Loving Someone vs Being in Love

In relationships, especially for those new to dating or convinced they've found their forever person, understanding the distinction between "being in love" and "loving someone" is crucial. This video covers some key insights into this important differentiation.
Being in Love: This stage is emotionally charged, filled with elation, butterflies, and joy. It's often referred to as the infatuation or lustful stage.
vs
Loving Someone: This is less about intense emotions and more about commitment, sacrifice, and working for the relationship. It's a choice you make daily, regardless of fluctuating feelings.
Understanding these concepts can help couples build a stable and enduring relationship, grounded in the mutual choice to love and support each other through all life's challenges.
Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC is a psychotherapist, specializing in intimacy, parenting, body image, and relationships.
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[@relaystationtoo]

Interestingly, fell in love with my wife 24 plus years ago. She never aged, only became more and more beautiful. I loved her through the tough times, the good times, and the horrible times and would do it all over again. When I discovered her affair, I crashed... still love her, but hurt so very bad.

[@gameofyou1]

Same here. It is brutal and devastating. Everything you thought you knew was wrong, and you feel like you were living a lie.

[@relaystationtoo]

@@gameofyou1 Definitely. So sorry for everything you have gone through. After so much trickle truthing and trying to understand how this person I thought I knew could lie and deceive. It's been one horrific nightmare. Take good care of you... I have no idea how one gets through all of this and doesn't completely lose their mind and soul.

[@abhijitmajumder9278]

You are absolutely amazing!!!! Deepest gratitude...

[@ElimEx1]

So if I rephrase because I'm trying to understand. Couples together for a long time don't love each other, they just chose to stay together?

[@quicknotesmedia9540]

I hear you. I’m confused too. My ex husband told me when he filed divorce “I love you but I’m not in love”. It’s better to acknowledge staying in love and really liking your partner.

[@ElimEx1]

@@quicknotesmedia9540 So after a lot of searching and reading, I think I understand. Being in love with someone is basically limerence, nothing more. It doesn't last. But loving someone is a choice you make by tolerating them and deciding that you can live with their qualities and flaws for a while until you decide you can't anymore. Makes sense...