Lewis Black | The Rant Is Due Best of Squirrels

[@83gemm]

The audience reacting so strongly to that opening line and Lew just staring at them in befuddlement was priceless

[@nevertoooldgaming_Rave]

Lewis is like that one sassy uncle grandpa who only randomly shows up for Christmas but when he does he's everyone's favorite.

[@PredatorFan13]

Don't stop releasing content, Lewis. You're my reason for getting up in the morning!!!

[@xivanquishix3456]

I lost it when he said “Squirrel Gettysburg” *dead* 🤣

[@guyvizard549]

If an animal has hands, then it can PLOT!

[@lindlhubbard2513]

But can’t carry out the plot unless they have thumbs.

[@timsmethurst3508]

Hands aren't neccessary. Ravens are the worst.

[@shipoopeeeeeeeee]

This is the silliest and funniest rant set yet 😂

[@ZoanBlade90]

Have you heard his rant on peanut butter?

[@ArkaeaFCL3]

My grandfather has an area of land that has so many squirrels that the family started calling it "squirrel city." Its truly mind boggling.

[@brokenblister2824]

You mean mind bottling

[@brokenblister2824]

Like when your thoughts are all trapped in your head like a bottle it's mind bottling

[@brandonboewe6198]

I was front row and center at the first show. Got to meet Mr. Black after the show and he was fantastic. I was the guy trying to tell him that the surplus of acorns from the year before lead to a huge increase in the population.

[@luannhetrick-wood9764]

The black squirrels are MEAN. They attack the gray and red ones, believe me I've witnessed it.

[@christopherleveck6835]

@@luannhetrick-wood9764 you want to see a mean squirrel? The FLYING squirrels are really nasty. My grandmother called me over to her house because one got inside. I opened up the entire house and tried to coral the thing out the nearest door or window for about an hour. If it had a choice between freedom and trying to bite me, it tried to attack me. It was horrible. It finally ended up on a window sill withing range of the broom and I hit a Homer. Sent him ass over tea kettle out the window and 3 stories down into the Gulley behind the house. When I went to go home 3 hours later, after cleaning up the enormous mess left from him ripping everything off the walls as I chased him all over the house, he was outside barking at me all the way to my truck..... Flying squirrels are full of attitude just like a fighter pilot....

[@luannhetrick-wood9764]

@@christopherleveck6835 That was too funny.

[@christopherleveck6835]

@@luannhetrick-wood9764 not at the time......but now..... yeah, kinda....

[@luannhetrick-wood9764]

@@christopherleveck6835 I was thinking, maybe the squirrel could have been rabid. That would really be bad if it had bitten you.

[@Diana-ze8wu]

I didn’t hate squirrels until I was a student at UM College Pk. 10 minute haul across campus between classes. It was a game of Frogger trying to dodge as they accosted ppl demanding food. One of ‘em had a knife. Js

[@guyvizard549]

Down here in TX, I feed the cute brown squirrels every day. Have y'all ever had a baby squirrel run up to you and hide under you? It's the most adorable thing you've ever seen. But, I feed them sunflower seeds. Every morning. They come down the trees, and stand on their hind legs, and stare at me until I feed them. Because, if I stop, they'll break my legs.

[@guyvizard549]

HA! My birthday is National Squirrel Appreciation day!

[@tsubadaikhan6332]

They'll break your legs? What are they, Mafia Squirrel's that think you owe them sunflower seeds? Maybe they're from New Jersey, just in Texas under Witness Protection with fake IDs...

[@Washougalite1]

I feed mine peanuts (the birds too) but it's only the squirrel of judgment that will come to the landing of my little porch if I forget 🤣

[@guyvizard549]

@@tsubadaikhan6332 Well, they are 'natural problem solvers...' If I stop, they'll eat whatever they can get, including the neighbor's garden.

[@guyvizard549]

@@Washougalite1 Yep. A little after writing this, I was outside and our regular squirrel came to the edge of the roof and stared at me. She has to follow me over, look at the product in the cup, then allow me to pour them for her. If it's not sunflower seeds, they ignore it and stare. Nothin' worse than a picky squirrel.

[@bigechoctaw5888]

Been a fan since "Red White and Screwed" Your angry finger pointing is priceless 😂😂😂 Complete and total badass 🤘🤘🤘

[@chromicapop4595]

Squirrels fear him😂

[@gingerfoxx1476]

NH resident right here. I can attest, there was a squirrel population boom that year. The volume of roadkill was heartbreaking.

[@trinalittlefield6294]

I think they're booming in Maine this year omg I have sooo many! I had to pop a few off because they were literally chewing up my bird feeders to get the last skrid of seed inside. Every time I go outside they hiss at me from the pines. Little fuckers.

[@vonn4017]

so population in NH is controlled with cars. i like it, 2 birds with 1 stone you gotta go somewhere and take out some squirrels at the same time. i think we can expand this concept

[@chromicapop4595]

I been to NH including Keene the squirrels should be the state trolls😂

[@MasterArchfiend]

The fact this man shares my fear of squirrels does not alleviate my concerns of it being an abnormal fear, but it still made for a good laugh.

[@rah938]

When I was a kid we lived next door to a guy who complained about a big grey squirrel tearing up his screened in porch. My dad got a have-a-heart trap, caught it, and this guy used a can of marker spray paint to give it a stripe. We then drove the squirrel to a remote stretch of woods and released it. A few days later, my brother and I trapped another squirrel, gave it a stripe, and let it go in the guy’s yard. When the guy saw it, he was furious and couldn’t figure out how the squirrel found his way home. Is painting wild animals wrong? Of course it is, but, we were young and dumb. Our dad got a bigger kick out of it than we did. We never told the guy.

[@Washougalite1]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Zerpersande]

PAINTING a wild animal with a stripe is WRONG? What fucking harm does it do? Find something worthwhile to worry about. Jesus.

[@samiam619]

Unless you paint a white stripe on the back of a BLACK CAT!

[@con.troller4183]

@@Zerpersande "What fucking harm does it do? " 1 - Paint is toxic. 2 - Matted fur is inefficient for thermal insulation. 3 - Animals rely on visible cues to find mates. 4 - Many animals will attack members of their own species if given artificial markings. The cruel sport of "painted birds" involves marking members of flocking species so their kin will attack and kill them. 5 - Harassing wildlife is a crime in most civilized countries. Yeah, squirrels can be dicks but being a dick back to them is not justified.

[@davidmushinski8196]

Come on we've all have sinned and fallen short of the Lord but to cone out with a great story is a blessing

[@RIXRADvidz]

Squirrels in the back yard on a particularly rampant rampage. bouncing off each other as they try to get a drink from the pond, there's only One Spot they can drink, it's a Squirrel Thing. Hawks and Owls have a free range buffet, I've seen a few taken out and flown away

[@garykubodera9528]

I was once told by my grandmother about 45 yrs ago that a squirrel is just a rat with a bushy tail! 😃😆🤣

[@NewMessage]

Somewhere out there, Foamy the Squirrel just cheered.

[@thearmchairjournalist566]

We bump into each other in all sorts of places 🤣 I suppose like minds eh 👌

[@con.troller4183]

Only Lewis could heap so much undisguised abuse on an audience and not only survive but thrive.

[@guyvizard549]

Sometimes that squirrel looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a squirrel is he’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn’t even seem to be livin’… ’til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’... You know that was the time I was most frightened. Waitin’ for my turn. I’ll never put on sandals again.

[@musicauthority674]

Squirrelpochlips just the word alone is hilarious. and I thought that was hilarious, and I wasn't' done laughing. and Lewis Black said squirrel Gettysburg. and I couldn't catch my breath I was laughing so hard. Lewis Black is totally AWESOME.

[@Jagerbomber]

Old Man Yells At Squirrel ;P

[@stinkymccheese8010]

Nothing that a few do dachshunds can’t handle, then get a few cats.

[@phelinephrenzy2358]

A backyard squirrel hynotized me into buying 2 lbs walnuts, 4 lbs peanuts and half pound dried fruits from Amazon Prime!

[@samiam619]

LOOK into my eyes….you are feeling sleepy… you will send me a squirrel order from Amazon… 😁

[@hopsta5628]

@@samiam619 bahahahaha.

[@j_emceee]

And that's why I make sure to turn off "One Click Shopping" 😂😂

[@phelinephrenzy2358]

@@samiam619 🐿️🤪

[@phelinephrenzy2358]

@@j_emceee 😆 🚐

[@jeffersonspace]

Hi Mr. Lewis. Thank you for entertaining us... I once saw a squirrel run down a palm tree in what I think was a bluff charge towards a dog (a pointer). The squirrel lost its footing, and was promptly chomped on, and taken into the underbrush. A couple of days later at the behest of certain dog owners, I would be the one to collect the now dead squirrel, and place it in a trash container. Why? Because the dogs were rolling on top of it. Being a park worker sucks, and that is my squirrel rant. Parks worker, Miami. Bless

[@tncorgi92]

I live in a rural county and there is a full-time worker who cleans up roadkill. We get an unbelievable volume of squirrels, armadillos, skunks, possums and rabbits. Oh and deer too. Those things will mess up your car big time.

[@jeffersonspace]

@@tncorgi92 David Lynch's "The Straight Story," has an encounter with a vehicle, and deer. When I was visiting my late Brother in Ocala, FL (I live in Miami), I drove though the Ocala National Forest, and it was made known to me to keep the speed down, and eyes open around dawn, and dusk. A deer can kill you at highway speeds. Thanks Mr. Paul... Bless

[@1MysteryZ1967]

I’m guessing the whole crowd was at the bar for three hours prior to Lewis’ show! 😂😂😂 Bunch of hammered freakers.😂

[@chrisburke2085]

Thank you so much. Love your. Videos. Never disappoint ❤️❤️❤️❤️👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😀

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

This was a real thing...I remember it. There were so many squirrels. Positive vibes from New Hampshire, remember to be kind to each other and yourself during this pandemic and social crisis

[@brockbeckham5020]

Tammy be nice to all living things

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

@@brockbeckham5020 it's my nature.

[@brockbeckham5020]

@@tammystockley-loughlin7680 Nature is what we were put on this earth to rise above/

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

@@brockbeckham5020 how's that working so far, buddy?? That mentality is why our planet heading up.

[@andrewscease8185]

So many dead squirrels that year. It was crazy. And they were swimming to get more food. I’ve never seen squirrels swimming.

[@edhibbard2348]

Lewis, keep it up we all need a laugh. Thanks

[@vixtex]

Lewis Black is my therapy.

[@chromicapop4595]

Me too

[@louisewebb8970]

Squirrel apocalypse 😂 He's keeping us laughing in a world of squirrels, rats and congressman!😅

[@racheladkins6060]

I love the squirrels! Send them to congress maybe more work might get done?

[@leeannross7487]

Lol hilarious,I live in Ohio and have 4 family's in my trees,I counted 18 in one picture 😂 lol squirrel apocalypse 💯😄😄

[@CloudsGirl7]

I usually appreciate our fellow members of the animal kingdom, but squirrels? Those little SOBs that try to steal seed I set out for birds? They can screw off.

[@elirien4264]

Set up a separate feeder for them? There's enough for everyone.

[@d.e.b.b5788]

@@elirien4264 No there isn't; the squirrels pack up their cheeks and bring the food back to their home, store it away, and come back for more again and again until the friggin' bird feeder is empty. so I hung the bird feeder in the middle of the 30 foot clothesline, ten feet up; no dice. Squirrel slid himself hand over hand (foot over foot?) upside down all the way down the rope, to the feeder, and repeated the process.

[@crowfoot7355]

Sago Lewis you bring intense joy 😅🤣😂👏👏👏👏

[@NSABF]

This made me laugh especially hard because chunky Smuckers peanut butter is the only kind I like 😹

[@zetectic7968]

There was a UK TV comedy back in the 1970's called "My wife next door" after a divorce they both wanted a fresh start so bought adjoining cottages in the country without knowing until they moved it. Due to a former Duke of Bedford who brought grey squirrels (Scurius carolinensis) from the US which of course escaped, they have out competed and given disease ( squirrel pox) to the native Reds. Who have been eradicated from 90+% of England & Wales

[@fessparker9399]

The New Philadelphia/Dover area of Ohio has a squirrelpocalypse of giant black squirrels.

[@aaronbono4688]

I work at a nature center and we deal with squirrels brought in who are injured or need help and the babies are adorable, but once they hit adolescence they turn into vicious nightmares.

[@j_emceee]

Well, like most adolescents...

[@chromicapop4595]

Bird feeders are never the same after too😮

[@gingersgiraffes219]

I was at that Keene show!

[@InsomnoManiacal]

Statewide SquirrelFuck Day. It should be a Friday for the long weekend effect

[@rhuephus]

ha ha .... bestialities for you

[@B.H.56]

I remember that squirrel apocalypse. Dead squirrels everywhere.

[@johnterry4987]

I have a Brittany Spaniel and he hates squirrels. I called him Cell, guess I should have called him Lewis.

[@velikovskysghost]

It's nice to see Lewis alive and doing well, and I believe he is right about the squirrels taking over.

[@elainejohnson6955]

Made me think of the scene in the movie "Patch Adams" in the Psych Ward where they attacked the squirrels with the bazooka!!!

[@elaineluikart5459]

If you want to get rid of SQUIRRELS go to Walmart buy a bag of corn in the hunting department for less than $10, spread some in an open area and when the squirrels are digging around in the grass stuffing their cheeks with the corn, the hawks will swoop in and grab them.

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

I like it...use nature to nab those buggers. Positive vibes from New Hampshire, remember to be kind to each other and yourself during this pandemic and social crisis

[@KieranMckean]

It's 5* degrees here and I saw four squirrels playing hide the sausage outside.

[@roberthouston2684]

Squirrel-sicles?

[@Grundle-buddy]

Lewis Black goes golfing, and one of the golf clubs he carries is strictly for rabid squirrels. Is what i hope he was gonna say. lol

[@dionettaeon]

Let's face facts, those little suckers are fast. You might not have time to grab your designated rabid squirrel golf club before it gets you. You must be prepared for any golf club you have on hand to potentially be used to yeet a rabid squirrel across the field.

[@nigeldeforrest-pearce8084]

Hysterically Brilliant!!!!

[@hbwblacksmithing]

Here in Kentucky we just eat them all

[@lazchurchyard1229]

He called us out on all the likka stoahs 🐿️

[@nolby1758]

I could just follow lewis around on his general day to day activities and I'm sure I'd be pissing myself all the way.

[@barbh5565]

Love your rants, Lewis...and i'm in total agreement about those SOB's, fu#%in' squirrels. They dig in my garden & flower pots to steal my flower bulbs or to bury a nut to dig up later...i put up a tarp to cover my back patio from the sun and one of the little bastards was having a ball tearing it from end to end , no doubt using it for nesting material! Never had any of them do that....ever! That one won't be back...guaranteed. And they won't stay away from my bird feeders...but i have a small solution....VICKS! I goop that stuff on the chains or ropes my feeders hang from...anywhere they climb...they get that stuff on their little hands and their fur and in their eyes!!! HA HA HA Unfortunately i need to reapply every month or so but i buy the cheap stuff from the dollar store so it won't eat up my SS "Income" and you should see them run around with their eyes closed...you'll piss yourself laughing. If you get out to WA state i'll definately be at your show...western WA anyways....take care of yourself.

[@Wawiya]

Squirrels are the trolls of nature They can be loud with their chirping sounds I feed them bread they're away perched on trees. When I was a teen my friend would record Dr demento from a radio show from Ottawa and play it on the phone the song went Squirrels we gather up nuts Squirrels, cars splatter our guts

[@tncorgi92]

I love Doctor Demento, I'll have to look for that song.

[@kellygervais3440]

He is the best, the look on his face when he is trying to figure out wth is going on with the squirrels, lmfao and then it hits him, lmfao, and he's off....

[@suzannegiglio2866]

Hysterical!

[@nigeldeforrest-pearce8084]

Brilliant!!!

[@michaelanderson9792]

I had a male cat that played with squirrels so much he thought he was a squirrel he made squirrel cherps would eat his food with his front paws and when he was surprised his tail would puff up he ran away one night and I believe he married a squirrel

[@NicS_313]

LUUU! Can we get another book soon?

[@thearmchairjournalist566]

Pls come to Australia ASAP Lewis 🙏

[@DarkSektori]

So what are the Squirrels infected with the rage virus from 28 days later?

[@davidbryanbartlett4071]

Almost piss myself every episode

[@tonyarichards5430]

I’m in VT a mile from NH. My cat is working on the problem. He’s fat.

[@rhuephus]

don't let that cat get too fat, he won't be able to catch any more tree rats

[@Iffy350]

Here in Georgia. New Hampshire want some whitetail deer of which we have too many. Whitetail deer eat acorns.

[@ancientbedrock9366]

Fear not Lewis 😂 small rodents (like squirrels, hamsters, guinea pigs, gerbils, chipmunks, rats, and mice) and lagomorphs (including rabbits and hares) are almost never found to be infected with rabies and have not been known to transmit rabies to humans.😂😂😂 Almost never 😂😂😂

[@scionofdorn9101]

Sounds like my ideal state. I like squirrels.

[@douglasmorris6930]

I found this, Small Rodents and Other Wild Animals Small rodents (like squirrels, hamsters, guinea pigs, gerbils, chipmunks, rats, and mice) and lagomorphs (including rabbits and hares) are almost never found to be infected with rabies and have not been known to transmit rabies to humans. Might make you feel better

[@roberthouston2684]

But they can transmit bubonic plague from the fleas that infest them.

[@chromicapop4595]

The squirrels near my street keep hollering in the trees every morning its getting annoying trying to calm them

[@baileyantonengpei7860]

Oh I’m crying .. oh shit .. lol squirrel apocalypse Lmao NH vs Vermont

[@hibiscusfreak]

I love squirrels. But in all my 60 years, I've known them to fear humans and to run away from us. However, in the past couple of years I've encountered a few squirrels who did not follow this rule. While I was walking, they approached me from the front, trotting towards me as a puppy would. A panic set in and I thought "How close will he come? Is he gonna stop? Why isn't he afraid? Is he going to do a run up my leg and onto my face at breakneck speed? What the HELL is going on???!!!!"

[@ShadowveilFox]

it was probably Foamy. he does not fear humans. he has often been seen throwing acorns at people with enough velocity to take a human's head clean off their shoulders. there's also a video where a dude is working in his garage and this squirrel had a plan. it just walks in and straight up goes for the guy, attacks him, gets thrown on the ground and continues to sit there not phased at all while he watches the human run away. he claimed that garage.

[@ericball6000]

@@ShadowveilFox Foamy?, thats to funny.

[@hibiscusfreak]

@@ShadowveilFox Lol, ok.

[@tinaworley5584]

In my younger days, squirrels at my mom's house we had a family of squirrels at her house. They I thought had a purpose of tracker mail from the mailman. Mail would come and go. Yet around the mailbox would be their tracks. I thought about putting a sign, . Evidently the lewis rant understands more.,what would I put on a postage squirrel sign?

[@d.e.b.b5788]

Won't matter, squirrels can't read.

[@truthhurtsnews9206]

Law in Minnesota...cannot own a squirrel.

[@tncorgi92]

St. Petersburg, FL was full of damn squirrels when I worked there. You couldn't sit anywhere outside and enjoy your lunch without the little bastards trying to climb on your lap or your shoulders and steal food. They weren't "tame" as such, you couldn't touch them and some people were bitten, the squirrels were just conditioned to view humans as a source of food.

[@fueymanchoo1291]

Speaking on behalf of the squirrels you should know one thing. We have a plan. :) Happy Squirrel day!

[@artofdisguy3401]

BEWARE!!! The Rabid Red Squirrels!!! They Play with Their Nuts!!

[@Caperhere]

You actually had to put that note in the description? Hahahah. Where’s Billy the Pest guy when ya need him?

[@ohms497]

I see squirrels.....🐿🐿🐿👀😬

[@aliciachristopher6506]

Squirrels like black walnuts too.

[@michaelreidperry3256]

Just let them fucking have it, Lewis! Goddammit!

[@jasonwilcox6890]

Yeah in savannah GA my yard was covered in them..as big as cats. I Shit you not.🙃

[@1indarkness]

It's cute bc squirrels are cute AF 😍

[@philiplewis1989]

This had me fucking rolling. . . #Squirrelpocalypse

[@valueofnothing2487]

Actually, an Affinity is $258. You can put a Warmoth neck and nice pickups and trem on that.

[@theodoregarman5322]

I have been listening to lewis black since 90s and yes squirrels there's nice one's and ghetto one's; the nice one enjoy the nut you give'em and the ghetto one ripped your hand off and take the bag

[@joshuamoore4537]

Squirrel 🐿️ Fu•k Day. 😆

[@FrankBenlin]

So much hate for squirrels here. I didn't know.

[@backforblood3421]

You really wouldn't like an orphaned baby squirrel, Lewis. They don't really bite, but they climb inside your clothes and painfully cling to you with their F'ing claws as if you were a F'ing tree.

[@georgeschlaline6057]

There are always on my roof causing damage

[@sullivan2339]

Bring in a bunch of Coyotes !

[@herebemadness7054]

Too many squirrel feeders in too many yards.

[@wryter93]

Put out a bird feeder. Squirrels will come, aim well.

[@Styphon]

Tree rats

[@johnstephens9675]

My neighbor used to feed them by hand and even had names for them. She called them one of Gods creatures, wouldnt kill anything mice or roaches. All of them were Gods creatures.

[@d.e.b.b5788]

God's creatures are food. Or he wouldn't have made them taste so good!

[@breakupgoogle4584]

Squirrels vs the National Guard. My moneys on the squirrels and its a safe bet.

[@samiam619]

We all know that Australia doesn’t exist, but look up “The Emu War”

[@georgeschlaline6057]

DANG BLASTED squirrels can go to FREAKING HELL

[@Hacksaw37]

Couple of years ago red squirrels were chassed out of public parks in England by the more invasive gray squirrels. Do they know you can eat squirrels?

[@d.e.b.b5788]

Mmmm. Squirrel head soup. The heads bob up and down when it boils. Hillbilly gourmet.

[@johndesjardins6089]

My father retired in the early 1990's. So he decided to get a bird feeder to watch the birds from his chair from the den. As you're might know, squirrels and other little critters like to invade bird feeder. But my father knew how to solve that problem. He just took aim with his pellet gun and shot them pesky squirrels that were invading his bird feeder. He would sit in his chair watching TV in the den and if he say a squirrel invading his bird feeder. He would shot out of the window from his chair and 99% get the squirrel or any other critter that invaded his bird feeder. One day, his friend next door Bud ask him, " Jean-Paul, I have not seen many squirrels around." My father told him, " Bud, it was because the squirrels were dying of lead poisoning."

[@tncorgi92]

There's a guy on KZbin who does squirrel catapults. Lures them into the sling with bait and then WHOOSH.

[@CARRJ142]

[@Heavilymoderated]

Too many squirrels, or too many people?

[@diytwoincollege7079]

If they would stop having drunken $ex with the squirrels, there wouldn’t be so many of them.