably one of the best pieces of for anyone to hear. So many people think that vulnerability is a flaw, but it is really one of the greatest traits to build stronger bonds and get a life you desire.

[@thefilipinonerd]

i think it’s good that you’re making this video while still on your journey to body confidence. progression is not a straight line by any means, so it’s nice to see someone with us rather than talking after the fact.

[@julianahung]

kaiti talks like a professional author holy crap. ik u are “a random person in a bathtub giving advice,” but thanks for this video it was all articulated so well

[@eanderson9599]

The idea of “body positivity” always fell flat on me, because it’s very clearly for a small subset of people

[@khalilahd.]

Not her starting my day with self love and amazing content! We love it here 😂❤️

[@ambys1709]

As the eldest daughter of an Asian family with no older role model to turn to when advice is desperately needed, this video helped so much. I'm going through a dark period of my life and though I'm sure I will work my way out of it eventually, I've never had anyone to discuss this issue or talk about with. To me you're like the wiser big sister that I've always needed. Thank you so much!

[@EldariaMinecarftienne]

Loved this video! As a bisexual, it is sooo hard for me to find a healthy middle between looking at a beautiful woman and being attracted by her or wishing I looked more like her

[@javelle9579]

thank you for making this video -- as a teen living today's modernized world, with social media & just absurd societal standards for beauty these days, i think in general people my age become wayy more vulnerable to such lack of body confidence issue. such videos really do remind me that i'm not alone! so thank you kaiti :-) so glad i found you through youtube! all the best 💛

[@azagaz1345]

thank you so much for sharing ! i have a lot of food anxiety and through 2021, the most important things i learned are that 1) recovery is never straightforward, and 2) it's not so much about 'curing' your problems, but learning to minimise and live with them. i think your tips are really useful, so thank you !!

[@GiuliaHalkier]

Totally feel you with the food anxiety. I spent my whole life having food anxiety. One of the tools that transformed my life with food was EFT tapping. I share more about it on my channel. Lots of love to you! You got this!

[@tokiohotelx3er]

This is so great. As an ex fitness head who is trying to get back into it after falling off because of low self esteem, I really appreciate your perspective and vulnerability. Thank you for sharing your story

[@aasthaverma1887]

Sharing ones state of mind in harsh periods of life is very difficult for anyone who really came through it all... I could totally relate with u kaiti!

[@AJHaven]

I think the whole "not allowed to feel shitty because others have it worse"-mentality (like with "pretty privilege" or anything really) can be really detrimental to your well-being and mental health. If I'm feeling happy, I wouldn't NOT be happy just because there are people in the world happier than me. So why should it be that way when I'm having a bad day? Everyone is allowed emotions and to feel shitty and insecure, regardless of whatever "privilege" they have or other people label them to have. Everyone struggles sometimes in life and it shouldn't matter how hard you struggle or how often you struggle for that fight to be validated. Really glad you made this video, Kaiti, it definitely should be addressed more and normalized! Lots of love from Sweden

[@GraceA]

I don't know how you have the ability in THIS VIDEO to address exactly what i've been going through but wow. i am emotional :')

[@shazabi_stop]

I love this. I’ve also gone through some things that made me feel like I needed to “perfect” my body in accordance to my personal beauty standards. After recognizing that my mindset was unhealthy, I changed my habits by setting small goals for myself. I also wrote a paper on beauty standards and that helped me to look at where I was though an unbiased lens and change for the better.

[@GiuliaHalkier]

Yup. the whole feeling that you need to have a "perfect body" totally ruined most of my life. I spent my whole life having anxiety about my body and never feeling good enough. One of the tools that transformed my life with my body was EFT tapping. I share more about it on my channel. Lots of love to you! You got this!

[@liliewhite]

thank you for the insight, kaiti. i actually teared up, which i didn’t think i would. you have this way of making me comfortable with listening to you or that you’re talking to me. that last line of saying “we’re all players in a game we didn’t really sign up for, but in realising that we are in the game we can start to dismantle the rules a little bit”, that changed my perspective. i guess i was thinking too much about myself that i didn’t realise to look at the big picture because really, people don’t look at us 24/7. it’s usually just our thoughts going places because we see ourselves in the mirror every day. i’m very grateful - truly, thank you kaiti.

[@aspen1770]

thank you sm for bringing up that everyone has the right to be insecure. i always feel bad for not liking my body, because a lot of people (my friends included) say that im not allowed complain about being so skinny and bony.

[@racheljxw]

Omg thank you so so much for this. My body confidence and self love within the past year has been so low, I needed this so much thank you!! 💗

[@isabelleb-l2699]

Thank you for being so open about all this, it is very appreciated❤️

[@rebekahc3073]

Thank you so much for being vulnerable and sharing with us! ❤

[@marianna380]

I loved this so much kaitie, and I really needed it, I've been soo insecure lately and seeing that it's normal and that someone like you who is so beautiful struggles too makes me feel better

[@aditisaha8190]

literally needed this so bad, thank you, kaiti

[@inbetween_theDocumentary]

Literally one of the great things that happened to me so far is I found ur channel. Thank you!!

[@lina5699]

Kaiti, it was incredible of you to share your story. You've done all if us a huge difference discussing body image. I've mild body image issues. It's not detrimental but I always seek to improve the image I have of health and beauty. Thank you so much. Giving you a virtual hug.

[@LucileHR]

This is such an important video! Thank you Kaiti!

[@-sbocciare2277]

i’ve never seen ur channel before but i’m really glad i found this. i’ve hated my body for almost ten years now. i still hate it every day. thank you for the advice and for sharing your own story. it’s appreciated

[@nixcom5368]

Thank you so much for sharing this, and for allowing me and others to understand that being vulnerable is not a negative thing. thank you

[@lia_fei_]

I’ve truly been BINGING and LOVING all of your videos 😌 thank YOO for being so open and vulnerable with us. we stan a realistic queen 👑

[@anubhapathania7667]

Kaiti you are spreading so much love and self confidence. Like I can imagine that it can be scary to be vulnerable and put yourself out but you did it for us. I am so grateful, thank you!

[@HannaGoldberg199]

Thank you for being so brave to inspire all of us

[@Torivegaa78]

YOU are the first reason I started journelling and I still do it🥰Thanks Kaiti

[@thatweirdval6265]

thank you, really. i'm pretty sure a lot of people needed to hear this bc it helps a lot ♡

[@lorelaileigh5744]

this feels like a big hug🥺❤️

[@donniep.1513]

So young and so brilliant. This video was RIGHT on time

[@BrielleJuliet]

Thank you for this kaiti. Ur honesty is refreshingn

[@gaiacristiani3272]

Thank you so much for this video!! you’re so right: everyone has their struggles. Your advices were so helpful to me and I want to start therapy, to help myself even more. Love you!

[@usedtobehere02]

thank you so much for being vulnerable with us Kaiti

[@xlorenjeu]

You're such an incredible woman. Your video is just everything I need in the most perfect time.

[@sarahmiller5133]

This was such an amazing video for me

[@hannahzhou7537]

thank YOO for sharing your journey! hearing this made me realize i am NOT heading towards a healthy direction but also that it's not too late to turn it around

[@94NikolES]

I love that you decided to do this type of video; thank you for being vulnerable ❤

[@mahishitut7240]

It's really admirable that you spoke to us so unfiltered and how you spoke about it in a very sensible way. Really amazing!!

[@vaishnavisingh9089]

needed it so bad :(( thank you for this kaiti, power to you

[@snow_flake655]

Queen Kaiti back to give us all the advice we need✨

[@athenawong7788]

thank you for being vulnerable kaiti and sharing something that isn't normally addressed but should be!!

[@laurasmith9784]

Kaiti confirming once again why she’s one of my favorite KZbinrs 🤩 thank you for your vulnerability queen 💜💜

[@jessicagreen4965]

Thank you for making this video! Honesty and vulnerability are so important, especially relating to body dysmorphia and other health-related issues. You are making a difference 💚

[@lealanglands3875]

This was so important, I am very proud of you queen. Thank you for making me feel very seen today ❤️

[@mysoookhee]

love love LOVE how eloquent you are

[@CyndyTangerineyyyy]

Thank you for being vulnerable, Kaiti! This video has helped so many people. Keep doing Yoo!

[@mollymatlock1693]

Thank you for making this video. It’s something a lot of people struggle with and I know some of the points you made in this video will stick with me. Thank you so much.

[@almondmilk1659]

Thanks for posting this! After i made a tentative mental recovery regarding this topic I never thought I would be able to watch a video about it without being overcome by anxiety and fear (I was scared to 'relive' it or whatev) but I am happy to say it was all good and your insight is amazing.

[@divyaaa013]

I am so proud of you Kaiti!! Even though you go through so much, you still manage to make soooo many people happy!!! You're so strong, keep growing♡

[@TaylorBell]

Super well said Kaiti 😊 Proud of you!!

[@hiiiroobee]

Thank you for being vulnerable. As someone who’s always struggled with body image, I love what you’ve talked about in this video. Thank you for being amazing Kaiti

[@bambsie3104]

Thank you so so much for uploading this Kaiti! I really needed some advice, I wish everyone the best on their journey to loving yourself and you're body! We'll all get through this

[@gabriellekh3623]

Kaiti comes in with this vid even when she is still in her own process of healing, of taking care of herself and I appreciate that so much. And I'm wishing her the best of luck in the rest of her journey

[@yardendistelfeld6846]

This came at a really great time, I was feeling very dysmorphic today after a long streak of feeling good about myself. This really put everything in perspective. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this video.

[@vanessatan4602]

this video had such a nice balanced tone to it, without making it too serious. thanks for sharing this version of u kaiti! ❤️

[@jarradevi]

Thank you so much for this video… I can’t properly put into words how much this helped or made me feel, but it’s like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I think needed to hear what you said, as someone I look up to a lot. I hope this journey continues upwards for all of us :)) 💕

[@jeannie1920]

thank you so so much for being vulnerable with us kaiti. i'm currently dealing with severe eczema myself and i was even originally going to skip over your story, thinking it would be irrelevant to me, but i stuck around and listened and was so surprised to hear how much i could relate to you. thanks for making this video, it means a lot

[@alicelaugharne6695]

THIS!!!! THANK you

[@montallalynirishe.7381]

literally just found your channel with a different video and now i see that YOU JUST POSTED? this is, in fact, fate and just what i need. thank you!

[@radiantridhima8052]

I love kaiti she is honestly such a vibe

[@Anna-gb1nz]

kaiti, your videos are so calming you're like the big sis i never had

[@jonathanjackson6111]

❤️ I absolutely loved this! especially the talk on vulnerability. Right what i needed at this time, im a music producer/audio engineer who has had some small successes but never really wanted to expose them because i felt they weren’t big enough to post about. But now I’m slowly learning to retrain my brain, body, and spirit!

[@femalenuwanda8033]

thank you so much for making this video, is literally all i needed

[@samanthahinton2501]

love this video so much!! as someone going through a similar journey, I appreciate you talking about this and being so vulnerable ❤️

[@tralala88]

"Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become" is an amazing quote. Can't believe I haven't heard it before. Thank you. Great advice x

[@tasneemkamal5136]

we appreciate this video so much kaiti, thank you for sharing your experience with us. i also started going to therapy in summer 2021 and it was a life changer :)

[@lynnloveseggs]

ty for sharing and being so transparent abt ur ongoing journey

[@tamarap11873]

Thank you so much for sharing your story 💜 social media is definitely one of my triggers & sometimes I feel like something is wrong with me because I can’t keep it under control but this video validates my feelings & reassures I need to prioritize my mental health, even when it’s different from what everyone else is doing.

[@melodysamuel2265]

Most favorite video of yours yet, thank you!

[@emmahopp7618]

Thank you so much Kaiti, this really meant a lot to me. Making a video like this must have been so hard, but from the bottom of my heart thank you for being willing to be vulnerable and give a voice to what so many of us think and feel about our bodies. As someone working through these kinds of things like you know I'm praying for you. Thanks again, love you Kaiti!!!

[@lebenegbedawo3448]

Thank you so much for filming this video. Some of the best advice I have ever gotten about body image. God bless you fr

[@zoyasheikh6178]

That was so REAL and COURAGEOUS...... thankyou so much for this kaiti😢💓💓💓

[@poppycalliope]

I think a lot of us needed to hear what you said Kaiti. I've been feeling a little bit insecure the past months. I think I should try to focus on myself more and be more kind with myself ❤

[@gaiasillari2893]

THANK YOU FOR BEING TRUE TO EVERYONE AND ALL THE TIPS

[@steffinaomi123]

Kaiti, your advices are extremely helpful! I love the way you articulate your thought process and your opinion regarding this matter! Thank you Kaiti 💕

[@kygjww]

Just listening to you boosts my confidence Tysm for this video

[@dzanegulles]

I super love how your thoughts run. Thank you so much for this.

[@kaitlynseitz1420]

Just found your channel via this video. Thank you for being so vulnerable!!! This is such an important topic that is NOT talked about in healthy ways. You're incredible, and thank you for being so open.

[@aznstefani]

You are my new favorite channel! Thank you for being so vulnerable, knowledgeable, fun, and an overall baddie!

[@piperkeigley3387]

thank you so much, I have been struggling with this, and it is so so nice to know that im not alone in it 💜❤️

[@aquamoon9465]

i really respect you for making this video and really thankful too, because even if i didnt know, i did need this type of video where someone talks about stuff no one does. Up till now, i used to think workouts are only for being in shape like how the society tells us to be, i never really thought that its for us to feel good too thats why i really am grateful for this video, thank you kaiti❤

[@sofialaz3546]

You actually are so helpful to me rn cause sometimes you just need to see that everyone has insecurities, and people are always 100% confident

[@ravenkoh5818]

you honestly keep me alive thanks kaiti :')

[@LanaClara]

Thank you for this video, it was really important. Sending you lots of love, Kaiti! You're the best