COWORKERS ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS

COWORKERS ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS
When you think about how to get along with coworkers most people are actually wondering how to make friends at work - but the thing is coworkers are not your friends. Sure, you should get along with coworkers and having work friends at work can make the day more pleasant… it doesn’t always. Especially if you’ve ever gotten to the point where you said I hate my coworkers, and dealt with dramatic friends at workplace, you’ll know colleagues are not friends. Keep it professional and get along with your coworkers
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• COWORKERS ARE NOT YOUR...

[@Lilaliba88]

I would only add that it's not only important to leave your private life (talking about spouse, finances, any personal drama is strictly off limits) at home, BUT it's also crucial NOT to talk about your professional plans, like what you're really aiming for, side gigs etc. Just do your job properly and everything else is not your coworkers' business. Yes, there are exceptions and I am lucky to have some closed friends I trust and don't compete with anyways, but the vast majority of my colleagues are JUST colleagues. It's nice to have coffee them and exchange a lot of experiences like where can we have the best meals at or the most relaxing spa moments, how nicely the kids are growing, but that's enough. We can build nice and friendly relationships and support each other with a couple of good advices (if asked), but not on private matters. It's really bad when people are gossiping about their significant others at work, the person they should trust the most.

[@JenniferBrick]

Pinning this because you encapsulated this so well

[@Lilaliba88]

@@JenniferBrick thank you! Great video! And I meant *close friends, oups

[@mysterykitty587]

I feel like the most horrible person ever because ive fallen for this quite a few times and this is my first time watching a video or hearing this kind of thing out!! My co workers like gossiping and also will even talk of guys they're going out with. I had one person that was really bad about it and would have bad relationships or really bad experiences with guys talking about it at work and I think it was really bugging her or hurt so much she just had to talk about it but now that I think about it I remember feeling like it was very overbearing and even uncomfortable. But no one is perfect I to recognize now that id like to work on it too. I don't think I do it too often cuz I try to casually chat and make people laugh at work buuuuut I really do wish to work on not spewing out so much of my private life cuz I have a few times but I wish to never do it at all really. I'm gonna watch the rest of the video tho cuz I'm quite interested in what she has to say. :) I'm wondering if when ppl do gossip or share all sorts of private info if its cuz theyre so stressed about said thing and they struggle to find other healthy coping mechanisms or need to find ways to de stress to help not share so much. Or perhaps its a bad habit and its as simple as trying to be aware and catch urself before doing the over sharing. I know sometimes I'll feel regret, guilt, or embarrassed even wishing I didnt say so and so about a person cuz I probably don't know the whole story fot example or cuz I felt I overshared about myself or if it waz my significant other and thinking how dumb I was to share anything. I think it helps to really think about anything ur going to share and with who that is when it comes to co workers, especially when maybe many of them don't always do the same. I wished I didnt share quite a lot of info with co workers myself cuz then its like they get snippets of ur life but not the whole entire picture so then they may cast judgement or their view on ur life or ur loved ones that could make ur outlook grow more bitter to the circumstances even tho ur co workers arent ur life they dont live ur life in ur shoes and don't have the whole picture, only what you've decided to tell them.

[@dekippiesip]

I am basically a young dude among 40 to 50 somethings in my team. That has given me the impression that there isn't really this kind of competition. One of these senior coworker always helps me if I have questions. I think it's again different with a significant age difference. If he was about my age I could see some sort of competition arising. But I just don't see that now. What are your thoughts on such generational differences?

[@JENNIFERBOO]

Agreed 👍🏻 10000000%.

[@longislandny696]

As the saying goes,if they’re gossiping with you they’re gossiping about you.🙄

[@helenefrench4275]

Yes Amina, I have heard this saying. That s the reason I did not say anything dear :) Let people talk. There are still good one though but they r rare and unfairly mistreated

[@Frankya92]

Oh for sure. Even though it was tough and even at times almost impossible, I was that person that tried to keep to himself.

[@mitzithompson6585]

Absolutely 💯

[@yakopro49]

I can't lie but true.

[@yve5659]

🙌🏾

[@azenkwed]

I hate how coworkers pretend to care about each other, pretending to get along, do activities together and keep on pretending. This fake environment is so toxic to anyone who's truly genuine and simply cannot play the game. Ironically, being the genuine one can make YOU the bad coworker.

[@arjunchatterjee9362]

Should be a pinned comment

[@Selsmittenxo]

Happened to me. 🙃

[@MrKhalidyahya]

@@Scotland_Scorpion I hope you're okay now

[@lust4lyfe101]

100% agree, this needs more thumbs up

[@canadiansoviet]

100% facts. I'm glad I work a career that is solo now.

[@xw7239]

The coworkers who interrogate you the hardest about your personal life are usually the ones to be the most wary of

[@maitreyas.4902]

Oh gosh yes. I saw a coworker at Subway 10 years ago. And he was like how are doing? I said good . He said are you sure? What's going on with you? I said I'm about to buy a sandwich,bye.

[@pedromarques9267]

If someone is dangerous, they'll probably don't inquire that much about your personal life. They'll try to open you up to them and when you are comfortable with them they'll start extracting the information they really want

[@ThePeterDislikeShow]

Do you have any tips for how to hide being single in a mostly married workplace? I'm actually solosexual by the way so it's really offensive when people think I'm still looking and/or think I don't have a life outside of work.

[@frumtheground]

Yes! I'm dealing with this right now! This co worker thinks because he knows I have disabilities and so does he that I need to be an open book about it to him. But the only reason anyone knows anything is because it interferes with my ability to work sometimes. I don't want to be friends but I swear he's made it his mission to make us be friends. I just want work to stay at work. That includes my co workers. Most of them I really like. Just not him. Doesn't help that I'm the only single female there and I've only been there a few months.

[@M.L.official]

I feel like this is a bit overblown and people can benefit from understanding how to respond to these situations to make them completely irrelevant and minute. Like the lady in the video says, you interact with these people every single day and you see them more than anyone else in life (in a lot of cases). Especially for office jobs where the work is pretty social and easy which increases the likelihood of social interaction even more. It's actually in your interest to interact with them as much as you can for career progression because it will open up your job opportunities and networks. The gossip thing is always a factor but again it's not an issue. The big issues are: is your team toxic asf (micromanaging boss, lack of trust, etc.) If yes, you need to leave, simple as that. If person a said something bad about person b, you can keep that between you and that person or disengage or say things like 'ah maybe they had a bad day', etc. It's all about playing your cards right, you can't please everyone, and focus on yourself, it's not selfish.

[@mikes7446]

I have a lot of fake ass people at my job. They wonder why I’m so quiet… they think I’m anti social. I just don’t wanna deal with their drama and bs.

[@seductruss]

I feel you. I m two weeks in.

[@petscraftsandwonderfulthin1279]

What I've learned... is look like you're listening. Do a lot of smiling and nodding. Just giving small responses to be polite makes all the difference. They'll never even know whether you agree or disagree. They usually don't even care. Just wanna vent. Lol.

[@mikes7446]

@@seductruss you'll see even more in a month of few months.. p.s don't go drinking with coworkers.

[@Ejejesksjs]

@@seductrussSame, I want to keep it superficial as possible. I’m staying positive, doing my job, and only talking about things that relate to work.

[@Ejejesksjs]

@@mikes7446Also, if you want to stay drama-free as possible. Stay out of gossip and don’t say anything negative! Do your work and go home!

[@SeudXe]

When bosses say "we're a family here." I know it's gonna get much worse.

[@20-NYC]

Gonna get much worse how so

[@rachel12127]

Wowwww my last job!!! Let me tell u... it was a pain in the ass!!!

[@SeudXe]

@@rachel12127 what happened

[@FuckSlowShit]

That's what they all say at any job

[@abriannajohnson5576]

That means that everyone that works there knows each others business. Don't get sucked in!!

[@DianneElizabeth64]

Proof is when you leave the job and never hear from your “friends” coworkers again.

[@kimsands9280]

So true. I worked same school district for 30 years and I'm not in contact with any of them now.

[@mIcheLLeyyYy520]

Yup. I got laid off because of covid and my “friend” colleagues said nothing to me and didn’t talk to me at all after I left. Surprise, one of them called me last week (after almost a year of no contact) to ask for a favor and tried to mask it as “catching up with me.” 🙄🙄🙄

[@joylotsmore-mamademoji6729]

So true !

[@milkandspice1074]

@@mIcheLLeyyYy520 I have the same situation. I haven't heard from my job. I was never let go though. I suppose I should call them after a year of silence. A bit weird though, right?

[@llg3pe]

Amen to that! It always amazed me how people could be together all day everyday, act like friends, happy hours, etc, then when you leave, they never bother with you again

[@sonicmoore6196]

Co workers are the fakest people you would ever encounter. Don’t gossip or share your personal business with them they’re not your friends or family. Also not to mention don’t get too comfortable around these clowns as well.

[@hopeh1095]

I am learning the hard way, never never trust coworkers. When you see ppl to themselves at work try your best to become like them, it’s a job not a place to make friends or close connections. I’m still stock at this lady I trained. That’s why you do your job and get out of there.

[@sonicmoore6196]

@@hopeh1095 Facts. After my past experience with 2 jobs I worked before I’m never trusting coworkers ever again

[@popcorn0038]

you are a co worker to somebody. when you say "co workers are the fakest..." that makes you judge yourself

[@sonicmoore6196]

@@popcorn0038 Oh shut up 🙄

[@cazedit8439]

​@@popcorn0038 that's not in anyway judging yourself. *Some coworkers act like your friend but talk behind your back ⬅️ that's what you call fake

[@noqueq9003]

Sadly, the happiest people at work are usually those who share nothing personal, are aloof and focussed on their shift and then simply leave while also 'leaving the job behind' and out of their mind. The more involved you get in something, the more it affects you. Especially when you work somewhere that you dont even like.

[@entertainmentjunkie]

Honestly that’s so true! I’ve become pretty close with one of the people at my work and we get along really well and always are happy to see one another, etc, but I’ve already paid the price for that and I’ve over thought and over analyzed EVERYTHING in my head with this person so I can definitely relate to this. We keep it professional and nothing bad has happened, but it’s pretty difficult

[@yubelwish]

Yes ❤ I leave work at work. I don't want to see my coworker on my feed or hear their voice via personal cell on my off days. All my problems at home stay home so I don't have anyone coming to me reminding me about it at work when they're nosy. So when they do thier nonsense to "try" to shame me into doing what "they" want even through I'm following the rules I'm fine. Outside the office I don't need to interact with them & go hime in peace.

[@noqueq9003]

@@yubelwish I very much admire you for that. Even when I try to act like this, I'm unfortunately prone to absorbing all kinds of vibes and energies from others and lots of things will eventually affect me

[@SeanDoe409]

I personally find this to be true!!!!

[@sigmasiren777]

​@@SeanDoe409 same...literally my current experience.

[@shibaanimegameedits2961]

High school never ends after high school guys.

[@JenniferBrick]

Uggggh sadly sometimes so true!

[@shibaanimegameedits2961]

Jennifer Brick I was ..very naive and sheltered by strict parents at the Beginning. Luckily, I was smart enough to become the “keep to myself, neutral quiet girl” that no one considered a social threat, so nobody tried to ruin my reputation or framed me for anything. Kind of a defensive mechanism for having a narcissistic mother for emotional support for all of these years until I realized at 12 and the fact that I was naive to the point that people used me like a message dog. P.s. In my culture, people have the tendency to use religion to excuse the behaviors of a certain gender so talking to them isn’t gonna get you much help..go to a therapist or adapt and find ways to cope.

[@emilylynnnx4172]

Especially in nursing!

[@shibaanimegameedits2961]

Emily Lynnn x an older relative of mine warned me about it when I asked for advise in that career.

[@pennsylvanianrrfoamer]

This kind of high school drama in the workplace wouldn't even exist in blue collar jobs like steel mill, mines, factories, and auto assembly plants. High school drama is most-common in grocery stories, fast food jobs, and even low-paid retail jobs. How immature can your coworkers be?

[@Sam89365]

Coworkers are temporary. Be careful with temporary people.

[@schoolwork232]

Thank you for this!

[@helenefrench4275]

I could not agree more Same

[@john2011m]

Sometimes for 20 to 30 years

[@sickathanyouraverage4404]

Friends and family can be temporary too.

[@hayleycrawford2784]

Yes. I am becoming a lone wolf around these people. I don't reveal too much, I do my job and go home, and I am working to find ways of building my own life away from them. I must do this. I've been backstabbed so many times in my life.

[@yuhh530innamornin]

If you're a listener more than a talker you'll realize the majority of coworkers talk about each other when they aren't around. They can talk the most about someone 10 minutes before said persons shift starts, but when that person walks in, everyone acts like nothing was said.

[@typickoopakid]

I remember sharing something about myself that I was insecure about with a coworker because I thought we were close friends and I trusted them. The very next day, everyone else I worked with knew about it. Don't learn the hard way like I had to.

[@roar44879]

,

[@SnowLeopardForever]

This just happened to me. I told a coworker something work related but personal at the same time, and I specifically asked them not to tell anyone. Then I found out she told another coworker at work that she is close to what I had told her not to tell anyone! She is a sweet and kind person but now I know I can’t tell her personal things.

[@entertainmentjunkie]

There was something I told a co worker, but didn’t go into exact detail about it. Probably won’t because it’s not something I’d like to share and it could make people look at me differently

[@merakigemini]

😢😮😮😮

[@lildurk3004]

Im keeping my mouth shut and phone off. I was told i can keep it on but no, its off. Im not doing anything that they can use against me.

[@luigirnotyourbusiness8127]

Some coworkers keep asking personal questions, they pretend to be "nice", but in reality they are psychopaths

[@Shakyion]

I hate this. I don’t ask about their personal life so I don’t want to be asked. So mosey, the how was your weekend, how is your husband ? I hate it

[@luigirnotyourbusiness8127]

@@Shakyion you can always say, in a polite way "sorry, but that's none of your business"

[@Hollywood831000]

Luigi Rnotyourbusiness I agree. Whenever I’m confronted with personal questions I tell them that I’m a private person. Then they back off which is what I want them to do!

[@Hollywood831000]

Shaneil Miller You can tell them that you’re a private person. Look out for yourself! If you answer and give them details you may suffer later!

[@JenniferBrick]

Luisa & Shaneil are bang on, you can politely but directly let them know you want to keep your private life private. Another thing to try, is a one word reply. "Good" "fine" "okay" then ask another question. For example, if someone is asking about your weekend it may be because they really want to talk about THEIR weekend. "Or ttransition to work question or comment, "Did you see the sales numbers from the weekend? They were really impressive."

[@BruceLeroyUK]

I was once told, "I have worked with you for years yet know little about you, Mr Secretive." I thought... good, that’s how I want it to be.

[@xxsasunaruyaoi13xx]

Good

[@dang75790]

Lol someone said that to me before! Lol

[@rufdymond]

Word!

[@dictionplacement5467]

haha I always get the "you're so mysterious" as well but once they know they don't give a shit after

[@goodmorningsundaymorning4533]

Smart

[@ganktuh]

Since I was 18, coworkers were always at an arms length. Ppl thought I was being anti social but turns out I made the right decision according to this video. I'm 39 now and own a business.

[@MissChelle857]

I really hardly ever truly “get along” with anyone I work with, and I’ve learned to understand that this is WAY MORE THAN OK. Healthy boundaries need to be observed, and having a clear divide between my personal and work lives is SO IMPORTANT.

[@Yunyun33888]

I am so glad I am not the only person hates those coworkers.

[@YeshuasLuVd1two]

Learned this the very hard way.

[@starlightwhispers6781]

Felt like i was arrogant or something but realised they’re insecure wet blankets parading around with million-watt smiles to impress management

[@mercedeswilkins9085]

Yes and ever mix them. I hate seeing my boss and co-workers hanging out after work or hearing they hung out on their days off.

[@bacsolo3719]

I'm the same. And it's hard to if you don't get along with your co-workers as it can lead to mental health. Everyone will make it hard and almost impossible to work or stay at work. You can be nice quiet and act like you don't want trouble, but if you're not in the circle, then you're going to have a hard life. Well, that's just me.

[@mediacenterman8583]

I worked with 50-75 people for 13 years. I knew their children, saw them get married and signed their birthday cards. In 2017 I had to leave my job due to health issues. Two of those people have reached out to me. I am not even mad, just reminding people that coworkers are not automatic friends.

[@turdferguson7105]

It's like Facebook. Hundreds of people in your list, and not one of then go out of their way to learn more about you, or be there when you need them.

[@hdjfjd8]

@@turdferguson7105 realistically why even expect them to do so in the 1st place

[@sophisticatedmm3632]

Amen

[@Critique808]

mediacenter man This is why I don't offer car rides to co-workers if they ride the bus and I don't do favors for them.

[@Critique808]

@@turdferguson7105 I have the same problem with Facebook. People post everyday but they don't comment on your post or they don't talk to you.

[@christopherscott5567]

Everyone at work is not your friend. Do your job, get paid, go home.

[@lili11.11]

Yeah it's easy to say that. But I feel like it needs to be said to all the coworkers who ask SO MANY QUESTIONS, and basically INSIST on being part of your work day. If you show them no interest, you're then the girl with the attitude. That's why I'm trying to succeed at other routes of income. It never fricken works out with people........

[@Eg-jd9zt]

@@lili11.11 just keep the responses positive and they will just realize you’re not going to engage in negativity or drama but are also approachable for positive topics.

[@adu1991]

Probably. High school and college are most likely the LAST places where you can make authentic, organic friendships. Even after college you can make friends OUTSIDE of the workplace, but it does get harder as you get older. Keep your circle of friends small, or if you feel like you don't have any friends...get a pet.

[@adu1991]

@@lili11.11 I encourage asking questions pertaining to work, because it's part of how you get better at doing your job. If workers don't want to teach you anything, then they're selfish.

[@MsPopo81]

@@lili11.11 covert narcissists ask a ton of questions to size you up and use your weaknesses against you..

[@DisEnchantedPersons]

You absolutely correct. A coworker wants you out you are a threat to them, especially if you’re good at what you do

[@terrid8219]

So true! I just got fired from a job based on what a “friend” told our manager. Keep your coworkers at arms length. They can possibly through you under the bus for their own personal reasons. It happened to me.

[@shea_river]

same. like when you tell ur 'friend' something important going on in your life to vent and get advice and they take this info to management & use it against you to make themselves look good

[@shea_river]

also led to me getting fired for 'personal issues'

[@TaKarion48]

I just got in "trouble" for the same thing. Even though this person agreed with me as I expressed my opinions. The very next day I had a "Check in" with admin.

[@TJDW]

Damn that’s rough

[@Dave_of_Mordor]

i feel like this only applies to white collar jobs. never had this problem with labor

[@user-mw6wp6ce4p]

I love how you say" artificial closeness". Yes I had to learn the hard way. Go to work, keep your mouth shut and go home.

[@JenniferBrick]

There is certainly lot less drama when you go to work and focus on doing the job.

[@accountcompromised2166]

This is some of the best advice that I have heard in a long time. Basically do your job and go on about your own business.

[@patrickbonham949]

Good point 😏😎👍🥳

[@derekintrovert5619]

Amen so trueb

[@vivianperdue4329]

10 thumbs up !!! That how you do that !!!

[@totallyrave53]

Like my mom always say keep the work people at work.

[@JenniferBrick]

Your mom is wise 👏

[@ebonyeyed08ti]

I know that's the truth.

[@whattheeff5592]

Thanks for an idea

[@Sweetjunglequeen]

I wish I knew that

[@drunkensquirrel7545]

Amen! One of my bosses told me the same thing 30 yrs ago. He had a 24/7, stressful career, but he was always serene; by contrast, his 2 partners were quite disagreeable & short tempered. I asked him his secret. He said simply, "I leave my work life at work, and I keep my home life at home." I took it to heart. His wisdom greatly benefitted me.

[@kennethburton9165]

I spent a lot of years being naïve about my coworkers. I would share my life and how things were going, unfortunately the people that I thought I could trust ended up stabbing me in the back.

[@YeshuasLuVd1two]

I thought I was the only one. It’s good to hear many hear on this thread share they have to. I’m doing something about it now. No more. Not anymore!

[@Ejejesksjs]

It’s not a good idea to make friends at work because if they decide they dislike you, then you’re sharing all your info with them. It’ll turn left really quick!

[@Ejejesksjs]

It’s best to keep it superficial because whether they like you or not, it doesn’t matter because everyone needs to work anyways.

[@Ejejesksjs]

I had a coworkers not like me just because I wanted to go to college, they thought college people were dumb and thought it was only about debt. It wasn’t even something so serious or personal either. DON’T SHARE ANYTHING!

[@Ejejesksjs]

Currently have one manager out of 4 not like me but I say hey/bye, do my work. Listen to the manager than go home, as long as I get paid I’m fine. I’ve worked, shared personal info and realized that coworkers will not like you over the simplest things. I say hey/bye and keep it moving! It’s much less risky to make friends outside of work.

[@angieineverettcust2934]

I worked with a woman for 18 years. I went to her house several times. I was shocked when she left and informed me that we definitely were NOT FRIENDS 😮😢

[@user-jp9uw8wy4d]

Weird

[@Fourwindsofsuccess]

Lmao I hate to laugh but what? Y’all going to have to learn. These people be venting to y’all or just overheating stuff to get y’all in a state of mind as a venting fake buddy. Lord have mercy.

[@michaelnelson9211]

[@mida8261]

Sounds about right. I used to hang out with my old coworkers at my old job on the weekends. Left that job for a new one and suddenly they were "too busy." They were still doing the same thing; I was just excluded.

[@lind3237]

This is why I’m looking for a 100% remote job right now, tired of dealing with toxic co-workers.

[@sophisticatedmm3632]

I work remotely & certain colleagues still nit pick regarding dumb shit

[@Ana-gq7ce]

Same reason why I quit my previous job. Now I work for my own. Best thing ever

[@moafu]

I quit my job. As male in female toxic collective I last four months.

[@inthisworld414]

Working from home is the best thing that ever happened in my career.

[@BreaneNic]

Working from home has been a blessing. There are plenty of companies hiring for WFH jobs. Good luck on your search. Facebook has some great groups that will help you in your search.

[@kimsands9280]

My dad always told me "Just remember, people you work with are not your friends" He was so right.

[@manueloalzulfiquarali3688]

*FACTS!*

[@harrasingh998]

Biggest truth ever

[@journeymanX]

All the more reason why I’m an introvert at my work place Go in,shut up and work,do as the boss says and leave I do attend company outings/team buildings just to throw off any suspicions on being a complete loner,and to probe everyone

[@Bilbus7]

@@journeymanX That's exactly how I am. I work hard, never gossip, and just get shit done. However I do sometimes wish I was part of the "group" more to joke around and be more trusted.

[@dawnroberts6411]

@@harrasingh998 6q5is

[@blacjackdaniels200]

1) Knowing where to draw the line between your personal and professional life 2) Keep your info superficial..don’t tell people too much personal shit (which really is just still number 1) 3) Stay away from drama You’re welcome

[@felixrcandelaria]

I'm so so happy to come across this video. I've been saying this for years and people think I'm crazy. I 100% agree that coworkers are NOT your friends! Boundaries are necessary and important. I have mastered superficial work place conversation and it keeps me out of all the work place drama.

[@Ejejesksjs]

Yes, I have people talk about me but I have beef with no one!

[@danielcastillo4537]

It's funny when you hear your employers call you "team" or "we are family." Then you see them outside of work and they pretend they don't know you. Trust me. You don't need these people in your life.

[@co_7523]

Exactly.

[@diana_prince_1]

I hate that "rah rah, we're a team" bullshit at some workplaces. No we're not a family, i get paid to do a job, then i go home to my actual family.

[@danielcastillo4537]

@@diana_prince_1 I love seeing when they do slide shows at an end of year meeting with all your workers whilst Green Day's, "Time of your life" is playing. And you're not even in one of the pictures. It makes you feel special!

[@diana_prince_1]

@@danielcastillo4537 😬😑😆 I always try to make it a point to remember that 99.9% of the people don't actually care about me. They are there to get paid too. Keeps things simpler and avoids headaches and drama.

[@Ah-ed6ie]

I'm in a workgroup with people I never see at work but the "boss" says we're a team yet the conversations are bias.

[@hallezebrowski]

please...take it from me DO NOT accept your coworkers friend requests on social media. biggest mistake i ever made 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@JenniferBrick]

Oooch I detect there is a story behind this.

[@pennsylvanianrrfoamer]

we would like to hear the story behind this.

[@windlillylawson3944]

I shut down my social media pages

[@PurplePinkRed]

Mine too! Biggest mistake as well!

[@pennsylvanianrrfoamer]

The HR chick who is a narc, or narcissist pretty much said "people aren't here to make friends". I despise that same HR chick with a passion because she was a snake. Luckily I haven't seen her in almost a year and I would prefer not to see her again.

[@lomtiptak9519]

As a blue collar diesel mechanic, this kind of coworker relationship is completely different for us. Our work friends can be considered real friends. All of my previous jobs were because of connections and relationships I had made with good people in the industry. We look out for eachother because we all know we are there to eat the shit sandwich day after day. Obviously professionalism is important, but I feel as though a white collar office setting is a lot more hostile and superficial.

[@mb22256]

I miss welding because of the work environment. I can't do it anymore because of heath reasons but working white collar jobs make me want to kill myself. Everyone is so fake and lazy. These managers are a joke too. Idk how much longer I can take this. I want to go back to school though.

[@wobblebottom3632]

Nah. I have seen blue collar workers screw each other over. Hell one guy "forgot" to properly secure a bearing for a colleague due to a disagreement over union dues. The loose rotating shaft almost injured him when he was doing his PM route.

[@Tiredfella49]

Nope.

[@lomtiptak9519]

@@wobblebottom3632 unfortunately thats how most interactions involving unions tend to play out. I have seen some shady shit go on also.

[@Shadbraw]

Been different from my experience. It has always been my objective to work in a white collar job. Ever since I graduated college , I have had to work blue collar jobs to earn money while waiting for a more white collar one. I’ve always felt like a fish out of water because I don’t talk, act, or have the same interests as my coworkers. I feel as though I’m always being judged as a guy who “doesn’t want a real job” and would rather work at a desk and computer than work using my hands. I’m not saying all blue collar workers are like this, not even close, but holy moly I feel this every day at work.

[@Sisima13]

I don’t see why people would give this video a thumbs down, she speaks the truth, your coworkers are not your friends no matter how much you want them to be 😂. I honestly never started a new job with the mentality of "I’m going to befriend my coworkers"

[@brian.jrmontoya3227]

Very situational though, it’s not an end all be all. Sometimes people become close friends with their coworkers, sometimes they don’t.

[@MysticDivinerLJ]

@@brian.jrmontoya3227Exactly. I personally like the video.

[@michaeldennis4488]

Coworkers are the motivation to develop a life outside the job.

[@thatswhatisaid8908]

Underrated comment!

[@TheTherekrap]

I interpreted that in two ways 1) you really like your coworkers and would like to expand your relationships outside of work 2) you realize that there's a life outside of your career and you want to expand your interests out of work and your colleagues.

[@michaeldennis4488]

My comment should be more clear. My apology. I meant you should develop a life with interests and stress relief outside of the daily, work world so you can shake off negative coworker interactions. I work in a field with several A type personalities and it can be a bit hostile and negative if you do not agree with the group. Thanks for your point and the opportunity to clarify it.

[@Emanuel-XIII]

I felt this yesterday, new job new co workers

[@acaciagirl]

THIS !!

[@Dario_Mazzella1975]

I look at coworkers as I did friends in high school. As soon as you graduate or you leave your job they eventually disappear from your life.

[@celestinalunar6902]

Must’ve had not good coworkers. I still chat with some of my coworkers from my last job for time to time.

[@arnieg4129]

I’m always wondering why that happens 🤔

[@h2t26]

Teens usually think their friends will be friends forever, even putting them above family. When it should be the other way around. I talk to some coworkers for a while after they leave. We never hangout outside though. I never get that close. It's a situationship.

[@reminiscer15]

I agree, I think people say they'll keep in touch just to be polite and make saying goodbye less awkward. Easier to say lets keep in touch rather than just say well bye then, nice knowing you.

[@stephengreen5865]

@ dario garcia I agree it happens to me alott

[@DanielCamargoTalks]

Based on my experience, this approach to coworkers is true 80% of the time. The other 20% is the coworkers who actually remain friends after you leave, and actually spend time with you throughout your life.

[@Fourwindsofsuccess]

Facts. All facts here.

[@Michelle_Michelle___]

I used to have a passion for working in higher education, but I had literally the worst team experience ever. From the supervisor down to the co-workers. And now I’m considering switching career paths. Absolutely hateeeeee my co-workers. Just a bunch of people who think they’re important and smarter than everyone.

[@Ruth_45]

People in workplace are fake.I thought they were my friends and they shared my secrets with everybody

[@JenniferBrick]

I'm sorry you got burned 😢

[@steph-7696]

Same happened to me! Multiple times. Can’t believe it’s so common.

[@ashisdalai7597]

Ohhhh thanks for ur valuable tips I m new to corporate world

[@austincruz9651]

I feel you and I agree with you 100%.

[@ajithsidhu7183]

@@JenniferBrick hi cancy do one how to behave in work

[@BradLongCo]

Totally true! Colleagues are not friends and the company is NOT your family! Excellent content as always!

[@dresser6135]

I'm retired, but I realize that if I were doing my work life again I would just think of it as a performance. Just do the job to the best of my ability & be polite & pleasant to co-workers but not have any great expectations of close/trustworthy relationships. Just keep it professional.

[@jasonstemley1232]

Facts! Some jobs try to brain wash you or manipulate you making you believe that we are all in one family. The person on the top doesn't care about people on the bottom. His or her bottom line in production. An end to a mean.

[@singingwindrider9881]

then why go to work?

[@dresser6135]

@Cynthia Murphy That is a very lovely thing for you to do...your mother is very fortunate to have you.

[@glaycer5694]

True dat!

[@Cam70868]

Coworkers will act like friends but there’s no foundation of friendship except that both of you are there to WORK. I love this video! Wish I could communicate with you about a traumatic work situation I’m experiencing

[@user-dn9vd9xg9p]

She is so correct! I am old enough to know that colleagues will hang on your coattail to succeed, steal your ideas, and yes no matter what they will tattle tale or embellish to make themselves succeed. You have to always have your guard up. Never indulge your vest cards with them. Always only business. Yes you will be left out of their private cliques and parties but who the hell cares? But you will succeed if you follow this gal's advice. And if they succeed beyond you they will have no relationship with you. Folks, people have agendas at work and most of the time it's an agenda to be promoted.

[@existentiallifecoach2024]

I learned my lesson the hard way with coworkers. I was too transparent and authentic as a supervisor. Those underneath me used that as leverage to begin their vindictive assault on me. They reached their targeted goal at an “off-duty” event not work-related but they brought it back to work to use against me. As a life coach and consultant, I was taught to be real with people and that would build trust. Not as a supervisor...too much legalism and liability involved. Now, I follow the Japanese three face rule: 1) There is a face you show to the public and workplace. 2) There is a face you show to your family and friends. 3) There is a face you keep within you and no one else should know about.

[@tommyjones1357]

All three faces have one thing in common: Honor. Anyone without honor can get out.

[@multipassionproject]

I like this!

[@hannacook859]

Nice

[@themacocko6311]

Videos and attitudes like this are the reason we need the 3 faces. If we didn't have the 3 faces, we wouldn't need the faces.

[@KiARa-kn9hr]

Yep! and if if you keep to yourself at work and not join the clique, these vindictive people will still find a way to stir the pot…

[@ralphpinkins5619]

My experience: I worked at a job for 12 years . Developed a lot of strong relationship with my coworkers or so I thought. I left the job for a better one , NOBODY called or knew me anymore. No contact nothing. And even bad mouthed me. Your coworkers don't care about you .

[@80sidd]

Nobody cares except family and some friends

[@patsmith36]

Let me guess they were prolly trumpers

[@Yriel129]

Sounds like petty jealousy too. I'm going with an assumption here that you were not talking about a managerial or an expert position because you said it was a "job". When managers and experts leave, we give them a warm send-off with cake and perhaps even speeches and when regular workers leave, the old and bitter veteran workers start gossiping as soon as you're out the door lol.

[@izidorsuc]

My experience is exactly the same as above. Ex co-workers don’t recognize me anymore. What’s worse is that we seem to be actively avoiding each other.

[@TokyoACR]

@@patsmith36 bruh, it has nothing to do with politics. 🤦‍♀️ People just suck regardless of where they stand politically.

[@yoshtopia8046]

No I don’t want to hangout I’m here to work. I’ll do my work, you do your work and we will be fine 👍

[@rebeccashoffstall1584]

I refuse to make friends with people I work with - it never ends well. Instead, I am professional and friendly but don't discuss anything but work.

[@JenniferBrick]

It sounds like you have found the boundaries that work for you.

[@AmazinMusicNYC]

Me too.. I do this to I only work for a paycheck

[@Tinyfurball]

I do, too. But for some reason. Whether I have said Hi or not to someone. My name gets passed around. Only because I'm quiet.

[@sassy1972ful]

@Cynthia S The positive is that you learnt. Keep your head up.

[@bobbiellison4315]

I completely agree. Problem for me is people are intimidated by quiet private people. I smile and exchange pleasantries but have no interest in anything beyond that. After a while animosity is created and coworkers will stop even talking to me about work related topics. Always trying to be dragged into gossip or divulging your personal life story. I dont want any of it. I am there to work then go home.

[@cactusray3368]

The worst is when one works for an employer that tries to promote the idea of the "work family".

[@JenniferBrick]

I have a lot to say (and rant about on this one). It was going to be my next video but after editing I feel like it's too ranty and didn't offer enough solutions, but keep your eyes out cause a video on this is def coming!!

[@Redflowers9]

Oh god yes, fuck them lol

[@mibi5041]

they tried in my company once to give this "family approach", but noone believed in it 😁

[@cactusray3368]

@@mibi5041 Happy to hear that!

[@cactusray3368]

@Goetz Dushlan I can relate to your experience. The whole "work family approach is about manipulation. IMHO

[@chrisp187]

I had to call in sick for work, once, and had to confess a health issue I was extremely ashamed of. The next day I heard my health issues echoes to me by a colleague I almost never talked to. Even though I asked my boss not to tell anyone. I felt humiliated, but I never said anything.

[@cgtcne]

I’m sorry you had to experience that ❤

[@angeloflifewonders9380]

I'm sorry.

[@mercedeswilkins9085]

Boss told them

[@artsyminecrafter745]

Should of sued for defamation. Look it up. Gossip that does harm in the workplace is considered slander in a court of law, including emotional damage.

[@chrisp187]

@@artsyminecrafter745 trust me, I would like to; but I wouldn't get much. Even if I through in being illegally fired. Which I was.

[@emilylouise9705]

I feel like this is one of the reasons why it can be so difficult to do an office job as an autistic person. I really struggle with judging social situations and identifying what is or is not oversharing, what is or is not appropriate to say. I learnt the hard way that the easier thing for me to do is just not share anything. I don't talk about my hobbies, family, interests, anything. My coworker asks "What did you do at the weekend?" I'll just say something bland like "I just relaxed at home" and not go into detail. It's too much of a minefield.

[@yoursubconscious]

my thoughts: "I work with you nearly every day, I don't need to hang out with you."

[@JenniferBrick]

I feel you on this one!

[@yoursubconscious]

@@anikokovacs6163 thank you ☺️

[@benmollitor3776]

My supervisor at work asked me 3x to move in with her...

[@yoursubconscious]

@@benmollitor3776 wow! ya, that is a little much

[@Frankya92]

@@benmollitor3776 I went to dinner with my plant manager 3x. The first time it was unexpected because apparently we have the same hangout spot and the other 2 were planned. However, I regretted doing it because he was an unprofessional bully with a blabber mouth.

[@jennypennylane5851]

Two very important quotes to remember.... "When people show you who they are, believe them." and "Be careful who you tell your feelings to. Some people can't wait for the opportunity to use them against you." Very true.

[@ladyindaroom]

You are on the money with this comment

[@irisrose4732]

I learned that the hard way.

[@sayedarumi8736]

Very true..😞

[@baldeagle4710]

absolutely. there are things i choose not to share with my coworkers, i learned from my last job that people can turn on you at any second no matter what your relationship was with them prior. no one is loyal to you at work.

[@zeusteriyakijiizasutairyok5695]

Narcissism

[@andreyasimpson1736]

This is something i struggle with in every workplace!!! I wear my heart on my sleeve and it’s hard for me to put boundaries up especially when i get close to people there & spend 40hrs a week with them 😂😂

[@D34M0N1CU5]

Great video! This is something that is often forgotten by other career advisors. I have the motto: "My family members are the people with whom I'm related by blood, my friends are the people with whom I choose to hang out with in my spare time, my colleagues are the people who just happen to be working for the same employer." Funnily enough my favourite coworker has the exact same view about colleagues not being friends.

[@jaydenp4975]

Don’t get too involved with people at work. So true and people still get way too involved with coworkers. Their loyalty lies with who signs your paychecks, not your friendship with them. Don’t trust ANYONE.

[@traceylennon1204]

Great sound advice!!

[@billytheripper4]

Currently teaching a colleague this lesson. He doesn't pay my wage 😉

[@jaydenp4975]

Those coworkers will say bad things about you to another coworker then smile at you as you walk in the room. 👹😈

[@mismissy]

Learning the lesson the HARD way

[@latoyiab79]

Yes!!

[@Mach_D666]

Make your money and go home co workers are toxic.

[@JenniferBrick]

In fairness, not ALL coworkers are toxic.

[@lamzy3773]

@@JenniferBrick Yah, true not all. But majority are.

[@matthewsmith2787]

I honestly think many would quite happily you quit your job, to save their job

[@justines1919]

Not having boundaries with them is toxic lol 😂 it’s forced interacting with a bunch of random weirdos lol

[@katemiller7874]

Not true at all

[@missmariiiii]

I actually have 2 really solid friendships I made at an eeeasy job. We basically bonded over knowing our job was bad/temporary lol. Now, we’re all onto better things and hangout regularly.

[@lw4294]

Maybe because there was no competition on that job there

[@GodWokeMeUp]

I agree, I worked at a Christian school and there was a teacher who kept over stepping my boundaries. I make it very clear that I'm at a job to "work" for a living and go home to my family. I do not want to share my personal information or have any sort of out of work relationship with people. I've already got my people outside of work... And I do not want to see my colleagues more than I already do.

[@marvinhagler4721]

Most are sneaky, backstabbing, snitches with no life.Very immature and clickish.AVOID AT ALL COST, BECAUSE THEY ARE ALWAYS HAPPY WHEN YOU GET IN ANY KIND OF TROUBLE AT WORK

[@roh2015]

You summed it up great, totally agree

[@janellephoenix4378]

100% true!

[@courtneywright328]

Yep!

[@Ramen551]

@African Sun thanks for the warning , especially ima start at my federal job soon

[@mikimiki6202]

@@Ramen551 you really need to watch

[@lifeiswonderful22]

Let's be honest, people go to work because they need to survive.

[@sitinazariah9097]

... after so many denials like 'self actualization', 'professional experience' and things like that. Some are just too proud to simply admit that they are just need money to continue their life. That's it

[@icemike1]

.

[@justinallen2408]

@Richard Schiffman exactly not sure of anyone who thinks work is better than just about anything else they could be doing

[@falanu103.]

That's such a tabu in France. Only a few works are socially oriented (they were...) but the money is of course à motivation too. Why are you interested in....you have to hide the truth there. Talking about how much money you will make isn't competence sign. I worked in Germany, that's completly different. But the psych aspect is different too. There is not as much negativity about your personal life there as in France. I mean, everybody see you in town or on parties. There is no problem when you get out with a Guy, or many guys cause work still be your priority before reputation or gossips. I remember i laughed with my coworker cause i had a regular one in France and i met 2 guys in Germany. She said you are French 🤣🤣 they are really funny and it wasn't displaced. As i came back (i remember sending some mails) i was a whore. I never regreted to learn German and having a passion for this country. I mixed 2 cultures my life long i am homeless in my own country...

[@lifeiswonderful22]

@@falanu103. wat

[@melanywin9656]

Excellent advices! I will surely keep it in mind. We often forget that even tough some coworkers are friendly this does not mean they are your friends

[@elizabethrayne5179]

Thank you. One of the things I got slammed for in my former corporate life was not being actual friends with my colleagues and not chatting about useless nonsense during work hours. Why? It was seen as “lack of collaboration“ when I just wanted to concentrate on, you know, my job. Tell me more about how Kardashian talk is collaboration.

[@deep4630]

I had the same experience !😢

[@BritishSoundboardPranks]

Lesson one: coworkers will stab you in the back in heartbeat, for their own personal again or if you fall out of favour with other colleagues (or for no clear reason at all). Lesson two: do not ever, under any circumstances, get involved with, or take sides in, other people's dramas. Lesson three: never confide in a coworker with personal things, or secrets - unless you are content that these things will be shared with at least one other coworker (at least). Lesson four: never talk about other colleagues at your desk, or anywhere in the office - there's always somebody listening, even if they look like they're not. Lesson five: there is a clear line between a work friend and a real friend - while legitimate friendships, formed at work, are possible they are the exception. Summary - most people in the workplace are not your friend!

[@bilalhamurabi3362]

you should not gossip about anybody actually

[@BritishSoundboardPranks]

@@bilalhamurabi3362 Talking about somebody or something that has happened is not always gossip. It's human nature to want to discuss things from time to time, which could involve talking about another - especially if somebody feels they've been done wrong or mistreated by somebody. The point was, if you must, is to ensure this is done in absolutely privacy and never somewhere you could be overheard (where chinese whispers, or misinterpretation could be spread by a listener).

[@beebee58589]

None of them are your friends!!

[@omnipop4936]

Lessons 1 and 3 really hit me hard.

[@fargeeks]

@@bilalhamurabi3362 i did that one time and that person who i was talking about pulled over during our shift just to have a word with me about what i said about her.

[@msknowitall4085]

Fantasy land is believing ppl wont speak poorly of you if you're nice

[@JenniferBrick]

Great point. It's so much more about them and has nothing to do with you, thank you for highlighting this!

[@kevin080592]

I have lived in a fantasy land for so long.. I learned it the hard way

[@StevieSparkZ]

This is true, but other people's opinion of you is not your business anyways.

[@msknowitall4085]

@@StevieSparkZ everything is my business

[@matthewsmith2787]

I think people will always talk behind your back, even if your nice.

[@SophieLovesSunsets]

100% agree with this video. I feel it's so important to understand the difference between being friendly and actually being friends with someone. Being friendly (in my opinion) is being a good coworker, being a team player, being helpful and cooperative, but becoming friends with someone is inviting them into your private life, sharing personal information with them and in the work place that's not wise, it blurs boundaries. Every workplace I've ever worked, even when I was in college, I've always made my excuses to spend my lunch hour alone, and I know this may sound unsociable and aloof to some people, but in doing this, I've never had any drama or arguments with coworkers, and let's be honest, some workplaces can be very catty. And perhaps this is just me, but I don't like having friendships that are solely based around work, when I finish work on a Friday evening I like to draw a line under it until Monday morning. I don't like constantly talking about work in my free time. Most of my friends are people I've met through my hobbies and interests outside of work.

[@aceways4771]

Love this. Subscribed. You’re amazing at explaining and have fantastic energy. I’m too naive and always fall for this, then get disappointed when they turn out to not be friends or not even remember my name a few weeks later.

[@theantt21]

I’m more of a listener than a talker and I gotta say it’s hard to be friends with your co workers when you hear them be friendly to someone but talk bad about the same person behind their back.

[@arbitrarylib]

Mhm

[@whereisyourhumanity7557]

I feel so badly when that happens. I used to do that, I was so two-faced, about stupid stuff like "those shoes with that dress." There were some ignorant and misguided reasons why I thought I was supposed to act like that. It took real life lessons to teach me to be better. I'm grateful that I learned fast.

[@Brook_Nichelle]

100%

[@spirituallydivineevibess]

word everyone talks shit abt everyone at my job I know people talk about me and still say hi to me funny lmaoo

[@rivonnediaz91]

@@whereisyourhumanity7557 Why did you feel you had to act this way? What was the life lesson?

[@lostintheflurry]

Dont ever talk about yourself at work. End of story.

[@legalfictionnaturalfact3969]

yep. no pics, no posters, nothing personal on desk. stark, clean, functional. short, vague answers to questions. meanwhile, record all conversations and dig for blackmail material whenever you can on whomever you can. never know when it will come in handy. like handy enough to make you some decent $$ in court.

[@milan51259]

@@legalfictionnaturalfact3969 Working in office means war. Mind games are played, people mobbing eachother to "climb a ladder" which doesn't even exist. People gossping their asses off. If you don't play in this rules and only do your job as efficient as possible, you will be mobbed out sooner or later. Happended to me too. Still. They can all go to hell from my pov as I'm now millionaire trough investing. I hope they don't develop and stay like they are, so they can create their own hell and be in agony their whole life while I trive.

[@milan51259]

@@legalfictionnaturalfact3969 Your psychological health already suffered a lot I guess. Try building up your body instead 3x a week with a compound movment training plan. Additionally read Stoic philosophers to get a better understanding how to deal with people and purify yourself from bad, unnecessary thoughts. Next step is to read everything you can from investing, maybe you can make money with this too (just don't yolo your money somewhere, it's dangerous at the moment). Wish you the best!

[@legalfictionnaturalfact3969]

now AS I SAID: the workforce is not here to turn profit, or else it would reward and incentivize talent. it does not. this is because the workforce is a control structure. its primary purpose is enslavement. so they hire a bunch of sociopaths and nutcases who think eating pastry and sh itti ng buzzwords = running a business. everything the govt claims to have invented was invented by individuals and then stolen by the state. inventors are CRUSHED by patent trolls all the time, and we wonder why the best we can do is el on aristrocrat dum b ass mu sk promising to blast kids off to mars in a decade or so as he currently blows up rocket after rocket? lmfao. yeah, long term profit is not the name of the workforce game. if it were, the conditions would be comparitively quite nice. and stalker creepo ganger-upper-ers wouldn't hold exec offices.

[@supermom9271]

I’ve learned the hard way and I do feel like everyone has their own goals and it’s best to keep quiet as hard as that may be. Especially when you grew up in a completely different city and have no close friends near by. Where do you make real friends. The person I was close to became a supervisor so now we can’t hang out.

[@janetpugliesi3203]

I fully agree 👍👍👍 do not make this mistake!!!!You are so on point and if people are wise they will listen to you...this is coming from someone who had something blow up in my face big time and that person's true colors came through!! So please please believe her!!!!Thank you for your video...

[@flutterdie780]

Thank you for this! We should always keep ourselves in check cause oversharing is so easy 😭😭😭

[@yasminalibazoglu3424]

Be nice but don’t get too close and never talk about your personal life, be evasive and be a good listener, nothing more!

[@JenniferBrick]

Being a great listener is an excellent skill and very helpful in career success.

[@Elcherino123]

I like it short and sweet. Why dont they teach us this in high school instead of calc, algebra and trig

[@LiLGouda.]

That's clever and wise 👌 love it

[@estagayle7794]

Good advice 👌👌👌👌

[@mosijahi3096]

@@Elcherino123 because your parents a suppose to do that. School is not meant to teach you everything not can it.

[@PeachesLemons]

I’m guilty of getting carried away with trying to make friends at work. Needed this video. Colleagues only gather info to use against you when needed.

[@idiotsandwich4912]

Me too. I’ve had the place I work at shoe me this recently. I started sharing about myself and my struggles thinking we could all relate... but then the managers used my own weaknesses against me multiple times. I told them I had anxiety and now they use that against me constantly.

[@sy_dianne5224]

So true, I was backstabbed by a colleague with whom I (thought) I had a great relationship.

[@MsPopo81]

Classic covert narcissistic personality playbook.... Gather as much info about you to use for their own abusive tactics later on if they cant control you. What a sick society...

[@violethighley5978]

Same! Some people can't look past their jealousy.

[@earlaweese]

*They’re fake. Proof that God doesn’t exist and neither does intelligent design. This is dumb design. Humans all collectively lack insight/intuition. Otherwise, everyone would get along.*

[@der2627]

This message was super deep. This explains why all my coworkers has flaked on me hanging out. then I came across this video. I feel like you change my life. Thank you! 🔥

[@Monica-Brown]

Are they married? They might be with a controlling woman that won’t let them ever go out. I know because I know a woman, her man cheated on her, and now she never lets him go hang out with co-workers. It might not be you. They might just be too embarrassed to say it’s their woman that won’t let them

[@djo6055]

SO TRUE-I tell my sis this ALL the time. I am gregarious and social, but at work, I'm professional and quiet and I work off in aseparate area to stay away from the toxic incessant/mindless chatter that can drain me. My sister wats friends at work and it turns ugly often. I bring treats sometimes as I bake, but I don't get involved in the talk, (mostly OPINION that folks toss around like they are speaking fact.)

[@infonomics]

The more people that I've met at work, the more that I value my time away from them. Coworkers are more tolerant from afar--the further away, the greater the tolerance.

[@daskamu]

100000% agree

[@dede2391]

❤️

[@fargeeks]

i had two coworkers who were waiting for me to get to the yard and then they confronted my about the way i was driving and then afterwards told the safety trainer and dispacth about what i did and sure enough i got a talking to. what i dont get is how female coworkers keep in touch with each other

[@somethinggrand144]

Lol

[@EnterpriseTNG]

This is interesting. Can you elaborate?

[@cesarbolet2181]

Be polite but brief. pay attention to those who are too friendly, fast talkers, too charming, and those who give shady advice... you are not there to make friends, you are there to make money and go home. keep them out of your social media, best practice is not to have social media.

[@JenniferBrick]

I agree that not having workmates on personal social media is a good idea. However what you said about fast talkers... I think I'm offended haha.

[@matthewsmith2787]

Social media is great when used responsibility

[@diana_prince_1]

💯💯

[@helenefrench4275]

Well said Jennifer. Thank you :)

[@helenefrench4275]

I could not agree more Cesar. Thank you:)

[@willowingwhispers2612]

Yep. Sit back and watch how your coworkers talk about other workers behind their backs and then understand that they're most likely doing the same behind your back. It's why I keep my coworkers at arms length and I don't hang out with them outside of work. I'm polite and friendly to them, but I sure as hell wouldn't consider them friends.

[@dr.andmrs.phibes7454]

This was eye opening. Thinking back over the 40 years that I have been in the work place, I have had very few real friendships that lasted beyond my end date at a particular job.

[@DonRobertson82]

in a world where you see coworkers more than your own family..... something is horribly wrong

[@dennismclaurin1487]

That's the way of the system

[@bluBlaq33]

@@dennismclaurin1487 it needs to change it’s ran so robotically and unnaturally.

[@protokhaniapetos3158]

Not if your family sucks 🤷

[@DonRobertson82]

Coworkers are fake to your face. Those you work with will back stab you to climb that ladder.. and will disappear when a new job arises. Co workers are NOT your friends. They are fake people you pretend to get along with so you can make a living and not starve.

[@thebacheafghan]

@@bluBlaq33you asked for it , you got it..

[@christy7698]

What sucks the most, is when you think you have made a friend at work but find out you were wrong. Because once you leave the company, that person wants nothing to do with you because they are too "busy" to talk to you. I learned my lesson the hard way so I just keep my distance from everyone.

[@fargeeks]

yes i couldnt agree more , hell i once had a coworker tell me that if i leave then she wanted to end all communications between us whatsoever, and boy was she serious! even going as far as to tell me to stop looking through her stories on instagram (public post) as if i became one of those people that are despised for life and the worst part is that i thought we along quite well as she once told me she liked me alot

[@katgreer6113]

Keep your distance? Aren't you sad and lonely that way?

[@katgreer6113]

@@fargeeks damn...

[@fargeeks]

@@katgreer6113 I don't get what you said but this was a few years ago going on to this day

[@mikelisteral7863]

remember ladies, dont serve a husband but serve a male boss at work. and call it progress.

[@coreyself2983]

Agreed! I made a "friend" at work. It caused so much drama, so much embarrassment, on top of all the work I already had to do

[@smokinjazzguitar]

This is a great video on a very important subject assuming you value your job and peace of mind. In my experience, the most annoying and bothersome coworkers are those that can't stayed focused on their work and their responsibilities. Employees often get frustrated with management or their coworkers, easy to always find something wrong with everyone else but themselves. I think that says it right there.

[@smexyapman]

Took me waaaaay too long to learn this lesson. I overshare and it is a HUGE problem. People lose so much respect for you, even if they are going through and doing worse in their own life. Kinda crazy, but it is what it is.

[@salembookworm]

Had the same problem just today. Sometimes you have to learn things the hard way until it clicks.

[@emilyfvdksvk2629]

Me too. I used to share too much info about my personal and school life. Never doing that again.

[@lusianacaucau9094]

So true

[@sandrachatindo4491]

Me too i'm still in messy just want help

[@Nayaana86..]

THIS! I wish I learnt this some time ago🤦‍♀️

[@ahmedhashmi3584]

My mom used to tell me when I was working corporate that just work, and go home..nobody is your friend at work..and don’t work longer than you have to during the day unless you’re being paid

[@MrPenetroso]

Good advice

[@ahmedhashmi3584]

@Gully Gil it always has been about the money

[@ahmedhashmi3584]

@@ra803g6 that’s a lot coming out of you with nothing to show for yourself...

[@goodmorningsundaymorning4533]

That's wisdom right there.

[@fargeeks]

@Gully Gil i just overtime for the money, even if this means im only making myself more of a favarable tool

[@kentaroo.7759]

I wholeheartedly agree! I don't have friends at work, I have coworkers that's it! I've told them that, no fluff. I never hung out with them in a social setting parties, get together, and whatever. I would rather be alone.

[@dennismclaurin1487]

Interesting comment

[@r.pres.4121]

That is exactly how I was and still am today. I want nothing to do with the cliques.

[@4islandbeauty]

Most of my jobs in my early 20s I met some lifelong friends. It wasn’t until I began working at corporate that I no longer remained friends with any of my colleagues. Didn’t realize how naive I was and how competitive some of my peers were, needless to say I learned the hard way but glad I learned!!

[@kimberlyball9696]

My coworkers have finally gotten used to the fact that my personal life is off limits. I'm nice, I'm approachable, but what I have going on outside of work is no one's business. A boss for a previous employer harassed and tried to put more work on me than others because I wouldn't put her in my business and hang out with her and the rest of the office for drinks. I filed a lawsuit and won.

[@karaboblu]

Kimberly, you and I are the same person. I love people but my brain compartmentalizes stuff. Work is work, and I can't mix it up like some people do

[@fizahaque]

@@karaboblu lol same here so I totally get it. 😊

[@cere29adames2]

🙌👏💪

[@julians9070]

You did the right thing Kimberly Ball. No coworker has the right to know you private life outside work. It sounds like an employer that is not woth working for.

[@mercuripietro6888]

good for you soooo many people get harrased and get away whit it

[@BeYounique...Maryanne]

Agree, 100 percent! I was at my dream job for seven years and didn't really associate with my co-workers. A managing editor scolded me and said that I alienate people because I didn't want to hang out after hours. Wrong. I just didn't like them very much. They were gossipy and not much fun. But I did become friendly with a very hip elderly woman who was very young at heart. We went to concerts and plays together. She was so much fun and we genuinely liked each other. And she was the most supportive in the workplace. At her funeral, her daughter had to comfort me; I took it her death very hard.

[@mauricioramirez9744]

Sorry for your loss.

[@BeYounique...Maryanne]

@@mauricioramirez9744 Thank you so much. She was so beloved and is so missed.

[@cosmosprincess20]

A very similar thing happened for me with an old man I worked with. When he passed I took his death harder than I thought. We really did get along as friends and in many ways he was my mentor

[@ishmael802]

The last part is sad man.

[@MaryamKhan-vf3zo]

Genuine people are rare and if you find one even at work .. it's good to socialize!

[@tartman540]

My coworker is certifiably insane. She whispers bad things about me while standing right beside me. Nightmare stuff. 😄

[@davidlampe4153]

It’s a fine line between talking about your job or sabotage of your career when speaking with coworkers. Kiss “ keep it simple stupid “. I’m bombarded by people who dislike their coworkers and they just can’t shut up about it. It’s not professional and some very otherwise talented people are going to be in for a rude awakening. Nice job with your presentation! I’m new to your channel but looking forward to seeing other videos on KZbin concerning these interactions. Very insightful.

[@britte813]

So my mother had one major rule when she was working. " Don't make enemies at work, because she has to work with these people." Basically she tried to get along with people , didn't talk about co workers behind their backs and she'd never let people know that they've annoyed her. She had almost no drama in 32 and half years of work. When she'd get transferred to other offices people were sad to see her go. She knew which coworkers were real friends and which ones were just someone she worked with.

[@mikelisteral7863]

remember ladies, dont serve a husband but serve a male boss at work. and call it progress.

[@Sernival]

@@mikelisteral7863 kek

[@Sernival]

It's impossible not to make enemies with someone at work, there's people who go out of their way to treat you poorly if they don't like you and that's only gettin worse in narcissist America

[@britte813]

@@Sernival Yeah, true. My mother may not have had many enemies but my Dad kinda was the opposite. He got into various disagreements with others during his career. He had friends at work but he also had "enemies". They were probably just rivals though.

[@rastaboi8864]

Love this

[@Joeyblondewolf2]

I worked at a place of 60+ co-workers. But I only considered 2 of them actual friends. Even after I left that job we still keep in contact. I picked only them because they were the only ones who never brought drama at work and we're professional.

[@JenniferBrick]

It sounds like you chose wisely!

[@matthewsmith2787]

Wise choice

[@lovewhitey2027]

Rare ✍🏻

[@Frankya92]

Same. The only people I got along with at my last job was my boss (ironically) and another fellow that lived in the same area where I grew up. Other than that everyone else was fake af. So many emotional rollercoasters throughout those years

[@bobfg3130]

You mean were?

[@EmperorMingg]

I needed this today Jennifer, thank you!

[@goldensagittarius6030]

You are absolutely right. I realized the hard way. I thought I had work friends and I didn’t hear from any of them when I left the job. I was so hurt.

[@wrestlerchick05]

My rule of thumb: I'm here to work not be friends. Once I clock out, I don't know you!

[@Dredgen-Yor]

Damn ! Lol

[@katelyn888]

@@kingstarscream320 I met 2 of my best friends of over a decade through work. I think trusting your judgment and setting boundaries is important. I don't want to go to work every day of my life thinking that my coworker is out to get me, that isn't health either.

[@GuitarGangsterArmi]

Good idea

[@hannacook859]

You can just be polite but not be friends. She said don't be friends but be friendly, no need to be rude.

[@wrestlerchick05]

@@hannacook859 Wasn't being rude, I was being honest! It's called being a professional, setting boundaries and keeping my peace of mind. That's it! That's all!

[@Jennyscoress]

I recently started a job, and I thought my coworker was so cool and I was really excited to work with her. I soon later found out that she was my bosses right hand man, and informant. I wondered how my boss knew so much, about my training blunders, my and sure enough, it was my co worker relaying everything to her. They share memes, they share whispers, they gossip, say things like “this bitch”, it’s so toxic. Quitting tomorrow.

[@sebastianmunoz3484]

how did you find out?

[@majungasaurusaaaa]

You seem to take things too personnaly for someone show up for a paycheck. Why does all that even matter?

[@ninaaden8338]

@majungasaurusaaaa lmfao sounds like you're the one that says shit like that and you feel called out. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Hokage982]

@@majungasaurusaaaa dude dont gaslight

[@katrina917]

yikes, i have a coworker exactly like this. I've been ignoring her never ending constant DMs and she might've finally gotten the hint.

[@buckybarz3779]

I needed this. I needed this before it was too late. Thank you for this.

[@deenali8379]

Great video!!!! Just had a unexpected day at my work. Learned my lesson…

[@boogitybear2283]

People think they have “Friends”. No, they’re acquaintances. Once you’re dead, I guarantee those “Friends” won’t be visiting your Grave.

[@ErinRaciell]

And what would be the point of that? For them to never move on? Who cares, you are dead, you wouldn’t know anyways.

[@Chelaxim]

It's surprising how quickly people will forget about someone.

[@badeiser]

I’ll visit my friends grave every year after he was put in it. I’ll leave him a shot of Crown Royal just as he would have it. It’s not about moving on it’s about recognizing no one will ever take his place. There will be others but not like him.

[@scofieldvictoria]

In the 18+ years since my grandparents died I’ve NEVER visited their graves. I’d probably break down crying like that time 10+ years after their deaths when I went by their old house and it didn’t even look like the same house. Dad and I still talk about Grandpa all the time. What matters is remembering the dead and continuing to think of them.

[@vedrana.]

I find visiting graves pretty pointless. I don't think it demonstrates the quality of my friendship.

[@marycash183]

Topics to avoid discussing with Co workers at work include: -Dating life -Money (regardless of if you have too much or too little) -Squabbles with your parents - Any drama with your friends or significant other etc. - Any information about your health.

[@r.pres.4121]

Also avoid talking about politics with coworkers.

[@lisah8438]

I wish my co-workers followed those rules.

[@superinquisitor]

@@lisah8438 me too… they talk about their politics all day and the second I give any hint of where I stand, I’m ostracized.

[@Anna-yf9tv]

Thank you so much

[@Payne..]

Best just to get on with the job and get out of there.

[@luigirnotyourbusiness8127]

Be careful. Some people are just pure evil. You have been warned.

[@christophergarr2074]

Vary demonic by nature

[@a.z6765]

Agreed

[@frost6311]

X 1,000

[@hdjfjd8]

yes twisted personalities exist

[@lovegoddess29]

Yup demons are everywhere!

[@TSquare7741]

Amen! I’ve been saying this to others for years! They are co-workers… not friends.