Left My Kids for My New Husband (Can I Fix It?)

Left My Kids for My New Husband (Can I Fix It?)
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[@missyfrank880]

It really disgusts me that parents prioritize gaining a new partner over their existing children.

[@amydoran9987]

She’s obviously not happy with her bad choices.

[@fauxbro1983]

​@@amydoran9987so. Guilt is a bullshit excuse for inaction

[@henryanaya8459]

@@amydoran9987doesn’t sound like she was unhappy about her decisions, she seemed unhappy the way the new man is being. If he fixes his attitude she’d continue the same, happy woman but it’s the fact that the new guy is probably cheating and being distant that gots her messed up

[@BeautifulGood713]

Disgust is a very strong emotion. Did this happen in your family?

[@kagnewcobra5228]

It's what happens when you get "hot pants"!

[@katdavid8406]

Let’s fix that title: I Abandoned my children for my new husband and I refuse to take any accountability.

[@anyagee9467]

And I feel remorse only because my new husband isn't giving me what I want. Otherwise I'd continue to abandon my kids.

[@Losochill]

Ms. Kat you are one of a kind!!! 😂👏

[@user-dm9ii9fe7u]

100%

[@jackdeniston59]

The no accountability is a given for women. It is the cause of all problems in the world today. ALL problems.

[@coureenlawrence4915]

​@@anyagee9467You are so right with that assumption. He doesn't want her anymore.

[@terrilortie8109]

She only misses her kids because the long distance fairytale is over and she doesn’t like her husband

[@Bluehearte07]

Boom!

[@natashamwangi4890]

it feels like she left expecting support only for him to end up being the part time dad he was long distance. Only now she doesn't have 3 mommies helpers

[@user-cr6lc4bf9l]

Why would her new husband know that the children come first, when she, their mother didn't put them first. This is on her.

[@debbieparnell7582]

It's on them both. He's a garbage person too.

[@blister9366]

Because she never drew that line in the sand. From the moment she met hubby number two, they enabled each other's selfishness

[@bethammons1239]

Well said

[@DBSK4TY]

👏👏 Hear hear...

[@isabellaemmanuilidis0402]

she does NOT care about her kids. she only cares now because her risk didn’t pay off and now her husband doesn’t care about her as much and their relationship is struggling. this woman is a desperate loser

[@keara3041]

Unpopular opinion: You do not have to have kids with every new person you date/marry

[@jdstep97]

YES! Thank you, @keara3041, for being the one to say that. I don't get it. So many birth control options these days, and people are still irresponsible.

[@jet4415]

I thought that was a Southern thing. Apparently not.

[@greenAbbot]

How is that unpopular?

[@no_prisoners6474]

You don't have to keep dating after a failed relationship. Sex makes babies, so the baby issue lies inside a bigger issue.

[@KatieLHall-fy1hw]

@@jet4415it’s a human thing

[@mustangthings]

“I had to leave my older children with their dad” No you didn’t. Take some accountability.

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

I caught that too. I had to…and to mention day care and Covid to try to somehow use that to cover up the fact that she lusted after a man and left her own kids for him. Now that he’s not paying any attention to her … 🙄

[@onset5610]

Yep

[@kittenpawsbb]

Exactly. It’s all about fulfilling her emotional needs. Instead of doing what’s right. Me me me. Blame others.

[@PepeCoinMania]

thye wont

[@jackdeniston59]

Lets be real. She did them a favour. And the world, we know exactly who she is now. No redemption. This is why so many women fight so hard to keep kids, to hide the truth of who they are.

[@jimjam_games5783]

My dad met a new woman and within months she alienated him from his entire family, orchestrated a conflict, convinced him his children were the devil and we haven't spoken to him in over 15 years. I don't blame his toxic wife, I blame him. His choice.

[@MakeMoneyOnlinePorcupine]

My stepmom also tried to do this 😬

[@strategygalactic]

Do not underestimate the manipulative powers of a woman.

[@angiedues8813]

this is my family’s story too. both mom and dad moved on to new fsmilies

[@cmkristi]

Exactly. HIS choise!

[@brasshouse9822]

Don’t blame the woman. She isn’t your mother and owes you nothing. There is no woman in the world who could make me feel a certain way about my children. No woman would ever have that power over me. I feel like it’s easy to get mad at the woman and hard to blame your dad but the blame goes to your dad.

[@kottonkandyx]

As a child of a mother who abandoned me and my brother literally let us homeless without anyone to look after us. It is unforgivable

[@PepeCoinMania]

she did when you were 30 years old dude lol

[@jaciemokidm609]

That was wrong of her indeed, except this other woman didn't leave her kids homeless and without anyone.. She left them with their father, and definitely not homeless.

[@lisad56]

My mother was about to do the same. My sisters were 13 & 15 yrs old. Our mother decided she was leaving my sisters alone without any financial support. She was moving in with her boyfriend. Mother changed her mind because I told her she needed to help me with food. She didn’t want any responsibility. Unforgivable

[@grilledcheeseandsoup1652]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. You didn't deserve that. I hope you know it was your mother that had a huge problem and not you. It was not your fault she left. She was a horrible person.

[@Jendromeda]

guess what---you don't need her now and you never need to take care of her in the future. Enjoy your freedom and your life. PLEASE!!!

[@NeeNee_B.]

So the kids stepped up to take care of YOUR new baby, and you repay them by abandoning them?? Parents of the year 🙄

[@NeeNee_B.]

@@wordsalad01 I agree. All I heard was embarrassment and pity for herself.

[@katrinna7311]

I agree with you both. It seems like she tried to make it right by having them visit and FaceTime but she never mentioned being sad because she misses them or misses being there for them. Big difference

[@TacticalStrudel]

@@wordsalad01female solipsism.

[@jovitarich7078]

Apologize to your family ex and children and start fresh by living close to your kids and forget your wants and desires. Do the right thing. Trust Jesus and give your life to Jesus, He will take care of you but you deal with consequences. That’s what I am doing and God has blessed me with a home and job and the love of my 5 kids and cannot wait to retired so I can spend time with my grandchildren.

[@abigailloar956]

​@@jovitarich7078that is the best thing she could do. My mom won't do this, and she has tarnished all of her relationships that could mostly be repaired with an apology and evidence of change. It is just sad. Seems so simple but pride is heavy backpack full of gold that you just don't want to put down. Even if it kills you

[@GUITARTIME2024]

Two selfish people found each other. Shocking.

[@triplecheesemac]

but the selfish couples NEVER ever works out. How surprising.

[@nikstar1313]

Both acting out their unhealed childhood issues - it’s infuriating

[@tomstulc9143]

Two of a kind self-centered. . Science teaches, opposites attract and likes repel. I guess it's Dr fauci science time.

[@Jendromeda]

LOL exactly.

[@CyeOutsider]

I dumped my most recent romantic partner in part becuase he couldn't form a relationship with my 10 year old son and expressed negative feelings towards him. No romantic relationship is worth neglecting your child or placing them in a negative home situation. Nope. Get rid of them.

[@angelanordmeyer4730]

Wonderful of you. That was disaster averted.

[@PepeCoinMania]

nobody want to raise somebody else kids, you should be glad, dont expect second fathers to your kid

[@abark]

You got part of it right. The part you got wrong is no so called romantic partner of yours should have even met your son.

[@GardenerEarthGuy]

​@@abarkthis is what I was going to say! At ten a child needs stability... This lady is garbage.

[@kellijasper5912]

@@PepeCoinManiathen don’t date someone with children if you don’t want children. Only a foolish and/or selfish individual does that

[@GBU61]

I cheated on my husband, had a child with the other man and left my family for a man I am not happy with. Sounds like poetic justice to me.

[@ryna03]

But so unfair to her children. All three of them. 🥺 For her, yes. It is poetic justice.

[@samanthap.879]

Right. My heart shatters for that little 15.5-17 year old girl man.

[@duvessa2003]

I didn’t hear her say she cheated on her husband. With the selfishness, it’s easy to assume she did but we don’t really know.

[@marciabernard3820]

Never leave your kids for a man..that man will never respect you.

[@Dotthel]

The absolute truth!!

[@amberdeterman5815]

And neither will your kids

[@ethxo6734]

Neither will the internet. Shameful behavior.

[@michaelpalumbo4880]

Yup, and for men never leave your assets for a woman.

[@girlygirl1890]

@@ethxo6734 Great comment! I agree.

[@pirate254]

How are we only blaming the husband for "forcing her to choose between him and her kids" when she quite literally chose him over her kids??

[@lav7161]

Who said that?

[@terriesmith2616]

Exactly! 💯 She made the choice to leave her kids for her new husband. She wasn't forced. She made the choice to choose her new husband. She could've put her foot down and refused to leave her kids but she didn't.

[@MorganMaumell]

I think bc if he says that to the caller she will not receive anything else he says and he is trying to help her.

[@terriesmith2616]

@@MorganMaumell If that's the case, then how come Baloney has no problem holding men accountable when they leave their kids for a new wife? How come Baloney was able to say the truth to men but he's not able to say the truth to women?

[@rachelgooden9981]

@@MorganMaumellgood point. Goal is to help the person

[@javaskull88]

She threw away her family for some narcissistic jerk. And she’s still more focused on the jerk than on her children. This is tragic for everyone involved, her children most of all.

[@icculus19]

But her kids dont give her the same fee fees as her new man

[@tjkasgl]

She is the narcissist jerk.

[@user-jh4gj5ps2r]

@@icculus19wtf is a fee fee?

[@ginaem2008]

After my marriage of 15 years ended, my sons were my number 1 priority. I committed to never remarrying and under no circumstances would I have another child and start a new family. I never wanted my sons to ever feel like they’ve been replaced and to this day, no regrets about that decision.

[@em34ev3r]

good job ma'am.

[@AlisonGwynethBrown]

My ex left me for another woman l kept my kids with me l would never leave them l told my second husband of 29 years we come as a pair and we stuck to that.

[@rhyswhittington8759]

im sure your kids would be ok if you remarried later on in life when they are all grown up. dont take it off the table dude.

[@pinksugarcookies71]

I am so comfortable and happy that there was no other relationship in our family. Neither of us dated and kids and now grandkids were our only priority. No regrets

[@nicolen3146]

What’s sad is that if all was going well in her new marriage I doubt she’d even be thinking about her older children…smh

[@teenyverse7707]

💯💯💯

[@terriesmith2616]

Yup!! 💯💯

[@kaneykane3449]

Yip selfish woman

[@samanthajeffers9339]

I was thinking the same thing. Because its started with, ‘My husband and I don’t walk as much.’ It just came off as super selfish

[@AurumBlossom]

Facts she's only now regretting it

[@midnightblue117]

She left her children behind to now enter a cyber relationship… Absolutely pathetic….

[@rustyshackleford6637]

I don't understand what it is with these stupid bitches

[@10tepeyac]

I wouldn’t insult her but what she did was wrong

[@theworkingmanpodcast]

I think that’s a bit unfair. Why is it wrong for the dad to get the kids in the first place?

[@jaredweiman2987]

@@10tepeyac She’s stupid. And she’s a bad person that deserves to be ridiculed for the rest of her life for this.

[@pirate254]

Exactly. It's laughable how they condemn the husband for "forcing her to choose between him and her kids" when she's the one who chose him over her kids

[@DrewsThoughts]

John I'm legitimately confused. Why are you putting all the blame on the man and not the actual woman who did the abandoning?

[@Veracityseeker7]

He's off with this one. She's a narc.

[@joywebster2678]

I dunno. Her 2nd husband is a narc. She's not too bright emotionally, and may be selfish, but fell into the narcs love bombing big time. Bought his story of lies hook, line and sinker. Now faced with that reality she's seeing herself, and as Johm pointed out, she abandoned her 2 children for a fake dream, and the way out will hurt the 3rd child. She may not be a narc but she has no personal boundaries, or sense of commitment. What rubs us the wrong way is her idiotic hope " it can all be fixed". No Jeanette you screwed up 10 yrs ago with hubby 1, and then continued online dreaming, created another baby when you couldn't handle child care, working full time and managing 2 teens and the home. So fixes it by running away to a new state ripping the 3rd child away from siblings, to a narc daddy who has no time or interest. Good luck, you ducked up.

[@chinwenduchinwe586]

​@@Veracityseeker7 He's right on. That guy is the narc but she made a terrible terrible mistake. The narc guy sounds like he has her replacements on his hook already.

[@BlueDauntless]

Because it’s always the man’s fault.

[@rhyswhittington8759]

@@chinwenduchinwe586 not a chance. shes absolutely a narc. she saw nothing wrong with abandoning ship and following her feelings rather than give her kids what they need. disgusting behaviour and its a shame that shes a mother.

[@Seaflower722]

When I was a child my mom got serious with a man that lived in NY because of his business and wanted my mom to move there. At the time we lived in FL, and when my mom asked me what I thought of him. I told her I didn’t like him because he was cold and distant with me and he was very possessive over her. My mom realized it wouldn’t work out and ended it. She saw he never engaged with me so it wouldn’t work. Kinda of glad but I felt bad my mom wasn’t ever able to find her own person. Miss her so much but she always told me she had no regrets because I was the best thing that could’ve ever happened to her.

[@katfig8926]

A truly loving mother. It’s crazy how moms like yours are rare. Most deadbeat moms always pick sex over their own children.

[@rebeccaparker1982]

Please know that your mom followed her heart and it will always lead you to the right place . She sounds like someone you could be very proud of.

[@Isthisjoebiden]

​@@katfig8926Moms like his are not rare at all. What's wild is how often dudes shame single mothers and say, "the kid will always be more important than you" and then we're surprised this happens? Men don't like women and children

[@amberdeterman5815]

My mom left my dad and my brother and I when we were 2 and 4. She gave my dad full physical and legal custody. He was a older man with grown kids and she just decided to dip out. We saw her about 3 days a month all growing up. To say that our relationship is still distant is an understatement. Im 42 now and don't really care if I ever see her. Now that she's almost 70 and widowed she suddenly cares. She doesn't get why we are so close to our dad 🎉

[@GUITARTIME2024]

Personally, if it was me, I'd cut all contact. Unimaginable what she did. She'll try to minimize it, trust me.

[@Ad-Lo]

I’m sorry for the pain this must have caused you. But, I think you are better off than you would be had she been left to raise you with a pathology like that. Some women just aren’t maternal. Being a mum is more than just having babies.

[@marquisstrongchild7535]

While what she did was bad, remember that there is still room for forgiveness

[@jes6161]

@@marquisstrongchild7535 ONLY the OP can make the decision if there is room for forgiveness. Forgiveness is not always owed.

[@sueblack5794]

@@marquisstrongchild7535 Some people deserve the consequences of their choices. She made her choice, and now she is suffering those consequences of her choices. If the children are mentally and emotionally stable without her, that is more important for their now families.

[@Catelynmeow]

John: “it sounds like the thing you haven’t done through all of this is ask yourself, ‘what does Jeanette want and what does Jeanette need?’” I beg to differ - it sounds like it’s all she’s been doing.

[@michaelpalumbo4880]

Totally agree - you need your own show.

[@katiec6828]

You read my mind! The only person she cares about is herself!

[@terriesmith2616]

Bingo! 🎯🎯 All she does is think about her wants and her needs, certainly not her two older kids.

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

Exactly!! Who cares what Jeanette wants?

[@random-nz7dy]

It's times like that where John will really bother me. this woman clearly has only ever thought about what she wants. Come on John, be better than that.

[@trachbeba3488]

She isnt sorry about the children she abandoned. Just miserable cuz the new guy doesn't care about her anymore.

[@mrv2308]

Exactly. I would never forgive my mother.

[@dodomodo8334]

The comments appear to be focusing on a 20 and 17 year old left with their dad a year ago and dismiss the 5 year old having to live apart from their dad for 4 years...

[@mrv2308]

He could have moved to them. He just didn’t. His job was more important

[@fixie650]

EXACTLY. This lady made the real mistake years ago. There is no easy fix now and she probably didn’t see it coming back then.

[@pinkdiamondmindset]

I was thinking the exact same thing.. People are outraged like she left her 5 and 8 year olds. They were 16 and 20 at the time. 16 is old enough to make a sandwich, wash their own behinds and do their own homework, etc.. Don't kids start college and move out around 17 anyway?... And it sounds like they were living with her full-time before that and NOT with their dad, so why not spend a year or two with their dad at that age before they go off to college or get jobs.. As long as the dad is a decent person, where's the problem? How is it only moms get beat over the head as "abandoning their kids" If they don't live under the same roof, but for dads, it's not even a thought.. Seems like a lot of people are projecting their abandonment issues onto her. The Internet is full of miserable people..

[@miltoncat]

As my great-grandmother said… NEVER let anyone get between you and your children.

[@sueblack5794]

It is a massive red flag when someone you are dating is OK leaving their children, see them very little, or rarely see them if they have the choice. Their kids should be the priority.

[@williamdacosta9026]

Your grandmother was very wise, that is absolutely true. Your kids come first, they are your blood.

[@cur244]

The father of her kids should have. If that was the case they'd still be a family. Few women value family these days. Without priority of spouse first there is no family.

[@thomasspann8678]

I was raised with my father and mother in the home. All of us, brothers, sisters, cousins are very close. It is very hard for me to understand that family members actually intentionally hurt each other. I'm 70 years old. All I have ever known was family love. I actually thought all families were like mine. I see the turmoil in other families and I wonder did these families ever love each other.

[@denise4487]

Exactly NO MAN would ever come before my kids including their dad

[@laenakaralia693]

Janette's problem has always been 'what does Janette want, what does poor Janette need?' Janette does not care what havoc she wreaks, just as long as Janette is happy. She will keep in motion chasing her own selfish fantasies. Reprehensible

[@aelh123]

Yup ! Really felt like John dropped the ball on that one

[@ydoucare55]

Imagine abandoning your children and being happy.

[@meredithc4735]

Exactly. Let's keep Janette selfish and make her life the center of the world. Let's not hold her accountable for her horrible decisions and the pain she is causing her kids

[@Excitegaming0]

It’s natural, it’s called self preservation. Animals will eat their young if they are starving because self preservation. Obviously humans don’t do that but what is the point of existence if we are always unhappy?

[@DruinStLouis]

She got bamboozled by a narcissist. He’s now in the discard mode. End it now.

[@chinwenduchinwe586]

That's what is sounds like to me as well...

[@midnightblue117]

No! She bamboozled her own self...

[@emma2370]

Eh. She made her choice.

[@crymeariver221]

Thank you internet psychologist

[@CherryLipgloss1000]

I have always been a firm believer that marriage is first. Children are second. If your marriage is strong, stable, loving then everything else will follow suit. That being said, the safety and wellbeing of your children are always, ALWAYS the priority of the day. You don’t abandon them. You don’t abuse them. You don’t destroy their sense of self and safety. My god… who are these people?!

[@dogelincoln7167]

If your married your kids are second to the relationship...imo if mom and dad are unhappy the kids suffer

[@colincampbell9673]

I believe this only applies when the biological parents are married. She's created two separate broken homes for her children with two different men. She is clearly unfit to be a wife. She needs to be 100% dedicated to her children.

[@oncetwice5942]

This is the epitome of putting a man before your own children smh 🤦🏽‍♀️.

[@iPervy]

Putting herself if you ask me.

[@NeeNee_B.]

@@iPervy if she were putting herself first, she would've had more self esteem than to abandon herFaceTime and move to a new state for man she only knew over facetime. Her low self esteem is what made her choose that man over her kids

[@katyagrad3704]

Men leave wives and children for other women, and yet they don't get as much hate as mom's who give dad's primary custody when the marriage is broken

[@teresamagnusson]

​@@katyagrad3704Males are not the primary parent. They never have been and they never will be.

[@LuiggiChampan]

A lot of adults putting their own happiness over their children... very childish behavior.

[@kbere4142]

The fact this man was content to impregnate this woman and have her raise the kid herself until she moved to Chicago is all you need to know. But the way she was so cagey about dates, she likely cheated and got pregnant before she got divorced. The kids stepped up to help and then she figured it was hard to do two sets of kids alone. She’s already burned the first marriage so she rolled the dice on trying the new guy. This is very haphazard, emotionally driven, and reactive behavior. And why would she moved back to New York to take on more responsibility as a mother when every move she makes is for the purpose of getting more help from someone else? She either needs to suck it up and make it work with this new guy and cut her losses, or she will go looking for marriage #3. She’s looking out for HER first, make no mistake.

[@carolynmurphy3697]

And no other man will want her with two marriages under her belt and two sets of kids. Too much baggage

[@Bubbles-qh7ez]

This was what I was looking for. The fact that she raises the child alone before moving. He never prioritized her

[@racheljames7]

Yep. They both suck.

[@kconnor2371]

Her thrill, her happiness, her satisfaction, her benefit, her clearing of conscience. Exactly. She is a her first even above her children that’s exactly what a parent is not.

[@donnasalerno9870]

You nailed it! Selfish woman.

[@jorgearellano2983]

My mom left my house when I was 15 with the guy she cheated on my Dad with. I’m one of 4 kids. It was extremely difficult man… I’m 29 now and I talk to my mom now, but it’s been a long road of reconciliation…. I feel so bad for any other kids that have to go through this. God please help them

[@sportsman4545]

Reconciliation is never complete. It's always a fact. Your mother left you. I'm 64, mother left at 15. We all 4 were affected.

[@javaskull88]

I’m always blown away by how perceptive Dr. Daloney is. He’s so good at quickly sniffing out the real story.

[@annfarrell348]

It sounds like many of us think he missed the real story in telling a narcissist when her decisions were selfish that she needs to think of herself. That's all she's done.

[@Veracityseeker7]

​@@annfarrell348Exactly.

[@onebeyutiful]

@@annfarrell348I was thinking the same thing. Super selfish! He didn’t even mention mending the relationship with her older children.

[@JudePi-jx7yo]

They get the background from staff in advance so it's more moving it along rather than perceptive.

[@cyn5962]

The word "narcissist" seems to be the psychological buzzword de jour. This is an overused clinical term.​@@annfarrell348

[@l-train7876]

So sad for her kids. They will always remember mom leaving them for another guy who’s not their dad.

[@neleven4154]

With their 5 yr old sister

[@abrandnewday3581]

Pretty sure the idea that her hubby has been entertaining another female, didn’t even enter her brain until just now. Like their love is just too special for that right 😂

[@Cooniez]

I was thinking the new hubby has been cheating, too, based on how she described his disconnected behavior and how he is always on his phone. Sigh.

[@sanitary103]

This lady is not the beacon of reasoning to put it bluntly.

[@chitlinjuice]

Birds of a feather flock together. She forgot that she's a cheater herself so obviously she would attract another man just like her with the same value system (or lack thereof).

[@amandabrittenden]

As someone who's mum who skipped town and left her children to live with their cheating father and his AP, so she could snag herself a new man.... the damage is done. Unless you apologize to your children profusely, which my mum never did, expect them to be salty. A marriage breakup affects the kids too, not just the selfish ass parents. My mum still has no idea what she did to me. I was in my last year of school and I had to drop out. My sister was 13. My brother went on a self-destructive rampage. She abandoned us when we needed her the most and has never acknowledged it. Apparently we're just supposed to get over it

[@kconnor2371]

I’m sorry for you and your siblings. They just get over it. It was a long time ago as a perfect example of a toxic person that will never change and this often recommended by therapist to cut out over your close circle.

[@chrismifflin3862]

Please validate me Dr. John. I don't want to take responsibility for my lousy decisions.

[@jackieyoung3359]

So the wife abandoned her older children for a man and the husband refused to move to the state that his significant other and baby lived?!?!? These two deserve each other. Poor kids will suffer the consequences.

[@badmontingz1219]

I think u missed the part when she said she could transfer her job but he couldn't and would lose his yrs towards his pension.

[@rebeccashields9626]

@@badmontingz1219ah yes, you’re right, abandoning your children is totally worth someone else’s pension. How did we all not see that? Someone else’s pension is clearly more important than caring for her children!

[@cuttinol]

@@rebeccashields9626 Letting the father have physical custody of a 16 year old whom you visit with as much as possible and talk to daily is not the same as "abandoning". Is there a problem with the father having physical custody of his child?

[@Mar-op2sd]

​@@cuttinolwrong!

[@cuttinol]

@@Mar-op2sd It's wrong of a father to have physical custody of his child?

[@mwhe3111]

This woman has made so many bad decisions and seems clueless about ramifications. I'm sorry, I'm siding with those kids every single time.

[@deniseball7764]

Not clueless just won't accept responsibility for her actions

[@warewellnessco]

He’s going to leave her. You can tell in her voice. Just like he said HE DOESN’T CARE. The damage she’s caused her kids. Irreparable. SMH. She’s selfish af.

[@Ryan-wj7yq]

Single father here. Those kids are better off without you ma’am. You abandoned them. Your presence is no longer needed. It is in the best interest of the kids to never see you again. Period.

[@mimi8352]

Best comment!

[@paulacastro5128]

The way she framed the call was to mask her selfishness ‘I had to leave me older children’ ummmm no you left your kids for a guy and then relied on older kids to watch her youngest 🤦🏾‍♀️. I respect Dr John but sometimes it seems like he overlooks selfish/narcissistic behaviors from women.

[@kw3113]

I always thought he was just keeping dialogue open by doing that. But near the end of this call he nailed her with ‘he’s talking to others.’ Spot on!! Not knowing him I’d say he has done this to his two ex wives. I wonder how many kids he has with previous wives, she didn’t mention that.

[@alluringbliss4165]

I agree with you, John should have held her accountable for her choice to leave her 2 older kids.

[@Ad-Lo]

@@alluringbliss4165 why? They were with their father. My husband brought all three of his kids to be with me. I don’t blame their mother. She’s insane. I was relieved. Difficult as it was, I think they should be with the parent who is mature enough to take care of them. It took two people to make them, one of those two people is raising them. Why does it have to be the female one? Before me my husband did an amazing, excellent, superb job as a single dad with full, sole custody.

[@alluringbliss4165]

@@Ad-Lo This woman isn't insane and I don't think she is unfit. Now, she realizes she made the wrong choice and she must take responsibility for her decision otherwise, she'll keep hurting the older ones.

[@SummaGirl1347]

It's the Lizzy Borden defense. Many men are unwilling or unable to accept that women are capable of being just as evil as men are; and are likely, like Dr. Delony, to believe that women's bad behaviors are due to the evil influence of the men in their lives. Lizzy got off because "women don't commit crimes this terrible". Many women are excused of their antisocial behaviors from the same mindset.

[@iPervy]

Dont know about this lady, but the actual dad of her kids is likely a real winner. He atleast choose his kids rather than running off.

[@Isthisjoebiden]

Single dad abandoned by other parent: winner Single mother abandoned by other parent: no discernment, should have chosen better, worst thing in society

[@truthbetold6942]

Oh, I get it now. She was perfectly ok with the situation, until he started ignoring her. Now, it is convenient for her to pretend to have a conscience about abandoning her kids.

[@Veracityseeker7]

Narcs gonna narc.

[@allthingsnu4673]

People need to learn to be happy single more often. The havoc that some people wreak on themselves and their children for the sake of finding a new relationship makes no sense.

[@katrinna7311]

2 sets of kids now 2 broken homes.

[@TisHotMessHistory]

Wow. She sounds really selfish. It also sounds like the new husband is cheating, since she started her relationship with him on her phone and now she's saying that he's spending most of his time at home on the phone. They were having fun and now the thrill is gone. I feel sorry for all of the kids.

[@hotmess9640]

Omg hey girl!! I love your channel

[@TisHotMessHistory]

@@hotmess9640 hi! Thank you! ❤️ You know I love your name. 😆

[@lilylittlemonster5]

Great channel.

[@Myr25636]

She dumped her kids for the guy she was screwing for years. My ex did the same thing and my youngest son has never forgiven him. He didn’t invite him to his wedding, doesn’t go see him when he comes into town. She threw it all away for the jerk she was having the affair with and it’s blown up in her face. It turned out the selfish ass hole she left her husband for IS a selfish ass hole. Imagine that??? He will let them go without a shrug. He obviously doesn’t care one bit about her or the kids.

[@GabrielMartinez-sd8pc]

Once you cheat and leave, how the other spouse was is irrelevant. Stop husband blaming. Stop wife blaming. If a wife cheats, it’s HER fault and she is 100% accountable. Vice versa. Leave the spouses out of it.

[@unknowncomment85]

how dare you.. if man cheats it is his fault, if woman cheats, it is his fault.. 😂

[@mithrixx]

How did you know she cheated? Did I miss something?

[@dabd8175]

@@mithrixx yes, probably the last few grades of high school 😂

[@louisharper5238]

@@dabd8175this just popped up 😂… play nice

[@priscillagrrr4405]

I don't think she cheated, it sounded like the first marriage was already over when she met this online husband.

[@redcomic619]

Wow my mom could’ve made this exact call 20 years ago. Same circumstances, even similar locations. Let me just say, it does not end well. Her children will grow up resentful, cold and distant. Both parties will live with regret. She needs to move back to New York and fix this before it’s too late.

[@kagnewcobra5228]

It's already way too late! How is she going to "fix" this? It ain't happening !

[@lavenderkisses9461]

I agree-all she can do is face what’s the best decision now and show her kids she will do anything and everything to rectify the situation.

[@anndeecosita3586]

She can’t move back to NY and take her younger daughter unless her husband agrees to it.

[@susanburrows810]

She chose badly & selfishly -- to start life anew without her kids who need her & for whom she is responsible. She should admit this to her children, if she is a mother at heart, ask for forgiveness & do her best to repair a horrible situation of her doing. A REAL MOTHER does her best by her kids & admits when she's harmed them. Praying she'll have the courage & humility to support HER CHILDREN, & put herself in their shoes. That's maturity and love and honorable.❤

[@Puuws]

she just has shown she is way too codependent and selfish, maybe she loves them as well but not so much that she would chose to keep them in her life no matter what. There is nothing to fix really, the truth is just out, all she can do is be honest

[@jennbed1899]

HAD to leave her children? A mother should never leave her children. Love it that Dr Delony busted her bubble to tell her the truth. Was this man worth it?

[@yasminogbu8929]

❤️ so true

[@RyanABC123]

I can’t believe people this selfish exist. Imagine at 15 your mom says, bye I’m leaving. She also blames her new husband for all of this, and seems to take zero responsibility. Too many of these calls the blame gets put on the person who’s NOT on the phone and able to defend themselves.

[@Em-im1yz]

My mum was going to leave us run off to spain with her affair partner

[@sportsman4545]

Happened to me. The ramifications are for a lifetime. I'm 64.

[@flipdiva0007]

​@@sportsman4545me too. I'm 68. It's pretty much ruined my life.

[@bjkarana]

This is a similar situation to how my mother acted when my parents split when I was 12; she rushed out into dating, married, has another son, divorced _again_ and now cycles through 2-3 guys a year. In my teens and early 20s, her behavior didn't really phase me, but once I married and started a family of my own, wow did I have a LOT of feelings reflecting on how selfish my mother's behavior has been, and I've had some very tough talks with her over the past few years. I'm not sure the gap can ever be repaired, and I say that as a warning to this caller. Sometimes you have to repay your debts in a currency different from what you originally took.

[@prihaps]

Wow poetic. Condolences for your experiences in childhood. It’s bittersweet in a sense bc I believe it makes us amazing mothers yk.

[@yasminogbu8929]

Same, I was 12 too.. I’m 34 & I can’t believe it still hurts.

[@yasminogbu8929]

❤️

[@jordanburgau]

This breaks my heart. My husband has 3 children from a previous relationship. We are now having our 3rd child together/6th child of the family. I moved my life and adapted into his life 14 years ago to be apart of THEIR world. My stepkids and family have been our #1 always. And we have a great relationship with our kids. I can't imagine asking him to c hoose ever and he would have walked me to the door in a minute if I ever had ever done that. But I love them as much as my biological children.

[@gbb82]

Why do people judge me for never been married when nightmares like this happens.

[@Veracityseeker7]

Great question! When you get the answer, holler at me😅. Seriously, it's like people resent us for wanting to avoid the drama.

[@jongault7527]

Judging is when you force your opinion on another. The word you're looking for is just plain "opinion." Everyone is entitled to their opinion. They just can't act on it.

[@Jessica_lleigh]

What confuses me about this show is why people frivolously bring human beings into the world as if it's a selfish game.

[@iStorm-my5fp]

Having children does not change them into being non selfish

[@yusufraage8554]

Most women use sex and kids to trap the men they want and it almost never works.

[@anabolic123]

Woman leaving their children for men. And when the honeymoon dies off and it’s not what it use to be. All of sudden they feel guilty they abandoned children. No, your just depressed you feel alone

[@hybridous]

all deserved

[@datapatch7381]

Manchild you mean

[@aelh123]

10:51 WHAAAT ?! JANET had DEFINITELY BEEN GETTING WHAT SHE WANTS . she wanted a new husband ? ✅Got it, got an amazing job ✅ got a new baby ✅ had help from her older children to care for the baby ✅ went away and abandoned her older children to start a new life with her online husband ✅ taking her older children little sister to another state after making them bond ✅ *stop thinking about your self JANET! Start thinking about your children*

[@elisamonast9730]

No man and no woman is worth leaving your children behind. Children are a gift. We all can find a significant other basically around the corner, but children? Priorities were not aligned!

[@Puuws]

but not all people feel the same way. Its a good thing having kids is becomming less off a no-brainer

[@chyrellemorris6924]

I don’t understand how people don’t realize online relationships are fantasy once you meet in person it will be very different. This women ruined two families.

[@Yenya787]

I don’t feel an ounce of sympathy for this “mother”. She put a man ahead of her own children. Of course things aren’t the same. That man was living his best life living as a single man in one city while his married lover was raising their love child in another city. Her poor older daughters expected to serve as free childcare. Mothers who abandon their children for men are pathetic. Those children don’t owe the mom anything. She’s shaped their lives with her actions. They’re fortunate their dad stepped up to take them in after she chased this new cyber lover. Now she needs to deal with the consequences.

[@onset5610]

My mum did that to me at 12 & my brother at 16. She didn’t feel she abandoned us. . It effected our relationship. It’s really sad. I’m 33 now & I look back I think my mum must of been pretty detached from us maybe even desperate, she always tells me she loves me but I struggle to believe it. I focus on staying positive- I guess things could of been much worse

[@belle9184]

Could have, must have

[@kroenkeout708]

I can't speak for females. I can only speak for myself. Ladies, if you do this. Just know your son will never ever look at you the same way. The feeling of betrayal is so great it's hard to ever overcome it. This is a perfect example of how to basically get silently disowned by your own kids.

[@Wrestling4404]

Bingo. I don't think I'll ever be able to look at my mother the same, she can pretend it didn't happen all she wants, but as long as I'm alive I'll always be there to remind her of her lack of accountability.

[@kw3113]

She left her kids from first marriage moved out of state to raise a new baby with her current husband. Many years ago, many, Dr Laura said when you are a mom you finish raising your kids before developing a new relationship. This woman didn’t and now has kids who feel abandoned. So now her current marriage is in trouble and if it ends then that child will be separated from either mom or dad.

[@devadii24]

People always thought Dr Laura was too extreme with this idea but it makes total sense…. look at society now that people change partners like underwear 😅

[@ScurvyRascal]

That's the way i did it and still am. 14 years single. My daughter is 17. No boyfriends, hook ups or online bs!

[@kimberlysmith7625]

Absolutely. Until the youngest child turns eighteen the primary focus and responsibility is to your children and their needs, not yours. Dr. Laura still dispenses that advice today. I love it when she takes parents to task on this issue. She doesn't mess around!

[@thatbemefool]

HOLY MOLY….I thought the same thing. Long time listener of Dr. L and I still listen to her every single day. Her stance has NOT CHANGED. I’m thrilled I found this comment!

[@sueblack5794]

Men should do the same but they don't. Society doesn't tell them to stay single until the kids are grown. Men and women both need to be very hesitant reentering marriage after a divorce especially when you have kids. You sure as hell don't move to another state, even if they are teenagers.

[@blueseptember2174]

Ive learned never have more children than youre willing to take care of by yourself(they might leave you or they might pass away but you will still be the responsible party). We gotta step up in our commitment of love to our children ❤. Not always easy due to life circumstances but when you look back in life you wont regret it.

[@special_k-hvac]

That's not a bad rule of thumb actually

[@lynnreeves7748]

That is SO important!! You never know what another person might do. Example..woman meets man, they marry, he wants several kids. Wife has multiple kids and becomes a stay at home mom. Ten years later he leaves her for younger woman with no baggage. Now his soon to be ex wife has lost work skills, no 401k, etc. She's left to struggle raising kids by herself. Couldn't be me..that's why I only had 1 child. I knew that I could handle raising 1 child by myself and that's exactly what happened

[@cyn5962]

This is why I never had kids. I realized having kids is a huge responsibility. Once you have kids, you've signed up to take care of them for 18 years. You can't cast them aside when they become inconvenient.

[@yusufraage8554]

@@cyn5962 Its a good thing that selfish people dont have kids and I applaud you for knowing yourself.

[@emilyprovance7413]

This guy now knows that she will choose him over her children. He has the power, and knows damn well shes not going anywhere. So why even try.

[@playfair6468]

I don’t understand how mom’s walk away from their kids! I would go through hell for my 4 kids! My husband and I have been married 30 years. My husband and I love our kids! We love each other and we are best friends!

[@elyse443]

This is a terrible person. Period. What’s incredible is how a mother could possibly do this. If her older children don’t talk to her at all, good for them. As Dr Laura says, she “tore up her mother card”.

[@Redservasian]

Love Dr. Laura, more women need to listen to her wisdom

[@dcg590]

Exactly. John trying to pin this on a man who never said he’d leave his job is bs. She is a POS. She left her kids for this guy. This is her fault. Period. I hope her kids who even helped her when she got knocked up, cut contact. John is way off the mark here. I wish she could talk to Kevin Samuels. He would tell it like it is. SHE is at fault, SHE picked him. SHE destroyed her home. SHE ruined her own family and the lives of her kids. John, YOURE WRONG. Throw accountability right where it belongs. ON HER

[@terriesmith2616]

@@dcg590 John the Simp Baloney rarely holds women accountable for their choices in life.

[@ND-nx1nt]

Who is Dr Laura that you referred to? I would like to watch her content.

[@V.E.R.O.]

​@@ND-nx1ntDr. Laura Schlessinger, she had a radio show I used to listen to during my commute to work.

[@windingtrailsfarm6918]

Thank you John for saying that kids come first before new husbands. I think there are many who say the marriage comes first.

[@Ad-Lo]

The marriage does come first. You don’t need to retraumatise the children by exposing them to yet another failed marriage because you were neglectful and focused on children who shouldn’t be running any family as it is. The marriage coming first doesn’t mean the children don’t feature at all (as is the case here where they are blatantly used when not being ignored, abandoned and neglected). But the marriage comes first, no matter what number marriage it is.

[@michaelpalumbo4880]

Kids do come first, which is why I would never wife up a woman with children, unless they were grown and out of the house. If I am going to sign the marriage contract with a woman, she will be first to me, and I have to be first to her. Why would I want to put myself in a position where I promise to love, provide, and support a woman and intentionally make myself her last priority behind the kids, her X and X in-laws, the school projects, and everything else she has going on. I wouldn't even allow her to get a dog because they are time, energy, and affection vampires. That's how much I must come first. A cat - okay - but no dog!

[@alluringbliss4165]

@@michaelpalumbo4880 Dogs are better than you, dude!!!!

[@michaelpalumbo4880]

@@Austenfan177 If I don't come first, and her kids won't care about me, why would I put myself in that position.

[@michaelpalumbo4880]

@@Austenfan177 It's not shameful to want to be the top priority to your partner, but I couldn't agree more to not wife up single mommies because they never make a spouse a top priority.

[@katfig8926]

NEVER EVER would I forgive my mother if she ever chose a man over me growing up. She deserves the destroyed relationship with her children. They deserve better and I’m glad they have at least one parent who truly loves them. Disgusts me to my core any woman who picks 🍆 over their kids. Deserves all the heartache.

[@pamelaliegh]

No. Child abandonment can not be ‘fixed’ you will never ever have that child’s trust again.

[@YaYa-ke1zr]

She made a bad choice in a 2nd husband. That’s the bottom line. Now she has many regrets based on the consequences of her bad choice. She prioritized the wrong part of her life. Now what.

[@Allybaba55]

She's not sorry. She started off the call acting a fool and sounding narcissistic.

[@Veracityseeker7]

She definitely is.

[@user-vf3fz7qv6v]

I wonder if she’d be worried about fixing it if her marriage went well. My mom didn’t move states but she got remarried she stopped talking to me or spending time with me and would even yell at me so I would go away so she could be alone with her new husband. It wasn’t until almost 10 years later when I was 23 and moved out that when she started having problems she came running crying to me and even wanted to live with me - at the time my mom made twice as much money as me and could get her own damn place but nope I had to clean up her mess

[@imout671]

I know a few men whose mother abandoned them. They have all had substance abuse issues, DUI, jail etc...they are bitter as heck and hate their moms to the bone. Congratulations lady you just wrecked your kids forever

[@julitakamaki4386]

The sense of betrayal and abandonment will never go away for your children. There is a window to apologize and repair some sort of relationship but it will never be what it should have been. Eventually that window closes and it’s too late. Children are not compelled to love you unconditionally. You might not deserve their love in the end.

[@Pink_Princessx69]

he left you long distance for 7 years.... girl he dont want you

[@sueblack5794]

I imagine she is now having regrets because the 2nd marriage is falling apart. Bet she didn't have those regrets when he wasn't so bored and it was working.

[@abubarrie88]

So this grown woman thought it would be smart plan to marry someone when their entire relationship began and was only long distance? You met his representative not the person who he was his. And then married him and it was still long distance and had a baby still long distance. How did you see or he see this working? You let your two kids help raise your new daughter and left them to be with him cuz it’s unfair he’s a part time parent. He made himself a parti time parent he could have fixed that. Instead you left your kids to make him happy now you regret your choice because the reality of how he is sucks. Apologize to your kids but realize an apology will never undo what u did by leaving them and they’ll always have that living with them. You made certain choice and to you what you thought you were gaining seemed better than what you left behind that’s how kids feel when a parent leaves the behind to move on with a new family.

[@s_gal9900]

Representative do you watch Tony gaskins too?🤣🤣❤️

[@abubarrie88]

@@s_gal9900 not sure who that is lol

[@wrathfang]

so she is more worried about the husband than the kids.

[@mandiestewart9261]

It's called KARMA!! You leave your children you can't expect your life to turn into a bed of roses. You reap what you sow

[@FantazomiXroma]

If I’m with a person who doesn’t understand that my kids are number 1, I wouldn’t be with that person. On the other hand, being childless myself, if I’m with someone who would abandon their kids, I would question the relationship. I would be concerned about them.

[@PepeCoinMania]

thats why nobody wants to be a step father

[@JeanMarie16]

Sounds like her new husband hasn't compromised anything for this relationship to work. All the compromise has to be done by her, at the expense of her children.

[@triplecheesemac]

and her ex Husband. I hope the ex husband met a better woman than this trash.

[@badmontingz1219]

So he's suppose to lose his pension credits and everything he worked for to live to another state for kids that aren't his? I don't want to justify anything from afar but why does he have to throw his work career away when she can transfer? These two clearly aren't the most thoughtful people

[@kenlang2154]

Yeah, she's a terrible and selfish mother

[@peach_gurl]

It took 20 years to forgive my mother for doing this and my brother still doesn’t talk to her. There are consequences.

[@dagmar9019]

Divorce creates more problems than being married did sometimes.

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

Does anyone else think that she cheated on her first husband with her second husband way before she got with her second husband. Because let's be real here the woman has a 21 year old and a seventeen-year-old which means she's been with her second husband probably a good 10 years and two of those years were during while she was married to her first husband. she checked out her marriage abandon her children her children took it off the chin she had to do over baby they helped raise the child as she brought into the world and now she's starting to realize her children are going to cut her off and her second husband is on the verge of checking out the marriage. Her life is in complete shambles. This is a woman who either needs to move back to New York and try to make things right with her or be prepared to have a third child to have abandonment issues and possibly be blamed for her life choices

[@aprilchow-chee5281]

​@wordsalad01 exactly no responsibility for what she did she didn't had to leave her kids she chose to

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

I mean think about it her kids the 21 seventeen-year-olds basically from aged 16 and 12 have helped her raise her five-year-old. Which is her do over baby. And she wonders why the oldest is not talkin to her and it's a twenty-one-year-old pretty much doesn't want anything to do with her. She chose a man who she fell in love with over the Internet over her children. And now that's a man is beginning to check out on the marriage and she's afraid because she doesn't want to go back to her children and have them not speak to her and she doesn't want to be a single mom. Her marriage is over but now she's going to have to fight for that five-year-old and let's be real here the two older kids definitely have major and she doesn't even know it yet.

[@tech4uro]

At the end of the day she made her decision, now be a grown up and deal with it. No matter what she does its going to hurt. If she stays he won't change and if she leaves he can fight it to keep their new child in the same state- so either she will stay or give him custody and leave without the child. It is going to hurt, her fault. Just because you make a decision doesn't mean you always get to feel good about it. Welcome to being a responsible adult.

[@teenyverse7707]

Exactly!! She wants to feel good about what she did that was all bad. LOL!!

[@terriesmith2616]

Bingo! 🎯🎯🎯 She made the decision to leave her kids for a new husband and now that her 2nd marriage is on the rocks, she regrets it. If her 2nd marriage was going well, she wouldn't even give her older kids a second thought.

[@iStorm-my5fp]

She talked more about the new husband then her kids she abandoned

[@AndreDMalan1966]

My oldest sister found a new husband when her sons were 9 and 11. Her new husband hated her sons and she "dealt" with it by telling them that they could "choose" between living with her and their biological father, who was on his 4th wife. They "chose" to live with their father and she then felt exonerated from any responsibility for her children. I CANNOT understand why women choose men over their children. Those red flags were "pesky" because they didn't suit her wants at the moment.

[@Hope-Truth-Light]

How are things between them now?

[@AndreDMalan1966]

@@Hope-Truth-Light Her children are 40 and 42 now and collectively take care of her. They are on good terms but it's more like a friendship than a mother/son situation.

[@theworkingmanpodcast]

There’s nothing wrong with her giving her kids to the father. What it is is that she’s feeling regret because her relationship is unraveling and she’s facing reality. I can understand that

[@user-wq7hw2ow9l]

I agree that it's okay for the father to get custody. However it is not okay for the mom to move across the country. As parents if you have to sacrifice a relationship or a job, so be it.

[@preciousgemini3578]

I agree w what you've said. The kids she left to her ex are not under 12. They are 17 and 21 and have a relationship w their father. Her little one deserved the same opportunity... only time will tell what the future holds for her current marriage.

[@PepeCoinMania]

its all wrong are you stupid

[@lisad56]

Her 17 year old still needs her. Moving to another state is wrong. She should have waited until her 17 year old was a little older.

[@BlueDauntless]

@@lisad56But she didn’t. And her 5 year old also deserves to be with her dad.

[@9liveslisa]

The correct answer is "You can't fix this." You blew a family completely out of the water because of your selfishness. The damage is done and it will carry throughout your children's lives in many ways. At best they will maybe be able to accept what happened, but they really won't be able to forgive you. Jeanette is looking for answers, but what she really needs to do is grow up and put her children first. Get control over your sexual hormones and grow up. You have to walk the walk that you created.

[@jemmysmith8661]

she deserves all of this she's a bad person

[@frecklydharma]

It is correct, "he understands, he doesn't care." The truth. Also, being married twice is not a "little red flag."

[@Lincolnsdaddy762]

It will never be fixed. The thought that one of your parents would abandon you for someone else would never go away.

[@sglacf]

Horrible advice: "ask yourself what do i want" seriously? That ls exactly what she did: whatever she wanted and ended up in a pickle

[@aelh123]

@@Austenfan177dang your comment is spot on

[@dogelincoln7167]

Between 2 pickles...lol

[@loganjackson675]

John doesn’t hold women accountable for their own actions. Of course she was manipulated by a narcissistic cheater, it couldn’t have possibly been the result of her own wants. Let’s be real, if her relationship in Chicago was going perfectly, she wouldn’t be concerned with her kids in NY. She’s only feeling guilty now that she’s unhappy with her current husband

[@emilyk.5664]

A good partner would have moved to be with his pregnant wife so she could remain near her children.

[@truthbetold6942]

It is ok to be upset at a toxic situation or person even if it is your parent. It doesn’t mean you don’t love them. It means you love yourself enough to know how unfair and painful it is . . . Trust me, if you try to bury it or make excuses for it, it will come back to harm you more especially later in life.

[@BlueDauntless]

Maybe he couldn’t find a job in this economy in NY like he had in Chicago. It took my husband too damn long to get his current job that has amazing benefits, moving isn’t worth it.

[@yusufraage8554]

@@BlueDauntless Nope, he used her and now he is finished with her. She used her ex husband and now the ex is better off.

[@truthbetold6942]

Some things are unforgivable. Trading your kids for a Chad is one of them.

[@davidw.5185]

When you make your life a slave to your passions and "happiness," one may discover another unhappiness and then another etc. Following the desires of the flesh is living like a drug addict. You are constantly looking for the next fix. Your "happiness" becomes a tyranny.

[@hybridous]

well said & only delusional people think that others should also be a slave to such a tyranny

[@CarolinaJanetIbarraMtz]

When you are a mother, priorities change, the priority is to raise your children, take care of them, protect them, educate them, guide them and prepare them so that they know how to face life...make them good men and/or women, when you finish your work as a mother, then you can think about your needs as a woman...

[@franniepan]

My mum moved my brother and me across the country when I was around 11 in order to be with a man. He was sleazy and didn't care about us kids and I couldn't understand what she saw in him. They lasted 9 months, after that my mum moved us back to our home town. As an adult I had asked her once why she did that (that wasn't a one off) and she said she wanted us to have a dad. I never wanted a dad, I wanted for my mum to be happy and I knew she wasn't happy with any of those clowns.

[@YahwehisGodandYeshuaisKingiamr]

She didn't have to leave her kids behind and she knows it. If something every happened between me and my husband and a man tries to tell me to choose between him and my kids I'm choosing my kids. Better to be single and be a good mother than to be selfish for self fulfillment and pleasure.

[@ingridbergman-vz7go]

Being soft on women and not holding them to account, is not only a JD attitude. It's the Ramsey group as a whole. That's why I stopped watching for a long time. It was annoying. Some of these popped up, so I've watched a few just now. Nothing's changed. I think JD is very good at what he does. Needs to hold women to account, same as the men though. I can see by comments that I'm not the only one who thinks so. Speaking as a woman by the way.

[@Drifter-tw4kt]

He doesn't ask questions or digs deeper plus his advice is suspect

[@kbautista6364]

He was too easy on her. He should have asked if she was having an affair while married to her 1st husband. I have a suspicion she was and got caught, and didn’t want to break off the affair. I mean come on, she ditched the kids for her new man. For what? He was likely cheating during the long distance relationship, as its very clear he's cheating right now. Shameless couples deserve eachother. Her older kids from the first marriage need to focus on taking care of eachother and loving their dad. Child abandonment isn't something you ever get past.

[@pipperlue]

It’s a horrible situation but I can’t help but think about all the men who leave their children with their exes so that they can pursue other relationships or simply a new life….the minute it’s the wife doing it, it’s seen as a much, much, MUCH bigger deal.

[@ethxo6734]

Because women are the natural caregivers. It’s the way nature intended. Women sacrifice mind body and spirit to bring a child into this world. A man just needs to have sex. It is not the same.

[@MrTmenzo]

Both are trash

[@laalchimista23]

​@@ethxo6734this is a disgusting take, don't have children

[@sueblack5794]

yup and they never get called out on it. They often move to other states and will start a whole new life with a new wife, new career, with zero regret. She at least has regret. It is way more common than women leaving their kids.

[@NeiveVeve]

There is a difference when a mother leaves vs a father leaving children. It is more devastating for a mother to abandon her children than a father. It just is that way. Have you been around children who don't have a father vs don't have a mother? Have you picked up on how it is different? I have. Motherless children are different from fatherless children.