Do you have any tips you would add to deal with toxic coworkers? Or has one of these really helped out?
@stellamaycanson25524 жыл бұрын
Less interaction...great! thank you
@Shortana4 жыл бұрын
Make use of company policies and report abuse to human resources and inform the toxic person. Don't deal with it alone.
@coloneljackmustard3 жыл бұрын
You are so beautiful...
@upncmnh113 жыл бұрын
Whats the toxic coworker where you think you are the problem at work but its really them? Some people are good at manipulating things that way. Your channel is helpful.
@billybibbit91463 жыл бұрын
Dang! This is such good advice. Especially the "assume good intent" part. So smart to let them have another chance.
@geieffect3 жыл бұрын
If they gossip to you...They will GOSSIP about you!
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
Facts 💯💯💯
@jokesonyou2223 жыл бұрын
!!!!
@lowjamz8283 жыл бұрын
I know a guy that kisses the ass of whoever’s around. Then plays both sides of the fence.
@TheCoolOwen3 жыл бұрын
Lies
@theresasutherly8713 жыл бұрын
Agree
@Mike-mc3sh3 жыл бұрын
After hearing some coworkers were gossiping about me I decided to keep my mouth shut and just stick to saying hello to people. This also backfired on me because people started saying I'm unfriendly and negative because I stopped conversing with them. I can't stand people.
@blackgirlsrock2643 жыл бұрын
Don’t bother caring if people think you’re unfriendly! Ignore them! Only give attention and your time to people who deserve it!
@delovely15773 жыл бұрын
I was told im unapproachable now...i responded "Good so theres no need for anyone to speak to me"
@p.f.h.21463 жыл бұрын
I was told that I was not a "team- player".
@ladyfibonaccii3 жыл бұрын
This happened to me!!!!! Sometimes keeping quiet and keeping to yourself will make people think that you think you're better than them, that you're stuck up and aggressive.
@mrsrdrgz3 жыл бұрын
Felt that!
@hanhgfg2 жыл бұрын
It's truly unbelievable how the workplace can be worse than School, grown adults just gossiping, backstabbing, each other on a daily basis.
@juansalazar6443 Жыл бұрын
I’m dealing with two coworkers that are acting like they’re in middle school setting an alarm off which is to notify me that a mold is in the pass through and when I go there’s nothing. Saying stupid jokes and lies to make me look foolish and they’re in their mid 30s.
@rutar.7413 Жыл бұрын
Yeah.. because in school children are like little grown up people
@serga7486 Жыл бұрын
for what its worth its a high likelihood that they were the exact same back in school. just never learned to be decent people. aaaand we have to figure out how to deal with em. every damn day
@AlyssaTheePatriot Жыл бұрын
Amen! I thought a job was an adult place not Elementary school lol😊
@xenomorph2258 Жыл бұрын
It can be 1000x worse, many people never grow up, they are just a**hole in entire life.
@philmarsh77233 жыл бұрын
Toxic coworkers are a problem only if the management grants them power over you.
@dennismclaurin14873 жыл бұрын
I'm afraid that's my case.
@jadeyoung45443 жыл бұрын
Luckily my manager hates my toxic coworker and wants her gone too
@ldreese333 жыл бұрын
Been there before
@fallenchao3 жыл бұрын
@@dennismclaurin1487 me too
@ZetaCancri3 жыл бұрын
which they always do!
@taylorpresley46043 жыл бұрын
After years of dealing with workplace bullying at so many places I can't count (when the bs starts, I always quit) I finally have a job where I am self-employed. Praise God. Most people are miserable.
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad that you found the path that works for you!
@danalarose8463 жыл бұрын
I'm self employed but have toxic coworkers
@stasiabri41963 жыл бұрын
What do you do working for self, if you don’t mind me asking?
@st-od8mt2 жыл бұрын
What do you do?
@luisathexplorer2 жыл бұрын
Yea. Ugh
@ldreese333 жыл бұрын
I heard this phrase once before “Sometimes the best response is no response, and it is a powerful one”.
@tracywright64373 жыл бұрын
Facts
@ladyfibonaccii3 жыл бұрын
Until they say that's you being aggressive somehow.....or stuck up
@Ender-Corbin3 жыл бұрын
Sometimes. Others will take it as a sign to elevate the pressure.
@50shadesofgreyrock683 жыл бұрын
Right on!!
@strauqq13 жыл бұрын
🤔 You might be right
@nickiminajj31193 жыл бұрын
I work in retail and I Honesty find it way more enjoyable talking to the customers than I do co workers
@shesadiamond51673 жыл бұрын
same literally
@3939889ISME2 жыл бұрын
Couldn’t agree more.
@ccalexander19242 жыл бұрын
I did too !
@Kamone1112 жыл бұрын
Sad isn’t it?
@marthareyes64652 жыл бұрын
Me too 😂 I work for Publix .had to move department because I had an abusive and toxic coworker .she made my life miserable for a year .got tired of defending myself from her .i guess she has a miserable life 😂
@Rose612343 жыл бұрын
I just started somewhere new and was a big naive. Everyone was so nice and lovely to me and I believed that they were actually like that. 3 months in, I see and overhear everything people say about each other. Constant bitching and backstabbing. Now I’m really regretting opening up at the beginning!
@shutit40243 жыл бұрын
Omg same !!!! I been here a little over a year and see how they really are I only shared a little bit in the beginning only with one coworker, but after some months I decided to stop and only talk job related things
@sophisticatedmm36323 жыл бұрын
@@shutit4024 Same here
@VS-yk3gu3 жыл бұрын
Yea happened with me - there seems to be are very few who are real and true
@shutit40243 жыл бұрын
@@VS-yk3gu you are so right! I only have 2 coworkers that stayed true and are actually nice people and they are fed up with the place too. I did have 3 other coworkers who were nice and never started drama but of course they ended up leaving because of this place.
@VS-yk3gu3 жыл бұрын
@@shutit4024 yea it’s not worth arguing with fools.. ignoring them is best strategy
@Darci3333 Жыл бұрын
Silence may sometimes be misconstrued but it will never be misquoted...
@unknown-lf6zx7 ай бұрын
1) Stop taking the bait. Breathe and stay away. Don’t react if you can but document. 2) Set Boundaries. Don’t feed the trolls. 👿 Don’t over share to anyone. Making sure you are assertive with saying no. 3) Know when to push back and when to ignore them. Stay away from them. Recognize where to let go and when to push back 4) Don’t acknowledge when they put you down and document 5) minimize your interactions. Do all the right things. 6) asked closed questions coworker and ask them to reach out via email so you have documentation 7) be positive 😊
@PantaRhei-wz5zn3 ай бұрын
I did these things, but it was draining as hell. The amount of energy it cost was huge & intereferes with the actual work. all the endless documentation, extra questions etc. are extra, and genereate systematic overtime. out of your own pocket. It sucks. Basically, i could cope at work by employing these control mechanisms, but over time i developed a burn out. Too emotionally draining + too much overtime Too much of it, simply doesnt work. There is no actual solution ...
@mikethemechanic73954 жыл бұрын
Keep your home life private. I worked at one place where I was 25 years old and was getting constant promotions and was going on big vacations and purchasing new cars. Everyone I worked with were over 50 and bitterly divorced or broke etc. I used to get. “Must be nice” or Hawaii again? It got so bad it caused my coworkers to gang up on me and get me fired after 7 years. My current job I keep quiet about what I spent my money on and what I do.
@mzpisces3024 жыл бұрын
Great advice!! People are often miserable in their own lives and get stuck in allowing a job to define them instead of creating a better life and opportunities for themselves within or outside of their jobs.
@quietrebelstrength13993 жыл бұрын
@@mzpisces302 Facts!!
@DontTakeItLiteral3 жыл бұрын
Hating broke miserable MFs . Excuse me please .... I just got upset 😭
@GentlRebel3 жыл бұрын
I totally agree! I keep my financial status very very private from my coworkers. Stealth wealth is my motto. To that end, I have a very nice luxury car but I keep my 16 year old Mini Cooper to drive to work. No one knows about my “weekend” car. Some of my coworkers kid me that I should trade in my “beater” for a new car because I deserve better. I just smile and say thanks but I’m really attached to my Mini (which is actually true). I know beyond a doubt that if I showed up in my other car, it would be a very different story.
@justintautuaa31733 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the life tip
@OurGodIsLove3 жыл бұрын
Sometimes just one toxic coworker can make your day terrible!
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
💯💯💯
@lizi.250311 ай бұрын
They told me that 6 people quit because of this person and I can’t stand working with them yet they still work there because short staff
@bigcheese938310 ай бұрын
so true they have a disease and its spreads man
@Tikolico6 ай бұрын
We had a guy who was so toxic he single handedly got 4 people to quit and 2 people to request a transfer and 2 other guys were considering quitting until Mr. Toxic got fired for threatening to kill the boss... dude literally threatened to harm a coworker infront of the boss and nothing was done, but as soon as he threatened the boss, he got fired on the spot, and we have a Zero tolerance policy... so that ought to tell you the double standard this company operates on.
@CarrieV93 жыл бұрын
Working remotely helps minimize interactions with toxic coworkers and allows us to focus on just getting the work done. It’s the best thing that ever happened to the office! I never want to go back to dealing with all that nonsense.
@sophisticatedmm36323 жыл бұрын
Exactly absolutely heaven
@hdjfjd83 жыл бұрын
but long term is it possible to sustain it ? I mean say if you're interested one day in going the manager route ,then is it possible for those kind of senior roles to continue remotely ?
@GrandmaCathy3 жыл бұрын
100%!!!!!
@Anony5843 жыл бұрын
@@hdjfjd8 it’s a sacrifice most people are willing to take. The politics of getting to and staying in management is not worth it for many people.
@Lisa-my5sy3 жыл бұрын
@@hdjfjd8 yes
@robbiepeterh4 жыл бұрын
Question: why is our society so full of this toxic nonsense?
@JenniferBrick4 жыл бұрын
It all comes down to something very simple: inequitable patriarchal norms. Our society values a very specific percentage of the population who adheres to dominant alpha expectations. Everyone else is harmed to varying degrees
@quietrebelstrength13993 жыл бұрын
I know right, great question Robbie!
@quietrebelstrength13993 жыл бұрын
@@JenniferBrick Facts, I agree with that!
@robbiepeterh3 жыл бұрын
@@JenniferBrick I think you’re correct
@4bidden13 жыл бұрын
@@JenniferBrick I got a better simpler explanation...it’s called CAPITALISM...before every body loses their shit and calls me a communist keep in mind a great man once said : “capitalism is people exploiting other people while communism is the opposite “ 😂
@idamaya33983 жыл бұрын
I love my job.. I just hate the treatment im getting :(
@loulou23023 жыл бұрын
Same😔
@heatherfeather12933 жыл бұрын
Me too
@idamaya33983 жыл бұрын
@@loulou2302 aww 😔 I'm giving u virtual hug
@idamaya33983 жыл бұрын
@@heatherfeather1293 sorry to hear that 😞.. *hugs*
@edgyjotaro44263 жыл бұрын
omg same
@amosiren2 жыл бұрын
Ok- this piece of advice is going to solve all your workplace problems: NEVER put yourself into a position where you depend on your specific job. Whatever lifestyle adjustments you need to make- make them NOW. My mental health improved only when I didn't need to work at my job, I knew I could work ANYWHERE, and I mean even a minimum wage job and not have it drastically impact my life. Choosing to work instead of needing to work is the only thing that's going to save you from misery.
@SeaFlower38 Жыл бұрын
How
@brittneyleighba Жыл бұрын
I completely agree! Feeling stuck in a toxic workplace because of financial reasons, I have definitely learned my lesson.
@NTJedi6 ай бұрын
Still working because I want a second home (a cabin) in the mountains. I would have to give up this dream if I was to quit working.
@tq55895 ай бұрын
especially in the economy that we are in now, people should always try to have a plan B
@metrometheus6413 жыл бұрын
Co-workers who actually gets satisfaction and pleasure from doing this to people who did nothing wrong and minding their own business needs some serious help, or sometimes possibly an attitude adjustment.
@shesadiamond51673 жыл бұрын
yea my coworkers gossip about me behind my back for not knowing what to do, nd make fun of me. i literally just started but i quit today, its too toxic
@50shadesofgreyrock683 жыл бұрын
👍👍👍👍👍👍
@noyb4441 Жыл бұрын
They need MENTAL help.
@metrometheus641 Жыл бұрын
@@noyb4441 also because they’re mad that their mommy and daddy left them when they were 9.
@miameow48333 жыл бұрын
Hate nosy coworkers, they always ask your marital state, nationality, age, how many kids, why not if u say you don't have any. It's like they want to know so that can judge you more than they already were. U Don't want to answer coz whatever you say, will be used against you But if you don't answer, u come off as rude, if you answer, they will ask more
@sillau93 жыл бұрын
Facts..I can't stand noisy people..especially cuz they are typically the ones who gossip and talk sh*t,lol
@LunaPaloma773 жыл бұрын
You're absolutely right. I see this kind of behavior at my workplace all the time.
@sophie_4240 Жыл бұрын
I AM DEALING WITH THIS TYPE OF PERSON NOW, I AM SO UPSET AND IT MAKES ME SICK AND I CANT GO TO work. sorry for the capslock, i didnt realized and too lazy to edti lol, she is from Serbia, and constantly ask about everybody's personal life including me. she was so mad that I purchase new Benz before new year, I can tell she is full of jealousy and envious and SHE always talk bad about the manager being having money and all the co workers who had side hustle, she is miserable!
@supersqueak Жыл бұрын
Swear to god these people are so evil and toxic as fuck. They are constantly judging and sizing people up. They want to judge you but are clearly so unhappy in their own lives they have to be in everybody else's business.
@miguelcruz2682 Жыл бұрын
I knew this one single mother with two kids at work and one day she asked me if I had any kids ( I knew why she was asking to see if I possibly be a man to support her and her kids knowing I had a LDR.. so I simply told her NO I JUST GOT LUCKY & I laughed!!!.. talk about being rude... That's none of her business)... She didn't like that well she should of been more careful and respectful before asking such a personal question.
@sds63033 жыл бұрын
I'm a therapist working in an inpatient psychiatric hospital. I'm learning that just bc you're a therapist, doesn't mean you're not a toxic person yourself. My coworkers gossip so much I feel like I'm in high school, like I wonder how they got their licenses, I feel like I'm in high school.
@juna8089 Жыл бұрын
That's me right now. Just cause someone is working in the mental health field doesn't mean they are a nice person. I wanna leave but I can't since it's an internship.
@serga7486 Жыл бұрын
dude i worked in a highschool and some of my teacher coworkers gossiped like i'd expect the students to
@SeaFlower38 Жыл бұрын
:(
@ha181293 Жыл бұрын
Yeah well, I’m a nurse and trust me it doesn’t matter what age they are or how caring they act in front of the patients, they’ll be hiding in the office or the printer room at any chance they get, and be backstabbing the shit out of you, your other coworkers, the patients and their families. They’re toxic and vile and acting like 14 year olds even though they’re supposed to be caring grown up adults. I’ve tried to just get on with my own stuff and ignore their bullshit, but if you’re not part of it, you instantly become the target of it. It’s honestly riddiculous. Now they think I’m arrogant and not a ‘team player’, just because I don’t want no part in their infantile shit show. The boss is part of it too, in a way, and she is gaslighting so much it’s insane, yeah she can’t see that there are any problems. Guess that’s news to her. Jesus Christ.
@laurabruce9948 Жыл бұрын
Sometimes the only way to deal with a toxic coworker is to leave, especially if they're entrenched with the higher ups. Pay attention to who's friends with who because if they're willing to hang out with such an awful person what does that say about them, especially if they find the toxic person funny or they like how they tell it like it is.
@shebakali6 Жыл бұрын
That is exactly what I am dealing with now. I just quit bc the toxic coworker was gaslighting me and the boss who is friends with her, took her side. I find many of the toxic people to be narcissists who are enabled by higher ups and colleagues
@sophisticatedmm36324 жыл бұрын
YES toxic colleagues gossip/ talk too much, passive/ aggressive, petty, ect. Don't over share & say much about your personal life. These colleagues went out for cocktails & I didn't go or give a reason why I didn't go. Luckily I get to work remotely from home since the pandemic. Praise God. When their birthdays came around I didn't acknowledge them. I try to limit my interactions with certain colleagues & deal with them for business/ work related purposes. Thanks for these wonderful tips. #5 is my favorite
@sophisticatedmm36323 жыл бұрын
@Silver & Cold I don't blame you I don't want to be around disingenuous people or buying gifts for them for secret Santa during the holiday season.
@mate3233 жыл бұрын
I saw this comment too late 💀
@DC-iv5vq2 жыл бұрын
This happened to me today. All my coworkers went out for lunch and I didn't go. It was on such a short notice that all were going out.
@sophisticatedmm36322 жыл бұрын
@@DC-iv5vq Good for you do you really want to be around disingenuous people outside of work ( lunch, social settings, ect).
@DC-iv5vq2 жыл бұрын
@@sophisticatedmm3632 hell no. My now senior is very toxic. She acts like she cares but then she'd be the first one to drag me down and talk behind my back if something goes wrong. I know that's what happens behind the curtains but they're good at hiding. She's been so cold to me. She is a very cold person. I hate working with her
@NadNadja3 жыл бұрын
this is necessary when people have the need to be "social" in their work enviroment. I never ever had problems at my workplace because I couldnt care less about anyone in there. for me everybody there is just a 0, my world is outside my job. that doesnt mean you have to be rude, my go to phrase is actually look at the person and go 'oh' and move on.
@bxcutie4life20072 жыл бұрын
Thank you.
@ninaxfresagabs Жыл бұрын
Lol same I always say “I go to work to work not to make friends”
@rvh773 жыл бұрын
These people are called malignant narcissists. A whole nother class of miserable people.
@emskeeeee3 жыл бұрын
They’re everywhere
@dennismclaurin14873 жыл бұрын
@@emskeeeee Dan.9;27 refers to this as the overflowing of abominations(idols).The 2ND flood could happen, soon.
@francescalegrand62573 жыл бұрын
yes. That is what they are !!
@jenamirgholi60043 жыл бұрын
omg, lol. malignant, that means it is not curable. perhaps that is why remote working developed
@jafhio22842 жыл бұрын
True
@nikoleaponte91004 жыл бұрын
I honestly have no time for passive aggressive behavior. So these tips are super helpful. My approach is to stay objectively focused on results and not bad behavior.
@JenniferBrick4 жыл бұрын
That's the exact right thing to do, Nikole!
@sadeanthony27603 жыл бұрын
I'm doing self love and minimising interactions and continuing to be my self. Only speak to relatively kind people.
@MixSonaProductions3 жыл бұрын
problems are: 1. They have set the prejudice against you, one sided. no reason. 2. if they don't like you, they just don't. You can buy em drinks, but they will still talk about you 3. These toxic people, see you as toxic, if you react or call em out NEVER COMPROMISE. but pick your battles, carefully. don't have to win all battles For me its too late. I called em out. sometimes they avoid gentlemen conversation and settled it one sided
@Bootstrap3T22 жыл бұрын
Your point no 2, im always trying to make the best for them or cheering with them. But instead they still talk behind me about me in a bad way to make me the worst person infront other coworkers. Sometimes angry level will come but i have to hold my anger just to make sure there's is no fighting at a working place's. Last word for them, I DONT GIVE A FUCKKK!!!!
@SeaFlower38 Жыл бұрын
What do u mean by never compromise
@danielcastillo45373 жыл бұрын
People have to realize that there are fires burning way before you get to a workplace. Every work situation has some level of drama. Remember you are surrounded by haunted people. Lots of egos and bullies. You always got that one person who loves to create chaos because in chaos people can be controlled. The said ringleader sets up colleagues like wind up dolls and watches them fight amongst each other. They do all the dirty work while they ascend to a higher position. The best thing to do is to be diplomatic at the get go. If been in hostile work environments. It makes you dread going to work.
@chrisslayer90142 жыл бұрын
Yes, I try to keep in mind I am still work to achieve a goal and go home.
@beachlife4993 Жыл бұрын
The ringleader at my job started her own rumor about herself and played victim, it’s crazy!
@Benzyl_Penoxide3 жыл бұрын
I started my first job (restaurant job) a few weeks ago. I was so naive to think everybody was nice and courteous. There is a lot of backstabbing, toxic/arrogant coworkers, people talking behind my back. I’m glad I can see a bit of what “the real world” is like at just 15 years old.
@BJ-fj6jw2 жыл бұрын
Harvey, please do not lose your wonderful upbringing from home. It is your greatest strength. Be in the world, but not of it. Be the silent loving example. Stay inside "the real world" within yourself. You inspire me.
@sophisticatedmm36322 жыл бұрын
This is just the beginning at least your prepared for a career in the future, corporate America can be brutal
@TJDW Жыл бұрын
I was 15 when a started my first job too, it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good either
@user-vy6li8ys2n Жыл бұрын
ive started a waitress job as well and the people who were the nicest in the beginning turned out to be absolutely awful to me every time they get a chance, acting like all i do is wrong when it’s simply not, it’s really discouraging but you shouldn’t lower yourself to their level, just do your thing and listen to your superiors instead of people who you’re not actually working for
@moonladylife11 ай бұрын
I agree my waitress and bartending jobs were the most toxic places I’ve worked. A lot of stress and immature behaviors.
@tc84403 жыл бұрын
I work in an environment like this. The boss encourages it. A part of their divide and conquer concept, I think.
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
That's really unfortunate it's cultivated.
@mrs.h448410 ай бұрын
When I worked, I always gravitated to an older person. They were always more grounded, helpful, and non judgmental.
@cynthiakk5966 Жыл бұрын
I had a group of girls bullies me very badly at work. Now, I cut relationship with three of them and never talk with them anymore. Another two, I just say hi and bye. I found that it got much more peace. I did need learn assertive skills.
@prepforlife44253 жыл бұрын
They’re clever … instead of being direct with being nosey- they say things like “mentioning someone for another reason and see if you have something to say about that person “ idk how explain it but they try to get you to “talk’ so they can then go running off to tell the person. Taken me a long time to figure people out. So I’ve learned to just completely divert the conversation and talk about work related content. Essentially acting completely oblivious to any BS going on. A lot of people are exhausting!
@MoistCrumpet2 жыл бұрын
I worked at a retail store once for a bit and my god... there was so much cattiness! I've always had to deal with having a learning disability and these two grown women would laugh at me behind my back. I once heard them laughing and saying "wow, she's so slow" while pointing at me. It didn't really bother me that much funnily enough, I just couldn't help but think about how incredibly immature they were being. Some people just don't grow up after graduating high school. I found the best strategy of dealing with it was just to ignore those people, and be polite to them when they talk to you but don't try to be overly friendly with them either. I'm glad I didn't work there for very long.
@jacklampin24112 жыл бұрын
I work in retail Currently and there’s a 58 year old coworker who is nice to everyone but me and when she is nice to me it comes across to me as fake, and all of them gossip about me they tell others I’m not good at my job and get new hires to be on there side I’m losing hope i really want to quit as I’ve experienced burnout but i feel trapped I honestly don’t like the place and am only working there because I feel forced
@jacklampin24112 жыл бұрын
And the 58 year old tried to defend me the other day when there was a nasty customer but my gut was telling me that she just did it to make herself look good and for me to look like I’m an ass and to get that coworker who stranded up to her for me to hate me I just don’t want to work there anymore I extremely hate the place
@jacklampin24112 жыл бұрын
I could tell because this is not something the rude coworker would ever do looking back she’s never stuck up for me all she’s done was trying to get me fired for the smallest and stupidest things and all the coworkers believe her and all hate me it’s starting to effect my mental health. I just seriously don’t want to work there anymore I act like I like it but in reality i don’t
@goodmorningsundaymorning45332 жыл бұрын
You def don't sound slow to me. You're full of intelligence and wisdom way above and beyond those catty toxic coworkers.
@melliecrann-gaoth4789 Жыл бұрын
@@jacklampin2411compassion to you- a@@hole behaviour.
@xboxxguy_93603 жыл бұрын
Toxic co workers act friendly around you then gossip & talk crap about you behind your back. Glad I quit my previous job
@janicegiegerich62273 жыл бұрын
I've had toxic co-workers go into the boss after I had eye surgery and tell him I was going blind and that they should get rid of me. Then after we purchased a vacation home in another state, someone went in and told him I was moving away so they need to start thinking of replacing me! I assured the boss both times that these comments weren't true, so these co-workers only made themselves look stupid. Just sucks having to deal with the negativity and attempted back stabbing all the time.
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
Manage the info you share with those people. Glad your boss sees through it 💜
@MixSonaProductions2 жыл бұрын
They are trying every possible way to bring you down Because you are capable and they see you as a THREAT
@dentn4622 жыл бұрын
These kind of people will stay where they should, they will rot in their own hatred so let them be, follow your own path 💙
@gracemat9474 Жыл бұрын
Why do I always end up in toxic workplaces? Lord help me find my own perfect place 😩
@Memg0076 ай бұрын
Amen ❤
@jadeyoung45443 жыл бұрын
Recently I've just realised I've gotta dial down some of my work relationships. Keep things on a colleague level. Sometimes I overshare without realising and take part in gossip. Which I'm in trouble for with a coworker now as I overcrossed a line with her. After this incident I just feel like... It's less trouble the quieter you are. Because of my mistake I am here.
@yalitzaotero27652 жыл бұрын
It’s ok I totally get you been there! But we keep learning as we go 🫶🏼
@relocatetoEUROPE Жыл бұрын
Grey rock be boring
@juliamacfarlane26303 жыл бұрын
I resigned the week before finding you!!!! 🤦🏻♀️ taking all of this to my new workplace though. You’re great!
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
Well I'm glad you found me!!
@mollyfox71743 жыл бұрын
I am in the same exact boat!!! We’ve got this girl!
@nemo82mi3 жыл бұрын
I get riled in very easily. I am very expressive and passionate person and behave exactly the same way and when someone gossip I get affected and involved very easily. And got myself in trouble at work without doing anything. But I have learned to distance myself from toxic co-workers as I grew older but time and again I make the mistake again by getting affected by them
@sophisticatedmm36323 жыл бұрын
You have to put things in perspective, these are not your friends or people that you should trust/ confide in
@jeansenn28313 жыл бұрын
I am in a very similar situation. It has gotten to the point where I have so completely shut down I only reply to direct questions from management. I avoid any interaction with coworkers because they snap at me, yell at me, and totally disrespect me. I don't even occupy the same space when I can help it. If it isn't too hot or cold I spend my lunch hours in my car it is that horrible.
@imtired29833 жыл бұрын
It’s sad how they drag you in, and then you realize it’s a pattern. A toxic pattern.
@nemo82mi3 жыл бұрын
@@jeansenn2831 snapping at you? That is not acceptable at work place. Can you not make a complaint how that co-worker make you feel? It would have been time for me to look for another job if that is the way your colleague behave and the company is not doing anything about it
@jasmer67543 жыл бұрын
Me too. I'm very opinionated, expressive, and blunt. I'm trying really hard to reign it in because I have opened up a bit and shared some of my opinions about some problems going on at work (that are bothering ALL of us) to a couple people I have since realized may be the wrong people to open up about anything at all to. I've gotten a lot better about not getting sucked into drama and staying neutral, but I do still sometimes get drawn in and I think it's about to cause me some unpleasantness.
@shutit40243 жыл бұрын
When I put my 2 weeks notice in they kept asking me questions and personal questions and I’m like can y’all wish me the best and just keep it moving?
@miameow48333 жыл бұрын
Betcha it would kill them to NOT let them know where u are going coz they are dying to compare themselves to you. So leaving with " I'm going to find myself," they won't know if u will return to school/ training, traveling the world or joining a monastery. 😂
@shutit40243 жыл бұрын
@@miameow4833 I told them after I settle in I’ll come back and tell them 😂😂 little do they know I’m 10 hours away from them and about to change my number so they can f*** off 😂😂😂
@shutit40243 жыл бұрын
@dev null haha do that I really didn’t want to quit my job but after a few months of being there I started to really see people’s true colors they’re lucky I stayed for a year because people seem to quit left and right
@dcabral004 жыл бұрын
Based on all these tips, sounds like the best advice is to treat all coworkers as if they all are toxic.
@pinnaryokubo35633 жыл бұрын
The best thing is to report them to the boss
@DontTakeItLiteral3 жыл бұрын
Basically bc even when you do let your guard down thinking you can trust one , they prove you wrong and it never ends well . After being on this job for two years , I’m just now deciding to stay to myself , keep my business to myself , stay out the way , and avoid ALL co workers , even the one person I thought I could trust . As long as nobody say nothing out the way to me directly , I’m good && they are too 😌
@dcabral003 жыл бұрын
@@DontTakeItLiteral Good deal. Coworkers are not your friends. If you are working remotely, my advice is to be noticeably more efficient and productive, so that the arrangement continues after the pandemic. Some of my work requires me to be in the office, and I love it because it is empty and quiet when I am there.
@matthewsmith27873 жыл бұрын
I once told a co worker something in confidence, the next day the manager was aware of what I said! I was very annoyed
@user-of9bx1uk3u3 жыл бұрын
@@matthewsmith2787 so, much for keeping a secret. Same thing happened to me and well, let’s say that it will never ever happen again.
@tommyp.87762 жыл бұрын
I recently switched from hospitality to an office job and it was terrible. In hospitality, there was usually so much work to do you simply didn't have time for gossip and "office politics" shit. Team work was usually great. Also there were lots of very young people, who in my experience are more "aware" and don't try to create drama as much. In my personal statistics, it's been older women with sons (I'm a girl) who were the worst bullies towards me for some unknown fucking reason lol
@achieving.excellence3 жыл бұрын
What you said at the very start is ssooo true - you will not only be dealing with a toxic co-worker... you are going to be dealing with a toxic (af) work environment. The unfortunate thing is that some of these 'toxic' co-workers can be 'popular' and therefore the issue becomes more than just the rift between you and this person.
@davidclark36033 жыл бұрын
How strange. You can be surrounded by people, but yet, feel so alone?
@patsyghannie2212 жыл бұрын
Don't you understand we are not alone. Toxic workers are in every workplace. You just can't scope to there level! We are better then them. We have a life and are happy with who we are. They aren't stay positive, stay strong. It's not easy but you can do it!
@patsyghannie2212 жыл бұрын
Keep on loving yourself for who you are
@sasz21073 жыл бұрын
The only thing I'll say about being Blissfully Unaware - I tried this technique - since my toxic coworker was my boss. I wouldn't take the bait when he said or did rude things, etc. I always acted pleasant towards him and acted like nothing was wrong. So he thought I was clueless and escalated the situation - to the point where he wouldn't tell me things, then lie and say that he told me. This way, I would "mess up" in his eyes and it was "proof" that I had no idea what was going on so that meant I didn't know how to do my job. He connected me with problems that happened in the group even when I wasn't physically present for what happened, so how could I have been at fault for that? So - sometimes, if the person is really crazy, this doesn't work, especially if they are your boss have power over you.
@danalarose8463 жыл бұрын
Correct, I've had many just Amp it up
@laurenp10132 жыл бұрын
Yes…this happened with my first awful boss. It wasn’t until the pandemic started and she worked remote that others saw her true intentions and that I was actually an amazing employee. Now I’m dealing with a toxic coworker and I’m trying to be more vocal/stand up for myself but this has resulted in its own challenges. Why are there so many toxic people in workplaces?
@savagesalvage94492 жыл бұрын
@@laurenp1013 There's just a lot of toxic people in general. A lot of broken homes. A lot of people who don't even respect themselves, so why should they respect you?
@kerrin66332 жыл бұрын
True. How horrible
@saraht5161 Жыл бұрын
EXACTLY, all these KZbin videos are not helping, and most comments as well, hec even friends and family are saying the same thing, well just stay cordial. The problem is I’ve been cordial from the very start because I know anything more than that from past experiences in past jobs, is seen as an open door to manipulate and take advantage of you. But man. Since I’m new I have questions on how to do my job. I don’t talk to them because I want to. No matter what I do, the problem escalates. I just have to contact human recourses after I attempt AGAIN to communicate the problems to my supervisor.
@growing3677 ай бұрын
1:08 Dont take the bait 2:00 don't react 2:19 Set boundaries 2:51 Don't overshare 3:09 Be Confident & Assertive saying No 3:43 Know when to Fight & Ignore 5:40 Ignore their Disses 6:40 Minimize interactions, Keep emails 7:55 *Use closed questions 9:09 Be positive
@davidsaarelajr.59863 жыл бұрын
If you focus on the work, you wont see any of the toxic things going on around you. FOCUS on the work, perfecting your craft!
@brittc18 Жыл бұрын
False
@davidsaarelajr.5986 Жыл бұрын
@@brittc18 opinion statements are not true and false. You agree or disagree! 🤣
@Memg0076 ай бұрын
Not true. Toxic people always make sure you’re aware of their action one way or the other
@Katkipp6663 жыл бұрын
This video helped me out so much. My manager is the one who is toxic, and she has her little clique of girls whom feed into her. My manager creates so much toxicity that I do, unfortunately, absorb it into my own energy and feel like crap after I come home. For a while, I thought I was the crazy one or the "black sheep" of the "family" (oh, yes, she calls us a family). Almost always, when I don't feed in or act like I'm apart of the other girls, I get casted put immediately.
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
Companies who talk about being a family are red flags to me.
@BriW4443 жыл бұрын
@@JenniferBrick exactly.
@jayalexander90333 жыл бұрын
I'm dealing with the same exact thing it's my manager and the owner I work at a subway and they both treat me like crap because I I'm not a fast learner and sometimes have trouble processing what is being explained to me and they would lose their patience and have an attitude about it, and it would leave me extremely upset and then I would start messing up I'm more things at my job because my anxiety would get the best of me and then I would end up taking it out on the wrong people which is the customer's which I don't mean to my voice would get really low and I would start sounding more rude when I am really just panicking and then everything else would go off of wall and then I would go home crying after work. The owner is currently headed on her honeymoon and when she comes back they are probably going to let me go. I am so scared to death because I don't have any other job lined up and I'm living on my own paying for everything😢 the problem is this isn't the first time I've had jobs like that and would leave crying or get let go so I'm wondering if it's them or me? It's crazy
@valerieherron89742 жыл бұрын
@@BriW444 Yws, people seem to not have any patience when you don’t learn quickly. What makes it so bad, most of them don’t know how to train others. They also label you. This has happened with me. I was going through my mother’s death and couldn’t process or remember anything. They eventually let me go and I’m glad they did!
@tommyp.87762 жыл бұрын
@@jayalexander9033 hey! That sucks, but it happened to me before. There were places were people just took the TIME to train me and eventually I would really thrive and get lots of praise. At other places I was made to feel dumb and slow. It always depends on the environment. How are you doing now?
@shesadiamond51673 жыл бұрын
Having anxiety and toxic coworkers is the worst 😂 i quit my new job todayyy for the sake of my mental health.. they would literally talk behind my back and make fun of me for not knowing what to do. i felt so out of place, and disrespected.
@Darl-ur3uq Жыл бұрын
Same, what do you do now !
@4XRICHIE3 жыл бұрын
Being nosey and gossiping about some people lives is one thing, but when that gossip turns toxic where they completely invent stories and lies about you and start spreading that around the workplace, that is another thing. You shouldn't be expected to change your own behaviour to accommodate the rumour mongerers and liars who are spreading shit about you for whatever reason. In America I don't know what the laws are about this but they can't be much different than the U.K. If anyone spreads lies about you which is causing you distress then that is defamation and you can sue and drag them through court. Don't alter anything about your good self to please these abusers just drag their ass into a courtroom, whoever they are, manager or not stand up for what is right.
@pamelamays41863 жыл бұрын
The most toxic work environment I've ever been in is the childcare center/preschool environment. After three years of returning to the field of childcare after being away for nine years, I left the field for good.
@beverlymorgan69303 жыл бұрын
That's been my experience as well with that field.
@asunset85453 жыл бұрын
Yeah I'm dealing with that now too.
@lorsange11072 жыл бұрын
I know. I'm dealing with it right now as well. Preschool teachers and adm are the most toxic.
@siobhanod2 жыл бұрын
Same story with me
@teachervanessa7716 Жыл бұрын
Same, I've been dealing with it too.
@JimmyJaxJellyStax3 жыл бұрын
Notice how toxic coworkers always look so angry with everything when they aren't in the spotlight, then extremely charming when it comes time to shine... then angry again in the dark. That anger...
@annasmerchek28356 ай бұрын
Yessssss 💯
@its.me.80883 жыл бұрын
My co-workers are some of the most manipulative people I have seen in my life!!! I hate playing mind games and being calculative. But it's like they force me to be a rude/ bad person every single day! I'm generally a friendly person. I hate making people feel uncomfortable or even left out. I try to always always always make sure that I don't hurt others in anyway, intentionally or unintentionally. When I joined at this new place, I had the weirdest experiences. Everyone spoke one particular language and even if I was a part of the conversation they would completely ignore me and talk in a different language that I didn't understand. Every single time. It's extremely disrespectful and awkward. They would have casual and formal conversations regarding work and exclude me from those chats by talking in a their mother tongue. I was so shocked to see how nobody showed anyyy concern. I feel like I lose a lot of information because I don't understand most of the things they discuss. And often times they forget to update me. My colleague, is a very manipulative woman! She purposely corrects me in public, aloudd or just makes it sound or look like I made a mistake and as though Im at fault. At first I didn't know how to react because I had never dealt with such a situation. After a point, i started snapping back at her. 'A taste of her own medicine. I'd all out on her for all her mistakes which I would have otherwise ignored or discussed with her calmly. The other day, she sent an email to the project manager and a few other ppl. Inspite of us working our asses off on the project she emailed the heads without including us in the email. Today I called out on her. I mailed her asking her to not do that. I did so by emailing her and keeping the same heads and colleagues in the CC of the mail. She responded to it like I did something so absurd. But I'm a 100% certain that she's being extremely manipulative. Now she's playing the victim card because I called her out on what she did. On one hand I don't want to create this ruckus. But everytime I try to be friendly she takes advantage of it and changes like a chameleon. Starts bossing me around thinking since I'm friendly, I'll take that shit. I mean, what's wrong with people!!!
@Darl-ur3uq Жыл бұрын
How things are going with you at the momemt because I am getting through the same thing now
@jesser34423 жыл бұрын
On my first day of work/training, I introduced myself to my trainer/lead and instead of introducing herself she said, “just to let u know, I critique a lot. I’m intimidating and I know I am. I’m just letting you know.” And I was like (red flag) but said oh ok nice to meet u too. Since training she literally critiques me on every little thing that I do and made me feel like I’m a fool at my job as a nurse. Pretty much I’m wrong in everything. I approached her and told her to calm it down but little has changed. I have escalated it to my manager now because more issues and should i say many red flags have popped up. It’s sad it’s barely the first week and it’s going like this. I don’t want to leave because it’s been my dream to work for this hospital. It’s very upsetting. My goal is to get a different trainer or else i know she will not pass my probation. Please advise.
@kaywinter58213 жыл бұрын
Hi Jesse i hope you and your family are well. Since you are in a training/ work environment keep a detailed log book of all your interactions with this individual. You are not a fool and always trust your Gut! I was in a similar situation and I let several things slide for months and eventually had to leave. This individual that is training you has possibly been there for years and I guarentee you are not the first person nor will be the last person to experience this. are you able to change shifts to have a new training lead?
@johndoe-wv3nu3 жыл бұрын
Administration knows this woman and approve of her training methods. This hospital will be toxic in all areas. Time to bail.
@MelH873 жыл бұрын
I know so many nurses like this. It’s nothing personal but extremely frustrating. I would just go along with it and put on the happy face, it won’t last forever.
@nataliaromanova95563 жыл бұрын
Just quit a job over something similar. After being told I was doing it wrong (Where it had been exactly how it was supposed to be done the last place I worked) but never getting any real feedback or specifics, I pointed out I am unable to correct something. I can't fix a problem if I don't know exactly what it is. I spent nearly 4 months trying to make the situation better and finally realized it wasn't going to happen. So I quit. it wasn't worth the stress or the headache involved.
@sunshinex3153 жыл бұрын
I’m a Nurse too (ironically mental health - you’d think coworkers would be nice) and am experiencing a coworker who is nit picking, undermining etc almost everything I suggest. If I ignore her and do what I am going to do anyway, she will physically get in my way (eg taking away the person or object I’m going to interact with). Then she denies everything, blaming me for feeling undermined. Typical gaslighting behaviours. Either she is a sneaky bully or has absolutely zilch emotional intelligence. I’m so sorry you experience similar, you’re not alone. It’s really hard to cope with.
@RosaliaR Жыл бұрын
I do nothing but do my job and yet they still wanna make you seem like the “bad guy” 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️ people nowadays don’t want nothing, if your too nice they’ll take advantage of you, and vice versa
@praktiz74903 жыл бұрын
I work on a construction site where anything goes, any jokes are acceptable, the meaner the jokes the harder they laugh, jokes about race, disability, women, character assassination It's very hard for me to deal with it as I'm a short skinny Asian guy amongst 6 foot 4 alpha males especially during covid however I discovered that the reason why these alpha male stand tall and walk around with their head held high is because they be little and try to crush people like me down and by making me look bad they look good I have an imaginary bubble that protects me from comments and insults and sometimes they burst it but I rebuild even when things get physical I am now searching for a job with less male toxicity
@hdjfjd83 жыл бұрын
are u also a construction worker or your working some other role ?
@carichicago99423 жыл бұрын
I like the bubble idea 👌🏽
@brianoconnor19113 жыл бұрын
Sorry to hear that, sounds awful and not the type of environment you want to be spending 8 hours of your day in. I just left my job where there are some bullies even one said good riddance the day i was leaving..hard not to let it effect you but its not work letting it get in.
@lorsange11072 жыл бұрын
Female toxicity is worse. I mean, it's passive agressive and never ending.
@lindsaybraunston88583 жыл бұрын
Pro tip (Especially for women working with difficult men) Keep a chipper voice and be positive that way they know they can't get you down. Just be like "OKAY SOUNDS GREEAAATT!" or "COOL BEANS, WILL DO" 👍...works everytime and makes them even more angry.
@gircakes3 жыл бұрын
That’s what my mom does with customers who scream at her on the phone.
@Prophezora3 жыл бұрын
Kill 'em with kindness!
@nofapSally3 жыл бұрын
Lol. Nothing irks toxic folks more than resilience.
@Rarity44443 жыл бұрын
😂😂💯
@scottlavale15024 жыл бұрын
i would agree with most of the video .....but theres always situations where all these tricks arent applicable .. such as toxic employes that are boss pets or toxic because they know your boss needs them. The reason why they arent being fired is because they are lucrative to the compagny. Sometimes the problem is the boss for not dealing with the issues that is quite apparent. So it's not always about you having to configure your life in order to be this Zen co worker that always deals perfectly to each situation... or this person who has to taylor his actions so that everything goes well at work. I would contest and add that .... be yourself ....if something has to break ... let it break, the universe will compel you elsewhere. Nobody is worth trying to change yourself to the point of losing the confort of being yourself in order to not trigger those who push you. Because even if you manage to play A LOOF ... you end up bottleling your emotions and at one point it will explode. You can't use your mind to fool yourself on how you like or dislike something. Sure if you have a 200 000 a year job ...and tons of paiements .. you might want to consider your options....but not bend over to the toxic co workers. Trust me if you explode sometimes you might go overboard on things you say and not mean them or use violence depending on how bad it gets. You inner peace and balance isint worth any job. No point being a cameleon and try to fit in.
@audiekayy3 жыл бұрын
You have a good point. I’ve been trying to be patient and ignore this toxic coworker but it doesn’t seem to be doing anything. I talked to the manager about it but there has been no changes in her behavior. I’m on the verge of being straight up but i don’t want to cause a scene publicly.
@scottlavale15023 жыл бұрын
@@audiekayy sometimes ... the right move is chosing yourself and leaving. IT's sometimes scary to go into the unknown....but ive found that if you go out into the world with trust ....something greater comes along. I had too quit a 12 year old toxic job ...after it got too much after a new owner bought the business. Most of the time the toxic employe isin't the issue .. it's the owner or the situation. If its a small business and the guy is a guru at what he does but has a brain dead toxic temperment ... you might as well leave. If its a big place and the employe can be easely replace due to his bad ethics and work. Id say wing it and maybe wait till he sabotages himself. But after a while if it doesnt stop and you have given your warning.. perhaps talking to the big boss. If your productive and the other person isint as much and hes anoying the fuck out of everyone. The chances are on your side...if not then you can leave.
@audiekayy3 жыл бұрын
@scott lavalé I’ll probably just stick with it and see. I appreciate your thought out advice though and I’ll keep it in mind.
@shanehe7293 жыл бұрын
I’ve been in your situation. Totally feel you on how hard it is to bottle up. I would say having work homies helped so much. I know OP doesn’t encourage workplace friendships. But having allies that are genuinely supportive, whether it’s “single served” or a friendship withstands beyond the job, those people were and are my ultimate support system. I don’t have to even go into gossip or bad mouthing about the toxic coworker. They just get it and actually help me focus on the tasks at hand. And surviving that toxic person together actually bonded us more. Another thing to do is increase your visibility at work. So what if they are the bosses pet? If you can demonstrate what a collaborative contributor you can be do different people across the company, even if you don’t win the boss over, you can still have enough safety from gaining “the popular vote”
@firefly442203 жыл бұрын
Had plenty of these. I tried being nice, ignoring, threatening, everything. The harassment never stopped with one individual and we wound up in the office with the plant manager, supervisor and HR. I quit about 2 months later after about 5 years
@dejapayne7102 Жыл бұрын
Did management and HR end up putting the blame back on you ?
@geromejohnnygranada3 жыл бұрын
These are very good! I have a coworker who has been very toxic to me out of nowhere. I think some stuff at home is really messing with him and he's venting his frustration out on me. Which has been hard mainly because I was one of his few friends last year. But I will definitely be using these tips! I will be around them less, ignore them when they try to trick me into arguing, ask yes or no questions, and be positive. Thankfully my boss is very understanding and I have a good relationship with him.
@fitnesssoup75533 жыл бұрын
I am at work to accomplish objectives. I’m not there for arguments. I can handle anger. What I won’t is argumentative attitudes and insults.
@jayalexander90333 жыл бұрын
What are you supposed to do if you have a toxic co-worker and the manager is on their side and they're ganging up on you? That is a tough situation
@nca2933 жыл бұрын
It is...that was the situation I've been through for more than 3 months,...they tried to invalidate everything how I felt about the environment by saying "we never done that, we never said that"... They somehow made me questioned my memories because they kept invalidate things I say.. Luckily I've resigned few days ago 😌...And guess what, my coworkers stalking my Twitter and said "I'll watch everything you post from now on and I already screenshot everything you said before" 😌
@jayalexander90333 жыл бұрын
@@nca293 What they did is called gaslighting, making you feel crazy and questioning your sanity, blaming you for their shit.... good thing you left. Not a bad idea if you block them on social media, your life is non of their business and you wouldn't want their toxicity in your presence and to have any painful reminders...
@lovelymelanin933611 ай бұрын
@@nca293Sue her for stalking!
@mjdedge34403 жыл бұрын
The over-sharing thing. I see people do this all the time to people that hate them. In my head, I'm like "Why would you tell them that?" It's like giving bullets to the enemy during the war!?! Tell 'em nothing. If they ask for your opinion on ANYTHING, just say "I'm not sure" or "I'd have to think about that" People with narcissistic parents/sibling tell them really personal stuff...Are you crazy? Even family that are mean, should be told nothing. I read a reddit post about a lady who said her mother always causes trouble, and she told her mother, IN ADVANCE, what she was planning to name her child....so the mother proceeded to make a huge issue of it. I'd have waited until after the child was named. None of granny's business what the child is called. Telling her in advance is like asking her opinion...like you'd want it! LOL
@laurenp10132 жыл бұрын
You are completely right but it’s hard when all you want is acceptance from the narcissist. They know exactly how to treat you in the moment so you let your guard down, to then use your words against you in a blindside. It’s such a mindfuck dealing with narcissists…I wear my heart on my sleeve and unfortunately fall for their BS. I regret opening up immediately after whenever dealing with these people.
@taay_thegreat20572 жыл бұрын
For me the over sharing is from my anxiety and then after I said it I really hate myself and say why did I tell them that they hate me!
@taay_thegreat20572 жыл бұрын
@@laurenp1013 so relatable
@brad95483 жыл бұрын
Say to him/her- "I know that you are being toxic with me now because you are hurting on the inside, I can't help you with that, but if you need a hug, I am here for you." They will wonder what the hell just happened and they will leave you alone for a while.
@patsyghannie2212 жыл бұрын
Naw I wouldn't or couldn't see myself touch them with a 10 ft pole! NOT on my watch
@patsyghannie2212 жыл бұрын
Toxic people will never be able to leave you alone it's not in there nature. Stay far away from them Don't ask them for SHIT!
@daviddoyle20853 жыл бұрын
I have a group of them at work, they’ve been there a long time and they think they have the right to just boss me about. I’ve noticed recently they are shutting me out of all sorts and they don’t even acknowledge me at all now. However there is a toxic atmosphere due to layoffs which has only escalated things. At the moment I’m just trying to keep my head down and get on with my own work until things settle down but trying to work out how best to come out of the other side. I was thinking of trying to do something nice for the staff but last time I did that it wasn’t very much appreciated at all and just feel like I can’t win at times.
@Rob-bv6ew2 жыл бұрын
Though your advice tends to me for workers in office spaces in corporate America, I take bits and pieces from them. I got to work in a new area for the same company, different team etc. I made it my mission to not talk negatively about another person. Now, I'll have a reputation for not doing that, which means that people may talk about me, but nobody can say I talk about others, and there will be less 'ammo' for anyone to have a dig at me with. I had a very toxic co-worker who became a HR issue. I used a diplomatic pen, offered to apologize to make things right, and they were backed off. It's almost an art form. If I offer peace, HR has more of a stance 'with' me. Though, I'll say I need to establish boundaries immediately. No, has to be no, and then NO! Thanks for the vid.
@Tikolico6 ай бұрын
That co-worker that seems to keep to him or her self and everyone seems to not like very much, is probably the most level headed, reasonable and least dramatic person in the whole place... toxicity and drama rules today's workplace. The thing I liked about working construction back in the day was that if someone had bad enough beef with you, it would get solved with fists, so people did not so easily run their mouth and just minded their own business more, these days it's a damn battlefield of psychological warfare.
@MisterMikeTexas3 жыл бұрын
Myself, I've talked back to them, I've given smartass responses that pissed them off, and when they've tried to order me around when they had no authority to do so, I just refused to do as they said, or did something else. That really pissed one such person off one time.
@viviancastillo3222 жыл бұрын
I blocked all my coworkers on social media 😂😂😂😂😂😂 you don’t know my life and I don’t know yours! Simple!!!! I’m also very selective about “happy hour” or work related events invites. 😇
@SpaceCadete1015 ай бұрын
I'm trying being as friendly and professional as I would be with a customer. I hate the way some interactions make me feel ill in side. I'm interpreting a bad feeling about someone as a sign to offer peace. When this happens I try and find a place of love inside and imagine offering that energy to them. Trying to be brave and feel love not fear. Thank you for your channel. My moment to moment mission is to feel good.
@brooked24953 жыл бұрын
I have a coworker that regularly talks about her personal life (not things that are appropriate to share at work like drugs, sex, and alcohol) (btw we are registered nurses). She has been a nurse for one month and this is her first nursing job and I’ve been a nurse for over two years working in the hospital setting. This new job is a much simpler office job (all we do is start IVs and do infusions). She is full time and I am part time. I started working here one week before her but it’s only been about a month for both of us. Every time our training nurse leaves the room this coworker is constantly criticizing me or correcting me on things that are really none of her business. For example: I checked someone’s blood sugar by pricking their finger and gave them a gauze instead of a bandaid which is really the standard. Most diabetic patients don’t use bandaids when they check their sugars because they’d use up to five bandaids a day, always have one on their finger, and they don’t bleed but for just a few seconds. This coworker comes to me to say “it’s always a good rule of thumb to use a bandaid after you check someone’s sugar.” Even though I only used maybe ten bandaids total in my two years at the hospital. And this is just an example. She does small things like this ALL day trying to tell me how to be a nurse instead of trusting my basic nursing judgement. Once she was saying she was from a family of millionaires and I mentioned that i had grown up in a financially modest home and my dad even experienced episodes of homelessness. She said “oh so you really think you’ve achieved something by being a nurse.” To which I replied “I absolutely do.” She tries to control everything and treats even the patients like this (like telling them they can’t get unhooked to go to bathroom- they can). She is extremely entitled- even took over the head nurses desk. She tells me to do things when I’m in the middle of doing something else. Then gets huffy when I don’t do it right away (she is not my boss). She withholds information like which patient she is working on or what she’s doing which makes things difficult for me because we work as a team. She always says “I could do this by myself” and is overly confident. It’s just a matter of time before she hurts a patient because instead of learning or being careful she already knows it all. I am about to quit my job even though I just started because I CANNOT TAKE IT!!! I try to be positive and laugh it off in my mind thinking she doesn’t even know what she doesn’t know because she’s a new nurse (does that make sense?). But it’s really starting to get under my skin. PLEASE advise!
@Jolisa892 жыл бұрын
It's terrible how it only takes one person to create a toxic work environment. I'm sure your work is already stressful and having to deal with this is not helpful at all. I hope you're doing better now.
@brooked24952 жыл бұрын
Yes I’m doing better now. I fact, this person and I have learned to get along… however, it didn’t happen naturally. Eventually I had to stand up for myself which didn’t go over well with her at the time. But since that day, she has stepped waaaay back. She’s still an awful person but it’s not directed at me so idc. Honestly I feel really sorry for her. I’ve realized the root of her behavior; she doesn’t feel adequate enough in her own eyes so she is constantly trying to prove her worth to others. She puts herself on a pedestal, brags, and exaggerates her achievements but knows what she is saying isn’t true. For example: one day I overheard her on the phone saying she was “keeping tabs” on me and the other staff in the office to make herself seem like she was the boss at her job. I called her out on it and she played it off but she knew she wasn’t the boss and was just trying to make herself look “better” to the customer service representative she was taking to. That’s a sad life. Could you imagine feeling so inadequate that you feel the need to impress total strangers who you’ll never meet or speak to again?! 😭😭😭 I just want to tell her she is good enough 😢
@b-41subject57 Жыл бұрын
@@brooked2495 tell her to mind her business. That will set her off! Lol. I hope things are better.
@brooked2495 Жыл бұрын
Update: she didn’t last a year. She quit. Turns out the doctor we worked for didn’t like her at all. She lost custody of her children. Not long after the head nurse found another job making more money. Guess who the head nurse is now😊
@auniversalwoman Жыл бұрын
@@brooked2495I'm glad that the story has a happy ending. The Japanese have a saying that goes along the lines of, " If you are great at what you do, you won't have to tell anyone" You can tell when someone brags or acts like they're the best, that they're really feeling inadequate inside. Good for you for outlasting her.
@javid42883 жыл бұрын
I am working in Germany and I had a coworker from Thailand, he was really rude and arrogant. His sarcastic language was really toxic. He even tried to wreck my family by saying things that trigger my wife when we had colleagues and family gatherings at work. I never worked with such a person before and he was my nightmare. I didn't react at all at that time because first of all I was in my probation period and second of all I knew that he is gonna play innocent so I tried not to act stupid. I was lucky that I could move to another team. I feel so bad for people that have to work with him.
@hdjfjd83 жыл бұрын
next time record his behaviour secretly on ur phone then show it to the higher authorities
@javid42883 жыл бұрын
@@hdjfjd8 I don't have to do that anymore. I found a great job starting from next month.
@Darl-ur3uq Жыл бұрын
@@javid4288 I hope you're fine in the new job
@jessicamythis87823 жыл бұрын
I’ll try to use these... but it’s kind of difficult when the person is your supervisor and actually enjoys screaming at you from across the room that you’re a slow worker. I’ve actually seen her do it to two other people and they both quit and now it’s my turn
@JenniferBrick3 жыл бұрын
Toxic boss is another story. That needs an escape plan I unless you can avoid that specific supervisor.
@taylorpresley46043 жыл бұрын
Document everything, go to her superiors and if they refuse to reprimand her find an attorney.
@taylorpresley46043 жыл бұрын
@dev null You might lose your job but you can always find another one. Don't let anyone abuse you.
@liveinthemoment4193 жыл бұрын
I wish your messages reach millions of people. Thank you for tackling topics that no one talks about openly. We need leaders like you to start the movement.
@MrHall-it1uh3 жыл бұрын
I use to be social at work but when ppl started gossiping about me I stopped being social silence is the best answer in the work place most of the time and if they still come at u wrong when your being silent get them straight in a professional way
@josephcolon74623 жыл бұрын
I just read a comment " I love my job, I just hate the treatment I'm getting :( " SOOO TRUE!! I'm damn good at my job and what I do but I just hate when I have to leave my station to go to the bathroom or stock something really quick and I ask everyone at my station if they can please watch my screen and make sure that my orders don't get to piled up while I'm away.. The SAME way that I do for them every single time they asked me to do it but then when I come back it literally looks like no one helped me whatsoever. So when the boss comes back around, he takes look at my screen and thinks that I've just been doing nothing all day. then he wants to sit there and lecture me on how to do my job but doesn't want to take the time to listen to anything I have to say when I try to explain to him why it's like that in the first place. He literally says whatever he has to say and as soon as I start to speak, he turns around and just walks away, as if only what he says matters. It truly... TRULY makes me want to spit in his face sometimes for acting so disrespectful. With the proper training and adequate time. I could run circles around you in your own job title, Jeremy.
@shivanighai3213 Жыл бұрын
Honestly it mentally drains me when the particular toxic person is on shift with me. She’s so loud and delegates what people should do while she waltzes around the store. Sometimes it gets too much and I go home and cry. It just feels like I’m an alien sometimes. The way I’ve been coping is not talking to colleagues unless I need to. I work in retail so I only need to focus on what my supervisors or managers tell me. It’s crazy how I can put on a huge smile for customers but as soon as I’m all alone at home I break down over it.
@mythoughts6922 Жыл бұрын
I recently worked with a destructive Narcissist, that was 60 and very good at it and extremely mental. And was plotting against another toxic co-worker I had worked with at another job. So she told the other all my business. When I told the D.N. I did not want to gossip, she turned on me. And they and the ex co-worker ganged up on me, and with the other ones sister ( nepotism) that was also toxic. The boss that hired me was fired, and they te hired the hot mess that was 10 states away. So the mice would play when the cat was 10 states away. And she was a massive gas lighter, and horrible manager. A girl quit and said that she was a liar and gas lighter.
@stevenhall44442 жыл бұрын
One of my biggest issues when it comes to working with other people is them starting problems with me on purpose. I don't know why I seem to be always the target of other people's hatred. Everything always start out fine until they start to get to know me and that's usually when alm the trouble starts. I do my best to ignore there inappropriate comments and behavior but they never stop or get caught doing it. And I have no Choice but to defend myself and I have no clue as to why I'm always the target for these toxic people. No matter how many times I try and politely get them to stop nothing happens and even when I go to the boss. Nothing happens cause even the bosses where in on it. Everytime I have worked for someone in the last couple of years each everytime I started to work for them their professionalism goes right out the window. And I end up harassed both visually and verbally if not sexually assaulted only for them to get away with it or I get blamed even if I wasn't the one to cause it. There's only so much a person can block out to stay professional but I'm always the one getting screwed over and being blamed for what they did even tho I was defending myself from them. This why I want to work for myself so dang bad just to avoid the perverts and bs starters. Cause no matter where I go they always seem to find me and start the bs all over again. And I'm so tired of having to deal with other people's unprofessional and inappropriate behaviors while on the job. When I go to work I'm not looking to make friends or find a lover it is a job not a hangout spot. I go there to make money and be on my way with none of the extra bs.
@butterflymoon63683 жыл бұрын
I'm probably guilty of this. We had a toxic work environment and there were so many terrible people (people who ignore you if you were 'lower' than them, people who ridicule you) so I felt comfort in saying 'X is such an asshole' because other people were on the receiving end of their sh. I thought it was okay because I needed to vent and also I was doing it about people who were already awful. I would never say it about anyone who was sweet, kind, neutral. Anyway, I realise it was a bad habit so I don't do it any more. I think instead it's just better to leave a toxic job... which I am working on.
@TheYummyStrawberry3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. I’m currently on the way to work and I was dreading attending the daily meeting I have with this one coworker. I feel a lot more self aware and ready to take on the day
@skoolsuxalot11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for making this video ❤ I'm currently in the bathroom at work trying to be less irritated and emotional about my toxic co-worker, and watching this helped.
@danjohnson55612 жыл бұрын
I deal with the toxicity every day and I block them all out. People are cruel and when they have a low self esteem they try to bring you down with them and I don't let that into my life. I've got more important things to worry about in my life therefore I block them out. My thoughts are if they are talking about me they're leaving others alone
@araung212 жыл бұрын
I found you after my wife was dealing with nosy coworkers after her second day on the floor,. She is going to try to implement these strategies today. Thank you and will use some of these top in my remote environment.
@LaPotraBellaca2 жыл бұрын
I had a coworker that I didn't know very well ask me if I was the first person in my family to go to college. I knew that he was askin me that to try and undermine me so I said "no, a lot of my family members have bachelors and masters degrees and it shut his ass up real quick.
@imdifferent7294 Жыл бұрын
OMG wow.
@raccuia13 жыл бұрын
In my 10 years working in other offices before I started my business I was lucky to not work with toxic people. A few idiots but not toxic.
@Darl-ur3uq Жыл бұрын
I'd take an idiot over a toxic person anyday eventhoigh the toxic fu_cks are the real idots here This is fascinating tho, what is this job that doesn't have toxics rats
@nnikkij77774 жыл бұрын
I have a co-worker who constantly tries to critique the quality of my work in meetings instead of bringing the matter to me directly. I've spoken to her directly and asked her to contact me directly telling her that if she has an issue to speak to my direct supervisor or my director if she feels she can't speak to me directly. Trying to make me look bad because I completed your work in a meeting is making our entire department look disfunctional... She's now trying to turn my team against me. What should I do.
@JenniferBrick4 жыл бұрын
First, the thing that is most obvious to me is she is deeply insecure. She likely sees success and/or potential in you that she does not have and is jealous and lashing out. Start with empathy, but then set some serious boundaries.
@nnikkij77774 жыл бұрын
@@JenniferBrick Thank you for your reply.. I'm definitely going to try this.
@JenniferBrick4 жыл бұрын
@@nnikkij7777 keep me posted on how it goes!
@HelloKamesan3 жыл бұрын
In terms of Tip #3, some larger companies would have more specific guidelines on how to deal with harassment and usually involves going up the management chain or going to someone in HR who handles those types of issues. If things are not clear, by all means, you should follow those guidelines and either go up the chain of command or to HR for guidance. Taking the decision to act upon yourself without that first step may bring more harm to yourself rather than resolve the situation.
@amandaperez81753 жыл бұрын
I dislike it so much when upper management talks about others poorly, And especially when there 2 faces,I always know usually 100 percent of the time those ones end up leaving so unprofessional
@cori4207 ай бұрын
Unfortunately I am trapped with my toxic coworker 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. She is so negative and miserable and mean. We are the only 2 people in our workspace and my interactions with other coworkers is minimal. I am so exhausted and I don’t know that to do. Whether I am assertive or just ignore it, she just continues to be the same or it gets even worse. She’s truly one of the worst people I’ve ever met.
@wuewuewuewuewue68633 жыл бұрын
Second day at work and my coworkers were judging my work.. not even quietly so I just ignored. It’s a small business and I know the manager wouldn’t do anything.
@marksevastipol19463 жыл бұрын
It's funny I'm really shy and only talk to a few people,. So alot of them started talking blatantly mocking me I really don't care anymore 😂😂. Thought I just stay positive and live in their head rent free cause all they think about is me and I think about work and get to listen to music life is great.
@arcticfox223 жыл бұрын
Im dealing with this right now at work where a coworker is constantly undermining me and making snide indirect comments about me to other people. I can’t figure out whether I should address this up front or let them go on until they get bored
@aaronaustrie3 жыл бұрын
Great advice Mam. I haven't gotten a job that I'm comfortable with yet but when I do the first thing Imma do is observe the environment and also rid myself off toxicity. I'm hoping your vids will help me when I seeking a career in my field
@kimberlybriggs93227 ай бұрын
Thank you..the withholding of information was a big one
@mstwelvedeadlycyns2 жыл бұрын
I got fired for not being able to deal with toxic co-workers and because I stood up for myself. I wish I watched this video before getting the ax. This is the stuff that is not being addressed in those videos when starting a job especially under the workplace bullying section.
@makeupandmusicgirlАй бұрын
So my toxic coworker is one of my supervisors. I’m not sure he means to be malicious (I have a hard time reading people) but he puts people down, speaks to everyone like they’re below him, and always makes me feel like I’m two inches tall. It has started spilling over into other areas of my life, affecting my confidence about everything. I’m working on my own emotional detachment. Thank you for your videos, and if anyone has advice, I’d love to hear it. (If it helps, I work in retail, so it’s not an office setting.)
@Joe-mz6dc Жыл бұрын
You definitely cannot use the kill them with love technique if they are psychopaths or sociopaths. If anything that might make things even worse because they will know you're on to them and they will possibly increase their attention and negative efforts against you.
@4040smokey Жыл бұрын
So true. There is little that can be done except recognizing it and distance as much as possible. Getting any type of response is there nut. Any type.
@crystall982 жыл бұрын
I just dealt with a toxic AF coworker and I’m here to take notes .