I Somehow Got a World Record Speedrun

[@kurtisconner]

ATTENTION NEW VIEWERS OF THIS VIDEO: as of May 6th, 2021; me record was beaten :( i knew it was only a matter of time but i'm gonna try to get it back!

[@PepperoniCuts]

Oh sh*t here we again

[@illuminatitime796]

kurtis please go to fucking bed

[@gaiangalaxy3198]

Holy shit I literally just clicked

[@jackoshmako1193]

😔 at least you had it

[@pinkelephant4153]

Nooooooo

[@aggy_swagg9061]

kurtis: "I've never been this angry" kurtis: *yelling in lowercase*

[@bayan8532]

Yeah fr I wish I was this chill

[@jewelxiat]

Those damn chill Canadians... 🤣

[@hiobio69]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

[@ayla5909]

literally so composed

[@BlackMantius]

Being Canadian myself, I can say that quiet anger is no more chill than loud anger, only more polite.

[@KimdraStBiryukova]

"I've never been so angry in my entire life." Kurtis' anger: "Ah dang it."

[@ryshow9118]

Those are expletives for our canuck friends

[@rileyd7250]

“Gosh darn it!”

[@Champion_Vapor]

canadian rage is not to bad

[@mangolorian6627]

His anger surprised me I almost fell out my seat I’ve never seen him so mad

[@abbymockensturm7682]

@@kenzyecollins1199 well it’s a lot better than americans 🤣

[@Bookofjenesis888]

Seeing Kurtis express his frustration by saying “cmon man” is so funny to me

[@Sydney-Casket-Base]

canadian rage is very mellow

[@TeamRonify]

Joe Biden energy

[@dansenkat]

right? i would have been cursing like a sailor

[@CupidFeathers]

dude he literally sounds like he's doing one of his skits when he's angry

[@galileodos4329]

@@dansenkat yea same I would just run out of curses and curse because of that

[@fox_kingofpancakes]

the guy that originally had the record went back and reclaimed it 💀💀 thats the funniest shit ive ever seen. poor kurt tho

[@kamsydraws]

I'm telling ypu 🤣🤣

[@N0T_MY_N4M3]

someone on the leaderboard is literally named “KurtisConnerIsTrash” the utter disrespect. that is our mayor their taking about

[@diancavilla6422]

Watching this way later in the future and seeing this comment crushes me 😭😔

[@sebastiengermain506]

and still cannot beat his time haha@@N0T_MY_N4M3

[@nishitagoel3210]

I just checked it and damn....that guy is committed.

[@teddybear51666]

Okay but unironically, this man pulled off an impressive speedrun. Like the game doesn't even matter, people speed run so many obscure games, but the fact he was literally doing runs to shave off mere seconds, and discovering techniques to do so, is insanely dedicated and this isn't some copout half-assed record, the mad man ACTUALLY did it

[@Skelliiie]

It's genuinely super fucking impressive, not a lot of people can do what he did

[@juanrocollazo]

And he got it in merely three weeks while still pumping out content on the side. What a mad man.

[@bree7209]

Fr and on the very last run- that's so impressiveee

[@magazinekirby]

You can’t knock the dedication

[@c8517]

This video is secretly just Kurtis giving us a tutorial on how to be a good father via anecdotal evidence.

[@ashikjaman1940]

The secret: golf

[@almscurium]

Anecdotal evidence for what?

[@livingirl92]

LMFAOOO YO THIS IS THE SMARTEST COMMENT IVE EVER READ

[@kelceyfirth]

@@almscurium of how to be a good father

[@duhbigweiner665]

Fr

[@mbell3609]

The idea of your girlfriend hearing you rage at a 90s N64 golf game for hours a day is just hysterical to me.

[@willowmarie218]

And she's like "babe you really have to stop this I'm worried"

[@artnerd3727]

Honestly during this whole video I was thinking poor Jenna

[@hannah-dj8hc]

@Jim Bo what

[@camillehebert479]

i kept imagining him ranting about a stupid golf game at the dinner table after she asked about his day

[@SimonVanliew26]

@Jim Bo yeah bro you clearly don’t follow kurtis on Instagram lmao his girlfriend is hotter than anyone that’s ever looked at you my guy

[@danclaydon6588]

Why is no one talking about how absurd it is that he finally beat the record by ONE SECOND on his LAST ATTEMPT ever. And even funnier that he didn't even realise straight away

[@AaronAlias]

cause he kinda talked about it himself in the video? 🤔

[@kaskaskas]

They’re not saying we have to talk about it because he didn’t notice himself 🙄🙄 just that we should talk about it because it’s insane. It’s almost like that’s the point of being in the audience.

[@spawnpoint111]

@@kaskaskasokay

[@MoonyD-yy4xm]

I thought it was 2 seconds more?

[@tylerblalack6684]

​@@kaskaskasthe point of watching shit is to talk about it with immature strangers on the internet? Fuck I've been doing it wrong my whole life

[@kiera8054]

guys kurtis invented speedrunning what a legend

[@espicfh]

DOOM weeps quietly in the corner

[@doxaweit]

U GOT A HEART FROM THE MAYOR CONGRATSS

[@kiera8054]

@@doxaweit AH THANKS

[@biggaylol5438]

Yeah, wonder when he had the time between being the mayor of a town with a 2.97 mil population and making content.

[@theboyofwonders3112]

😳

[@genericname2747]

Kurtis getting the world record on the last day, and thinking he didn't get the world record is like something STRAIGHT out of a movie.

[@natalieisabela5282]

and the fact that he beat the record by a SECOND

[@adoriinu]

Memento Mori, my fellow comrade (I am so sorry, I couldn't hold that one back ; I saw the spiral, my brain screamed "UNUS ANNUS").

[@genericname2747]

@@adoriinuUNUS ANNUS UNUS ANNUS

[@josha2141]

@@genericname2747 UNUS ANNUS UNUS ANNUS!

[@althealligator1467]

Also the fact that it was literally his last run, and he beat it by one second.

[@drewisgooden]

Kurtis Conner? More like Epic Gamer 😈

[@anna_banana414]

hmmmm. well hello there.

[@oats8854]

he's after Danny's title 😰

[@BeatlesLover3796]

Oh hey Danny

[@helenheins4593]

what’s danny doing here? crazy man

[@Iexapro]

Kurtis Poggers

[@gh0stym0sty27]

Normal Speedrunners: The #01 Time is stuck in my head until I beat it Kurtis: I forgor 💀

[@imagery5425]

He forgor 💀

[@kronemerj]

He frogger🐸

[@dojo3011]

He fog🌫

[@_.eclipse]

He forgor 💀

[@hanamaryam7882]

He forgor⚒

[@timhyde1726]

the chainsmokers “hey” joke will go down in history as why the heck did I laugh at that

[@-maya-6498]

PLEASE IT WAS SO FUNNY

[@aquablueyt3700]

I was wheezing for 30 seconds straight. I can't-

[@birdie4793]

i laughed so hard

[@earthtoj9]

WHY WAS IT SO FUNNY??

[@Oley44]

time stamp?

[@starsiadraws]

Every single day Kurtis comes closer and closer to becoming a 70s dad. The mullet, the mustache, and now golf.

[@shadowcultist]

the golf predates the mullet actually

[@E.M.99.]

Super close, now he just needs those shorts

[@abandonedmuse]

The polyester plaid pants

[@JustSitAndLaugh]

He legit looks like my dad in the 90s though

[@2pedroandrade]

Now he needs Ray-Ban aviator glasses

[@taltzi]

danny and kurtis uploaded at the same time, this is a hate crime against the indecisive population of both kurtistown and greg

[@diyabalan8407]

I beg of you, pleaseeeee tell me where your pfp is from

[@taltzi]

@@diyabalan8407 lmao, i can't remember since i've had it for... around 2 years, but just type in monsters inc boo gavin meme into google

[@Daniel..............]

ah yes, the population of Greg. The city where everyone is named Kurtistown.

[@mlokgerm]

The Gregs of Kurtistown

[@taltzi]

@@mlokgerm about right

[@janationaltreasure]

the actual disrespect of the people that hopped on there to move kurt from #1 to #5. it's the law to be nice to kurt and they BROKE IT

[@gayraccoon353]

Death penalty >:(

[@biggestastiest]

EXILE!!!!!!

[@intoxicatedrazzledazzle]

gotta give ‘em the french revolution special

[@clownestfan]

NOT citizens of kurist town >:(

[@larvaedadindex]

you gotta always get a faster run tho!

[@ellies5431]

The passive aggression toward his dad really killed me

[@arianadejesus7]

fr omg he really was firing shots left & right 💀😭

[@stela9046]

when?

[@stela9046]

i think i missed that

[@lindamukarakate7511]

@@stela9046 the intro to the video when he was talking about his biological father getting him an N64 and he could only use it at his house blah blah blah

[@mjgray192]

@@stela9046 starts at 3:25

[@yikes.]

number one victory royale, yeah kurtis we boutta get down (get down)

[@michellehalliburton4455]

ten kills on the board right now just wiped out Kurtistown

[@dumbhead128]

my mayor just gto downed, i revived him now we're heading to town

[@Saturn.56]

Now we're in the Kurtistown streets

[@brianahodnett]

Look at the map go to the marked sheets

[@garfieldfan98]

Take me to your Xbox to play kurtis today

[@froge5933]

Alternative title: Kurtis having a mental breakdown over antique golfing for 30 minutes

[@amaliar5735]

aka three weeks...

[@wolfeevi]

aka 21 days...

[@whawhawhawhaaaa]

aka 30,240 minutes...

[@meat._loaf]

aka 1,814,400 seconds…

[@turbkeysamdwich1880]

Closer to 15 minutes but sure.

[@bighoodie4315]

Kurtis has currently been bumped down to 5th best speedrun in that specific category, a full minute and 27 seconds behind the current #1 spot. RIP.

[@kufASMR]

Damnnnn, hey he had it at one point at least

[@data-_-]

The person who has first is actually brocis420, the person who had it in the first place. He came back for revenge

[@FrogOnADogsSittingOnALog]

@@data-_- and brocis said that his wr had a “slow start” and “decent middle”

[@rubengerritsen6868]

it's the same guy even, what a villain story

[@C.V317]

And No. 10 is currently “KurtisConneristrash”

[@Bismuth9]

Thanks for the shoutout!

[@wowyouro]

If only he didn’t butcher your name lol

[@theaceofspadez_]

Potassium

[@ashikjaman1940]

@@theaceofspadez_ Zirconium

[@YourAverageSpelunker]

I love ur vids dude

[@schizoframia4874]

Poggers

[@RizzlerLegacy]

Kurtis: I have never been this angry in my life. Him being Angry: :| :(

[@Juanmaligno]

He literally cried lol he was big mad and I understand lol

[@sanskritiiyer9785]

exactly my thoughts lmaoo

[@saucysacrilegious]

it's cuz he's canadian

[@ilymitski]

me being angry looks the same

[@WelziFC7]

SmallAnt is 1000% the type of dude to talk to Kurtis and then secretly go and break his record without telling him

[@isaiahromero9861]

Probably why Kurtis didn't tell him what game he was running LOL

[@ditzyrose700]

@@isaiahromero9861 That's because Kurtis already knows the secret first rule of speedrunning: Never tell another runner that you're trying to break a record.

[@Everettalla]

Why are we talking about smallant

[@dashtara3074]

@@Everettalla because he was in the video

[@thestarperson]

@Dr. Lobter because he’s in the video??

[@RandomPerson-zx8ze]

“*like* thirty one minutes” don’t lie kurtis. you know the exact time. you were proud of it and memorized it.

[@lovely8524]

Kurtis is the most chill-angry person I have ever seen this man does not get rage

[@adamburdt8794]

This is how passive people express rage. with legit points and such

[@johnfreaky8683]

@@adamburdt8794 nah it’s because he’s Canadian

[@adamburdt8794]

@@johnfreaky8683 I think my point still stands

[@SimoneintheSkies]

He’s a Taurus lol

[@teriyakigod944]

Hes canadian

[@brynnawill7475]

kurtis: nobody beat my record all 11 people in the world who own this game: just try and stop me

[@AndrewJW]

I actually have this dog shit game 😂

[@sauleaseviciute5668]

@@AndrewJW congratulations! You're one of the eleven

[@thatoneguy9582]

@@AndrewJW speedrun

[@nokiohascontent]

@@AndrewJW speedrun

[@universal_stupidity]

@@AndrewJW speedrun

[@sophia-np2wl]

i can't believe you tricked me into watching a video about golf

[@salma3519]

LOL

[@avery3938]

Fr I hate golf

[@kuromi8384]

no literally

[@radio227]

Thx for commenting this, didn’t know it was about golf clicking off

[@avery3938]

@@radio227 no it’s a good video

[@demi_lynnx]

Updated top 5 leaderboard as of April 21, 2023 1st place: 10m 15s - brocis420 2nd place: 10m 39s - FxTourmaline41 3rd place: 11m 03s - rusto 4th place: 11m 27s - FunkyABBA 5th place: 11m 42s - kurtisconner

[@Milk73278]

tisk tisk. can't believe they beat our mayor

[@ellapsed]

kurtis has been suffering for the past 3 weeks and we had no idea

[@irrelevancyiskey9992]

dude i didn't think anyone still had this as their profile picture... i thought i suddenly developed dementia at 18

[@rita9942]

For real 😭💀

[@IrideLastMtb]

No no, Kurtis has just been evolving into the ultimate gamer

[@guy136]

@@IrideLastMtb I’d say that’s suffering as well lol

[@headmelter]

If ANYBODY takes this poor man’s 1st place - I’m hunting you down.

[@MG3B92]

I just bought a copy, I want to see how crazy that time is myself

[@vianna9428]

If Mayor Kurtis is sad I’m sad, Id Mayor Kurtis is a winner Im a winner. If anybody even tries to shake his happiness we, as loyal citizens, have the DUTY to kill you. It’s in the law

[@louloubell4015]

@@vianna9428 it is the law!

[@mookow2]

I give it about a few hours

[@MrGhostTheBigRoast]

the person's record he beat said kurtis was talented and they would like to see him improve his time.

[@ghost-zw8rj]

even when he’s angry he’s still so calm

[@rajeshbalan4088]

right i would be screaming

[@LlamacornAlpaca]

it's the canadian in him

[@erloser6942]

@@rajeshbalan4088 oh hey hange

[@arima_song]

@@rajeshbalan4088 I'd be breaking stuff, hurting myself and yelling at everyone around me :( Thank god I don't do speedruns

[@rajeshbalan4088]

@@arima_song RIGHTT

[@jessu5105]

the fact that brocis420 got his record back is kind of beautiful

[@PissyLissy]

Wait, he did? Lmao good for him

[@Teeniewolf]

And the time he got was insane…. 👏🏻

[@I_love_mjj]

I don’t know why, but when I read this, I started crying… it’s not beautiful it’s betrayal! It’s criminal! It’s absurd!!!

[@mickeynotmouse]

He deserves it too

[@justgonnacomment]

FAKERS OF KURTISTOWN all jokes aside it is wholesome❤

[@cookiepredator1]

Kurtistown’s official sport is now this game

[@bunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunz]

It's the official sport but it's also illegal

[@SomebodyUnamed]

Yes

[@strawhatsmanager]

@@bunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunz yep

[@frogking5298]

as it should be

[@dingodog711]

Yes

[@fluttervixen]

The look on Kurtis' face when he gets the staircase glitch added ten years to my life Edit: this is super stupid, but thanks for the likes! This is my most liked comment ever, I'm super grateful!

[@patriciadebatlle4245]

9:23

[@SassierThanAugust]

then he lost 100 years after playing the golf game

[@pr0ntab]

BLJ fam!

[@BaBaBaBenny]

Ah yes, Kurtis Conner and his childhood best friend Connor Kurtis.

[@BT405]

The level of ego I had to go to the comments not expecting this joke to already be made

[@haleighturner8274]

@@BT405 SAME LMAOOO

[@atch300]

With his trusty dog Curtis Konner

[@JingleShoes]

Exactly what I was thinking 😭😭😭))

[@velkarious]

What about Curtis Konner?

[@eyebrows1719]

I think this video has become my comfort video or something because I keep coming back to it and enjoy it just as much every time. Idk what it is but I always end up watching it whenever I go on a mini Kurtis binge and this video does it for me every time.

[@citruslimequat]

it makes me so sad that his record has been beaten after going on this emotional journey of a youtube video

[@ryja3z]

same, this is my favorite video all time he's made, i always come back to it. fushigi is a good competitor

[@eyebrows1719]

@@ryja3z omg not you commenting when I just rewatched this again two days ago LMAOOOOO I forgot I even commented but yess the fushigi one is so good too!

[@Deafkid97]

Speed-running comfort by watching a comfort video about speed-running

[@MackenzieNoelle]

Can’t stop thinking about that tweet “men love having hobbies that make them mad” lol

[@shankaka_99]

I guess I’m a man now- sorrry I meant 🤡

[@tristanhauser5766]

@@shankaka_99 man did something he set out to do what more do you want

[@ShengFink]

@@tristanhauser5766 I think they were just making a very rude and somewhat sexist joke, not disparaging anything kurtis did specifically yk.

[@thatoneguy9582]

-that’s fair actually-

[@Peyton1218]

I feel called out

[@dantemariposon1209]

As i grew up i noticed how every girl around me knew what the worst golf videogame was, but i didn't. My mom was also confused, she said "how could you possibly not know what the worst golf game is?". A year ago i realised i am a trans man. Thanks worst golf game ever, you helped me realise so many things.

[@LannasMissingLink]

I dont know about you, but as a girl who liked games I got the crappiest, cheapest games possible when I was young. My favourite games as a kid are so obscure! Edit: oh! I just came across the joke in the video. My bad lol

[@benjidavis9525]

Oh my god it took me far longer to realize how actually good this joke is

[@augustinav2030]

im slow, could someone pls explain the joke to me D:

[@Joanna-jg3ii]

@@augustinav2030 girls knew what the worst golf game and he didnt he didnt kniw he was trans at the time so when he realized it he knew why he didnt know the worst golf game unlike the other girls cuz he was never a girl

[@fenn__fenn]

Okay but what game was it please. I get the trans joke but I don’t understand the golf joke 💀 am I too old??? Am I thinking too hard???? I’m a girl and I genuinely don’t understand what this is supposed to mean 💀 please. My crops are dying and I will not survive the winter

[@smallbean2028]

Omg dude, I'm literally so impressed you 1. Didn't cry and 2. Didn't give up. I would've 1. Cried and 2. Given up out of fear to waste time. Literally dude, well done, holy fucking shit.

[@madidiaveli]

Same I give up so easily on things, I wouldn't have had the patience for myself

[@MaksonCheese]

honestly he might have cried we only saw what he showed us, but either way the fact that he persevered through all of that. damn.

[@Yaboibarel]

I would rage quit

[@bruhbun]

What an odd sentence structure.....but yeah I'd have cried tears of rage after missing that last putt

[@bigzybonam]

Kurtis, you're now 4th in the leaderboard, blow off that cartridge and get back on top brother

[@annajackson5443]

kurtis: “ladies what’s the worst golf game?” it’s just, actual golf, i felt like that was obvious

[@coramcd4847]

that's exactly what I said

[@bruhbun]

So....is your joke supposed to be because golf is a predominantly man oriented "sport"?

[@Ya_Boi_Shaggy]

@@bruhbun nah it’s just boring. Not as bad as fishing tho

[@bebebebop8050]

”predominantly man oriented”

[@artmieseelizabeth8074]

Omg yes, genuinely the most boring sport ever.

[@tedguetta2789]

”Practice makes perfect, unfortunately” -Kurtis Conner

[@ananinamiii]

The quote that changed my life

[@runaskj7520]

The next Einstein

[@earthdimensionm1643]

Kurtis: *not posting for 2 weeks* Me: he’s probably doing something important Kurtis: *playing the worst golf game to be the best in the world at it* Me: WOW I was right this is dope

[@TroublingGem40]

1.5k likes and no replies?

[@laneyhesse8102]

Haha 😂

[@Lily-xg1qq]

If someone would have told me that they had a record of beating the water temple in 31 minutes I would have been so amazed 💀 it took me like a week to get through

[@blurrybaby225]

i love that kurtis doesn’t even yell when he’s angry, like can more people plz do that

[@illstealyourkneecaps694]

I'm here! When I'm angry I cry, or just bottle it up

[@ruesylvester]

yeah totally! can people just not express their feelings and keep everything negative to themselves unless they're exactly like Kurtis? that'd be great! :)

[@illstealyourkneecaps694]

@TheeQuinn M woah really? Huh, you learn something new everyday

[@crunchii891]

@@ruesylvester bro no one said that...

[@JaMaiCaNMaMii07]

I don’t think I’m for this idea. I’ll just scream like a crazy person for 20 seconds and then look even crazier when I suddenly become calm and quiet.

[@cinnamonroll886]

Y’all better not try to beat this record after all he went through

[@jrhooman]

@@weelilwalt i will commit hate crime

[@crimvevo]

@@weelilwalt me too lol

[@tidge5127]

2 people did D':

[@LolitaAngel6]

Unfortunately our mayor lost his first place 😔

[@lindsey9958]

The original record holder got his place back lol

[@tessooms7290]

"I turned out just fine" *thinks about life* "i-i didnt say good..."

[@shinymetagross1666]

6am hot dog

[@snakewithapen5489]

Doing just mediocre is still good enough xd

[@CosmicPigeonn]

The Smant and Kurtis crossover was a very welcome surprise that made me happy

[@bunkbeds3001]

Kurtis's face when he does the staircase glitch and just says "I did it!" is full of so much goddamn innocence I just can't handle it

[@wonderbookk]

too cute

[@g0o0ey]

hes virgin LOLLLL

[@lincolnehret]

@@g0o0ey are you speaking to a mirror 😎

[@g0o0ey]

@@lincolnehret KENOBIIIIIIIIIIIIII

[@user-ff5so3mx1n]

kurtis: *literally beats a world record* also kurtis: god i can't believe i failed

[@bump0005]

Sorry Kurtis, you may think your Habbo hotel gf story is embarrassing but my moviestarplanet boyfriend either genuinely died during surgery or faked his death to escape me. either way it was my first introduction to grief at age 10 :)

[@muffpuff8]

what the fuck.

[@pinkgreaterthansign55]

Ahhh

[@casioforester8592]

oh my god please explain this more💀💀

[@miazopia9177]

That would be a good tiktok storytime

[@honeylavenderbakery]

OH MY GOODNESS 💀

[@lauryntonio]

i come back to this video a lot, i love it so much. I wanted to share that when i play rhythm games, i'll try to hide or avoid looking at my combo - without knowing if ive missed a button my performance improves so much 😭 the convincing yourself the wrong time is such a relatable strat and this video is so genuine & authentic, kurtis if you ever see this, i think it's one your of bests

[@ghandinotsenpai9135]

I cannot believe he put himself through mental torment just as a treat for us

[@rocks1012]

God, the plot of this video really rocks my world, dude. Underdog protagonist who’s new to speedrunning and may be a bit rusty at first, but he has the heart, motivation and passion to improve. He has a history involving speedrunning, where he was overshadowed by the big leagues, humiliated by others via his own favourite game, as he was pulled into the harsh reality of speedrunning. But after being inspired by a master, he builds back his stolen confidence. He grinds, he pushes himself beyond his own limits. It’s giving me upbeat 80s montages, Footloose style. He’s doing chin ups, he’s doing finger ups (bc video games). But despite all his drive, he reaches the 3/4 mark, the lowest point in the story. He thinks he has failed. He thinks that all his work is for nothing. He’s tired, and defeated. His loved ones are telling him that he’s working himself too hard. But he’s not done yet. He remembers why he started in the first place. It’s not about winning, but the journey. With that in mind, he plays his very last run. The stakes are high. This is it. He’s playing like he’s never played before. But it’s all up to the last swing. It’s giving me Chicken Little in the baseball portion of the movie. Kurtis whispers “today is a new day”. In slow motion, he pushes the button right on time. And with that, he’s done it, he’s won. The virtual crowd goes wild (whenever they get around to watching the video) as they chant Kurtis’s name from their couches. His name is on the leaderboard. He won, not because of his will to win. He won because he changed his mindset. He stopped doing it for the leaderboards or the glory, but for himself, for his loved ones. Winning wasn’t the goal, it was improvement. And only then, did Kurtis truly win. There is character development, the 3/4 mark of supposed failure where all hope seems lost, there is a message about being driven by the journey rather than the glory, there is the triumphant ending, dude someone has to make a full length movie about this.

[@ZombixMix]

This comment is so underrated

[@sahilkainth9318]

This comment is art.

[@TheMrsapplecake]

the steaks are high lol

[@rocks1012]

@@TheMrsapplecake someone is tossing steaks into the air

[@rocks1012]

@@sahilkainth9318 I wrote this after taking too much of my ADHD medication I’m glad you like it

[@cloudofcontempt]

I’m convinced that “middle school Kurtis” is a completely different person.

[@jlc1833]

KZbinr notes app apology tings

[@BTredflag]

Isn't everyones middle school version a completely different person?

[@ruesylvester]

@@BTredflag no lol

[@brainglow_lightbright]

@@ruesylvester the answer is yes. Even on a cellular level

[@leann4265]

@@ruesylvester people Kurtis’s age, yes... most of us are completely different than our middle school selves. Shit was weird back then

[@femmeshark]

This feels like a dream: Kurtis Conner speedrunning a game as a joke, and getting tips from SmallAnt, two people I love coming together!

[@jasonhorton]

Do I watch a Kurtis video first or a Danny video it’s the ultimate Sophie’s Choice

[@DyslexicMitochondria]

I am playing both on split screen 😂

[@fritzmuehlbauer9041]

I flipped a coin

[@sterlingarcher8041]

lol

[@gillian403]

Kurtis

[@BobRossCat]

Kurtis for me. Because how did he make a world record speedrun?!

[@iwillbymitski]

After years of watching Kurtis videos, i can say that seeing him saying “cmon man” while getting frustrated is TOUCHING BOTTOM. that man was ANGRY angry

[@marnie6967]

Kurtis’s childhood friend being called Conner really makes him seem made up and I do want to believe him but I just dont

[@Kyran1996]

It's like John Mulaney's childhood friend being named John, but weirder.

[@reoaio]

*flashback to Dear Evan Hansen-*

[@srhyes6710]

I also agree he was imaginary

[@TortoiseMaximus]

He’s mentioned that friend in another vid and acknowledged the name weirdness

[@heathchisenhall1732]

I imagine his name is Conner kurtis

[@MordredRights]

30:02 this was the most stressful and nerve-racking video of all time the way I held my breath--

[@navy_teal]

“My friend, Conner” Me: Lemme guess, his last name was Kurtis?

[@pretty948]

Conner Kurtis

[@harmonysummers]

I was about to ask the same thing! XD

[@jewelxiat]

He has mentioned he gets that joke all the time before lol

[@KenziixInxDisguise]

You must be new here.

[@ilexdiapason]

and if they got married he'd be connor conner

[@zolengeb.7629]

Why is nobody talking about how he won the record by *one second* on his *final try* of the game?!

[@meghan6702]

let the man have this

[@christopherbenoit5585]

It wouldn’t have been the last try if he didn’t win

[@101Henchmen]

@@christopherbenoit5585 right before the run he said "alright so this is literally the last run im gonna do"

[@christopherbenoit5585]

@@101Henchmen that’s what everyone says hundreds of times when playing video games. Are you new?

[@ren-tanaka]

@@christopherbenoit5585 well yeah, but he did stop playing after that final run even when he thought he still didn’t beat the world record so…

[@elissalesse8320]

“if you ain’t first, youre last. .. especially when there’s only two people.” -Kurtis Conner

[@helloitsmealex9853]

Why are there no comments? Oh wait now theres one

[@VagueNaming]

Why are there no comments? Oh wait, now there’s 2

[@Cat18364]

Why are there no comments? Oh wait now there’s 3

[@dukeduck2221]

Ricky Bobby talking to...whatever tf his friend's name is.

[@elissalesse8320]

thanks everyone you are so supportive 🥹❣️

[@laustinspacemusic]

1 year later: They guy who originally held the record has reclaimed the record with a 10 minute and 15 second run. Kurtis Conner is currently sitting at #5. Kurtis went on to speed run Canada, which is really really hard.

[@semogecarg]

i can't believe kurtis said the word "runs" this many times without making a single diarrhea joke

[@digitalharmony26]

Our boy is growing up 🥲

[@piersonmcwayne1136]

My weight training teacher made a runs joke today

[@bbseal6174]

i can't believe kurtis conner said the n word, i guess he is a gamer now #cancelled

[@lungleafinthefifteenthocta6804]

@@bbseal6174 what

[@stinkystonk2240]

@@bbseal6174 what

[@TheCamthecoolio]

you probably won’t see this but this is genuinely one of your best videos you’ve ever made man... i could feel your passion for the video at minute one. genuinely shocked at how good this fucking video is.

[@i.shelton4521]

seconded. absolutely top notch content

[@TheMuddyMilesTrain]

i don't have an interest in video games, but it's really great to see the joy someone has for something, no matter what it is. really dig your comment.

[@livingirl92]

Abso fuckin lutely

[@izzie9399]

all i could think of during this whole video was the image of jenna minding her own business and then hearing her boyfriend in the other room screaming over a shitty decades-old golfing game lmfao 💀💀

[@bluejai4212]

If your friend wasn’t Conner Kurtis I’ll be upset.

[@thatoneguy9582]

“I should say that his name is also Conner, I’m not calling myself my own best friend”

[@superking208]

Everybody Loves Raymond for Genesis being rated M for Mature is too funny

[@POVpretzel]

Just looked it up. The old guy is back at number 1 with 10:15. Kurtis is in spot no.4 😭✋

[@POVpretzel]

Did not mean to do a time stamp-

[@bitebackbunny]

This video should be adapted into a full length movie. It has everything, a backstory, comedy, sad moments, touching moments, suspense, excitement, and a glorious last minute victory. P l e a s e

[@KikaHoogteijling]

i can’t believe you didn’t get to enjoy the moment you actually beat the record. that is both the funniest and saddest thing i’ve seen in weeks, and that’s huge considering the world we’re living in rn

[@Linahernandy]

If somebody told me that they could get through the water temple in 31 minutes no glitches in high school I’d be impressed

[@gvs6462]

Ong they can, like, get it.

[@gollygod]

i cannot explain why it took me 3 years to watch this video, and when you were talking abt talking to a speedrunner my mind went to Ant too!! And being a long time fan of him too its so cool that he’s in one of your vids! And ALSO Tanner… You joined a speedrunning challenge and then that same day threw yourself into that game for 8 _hours_ and yet this man was still kinda surprised when he was diagnosed with autism 😂❤️

[@ndebbqchicken9799]

This is the most visibly angry any Canadian has ever been

[@hawkii744]

Come visit Alberta buddy you’ll wish you didn’t :(

[@marieerikson]

you haven't met my mother when the dishes haven't been done

[@peril.]

You haven’t met that one uncle I have (never met in my life) when the fishing rod is an inch too far in the ice

[@gooseman6882]

You havent seen jeff my name is jeff

[@picklenik9658]

You’ve clearly never heard of the 2011 Stanley Cup finals when Vancouver lists

[@InvincibleWereWeasel]

When he said “if you aren’t first, you’re last.” It reminded me of the time my little sister and I entered into an equestrian competition. I got second in the English style category. My sister got first. We were the only English style riders.

[@acsokolowski]

I once got a second place piano competition trophy in a section with only one other person 😭

[@bonesmalone7826]

The amount of times that something has taken years off of Kurtis' life gives him about three weeks

[@Cecil...]

What song will play at his funeral?

[@mac8750]

@@Cecil... prob god made girls

[@cheesegun9352]

I swear I’ve seen you somewhere before

[@kukky29]

@@Cecil... Blood related or fergalicious

[@bonesmalone7826]

That one disco song that he uses for all of his dancing sketches

[@cottoncoffin]

Dude I got CHILLS the moment you said ocarina of time and the opening theme started. I’m like about to cry. It was such a good time man

[@sydneycoffey9702]

Kurtis: “this game no one has played” Me: *recognizes the sounds* holy shit thats the weird golf game dad had on 64 I played 🤣

[@littleblueclovers]

Now’s your chance to beat the world record✨

[@SkyLene]

is your dad brocis420

[@pankakovacs6244]

oh my god, me too!

[@ashikjaman1940]

You are nobody

[@ghoulishtoad]

Challenge him

[@GabToVi]

no one has beaten his record but one other person named “Kurtis Conner sucks” is 3rd now

[@lucasallen2987]

ty there was no way in hell i was gonna look that up but i was still interested

[@vampirecat8256]

And there's no records in walalie open (no easy shot, real hardware) so he could've done that this entire time

[@superben5102]

That guy is now fourth, guess who sucks now? 😜

[@thesleepydot]

now he's forth

[@raimarafiq6853]

yo its proof of god!!!!!!

[@christophergerics]

My mom (who passed a few years ago) and I used to play this ALL THE TIME when I was a kid. The announcer was a complete tool. Glad to see a Canadian give it some love ❤

[@xava9571]

Imagine her mom was the one with the world record lmao

[@christophergerics]

@@xava9571 THE OTHER WR IS A CANADIAN 🤔🤔🤔

[@goofy_ahhs_1416]

Almost a year ago to the day.....Kurtis is now #5. Never forget. 😢

[@cashewbag]

kurtis having a habbo hotel girlfriend makes me feel better about having a moviestarplanet girlfriend years ago 😭 we got 'married' and everything, it was incredible

[@Cecil...]

How romantic 💕

[@mikuzillas]

Omg I remember having a ‘husband’ for that Fantage game as an 8 year old, I remember sharing the same bed and it being super awkward lmao.

[@muffloid3865]

ahh same, I had so many dramas and crazy 'relationships' on there, which was a great contrast to my awkward introvert reality lmao

[@caitlinpoole520]

I had seven movie star planet gfs and 5 movie star planet bfs

[@whoa1770]

@@caitlinpoole520 we have found the true harem protagonist

[@catsplat1272]

I learned more about Kurtis' family in the first 4 minutes of this video than I have from watching his channel for 2 years

[@impulsivepessimist]

we saw his mom in a video once but i think that was the most we ever got 😂

[@princessketamine0]

@@impulsivepessimist wait which one? I don't remember that

[@annieliina]

@@princessketamine0 i think it was the video where kurtis became a magician

[@princessketamine0]

@@annieliina oh ok, I don't think I ended up watching that one lol so I'll go check it out!

[@KxmpleteKxllapse]

kurtis’s genuine happiness when he was able to get mario up the stairs backwards made me smile 🥺🥺🥺

[@readmycommentnotmyname974]

At least some guy can watch a 36min video essay about how he lost his world record

[@theflyingspaget]

Waiting on the rebuttal where he explains how he won it back

[@emilyb.8219]

"The year's most inspiring story of human perseverance and triumph." - The New York Times

[@EveKarowe]

Idk if a guy came up to me and told me he had a 30 minute record on the water temple I'd be pretty impressed

[@dingodog711]

Same

[@shhtrawberry1809]

Same bro

[@PixelBlue11913]

Same

[@929er13]

i feel like i spend more time taking off the boots and putting them on than doing anything else. 😭

[@kianaamarnani3]

Same 😌

[@lexirosereese6951]

everyones just talking about when he uploaded but can we just talk about how impressive this was and how much dedication this took? im so blown away kurtis, this was a really really entertaining and cool video:) happy extra greeting!

[@KittyKate47]

The fact that he's 5th now is absolutely heart breaking

[@genoswest7253]

The pure joy in his eyes when completing the first Mario glitch was so wholesome and sweet.

[@kailorat]

If someone told me their Ocarina of Time water temple record was 31 minutes, it would be marriage on site.

[@libbythehuman]

RIGHT

[@miaborges3674]

EXACTLY! 😌😌

[@hannabooklover]

I distinctly remember commenting this yesterday and idk if you copied my comment or if we are just crazy in sync, but consider me unsettled.

[@jennatimm7426]

Yeah it took me at least 3 hours. It was one of the first games I played but still...

[@harborbenassa8756]

I think Kurtis had a kirby moment and consumed Conner, so now he bears both of their names

[@serbaneva4737]

Underrated comment

[@kaylafarley167]

My dad LOVED this game on N64 when we were growing up. Whenever he had a long day at the ER he would beg us to play this game with him or he'd kick us off the N64 to play this game with his friend. This is my favorite terrible game to bring out at parties

[@reaganbright3588]

Social psychology fact: if you want to feel better after being sad, it is better to do something you’re bad at rather than something you’re good at, because you will see yourself improve and your emotions will improve with it :) proud of you Kurtis!

[@lrat975]

hi can i have an example? i would love to know how to feel better haha

[@reaganbright3588]

@@lrat975 well it is different for everyone! For example, if you’re good at playing the drums but bad at playing the guitar, using the drums as a form of self-care will not be as effective as using a guitar. In this example, if you already know how to play the drums, there is no room for visible improvement that you can see and feel. However, with playing the guitar, you can learn the chords, how to strum, and different techniques for how to play. Here, you will be able to see and feel and experience something new while becoming better at playing the guitar. The better you get, the more confidence you have in playing, and thus the more confidence you will have in yourself! For me, I’m good at painting but I’m bad at crocheting, so I have been learning how to crochet, and that has really helped to improve my mental health through self-care. I hope this helps!! In everything, you are worthy and you are enough, always. You deserve to love yourself with the same ferocity and beauty that you love others.

[@libbythehuman]

thank you so much for this💕✨💕✨

[@angietorreano7508]

Idk man I know for a fact I’d just start sobbing because I don’t know what I’m doing lmao

[@reaganbright3588]

@@angietorreano7508 it’s definitely a process, for sure! With Kurtis, at one point he became distressed and frustrated with learning something new. Through this, though, he improved and found confidence in himself by getting better at the game. His self-confidence improved with it, and he felt accomplished and proud. Sometimes learning new things can be hard, and if you would need a break, do not deny yourself that. Eventually, with strength and persistence, you could find newer parts of yourself that you wouldn’t have found otherwise. You know yourself the most, so if you decide to give this a go, do it at your own pace!

[@brigidhunter3127]

If Kurtis married his friend Connor his husband would be "Connor Conner"

[@Jvstzn]

Don’t give him ideas

[@ameliairving862]

Nice

[@sonyam6323]

When I was in middle school, one of our trustees was named “Thomas Thomas”. Someone chose to do that to their kid. Imagine.

[@belalima9908]

And that's a reasonable reason to break up with Jenna

[@residententiy]

I literally just thought of that

[@lemoninacoconut6460]

i had a boyfriend on club penguin who lived in turkey (i live in canada), and we genuinely tried to talk everyday for weeks, and then eventually he wasn’t online anymore.. i’ve been looking for him ever since. babe, if ur out there, i miss you 😭

[@pommeno.2785]

Oh god that’s so cute. Do you remember his name?

[@whitneyjameson1849]

Maybe he got grounded?

[@fancythisgirl3]

What was their username?!

[@camrynnelson1386]

go to twitter, they’ll find him in an hour

[@fancythisgirl3]

@@camrynnelson1386 right?

[@dubsinthetubs]

I'm bad at remembering to like videos - I always want to for people whose videos I really enjoy but U often forget probably because of frankly how integrated into my life watching youtube has gotten, it being such a commonplace thing and whatnot. Idk, also to be honest I am drunk. But the fact that you had such a mastery of the water temple in ocarina of time immediately got my like with no questions and I just want to say how much I appreciate that as well as your videos in general and hope things are going well for you on the whole. Keep on keeping on dude

[@Tranzrights]

The fact you didn't speed run cooking mama is insane

[@LannasMissingLink]

Didnt harden animations get the record for that?

[@YourMomsSoHot]

Lanna's Missing Link Jaiden Animations did yeah

[@dingodog711]

@@LannasMissingLink yes Jaiden did

[@SeanMacadelic]

harden animations lol

[@LannasMissingLink]

@@SeanMacadelic lol autocorrect sucks