If Megachurches Were Honest | Honest Ads

There's nothing quite like claiming your tax-free, multi-million dollar enterprise is inspired by an intentionally homeless, apolitical, friend of prostitutes who told religious leaders to pay their dang taxes.
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Roger Horton: Jack Hunter
Writer: Jordan Breeding
Director: Andy Newman
Czar Of Audio-Visual Activities: Dave Brown
Editors: Dave Brown, Jordan Breeding
Sound: Josh Bryant
Pastor Dude: Jordan Breeding
Church Woman: Carly Snowdon
Production Assistants: Caitie Hirabayashi and Naod Haddish
Jordan’s Twitter: / the_j_breeding
Jordan’s KZbin Channel: / @drjordanbreeding
Dave’s Instagram: / deforestbrown
Caitie's Instagram: / caitiehira
00:00 - If Megachurches Were Honest
04:53 - Moves
#MarsHill #Mattchandler #Megachurches

[@TanaMSchiewer]

"We're not your grandma's church" was LITERALLY the catchphrase for a mega church I went to. LOL.

[@monkeybusinessasusuall5467]

I am so sorry you had To go through that

[@lifeandtabroad]

whaaaaaat... lol

[@Lolirock971]

Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins

[@CassiusStelar]

Did your grandma go there? 😶

[@Fritz_Haarmann]

​​@@Lolirock971 Leviticus 25: 44/46 44 “‘Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves. 45 You may also buy some of the temporary residents living among you and members of their clans born in your country, and they will become your property. 46 You can bequeath them to your children as inherited property and can make them slaves for life, but you must not rule over your fellow Israelites ruthlessly.

[@nickm764]

If Megachurches were honest....well....there would be no Megachurches. 😁

[@waynetaylor8082]

Also, their "pastor, minister, rabbi, padre, etc." wouldn't be begging for a larger private jet!

[@smiller2044]

​@@waynetaylor8082have only seen Xian leaders ask for those...

[@muffnman980]

That sentence also works with out the word 'mega' in it

[@peppernsk7726]

The same applies to all religions.

[@focusreaper4685]

Not sure about this. There are plenty of smaller churches that are honest and people appreciate those

[@JustAnotherCO2Emitter]

I lost it at “because we want you to believe our church might have an Asian guy in it somewhere.” 😂

[@Lolirock971]

Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins 😊

[@AJTheInvisibleGirl]

@@Lolirock971Nuh uh

[@koni00004]

​@@AJTheInvisibleGirlrepent

[@louloudaki_]

i was the asian guy in it somewhere but unfortunately i left and the asian representation came with me

[@louloudaki_]

@@Lolirock971cope

[@HylianFox3]

"Don't worry if you don't know the words, there's only about 11 of them per song. And we'll sing them over and over and OVER again until they feel PROFOUND." Spot-on

[@oxymoron02]

The best part was the wrong "your" on-screen. Absolutely on the nail for these sham religious institutes.

[@spotifyseascapessmoothjazz]

Also, every song features the same generic pop chord progressions, nice and easy for the band to play every week.

[@JahJah-CleverHandle]

Not-so fun fact: The songs are actually part of a sort of mind-manipulation to put you into a suggestive state by getting you to stop thinking. I know this sounds crazy, but it’s true.

[@HylianFox3]

@@JahJah-CleverHandle It's not even manipulation, some will flat-out tell you to "shut you mind off" and let the music flow through you.

[@Lolirock971]

Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins 😊

[@Ubylmoen]

You forgot the insanity of having a Christian book store, clothing store, and coffee shop inside the church.

[@Stardweller1]

Why do I suddenly hear a voice saying, “My house is an house of prayer....”?

[@Ubylmoen]

@@Stardweller1 "My house is a house of prayer, and also it is a house that offers large cappucino half price every sunday before 11:00 service."

[@waynelast1685]

What is wrong with that? I think it is great where people associate with like-minded others get to share a treat and buy items that interest them. You are just jaded and hateful.

[@waynelast1685]

@@Ubylmoen Sounds good to me. I love relaxing with a coffee and listening to God's word and associating with like-minded people.

[@Stardweller1]

I think the issue here might be with the fact that once you start selling things in the Church it runs the risk of slowly transforming from a genuine faith to some kind of business. I’m not saying that’s always gonna happen, but I do feel like the risk is there. I mean Jesus wasn't exactly known for being violent when He was here on Earth. Steadfast? Yes. Bold? Yes. Unyielding? Absolutely. Violent? No.... EXCEPT when He saw merchants and money changers conducting business in the Temple. He overthrew their tables, threw their money on the ground, and told them not to make His Father's House "an house of merchandise." That was the one thing that was capable of causing Him to treat people with a degree of violence.

[@toxicpoisn]

How he offended megachurches without offending Christians is golden

[@MrC0MPUT3R]

@Monkey Joe "Scotsman"

[@jonwood6101]

LOL "What ever you have to tell yourself, Joe Dirt"

[@anticarrrot]

"And if any of this sounds personal, don't worry. I'm talking about someone else's glorified book fan club, with a different long history of endorsing, committing, and incouraging unethical behaviour - not your own."

[@viktordoe1636]

@@MrC0MPUT3R Is claming that "Democratic People's Republic of Korea" (also known as north korea) is not a democracy also a Scotsman fallacy? Megachurches are as close to the Christian spirit as North Korea to being a democracy. Although in name both of them imply otherwise.

[@HeyTash]

THIS!

[@jeffkadlec8264]

I am a Christian, I've been to megachurches, and this is ridiculously accurate. Exactly why I DON'T go to megachurches. And that opening was ON-POINT!!

[@derrickenbuenosaires]

He called the first believers a bunch of dumb idiots... hence what you are referring to be

[@dan_zehner]

Same!

[@Campzzyzx]

Says Mega Churches but 100% accurate for the church and the business of religion in general

[@jeffkadlec8264]

@@Campzzyzx I would argue that you've been to the wrong churches. If Christ is proclaimed accurately & truly, none if this applies. Instead, God is glorified, and lives are changed

[@CadillacBunner]

Legit!

[@miaomiaochan]

Joel Osteen wouldn't allow people stranded by flooding from a devastating hurricane to take refuge in his megachurch. Tells me all I need to know about that man.

[@paulydwaboutit4326]

Did you?

[@RemsHusband]

​@@paulydwaboutit4326I can say with complete confidence that OP does not own a mega church capable of providing shelter for thousands of people.

[@ernesthill4017]

According the Houston Chronicle article regarding the matter, Osteen feared storm refugees would trash his church the way they had trashed the New Orleans Superdome during hurricane Katrina . He only relented after public accusations of hypocrisy, but by then, his church had already deservedly suffered a public relations black eye. "Mattress Mac" Jim MacEnvale truly showed the Christian Spirit by opening his warehouses and showrooms during the weather crisis to folks flooded from their homes. He doesn't beat his chest and brag on what a great Christian he is. That's a true example of "What Would Jesus Do?" ❤

[@abbyl1633]

​@@paulydwaboutit4326well Joel sure didn't lmao

[@paulydwaboutit4326]

@@RemsHusband that's irrelevant. They had enough for a few, but did they? You have enough room for a few, did you? Have you ever? So why bash someone for not doing something you yourself didn't do, haven't done, & probably never will do? Seems hypocritical to me

[@SuperlativeCG]

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

[@KrisWustrow]

Deep Thoughts...by Jack Handey.

[@paulinelarson465]

I remember, 60 some years ago, that my mother started taking my sister and me to a larger, different denomination church, because it was "more fashionable". My father never attended ANY church. Suppose he was an agnostic. Mother hasseled him to attend because she thought it made her "look bad" - her husband not attending services. Always admired him for the strength of his convictions.

[@injunsun]

Some places do at least partially define their occupants. Meanwhile, tho someone may be a Christian (or whatever) anywhere, including in a church, one can't ever be a car, anywhere, so this is a false analogy. Going to a place of worship to worship does make you a worshipper; whether you can also do/be a worshipper elsewhere is irrelevant.

[@lordsiomai]

So profound

[@jed-henrywitkowski6470]

Nonsense! I am quite close to turning into a Corvette! Oh, look is that body panel?

[@josemedina9623]

I am really disturbed by how that "love is like water" actually sounded like something they would play in church.

[@GoddessNeith]

my sister's church (a mega-southern baptist one) had a hymn that actually had 15 words in it's entirety. seriously. I started laughing and had to leave.

[@josemedina9623]

@@GoddessNeith Praise Jesus. That’s wrong. lol

[@shugotenchi]

My first thought when the song ended was that I was pretty sure I could hear the lawyers for Hillsong sprinting for their cars. "And maybe a tree?"

[@chocomojo9552]

Really accurate, I could have sworn I already heared it at church!!!

[@therealevilmudbug]

@@josemedina9623 well they sure didn't

[@timothyfinch7295]

That "Love is like water" bit really is how contemporary Christian lyrics are written

[@robbygaume600]

I've got a fugitive cousin living in Brazil (extradition with U.S. ?) making money on this pablum as I type this. The guys always sing in the "whispery-whine" voice too.

[@Lolirock971]

Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins

[@user-co7ue7xx4j]

Make sure that the drums increase in volume every time the beat drops because it needs to be moving

[@ionictheist349]

Christian lyrics👀👀, more of a Protestant lyrics. Be specific on ur words

[@DRYeisleysCreations]

@@ionictheist349 Catholic Lyrics praise Mary 90% of the time

[@Visitor2Earth]

I'm a retired Volunteer Pastor (I took NO money from the churches I served...I worked a full time job to support my pastorate), and this is extremely accurate. Megachurches, and even most small churches, are somewhat like this. The stench of the "modern" Church was so bad, for me, that I gave up on organized religion in 2006, after having served congregations for about 30 years.

[@memeboi6017]

Go to a traditional Lutheran church, none of this dumb modern stuff, and a true gospel being preached.

[@skylark7921]

@@memeboi6017honestly Catholic Churches (at least the ones I’ve been to) are pretty good too as far as being the exact opposite of most everything in this video. Unfortunately the unchecked child abuse kind of ruins everything….

[@TheFrostyPhoenix-III]

Go to an Orthodox Church, that is the true traditional church of Jesus

[@michaeldavidson6903]

​@@skylark7921 The sexual abuse in the Catholic Church peaked between the 1960s and 1980s, and has dramatically dropped since then. Most cases of abuse you hear about are from that time period. I'm not making excuses or denying the actions of the clergy, which are very real and very heinous, but there have been various measures taken by the Church to correct the problem. For instance, in 2002 the USCCB instituted mandatory reporting guidelines and safe environment policies, and Pope Francis has done multiple things throughout his pontificate to crack down on abuse and cover up, so I don't think it's fair to say that the abuse has been totally unchecked. Also, clerical abuse isn't a strictly Catholic problem. There are more abuse allegations against protestant ministers per year than there are against Catholic priests.

[@easternrebel1061]

I'm truly sorry to hear that, but honestly I can't blame you. I almost did the same until I found a decent pentecostal church near me. Not very big, and for the first time ever I felt like I was genuinely accepted. I'm 22 a d this happened when I was 19, so for 19 years I went to all kinds of churches, big and small , Romanian, American, you name it , and I just never felt like I had a place there until this one.

[@MisterGoodDad]

"Fronted by failed musicians" - holy shit that was soooooo on point. EDIT: Thank you for the likes, Yum Yum Yummy

[@BlessedAreTheCheesemakers]

spoiler alert: all these people died of Covid

[@garygrinkevich6971]

Absolutely savage i quit church band after i learned how to play a scale.. Can't stand the sound of an open G chord anymore...

[@AF_1892]

No joke. I need earplugs to go to my parents church. Most ppl there are really deaf. The drum player is behind plexiglass to not make it so loud.

[@joyphillips1821]

Or vice versa... like Katy Perry

[@pauldacon828]

Christian rock bands are the religious version of Smosh on KZbin.

[@ThaMaven]

It's refreshing to see Roger back.

[@sethhereford7332]

No kidding, these were missed

[@drago1149]

I thought he was dead

[@SeektheLordsface]

Selah Luke 11:2-4 And he said unto them, When ye pray, say, Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, as in heaven, so in earth.Give us day by day our daily bread.And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil./Inspiration+There is much we could say about this model prayer of our Lord, which will help us to pray aright. But notice the last line, "lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil." Here, it seems God's "providential leading" is in view, not "instructional leading," for we would not say "God, don't instruct me to go where I will be tempted." Obviously, God would not do that anyway, and it would be an insult to pray that to Him. Instead, we pray "God, please so order events in my life that I fall not into temptation and into the snare of the evil one (Satan)." /Prayer+O God, you are the Ruler of all history and of my life too. Man thinks himself the "master of his own fate, the captain of his soul," but in truth, you rule over all. I have no right to demand tempting situations should not arise, but knowing my own weakness, I pray you will guard my steps and help me to avoid tempting situations. And if one cannot be avoided or you send it as a test, I pray I may overcome my adversary the devil, in the mighty name Jesus Christ Amen.

[@veemon9280]

The king is back

[@barbarakilman271]

I agree

[@aaronTGP_3756]

Extra stuff left out: -Your donations will bless YOU, so when something bad is happening, that means more donations (wait, what is prayer again?) -The healings are sometimes for real sick people, but they are tricked into thinking they are healed (one person was "healed" from being unable to walk, walked for a bit, but after the service, they found themselves back on the wheelchair)

[@leyrua]

Yep. Adrenaline is a powerful thing in the short-term, but when it wears off... 😢

[@Lolirock971]

​@@leyruaand Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins 😊

[@seaotter4439]

It's indulgences all over again

[@LineOfThy]

People forget why Protestants exist

[@impracticalPhysics]

@@Lolirock971 oh, the part where it says "Thou shalt not explain miraculous healings"

[@actj700]

I went to my father's church several weeks ago and I. AM. LIVING. FOR. THIS. When they started talking about the rock band singing songs with only five or so words I SCREAMED. There was an entire song (that went on for 23 minutes - I timed it) where all they kept saying over and over was "jesus banish the darkness" This. Is. Amazing.

[@snowrocket]

I would never go back there.

[@impracticalPhysics]

Oof, you had it bad. A church I went to last month sang "Holy holy holy, holy is the Lord" for 7 minutes.(I timed) and yes, there were lyrics projected onto the wall behind the band.

[@janklowicz24]

"we're just gonna do whatever sounds ...probably Christian." Joel Osteen: "Hey, get your own scam!"

[@msjkramey]

Huh... it's almost like he was calling him out or something. Who woulda thunk it?

[@Cornerstanding]

Olsteen/ Osteen he had an L in his name.

[@injunsun]

@@Cornerstanding Nope.

[@craigward7691]

legendary comment

[@roberthofmann8403]

@@Cornerstanding I think you are a victim of the Mandela Effect.

[@smflatt]

This is a pretty accurate depiction of today's heretical megachurch.

[@tylersoto7465]

Even as a Christian this accurate and hate to see people get stuck in these churches

[@charlestownsend9280]

Not even mega churches, plenty of regular churches do a lot of the stuff mentioned, not all of it and not as greedy but non mega churches aren't sinless either.

[@juleneyoung5053]

Tithe is yearly !! how would the churches survive on that hahaha. Gifting is when ever you visit/attend church

[@smflatt]

@@juleneyoung5053 You're forgetting the context. This was in ancient Israel and the church was the government..A theocracy. Producers of food gave of their yearly harvest, it's true. But the people in town, who were paid with currency, had to pay the temple tax of around, I'm pretty sure, 24%. I don't consider myself so special that I’m a gift when I walk through the doors of my church, as you seem to suggest. Rather, whatever or however you feel moved to give is your gift...or offering.

[@stuartemmanuel3735]

American megachurches not my church , I'm in a real authentic Christlike Megachurch and the scriptures is what we take seriously and biblically sound.

[@TiktokBurnedMyCrops]

Went to a ‘smaller’ megachurch growing up. Wasn’t like a football stadium, more like a big office building with enough flashing lights to give a herd of elephants a seizure and a movie screen bigger than the local theater. I used to hide out in the bathroom when they brought the rock band out because it was incredibly overwhelming and loud for me. We left after it turned out they’d secretly hired a convicted child molester who preyed on his own daughter, claiming that they ‘just didn’t allow him near the children.’ My last memory of it was a full on protest going on outside of the church over it. There wasn’t much in the way of Christian education, more like activities centered around well known bible stories, so I’d gotten bored anyway since nobody could seem to answer my more in depth questions about the faith and went looking for other things.

[@PaulodeMelo]

Any more complicated questions deserve the perfect generic answer: God works in mysterious ways.

[@TiktokBurnedMyCrops]

@@trevrockrock16 Yes, actually. I’m planning on minoring in theology and I’m converting to Judaism. I have a healthy respect for various faiths now because I’ve spent a lot of time learning about them and listening to different opinions and theories.

[@cool06alt]

@@TiktokBurnedMyCrops So I take you have jewish ancestry for that to happen? How about some of gentiles? What's ur recomendation?

[@TiktokBurnedMyCrops]

@@cool06alt No Jews in my lineage, but there doesn’t have to be for conversion. If you believe in G-d, the torah, and are willing to take on the 613 mitzvot, then the next step is to find a Rabbi who will lead you through the process. Afterwards you are considered as Jewish as someone who was born into the faith. It’s a LOT of work to take on the commandments, too much for most, which is why proselytizing is forbidden.

[@Rightly_Divided]

@@cool06alt I think reading the Bible would be a good start. Starting with verses that are relevant to our time frame or dispensation. Maybe start with, Romans 3:23-24 KJV to see we all live with the same issues. Then read 1 Corinthians 15 1-4 KJV to see what the gospel says and how to be saved. Then read John 3:16 KJV. After that read Colossians 2:13 KJV Then perhaps read Romans 3:10-18 KJV to see who God declares good. 1 John 1:8-10 is a good one. 2 Timothy 3:1-5 KJV shows us where we are today. You see. The Torah is only part of God's story. The new testament is there for a reason. When Jesus was preaching on earth he was actually preaching to Jews. Not gentiles. But because Jewish people rejected Jesus as their messiah, Jesus sent a revelation to Paul who preached a message to the gentiles that faith on the blood of Jesus and what Jesus did and a belief on him is the way to salvation. That salvation is eternal and can't be taken back. It is a free gift and requires no works and just a belief.

[@enfys6493]

If megachurches were honest that would be a real miracle.

[@linkthehero8431]

Very true.

[@rarescevei8268]

They wouldnt exist if they were honest

[@karendiane9154]

I agree with you 100%.

[@holoceph3916]

“It’s just business” lol

[@willisskull2676]

These are legitimate criticisms of many churches, not an attack on the religion itself. It's only targeting the ones that do this. If your church actually does care about helping people and puts its members before profit, you've got nothing to worry about. If anyone feels attacked by this, may I suggest a closer examination of your church? The bland music, lack of reading from the Bible, putting material wealth before well being, these are legit concerns I have seen at many churches. It's painfully accurate. Well done as always, Horton.

[@eaglesmight8321]

Well said.

[@michaelbrownlee4857]

"Church house"* We are the church If your born again!

[@AnOriginalYouTuber]

Living a peaceful, humble, fulfilling, "love your neighbor" life. I wish these mega churches would teach this more. The congregation I attend is small, 100% volunteer, and avoids politics. We teach that every person is precious. Thus, we all feel safe to be vulnerable and honest and supportive without prejudices. Its wonderful!

[@grizzlycharizard0017]

But all Religion did is killed and controlled people throughout history. How can you even say that?

[@alexiswelsh5821]

Also Isaiah 58:7 - 10 plainly says to help the poor by sharing what you have, and to not be a lying oppressor.

[@kialuvsyoo]

"As long as there's not an ongoing national crisis" *Joel Osteen has left the chat*

[@chriskwakernaat2328]

ikr , i lolled at that part

[@snuggleskunk4711]

LOL 🤣👍

[@Badbirdie]

Dude, we don't use napalm in warfare.

[@ReligionAndMaterialismDebunked]

Noah's Ark is a really fucking stupid story. 😂 Flood stories in mythology are nothing new. The oldest flood myth story known is the Epic Poem of Gilgamesh. 1) Impossible story - Hawaii had rain for longer and no flood. That was from August 30th, 1993 to August 27th, 1994. That's 247 days compared to "40 days and 40 nights". No trace of evidence in mountains for this "global" flood in mountains and so forth by archaeology. Cultures existed during this time (like no culture recorded a moon splitting in two by "Prophet" Muhammad). Sloths come from the Americas and sleep all but 4 hours a day. So much for walking all that time and then crossing a giant ocean without boats. Kangaroos? Crossing waters. Dinosaurs that are millions of years old but humans are only hundreds of thousands of years old. How did the Bible say firstly that animals were made first and then humans and then later says humans were made first and then animals (contradicts itself). If the second claim is the one they're sticking with, then impossible. Humans are like 250k or so years old. Dinosaurs go back millions upon millions upon millions ago. The t-rex and a handful of dinosaurs would probably make humans go extinct. Satan (who is rebranded in Christianity) put the dinosaur bones to trick us? Free dating is very accurate and we have trees dating millions of years old. So the trees are older than an acclaimed 10k year or younger earth (dating by an age of 1 day equating to 1000 years), how? Did the trees get magically placed here? How come trees weren't mentioned to magically go here? The boat size cannot hold millions and it was smaller than the Titanic. Enough food and water? All that poop and pee? What humans are left and why do so many cultures exist? A Sumerian boat (for the oldest spiritual writing known as The Epic Poem of Gilgamesh) was made and found to be more sturdy of design than Noah's Ark. In recent (2021) mainstream news, the Noah's Ark replica is unfit for voyage even though it was made exactly as described in the Bible and it has no damages to it. There's even a finish location for "Noah's Ark" in the Bible but no boat was ever found. The Creation "Museum" of Ken Ham has loads of unscientific and unhistorical claims. Christians even applauded and were shown visually in the crowd to be intrigued by Bill Nye (who isn't a scientist). Furthermore, on a major Christian website, Bill Nye got 93% of the votes for a poll asking who was the winner of the "debate". Bill Nye even missed a handful of explanations and still did a wonderful job at wrecking Ken Ham. 2) Why not just take away free will. They're gonna do it all over again. 3) It was a part of your plan to begin with. 4) You know the future and again, it was a part of your plan. You're everywhere and hear all thoughts so prayer is just begging. 5) Should have just killed everyone and left it at that. 6) No evidence for Noah's Ark itself. 7) Most of the Bible is proven bullshit anyways (history, science, self contradictions, unoriginal content, mistranslations, many versions, misinterpretations, forgeries, missing books, etc.). Most Jews like myself (I'm mixed) aren't religious. Einstein, Sagan, Daniel Radcliffe, and many other Jews weren't/aren't religious. Many of the religious ones admit to doing parts for cultural reasons but admit to not actually believing in it. Thankfully, much of the religions are illegal or at least not tolerated well since (Old and New Testament) pushes slavery, sexism, racism, genocide, homicide, animal abuse, etc. Furthermore, because I say that the god of Abraham is bullshit, doesn't mean I say there's no god or no spirit. It doesn't mean I accept Hinduism either, as there's plenty of bullshit there too. #Agnostic #FreeThinker #AntiTheist #Spiritual #IANDS #MonroeInstitute

[@ReligionAndMaterialismDebunked]

Well "Satan" isn't even a fallen angel, in the sense of falling from grace. In the story of Jewish religion, ha'satan/satan, was not even a proper noun. Satan was first a verb, an idea. Later turned into a consciousness, but not a deity. He was designed to tempt people. You can clearly see such occurrences with Yahweh making a bet with Satan in one story and in other instances where Yahweh doesn't want to change Satan's ways. Christians rebranded Satan (like they did for a bunch of things) and then later on even some of them even pushed a non Jewish hell. Hell, which isn't in Jewish faith, and it is a mistranslation of 4 words (3 Greek words and 1 Jewish word). It comes from a self titled fiction called Dante's Inferno, of the Paradise Lost series. Lucifer just means light bearer in Latin and isn't tied to Satan. Even the fake unoriginal misinterpreted "Jesus" (Greek name and J doesn't exist in Hebrew) called himself Lucifer, light bearer. And then what about just blaming former abuses, brainwashing, the fake and very profitable drug "war", and evil forces instead of a person (who supposedly is under the control of "Satan" and is hurting).

[@TheSeptemberRose]

That's so accurate! I was brainwashed in my late teens and I got taken to a couple "Mega churches" and it was a lot like this. They gave you pre-printed envelopes for your tithes and offerings. This was in Canada, but when I lived in the States for a year, I saw the extreme wealth of the mega churches and the expensive, custom clothing and jewellery the preachers were wearing and I was thoroughly disgusted.

[@memeboi6017]

I would recommend turning to some form of traditional, liturgical Christianity, the kinda without mega churches (like Lutherans and Presbyterians).

[@Lolirock971]

​@@memeboi6017and Leviticus 11 Exodus 20 please repent from sins 😊

[@memeboi6017]

@@Lolirock971 1. I do. 2.Citing the Laws regarding Kosher food and the 10 commandments in no way makes what i say incorrect. Fact of the matter is that consuming non kosher food is not a sin at all (see acts 10 & 11)

[@jenniferhiemstra5228]

@@memeboi6017 THIS! I always feel like I'm the only one who sees the irony that the more traditional/liturgical churches, primarily Mainline, have more progressive values and are more willing to learn about things outside of their usual scope, but the modern, 'non denominational, churches? Forget about it. They're unwilling to learn new things, anything/anyone different than them is 'evil', etc. I wanna thank you in this cyber space, because it makes me feel less alone...

[@simpleanswer8954]

@@memeboi6017 So your suggestion is he go elsewhere for a different form of brainwashing?

[@zeketaton5560]

"If you visit... You're basically a missionary!!" LMAOOOO😂😂

[@larrydickman5936]

" I'm healed from my non specific illness " That had me almost in tears !

[@bdpv025]

😂

[@Nyotasu]

He healed me from gayness praise jesus

[@goinggoinggone535]

@@Nyotasu Praise Jebis

[@mr.commonsense]

Jesus turned me gay, but now that I gave my child alcohol, I passed the gay onto god

[@jerrimenard3092]

Cold reading is what it's called on the carnival circuit. If everyone in the room is over 50, you can be someone has heart problems, a bum knee, digestive troubles ECT. This is how they did fake cure selling in the 1800's. Now,the church has vitamins, special oils and holy cornmeal for sale. All that's missing is the top hat.

[@flightmasterr231]

Loved the line about ignoring thousands of years of theology and study to go with whatever feels right

[@techpriest6962]

More if less modern christianity: - Go to Church? Nahhhh I'm lazy - Spread the Word? Nahhh that's embarrassing - Know anything about the Bible? Nahh, you just need to accept jesus. - Pray? Nahh, only when I need something. As an atheist, nothing disgusts me more than hypocrites. Most christians these days are christian in name only.

[@charlestownsend9280]

The only detail missed out is the actual psychological manipulation used by worship bands to induce a state of mind susceptible to "religious experiences". They're an easily repeatable trick, not some grand spiritual experience. You can also create such experiences in a lab by simulating specific areas of the brain, which is interesting. Look it up if you don't believe me, but most worship bands use the same technique in order to get results and induce experiences. It's all to do with the specific pattern of music and it's very interesting from a psychology perspective, slightly evil from the perspective that a large number of churches are using it to manipulate people into thinking that they've met god. This isn't just a mega church thing though, it's in a lot of other churches as well.

[@jengsci8268]

charles townsend - Why do you think they refer to the congregation as their flock. Sheep to get fleeced. Not all churches have this motive though.

[@biosaari]

You can stimulate anything in the brain, ala Matrix. This doesn't discount the real experience of falling in love.

[@MarxIsDeadAndRotting]

It is a state called alpha.

[@playdiscgolf1546]

@@jengsci8268 I grew up in churches and church as a part of the praise team for a few years, when he said the “church rock band…I mean worship team of failed musicians” I laughed out loud at how true that is…the repeating lyrics thing reminds me a lot of the “vain repetition” Jesus told us NOT to do!

[@DemonicAdj]

​@@jengsci8268Oh, sheep get a lot more than "fleeced" by some of these types.

[@justincarawan-carawanco.pu1639]

As a Christian, I find this insulting, terrifying, and hilarious all at the same time!

[@johnnyrvf]

Yes but true. Why are you insulted by the truth? Do you really believe that these ersatz businesses promote Christ? Be careful of being perturbed by falsehoods. Telling the truth is not blasphemy.

[@justincarawan-carawanco.pu1639]

@@johnnyrvf No no no, you misunderstand. I attend a regular church. I'm insulted that any establishment claiming to be a church would actually do these things!

[@DCronk-qc6sn]

That sounds about right - an apt description. Apologists are some of the finest comedians working today - it's all a joke.

[@groomporter9714]

Best comment.

[@Herowebcomics]

I agree! When people get it wrong,that sucks,but when people like this actually believe what they say and try to help others,it is awesome!

[@jed-henrywitkowski6470]

As a former member of a small-town church, where the pastor drove a school bus for a living, I am wholly... not offended.

[@sarahgowon7258]

bless him!

[@josephcronin4209]

And this is the type of church people should support .

[@Mykee3d]

As a school bus driver who has served as a pastor, I am also wholly not offended, and very encouraged by your comment. Thank you for posting.

[@withlessAsbestos]

I like how this isn’t disrespectful to actual Christians but specifically satirizing mega churches.

[@circusninja]

As a church guy, I agree.

[@toAdmiller]

@Jason Bonaparte Now if we can only come together and end religious faith of all kinds forever...

[@vincentlee7359]

@Jason Bonaparte *MAGA Churches

[@withlessAsbestos]

@@amberridenhour1411 when are fairies or beard men mentioned in the Bible?

[@LeSpeederus]

@@amberridenhour1411 Don't be that guy

[@ZeraSeraphim]

The problem with Megachurches is the same problem that is present in modern video gaming, politics, medical advances, even FOOD. It's easier and simpler to rely on people who will give you the benefit of the doubt, are hoping for some deeper meaning, or are just plain stupid, and trick them into thinking your shitty product, service or representation is worth more than it actually is. The people who market their own Godliness, and a community "where you will belong" are the same types of people who would hype up a video game beyond all belief only to refuse refunds when it doesn't deliver on half as what is promised. Those kinds of people are also the same ones who would work on a campaign for a scumbag politician promising that the country will improve under his leadership immediately, only to later discover that you're paying twice for gas and eggs what you were a few years ago, and he's on a fucking yacht doing hookers and blow. It's all a scam, all of it, and the biggest scam they ever pulled is making us thinking we need community leaders, politicians, and heads of industry who act like this in order for our society to function instead of kicking them the fuck out like we should have ages ago.

[@snowrocket]

God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are really, really great (the understatement of the century). Some people claiming to explain them or represent them are assholes, liars, and criminals. Often your best bet is the small regular looking church with 50-300 people who DON'T broadcast on TV or radio.

[@Nate-bn5kk]

It all boils down to money... The love of money is the root of all evil.

[@snowrocket]

@@Nate-bn5kk I don't know if it's ALL about money, but a decent (indecent?) chunk of it is. Throw "power" and "control" in there and you probably have most of it. It's amazing to me how many people "forget"(?) or just don't know about that FIRST part:" The LOVE of money..." . Money itself is NOT the problem, it's the improper DESIRE for it and how you USE that desire that is the problem. That's what often turns good people or institutions bad, whether it's a church, a business, or a government.

[@Nate-bn5kk]

@@snowrocket Amen I agree, money itself isn't evil, the love of it leads to evil. What is the foundation of power, what are the pillars and driving force for corrupt power?: Money. It always involves greed for more money.

[@theyearwas1473]

"jesus your love is like water, love is like water". That nailed the mega church music down hard.

[@holoceph3916]

And at MC’s that’ll be $9.99 for water sir

[@thandoq]

As a Christian and ex-Megachurch member I hate how accurate and funny this is😂

[@rebeccaoprea9917]

Same . Many are heading out the door .

[@astyag8627]

Funny? I don't think brainwashing is funny, what all religions do is scary. You live once, and they take it away from you.

[@jonathanconnor7920]

@@astyag8627 indeed. Especially the fact that they bring children to those places, that's the real tragedy. If all children were taught science so they'd know how to actually go about finding the answers to their questions, and _NOT_ exposed to religion until their brains were fully developed to a point where they have the maturity to decide for themselves (at least 18-years-old), then very, _very_ few of them would believe all that superstitious nonsense. It makes me sick to see children indoctrinated with beliefs that encourage them to abandon critical-thinking and logic in favor of _"don't ever question this belief. Don't be yourself, be what the god in this book tells you to be. And when things don't add up or make sense, just blindly have faith. And if none of that works for you, it's your fault; you must not be praying hard enough."_ The church knows if it doesn't get 'em young, soon enough they won't have enough believers to fill up those massive buildings. Which means they'll no longer have money and power.

[@mmangalisoluyandangcobo8426]

Hahaha seriously

[@gabrieljordan8015]

@@jonathanconnor7920 I agree. It's such an insane amount of brain washing and corruption right in front of us and realistically there doesn't seem to be a damn thing we can do about it.

[@Socasmx]

"We sure aren't perfect but sure expect you to be." Oh, the burn.

[@melindazarkltd8551]

Oh the burn?? The joke doesn't even make sense. Megachurches are all about accepting everyone and everything. Interesting to see the Catholics are making their own propaganda these days to counter the megachurch propaganda we had to deal with in the 80s. The tip off is the accusation about masks. This video is just more liberal preening.

[@BC-wj8fx]

​@@melindazarkltd8551 The joke hits a a home run for those who've experienced spiritually abusive 'churches'. Megachurches are not "all" about anything. Each one is different. Some are about cult culture and abusive narcissistic-psychopathic control. For this goal they brainwash the attendees into accepting that their leadership is divine, annointed, and cannott be questioned (akin to opposing God), and they keep 'sin lists' and use 'breaking sessions', malicious false gossip, and a perverse ring of 'Flying Monkeys' (sycophants, other narcissistic-psychopaths and antisocials, who do their wicked bidding in the hopes of gaining favour and a position of control) to bully and ostricise those who raise a concern about the bullying or abuse-of-position or brainwashing or otherwise un-Biblical behaviour that they've noticed. I started to notice that the only people a 30's 'pastor' would 'trust' and connect with, were the least-Christian behaving, most personality-disordered, most narcissistic, most hateful, most bullying, most discouraging of Christian ways, least referencing of Jesus and His teachings, least loving, least accepting, most passive-aggressive, most self-serving etc. One of them whom the 'pastor' socialised with in private, called prophecy "Christian bull****" and promised to punch the church member next time they saw them, for asking if they would like an encouraging prophecy. The 'pastor' who is a close associate of this sociopath, is also in charge of the 30-year-olds connect group, which is advertised as "to connect and encourage". When this 'pastor' was alerted to the sociopath's bullying anti-Christian behaviour, in private, the group 'pastor' ingored it. When it was then again raised in public on the 'church' community group online, the 'pastor' deleted and blocked the poster, and did not address the bullying issue - as if to deliberately conceal sociopathic anti-Christian behaviour. Suggested read: "Let Us Prey: The Plague of Narcissist Pastors and what We Can Do about it" by Darrell Puls and R. Glenn Ball. Or TLDR - look up websites for "signs of spiritually abusive churches". This video, pretty much every point raised, I could tick off. Including the "before tax" added on to tithing. They talk about giving them money every 2nd Sunday. But when I asked the bullying 'pastor' for a blessing for my new job, as I'd been very underpaid for the last 8 years, the bullying 'pastor' ignored the request, but then went on a year+ campaign of ramping up the bullying, telling their rotten associates to bully me, and collude to commit false witness to increase the bullying (which, being narcissists and sociopaths, not God-fearing Christians, they had no objection to doing).

[@stijnvdv2]

actually I'm an Optometrist.... those masks.... yeah that's just a bunch of nonsense; every medical from a doctor to a paramedic KNOWS it's complete bullshit; it's only done coz of government mandate.

[@izzystar5904]

My parents church is currently trying to keep another couple's loveless marriage together because they say that divorce is 'ungodly'

[@melindazarkltd8551]

@@stijnvdv2 Yeah I think the rest of these people have completely missed my point

[@fosterfuchs]

Two red flags for megachurches: When you pull up their website, the senior minister is featured on the homepage, rather than the church Said senior minister is living in a compound that is paid for through his book sales, not any donations. Which somehow makes this OK.

[@JahJah-CleverHandle]

My father and my mother spent a good several years finding a good church, which ended them up in all sorts of shady churches, even a cult at one point. My dad studied Neurolinguistics before coming to faith, and was (and still is) technically qualified as a hypnotist. During his studies, he learned about how the megachurches actually use the 11 words songs to put you into a suggestive state. It’s more complicated than simply that, but yeah, the megachurches are out to get your money, not to save you.

[@amabiliabernardo372]

NAHHH BRO I GET THAT😭😭😭😭

[@dw3403]

I know it sounds crazy but we are being brain washed daily by outer circumstances. Commercials are bombarding us with you need this to be happy for one example. So yes the songs were supposed to hypnotise. But what was the message? And mega churches dont seem to glorify God but the pastor alone.

[@amabiliabernardo372]

@dw3403 fr tho this is why I love little Christian community's church's of 70 people or less

[@dw3403]

@@amabiliabernardo372 And that was what the first churches were all about. A little haven/community within a cold uncaring world. Where they were to love one another even as christ loved us. Care for each other, support each other emotionally and financially when in need. A new family of sorts.

[@amabiliabernardo372]

@dw3403 YES I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THOSE TYPES OF CHURCHES not the mega chrurchs or the ones who just do it for money

[@seanentzel9616]

"Jesus Christ will you shut the hell up! I'm making a commercial for GOD!" Perfection

[@cantweallplaynice3912]

I'm Christian and even I can laugh at this

[@jennaeisel9072]

Most accurate 10 seconds of this video!

[@ballard1639]

@@cantweallplaynice3912 You should not laugh to this you should tell him to repent. I'm telling him now Repent

[@Man-lw1vp]

@@cantweallplaynice3912 how?

[@cantweallplaynice3912]

@@Man-lw1vp because it's the truth about these big churches

[@JustWhyFFS]

"Our doors are open to everybody, as long as there's not an ongoing national emergency." Looking at you Joel Osteen.

[@voodooprincess11]

Persecution of Christians isn’t cute. Separation of Church and State, bi***es!

[@whatsawhizzerwebnovels4927]

You got to love how he condemns them for closing during a pandemic and then accuses them of not wearing masks during a pandemic in the same breath.

[@crissysims4357]

Priest and the 80 people inside my local church were all fined $5000 each ! But in a tight city like Melbourne in Australia and during a short heavy lockdown period. How is that not fair apart from the fines that should only be $50, not hundreds and thousands. But why is that unfair? I shouldn't be asking since i started avoiding ALL news in order to not hear any political news, but this comment sparked my interest

[@daniellimo4087]

Am a Christian but nearly fell off my chair laughing.

[@izakblanchette5155]

Bruh, shots fired haha 😂😂😂

[@wfs4227]

2:40-2:43 😂 That song is so accurate. I really wish dome churches would stop letting this fly.

[@DK-oy6ee]

This guy is great. So refreshing to see an American with a great sense of sarcastic humour

[@michaelsmith3901]

They could have mocked megachurches with a lot of exaggerated BS but this is pretty much on point.

[@IsaacWolfOfficial]

When the exaggerated BS is only the tip of the iceberg 😬

[@nobody8328]

There's no need to exaggerate.

[@waynelast1685]

no, its almost entirely BS. Nice try.

[@thekaibosh]

​@@waynelast1685 Which parts are BS? Scandal/Abuse: Mark Driscoll(abusive leadership), Brian Houston (concealing child abuse), Carl Lentz(adultry), John Gray(adultry), Ravi Zacharias (sex abuse) Repetitive worship songs: The Blessing, Surrounded, King of My Heart, Oceans Abandoning Traditions/Theology: Steven Furtick, Joel Osteen, Bill Johnson 2nd Amendment/America Worship: Kenneth Copeland, Paula White, Kat Kerr, Jeremiah Johnson 10% minimum, before Taxes: Furtick, Robert Morris, TD Jakes, Copeland, Jesse Duplantis Fake Healing: Benny Hinn, Kenneth Copeland, Todd White, Bill Johnson Saved from not having enough money: TD Jakes, Kenneth Copeland, Robert Morris, Joel Osteen Abandoning Bible for Pastor Books: Best Life Now, The Blessed Life, The Prayer of Jabez, The Physics of Heaven, Sun Stand still Obnoxiously Expensive Clothing: Furtick, Gray, Mike Todd, TD Jakes, David Crank

[@heyokaikaggen6288]

@@thekaibosh so many sins, so little time...

[@5pctLowBattery]

Joel Osteen isn’t going to like this. Driving his $325,000 Ferrari while qualifying for $4,400,000 PPP loan.

[@kingasasin177]

He literally shut his church during Hurricane Harvey when people were looking for shelter and a safe place and didn’t open the doors till a ton of people were complaining

[@skwills1629]

@@kingasasin177 - His Reason was it';d mess the Place up. Which Kind of Missed the Ppint of it being an Emergency.

[@customfantasyhotwheels]

Meanwhile, Mattress Mac OPENED his Gallery Furniture showroom and allowed anyone who was stranded without a home because of the flooding to take shelter until those people would find somewhere to stay. He did not rush anyone out of the showroom after the hurricane passed.

[@XXXTentaclez]

Reply to me about fraud and church to come out of the closet then show your family *edit: how did it go?*

[@skwills1629]

@@XXXTentaclez - I don;t see why This has anything to do with Gods existence. You';ll find God is not dependent on Man to Exist. Also, there are Scam Artists everywhere, but not all Clergy are this way.

[@niradnagrom2356]

This is hilarious! Great job! Hearing you say; "Fly ass shoes" was funny AF!

[@rahadigitalmedia2479]

My dude said, "overlayed with the image of a torture device that ancient Romans used to kill criminals." 😂😂😂 The accuracy and irony is soooo amazing, we've immortalized a torture, killing device as a symbol of faith somehow

[@earthjustice01]

The comedian Lenny Bruce once riffed on the idea: what if jesus had been electrocuted. People would have little chairs on a necklace, and churches would have a chair on top of their building.

[@HeronCoyote1234]

I was always confused about why a crucifix is used as a holy symbol. I would think Jesus would want that to be the LAST thing to symbolize him. Talk about triggering PTSD.

[@earthjustice01]

@@HeronCoyote1234 you're making a good point, because really, it's not about Jesus, it's about how his followers were not cheated by his death, but vindicated by his resurrection. lt's kind of thumbing their noses at the Roman Empire, it's saying "You thought you were getting rid of this movement, but it's come back to haunt you big time. I think that was the mindset that led to the cross being considered holy.

[@HeronCoyote1234]

@@earthjustice01 thank you.

[@TiktokBurnedMyCrops]

That’s why some denominations don’t display the cross much

[@RobertEOSpeedwagon]

"Jesus, your love is like water Love is like water Love is like water" Hillsong: *WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN*

[@stratecaster547]

Chorus: "Whoaoaoaaaaaaaoaohhh"

[@siphindiwezungu6617]

@@stratecaster547 Could you kindly stop being this accurate

[@stratecaster547]

@@siphindiwezungu6617 youre talking to a guy who grew up in a non denominational church and played guitar on the praise and worship team during the mid 2000s: guess which single band gave us literally HALF our songlist rotation

[@daquavious1517]

This is why that kind of music started dying of in the mid 2010s.

[@kushalthapa5177]

And maybe a tree.

[@MrHumpah12]

I'm a Christian and this is hilarious and heartbreakingly accurate about cultural churches

[@waynelast1685]

I doubt you are a Christian. most of the video is BS.

[@MrHumpah12]

@@waynelast1685 good thing my salvation is not dependant on you, but rather the precious blood of Christ. do you attend a mega church? Lol

[@waynelast1685]

@@MrHumpah12 you're right. Good thing it is not dependent on me. But I can believe your ignorance ( not meaning to be mean but just the real sense of the word) . Almost the entire video is taking everything out of context so it is hard for me to believe you. Almost every church has some aspects similar to the mega churches unless you are talking about ultra conservative churches 50 years ago.

[@MrHumpah12]

@@waynelast1685 out of context? Mega churches are masters of taking scripture out of context. Also what common link do they have? Jesus being the son of God and his blood saves. That is the most important factor for salvation but I tend to get a Santa Clause picture of God from mega churches and even a lot of "conservative churches" you speak of. I'm sorry you disagree with my stance and don't really know me or my relationship with Christ. If you are puzzled or doubtful, I'd love to answer any questions you have

[@waynelast1685]

@@MrHumpah12 I can understand what you are saying but I would disagree, I can respond more tomorrow after I get some sleep.

[@jacobc9221]

If the devil is real, he's the one running all the megachurches.

[@donnieburgess]

I've been trolling around on KZbin for more than a decade (probably 2 decades, but I can't remember exactly when KZbin became a thing), and this is literally the first channel I have ever hit the "subscribe" button for... His voice is my voice (with better production and a larger audience). I love these videos!

[@makesu_]

When I see his face, I smile. He's Roger by the way

[@mathiaschwan9882]

what would you do if he was your dad

[@oluwatobiaikomo2848]

Wrong! He's Brother Roger. Bless you.

[@vanceamania]

Same

[@jiukumite]

I still love his "Cell phone games" video!

[@YodaMan.]

@@mathiaschwan9882 i wish he was my daddy.

[@gimpinmypants]

Roger for president. He’ll tell you the horrible truth with a winning smile.

[@patrickmoffatt4698]

We tried that, people don't like mean tweets.... They'd rather have indecipable gibberish.

[@btaylor545]

@@patrickmoffatt4698 yea he said tell the horrible truth not lie until your people believe the lie to be true. Big difference!

[@sapper72783]

You can't speak the truth as president you'll be smoked from a high rise window

[@hanniballecter7103]

Roger for World domination.

[@h2ojr1]

wait a second....i've seen this episode

[@jayso538]

This is so accurate is hilarious, sad and terrifying at the same time

[@joshmiller8738]

So much of this isn't just true of the mega churches. Grew up in a bunch of small churches with similar mentalities....or worse in some regard. But this highlights pretty much every reason I haven't been to a church for a few years now.

[@jenniferhiemstra5228]

Sure, but he's referring to mega churches, not small ones. By no means is he suggesting that it's exclusive to mega churches, but I haven't' come across a mega church where any of this ISN'T true. Small churches at least run the gamut of these bullet points.

[@stevenrwilson181]

💯 agree

[@maurreese]

“We are not perfect people…but we expect you to be”😂😂😂😂😭 This was a beautiful roast!!

[@veenibik336]

Yes yes yes

[@IvanSoregashi]

- basically anyone in US.

[@AxenfonKlatismrek]

Joshua Graham: We cant expect god to do all the work

[@CalebThomasMedia]

I spent 5 years working as the media director of one of these places, and this is all so painfully true. I remember dropping $25k on projectors without even blinking, while old ladies tithed on their social security and cut their pills in half.

[@coreyw5981]

☹️

[@MiriamMillen]

Please write a book about your experiences.

[@jeremiahmeade710]

Wow, you spent 25k on a projector? Why did you do that?

[@CalebThomasMedia]

@@jeremiahmeade710 Cause it was part of my job? I even came in under budget-

[@liamvosefski2795]

@@jeremiahmeade710 not his money the "church's"

[@Wythaneye]

I don't know if "assholery" is a word but sadly, his description of megachurch pastors is spot on.

[@Bananna_man]

I go to a small united methoist church, and before you say anything my pastor actually brought it up he said” I don’t care what the united Methodist church is doing rn, I’m in the buisness of saving souls” Truly the difference between mega and small churches

[@Vladimir_Zolotov]

Just when the world needed a Hero, Roger stood back up.

[@troggywoggy5552]

That’s Brother Roger to you!

[@nicholasmwangangi6257]

"We want you to believe that our church might have an Asian guy in it somewhere" I died🤣🤣🤣

[@buamp8186]

You took the music stuff right out of my head. I grew up in church and every word of that is 100% accurate.

[@romeomarbella5008]

I was raised in a similar church, and I struggled with the way we did praise and worship, which felt like a rock concert moshpit, and many members seemed to lead double lives outside of church. Sunday gatherings felt like fashion shows, and people often bragged. I eventually left the church, but my parents, who are good Christians, continued to pray for me. Thankfully, I found a Protestant church in Canada after relocating, and it brought me back to Jesus. The members there live Christ-like lives-modest, humble, hardworking, and kind. The pastor, who owns a construction company, takes nothing from the church funds, which are meticulously recorded and transparent. Witnessing countless selfless acts by the members, I have never felt happier and more content as a true Christian. Choose your church carefully, avoiding those that affirm specific sins as normal. We are Christians based on Christ's terms, not the other way around, cherry-picking convenient Bible verses. Find a church where you feel blessed and inspired by members living Christ-like lives.

[@phantommangagirl]

“Jesus, he loves like water” is every Christian rock song ever 😂😂😂

[@castalejandra]

And mabe a tree

[@stenyethanmathews945]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@ricklovelaec6442]

I went to a church that had a faith band, and there were times that I felt that the spirt had a message for the pastor to deliver, but the band just keep playing, to where the spirit just got up and left, saying I don't have all day to wait,

[@Balloushop13]

Thousand Foot Krutch is better than most of these other Christian rock bands.

[@saagisharon8595]

Sounds like a reference to Throwing Copper by Live

[@attananightshadow]

Used to go to a mega church, this was almost too kind. Should have mentioned all the toe-stepping that everyone does just to get a half inch closer to money…. I mean God.

[@kuttr-654]

Amen! 🤣

[@sodinc]

In my country religious organisation must work for at least a century to become tax-free I think something like this wouldn't work here

[@ATSucks1]

Creflo dollar churches and prosperity preaching visit the base and the website amen

[@KalafinaBTS]

Please, this. I used to go to a... (not exactly mega but a Church from a larger city) and it's the same, everything is for money, the pastors are so standoffish, everyone that works with the church are eager to take advantage of others...I was already close to being an apatheist back then, those experiences just cemented that. The serenity and the sense of 'community' that I've felt in much smaller village churches just...wasn't there. I don't like living in the village, but this is something that I always liked. If I'm being forced to go to a Church to hide my apatheism/athiesm then I'd rather go to a village church than this.

[@deathbypingpongball566]

What about children’s church?!

[@laurengaut42]

When he said,” lyrics with a picture of a torture device” I almost shit myself 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@KatrinaRainsong]

This is officially my favorite honest ad! 😂😂

[@bennyk384]

My god. This was really good. It’s almost scary how good it is.

[@PicoAndSepulveda]

Scary 😱

[@denverjames4864]

Just as scary is how close these "churches" are to political parties. Here in Australia, the Liberal Party and Hillsong are inseparable with a shit ton of taxpayer's money being ciphered into Hillsong's coffers.

[@LancesArmorStriking]

@@denverjames4864 I thought Hillsong was an American band? Scary how far their cultural influence is reaching, though I guess America is already everywhere, being the only globally expecting media producer on Earth. I mean hell, we're on KZbin

[@wachajulya]

A lot of American Church services are glorified Trump rallies

[@wachajulya]

Even after he is not an availabile canadate

[@zulimi]

This is so accurate. Doesn't make me feel so bad that I hated them as a missionary. The most significant church service I ever experienced was in the middle of nowhere with a biker gang.

[@akashtandel9633]

It sounds wonderful. You have to share the experience sir.

[@pranavghantasala6808]

Even as an atheist, I can appreciate the effect that genuine faith has on people. It's enheartening to know that that still exists, even despite the fact that almost everything's been turned into a product of some kind.

[@InfernosReaper]

@@pranavghantasala6808 these products wouldn't be bought so much if there weren't true believers to exploit

[@mushmush4980]

That biker gang church is something I'd like to see

[@scottlawton9459]

@@pranavghantasala6808 I think that’s how I feel as well. If religion helps people live better lives and they’re not hypocrites, let them be at peace. But the minute your religious views try to control matters of the State, or my person, it’s time to GTFO. Megachurches are the biggest hypocrites imaginable because people will literally go broke because Joel Osteen decided to start preaching the Prosperity Gospel again because his wife needed a manicure and his mistress a silent abortion all of a sudden.

[@katiaantonova6949]

This was great! 😂👏🏻 Made my otherwise stressful day. Thank you, Sir.

[@miguelmattos5520]

Reject modernity, embrace tradition 🇵🇹🇪🇸 > 🇩🇪🇬🇧 🇧🇷🇲🇽🇨🇴🇦🇷🇨🇺 > 🇺🇸🇨🇦 🇻🇦 > Modern Churchs

[@Kevin_2435]

"Jesus Christ would you shut the hell up?!" Is a perfect response to somebody sneezing.

[@mattwalls1340]

Haha!!!

[@epoen2012]

Reference to trump maybe? When he was being interviewed and told mick mulvaney to get out for sneezing

[@SavantAudiosurf]

Same meaning as "bless you."

[@cryofpaine]

"Jesus Christ would you shut the hell up?!" is the new motto of Christianity.

[@jesuschrist2987]

I mean.. it's situational.

[@WittyBitty]

Dear Roger, as a Christian who left a mega church last year... this was spot on!!

[@DJ.XreX-777]

Which megachurch?

[@JBoy340a]

Congrats on leaving the cult.

[@AntithesisFilms]

I hope you found your way to a more biblical church, instead. The mega-churches DO NOT proclaim the Gospel message and therefore do NOT represent true Christianity.

[@DJ.XreX-777]

@@AntithesisFilms How do you know mine doesn't? They clearly teach Christ and Him Crucified and Resurrected. This is honestly an attack on Christian megachurches because it generalizes this to all megachurches. And the problems you have with Hillsong and Bethel and Elevation Worship are between you and God.

[@uberkind-412]

Fellow Ghanaian here

[@beng557]

“Remember, we are not perfect people, but we sure as hell expect you to be.” 👀

[@Moloc2230]

Lol

[@noahpartic7586]

😆Why am I not surprised😈?

[@dontrend5956]

Nope. They only expect you to pay your way into heaven.

[@noahpartic7586]

@@dontrend5956 Doesn't work that way.

[@dontrend5956]

@@noahpartic7586 Sure it does. Ask any mega church pastor.

[@webhead66]

This. Fucking brilliant. "By the power of god's gift of planting people in the audience I declare you healed!"

[@vickylanding2830]

Bad language and I have the density to say GodThe wrath of God

[@dawndunstan4218]

"Wow, I'm healed from my non-specific illness!"

[@k9builder]

I haven't set foot in a mega- church in almost a decade, and that was for a reformation conference hosted by a couple dozen Lutheran churches.

[@cauliflowerpower1025]

Christian here, you hit the nail on the head with this one. Doesn't insult the faith at all but rather the consumerist nightmare that is the mega church

[@craigclose8490]

He is just Mockers anthis this not the way to deal with Issues and He will rot in hell You playing with Fire when Mock Jesus Christ who is the Head if the Church Under Scripture before you Mock God

[@cauliflowerpower1025]

@@craigclose8490 Learn to write in English before you start preaching in it. Talking about hellfire is not and has not ever been the Christian way. Again no he is mocking mega churches that steal money from people and hold insincere services

[@craigclose8490]

I will What you sow you will reap you mock God will reap his wroth Scripture teaches God is not mocked you with reap Gods worth You have no clue

[@craigclose8490]

I might said it eloquently My point is you don't mock God You mock God who is the Head of the Church You will see Gods Wroth Those Mega do more to put Schools put food in Eathquake hit Countries Medical supplies What have done Who are you judge You are a hypocrite and very self-righteous

[@craigclose8490]

You even have gut to put your name here

[@KristinaLopezWrites]

It’s supposed to be parody but….it’s really just accurate reporting.

[@idiom2805]

None of these have been parodies? They've all been accurate.

[@pumkin610]

Comedy is commentary

[@davegoldspink5354]

Yeah totally on the money.

[@kemy6775]

Well said

[@elizabethsullivan7176]

Satire is a sneaky way of teaching people things

[@Phillybirds215]

“We are not perfect people, but we sure as hell expect you to be” is an understatement 😂

[@utahgetmetwo456]

"Over laid with a torture device ancient Roman's used to kill criminals". I literally just spit out my coffee.

[@rakninja]

not really so surprising considering depicting their god nailed to such a torture device is one of their most common bits of religious iconography. since it's been so long since crucifixion was a common execution implement, it's not really amazing that most people forget the reality of what such a thing actually is.

[@Jaake-my2rq]

AND THEY WEAR THAT SHIT! NO ONE who truly follows Yeshua wears that Mithra garbage because it's a FUCKING INSULT. I truly hate these people. I hate their nicolaitan doctrine, I hate their STUPID fucking music, and I hate their tax-dodging, grin-toothed, hairdo-asshole "preachers".

[@edwardmiessner6502]

And the ancients said that being killed by that device was as shameful as can be, and somehow... effeminate

[@Chuked]

@@edwardmiessner6502 being nailed to a wooden cross would be quite shameful imo, Being left there to die and starve is a horrible way to die

[@rachele3334]

I’ve always thought that was weird. The cross is the murder weapon, yet people wear them as earrings and display them as decoration. I’m Christian, btw so I’m not mocking anyone’s faith. I just don’t understand the emphasis on the cross itself.

[@marvincool3744]

"We're not perfect people, but we sure sure as hell expect you to be." Roger hits the nail on the head once again.

[@melancholygirl7793]

Which is ironic since the bible allows you to be imperfect because it says as long as you ask dor forgiveness, Jesus will always give it to you.

[@noahpartic7586]

@@eyezxk 😱!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@andrewscotteames4718]

Remember, we’re not perfect but we sure expect you to be.

[@satevo462]

We could provide a Burning Man gathering year round at Megachurches.

[@monoludico6166]

"All of our music is inspired by love, god and U2's Joshua Tree" hahahaha, this is brilliant. This is so much!

[@jamesjames6601]

More like Michael W. Smith's Worship album, I Will Always Love You by Dolly Parton, and that stupid Titanic song from Celine Dion!

[@sandracheeks1811]

I love the way they point out that these “Christian” mega churches totally miss the actual Christian message.

[@flyingfree333]

You mean like where Jesus said to beat lazy slaves and kill drunk slaves? Or do you mean where Jesus said all non-Jews were dogs not worthy of table scraps? Or maybe where Jesus said he would personally torture every single person who didn't believe in him in hell forever? Or when Jesus threw a temper tantrum and destroyed a fig tree for the 'crime' of not bearing fruit when it wasn't in season? Or how about where Jesus said everyone who believed in him would be immune to all poisons? Christianity is a cult fraud, like every other religion that ever existed.

[@eacalvert]

@@flyingfree333 I think I want to be your friend

[@andrewspears8891]

@@flyingfree333 Oooh, got sources for those? Also that's pretty mild stuff compared to some other things in the Bible.

[@Bruce-vq7ni]

@@flyingfree333 Yes that sounds correct - ⚛

[@Jxzqzxv]

They ALL do.

[@LEGOZoey]

I'm not christian but this matches other descriptions i've heard, and this is way more funny

[@TankGirl-kr3vg]

😂😂😂 I grew up in one of these. Now I hate ALL organized religions. 😂😂😂

[@jacek-jd3ki]

The longer I listen to the Word of God, the better I feel. It's great! So pure. Changed. With new hope. I commend myself to your prayers.

[@nakenmil]

This is so accurate, even for a fair few non-mega churches, it's painful.

[@chriskatz2355]

Unfortunately

[@shawnwatson1419]

A majority of all churches anymore.

[@CamaroAmx]

True. Friend’s father was a pastor at a small town (2500 people max) church (one of 3 in town). He made damned good money ($60k a year in the late 90s). He only really worked 3 days a week (Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday). The rest of the week, he’d just work on his speech (sermon) and visit hospitals and do weddings and such.

[@chriskatz2355]

@@CamaroAmx i knew one preacher who because of the rest of the church preached things he didnt believe such as the "rapture"

[@peacemaker63604]

@@CamaroAmx take it from me, a sermon is no easy task, my dad is an elder in the church and has to lead the service when the pastor physically is unable to do so, and I get roped in to helping him with PowerPoint, KZbin and general I.T. for the sermon. It takes time, effort and 3 years off your life from stress.to make a good sermon without training.

[@jefferyfelix1416]

This is painfully accurate and funny. I’m a Christian and feel the same way about mega churches.

[@meagancarmichael3892]

Me too

[@Spottedshade]

there is a special place in hell for megachurches

[@retro3188]

Atheist here. Megachurches always felt a little shady to me, despite never having been in a church at all.

[@GoliathsChamp]

With as much energy it took to formulate these sentences, I'm sure you all could have already been part of the solutions. Or at least created yourselves opportunities around such. You still can be worked through, it is a choice. Take care of your neighbors and God bless

[@rarescevei8268]

​@@retro3188They arent churches, they are anti christian.

[@martinjones4516]

Having just watched the Hillsong documentary and been made aware of other similar situations here in the UK, this is disturbingly accurate. And very funny.

[@lindao.ezenwammadu7056]

Lol😂 the tote bags got me So true

[@leviswranglers2813]

So nice to be wrapped in the sweet embrace of Roger's calm, soothing voice once again.

[@limbrat5448]

Amen!

[@mr.butterworth4216]

“All our music is inspired by love, God, and U2’s Joshua Tree.” lol, ain’t that the truth?

[@lisasommerlad1337]

ahh... hillsong. bang on.

[@1218wbentrup]

Funniest line hands down

[@EyePodX]

Seriously why do all these mega-church bands sound like U2?

[@lisasommerlad1337]

@@EyePodX because thats the only worldly music their parents were allowed to listen to. (fan from 15 in 1980, but bored by joshua tree, by which time the orher christian kids had finally caught on). also, being iIrish, the melody was familar genetically. us celts like a good drone under a singable melody, like most tradittional hymns. plus. anything in the world that is seen as evil is automaticall seen as acceptable after twebty years, and holy,vafter thirty.

[@lisasommerlad1337]

@@EyePodX plus, that style must be what it takes to BRING IN THA MONEY!!!!! and uniqueness, growth or curiosity are forbidden in such churches. hence the "failed musicians". real artists get chucked out because they think.

[@saranghae2808]

This is one of the truest videos I have ever seen on KZbin. The other one is the one Roger did on nonprofits. Really, ALL OF ROGER'S VIDEOS ARE TRUE AF. But this one hit home so hard. Thanks Roger and team for the wonderful work you do!

[@naterksmr]

My ex was a part of one of these cults. I didn't really understand it at the time - I just knew she was religious but had some problems with the "traditional catholic church". Having grown up with heavy-handed religious parents myself, I was open about my agnostic "I don't know and I don't really care" beliefs before we even started dating, as well as some biases I had to overcome in realizing that a religion itself doesn't really define a person. There are good and bad people of every belief. Towards the end as we started mutually drifting apart, she made it very clear that a large part of the reason she couldn't see a future with me was because she couldn't be with someone who wasn't a part of her faith. Couldn't have figured that out 2 years ago and saved us both some heartache and wasted time, but whatever. She was also the kind of person who always portrayed herself as being super happy in public, but at home was constantly in a crappy mood and nothing made her happy. What's more, she had a friend in this cult who encouraged her to leave me from the start based solely on the fact I wasn't religious. When she told her friend about me when we started dating and all the things she liked about me, the only thing she wanted to talk about was how she needed to get away from me because I wasn't religious. I really dodged a bullet not ending up marrying that girl. In the words of Jeff Winger from Community, "Purity that demands exclusion isn't real purity."

[@evancombs5159]

According to actual Christian teachings she should have stayed with you and made an effort to make the marriage work. Being of different religious beliefs isn't reason for divorce within Christianity.

[@davidcattin7006]

@@evancombs5159 Being unequally yoked means that the two oxen are not equal in strength - one being weaker. When oxen are not equally yoked, they can not complete a task together well. Using this imagery, Christians cannot be partnered with unbelievers or they will not be able to live out the Christian life that God wants for them. 2 Corinthians 6:14

[@davidcattin7006]

Glad you got out of that mess! Wouldn't have ended well.

[@naterksmr]

@@evancombs5159 Luckily we never were married. God help the poor sap who ends up marrying that woman.

[@connor981]

@@evancombs5159the actual Christian teachings prohibit romantic relationships with non Christians so idk where you’re getting that from. It’s only different if you’re already married.

[@Reman1975]

If Cracked actually started selling those "Holy non-denominational happy Jesus house" shopping bags, I'm wondering how many they'd sell? I'm pretty sure they'd have a fair few people wanting them. :)

[@the_SolLoser]

I'd buy one for sure. And a copy of that movie.

[@stratometal]

@@the_SolLoser lol I would get the bag

[@dontrend5956]

But wait, there's more!

[@MissBlueEyeliner]

10/10 would buy at least 4

[@Danny-cy7tl]

I actually thought they were legit and was waiting on the information on how to get one 😂

[@coltL]

He pointed out every reason why I hate going to church in America. I’m a Christian and am saddened by the reality of what most mega churches are.

[@theBestInvertebrate]

There are lots of solid churches out there, amarican evengelical churches are a bit of a land mine though.

[@CoMtLion]

Ya most churches in the untied states are anything but christian.

[@CoMtLion]

@@rennietintin8701 Yup. I have a small church were I personally know the minister and they are taking proper social distancing precautions.... including masking and internet services.

[@jdkayak7868]

@@theBestInvertebrate evangelical is too broad, to be more specific is "non denominational" as these churches thrive with a top down power structure without the need for general assemblies.

[@theBestInvertebrate]

@@jdkayak7868 yes, evengelical is too broad. Thus the mine feild.

[@Perririri]

1:52 - "Massages with blessed endings"

[@MeghanBean]

The acting & editing in this is excellent

[@DougNeville17]

Currently serving in a small church in a low-income area in an obscure town in the north of England - pretty much the antithesis of yon “mega churches”. This video is so painfully accurate it’s funny in a depressing kind of way and exactly what happens when the love of money and self takes hold.

[@injunsun]

"Vicar of Dibley," then? I loved that show.

[@rjmunt]

Same lies. Hopefully no kids getting buggered.

[@Bob-of-Zoid]

Sorry, but the antithesis of religion is Atheism, and well, you have nothing to be proud about believing in unsubstantiated claims based on nothing but anecdote, let alone teaching it as truth and corrupting the minds of the innocent and gullible! Shame on you!

[@Bob-of-Zoid]

@@rjmunt The indoctrination itself is a form of child abuse!

[@salaltschul3604]

@@Bob-of-Zoid He said "antithesis of mega churches" not the antithesis of religion. Read.

[@MrBendorandoran]

2:21 “fronted by failed musicians” as a church musician this is unbelievably cathartic and therapeutic to hear

[@cracked]

As it was for me to write haha

[@jenniferhiemstra5228]

Here's what's wild...a great many of those people are actually great...as individuals as well as a band, but does the church pay them for that skill?? NO. And you KNOW they have they money for it! But I've walked into more traditional churches(hymns, church choir, organ, etc.) that are of named denominations and they're more likely to pay than the modern, 'non denominational' ones. Outside of the music director, not necessarily everyone gets paid but at least a few are...but I've NEVER come across a modern, N.D. church, large or small, that paid anyone on their worship team. Because for some reason, musicians are "Anointed by god" and not highly trained and skilled music professionals....the cognitive dissonance with this topic is a very touchy subject for me as you can tell.

[@timdunn2344]

Praise music only has 3 chords anyway, right?@@jenniferhiemstra5228

[@Forceprincess]

This is so accurate that it hurts😂

[@benjamingutierrez4260]

I appreciate the satire actually it was tastefully done