12-Year-Old is Looking at Porn (What Should We Do?)

[@nicktimestwo]

Gen Z, Gen Alpha. That's our life. We all started real early. Teach them to be responsible, they're gonna get access to it somehow.

[@Bringon-dw8dx]

Amen.

[@lapris7380]

As an 18 year old girl very true! Even if you didn’t find it yourself/hear about it at home you will definitely hear it at school. I heard kids talking about it in my middle school library so I got on my phone and searched it up at home. Got kinda addicted to it for years but luckily I haven’t touched that stuff in years. It’s proven to be very damaging so I understand why people try to keep it away. Honestly parents shouldn’t be giving their kids electronics. Have a house computer for the family & homework and when they are old enough to pay for it themselves they can get a phone/laptop of their own. If you see that they’ve found it educate them but before they can go ahead and block the sites. You can block them on your phone and computer so theres no reason they should be able to find it in the house. Outside of the house though you’re screwed. They will find it one way or another so educate, educate, educate!

[@sablenarwhale3574]

@@lapris7380 yeah my old friend told me the website been addicted for 5 years from 12-17

[@lalalalala198]

@@lapris7380 same I’m an 18 year old girl now but when I was about 11 and would sneak my phone in my room at night one day I decided to just google some pictures of people having sex because I wanted to see what it looked like 💀. Then that eventuality lead to me finding p websites but thank god my parents never found out (or at least they never confronted me because eventually the WiFi blocked those kind of sites so maybe they figured out I was doing it but didn’t wanna talk about it). I definitely got kinda addicted too for a few years and I ended up having a few terrible dreams that every time I think about them make me feel disgusted because I was like why tf was my brain coming up with that.

[@Jinger17]

Can we focus on how amazing this man and his wife are? They did not have to do that. Parenting is hard work! Kudos to them for stepping up for these kids!

[@raymondkymsuttle]

The reason kids lie, and ALL of us lie, is because we’ve learned that there’s usually NO REWARD for telling the truth. If you lie, you might get away with it, but if you tell the truth you’re guaranteed to be exposed & probably punished. So if you want people to tell the truth you have to make it SAFE TO DO SO.

[@LebohangMmihi]

If paremts can apply this early on in a child's life, then kids can grow up with healthy minds

[@TruckerWife]

We tell my daughter that she will get in more trouble if she lies, but if she's honest, the discipline will be minimal.

[@SR01868]

word. the classic i wont get mad and then they get pissed. easily the worst trust breaker.

[@thehenrystuart4370]

​@@TruckerWifeI wonder how effective that is. Like, I'm not criticizing, but genuinely wondering. My parents were absurdly kind and liberal with me, they spoiled me a lot, even when I fucked up they wouldn't discipline me or take things way. This definitely wasn't very helpful during my adolescence (I stopped studying at age 15, they wouldn't let me not go to school so I'd just sleep there lol), and I was just overall rebel-ish. However, now at age 32, I run my own business, have an apartment, travel the world, exercise daily, have an amazing social life and live a genuinely happy life. I have never tried alcohol, drugs nor anything, yet I lived pretty wild experiences (I was a musician playing every night going on cool adventures, so yeah, it was fun lol). I am not saying their style is necessarily optimal, but I definitely learned that whatever happened they'd always love me, even if I fucked up, and this helped me a ton when I achieved a certain degree of maturity. To me, having them in my life is the greatest blessing a human could go possibly have on this earth. So I feel like making your children feel loved is the. most important thing, even if they do turn out a little bit spoiled it's easier to recover from this than lack of love.

[@TruckerWife]

@thehenrystuart4370 Well, she's 4, and so idk how effective it is either. We are just trying to instill in her that she can tell us anything and that we won't freak out as long as she tells us the truth. My parents were strict compared to today's standards. Lol. They ran a company and I worked since I was 9. I was a horrendous teenager. I wasn't at home for 2.5 years. One older brother left when he was 17. The oldest got kicked out. We were all insane. (We had all been through trauma that we hid from my parents for years.) And then we grew up. 2 of us are happily married with kids. I have the best marriage out of any of them even though I was the most unhealthy earlier. It really is about knowing you are loved. But it is also about the values you instill in your kids. My parents engrained in us that being a decent human being and giving to others and doing what you can for people is basic human decency. We are Christians, so they taught us that above that was biblical for Christians. We knew they would sacrifice the world for us. We are all tight-knit now, and they have our backs, but will honestly tell us we are dumb if we are being dumb. Lol.

[@jaype331]

This is much more common than anyone knows I bet

[@LinkMan-wl3qv]

Yup, I started when I was 12

[@HUEMOB]

Yeah im pretty sure age isnt the problem here its childhood trauma. As far as I know most guys start masturbating and watching porn at 12 or 13 years old. I started both at 12 and ive never had a problem with it.

[@KatieDeGo]

I think it's common for teens to be curious about sex. However, adult videos set up extremely unrealistic expectations and misogynistic views.

[@TheTierlist1]

@@KatieDeGo Most certainly, the videos ive seen look like it would hurt not to mention what I've heard of some of them glorizing topics like SA or r*pe. The whole industry of that is messed up because a lot of the women you see in those videos don't want to be in that industry but were dragged into it regardless.

[@user-tz8qi]

yeah its normal bc i started to feel this urge at the same age..

[@matts4294]

A man with a heart of gold calling a wise man. A truly character building conversation.

[@mowerds33]

Kudos to William for stepping up, and taking care of family when he didn't have to.

[@mirabella2154]

Absolutely. That's a fine man. And the same can be said about his wife.

[@LadyK007]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@Josh-bk3pt]

I don't have a teen yet but I don't believe in taking away electronics completely. When I was younger that was just overkill with my parents, too controlling when they didn't know when to give it back.

[@Josh-bk3pt]

@k-mart7475 game boy advance 🫡 I had good grades to earn it first.

[@jaryncoleman208]

How old are you

[@DownBadAutistic]

I don't plan to have kids if anything I'll adopt, and I hate the idea of taking electronics purely because the internet is my only outlet for my good and my bad emotions and I contact the suicide hotline every so often so without it it's like breaking a bone and trying to heal without help from a professional

[@suggestagoodnameformeplz1035]

​@@DownBadAutisticI'm not trying to invalidate your feelings and your methods to regulate them but people only being able to find certain emotional outlets through the Internet is part of the problem with it, as someone who was chronically online a few years ago when I was in an awful place, because I hadn't learnt better ways to or alternatives should I say to better my mental state, I held on to this online connection and it was very unhealthy, took me a long time to fix it.

[@tiannanelson8986]

They didn't have to. Thats the point.

[@kingbeastofburden9231]

The children are mourning. They need grief counseling. They have had a lot of loss.

[@jaryncoleman208]

I think they gotten taken at 5 he said he’s 7 years in and the boy is 12

[@meggrotte4760]

I can't help but wonder if perhaps they got hurt from because of their parents behavior

[@2shy1151]

I'm surprised that there was no connection made with the timing of the boys difficulties in school with the return of his biological father in his life. It has to have opened up some old wounds and he has no coping mechanisms for the feelings/memories that are coming up.

[@rosannastott]

there are no benefits of pornography. no words can truly convey how i feel about pornography. I hate it. pornography destroys relationships, creates unrealistic expectations, but most of all, it ruins your brain, its like a drug. it causes violence against women, vulnerable people and children. mentally ill people watch these videos, and genuinely think that they can do those sick and perverted things to people because they cannot comprehend why it is not okay and it has become so normalised everywhere. young people are being exposed to it at a young age in some shape or form, and it is ruining their lives. ban pornography.

[@destinynaulta1022]

As someone that grew up (now 27) with a parent that is an addict, I wish my mother (single mother with her own struggles) had this advice… this is powerful… please keep doing what you’re doing. I’m not sure where you got your wisdom but I’m glad you’re spreading/sharing it with others!!

[@williamwallace4080]

I'm 26 and most of the people in school started at 12-13. I've recently decided to go cold turkey

[@Rosieblue111]

My ex partner was abused as a child and started watching porn at 10. He became a porn addict and went on to do something illegal because of it. It messed him up so so much. I can’t begin to go into how harmful this is. I’m still receiving therapy for what he did whilst we were together. He destroyed our family.

[@reneeantwi-boasiako3974]

I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤

[@jaryncoleman208]

Damn hope you’re ok and he gravely needs help and theraoy

[@Rosieblue111]

@@jaryncoleman208 He did get some help, if it was enough I don’t know. Thankyou for your comment.

[@JackMason-oq8lf]

These sex perverts are a menace to the safety of bedrooms everywhere. You have to constantly be on the lookout for this dangerous stuff. Call your best friends and warn them that you just encountered this awful stuff on a website called - - - - -

[@247Clips-km6mp]

pron screws people up. So glad I quit

[@jessicasnyder4507]

We walked this route as well. Unfortunately, it wad more of a struggle than we could bare. Trauma in children raised in these addictive parents behaviors is hard. Especially if you get them later. We did all the therapy and treatments for our oldest nephew and it ended bad anyways. I'm praying for you and your family!

[@WoodsSooperDooperShop]

Don't beat yourself up over it, you probably still changed their life for the better, no matter where they are right now

[@magdalenapichler4182]

We had two foster children of heroin addicts in our home when I was fourteen. It was a mess led by misjudgement of youth welfare and my mum. She could't integrate them into a functioning daily routine. They were seeking drama every day. I was so glad that we had to moove and that there was a date when they had to leave us. Never again!

[@KatieDeGo]

Most likely because of the chaos of their early life. If your baseline is chaos, your brain cannot process calm well.

[@cleppermarketing4155]

Was exposed at 11 when puberty started in me and have struggled with it ever since. If I knew the struggles I'd have from it I never would of done it. Struggle with social interactions with the opposite gender and no matter how normal I act women act with borderline disgust, especially the women near my age. Friendships I have are detached and even with Family Members.

[@djlivvy46]

Are you neuro divergent?

[@Carter-nl2]

Just you bro😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Miner_20]

This is not due to pron

[@AlexSmith-xk8tz]

I see you have the addicts on your comment trying to make you as a liar. I believe you!

[@Miner_20]

@@AlexSmith-xk8tz you can have perfect social skills even if u watch adult content

[@d4rkblu386]

This is super common. I'm only 20, I remember classmates at school talking about having seen pornography at that age. The Internet makes it so insanely easy to access that a massive percentage of young people are addicted to some degree. Like, it's in your pocket, by your bed, all day, every day, just a few clicks away. This sounds dramatic, but internet porn is one of the worst things to ever happen to people my age. It just destroys people

[@ianeagle40nil]

You need to challenge a habitual liar not to lie for 24 hours. It will take a few attempts. It is VERY hard to stop. Remind them how tiring it is to have to remember all those lies, all the time. Point out how good it feels not to have to, after he does his first 24 hrs. You tell them to instantly correct themselves if they do. If you think they are lying, ask: Do you have a better answer ? Good luck, and don’t get angry. Be patient and loving. Keep it simple.. ☮️

[@bilbobaggins4403]

The worst thing for kids to experience is neglect...no eye contact.

[@DevonBarger]

I was exposed when I was 8 and it slowly became an addiction. I fought it for 6 years. I'm 15 now, almost 16. It has ruined my ability to have healthy connections and relationships with the opposite sex. I've been fighting relapse for a long time but it's getting better now. It is a lot bigger problem than people realize. Nowadays, this things are already in our homes. All we have to do is tap a button. I have personally seen in myself and my friends that the internet and the people on it are attacking us kids with porn online. I know that it's a real war. Parents need to be completely open and aware with their kids about these things.

[@seriouslythowhite5785]

Your self awareness and willingness to be forthright about your experience and observations are very admirable! I'm impressed, and as an adult I appreciate your insight. This has been something I feared for my daughter but also all of your geneeration. I claim the victory over your continued deliverance in the name of Jesus Christ!

[@Joesnapper]

exposed somewhere in kinder and i have no clue how because i have an amazing homelife i dont get it and now im 13 and ive failed to stop it now, idk where to start fighting it

[@DevonBarger]

💯

[@DevonBarger]

What do you mean by exposed?

[@Joesnapper]

@@DevonBarger i just kinda found it 😔

[@Tachibana-p9e]

This man is a hero. God bless you, William.

[@countcoupblessings979]

Sometimes the neurology of the children of drug addicts can be affected . Seemingly nuerotypical , even smart cookies can be prone to things like less impulse control etc . Everyones heard of fetal alcohol syndrome, well theres a spectrum of extra stuff that can present for kids of drug users , few people talk about that . Hope this family is doing well and they have great supports . Definately its gotta be hard on the kids subconciously though , knowing they were basically abandned. they ought to have greif counceling . Could be that too.

[@mowerds33]

One way to have internet control, is put the router and modem in you bedroom, so you can turn them off at night.

[@WyattH]

You can also get a smart router that automatically blocks different devices at certain times

[@TartarianTopG]

Nice!

[@allaboutroofing2]

My sister does just that. Also limited on total access time per day and internet history is tracked thru a VPN function and can't be tampered with.

[@16handsoffunfunfun]

Thank you!

[@nancyosorio4515]

Oh thank you for this.

[@J3nJ3nl0llip0p]

Child of addicted people here: the way Doc described the utter disconnection of and emptiness of addicted people and the lack of interaction even when they're staring you dead in your face. The back and forth journal would have worked for me. Instead, I got addiction. I'm about as over that as I'm going to get, I'm a few months away from 50 with a 9 year old who's having some troubles at school. Journal time. Thanks, Dr. John, you totally P.R. mofo❤️❤️❤️

[@ghostophelia2245]

Children start younger and younger. Really sad. My little sister started at 8 years old. The internet wants your children! Think about how much innuendo and temptation you see just browsing. An innocent childs curiosity doesnt stand a chance. The only solution is to keep them away from unsupervised internet. No one needs internet. Password, password, PASSWORD

[@sufferyetgain]

Problem is porn not internet you can easily block certain sites without being controlling

[@ghostophelia2245]

@changingslow yeah, it's not just porn. If you think just blocking sites keep your kids safe, your wrong. I've never heard a good reason that a child needs a screen. We survived thousands of years without it, your kid can wait until they're old enough to handle kt

[@sufferyetgain]

@@ghostophelia2245 Teaching your kids basic things like enjoying time outside and that people are weird alone will protect your kids the problem is nobody wants to parent anymore. Internet is how i found so much of my taste of music when i was younger and the stuff brings me nostalgia now. Internet never was the problem its ppl not parenting anymore it’s sad.

[@ghostophelia2245]

@changingslow I envy your ignorance. If you knew the level of pedophilia and hackers, i don't think you'd be saying that. Guess what? A library has music. You don't need internet for that. Just the same as I wouldn't allow my kid to go wander the streets alone, I wouldn't let my kids visit the internet alone. It's not something kids or parents can control. It's everyone else. Kids are very impressionable. It's a very scary world we live in, unfortunately and people want to force their kids to grow up instead of just being kids. NO KID NEEDS INTERNET UNSUPERVISED PERIOD

[@blueStarKitt7924]

​@@sufferyetgainNot anymore?🤔 It's more like society has changed and is seemingly more complex.

[@Sarahhannahtx]

I wish I had of had you to listen to when my son was really young.

[@cooliipie]

I did, so did all my friends. I'm 31 years old now. 🎉

[@sherryd3299]

John you didn't discuss the porn. I would have liked you to tell this father that he needs to tell this boy in a nonjudgemental way that porn degrades women and you'd like to teach the boy to respect women. I wouldn't remove all electronics from the home because most jobs involve being very good at and up-to-date about all things computer and social media eetc. He will have trouble finding a decent job without those skills. Plus in school as he gets older they will be told to submit papers electronically. Also it's shaming him. He shouldn't be shamed. He needs to know that wanting to see porn in normal but porn is fake, it's a lie and can be very distructive in relationships when he starts to date. I became an adult in the 1980's I can't tell you how many young men thought regular young women would behave like porn actresses. They would wan't me to do things I'd never even heard of. When I didn't want a threesome or didn't want to video it or didin't want to do an activity they thought I had sexual problems. They thought porn was real and the norm. It's so bad now that men think sending a picture of their p*nis to a woman they just met is flirting. John you never got around to talking about the actual porn and how to steer a normal young boy to more positive ideas of sex and and relationships. If you remove all electronics from the home it will shame him.

[@Luxx24]

I would love to see a deeper dive into that topic as well.

[@blueStarKitt7924]

​@@Luxx24Same.

[@Miner_20]

Well then ig im not the problem lol i just use it sometimes it doesnt affect me much

[@carlosa4852]

Porn can also empower women, however.

[@inkpearls3364]

When John first started this show (if you listen to his episodes from 2-3 yrs ago) he was very vocal against porn. I have noticed that over time he has changed & he now doesn’t seem nearly as anti-porn as he seemed previously. He seems to now make excuses for porn use & he calls it “normal”. WRONG. That is the wrong word to use. It is “COMMON” but sure isn’t “normal”. I am sick of men & their excuses to sexually objectify women. They think that bc they see wh0res in porn videos doing & acting certain ways then that is what all women want & should behave. Another thing that they say is that if a married man is watching porn then its the wifes fault. LMAO I think NOT. A porn addict has a mental & spiritual illness like any other addict. They use porn bc THEY have a problem WITHIN THEMSELVES. Men just love to sling blame. Smh Also, when are men going to stop supporting child sex trafficking?

[@hunternewsom-g3j]

i was showed it at 8 and watched it for like 2 months and then quit til i was 13

[@Birdman0169]

Same

[@PoeticAmmunition.]

Who the heck is showing it to 8 yr olds 😢

[@Birdman0169]

I showed myself

[@NiKi-ij2ln]

Hyper alert for the bad stuff, its like we are in WAR. 😢

[@dreck250]

Lmao how does any of what this is relate to war😂

[@NiKi-ij2ln]

@@dreck250 read between lines, its a metaphor, like we are in War. How you are in war, you need to be hyper alert on the battlefield.

[@dreck250]

@@NiKi-ij2ln lmao ok then😂

[@JackMason-oq8lf]

People shooting stuff at you from all over.

[@inkpearls3364]

@@JackMason-oq8lfdon’t bother… he has already fried his brain.

[@0seve291]

12 yr old boy will look if they come across it use internet/phone filters!!!!!!

[@oregoncoastmama3004]

12 year old girls too. I most definitely would have at that age. But i was 12 in 1992, so old school vhs back then. 😂🤣

[@szatanowska]

Really? Great way how to learn to be a prostituted at 12 , kids should be protected at 12

[@laurent.9968]

But there is something called a vpn, if they find out what a VPN is then they can use it to watch porn. The parents would also need to block access to VPNs too.

[@0seve291]

@@laurent.9968 im not teck saavy 🫠

[@Miner_20]

​@@laurent.9968not possible, just dont let em spend money online

[@kendalladams5975]

I think teaching kids their choices affects their lives. Not someone withholding something is so huge! I do it with my littles all the time.

[@gavinsolberg-gl3yy]

It's not advice I can give but at 16 i was drinking beer smoking pot having a good time at 30 all i had left was rehab and jail I'm now 54 and still useing no one gets it first time . As long as you have the will you're made the first step good luck

[@Panteradoublebass]

What’s crazy William. Is still you continue to give. You keep doing what you need to do as parents! Their parents. I honor yall!!!!

[@tressamunoz]

This man is a good Dad! Keep it up!

[@spaRKLES88604]

I started at watching at 13 as a boy. Porn is boring nowadays I don’t like it much. But hey I found out I was gay by watching

[@pablopedro8598]

I really wish I would’ve never been exposed to porn so young. I’m 22, younger generation. It messed with me

[@michaeloneill3797]

This is an incredible episode!

[@MangoPanic]

Something I will say is that the kid is 12 and is going to need access to the internet whether they like it or not. He'll need it for school, and he'll need it if he doesn't want to be left behind socially. Cutting it off completely isn't the way, you have to teach moderation. Which I understand is probably difficult for older parents like this, because they're not going to understand how to use content controls or set time limits or anything. Maybe reaching out to some younger parents to learn might be a good idea

[@blueStarKitt7924]

EXACTLY.

[@iandouglas4992]

Great episode.

[@zachbills8112]

Punishing and shaming your kid for natural self exploration is a fantastic way to create a complex about sex and to destroy his sense of connection with his family. By all means have frank discussions about moderation and fantasy vs. reality but there are serious dangers to overreacting that aren't being discussed here.

[@blueseptember2174]

P@rn is not realistic, and is full of violent acts. And leads to more perverse acting out. He is not wrong to set boundaries and redirect this kids to more worthwhile things.

[@brightspacebabe]

This could be a very bad situation because of what he is watching. There is some bad stuff on the web. This is not just girlie magazines.

[@nTrubl3]

Porn is trash mastrubation is okay but it leads to other things....I rather teach my son to put in work and have a lady for yourself

[@antonioiniguez1615]

Sexual exploration is for marriage only.

[@csx6910]

A lot of porn is rough and can teach him to be that way with women. And going through puberty? He'll likely become a predator.

[@adamschroeder5842]

Now this dude and his wife are the real fucking alphas.

[@DaniMcLovinIt]

This is such an awkward topic I think most parents just don’t know. What happens when kids hit puberty and experiment? How can they “learn themselves” in a safe and legal way or what do people tell their kids?

[@ThaBloodWitch]

I love that journal idea. As a teenager, having that line of communication to my mom would have been amazing, because some things are easier to say in text than in words.

[@robertaferri8300]

Great advice for all parents

[@christinapearson4287]

Here are my suggestions: 1. Keep the internet router in the bedroom and turn it off at night. 2. No I pad access for the 12 year old instead one family computer In the living room with limited access (internet blockers) 3. Keep your I pad, smart phone in your bedroom or in a drawer that is locked by key literally.

[@Birdman0169]

That's terrible advice

[@bilbobaggins4403]

We know that the trauma caused from age 1-7 are with you forever.

[@JackMason-oq8lf]

And what if seeing naked people exercising their freedoms isn't a trauma? What if it's like banana pudding?

[@bilbobaggins4403]

@JackMason-oq8lf if all you eat is banana pudding you're likely to become diabetic.

[@bilbobaggins4403]

@JackMason-oq8lf The trauma from age 1-7 wasn't caused by watching porn. You think people in porn are free? Most are high on drugs.

[@Panteradoublebass]

You truly are a model William!

[@bjaka220]

What a rockstar dad! So much to learn from this call for all of us!

[@2shy1151]

Im hoping he puts together that the boys behavior became negative when his biological father started coming around.

[@greggb681]

My sister and her husband were so strict on their kids that it backfired. It took them years to realize that letting your kids have a little space is okay and honestly healthy.

[@JeffHynes]

What a great call!

[@nancerella2000]

Wow. Such good advice.

[@Lyte_Drew]

As a 13 yr old this is way too common. Personally I avoid it because of my belief in god and I see other kids my age watching that crap even in school and it consumes their personality. It is way too easy for kids my age to watch porn and it honestly disgusts me.

[@AudreyW1997]

Good for you kid honestly. I wish I would have gone down that route however I did later in life.. You're on a good road keep it

[@austinallen1797]

it's actually the systems fault for allowing access to people under 18. The people who sanction it happening should all be put into prison for allowing access to minors

[@Carter-nl2]

Its impossible to completely firewall the internet or make sure that everyone that goes on to those websites are 18. They tried to make a fire wall in the CCP But it failed as it is very easy to get around. Even in my school they Have firewall witch can be circumvented by just using a different browser or a VPN. Nobody "sanctions it" The Internet will never be uncontrollable as there are to many people on there to monitor

[@theredtechnician]

I was 12 when I started, I wasn't even producing sperm yet, it definitely shaped me as an adult.

[@adcantu11]

I started at 9/10...As i continue listening, i definitely gave my grandparents a tough time...

[@AppleAdvocate-ff5om]

Big fan of Dr. John. But isn’t this thing of “you opted out” a form of weaponizing one’s connection? It may not be the intention, but the result is that the child gets less time with their family. Are we saying that kids have to earn time with their parents?

[@elenajewel3]

I understand what you’re saying and perhaps there’s a fine line with this, but I feel like the consequence is not losing normal interaction but “extra” interactions- fun interactions. His example was going fishing. If you don’t do your homework by the time we leave for fishing, we just can’t go fishing. We can go fishing in the future, but tonight we’ll just wait until you finish your homework and watch a movie or something rather than the fun thing we were going to do instead. You still eat dinner as a family, do your normal nightly routine, you’re still interacting as a family unit. They may choose to sit in their rooms instead because they’re disappointed. That’s okay too. You’re just holding them accountable.

[@bcjammer87]

You’re kidding right? If kids didn’t try looking at porn I’d be concerned.

[@ouwebrood497]

The caller sounds like Dennis Prager from PragerU LOL.

[@isssraelangel5856]

My brother is 13 and the ides of him watching porn is insane I don’t get how a 12 could be watching that 😭😭😭😭😭

[@Art_thecl0wn]

My daughter came home and told me a girl in her class watches prn at her home. There was another girl at the school who actually got in legal trouble for sending out illicit photos of herself. My daughter is 10….these are elementary school kids. Practically toddlers still. My daughter has requested to be taken out of public school, the kids are out of control. She will be doing virtual instead.

[@KaylaA4344]

@@Art_thecl0wnplease homeschool them because some of these kids at school come from broken homes and expose things to other kids.

[@Detsubkrod]

I did at 10. You get hard and start to figure things out.

[@Viracocha88]

you're clearly not a male.

[@momof1576]

Most do

[@Infinatefates]

Wow some amazing and great advice and I wish I had this as a kid❤

[@Ali-sm2wg]

Man it sounds like a prison in this household.. poor kid..

[@SeafishNeko]

I remember starting looking at risky stuff right when I got unsupervised access to the internet which was when i was 13 😂

[@kylerp8]

Man I can’t think of one boy from school growing up that didn’t 😂

[@XYtoTheDoubleG]

You will not stop your child at looking at porn

[@djlivvy46]

Even if you do control what is in your home, these kids are showing each other what is on their phones at school.

[@beckee6282]

That’s why homeschooling needs to be more common and accessible

[@djlivvy46]

@@beckee6282 - then men are going to have to start earning more money. No more 50/50.

[@nothanks8368]

Just creating a bunch of little socially inept weirdos ​@@beckee6282

[@garyaanderson214]

​@beckee6282 This is still coming at a later time.Home school can be a tool but this is coming in thier life at some point

[@djlivvy46]

@@garyaanderson214 - yes, even if you homeschool, they still have brothers, cousins, neighbours etc.

[@MrBurns0618]

The best approach for raising a child is to simply not introduce the electronics in the first place. Therefore the child won't know the difference between having them, and not. And no, keeping them away from the internet and electronics is not "isolating" them at all. Parents need to step up and parent, not go by what everyone else is doing. Your child doesn't need a phone and tablet at a young age just because that's what other parents are doing.

[@devdixit2440]

Depends on what ayoung age means. Your kid probably needs electronics by the time they're a teenager, a tablet or a laptop at least. And they need to understand how tech works, they need to learn to navigate social media at some point, because that's just a part of life now. We live in a digital world. A person who can't use technology at all, is nearly useless in the modern workplace.

[@Bringon-dw8dx]

At 12 you will need electronics for school

[@MrBurns0618]

@@Bringon-dw8dx They are supplied by the school

[@Bringon-dw8dx]

@@MrBurns0618 wow, you went to a fancy school. I’ve never heard of this?

[@MrBurns0618]

@@Bringon-dw8dx When did you last attend high school? A lot has changed even in the past 5-10 years, and most schools do supply base level Chromebook’s now. I graduated in 2019.

[@zoereid8104]

I wish my parents had done the journal thing with me… gracious, that hit me hard.

[@JuanRamónSilva-Piano]

All this talk would be unnecessary if our society had never left God. It seems to me that human beings got hold of something very tempting and they decide to give up on God to fulfill their desires. And even then, we are never satisfied!! What a cruel joke.

[@Chartlaub5]

It's like half of the comments here forgot they were 12-year- boys at one point . Everything about this call was normal and had a good response . Don't project your experiences from grown men addicted to porn with a kid that is seeking something that most boys do out of curiosity

[@alaska49girl]

The problem is the horrible stuff that is out there that they can see. And Instagram and Snap are mostly only used for Porn by kids now. It's the extremeness of what they are able to access that makes me so sad.

[@Chartlaub5]

@@alaska49girl agreed. The threshold for "normal porn" has been raised extremely

[@Bionicbunnywabbit]

You simply don't understand. All of us that started viewing porn at 12 got addicted. You're insane if you think otherwise. That kind of dopaminergic brain bath for grown men and their cave man brains is too much. Imagine a child. It screwed me up and a lot of my friends too and took years to finally quit.

[@JackMason-oq8lf]

How extreme have you found it to be? Can you give us an example?

[@JackMason-oq8lf]

@@Chartlaub5 It's true. Nowadays, one trend that has become very popular is called a "three-way," in which three different people take their clothe off in front of each other and proceed to get romantic. It's quite unusual to watch. Another big trend is for a group of people, or two, to get in a room and strip off their clothes and sit down and do what pre-pube boys do so well, when they can find an alone moment to practice. Except now, a bunch of people will practice in front of each other at the same time. It's pretty wild.

[@mauraboland6842]

Somatics therapy, they should go to a somatics therapist so they can work on their nervous systems

[@abdulazizabdulahi1187]

Damn I love these parents and how proactive they are...atleast he can escape the porn addiction hopefully

[@dukejaehrlich8900]

Don’t do anything it’s normal and he will eventually stop when he realizes it’s bad I would be scared if he didn’t

[@MattPryze]

As a kid growing up with no signs of intimacy between my parents, divorce, and having no experience, internet was the only place where it existed yet I was shamed for it. I’m grateful it was around

[@shaniquejoe5108]

Same

[@Dwights_trash_can]

porn is false intimacy... there is nothing healthy about believing thats what it really is.

[@shrimpsaresearoaches777]

Youre grateful you could watch p0rn as a minor? Yikes.

[@dewilew2137]

Pornography is not intimacy, it’s sexual exploitation.

[@blueseptember2174]

P@rn will ruin your life.

[@JLCarbajal]

I feel like he truly didn't want to be there for him he did it out because he felt obligated and something as simple as him want to know what sex is curious about sex was his way out

[@AndrewTank]

Great episode

[@Jp-ow6nm]

This podcast has giving so so so many valuable life tools that I could have never figured out on my own. Especially from someone who didn't have any parents

[@bilbobaggins4403]

It's self soothing behavior.

[@TruckerWife]

Yep. I tell my daughter that she can choose to do or not do something as a consequence. But I will always try to spend different time with her since she has severe attachmwnt issues.

[@trevor3575]

Literally every 12 year old watches porn. It’s crazy how outta touch older people are. I’m 25, when I was 12 in middle school, all anyone talked about was porn😂

[@chanasakcriska7488]

I don't think it's out of touch. I think parents are waking up to the reality that societally, relational, and personally porn is harmful and if they don't pay attention to what their children due on the internet, they could be exposed to a lot of junk that effects how their brains develop.

[@AlexSmith-xk8tz]

Just because it’s normalized doesn’t make it ok

[@FlyTour69]

And we see the effects of porn today with so many guys objectifying women and women no respecting their own bodies. It’s poison and has wreaked havoc on society.

[@trevor3575]

@@FlyTour69 I don’t believe porn did that as much as general society. Look at your username with the “69” in it. Everything is sexualized in society, it doesn’t even have to be about porn. There are a lot more factors like your environment growing up and mental illness that affects the response you’re talking about. Nonetheless, my comment was more surface level like they’re freaking out because a 12 year old was watching porn when the majority of pre teens-teens watch porn especially today with kids getting phones and iPads in elementary school

[@FlyTour69]

@@trevor3575 the 69 in my username was made long before I knew anything about THAT. It was supposed to be 96, because I was born in 1996, but I mistakenly had it switched and didn’t realize it until after the fact.

[@3amwater43]

If you don’t know what to do in this situation you should not be a parent.

[@blueStarKitt7924]

🤨

[@Bringon-dw8dx]

12 year old boys watch - Wether it’s on their device or through someone else’s. As a sexually actively adult who is Gen Z (just) I’ve seen the consequences of porn at a young age, and parents that didn’t make the effort to ensure their children understood the fantasy aspect of porn. Very violent sex is seen a minimum, what women are expected to do as ‘standard’ has dramatically changed when I’ve spoken to older aunts.

[@Miner_20]

And what if i understand that? Bc i think the pron isnt exactly my problem ive quit for 2 weeks i didnt get better, i still think woman irl look 10000 times better than these pron models, i think/hope im ok

[@Bringon-dw8dx]

@@Miner_20 it subconsciously warps you expectation and understanding of sex over years of exposure. Quitting for 2 weeks is good, but realistically quitting until you’ve gained enough real life sex experience to counteract the damage porn has done is ideal

[@Miner_20]

@@Bringon-dw8dx i understand

[@cutehumor]

set up adult filter on your wifi router. also, may want to consider turning off internet to only your device by IP address.

[@areyouseriousholmes]

Vpn easy to bipass

[@zone453]

@@IJoeAceJRI you'd be suprised

[@COINsimp2024]

@@IJoeAceJRI it's 2021.

[@unnamedchannel1237]

@@areyouseriousholmes decent router can block VPN, sounds like the dude needs to buy a fortigate and learn how to configure it.

[@wittyusername9544]

Unfortunately it’s all over social media as well. On twitter, instagram, Facebook etc. my advice would be to set up restrictions on the iPad so it can’t work from 8PM to 8AM.

[@habibstation1273]

That was me at 12 also, it stuffed up my life, i am still struggling with distorted sexual desires to this day

[@noahstaley5492]

As a younger person, I can say I was exposed and began watching it at 13. It was pretty normal at the time that just about every male in my middle school was. It was the summer after my 6th grade year.

[@greekyogurt5014]

Same in my middle school every one was watching it i was only introduced to it by someone 😂

[@celticcon92]

9:30 this is beautiful.

[@tinajernigan1728]

These people are being too hard on these kids. It could backfire if they continue to be so strict.

[@taos_diary_x]

Kids nowadays are coming across porn as young as 8. Please put restrictions on your children’s iPads. I’m a victim.

[@DoomMishima]

You cannot live without the internet in this era. Just put parental locks on websites with pornography. Video games are harmless.

[@dennisleporte2327]

Just explain that it's not real. Once he starts it's hard to close the door again.

[@bluetoast8584]

Cmon, don’t remove the internet from your house. That’s ridiculous frankly and the kid will really resent it and he will lose out if he cant access internet.

[@luminous6969]

Yeah he's just gonna jack off to other stuff. What difference does it make if he uses his imagination to fantasize about his classmates or uses actual imagery that you can see with your eyes?

[@sarcasm2960]

For real . When you are a teenager, your hormones are constantly spiking. Put him in sports to keep occupied.

[@everydaybodybuilding2282]

@@luminous6969 well arguably there is a difference. Some very strange and violent preferences can develop from the content of things online. Fantasizing about Stacy in the shower probably isn’t going to get him into hardcore stuff lol.

[@everydaybodybuilding2282]

@@erichmutchler3262 well put. Might not happen, but certainly there’s a higher chance

[@Theaddora]

Dont know why he's laughing. This is serious business.

[@bballjulien]

why?

[@Theaddora]

@@bballjulien you don't belong here.

[@bballjulien]

that's a great explanation of why a 12 year old watching porn is serious business. I can tell you're a very thoughtful and articulate person@@Theaddora

[@momof1576]

No it’s not. He’s a normal kid. He’s just curious.

[@MalesAreDemons]

@@momof1576That’s how men start objectifying women !!

[@poocyx]

i think its normal for kids to start whatching it at 12-13

[@maxhess3151]

Has no one thought of using a password?

[@divinealex2]

This is just sad:(

[@Demonoicgamer666]

Can you blame the kids for not trusting you? Their parents are addicts he likely didn’t have parents he could trust so you need to give them a reason to trust you

[@BlackStump172]

A Playboy is a bit different to online porn !

[@tcanniff]

I always want updates on how these families are going. God bless them and God bless Delony for sharing his experience and knowledge.

[@johnstown2451]

FYI If your kids have unfiltered access to the internet via their phone-they too are watching inappropriate videos. It’s everywhere. If I could grow a beard, I’d become Amish to protect my kids.

[@johnstown2451]

Chuck Missler helped saved my soul. 173880 proves when the Christ would come. Gen chapter 5 and Numbers chapter 2 will blow your mind!

[@racpatrice]

This is the reason why my Apostle told parents in our church not to buy smartphones for their children. I completely agree with him. Children should be protected and part of that is regulating their access to the internet. My child (if I have one) will get a dumbphone or a smartphone with parental controls and find my kid features on it

[@mowerds33]

Yup, don't trust the internet with your kids, even the "kids" apps can be highjacked by people with bad intentions.

[@kamarwashington]

@@johnstown2451 No one knows the time when Christ will return. Read your bible

[@johnstown2451]

@@kamarwashington You misunderstood my statement. Daniel 9- Gabriel gave Daniel an encrypted message on the exact number of days to when the Christ would present Himself. The amazing feature is that it’s a prophecy of a prophecy about a prophecy. Gabriel says when to start the metaphoric stopwatch. “That from the going forth of the commandment to restore and to build Jerusalem until the Messiah the prince”… Only God knows the future. I’m not talking about the second coming brother. You see this passage authenticates the plan set forth from the beginning of time. It also explains why Jesus kept miracles and His mission a secret-until the appointed time. “Mother, it’s not my hour” & Jesus talking to Peter “who do the people say I Am-tell no one” UNTIL one particular day. Jesus arranges Zachariah 9:9. I hope that makes sense. Please check out videos from Chuck Missler.

[@garretteveryday]

they should do absolutely nothing