dating in your 20s vs 30s (also dating men vs women) GRWM

[@thrivingandsurviving2737]

i love seeing a 30 year-old woman living her life, not feeling "rushed" ew, thank you always for sharing kristen

[@KristenLeo]

🫶🥹

[@n0426]

I felt the “ew” Truly it stems out of insecurity.

[@nonamenojane]

In my 30s, I learned that shared values are more important than shared hobbies. Lifestyle matters, attraction matters, love matters, future plans matter...but shared values help you overcome the hardest times.

[@annabelapurva-madhuri4861]

This 🙌🏽

[@anabluu]

Yes! 100% true.

[@LilyAlcee]

That's what I'm saying.

[@missrebeccabee]

I would love to hear you expand more on your journey of uncovering your queerness. I relate a lot to the deeply buried sexuality. Currently starting to dig it up a little more and it's been terrifying honestly.

[@saphi_a1113]

Been watching Kristen for years and girl, your hair always looks amazing

[@KristenLeo]

👹 let’s forget about that time i chopped it off

[@angelikabatwoman]

I love you in your 30s, Kristen. I think you're getting cooler and cooler and I love your opinions, you got super understanding and open minded in the last years. I look up to youuu

[@KristenLeo]

😭🩷 thank you sm!!!

[@anabluu]

Ugh, the love bombing thing. I got it too in a couple of relationships. I think I've realized by now that they do it mostly because they don't know another way to connect, they hate the "low and slow", so they treat you and speak to you like you're the love of their life from day 1. The thing is , you are not, they barely know you, they are just filling the blanks of your personality with projections about who you are. Then , without fail, one day they see some aspect of you that is not perfect by their standards and they start withdrawing. I don't think it's manipulative, I think they're not having a good time with it, they just do not know how to let time pass to get to know the other person and then appreciate them for who they truly are.

[@18pristine]

loving this new kristen New york era

[@KristenLeo]

👹👹👹

[@Blood0range]

former serial dater here lol. i've learned that it doesn't matter what age or gender someone is, they can be emotional immature. it's not until i went to extensive therapy and became very healthy myself that i was able to recognize other healthy people and see an unhealthy person a mile away.

[@KristenLeo]

Spotting an unhealthy person is a very valuable skill to have!

[@mynameiskeely]

I’m about a week into a particularly rough breakup and really appreciated your thoughts here about having the confidence to move on from something that isn’t working!

[@KristenLeo]

YOU GOT THIS!

[@everydaysaschool-day7517]

Me too... it sucks right?

[@the_washington_monument_am9714]

As an Australian, can confirm that we vocalise without using our lips. And omg yes, finding someone with a compatible lifestyle/set of goals/values is so darn difficult. Mainly because you've got to figure out said lifestyle/goals/values, and then live them for a while.

[@teodoras9611]

i hate listening to people mapping out plans "in this decade u do such&such" but you nailed it still at the first half of my twenties, but i already see the scarcity mindset thing (as maisie peters sings - "learning now means letting go") and about appreciating that more things matter, not only love, and more than love

[@teodoras9611]

p.s. I haven't figured out my path yet and I saw that the reason for that was not lack of ability or ambition, but the hope to stay "flexible" to fit in whoever person's life that i found to be THE person ugh p.s.2 dunno if it's eastern european contries or not, but the thing about men supporting you but wishing you did the housework - hm - i'd agree the thing that made me split from my first real long loving relationship was that this amazing man... well I had to be his mother for a bit and despite everyone's best intentions. apparently i cannot take it even having happened,

[@hummmusqueeen]

I've been loving your content since you moved to NY! I'm a long-time subscriber but hadn't been watching a lot of your videos lately. These last few months, I've been rediscovering you, your content and your personality. It's great to see how much you've grown and lovely to hear your outlook on relationships (funnily enough, your content is now more relatable to me as a queer person than when I first subscribed!). Your confidence and boldness are truly inspiring.

[@KristenLeo]

🥹🥹🥹 oh wow thank you!!!

[@sylvenstein]

Watching your videos and seeing you grow is seriously so inspiring and such a warm hug. You’re helping me feel more hopeful. Thank you.

[@glitterstarbeau]

I feel really good that i got married later (35). I had a lot of fun, experienced a lot of things, and knew who I was. I'm also fairly chill as a mom.

[@faln2pieces]

I’m in the process from healing after a toxic relationship, and trying to stay out of a scarcity mindset. This video was a great reminder!

[@dalsiec]

kristen your videos bring me comfort i just wanted you to know 💞

[@KristenLeo]

🥹🩷 that makes me so happy!

[@officialnicholas1]

The best kind of KL vid, so introspective and smart

[@eloisegrapinet7806]

Thanks for sharing! ✨ I find dating really challenging atm (dating men at least haha) so it felt good to hear you being so confident and optimistic about it!

[@Con_blue]

I feel like i am watching a dating show and you are a contestant trying to prove your worth. OK YOU'VE CONVICED US we all want to date you haha ❤

[@emmapearce3711]

Love you girl! Thank you for representing us early 30s ladies with such delight ❤️

[@ERG11]

Good luck on the dates! And thank you so much for all the tips ❤

[@pauline3114]

thank you so much, kristen! you helped me so much with that video, which i watched with the intention to get some light grwm energy as background-noise (yeah, sorry for that). but you talking about the scarcity-mindset (maybe it's not men for me either lol), you gorgeous human being, showed me that this is, what is impacting me so much at the time. as well as the fact that you really figured yourself out now. i am 24 and not living my 20s as they are intended, but neither moving in with partners as many of my friends do at the moment. there is so much anxiety for in it, that i'll never be lucky enough to find a partner, because god forbid i would use dating apps (yeah simply because it's hell for me, since i don't really know who i am and what i would want a relationship) so in conclusion, this liftet a little weight off my shoulders, it showed me that i myself am still going to change as life is going on. thank you

[@psychedelicspider4346]

Woof, you said the quiet part out loud to me, everything's kinda falling into place for me now... I'm in my 20s, and it definitely feels like I'm hustling and getting to know WHAT I WANNA BE, is something I'm struggling with these days, and my focus so far has been figuring out who I am, but videos like these make me realize that I... kinda... know that already.

[@solongmari]

Its been a while I don't watch your videos, and I'm sooo glad I clicked on this one. I'm in a similar phase of my life, so interesting to hear your thoughts on this. I forgot how I love your mind and how you are able to clearly communicate / express yourself

[@xdeathbygingerx]

Currently going through a really difficult breakup and this really helped me get a new perspective. This was my first healthy relationship and feels like my first true love so I am utterly devastated--but your thoughts on relationships really helped me think about the bigger picture.

[@mercilessfinder4484]

Κρίστεν είσαι υπέροχη. Σε παρακολουθώ χρόνια και χαίρομαι τόσο που βρίσκεσαι σε ένα καλό σημείο της ζωής σου. Go get it girl 🥳❤️

[@ilianna1428]

This video speaks to my soul, thank u Kris

[@tzokos]

What you said Abt your last relationship is not just toxicity is narcissism...we shouldn't confuse toxicity with narcissism simply because anyone can be toxic, even those who end up in the same position relationship after relationship... Take care and never ignore red flags ♥️

[@everydaysaschool-day7517]

What you are saying resonates so much with me. Literally tears streaming down my face 😢

[@KristenLeo]

Wow! Hopefully happy tears? 🥺

[@Michelle-bk5uq]

Smokey eye looks great on you. Hope your dating life is fun and you find what you are looking for!

[@heysfb]

I relate to so much of what you’ve said, at least so far at 20 minutes in. Always appreciate your lil talks and thoughts.

[@mariahzalera2123]

I finally found your channel after all these years ! Yay

[@chiaradelia829]

YOU ARE 30 wow I never would have guessed...Loved this video, felt like talking with a friend while getting ready

[@stacyglez6099]

Good luck with your date! You deserve to finally find your wife 💗

[@KristenLeo]

Amen 🙏 pray for me lol

[@eosalexis]

operation revive kristen's channel is a go. i appreciated all of your insight in this video! i feel similarly about the differences between people in their 20s and 30s. i always tended to date older so i was always shocked when me as a 25-year-old trying to date a 32/33/34-year-old felt like pulling teeth. now that i'm also in my 30s im open to seeing what the dating pool is like. i'm hoping to develop more connections with queer people. also love the outfit!!!

[@KristenLeo]

The life hack is dating ppl in their 40s lol

[@eosalexis]

@@KristenLeo damn you’re calling me out because I literally redownloaded tinder last night and upped the age range for my matches

[@calliecollins5533]

Love these chatty rambly videos, also love the algo 😎

[@Jhi934]

Your dope yessss!!!! I also love myself and think anybody who is with me is super lucky bc im fun and have lots of love to give ! How thankfull i am for this as well. Your content is great Kristen, lucky to have found you here :) love all the way from the netherlands

[@avgr7126]

for the algo- sending lots of love kristen!

[@KristenLeo]

🫶🫶🫶

[@audragormley241]

I really needed this video today ❤ I’m in my 20s and want to thank you for your wisdom 😊

[@vina221]

Omg kristin i could relate to so much of what you said. Being single for most of my 20s (lots of short 1-3 month situationships) meant that i def had a scarcity mindset entering my 30s and wondering if im the problem, am i too being too picky whilst simultaneously ignoring the red flags when i do start dating someone 😂 it’s also hard to remind yourself that there are plenty of fish when your everyone around you is coupling off and you feel like the fish are all being taken up but at 32 im glad i pushed through because the relationship im in now, although its still early days has made me feel way more secure compared to the others so whatever happens now i know that i was right to be patient, go on the dates and continue to know myself through the process :)

[@phoebegonzales]

Enjoyed your thoughts on this, and yes! love yourself! I've been with my fiancé for 8 years and I like to say we're on the same page in life. How we want to live our lives; children, work to live not live to work, smaller house and so many other factors that are so so important are aligned. It's not too much to expect :)

[@liviaelizabeth7347]

so so happy i found your channel!

[@miyamae.miyamae]

Loved the lessons learned. Thank you for sharing your life with us.

[@Rayaelle]

So right about fitting the lifestyles, it's real hard.

[@Owlsworthy]

You are so inspiring! It's easy to tell you've put in the work 😊

[@sxerosie]

Loved this chat, thank you for sharing your experience. I feel so validated haha best of luck to both of us finding our life partners! ❤

[@maryblue8714]

Loved this eyelook, it's very inspirational !😊

[@glassclaws]

okayy, so you say "wisdom" kind of sarcastically, but it is genuinely really valuable viewpoint for me rn 😽😽

[@Eniramoi]

I think 1 or 2 actual makeup brushes would be a game changer for you - also I'd recommend you get some burgundy eyeliner! Also I'm madly in love with that pin-loaded pinstripe blazer

[@marloesk9753]

I don’t know what happened but I enjoy your videos more and more and they have become a bit of a staple. Hope you can really built something with this person, love the self knowledge and confidence cause these are attractive attributes. And the thing about dating people you are actually physically attractive to is a bit of a resonating point I’ve been excepting more but still not fully understanding

[@TheChavert]

This is healing

[@KristenLeo]

🥹 that means so much!

[@lauriannebonnici]

I knew this would come to more than dating. loved it.

[@acornsrighthand]

Wish you luck in your relationship!:)

[@RollingOnFire]

Thank you for this video! Im bi but I havent had a lot of luck with finding gals who like me. I meet bisexuals (guys and girls) all the time but not much happens with the bisexual women I meet. Im also non-monogamous so it does make things more difficult!

[@ElettraPignatti]

I Missed these kind of deep videos ❤

[@hadassahm3016]

I'm single for the first time in 6 years and I hate it 🥲 I've not had a cuddle in two months since we broke up, that's the thing I miss the most tbh

[@bayree4425]

felt

[@goldyblob]

Stay strong, soldier!

[@schadowizationproductions6205]

casual talk with a bit of trauma here and there just what I need for going to sleep

[@bakubaku087]

halfby here wishing U the best of luck with yr dates with this girl!! LET'S GO KRIS!!!

[@KristenLeo]

Halfbyyyyy 🩷🩷🩷🩷

[@susanneshines]

Gosh! I relate to you so much! Thanks for this talk!

[@elitasidiropoulou2175]

You have such an excellent command of English, eloquence and pronunciation on point! If I were you, I would consider teaching such great communication skills with Greeks living in NY that might need to improve their accent or expand their vocabulary. Too bad I am in Toronto otherwise I could have you as a tutor! I moved here in my 30s and my accent has never really changed :(. Good luck with everything!

[@hayley4514]

okay but what about archery girl who called you "babe"? 🥺

[@kikismalling]

Loved this vid 💗

[@restingsadface]

idk if it’s just me but has anyone else noticed the “bisexual in your twenties” to “lesbian in your 30s” pipeline? I feel like I’ve been seeing it pop up everywhere

[@KristenLeo]

Theres also a gay until starting birth control and then turning straight pipeline that is the wildest imo!

[@n0426]

Dating other women doesn’t have to be sexual. Funny thing is most sexually deviant women are the first to get married.. they are usually the ones who follow the culture and like to dis on women who choose to wait for the good person god intended for them. Most of the pickmes are very masculine.

[@Ariana1181]

Love you Kristen!!

[@jessicaplymale]

You are gorgeous!!! Best of luck on your dating journey

[@i123456987654]

Omg I’m 25 and I finally learned how to start taking care of myself

[@CunTrudeman]

Cant wait for the dating your 40s and 50s (even animals) vids too

[@eliadavis3881]

Taking notes even tough I am a 32 years old, Straight Woman that is Married 😂 still love watching your Videos Kristen!❤

[@mirandaosmelak480]

I dunno what is wrong with that YT algorithm, your videos are still very good:)

[@CentraalStationK]

Feeling like an adult after the pandemic/ in my early 30s? Yep

[@findingthebroom]

i have nothing to say but commenting for engagement

[@sparklemachinee]

loving the guerilla girls poster in the background! legend

[@tablelamp801]

Girl where do you find these sublets!? They are gorgeous!

[@nomifreimixes]

i SWEAR i've been wanting to try md hair for the longest time. target audience REACHED 🤝

[@KristenLeo]

They are legit the best shampoo and conditioner I’ve ever used, so worth it and im not just saying it cause they’re sponsors!

[@aspacelex]

I'm just gonna leave this here, it's not an attack on anyone, just summarizing others' experiences. I hear so often from bisexual men who try dating men that they just give up on the whole idea after awhile because of how horrible it is, "how do women put up with this" is a common sentiment that comes up. Peace and love, not all men etc.

[@linnea11]

Thank you for sharing!

[@ericbooth4772]

You look great Kristen!!!

[@svene.]

i love grown-up self-confident kristen with the truly gorgeous hair sharing her infinite wisdom. 🤍 though she's gonna be alright no matter what, i'm crossing my fingers for her third (and counting) date! 🤞🏼

[@833firefly]

No, no, no! Do not put it on the mother! Mother's are already so stretched out, they do their best not to provide the service for their sons. It brings another challenge to woman as so much is put on top of everything else. It really gets to the father figure, as kids model so much and if a man does not step up the kids see that. Putting the blame on the mother only shifts the responsibility from a man to another woman.

[@penultimateh766]

The single population of New York is standing up a little straighter and checking the mirror....

[@gdltc123]

I got married and then figured out im bi so... live up the gay life for me too plz lol 😅 🙈

[@halloooo1duuuuu]

I haven't dated someone in their thirties, and this is solely my experience, but dating people in their forties were the most healthy relationships I've had and these two individuals were much more emotionally mature than those I've dated who were in their twenties. So I have no data, just my own experience.

[@ClementineFox]

Commenting for the algorithme gods 🙏

[@despina250]

I need a video of how to take care of our mental health 😅😅

[@donp8136]

Can anyone else relate to how disappointing dating was in both their 20s and their 30s? I keep being amazed at how every single time people (mostly men but women as well) speak about whom they are attracted to, it is always focused on looks. Men speak about the women they like using the language of a pre-teen, saying nothing about character and giving zero value to anything else apart from conventional attractiveness (with a bit more inclusion regarding body size). Women seem equally shallow and it's just soul-crushing to have all your accomplishments dismissed by the vast majority of the population and strive to look good all the time. I don't know, does anyone else find it hard to receive attraction as an average or even "kinda cute" looking person?

[@0livE3S]

loved the vid Kristen!! i feel like not many people talk about how woman can be very t*xic, people paint this perfect image in queer relationships but t*xic people exist in all se*ual orientations lol ps: i would love you to go to the pod of maddie dragsbaek, emotionally online, you two have similar views on dating and i think it would be very cool seeing a immigrant p.o.v in ny pool dating and an american p.o.v view.

[@KristenLeo]

Thank you so much! 🩷 I’d love to go on the pod! Any podcast you want me to guest on dm the hosts and let them know you want them to invite me, they listen to their audience! 😉🫶

[@0livE3S]

@@KristenLeo Yay! i'm gonna let them know

[@a-ms9760]

That's an interesting point about what kind of trauma a person might bring to a relationship

[@annatauscher4257]

Where are your boots from?!? so cute

[@KristenLeo]

Vestiaire! Search lace up lug sole boots or chunky boots 😉

[@camicamcam1234]

18:51definitely not problematic, if anything very pragmatic

[@kr-5tnyuj]

As much as I do think dating women usually bring about healthier dynamics, I also recently realized my taste in women was way more toxic than my taste in men lol

[@donp8136]

Also, how did you meet your date? I'm kind of second hand excited for both of you (so parasocial of me :D )

[@KristenLeo]

Hinge! 😅 I have no idea how to meet ppl irl lol

[@donp8136]

@@KristenLeo Haha, opposite problem exactly. Can't shake the feeling that people on Greek Tinder are flakes, unreliable or unsocial, no matter how much I try. No offense to the unsocial types :P

[@magdalenafinke]

Its been 2 years since u cut your hair??? :O I remember it like yesterday :O

[@שגיארייסעבאדי]

Love you ❤

[@adellmorth6517]

the part where you said that dating women can also be a pain hit me bc YEA it really isn't all picnic dates and flowers..........still better than dating men tho lmao

[@yeahnah4303]

loove yaa!

[@Etniesgirl56]

Im also Eastern European & bi but never came out to my family. I've known since I was a kid that I liked men and women lol. Question tho, if it's not too personal, how do you go about coming out to your family (esp since ur also Eastern European)? I'm Serbian and I have a feeling my parents would accept me but I really don't want all the judgement and shame that comes with coming out. I think it's very very brave of you to come out especially considering you're from a part of the world where people still commit hate crimes against the LGBTQ+ community.

[@KristenLeo]

I think Greeks are considered balkan but not Eastern European but I think there’s a lot of similarities for sure. I never came out, I just made a video about “searching for my wife” lol and that’s how they found out, coming out is too dramatic imo, nobody comes out as straight, sexuality shouldn’t be a big deal and family members should not be involved or care about the gender their kid or sibling is dating. But that’s just my approach not sure if it’s the best.

[@AnnaEngels]

I was wondering, where is Gigi the cat?

[@elpida9064]

Υπέροχο video!!!🎉

[@alpbakal369]

commenting just cause

[@biljam972]

I kind of would love to go somewhere and start over. But I have a dad here and a daughter (who is adult). And I have a cat who will not travel. But dreaming one day I will have enough money and opportunity to leave stupid Balkan and go and live in South Italy or France or wherever somewhere in some village far away from people. My relationships were all disasters and I envy anyone who had healthy relationship even if it ended.