The Bachelorette Speedrun

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Clare completed the bachelorette in record time
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[@kale3504]

Claire: I'm 39 years old The Bachelorette: Watch this 99 year old woman find love before she disintegrates from old age.

[@volkan7844]

Watch the last of her species of vampire try to find love before we drive a stake through her heart!

[@nosleep9816]

lmao that's so true

[@GamesFromSpace]

Will this ancient crone be able to drain youth from an unsuspecting bachelor, and cling to life for a few more years?

[@c12486]

bruh her name was on the screen like 60 times there's no i

[@MustraOrdo]

@@c12486 Oh hi, Clare, how's Dale?

[@molehie]

She should really be quarantining, her old age puts her at really high risk.

[@gracefulslumber8441]

💀

[@killabean6830]

Surprised that she's not using a cane, her back must be aching right now. Quite strong for a 200 year old lady.

[@aroundth3w0rId]

@@killabean6830 SINGLE LADY

[@asphyxia9786]

@@killabean6830 She got a lot of practice with all the relationships she had to carry being the only one showing up (ヽ´ω`)

[@justajobro1266]

I almost died after reading this

[@elisyasinea1727]

The jump cuts during Claire’s interviews may be because she forgot her lines due to being old and senile. Jarvis I am disappointed that you would mock the elderly like this, shame on you.

[@cardcaptorkiwi2019]

I have no idea if this is sarcasm or not.

[@kitties4ever706]

@@cardcaptorkiwi2019 yes 🧤

[@pastelloca6976]

@@kitties4ever706 How the fuck did you get that mitten emoji?

[@kitties4ever706]

@@pastelloca6976 the black market has a lot of unusual products... but this is just from the new iOS update

[@goldsrcorsource2551]

It sounds like a YTP with how much it's cutting and how different each clip starts and ends.

[@akaellie8429]

I would pay good money to see an actual 90 year old grandma as the bachelorette

[@MegaraTheUnwise]

My great grandpa is in his nineties, he could be the bachelor

[@creativedesignation7880]

Now that I would watch!

[@IAmNotNicolex]

Dude, they actually are planning an elder show for the franchise. Obviously they couldn’t film this year because Covid and high risks but it’s still in the works, apparently 😂

[@gronklevlonkle1717]

I'll pool in my life savings to that

[@thatcutenerdgirl6090]

I would love a 90 year old bachelorette dating 30 25 year old stud muffins

[@Rift_Hawkman]

“Oldest bachelorette and only shoot for two weeks” At face value it sounds like she just died while shooting.

[@ilovecairns5181]

Most people die when shot... so...

[@squee-g1658]

@@ilovecairns5181 that made me laugh more than it should have...

[@lvbboi9]

@@ilovecairns5181 beat me to it 3 weeks early

[@awesomedude5558]

@@squee-g1658 Same, lol. I loved that comment!!!!!!! XD

[@awesomedude5558]

@@ilovecairns5181 Okay, but bro. This comment is underrated. This is hysterical!!!!! XD I mean that. You're good at humor, man. Really good. :)

[@eekay9947]

"I feel sorry for Taesha because she's inherited this pile of broken men and has to pick up the pieces" is a gem

[@caithenry8429]

Forreal, that Jason guy needs to see an actual therapist after the show, Clare really did a number on that poor guy.

[@fuki_slam]

I think he did a number on himself tbh

[@riisntsryc3771]

@@fuki_slam lmao

[@YourBaeFromBusan]

We have to fix everything all the time 🙄🙄🤣

[@superlolgal555]

Now THIS is a guy who loves to hate to secretly love this show.

[@rayfich]

Iol

[@freshbread4039]

Accurate

[@airotiv7916]

🤣👍👍💜

[@yusharider]

No one can true love this show. It's like an addiction, people only like it in the moment.

[@superlolgal555]

@Ross With No Sauce Hell yeah dude. My entire childhood

[@tartnouveau3652]

“Normally in the show when they cut to someone we’re like who’s that?” Cuts to Danny Gonzales

[@mutantceasar1165]

This comment is way underrated.

[@superstellarhere]

*Drew Gooden. You proved his point, you don’t know who Drew Gooden is smh 🤦.

[@tartnouveau3652]

@@superstellarhere Wait a second. Are you telling me Drew Gooden and Danny Gonzales are NOT the same person? How?

[@TPNsBiggestFan]

@@tartnouveau3652 No, they’re wrong, they ARE the same person. Can’t they see from the music video? They just messed up their lines and said the opposite of what they actually are

[@yn2310]

@@superstellarhere it's obviously kurtis?? smh fake fans

[@madisyn7097]

Clare: I’m 39 Everyone else: yeah, 39 seconds from death

[@c12486]

ugh when will the forced diversity stop!!! cast a 12 year old bachelorette so she actually has a real chance at love!!!!

[@omnical6135]

@@c12486 how is casting somebody 12 seconds from death gonna be any better?

[@AkumaDayo]

@@c12486 it's actually really funny that your name is also Clare and it's spelled the same lol

[@Insomniac1985]

I know! The 39 year old could anytime now​@@c12486

[@walshling16]

claire: is 39 years old show: watch this woman who we borrowed from a nursing home talk about Dale the whole time

[@superstellarhere]

You just gotta Dale with it I’m so so sorry

[@aroundth3w0rId]

@@superstellarhere its fine, I dale-t with it.

[@superstellarhere]

@@aroundth3w0rId wow, surprisingly this joke isn’t getting Dale!

[@redcraig-]

LMAO

[@NiftyMissi]

You might not like it, but he's the i-dale male

[@catsocksnyaanyan9107]

Claire's dramatic monologue has more cuts in it then a youtube apology god damn

[@rayfich]

Lol

[@s_spiritstar]

Literally

[@thegalaxyinapaperbag]

more cuts than a ytp

[@brianelson1481]

This is the first time for me in the Marvel universe -Owen Wilson 🤣🤣

[@philbuttler3427]

My theory is Dale is so charismatic they had to edit the show to try and make him look bad because everyone from editors to cameramen to the host all fell deeply in love with him via his sheer charisma and they were actually trying to keep us all from falling for Dale and the entirety of western society collapsing over the inevitable Dale conflicts.

[@WilliamPasta]

I agree

[@bipbipbrim]

Dale is an SCP lol

[@rachelelizabeth9904]

the bachelorette is like that friend who is convinced they’re the main character but really the whole group doesn’t like them.

[@actionjackson3522]

The one friend who always has some drama going on, but it's just them blowing everything out of proportion.

[@annaeggland9397]

so tori vega

[@DafinaNotAwesome]

I’ve never seen a statement more true in my life

[@gavhoffman3165]

hey

[@kaesyo2966]

...

[@ko379]

You’re so well rounded. Pokémon and bachelorette.

[@gavhoffman3165]

LOL

[@gavhoffman3165]

i enjoyed this comment :)

[@peppereaterlivestream4357]

What’s your first name

[@gavhoffman3165]

@@peppereaterlivestream4357 Gavin

[@caelmack]

That degree coming in clutch

[@copta5525]

"Congratulations, you've just blown up 'The Bachelorette.'" Hard cut to the smoldering remains of the resort, Dale is dead, the Harvard guy is dead, half of Chris Harrison's robot face is melted off his robot head. Claire has blown up The Bachelorette.

[@pietastix]

I love this comment lololol

[@doll_dress_swap1269]

I keep reading this over and over and then laughing like crazy

[@pietastix]

@@doll_dress_swap1269 SAME

[@mrsadfacepancake4338]

jason is an accomplice, it's not his first rodeo

[@MandJTV]

BEHOLD THE MAJESTIC CLARENDALE

[@yaldabaothofgalar2618]

Whoa. Didn't expect to see you here. The KZbin circles are so diverse.

[@buizeltube6624]

good to see you Micheal!

[@nikcantsnipe]

Whoa, its Michael!

[@donaldconrad6729]

@Yaldabaoth of Galar me to

[@beegcuh3072]

Hail Yeah!!

[@fiorefiore9910]

I just got tested for covid last week, and I can confirm: when they told me I was negative the birds started singing, the squirrels started dancing, everyone in the street high-fived me and 15 guys offered to date me all at once. That's just the standard procedure.

[@GamesFromSpace]

Gonna be awkward if it was a false negative, after all those dates.

[@m_e_nere]

Maybe you're just built different

[@mitchkat123]

I need to get tested tomorrow because the child I babysit is positive and I’m really hoping to have that moment

[@racermk8759]

@@mitchkat123 lmao

[@geekmyths]

Dude I hate to break it to you, but it might have been a false negative... Nobody came and declared you were the bachelorette

[@naofied]

Dale deadass looks like the guy who says: “i aint never seen two pretty best friends”

[@actionjackson3522]

I'm certain it's always just a pretty girl and her reflection.

[@gavhoffman3165]

LMFAO

[@nosleep9816]

OH MY GOD--

[@Soapcookies]

jayrscotty

[@aisha5156]

He really does though.💀

[@bradenellis4823]

Jarvis: Dale is always showing up in places where he shouldn't be Clare: He really showed up

[@rheakg]

LMAO CRYING

[@person954]

"He went to Harvard, and that's really the only character trait he has" *Andy Bernard, Cornell Alum has entered the chat*

[@melaniemagolan2241]

*Brent Norwalk, Princeton alum, has entered the chat*

[@omnical6135]

*pretend i said something funny and relevant, brokea$$ alum has entered the chat*

[@gentlesandladymen]

Of topic but nice profile pic

[@superstellarhere]

*Trent from The Prom musical has entered the chat to talk about gay people*

[@jackmattingly6780]

Toofer from 30 Rock has entered the chat

[@skenjamin7683]

They always ask “who is dale”, but they never ask “how is dale”.

[@mumbledmeatballs5629]

I’ll do you one better. Why is dale?

[@suckit1335]

I’ll do you one better. What is dale?

[@farateq]

i’ll do you one better. when is dale

[@astrolouise6904]

where is dale?

[@user-oj7np2ej1z]

Oh shoot you beat me too it

[@tannerparks6030]

The person who choose Claire has dyslexia and told everybody the next bachelorette was 93 and when they found out she was only 39 they didn't have time to rewrite the promos so they just went with it

[@streamlily5971]

I-

[@dominicking4739]

IS THAT TRUE LMAO

[@4mira]

@@dominicking4739 probably lmaoaoao

[@louloudaki_]

wait isn’t that dysgraphia or something? but i love this omg

[@harrietdweh9883]

HAHAHAHSJJS NOT THISSS 💀💀💀

[@ohnonotthegoldfish3559]

"You are 100% clear to go-" "Yes!" "-away from this show. You're 100% infected with COVID."

[@omnical6135]

"in fact you're so infected I really shouldn't be talking to you in person"

[@AlinaProbably]

The funny thing is, Claire DOES mean "clear" in French...

[@annaboogman3321]

"She's a rational person". The whole point of reality tv is that NO ONE is rational because that makes good tv.

[@rayfich]

Iol

[@thealientree3821]

It explains Trump’s presidency.

[@uncreativeusername8081]

"theres a claire front runner and the other guys have to dale with it" -the actual bachelorette commercial

[@vanadium8865]

I seriously wonder how the writers felt about that one

[@anna_banana414]

I appreciate the puns though, I enjoy them, but why?

[@anna_banana414]

@@vanadium8865 tbh they probably wrote it 😭 also I love your pfp hehe

[@vanadium8865]

@@anna_banana414 Aw, thanks!

[@fivefoxesinatrenchcoat1744]

It’s official now: the writers are middle-aged dads.

[@pleaseenteraname6590]

You know someone’s had a bad love life when there list of things their looking for in a person is: 1. Show up 2. Be on time 3.

[@terriblename4084]

3. *D A L E*

[@bulbasour3]

Their, they're

[@dany56698]

*Bernie Sanders Meme: "I'm once again asking straight women to have even one (1) standard"*.jpg

[@quirkyblackenby]

@@dany56698 please

[@tiffany15O5]

@@dany56698 how is this a straight thing?

[@babbybobabs8701]

I hope Claire's age isn't like- a touchy subject for her or anything lol, can you imagine if you were a 39 year old lady who didn't really like talking about her age, and then suddenly hundreds of people are like "WOAH THIS LADY IS STHE *OLDEST* BACHLORETTE!!!!! SHE'S PRACTICACLLY DEAD NOW!! THIS IS HER LAST CHANCE AT LOVE!"

[@Financiallyfreeauthor]

Man that reminds me of when I talked about dying my hair on TikTok and mentioned being 39 at that time. I got roasted for WEEKS by kids telling me I was lying because I clearly have to be at least 70 🤦‍♀️

[@ayushiroy2944]

@@Financiallyfreeauthor OH NO IM SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭to put it into perspective, my peers (im 18) all seem to think that everyone above 30 is ancient for some reason

[@Financiallyfreeauthor]

@@ayushiroy2944 It's totally natural. And they will be 40 before they know it!

[@rhapsodybohemiann]

"alright. where is dale?" "i’ll do you one better. who is dale?" "i’ll do you one better! why is dale?"

[@omnical6135]

i'll do you one better. what is dale?

[@bananabob7619]

@@omnical6135 I'll do you one better. Dale.... Is that from an anime or something?

[@superstellarhere]

I’ll do you one better, when is Dale?

[@theepicwhatisnottakenyay8028]

I’ll do you one better... how is dale?

[@omnical6135]

@@theepicwhatisnottakenyay8028 dale is doing bad

[@actionjackson3522]

The Bachelorette: We had to shut down production! This show could all be over! Jarvis: *Kim, there are people that are dying*

[@clairem391]

😂😂😂

[@bumblebai7193]

😂😂😂

[@igorkraljevski9191]

Plot twist: Dale is the famous speedrunner Dream 😂🤣😌

[@auliamate]

Loooooolllllooooooollllloooooooolllllloooooooool🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@slevinchannel7589]

This disgusting shame of humanity still exists in 2020. Thanks.

[@GodChaotic]

Bro didn't want his kid to see him play dodgeball naked, even though he wasn't even there, but was okay with his kid watching him insult and belittle someone for something that didn't even affect him

[@veronica_sawyer0188]

Ooof true

[@thashana_0194]

he did have his reasons though

[@zaynab-to-a]

I wanna see your shot glass collection

[@mstie3252]

Who would ever imagine that a show like the bachelorette would do something like naked dodgeball? Shocking. I thought all the dates were like taffy pulls and going on a bike ride to the park.

[@XFearMeXx]

@@thashana_0194 and what were those reasons? Being elitist and manipulative?

[@wagoogas8805]

Man how is that 39 Year old gonna find love? She's gonna fall victim to her toothpick bones and fall apart if she even tries to kiss a guy!

[@verybarebones]

I didn't realize showing her by the sofa was supposed to show how hard quarantine is bc that room alone is at least twice the size of my apartment so yea

[@gloriousanimationz5244]

Claire's dating criteria is literally my life. "Just show up".

[@gavhoffman3165]

hey

[@gloriousanimationz5244]

@@gavhoffman3165 lol thanks

[@gavhoffman3165]

@@gloriousanimationz5244 youre welcome? tf did i do

[@gloriousanimationz5244]

@@gavhoffman3165 nothing 😊

[@gavhoffman3165]

k

[@LezbeOswald]

the way everyone focused on her being "tHe OlDeSt BaChElOrEtTe" is a new kind of misogyny i wasn't expecting from a show misogynistic in its premise, but hey, it's fun to be surprised.

[@paprikaa117]

I mean she is the oldest bachelorette

[@o.s8573]

Her age is totally unrelated to her gender though. They are two different things

[@nataliejulow]

O . S men of the same age are never shamed on this show and it is never made into a big deal. The misogyny lies in the way she is treated for her age as opposed to a man of the same age, and how her older age is perceived to lower her value.

[@safabekr]

It’s because there’s a misogynistic belief that women’s value decreases with age. If a bachelor was 35+ I’m sure there wouldn’t be as much fuss about it, but since it’s a bachelorette and women are “supposed” to be married by now, people are overly invested in her age

[@qorso]

@@safabekr bachelors that are 35+ are common-place in the show though. they arent bringing attention to that she's 35+, they're bringing attention to that she's the oldest, no matter her age.

[@neolord1215]

The worst part about Jason attacking Claire so aggressively is that in her old age it was entirely possible she'd disintegrate.

[@jeniferhollings3865]

Elderly abuse

[@TheNormExperience]

Claire: “All I care about is showing up. Someone who shows up for me. A man that will show up.” Dale: “Well, I’m here.” This guy understood the assignment 😂

[@charlimarieTV]

Thank you for making this video so that I don’t have to actually watch the whole show myself 😅

[@Liloandsalem]

I agree!

[@Laurenjoinsyoutube]

you should watch the channel bachelor fan take. he reviews the episodes in short 10 minute videos and its great

[@marissabones]

Yes!

[@tovebjrsvik4964]

😂

[@rayfich]

Ok

[@lotusthemermaid]

Yosef was the one setting a horrible example for his daughter.

[@roadtodawn8088]

I’m scared for his daughter honestly

[@asuspiciouslyefficientmito8338]

IKR, if anything Claire was a better role model, standing up for herself and being a strong independent woman

[@jochenarnold7215]

Pls watch unreal

[@sometimeslol5578]

I kinda get where he is coming from with the being naked on tv but he probably shouldn't have gone on the show is he dosnt like that stuff and he's being an asshole about it

[@Abby-wj5je]

imagine seeing your dad in tv, but it’s not even like a cool show

[@IHateCopperGolems]

"Be that onion, I love it" --shrek- -Clare

[@zach23ize]

My girlfriend and I feel so bad for dale. The “sit down” reveal after production episode showed dale muttering maybe 3 words, and Claire saying “show up” 30 times while painting this happily ever after fairytale she sees in dale. I give their relationship a year before they divorce. I’m sure Dale does like her, but he by no means loves her. You can tell by the way he looks at her, and speaks about her

[@shannonceleste5557]

Welp you ended up being way too generous with your guess 😂

[@zach23ize]

@@shannonceleste5557 wait they divorced already?!

[@zach23ize]

@@shannonceleste5557 I looked into it. That is wild to say the least

[@dothmotherknowyouwearth]

@@zach23ize what’s the amount of time until they divorced?

[@zach23ize]

@@dothmotherknowyouwearth I’m too lazy to look it up again (even though it’s legitimately a top search on google), but I believe it was 3 months or so

[@lud3445]

And once again a woman makes history for being "old" and publicly existing in some manner. Oh how much progress have we made...

[@eoincampbell1584]

Delete it old!

[@lud3445]

@@eoincampbell1584 put it in quotes...what would be an accurate term? Being sincere now, cause mature, normal or not young sound even worse (specially mature, women past 35 aren't fruits!)

[@Kilioh15]

@@lud3445 The point is to call her a woman. Not an old woman.

[@MikeyCyan]

Bahahah PC police have banned ageing now. Priceless.

[@eoincampbell1584]

@@lud3445 I was making a reference to the Demi Lavatto "Delete it fat!" fake controversy but ok go off.

[@Lanedude08]

I really wish hot people would stop acting like COVID has affected them worse than anyone else

[@Chipiliro613]

_Will no-one think of the hot people?!?_

[@gloriousanimationz5244]

OH NO THE HOT PEOPLE

[@n8style]

Right! Plus celebrities too..."oh no we're just like the plebs we could get it too"

[@charteon9092]

Leave the children! Save the hot people and celebrities!

[@pixiestxNyomouf]

right, i have lost my granddad because of covid but they salty cause they can't turn up. Read the room smh

[@Rodders955]

Clearly, if Clare's parents are Lily and James, she's the Girl who Loved

[@galaxychill9578]

Clarely

[@MorriganSlayde]

"You're not. FIT. to be. THE. MOTHER. of my. child." It sounds pieced together too LMAO

[@tomatoanus]

speedrun is one word, cmon jarvis youre doin us dirty

[@threeco2350]

oh, thats explains why the title looks so strangely off

[@westein1282]

True. (Also, the "J" in Jarvis is capitalized.)

[@nyarthecat8195]

it changed

[@redhotgaming9404]

ayy my favorite speedrunner

[@Animanatee]

I really enjoyed your mirrors edge and doom eternal speedrun videos, keep it up man you make staying home bearable.

[@florianschnabel1237]

Great seeing Danny Gonzalez on the show. I thought he was married though.

[@hellopinkman8410]

Does anyone know what that clip of Danny is from

[@adelitaflores-moss454]

I looked 5 min to find this comment

[@eerknwoon]

Was he?

[@florianschnabel1237]

@@eerknwoon I was surprised too.

[@sanjulkapoor6637]

@@hellopinkman8410watch his video on the bachelorette last year, is the same clip

[@hannahjoy333.]

No ones gonna talk about how she said “be that onion” like it isn’t the most memeable thing I’ve ever heard

[@omnical6135]

timestamp

[@superstellarhere]

12:43

[@sarahmorris4575]

Lmaooo was that a Shrek reference???

[@ash64181]

22:45 Wasn't ready to see Drew Gooden, felt like someone licked my toes.

[@glasswendigo8041]

Good description of that feeling. Yet, I’m not sleeping for the next week.

[@abbymorrison3097]

Dann-

[@gen2mediainc.577]

I love how “editing Jarvis “ actually wears a totally different outfit like he’s from some lofi AU

[@agelessorca]

Lol

[@gen2mediainc.577]

btw Jarvis rocks that colorful business casual outfit imo

[@pl4y3dout23]

Pretty sure that hes wearing a different outfit not only because of the bit but also because it's a different day so hes probably not wearing the same clothes

[@vizthex]

same

[@LilacMonarch]

@@pl4y3dout23 no way, doesn't everyone just wear the same clothes everyday? (joke)

[@tiktik-ks4pg]

“You are not fit to be the mother of my child” is my new favorite insult

[@phosphenevision]

Ngl someone broke up with me like that....

[@AMCW90]

@@phosphenevision that's rough buddy

[@SockMan17]

I’m going to actually use this in a fight

[@Kalivahcide]

@@phosphenevision Ayyy same!!

[@lvbboi9]

@@Kalivahcide dont say "ayy" like its a cool thing

[@heidibedell370]

Bennet and John Paul jones would either be best friends, or the worst rivals. No I’m between

[@averyrose2262]

If my boyfriend doesn't propose by saying, "I'm hot. Will you marry me?" I will be very disappointed

[@justsayingguy]

y do you want he lie to you?

[@oppositeofbatman]

This is not GOLD content Jarvis. This is just really good content.

[@paprikaa117]

"I just want to say that I'm a really big fan"

[@cryo311old]

66 likes Nice

[@lakamokolaka]

Thanks satan

[@voelligbanane844]

Some would say it's hella nice.

[@joearellano6541]

Thank God’s prosecutor and gambling buddy!

[@rachelbrueckner441]

God, I can’t even. The 7:30 sequence of the animals rejoicing is straight out of a Disney movie. It’s too perfect.

[@KirstenMarie_MS3]

This season makes me feel like an absolute mummy (the dead, Egyptian kind, not a parent) because I'm 33 in and not married either. God forbid a woman want to get her shit straight before drawing in some poor innocent guy.

[@deadgrape5704]

Claire is the boy who lived. She lived very long verrrrry long like unimaginably long she’s 39 YEARS OLD she’s practically dead

[@enchantedevergreen5329]

They made her grave ready when she hit 35

[@deadgrape5704]

Here lies the oldest woman to ever live

[@enchantedevergreen5329]

All she ever wanted was a man to be there and show up.

[@louloudaki_]

(sorry for the unwanted musical reference but it fits) 🎶WELCOME TO THE RENNAISANCE🎶 (where everyone dies at age 30)

[@TheWatercolourNymph]

Imagine you're singing to the birds and twirling in the sunshine thinkin you're going to be playing live-action Snow White and then they tell you you're actually going to be *The Geriatric Bachelorette*

[@dishadharmraj6986]

😂😂 you made me really laugh

[@carinaraymond2]

This comment needs a warning label!!! 😭☠️

[@rustyhowe3907]

💀💀🤣🤣

[@SeptembersOblivion]

22:45 ma boy Danny Gonzalez! I didn't know he was on the show, damn, you really can cut to anyone and no one will notice that person was never even there...

[@nobelium4487]

I looked it up and its actually an inside joke. Danny made a tweet about getting a cameo in the previous bachelor video and its the same clip.

[@CrazedKasaJizo]

@@nobelium4487 They were making a joke about Jarvis doing that in another video about the Bachelor(ette)

[@No-le8jm]

Jarvis is the only person who could make me care about this show

[@moiranevala6964]

I’m sorry but I did not come here for Bennett slander

[@emilyd4469]

Bennett saved the first half. He's just there to vibe and I'm here for it

[@anglicusrose]

Bennett spent every minute after his intro making up for that Harvard comment and he deserves our support *smacks table*

[@caithenry8429]

How could Jarvis not stan someone who's ultimate burn was saying that Dale looked like the snake from the Jungle Book?! I was in tears when he said that freakishly accurate statement!

[@breekennedy3945]

Me and my husband love Bennett. He’s a golden retriever of a man

[@anglicusrose]

@@breekennedy3945 he's truly the JPJ of the season

[@teddypawncrumps23]

Yosef: What would my daughter or my family think of me if they saw me do that? Yosef: *Shares a woman with 29 other men on national television and berates her for participating in it with him*

[@C00kii0]

😩😂🤣😂😂🤣😂

[@melissamikaelson9650]

I mean I kinda side with him, it’s of course not Clare’s fault for the event but it looks bad as him as a man trying to find love and one of the activities is stripping or dancing practically naked. It’s demeaning. He was standing up for himself and the other guys, but nobody really was appreciative, though I’m sure they felt the same or were maybe embaressed or ashamed. He was a bit aggressive and rude when talking to her though, but honestly she was too so...

[@bodhisattva2348]

@@melissamikaelson9650 she might not have even had a choice in the matter bc these reality shows be doing the most behind the scenes

[@pixiel1xie]

@@melissamikaelson9650 he literally wasn’t even on the date. He’s getting pressed over smth he didn’t even do and then proceeded to be a misogynistic little shit. He wasn’t valid lol.

[@controversialopinion5722]

@@pixiel1xie when was he misogynistic?

[@atleastitried7739]

Why does editing Jarvis look cooler than recording Jarvis

[@ADHDandD]

Why you gotta do my man normal Jarvis like that guy?

[@atleastitried7739]

@@ADHDandD im just saying

[@Adrianaisjawsome]

Editing Jarvis has foresight.

[@kaioe]

I'm just now finding this guy's channel and he seems so nice. I love how he smiles while he speaks. Hello, Jarvis :)

[@rheakg]

He’s such a good KZbinr

[@pietastix]

This is so wholesome awe

[@haileygiabiconi8830]

His sense of humor and stupid jokes are so good 😭

[@Financiallyfreeauthor]

He is the sweetest!

[@cobbl3r]

"Who is Dale" "Why is Dale" "What's Dale's deal" As someone named Dale i feel so attacked right now...

[@dib9003]

Look at Dale's old j videos tell now, ex football player he has some things going on,I think you will be proud you share same name.

[@creaturehands]

Sorry, Dale. 😔

[@cobbl3r]

@@dib9003 I appreciate the thought but somehow I, a petite female who looks like she only weights 100 lbs went soaking wet, find it hard to see myself as a football player

[@archanashreedhar5089]

How are you, Dale ? Lol

[@hkazu63]

Same, I’ve never heard my name be said this much outside of like...King of the Hill.

[@jazzyt609]

Why does Jarvis look like he's on a zoom call with his colleagues about his new business proposal?

[@sierramelody3886]

my mom just came in my room and apologized for talking because she "didn't know i was on a zoom call" lol

[@stephanielopez8347]

he just puts out that vibe

[@evcotter08]

@@sierramelody3886 that’s hilarious.

[@melissahanson8096]

Jarvis: “Birds are chirping flowers are blooming” *Megalovania starts playing in the background*

[@Baruch.Goldstein]

One of my favourite parts about your fanbase is that nobody makes fun of you for liking the bachelorette and we all mostly just watch your videos on it anyways

[@dacool66]

Dale looks like he hasn't graduated 3rd grade but is still incredibly smart.

[@Babyteef]

isnt it rude to point out a woman's age?

[@dacool66]

@@Babyteef what? Yeah. But what?

[@vanadium8865]

@@dacool66 Maybe they replied to the wrong comment

[@kayladean597]

@@Babyteef plot twist Dale is actually a woman

[@pastillarojaacademia2047]

@@Babyteef you lost? 😭

[@Gwynhyvr]

'i expected more from the oldest bachelorette' how many red flags we up to now?

[@elbowsbuns1896]

*checks notes* I lost count a long time ago

[@Gwynhyvr]

shoot, that makes two of us...

[@d.tsukuyomi1869]

Level: he is a red flag that acquired human form.

[@serendipityyoonmin7039]

Stopped counting, tbh

[@kingblue1996]

Idk but she did have alot of them to many to count

[@TylaStark]

Jarvis laughing at his own jokes is high quality precious content

[@prettypetite]

“He’s just showing up in places where he’s not supposed to be” Well that’s what she asked for innit

[@rayfich]

Lol

[@piagebot2943]

I have a feeling that Dale and the “I ain’t ever seen two pretty best friends” guy are related

[@werdahd9166]

Lmao yes

[@kleerude]

To be clear, when they filmed this, COVID tests were extremely scarce and even some hospitals didn’t have enough. But at least Clare (and her animal friends) throughly enjoyed getting tested!

[@IHateCopperGolems]

You: *drops the H bomb* People: Oh, alright okay guy

[@Finn-us7xg]

the chess dude seemed sweet tho

[@madhatt3r93]

The "doctor said you are 100% clear" is funnier when you think theyre talking about STDs

[@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494]

It's also funny when you realise there are no other kinds of clear. "You are 96% clear!" is not a thing in either case.

[@Evan-es9jr]

Bruh dale bouta walk into a high security military establishment bein like, i-i-i wrong door

[@Oh_She_Is]

i disagree with some sentiments. claire was not giving the guys a fair chance after night 1. it was obvious that she was only thinking about dale and didn't give a shit about the other guys. she said she was always in the conversation with them but you could tell she wasn't. she would say constantly that she was only thinking about dale even on other dates. meanwhile it's day 2 and she's already decided it's dale basically. she would praise him for things the other guys were doing as well (5 men went over to comfort her immediately after the yosef situation and as soon as dale came over like 10 minutes later she cried in his arms and kept saying that because he came to check on her it made her feel better). she would let that one dude break rules (dm'ing her even though it wasn't allowed, coming to talk to her when he lost the group date) with no consequences. the guys could see all this and felt disrespected and honestly it's understandable. and that dodgeball group date was messed up. it was strip dodgeball and she had them strip down to jockstraps and walk home like that all the while clearly ogling them. if you watched the episode you could see most of the dudes felt uncomfortable doing the challenge. it was dehumanizing. if they were all on board then i would have no problem but they clearly were not all that comfortable. yosef...... while he went about it completely the wrong way and was a huge asshole, i agreed with most of what he said (in the first part of his spiel). he lost himself in the last half though and was just being an ass to be an ass. anyway i'm glad she's off and tayshia's coming in because she's great and from what i've seen so far she's actually giving these guys a chance. love her already

[@TranshumanMarissa]

This comment is a year old, howevveerr.... what would giving the guys a chance accomplish? Attraction isnt fair, lol. like, IF she gave the guys a chance, but was already this infatuated with Dale, all that would happen is she would pick Dale, but like, after a lot of time wasting. Like, the whole point of giving people a chance is to figure out who has the edge, or to see if something deeper develops, but frankly, There would be a one in a million odds of one of the other guys somehow managing to push Dale out of her infatuation, even if she had given them all a truely fair shot, cause Dale already had one hell of a lead, and thats fine. Thats just how attraction works sometimes.

[@carolynmccampbell8920]

I completely get why people really dislike Yosef, I mean so do I. However, he did make a really good point (before he got unnecessarily personal) about how humiliating it is for men to stip down to practically nothing on national television. When it was announced they would be stripping, some guys were visibly not comfortable with it, and there was even a contestant who said to Clare something like "I like you a lot, but not enough to strip that much." Imagine if this happened on the Bachelor and the lead asked all the women in the house to play strip dodgeball to thongs. Double standards like this can be hurtful to guys who may also only strip due to peer pressure and then compare their bodies to other guys in the house. Anyway, thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

[@bisinzhu8685]

Yes! I completely agree!

[@bisinzhu8685]

We see a lot of double standards in this season, also surrounding Clare’s age

[@elbowsbuns1896]

Oof yeah. That's about the only good point he had. Now I just want to vomit slightly less from his comments. I now have to vomit a bit more for making them strip naked

[@LizzyinSerendipity]

🙌👏👏👏

[@phoenixgirl70]

That was on the producers though, not Clare. There were “strip” dodgeball signs along the fence. They all had matching shorts. He should of taken it out on the show runners. He did what he did for attention.

[@Thebiggestchief]

I can’t believe the new game show that Jarvis invented

[@gavhoffman3165]

LOLLL

[@tacothealien9805]

I sense a woooosh about to happen

[@gavhoffman3165]

@@tacothealien9805 wait jarvis didnt invent this show ur so dumb

[@victoriawang1356]

@@tacothealien9805 it appears you are a prophet

[@birdie394]

@@victoriawang1356 The prophecy is not fulfilled until someone says woooosh!

[@RtistiqSkubie]

16:06 "Wait... Didn't you *lose?* " That absolutely fucking killed me! 🤣😂🤣😂

[@itsgabibelle]

the bachelorette: the entitled man baby show??!! holy shit??? every single guy on this show from the video thinks they’re so entitled to her

[@nojnavick]

Jarvis with a beanie on looks like the one black guy they hire in silicon valley

[@LordMangudai]

I'm pretty sure that's Jarvis' actual backstory

[@aworte3266]

He was lol

[@actionjackson3522]

Jarvis saying "My butt loves it" is all I need to buy a wallet.

[@gavhoffman3165]

I agree

[@paprikaa117]

It could work for a lot for different sponsorships

[@westein1282]

Just don't take it out of context.

[@actionjackson3522]

@@westein1282 Jarvis: This video is sponsored by Raid Shadow Legends. My butt loves it.

[@strangerofthe2067]

“Before Claire hits menopause, will she find love? Find out next time on The Bachelorette!”

[@guytorie]

Good to see the reprise of that Danny clip

[@cobalt.studios]

Before quarantine, my math teacher would take time at the beginning of class to give up the synopsis of the most recent episode of The Batchelor or Survivor

[@racermk8759]

I wish I had that teacher

[@GazMatic]

What a waste of time.

[@whimsicella]

me: never watched a single episode of The Bachelor or Bachelorette in my life also me: watches every single video Jarvis makes on The Bachelor or Bachelorette because I love ThE dRaMa

[@xtuffcookiex]

I went to school ( middle - high) with Ivan . He is so charismatic, funny and sweet guy to see him only be set as " one tone" was sad.

[@kathyzhong3664]

Update: Clare and dale have broken up lmao

[@spookyboy8127]

genuinely I wonder if any bachelor/bachelorette relationship will have a 10 year anniversary

[@victheimpa15]

I think only one of the bachelorette couples out of all have lasted... Idk tho I don't watch that show lol

[@MatroxMillennium]

"Be that onion. I love it." Ah, we have a Shrek fan, here.

[@brookiecookie472]

It could be a thing from the Carol Anne Duffy poem "Valentine"

[@ryleyo7675]

Dale breaks up with Claire What they expect: Nooo, I can't believe it! Reality: Oh No, Anyway Edit: I was right...

[@gavhoffman3165]

LOL TRUE

[@c12486]

bruh her name was on the screen like 60 times there's no i

[@alli2448]

Accurate🤣

[@myfriend1173]

@@c12486 ok

[@LipSyncLover]

Did dale break up with her already??

[@Militant_Vegan]

“What’s one thing y’all don’t know about Dale?” “Nothing, because he doesn’t stfu” That had me rolling 💀💀

[@TheAlexJohnson]

Claire and Dale lasted almost as long as Claire's Bachelorette tenure

[@brunoalejandroandrades354]

This doesn't make any sense but editing jarvis is hotter than regular jarvis

[@ya_fbr]

glasses

[@pixiestxNyomouf]

Me: Is it the glasses? Is it the beanie? Also me: Yes

[@hellothere-bo7bn]

it’s because he has glasses

[@williamcoursey3885]

It's called filters he's editing jarvis so that form of jarvis just makes himself hotter duh.(also I think editing jarvis doesn't like regular jarvis. Just a thought tho not confirmed.)

[@frankeastbrook2530]

No he is not

[@mariam.h.amer.]

Jarvis looking like a dad going to his kids' parent teacher conference is giving me life

[@NylaTheWolf]

HELP ME!

[@shezafiroz4442]

Jarvis is my only source of information on the bachelor/Bachelorette cinematic universe and I'm glad he is.

[@aminishnamedvaati]

disappointed she didnt just burst into song like a disney princess by the way she was dancing and all the animals showing when it was announced she didnt have the virus

[@HellyeahRook]

This is the only way I'll watch bachelorette, and I'm invested.

[@farsi1767]

Same. I could never watch the actual show because of how cringe inducing it is but i'll gladly watch someone comment on it

[@xingcat]

I think Elder Bachelorette would be fantastic. A series of delightful dates from people with decades of stories to tell, meeting the kids and grandkids from earlier relationships, etc.

[@baintreachas]

Plus they know what they want. Only you would have to be careful to filter out the people who miss segregation and whatever