Lewis Black | 12/8/18 Kansas City MO: Peanut Butter

There are many things to hate in the world. Viewer Bill directs his loathing toward the vilest of all manmade substances: chunky peanut butter.
Submit rants to Lewis: www.lewisblack...
Tour & ticket info: www.lewisblack...
#LewisBlack #PeanutButter #Smooth #Chunky #KansasCity

[@theoak64]

Every couple of months I listen to this rant because it is the essence of perfection in the art of ranting.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

So do I. I never thought just LISTENING to a recording could ever provide the "therapeutic relief & release" of anger therapy. Normally that is something I attain by boxing & kicking a gym bag or by playing tennis against a concrete wall. Lewis' rants are essentially anger therapy, a method used by leading-edge private psychologists 30 years ago, but rejected by conventionally-schooled psychologists _High Risk: Children Without A Conscience, by Ken Magid & Carole McKelvey, 1986_

[@ROXAS-XIV]

Same here!

[@noellejames84]

Ditto! I have it saved. And when I feel like screaming at my brats..I watch this, instead lol

[@ladymantis]

It’s true. Same here. Not a word is wasted. It is pure perfection.

[@LuvMyDogFam]

Oh yeah, got it saved...it saves me every time I listen!

[@TheNefastor]

No one, and I mean no one, shouts "son of a bitch" quite as powerfully and beautifully as Lewis Black.

[@sallychi8406]

As a parent of 4 year old twins, I'm faced with the dilemma of letting them learn wisdom and humor from a great savant of our time, vs. letting them learn truly artistic profanity at too tender an age.

[@westtexastiger]

@@sallychi8406 "artistic profanity" is one of my new favorite phrases. I will be using it. Thank you.

[@JPCox123]

@@sallychi8406 I too will be using the phrase “artistic profanity” with pride. 😂💕🦋

[@panzerkiller13]

No, but Lavelle Crawford gets close lol

[@TheNefastor]

@@sallychi8406 I'm French. I learned my first swear words in kindergarten. Trust me, it hasn't prevented me from growing up into a polite man who says "please", "thank you", and occasionally helps the elderly cross the street. Actions matter, words don't. Look at politicians.

[@danielskrivan6921]

I like how even Mr. Black couldn't keep a straight face while reading this.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

_As I removed it from the bag & gazed at my b e l o v e d peanut butter. . ._ (Lewis must wipe tears from behind his eyeglasses) _Chunky f*** peanut butter?!?! Who eats this sh**?!_ _Only psychopaths & those construction workers who_ _Never finish building the roads! !_

[@Stewz66]

It's 7am. I was trying to decide if I should eat my breakfast or kill myself. This video provided me the courage I needed to eat my oats and go back to work, where my soul will continue to be sucked from my rotting flesh. Thank you Lew.

[@edwardhoulton8725]

Eric Stewart I feel you Eric.

[@Mimi-cq4bg]

We have to be related somehow. Or possibly coworkers.

[@robertfliss2584]

Eric Stewart well it could be worse you could always.......then there’s...........or if you got the clap......just go to work.

[@karlhungus5554]

Keep persevering, Eric. You can do it, my friend.

[@sfaxeh2389]

You got this man.

[@patrickgogan3517]

Humanely slaughtered peanuts 😂😂

[@susanbloom4773]

😂😂😂😂

[@joelbates6499]

The moment (2:10) when his hands shake a little as he removes his glasses to wipe his eyes in apparent bliss, is just magical. And then the remaining rant is classic!

[@michaelginever732]

Bill is brilliant and should be your writer henceforth. He has captured the very essence of your material.

[@jeffnaslund]

Michael Ginever My thoughts exactly

[@itookallthenames]

I agree also it is nice to see the word "henceforth" wading in the neurological cesspit of youtube comments

[@magnificentmuttley154]

Since you know Bill is brilliant, youll also enjoy the following rants. Of course Lewis has alot of terrific material on KZbin, but these three (including "Peanut Butter") are his very best, IMO: Lewis Black: "Recycling," San Diego CA kzbin.info/www/bejne/rni0aIuKgZKtlbc Lewis Black: "Sisters," Des Moines IA kzbin.info/www/bejne/ZmbXdWV7bZKBe7s

[@screenplayhouse4932]

I don't think there is a Bill. I think it's all a ruse. The fact that Smuckers is named made me believe this. And that in other rants he trashes people under the guise of not having said this himself. And this material need not be memorized but simply read on stage.

[@michaellam9819]

@@magnificentmuttley154 milk will always be my favourite

[@windmill10]

Bill this piece is tailored exactly to Lewis' indignation. A job very well done. Kudos to you.

[@5508Vanderdekken]

Thanks

[@mike4619]

This guy has a comedy writer job locked up if he want's it.

[@mckellsarah21]

I love how he is in tears reading this.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

😂😂😂 _As I removed it from the bag & stood there gazing at my beloved peanut butter..._

[@HansLasser]

Normandy beaches on peanut butter canvas, that is real art!

[@IndyMusician]

"...even Chrysler and GM have the decency to pretend to make it look like they're selling you a finished product..." I literally lol'd!

[@NotProFishing]

I know I about died laughing good ole chevy finish assembly upon delivery to customer final assembly to be completed by customer

[@magnificentmuttley154]

Rhythmic notes on "decency to pretend" for emphasis as Lewis slaps the microphone stand on those words. Priceless! ❤ I suffocated in my own laughter, too. Muscles too tight to breathe

[@ethanjones1521]

Omg! I was laughing so hard my husband asked me what the hell was wrong with me. I made him listen to the whole thing!

[@magnificentmuttley154]

👌 👍 👌 👍

[@sonshinelight]

By God I'll never be able to look at peanut butter the same way again! Sunnuvabitch!

[@Brace67]

What a great statement on the human condition so eloquently written by Bill in Chicago. It doesn’t get much better than this and most of us can identify the frustration Bill was enduring. Thank you Lewis for sharing.

[@navirose9133]

Sure hope Bill is working as a comedy writer, a lot of us can use more of his caustic wit.

[@filz4461]

Do you see most people in this comment section be talking about peanut butter while Bill and and lewis are the main story here.

[@navirose9133]

@@filz4461 I'm sorta hoping most of the peanut butter remarks are just tongue stuck in cheek' :-). Does seem to be some recognition of the brilliance of Bill's piece, (not to mention Lewis' extraordinary timing in his delivery) in some of the later remarks.

[@philip6502]

@@filz4461 Lewis Black | 12/8/18 Kansas City MO: Peanut Butter (oh..it's ALL about peanut butter!)

[@kbobdonahue1966]

I loved it when Lewis Black couldn't keep from laughing about Bill's issue with Peanut Butter. 🥜

[@victorhawkins3461]

I don't even know what to say! Brilliant...both the writing and the delivery!

[@e_b_]

That's not peanut butter, that's work in progress 😂😂

[@magnificentmuttley154]

😂😂😂 _...who eats this $h@#?! Only sociopaths & highway construction crews who never finish building the roads! ! !_

[@DonnaSnyder]

e b - 2 best line, yes. I cackled.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

And another line... easily the most ourageous line I've ever heard. _EVER:_ 1:39 _Why_ Smucker's Natural _peanut butter? Not because I'm some nutjob who eats only free-ranging non-GMO humanely-slaughtered peanuts. But because it consists of only peanut butter & a dash of salt..._ TWO F@$#*NG INGREDIENTS! ! !

[@tannerwilson4843]

I love Peanut butter, for example it’s surprisingly good substitute for cream cheese on your bagel! How about a peanut butter sandwich or putting it on your toast in the morning.

[@PredatorFan13]

I watched this 2 days in a row, and couldn't breathe while watching this either time. Thank you, Mr. Black.

[@zeldapinwheel7043]

Oh my god.....😂😂 Wiping tears......I can't remember the last time I laughed out loud. That was a masterpiece. This came up in my feed today. Thank you, Bill. Thank you Lewis.

[@patrickreilly7256]

The all time best letter. Sign him up as a writer. NOW...!!!

[@davidmckendry7684]

James perfectly captured Lewis and his style of delivery over everyday events. They should hire him right now!

[@blindleader42]

Lewis Black at his finest. And with someone else's material, at that. I have to believe the Bill sat down to write with the intention of creating a bit for Mr. Black to perform. Kudos to Bill, and kudos to Lewis for doing it right. Absolutely awesome.

[@5508Vanderdekken]

I did, in fact. Thank you

[@MichaelC1245]

@@5508Vanderdekken hope your face is ok. and your psyche for having to live in a world where they still make chunky fucking peanut butter!

[@livinginvancouverbc2247]

Years ago I am ashamed to say, I always ate chunky peanut butter. Then one day it hit me "Why am I eating this? Do I eat unpeeled hard-boiled eggs?"

[@matthewsmith8573]

Just to be clear, the chunky part isn't the shells, it's just that a percentage of the peanuts weren't ground to a pulp. I still prefer chunky for sandwiches -- adds character. I'll admit that smooth is called for when making PB pie or ice cream.

[@doubledouble4g379]

I like chunky PB - it makes me feel like I'm getting an extra little something for my money, plus the wife can't stand it, so I get the whole jar to myself ;)

[@alakani]

I can think of several other things that would meet those requirements too. Want some? *starts to squat over the peanut butter jar*

[@darcman0]

Best way to get more food for yourself when you have wife/kids is to eat things they don’t like. Dad’s that way with black licorice and peppermint.

[@doubledouble4g379]

Yup, chunky PB, Dr. Pepper, orange chocolate, banana and jalapeno peppers on pizza and sandwiches, whatever you gotta do to get a full meal to yourself sometimes ;)

[@jv-lk7bc]

scrategy!

[@robnor1029]

Found the sociopath

[@matthewfreeman1986]

I have watched this rant twice, I don't think it will ever get old.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

I've watched it easily 20 times in the last 3 months. If laughter can be an addiction, I accept. Sure beats all the other stuff we're known to get hooked on

[@magnificentmuttley154]

Ah yes, a yesr later & here I am. Watching Lewis' "Peanut Butter" performance for the 90th time! ❤

[@RamblinRick_]

Please, dear God, let this rant be really from some guy named Bill, and not just a Lewis Black bit (although, that would be OK too).

[@hankvoight3326]

777scubadiver all of these rants are sent in by viewers, hence his need for the iPad

[@JisooKim-wo3if]

I want to be friends with Bill from Chicago

[@jonp3890]

It remains a question whether he’s alive or dead.

[@nonoozabletodogmaisaiah4577]

It’s either peanut butter or its work in progress! My favorite one.

[@scottlee9373]

Lives in Chicago, one city where there are more weapons than most armies own! Has survived all the ordeals of life! But chunks in his peanut shreds his world! Laughed my ass off! Great rant, and of course, delivered with the finely tuned grace of Louis Black!

[@durchlaucht7050]

That is the funniest thing I have heard in years!!!!!

[@eastvandb]

If I'm going to eat peanut butter, it's chunky. But I love this rant and the ranter. This is genius level indignation.

[@aftonhalters]

indeed!

[@Tryo707]

You fucking monster! Hello police? Yeah this guy right here.

[@yellowdart6666]

genius level indignation is why we love him. his act is all of my family and me bitching about shit while we sit around.

[@samiam619]

Like my skateboard and 10 speed bike, I gave up chunky PB as a child. Smooth, the way God, Jif, and Skippy intended it to be eaten!😁

[@eastvandb]

That's so interesting. I loved smooth peanut butter as a young child and felt ever so sophisticated when I developed a taste for chunky peanut butter later in life.

[@jeffelm8033]

Lewis Black is truly one of the greatest comics of all time ... I was rolling on the floor here

[@tk4225m]

As I scroll through these comments, and see so many people that love chunky peanut butter, I realize that IT'S YOU! YOU PEOPLE ARE THE REASON THAT HORRID STUFF EVEN EXISTS! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU??!!??!

[@badnewsBH]

As a crunchy peanut butter aficionado, I feel a little attacked by this, and yet, I can only smile. :)

[@KOOLBadger]

Why do you eat chunky? Do you like Cap'n Crunch too?😉

[@badnewsBH]

@@KOOLBadger Why yes, yes I do. As long as I don't eat too much, my tongue will survive. XD

[@KOOLBadger]

@@badnewsBH 🤣😂🤣😂 its the roof of my mouth that gets wounded!

[@badnewsBH]

@@KOOLBadger Can't argue with that!

[@KOOLBadger]

@@badnewsBH 🤣😂😉

[@theoak64]

As I listen to this rant for the umpteenth time I’m sitting here enjoying a extra crunchy Jiff peanut butter sandwich.

[@theoak64]

There are somethings in life that are meant to be unfinished and peanut butter is one of those things.

[@michaelmcgilvry7123]

I love extra crunchy jiff

[@dingusdingus2152]

Jiff is full of sugar and palm oil and fillers and extenders and sawdust and god only knows what all else, it is a travesty, an abomination, and it is not peanut butter, it is a peanut butter-like substance

[@83gemm]

Bunch of sociopaths here. You leave bits of eggs in your mayo? Or chunks of tomato in your ketchup? Like the crunch of seeds in your mustard? (I’m just teasing, to be clear)

[@theoak64]

@@83gemm shells add texture and calcium to my Mayo. Love brown mustard and think ketchup is the most over rated and disgusting condiment in the world.

[@dennygarnett9614]

If I wanted to eat peanuts I would eat peanuts. When I eat peanut butter it must be peanut butter.

[@RendezvousWithRama]

If I'm ever lucky enough to teach a class on how to rant, I have just found an example of an A+ paper to show every semester's class.

[@theviciouschickenofbristol4779]

A delivery like none other.

[@susanbloom4773]

Totally brilliant!

[@patbrennan6572]

A work in process, that's one of the funniest rants I've ever heard. Thanks Bill from Chicago.

[@KJ99otis]

Truly one of the best rants! 🤣✅

[@larbueno]

My indecisiveness rises again...I love chunky and I love smooth. DAMMIT!!!

[@kevinconrad6156]

Yep, and I like something else to keep it together.

[@samiam619]

Weirdo. You must be one of those “Independents” who vote for the person, not the Party!

[@chelseamatteoni3734]

its like the playwright he always wanted

[@onlyrick]

Chunky? Not when I can get Extra Chunky.

[@jjohnston94]

That's just called "peanuts".

[@proud2bpagan]

I used to love chunky peanut butter til I had to get my teeth pulled. I feel ya, Bill, I feel ya.

[@MoonHobbit1031]

This is my 7th time watching this video and it cracks me up every time! This Bill guy has captured the very essence of Lewis Black's anger.

[@debbiezenaida]

I ALMOST DIED LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!

[@ontariorailfansunited6489]

Same 😆

[@HopskotchBunny]

Bill has a gift.

[@claudec2588]

That was Brilliant. :)

[@823850]

To mix separated peanut butter, instead of laborious mixing, just turn the jar upside down. For the first day or two, just once or twice a day, but it will loosen up, and flip it over a few times each day, and after a few days, it will be very well mixed at very little effort.

[@hazmat5162]

Toast, Chunky peanut butter, BACON, Drizzle with Honey or Maple syrup! Enjoy!

[@samiam619]

HAZ MAT You are one sick puppy. It has been 2 weeks since you posted your evil recipe. Have you seen a Psychiatrist yet?😀

[@mogeroithe]

HAZ MAT what’s wrong with you??!! You forgot the banana! Sunnuvabitch!

[@johnwolf7842]

Two slices bread. Jiff creamy peanut butter on each slice; layered not too thick/not too thin. Add a layer of Fluff to one slice. Cut a banana across the middle, allowing for it to be long enough to reach from the top of the slice of bread to the bottom; then split the banana length-wise and place opposing sides on outer edges of Fluff covered slice (leaving a gap between the two pieces). Smucker's seedless blackberry jam in the gap. Cover with second slice of bread. Eat = oralgasm.

[@gamesman0118]

I'm a simple man. I like chunky peanut butter and thick chewy bacon on toast. Any bread will do.

[@jackpinesavage1628]

I have better things to do than stir a jar full of non-GMO, organic, social justice warrior, natural $@^&#!* peanut butter.

[@525Lines]

The natural peanut butter that had oil on the top, which you have to stir in, is the way peanut butter used to be sold in the old days.

[@baruchben-david4196]

I used to go to a shop where you put the peanuts into a grinder and made your own. You had to stir It up each time. But I found that if you put it in the refrigerator, it stayed stirred. My life was complete...

[@blindleader42]

Some brands still do. Adams PB is what I get locally.

[@foxibot]

@@blindleader42 oh hell no, you just did not make me ask where adams is during a pandemic, lol. Now I will drive myself insane on the hunt for Adams which by the way I’m sure they don’t make in Louisiana. Lol. I will give my rant later when I can’t find it..

[@blindleader42]

@@foxibot I get it at Fred Meyer, a Western chain that's part of Kroger. It's kind of a niche product owned by Smucker, so it may or may not be available where you see Smuckers. BTW, it's not for everyone. If you make a sandwich with it you need to refrigerate it or eat it right away, before it oozes out. When I buy a jar I put it in the cupboard upside down for a day or three and then lay it on its side and rotate it every day for a while so some of the oil recombines with the solids. It's a lot of work to stir (like modeling clay) if there's a quarter inch of oil sitting on top. The main virtue of Adams is that there are exactly two ingredients: peanuts and salt.

[@foxibot]

@@blindleader42 I loved Fred Meyer, I lived in Portland Oregon for a year and thought it was the bomb. Lol. I thought it had the best fresh produce department.

[@samiam619]

The same thing happened to me. Was it a jar that I could use in a PB cookie recipe, just to get rid of it? NO! It was the “three month” of eating gravel PB&J sandwich size 3 pound jar, FFS! My Wife let me off after a month of suffering, and bought another 3 pound jar of my sweet-smooth-as -a-babies- bottom PB! I love this Woman…

[@KJ99otis]

“gravel pb&j” BRILLIANT! 😂

[@williamgregory1848]

This is poetry. This is Voltaire level writing. Bill should win the Pulitzer (NAY! The Nobel Prize) for his beautifully written work.

[@rogerhwerner6997]

Bill's rant was hilarious.... But with respect ~laughs~goddamn it, the best fucking peanut butter is Skippy fucking chunky style!!!!!!!!

[@awood1604]

It's called Peanut BUTTER. It must be smooth. I hate the consistency of chunky. I struggle with it.

[@samiam619]

a wood YEAH! Does butter have chunks of milk in it? No.

[@waynedub1167]

I got to see this in person, God I miss live events.

[@gregmiga1393]

Creamy smooth peanut butter is for suthners what ain't gots no teeths.

[@principeturandot4593]

I love this. I have no strong feelings about PB, but this is great. 🤣👏🏼

[@jabberwock14]

I've never heard the word Peanut Butter spoken with such aesthetic, ASMR, qualities

[@garrettjackson913]

OMG!!!! IM GONNA PISS MY PANTS!!!! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@bbiggs4327]

Too funny.! A classic.! Never seen him laugh so much at his readings.!

[@invadersel3025]

Gosh this is great! Almost choked on some shrimp tho I was laughing so hard!! XD Lewis is hilarious!!

[@NewMessage]

People who eat chunky are those same people you meet in the street who seem to stare at an imaginary point just above your left ear while the tell you about their 'special relationship' with the moon.

[@rjonboy7608]

I just love super chunky peanut butter. With whole peanuts added. Now I'm coming to hunt you down and tell you about my special relationship with my peanut butter knife...🤯🤪😋

[@samiam619]

But you must hear about My Lord and Pasta, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. On the fifth Sunday of the month we have Smooth PB on our bread instead of the Holy Garlic.

[@marvwatkins7029]

Lewis Black speaks for the World.

[@juzek1958]

I too have mistakenly bought Smucker's Chunky which really isn't so bad. I'd rather have it than some processed, additive-laden smooth peanut "spread". Ultimately, it's just a reminder to me not to be in such a hurry at the store and spend that extra precious second reading the label.

[@daveluttinen2547]

This has to be the greatest Rant ever. Tears running down my face. Thank you Bill in Chicago for this hilarious fuss.

[@daveduffy2823]

LOL, I can’t stand chunky peanut butter either.

[@SirGeorge53]

Oh thank you Lewis for giving us this Christmas treat. It's the best Christmas present I got this year.

[@magnificentmuttley154]

😕🤐😂😆 And _Star Tricks_ returns (your ID photo)

[@sallychi8406]

Gotta love them free-range, humanely slaughtered peanuts... But if that jar of super-natural goober gel has been sitting on your shelf for a few months, good luck mixing the oil slick on the top with the thick peanut-colored tar on the bottom.

[@bmac4]

Theres something genuinely amusing about him using Smuckers as a minced oath lol

[@mark-j-adderley]

Hilarious !

[@dr.jamesolack8504]

Seeing this for the first time (0245 7/18/21) and laughed my ass off. Laughed so hard had a couple tears running down my face. Boy, I sure as hell needed that!! Thanks, Lewis.....from the bottom of my crusty, old heart!

[@samiam619]

The last jar of chunky I accidentally bought, I thought it looked like the surface of the Moon! I solved the dilemma of eating it or cooking with it by just pouring Grape Jelly straight into the jar and spooning it out to lick off the spoon! Ofc I only do this at 4am when I don’t want to go to bed hungry but too tired to make something.

[@sportyg725]

Just when I think my world has gone to shit....I find this ABSOLUTE GEM of a rant. Superior writing and of course the delivery by Lewis is IMMPECABLE. Thank you for making me back off of the ledge with uncontrolled hysterical laughter!🤣🤡🥜

[@jeffreyyanofsky9104]

Lew is brilliant. My guess is that Bill is fictitious and this is Lew reading his material as if from the vantage point of an enraged fU$%in' fan. I'd go on but I'm already starting to rant.

[@seakelp3508]

I grew up in "Smuckers Inc." home town. This ranks right up there with the SNL Smuckers parody back in the 80's.

[@gamesman0118]

With a name like Dead Baby Seals you know it's got to be good!

[@jayfitmob8645]

Louis I got to be honest with you that letter brought me to tears and then made me spit my Subway steak fuck sandwich out on my phone. Back to building this never finished roadway! Signed. Your local equipment operator, Jay. PS: going to do my best to cause a rush hour gridlock today just for the fun of watching a couple dozen people run out of gas and or overheat their cars! Fuckin traffic fuck!

[@Lordmaniax357]

I actually happen to like "Crunchy-F*ck" peanut butter... but loved the rant... (I've also never done road construction but if friends are to be believed... jury is out on the other qualifier.)

[@lilbatz]

I'm wheezing from laffing so hard, and my tears are blinding me. Thank you Lew. I needed this.

[@BallymurphyBabe]

Bill from Chicago I love you!! That was feckin brilliant!! I laughed so hard I nearly pee’d myself!! I completely agree with you!!

[@dublininnis9695]

The writing of this and the unfinished sandwitc..... I lmao... and Bill..... Bill burr was that You?

[@davidsteinke8097]

Ahh that's funny shit. Because I hate chunky fucking peanut butter too. It's unfinished peanut butter. LOL.

[@kathleenbolton-schmukler5727]

I want to meet this Bill from Chicago and shake his hand. Quite possibly the finest most exquisitely GOAT rant. 🧑‍🍳 💋

[@TheWraithkrown]

I have a strange desire to eat peanut butter now....

[@Cluv22]

Only Lewis Black can make an entire rant about peanut butter and make me laugh my ass odd. God bless you sir😅😅😅😅

[@katherynemero9355]

This guy wants pure peanuts, but he doesn't want chunky peanut butter? Smooth peanut butter is artificial. You might as well be eating that sugary paste shit that they make for kids, the equivalent of cocaine in a jar; the stuff that keeps them so high they don't know where they are or where they've been; the wake up hours later, emerging from a fog. I think this guy might be the sociopath. I'm not down with this shit at all.

[@Mike-pr8hx]

The entrails of the production run.

[@lyndakaye5198]

I just LOVE Lewis. He has NEVER failed at making me laugh so hard, i start choking. It is worth being choked out to listen to Lewis's. 😂 rants. I can always listen twice, right? 😅😂

[@swistedfilms]

Chunky peanut butter is great! I don't know what this guy's problem is. Ah well, I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go 'round.

[@shellyhollingsworth3909]

My son sent me this after I added chunky peanut butter to his care package. Lol I'm dying laughing!

[@olevia4942]

He HAD to be from Chicago?! Lolol

[@pollypockets508]

I hope Bill in Chicago writes a book of rants like this.

[@macswanton9622]

I still can't love the smooth pb. It could be wood filler, for all I know. Gimme chunks every time

[@jrperlita11]

Superlative!

[@highbrowloubrew]

Oh my god after watching this for half a decade it finally happened. I bought the wrong peanut butter at the store. Chunky fuck peanut butter

[@samiam619]

It’s 4:30 am. So it’s time for my Smooth PB&J sandwich before bed time.

[@onebigtentdweller9603]

I love chunky peanut butter over a warm freshly toasted english muffin. And to be perfectly honest, the only reason for eating smooth peanut butter is because your dentures are in the shop getting retreaded or you've run out of fix-o-dent and don't have the balls to staple them in so that you may enjoy a proper sandwich spread!

[@maggierezac5820]

@Fenrusbuller, what is this DENTURE you speak of? In my country, US, such things are too cost prohibitive for the masses & our *cough* MedicareLESS doesn't cover them! Nor the needed oral surgery to remove the remains of the formerly known as TEETH; both to allow the proper fit of this DENTURE & also, to prevent an infection going to my heart! True story! Because, a few days & treatment in the Heart Hospital would be so much cheaper??? 😵😖🤣✌☮💨

[@dcb6729]

Hell yeah 😎👍 Me to.

[@pilsung26]

Heathen😢

[@pforgottonsoul]

if i wanted peanuts i'll eat peanuts. My peanut butter needs to be smooth go all the way not half way.

[@mattbrewster8051]

I must be weird, for I LOVE chunky peanut butter.