Manipulative Creep Uses "Mental Illness" As A Shield From Accountability

Autism is a real mental disorder fellas, but using it to cover yourself from accountability is mad cringe an ting.
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Credit to Marshalice for editing!

[@CritCrab]

This is the game of thrones of RPG horror

[@oinkerdapig6293]

haha true

[@NINJANOOB777]

@@oinkerdapig6293 draining my mind is impossible with there is nothing possible to drain thats why the belief in vamp drain is a sin lol the nice guy and the women is wrong on both counts yet at least she was an angel vampire than gave constant drain heal instead of waht the nice guy he was so called did he was a blunt social pathic bullet blaster of words thats why he couldnt be allowed at the store or anywhere lol in most soical circles i can hang out and have hung out with poeple ten times worse than me or other people yet they have returned from losing all th sanity while being sane enough to life right enough to make money or even if poor not rob poeple anymore they got such carthic healing of mentals that they are just walker healer angels when other even having no faith in angels yet at least the are the unknowns of the world that work in high places to stop people millions of times worst than me and that gives me solace..

[@FreedomAndPeaceOnly]

Oh my god this is the biggest cringe psycho ever featured on this channel. He is not autistic, he is 'just' psycho.

[@danielmcardle2929]

Oh crustation king it is true

[@svgaming263]

just to let you know autism isnt a mental illness and you really shouldnt call it such

[@partyontheobjective]

i feel bad for the store owners. they run a business, not a kindergarten.

[@Elhvir]

This is quite close to what I thought. They were just trying to do their job, but got caught in the crossfire when the Nice Guy looked for ways to escalate things and just get stuff done in his way.

[@TheMightyBattleSquid]

Why not feel bad for the event organizers either? They've done nothing wrong in this whole story.

[@Djidgy]

That’s game stores for ya

[@oldstump1628]

@@TheMightyBattleSquid they were dishonest as fuck. Everything they typed seemed like a lie .

[@kitsunekyubi9358]

me too

[@AspieMemoires]

I’m autistic, and I still keep my worst behaviors under control and show discipline. Big difference in wanting people to understand the why you do something, and forcing them to accept it. They don’t have to. Just at least know where it stems from.

[@n0etic_f0x]

I know right like, you can have weird idiosyncrasies that can be charming. Like you don't have to be... like this. You can be weird and likeable.

[@migangelmart]

I'm autistic too, and what drives me up the fucking wall is the shit eating grin I see when the dim light dawns behind their eyes that "Here comes an easy target!" Yeah, Homie don't play anymore. An eye for an eyelash, a tooth for a toenail. The HEWMONS hunt what they fear AND I'M SICK OF IT.

[@eggmug562]

@@migangelmart SAME.

[@jackmack4181]

@@eggmug562 I was once in a class full of normal people and they were practically animals, while my autistic self was quietly doing my work in the center of the class.

[@madnessb8305]

Same thing for me.

[@APerson-ws4cw]

I recently had to ban someone from my D&D club for this kind of thing. He sent abusive messages, and justified it with depression and because they 'angered him'. Thankfully he's getting the support he needs.

[@thegrandxbunny2073]

That's great to hear.

[@jack19995]

Yes, thank you for not throwing someone like that on the curb. Kicking from the game is fine but at least making sure they are getting the help they need is where so many people go wrong

[@APerson-ws4cw]

@@jack19995 yeah, plus it didn't read as someone who was just a jerk at all times. It read like someone who was going through some things and didn't know how to deal with it. It didn't justify any of his behavior, but it does explain it.

[@thaloblue]

I have complex ptsd, social anxiety disorder, and severe depression. My mother and father both probably have complex ptsd. My mom is a constant performance-based aggressor and narcissist. My dad is a spiteful enabler. Their example was so rotten and fucked up that I determined I would never be one of these bitches that let their mental illnesses run rampant, turning them into abusive monsters. No excuses. I can barely work. I can barely function as an adult. I’m friends with my roommates and they enjoy being around me because I am NOT an asshole.

[@Vaigne_]

Im not autistic, but i do have Explosive Bi-polar disorder, and any game im a guest in or have new players, I ALWAYS tell people off the bat. Especially since im built like an NFL offensive lineman. And apologize in advance if i trigger, since Im still in the process of getting a suitable medication to level me out. and EVERYONE I've played with was more than happy to work with me or let me know if im starting to trigger. Thankfully, I havent had an episode so bad that it warrants a critcrab worthy event. because I know what i am and dont want to ruin the game for other people for my problems.

[@Elhvir]

As a person with manic-depression, I am glad to hear others being open about this stuff and am glad it is working for you so well. I've had few cases where my excitement has gone over the top, and only reason I've avoided horrible cases after one incident has been 'cause I told everyone "so I might get over-worked, please just remind me if I seem to get too over the edge, I am not actively aware of it myself".

[@jack688]

Good on you Vaigne! Mental illness is a tough thing, believe me, i have had depression since i was 12, and severe anxiety developed from it. I do the same with people i am meeting, or if i sign up for a D&D game, i will mention it, because really, its just fair. Its part of who we are, and most of us dont use it as a crutch. On the contrary, i have said many times, i would not be the man i am today if i did not have my mental illness. I am 33 now, and i have helped people who have kids with mental health issues, and just being a supportive ear to talk too. I have my good days and bad like anyone else, and we just need to take them one day at a time :).

[@rmburk]

And that's the exact right thing to do! You also know it doesn't give you a free pass to be a dick to people and they just need to get over it. I've got a couple of mental health issues but I can't use it as an excuse for bad behaviour.

[@RecoveringReprobate]

That's fucking Chad behavior right there brother. Good to see a King taking responsibility of the problem instead of using it as an excuse.

[@tesreso5448]

Just want to say you are a decent human being, understanding a flaw and working on it. That is a good thing, i hope you find a good mix that helps you be the best person you can be without having any episodes, cause i know thats a huge fear, and having it off your back makes things so much better. Keep up the good work! :3

[@striberx]

As someone who has aspergers. It sickens me every time someone tries to use autism like this. It is not meant to be "your get out jail card" its meant to show while there are some troubles, we have more than the capability to change and be better. this person did not and it was disgusting to me that he thought saying such a thing would work.

[@thatzerogirl]

as someone who is also (probably) on the spectrum, fuckin ay. Autism explains certain behaviours, but being outright malicious like this? nah fam, thats not the autism, that's just you at this point.

[@Midnight3Wonder]

My approach to situations where my own autism gets out of hand: I let others know about my autism, share any warning signs of it that might come up and cause issues, and ask them to be willing to call me out and remind me if I start to step out of line. I will apologize if I've upset anyone, step away from the situation if I must to compose myself or anyone else needs space from me, thank them for the reminder, and try to sort things out so that we can still do whatever it is we're doing. I've luckily gotten much better at controlling my odd quirks that are a result of my autism to the point that they rarely become an issue, though it does rarely still happen from time to time. In those rare occasions, I'm more than happy to try to talk things through and help those around me understand why I may behave a certain way and ask them to be willing to call me out so that I can stop myself from taking things too far and sort out the situation down before they get bad.

[@MeepChangeling]

Not all of us have the capability to change. I'm glad you do, but many of us hit a wall which cannot be passed. I've done that with understanding human emotions and behaviors. I understand all I can, and I clearly will never understand more than I do. That said, I do my best to not be a cunt.

[@ruquang89]

100% agree, sometimes things get too much and i will blow up on someone when this happens after i calm down i will appologise and explain the what happened but also let them know its ok if they dont forgive me as my actions were out of order autism isnt an excuse to avoid consequences

[@jakk2631]

Same Here

[@patdav56]

"It explains it, it doesnt excuse it" This is a line that I live by with my Asperger's. I constantly apologize for transgressions and seek to fix my mistakes. People like this are some of the few people I genuinely hate, using their disability as an excuse to be an a-hole paints everyone else with that in the same light.

[@LilChuunosuke]

same! I don't have autism, but I have ADHD as well as a lot of inexperience with social situations due to childhood iscolation. I like to explain to people what was going on in my head so they can understand why I behaved the way I did (and maybe even get a better grasp of what I'm misunderstanding), but I make it clear that I'm not saying this to shirk responsibility. Even if I didn't hurt someone *intentionally,* I still caused them pain and should be held accountable for it. I just oftentimes want that accountability to come with an explanation of what I've done wrong so I know what to avoid in the future. I want them to know that it wasn't intentional and I need an explanation so I don't do it again. Not a free pass.

[@diablo.the.cheater]

I mean, it excuses it to a degree, but there is a limit to that excusability, like it can excuse not being able to read the room or something like that, specially if you have said it from the start that you have trouble with that and you need the room to be readed to you, and when someone reads it for you, then you act accordingly. Like it can excuse small behaviors that can be corrected inmediatly with the others help, but not much.

[@mpo48]

more than often though people hate it even if you apologize you can literally never have a conversation with a normal person since they always hate autistic people, i have experienced this and this is all true

[@patdav56]

@@mpo48 I've never met someone who hates someone just for "autism". They may be bothered by aspects of their place on the spectrum that come out more than others, but never full hatred for my or my friends' condition(s), and if they did it's mainly due to ignorance and stereotypes. I also dont bring up my autism to someone as *part* of my apology; to me, if I screw up because of my condition, I still see it as somewhere I need to improve on regarding it, so I apologize, work on fixing my mistake, and leave it at that. People will just either tell I'm autistic, or I have to admit it during something that requires that knowledge, like an interview or visiting a new doctor.

[@mpo48]

@@patdav56 so your saying hide something thats part of yourself because other people will never accept it? Thats what it really means right? Well fuck that, im going to tell them they are going to know and if they wont accept me then they are racist, maybe its different where you live or you have good luck but ive only been running in to people who hate me for my autism.

[@garrysucks4190]

Honestly, imagine a sort of Campaign set in Feudal Japan where one character is mysteriously gone from the group for a while, then 7 in game years later, they come back and tell the tale of their adventures in Mexico or the USA

[@lawlznet]

kinda wanna steal that for my own campaign, thanks!

[@rat_mikey]

@Samuel Parker woah that's so cool!

[@edwardg8912]

Should check out The Samurai by Endo. A book on that exact subject by a Japanese author.

[@professoroak7545]

Kind of reminds me of cheech and chongs Corsican brothers haha

[@ashfister9949]

"I'm autistic" as a defense is both my favorite because it lets me Uno Reverse with a "me too, and?" But also my LEAST favorite because I cannot stand being lumped in with these people

[@Maibak3175]

The true Uno Reverse with this is that "nice guy" isnt autistic. He was calling OP out for doing EXACTLY that.

[@midnightgamer2088]

Same lol

[@hoaujudaiyubel]

You don't need to. You are you and only you. No need to lump yourself with anyone like that.

[@Elusivearth]

I definitely think OP had some hand to play in this whole problem, the fact that they glossed over all the drama and blamed everyone else is a bit weird...

[@fredrickjones566]

My thoughts exactly. They even glossed over the fact they got banned. Which means they were already guilty of a previous infraction. It seems to me they hold themselves in pretty high regard with little self awareness.

[@Elusivearth]

@@fredrickjones566 any glossed overr facts usually are left out for a reason, often to favor the one telling the story. Your point about the ban I totally forgot about, they obviously did something to atleast inflame a situation to the point where a ban is necessary. Narcissism at work

[@rgnhel]

Like dudes already said here and Crab itself, no one is banned out of the blue, and if "things were a misunderstanding" the ban is utterly undone. Drama ridden people, dragging chill folk into their own horsedouce.

[@Necrow_Productions]

Yeah, OP was also trying to be blameless the whole post

[@DragonSlayerRob]

Yep and the fact they say they’ve had multiple drama problems with different ppl and the girl here defends the “nice guy”

[@Ricky-jl1wf]

Also OP's telling makes me believe their club is a magnet of problem people.

[@pastaconnoisseur8441]

Makes me think about the common denominator of all these bad experiences may be OP. They kind of handled this like shit to be honest; they never tried to talk it out with the guy, just immediately went around asking others for their OPINIONS on him. I get that he did some crazy shit and it's not really their fault, but they didn't do their due diligence with this situation.

[@demoulius1529]

I got that impression as well. The entire group is described in such a weird way and there seems to be drama 24/7.

[@viderevero1338]

@@pastaconnoisseur8441 It's definitely a community that drives on Drama.

[@natkatmac]

@@pastaconnoisseur8441 I agree that it was handled poorly, but I wouldn't blame the fact that they wanted to learn what reputation he had earned.

[@pastaconnoisseur8441]

@@natkatmac That would have been fine if they had gone to that guy first and tried confronting him on his problems

[@ramblinjack1797]

Does it bother anyone else that “gaslighting” is often used in place of “lying” to embellish the severity of stories like this?

[@billbills4083]

I think that's because a lot of people dont actually know what it means. So people throw it around as you said to embellish. At no point did I see anyone questioning their own sanity, except for maybe myself by the end of it.

[@Cheetahgirl_Studios]

@@billbills4083 So true. Gaslighting isn’t the same as lying. It’s deliberate mind games played by narcissists to turn the victim on themselves, making them question every single action they do. It’s a manipulation tactic to make sure that the gaslighter has complete and utter control over their victim, because they undermine the victim’s self confidence so severely that they’re left codependent on the abuser. It’s not the same as telling a lie. Lying is bending the truth. Gaslighting is used to confuse and disorientate the victim so that they’re left in a vulnerable state by their abuser.

[@billbills4083]

@@Cheetahgirl_Studios kind of adding unnecessary bits there. They dont have to be narcissistic to gaslight, another term I think that gets thrown around too much. While it is considered synonymous with selfishness, the definition implies more than that and most people cant/shouldn't make that claim about another person without proper knowledge, understanding, and evidence. Then again I may be more thinking of narcissistic personality disorder. Either way, my point stands, and both have some overlapping tells.

[@Cheetahgirl_Studios]

@@billbills4083 Ah. I see. My apologies. I’ve been doing some research into gaslighting, and that was the condition that seemed to be closely correlated to it. I apologise for the misinformation. Thanks for correcting me.

[@billbills4083]

@@Cheetahgirl_Studios you are definitely right about them being close to one another, one can assume a narcissist would use gaslighting as a mechanism to further their own goals and bend people into thinking their reality is true. I've done a good bit of research myself over the past year after being accused of gaslighting, only to find that I was the one being gaslit. Its interesting the way people project and bend the truth to get the outcome that makes them the victim or absolves them of their harmful acts. When gaslighting fell through, it went to I was a manipulator and I did all these certain things to control her. People, I find, tend to project when they dont understand what you're thinking, your own insecurities bleed onto me and then try to pigeonhole me. Damn I wrote a lot not really pertaining to the subject but I enjoy talks like these. Have a great day :)

[@CoolGuy-th7bl]

This is an insanely drama ridden group. I would have bailed from the whole thing ages ago.

[@ayf449]

That store... The 5th time he he called about the ban thing they should've just told him "yes you're banned. Don't ever come here again or we'll call the cops on you. Have a nice day~" Because that was ridiculous and my brain is jello after finishing this video

[@mytotim8978]

@@ayf449 No because the store don´t want to banned him, just the pathetic loosers who use the store to play but thing they own the place. The store should banned all of them, because they drag the shop to their personal issues and behave like they own it.

[@SirBanana1992]

I'm autistic and I hate when people excuse my behavior just because I'm autistic, maybe I was just rude and stupid, I shouldn't get away with honest mistakes and be treated like it's not my fault! I rag about it to my mom sometimes who has a tendency to do that at times.

[@remainprofane7732]

I can relate. I’m always really worried close friends and loved ones won’t tell me if I’m misunderstanding something or killing the vibe bc they don’t want to hurt my confidence.

[@augustaseptemberova5664]

Yea, this makes me mad, too. Autistic or not, an essential part of personal growth is getting one's actions reflected back by others, positive or negative - and then, if needed, owning up and trying to do better next time. And it's especially crucial for us with autism, because so many of us are bad at reading social cues and/or body language and other subtleties like that.

[@lobokujo7825]

All I got from this story is that "community" must be such a pain in the ass to deal with... Everyone involved in the tale just seems like an annoying Douchebag. My apologies for the edgy language, but in my opinion, I would hate to be the store owner/employees trying to run a business while these overly self-involved losers wage the worlds most pathetic gang war... Either way, thank you for the the story, Crab man. Please get some well deserved rest.

[@mpo48]

dnd is a game for degenerates and creepes only it seems, i thought it was about storytelling.

[@lobokujo7825]

@@mpo48 It is a game of storytelling. And it is for everyone. Unfortunately, a consequence of being an inclusive and accessible hobby is that it also has a higher chance of attracting creeps and losers. But from my experience, and I fully understand this is just my very limited view, DnD and TTRPGs are wonderful hobbies 90% of the time, that lets you enrich your relationships with so many wonderful people. Don't let cringe outliers like these fools discourage you from trying it if you haven't already.

[@adelaideemiliem2772]

Yeah. I’m always hesitant of places that are welcoming and inclusive. Not that those are bad things, but I do think one can be too welcoming and inclusive, and that at some point people are just going to be pushed out.

[@Cesly-mo3uf]

They probably all fuel the 40 year old owners rampant alcoholism.

[@valhalanguardsman2588]

@@mpo48 they are playing wh40k

[@Calebgoblin]

I really started to get some "op is the problem" vibes as soon as they started explaining how everyone around them was problematic

[@crypticwander421]

Thank you. I was worried i was the only one who thought so, but they seem to have a self victimizing outlook on things.

[@Sarah-oj7bh]

I got more of a "that guy is the problem, but some part of OP is reeaally playing into all this drama" vibe.

[@ZorotheGallade]

Yep, it gives a vibe of "Look at all the machiavellian scheming the problem player was up to, but I outplayed him!"

[@AsraliaX2]

Crit crab has been an a losing streak with these videos lately

[@Sigilstone17]

R8: everyone sucks here

[@Spudzilla5656]

It feels like OP, in an attempt to paint themselves in as much a positive light as possible, has left out or exaggerated a whole bunch of details, which would have helped make this story a bit less confusing. Maybe the advice of "Don't believe anything he says, unless you can personally verify it yourself" should also be applied to them.

[@tymoore2117]

Tbh thats most reddit posts on most subs, funny reads, only looking for upvotes.

[@totallyrealname6376]

Agreed, I generally get this feeling from most stories (considering we're only getting one side which is impossible to remove bias) but I rarely call them out. However when there are ones so obvious (such as this one) I'll put in my two cents. A lot of comments go over most of my opinions but I'll just share one I didn't really see others posting. A lot of OPs 'direct quotes' from others in the stories share the same exact sentence structure and vernacular as OP themself, making me think that OP isn't being completely truthful.

[@user-pu6pn8vt5d]

OK... So none of this story actually happened because you can't verify it?

[@jjoshwilliams9853]

@@user-pu6pn8vt5d that's not at all what they said but nice stretch there lol

[@user-pu6pn8vt5d]

@@jjoshwilliams9853 Of course they didn't say that, it's an argument against them. I said that. If you don't believe a part of this story because you have no proof that it happened, you shouldn't believe any part of this story because you have no proof that it happened.

[@Cornfiglep]

Honestly I was having trouble even following this one, it had very little to do with the game they were playing and just so much of drama that seemingly one guy caused. If "warhammer 40k" weren't mentioned at the beginning I wouldn't have even known what was being played despite how frequently "the store" got mentioned.

[@heatherharrison264]

I feel bad for the owners and employees of game stores. Imaging having to deal with this sort of thing all the time. It has to be right up there with being a bartender and putting up with crap from all the drunks. I'm tired of people using autism as a crutch so that they don't have to improve themselves. I was diagnosed with autism when I was a child, but a psychiatrist later questioned that diagnosis, so I can't be certain whether or not I am autistic. Whether I am or not, I had some difficulty picking up social cues when I was younger, but over time, I learned to work around it. These days, I don't usually run into trouble, but I feel a bit awkward in some situations. Even if you can't easily pick up on social cues directly through emotion, empathy, or intuition, it is certainly possible to rationalize based on the behavior and demeanor of others around you, and mildly or moderately autistic people can potentially be very good at that. The human brain is quite versatile. If it isn't functioning normally in one area, it is often possible to find a workaround.

[@zard5930]

When you were diagnosed as a child, it is most likely that you learned to cope and mask since then. With the diagnosis, you learn to look and dissect your behaviour. That way you hide the most symptoms of autism. Since your name is Heather, I assume you're assigned female at birth. Autism has an impressive amount of gender bias and female autistics often get misdiagnosed or kinda belittled by medical professionals, since the female patients have to learn to mask due to societal gender roles and the way many are pressured into them. If you feel autistic, you most likely are. Please do not let one or two medical professionals sow doubt in yourself and your ability to get help. I am sorry, if I came off too strong, but what you wrote kinda reminded me of things I witnessed as an outsider as well things I have lived through myself. I hope I do not come off as condescending, I meant it as a way to be supportive.

[@nephicus339]

yeah, I'm in the same boat. I often don't get metaphors or jokes, or immediately pick up on what's going through other people. But I also understand that people at a funeral are sad, hurting and need support. Or people at a party should be in good spirits and that most conversations will be light-hearted. Even if I don't 'get it,' I still understand it.

[@madisonm.4535]

This is long but it gets wholesome and might be quite helpful. Thought I'd let you know if you are a woman or AFAB, you may still be autistic, even if your psychiatrist is doubting you. Some doctors tend to doubt and question AFAB people and women because the criteria for diagnosis is based on male children not autistic adults or women. Autism in adults and especially women presents quite differently than it does in male children. So the diagnoses criteria and what parents and teachers look for as signs of autism is often skewed and biased towards boys. Which is why many many women and girls with autism often go undiagnosed and don't realize they are autistic until much later, usually into adulthood. Unless your psychiatrist is a specialist in autism then I wouldn't take their word for it. In recent years more information has come out and specialists have become better at diagnosing women and girls with autism. Doctors with older ideas of autism and who aren't specialized and up to date with the most recent information still tend to miss a lot of people or question the validity of ones diagnosis. Another reason for this is that autistic women, girls, and probably some other AFAB people as well*, tend to be much better at masking the fact they have autism and blending in as compared to men and boys, especially growing up. So you can get a lot of people doubting you and going "oh, but you don't look autistic" because they only have the one idea of this stereotype of autism. A stereotype that doesn't even apply to a ton of autistic people in general. This has been a very long way of saying you are absolutely valid. Autism is a spectrum. It looks vastly different for various people. I myself am an autistic woman. If you have any questions or are curious for where to find more information, I will happily oblige. Honestly, even if you would like a fellow autistic person to talk to on occasion for questions and advice or anything, I would be happy to send you my discord or something. I know I wish that I had had that sometimes. Off Topic but Interesting: (AKA I went on a tangent and not necessary) *Side Note/ PS: Also, for the record, I don't know much on how this intersects with and effects different trans people. I have not looked into that yet. I bring this up because someone's gender identity does correlate with the way their brain functions. It's a whole thing. The crossover of gender and autism is really interesting, especially in autistic AFAB people. It's a whole other can of worms. Slightly Random Sidenote: Autism is most definitely not just a collection of often shallowly labeled symptoms. Some of the way symptoms are described do the job in the moment but the criteria often lacks a deeper understanding and just points out differences, which is helpful at first but lacks nuance and empathy and positive differences that allow others to empathize and understand. For example, yeah some autistic people have trouble outwardly expressing emotions but for that they sometimes get labeled as lacking empathy or emotion. But that sentiment is simply not true because we can be some of the most empathetic and deeply feeling people, we just don't always express it in the same way that non autistic people do.

[@Maibak3175]

The owners should just ban the whole group at this point. OP already muddled things since the "nice guy" isnt autistic, he was calling OP out for using autism as an excuse. Read the extended post if you think I'm BSing too.

[@yippykiay13]

Having worked both in a game store and a bar…can confirm.

[@Michaeljack81sk]

Admins? Laywers? Is this a D&D club or a corporation? In between all the investigations, discussions meetings and other drama stuff i'm not sure how this group ever get time to play at all. Nice guy is an ass but OP comes off as having inflated sense of self importance

[@psychickumquat]

It's a 40K crusade group. Frankly sounds like it's very lore accurate, with them emulating the Imperial bureaucracy so well...

[@Fwufikins]

As someone with Autism, these kinds of people are absolutely infuriating. When I was diagnosed as a kid I was terrified that I'd never be able to live a normal life. I've strived for my entire life to improve myself so I can be the man I want to be, to prove that my existence didn't need to be defined by a doctor's note. People who would instead use Autism to deflect criticism and shirk the consequences of their hurtful actions make my blood boil. Reading through the comments here, it makes me proud seeing so many other people like me who share that sentiment.

[@buttssanchez6763]

Not for nothing, but OP here sounds like they're on a bit of a power trip. Speaking for the victim and taking actions against their wishes stinks of "I know what's best for you"ism.

[@stockimageguy8941]

He's the type of guy to wear a mask indoors and yell at anyone caught accidentially not wearing one because "muh pandemic"

[@KrytenKoro]

@@stockimageguy8941 it's wild that antimaskers we're actually murdering people with gun attacks and stabbings, and yet y'all are talking like people asking others to mask was the pervasive problem

[@littlemoth4956]

@@stockimageguy8941 First off, it’s Fall of 2022. This bs mask debate is over. Either wear it or don’t. You had absolutely no reason to bring this up. Second, no, that’s not even remotely the same thing. This situation affects one person. The situation you’re talking about affects literally every single person they interact with in public.

[@stockimageguy8941]

​@@littlemoth4956 I don't think it's over at all since so many people still seem to think that mandates are a good thing. I brought it up because of op's weird obsession with masks which I get it protocol is protocol but making such a big deal out of it is just absurd and shows the guy's power trippy nature. Your second point is a bit misleading too, it's pretty clear that "nice guy" not wearing a mask is bad but no where near the worst thing in the world. Maybe it's just me but I'm just really sick of the whole "everyone who doesn't where a mask and follow the mandates is LITERALLY EVIL" rhetoric that has actually done a lot of harm. Lockdowns completely fucked the economy, put so many people out of jobs, made life unbearable for many since they couldn't interact with their friends and family and it really hasn't actually done that much to fight the virus. We would have been better off NOT letting the government have the power to force people into submitting to such batshit insane demands.

[@SecuR0M]

@@littlemoth4956 The OP in the video literally whinged about a mask lol. Trying watching the video before commenting please. I would have banned everyone involved from playing in the store tbh.

[@garfjaconsen1161]

So it's less than 5 minutes and OP is already sounding insufferable.

[@ARL2D2]

How many toxic people need to be in a community where they need an accountability system?

[@LegioPanda]

Welcome to the 40k fandom, at least we have cookies

[@lowfrag2050]

Keyword - *WARHAMMER*

[@ARL2D2]

@@LegioPanda the entire fandom can't be like this, at my local games shop nobody has had any kind of row or falling out since 2019 where in an MTG game a guy figured out how to lower his opponents total health past zero into negatives but even then it was a 5 minuet heated conversation and then we laughed it off

[@billbills4083]

@@ARL2D2 my group isnt like this either but I avoid game stores because of people like this. Whether the op power tripping or ole boy is a certified creep or both, the latter likely being the case. Plus I dont want to smell some of you stank ass nerds, a shower takes 5 mins of your life, please for fuck sake clean your ass.

[@bluegolisano7768]

@@ARL2D2 congratulations, you don't have to deal with degenerates, bitchbabies and creepos, of which I count as being two but only in the sense of Atterax Memeing Strike kind of degeneracy while unironically playing Wisp for reasons beyond the horny shit. also I just realized that autocorrect recognizes 'unironically' as a mispelling of 'unironic ally' and then further returns 'no replacements found' for the word 'unironic.' clearly thirty trillion IQ word processing systems are the only ones allowed at iOS's neck of the aluminum plated overpriced hellscape.

[@donniejefferson9554]

I'm only like 7 minutes in but this group honestly sounds painful to deal with. It's just a constant stream of "That's a long and terrible story that we won't go into detail about." It can't possibly be fun to deal with all of this

[@ShiryuCain]

OP is telling us half the story and this half is sufficient to ask them what the fuck they are doing. If the nice guy is really like that, ban him, block him and call the fucking police, do not engage in weird powerplay while letting him run amok. "everyone gets a chance" my ass. OP is the facilitator in that case!

[@taylorlee7154]

Not gonna lie I was waiting for the police to be called. If the "nice guy" was as bad as op said in the story with the harassment, death threats, and gaslighting you would think someone from the store or op themself would call the police. Something is not right with this story.

[@ShiryuCain]

@@taylorlee7154 I do think we are missing a bit of the story... And OP might be covering something. Hell i'm not defending the nice guy, the dude seems like a full diaper of a man and he can go fuck himself for all I care, I've kicked people from my games for way less than this travesty of a situation. But yeah... Maybe i'm just getting riled up because this seems like the persons involved are from my country and I have known one or two persons that could fit the bill for the parties involved in this story...

[@kyriss12]

The whole group came across as a bunch of self important mellow dramatic fart sniffers. If I had to sit in the table next to them I’d probably have leave.

[@Maibak3175]

@@taylorlee7154 whoa whoa whoa whoa......Where were there death threats, or any physical violence threats? That would change my entire opinion here.

[@taylorlee7154]

@@Maibak3175 the residential nice guy was calling and threatening the store and was dming OP threats if i read correctly. OP said that if things go overboard that they would call the police, throughout the story imo the OP made it seem like the dude was going overboard with the harassment and threats. If threats and harassment was as that bad I would expect "we called the cops" to follow up.

[@flamestoyershadowkill6400]

a few good rules from the table -no victim shielding -no culty shit -no fetishism -no ideologue bullshit -read the room (account for what the other players want) -explain rules and intent for campaign ahead of time.

[@Slendysis]

"no ideologue bullshit" What does this mean?

[@Grabthar191]

What do you mean by culty? Do you mean actual cult occultism, or religious stuff, or do you mean something like Manga fan boys?

[@Mediados]

I always feel like 90% of the problems in D&D can be avoided with a Session 0. It doesn't mean you don't get to play at all that day, but the lines must be drawn clearly.

[@kalamir93]

"Fetishism if everyone on the table is okay with" would be a much more positive formulation. I think your exclusion sounds like "fetish bad!" and that would be... unpleasant. And by the way, what do you mean with "victim shielding"?

[@thisusernameisalreadytaken5132]

Wow, everyone here is misunderstanding your comment. This stuff can be in the game, like cults and fetishes sure, but talk about fetishes at least and make sure you're at the right game to be using them, and make sure your cults aren't just a 2P recolor of a actual faith(most people don't care if it is tbf, but if you want to avoid IRL stuff then make sure it's different), and above all, no real life politics UNLESS you're playing a historical game in which these topics will pop up.

[@SuperSephiroth13]

Ok Im calling it. The drama that got all these people banned from the other store had something to do with “victim girl” having a crush on the married guy. Im thinking delusions of the guy liking her back, because he was being friendly and probably escalated into creepy behaviour and harassment. “That guy” used her delusions to manipulate her by lying to her about him actually faking the whole thing because of his wife and that married guy actually liked her too. How that was supposed to get him laid? No idea

[@Sherrif_Frog]

As someone with autism, usually I'll try to use it sparingly, either as a punch line (for example when making a joke about my special interests) or when I genuinely need to use it as justification for something(like when I misuse my tone when saying something) never once have I ever used it to justify recording someone without permission or to be a Nice Guy, and I sincerely hope no one I know does the same

[@gavinbrown216]

Yup, I also have autism, and the only thing that I have used it as an excuse for is interrupting people, this is a completely different level and is not okay in the slightest.

[@jakerockznoodles]

Another acceptable use is for winding up obnoxious pushy salespeople who approach you in the street. Deliberately taking everything they say literally just to annoy them is the best 😆

[@kanick1983]

This story stinks of stupid teenager BS drama from all participants .....

[@Maibak3175]

Its either BS teenage drama, or OP is "embellishing" things in their favor. Nothing about this made sense until I started reading into it further. Like how OP and "victim" were both dating store owner.

[@phosspatharios9680]

Yeah. It felt like this to me too. Specially with OP being so vague about what the guy said, and OP assuming that the girl was being gaslit just because she didn't automatically hate a person that was acting in a way they don't accept. I think OP was making the grave mistake of committing a case of "They go low, we go high". This is a sign of immaturity and inability to apply nuance to moral reasoning

[@CowboyCookhouse]

I 1000% agree. They say several times they did absolutely nothing wrong

[@marybdrake1472]

Sisters, nothing gets me to go to the highest level of super saiyan pissed off than when someone tries to use Autism as a crutch for bad behavior. I have had to deal with this personally, and being autistic myself, it's genuinely offensive. I have said this before, Autism does not excuse bad behavior. When you're on the high functioning end, you are responsible for what you do. Period. I agree though, this does sounds like something out of Game of Thrones, from what little I know about it.

[@Exeternal_Beyonder_Of_Doomsday]

I know and unfortunately from anything like Autism or ADHD for example get spoken of they do get Stereotyped and call it a mental illness they aren't And in Opinion ADHD is not Mental Illness because my brother is doing completely fine due to it and no he's not lazy which is a part of Stereotyping

[@pugking4518]

Same here I have my own disabilities but that does not give me or anyone with disabilities the right to be offensive sadly I have seen too many times people with disabilities use the disability card in this way and it always makes my blood boil to see them trying to pull this stunt on me or on others when this happens at my table I call it out for what it is

[@marybdrake1472]

@@Exeternal_Beyonder_Of_Doomsday I am familiar with this problem as well, and it sucks. Educating people is the only means of dealing with said issue though. Which takes time.

[@marybdrake1472]

@@pugking4518 Yeah, that is why I react so negatively to it. That kind of behavior just makes things worse for everyone.

[@Exeternal_Beyonder_Of_Doomsday]

@@marybdrake1472 a long time due to also other movies existing such as the movie being literally called Autism putting in Stereotypes

[@buckv9494]

This story is so fishy , it sounds more like OP decided this guy was one way and then drove dude out of the store and meta , all gas lighting and lies . Right into I am the victim here because of my "condition" . Crit crab you need to vet these stories better

[@DaWoWzer]

I can't believe he read this story and was like "yep this is quality, OP definitely doesn't come across as a sociopath"

[@briangang3977]

Brian gang, rise up and remember that these are seriously bad and scary situations. Also try not to manipulate others, because it's very possible to do it, even by accident!

[@mawmaw4410]

thanks brian gang

[@Trenchcoat3]

I dont know how you accidentally manipulate someone, pretty sure by its very nature intent is required. You can effect other people but without intent I wouldn’t call it manipulation.

[@LasagnaQueen]

OP is as cringy as the actual dude, damn. Not fun to tackle at 4am

[@dougkitts1056]

I might just be looking at this all wrong, but these stories always seem to have a history of drama before the drama. And some of the "admins" and "moderator" parts of the story remind me of 2004 chat room stuff. It's getting hard to give some of these a level of seriousness.

[@darklord884]

This story genuinely feels fake on some level, but almost surely embelished. Not saying it definitely is, but it very well could be false or at least partially untrue. That's the nature of online stories that can't be verified. Not saying you need to be paranoid but a grain of salt is a healthy spice.

[@deen7530]

I literally cannot follow along with this story. There's just so much going on I can't comprehend it.

[@pedrooginio]

I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of these stories were fake or heavily exagerated. However, I've seen some with my own eyes, so I cannot say these things don't happen

[@TheDukeOfDallas]

Another thing I pick up very often is from the beginning the OPs inadvertently explaining at length their personal Victimhood Complex that they seem totally unaware of. "Get off the cross, someone needs the wood" fits towards so many of these people.

[@Person01234]

@@darklord884 I don't think this one is fake, I think we're getting an extremely one sided view of it from someone who has a history of causing trouble and getting into drama (maliciously or otherwise) where "that guy's" actiuons have been embellished, many of OP's actions are being left out, but the one that that really puts me against OP is the labelling of the girl "the victim" when she clearly doesn't feel victimised at all. And their complete dismissal of her perspective because she's just thirsty for some D or something. I can see why this person seems to get into a bunch of shit let me put it that way.

[@FoxHoundUnit90]

Not gonna lie, this was kinda hard to follow but everyone in this story sounds like a pain in the ass

[@taffy6136]

This entire story reads like a load of BS, honestly. It's hard to follow, barely related to tabletop stuff, everyone is insufferable, and I'm left wondering what any of it amounted to.

[@CryWolf-sm9iw]

“I fear for my safety” now comes across as a cop out.

[@Cesly-mo3uf]

Looking into a "peace bond".

[@thatwaffleguy4958]

So I think I see either a typo or a contradiction from OP already: "We are an LGBT-exclusive group..." Then, not even a sentence later: "I try to be as accepting as possible, even to individuals I don't like, or have certain reputations within the various communities around the city. I believe everyone at least deserves a chance." Well, they either meant LGBT-inclusive, or are claiming to be accepting while preventing non-LGBT people from joining their campaign because they're not LGBT. I'm probably just nitpicking, but it already sets the mood that the OP is either lying or has occasional typos and can be misconstrued.

[@jordanpeterson5140]

THANK YOU! I was wondering what was sitting wrong with me when I heard it, I just couldn't put my finger on it.

[@ArawnNox]

I don't even know what that fact has to do with the story as the genders involved don't factor in it. I wonder if it was there as a virtue signal to make OP and their club seem more in the moral high-ground.

[@eflarsen]

i think they meant it as exclusive to lgbt players??

[@AAdams-ke4is]

I think OP meant the group is EXCLUSIVELY queer. That's the interpretation I had. Which then provides context for the "we're running a safe space here" thing.

[@TheBoshman95]

It's likely not a typo. That sort of doublethink is common.

[@totallyrealname6376]

You should do a follow up OP got exposed. She gas lights the other woman in this story and lies about 'Nice Guy' on multiple occasions including him recording her actually being a security camera audio recording.

[@mr.everwind5225]

Where's the post? Do you have a link?

[@michaelh9649]

Store should have banned all these children. I’m hoping they actually are children because that was ridiculous. The dude threw a tantrum because he got rejected, and even the “victim” of it didn’t see it as a big deal. OP was assigned a bodyguard because he feared for his safety? What?? Nice guy claimed power of attorney? What does that even mean?? This was so painfully convoluted and overdramatized, you were spot on comparing it to a D-tier Game of Thrones. Ugh…I hope the store owners washed their hands of all of them.

[@mrroboshadow]

am i the only one who doesnt feel that bad about that "victim"? i mean yeah the creep was trying to get in her pants (and lets be honest would have probably recorded it all since he was already) but lets remember what she wants out of all of this, a guy who apparently is already in a relationship with someone else

[@songsayswhat]

Married even. Early on the post mentioned a wife.

[@a-goblin]

you don't have to feel bad for her, but please consider that he very likely targeted and manipulated her bc of her desperation, to the point of isolation.

[@mrroboshadow]

@@a-goblin i didnt say what he was doing do her isnt bad, infact i acknowledged it as such what i did say was that she's not a "poor innocent damsel" if her end goal is breaking up a relationship (apparently a marriage according to a comment) cause she has a crush on a guy

[@Person01234]

She isn't even a victim. OP has simply chosen to label her that way. That's probably one of the thing I hate most about ultra-liberal American culture, thinking they get to dictate who's a victim and who isn't. The "victim" clearly never considered herself a victim (which makes me doubt the extremeties of the story) and took his side most of the way through. I'll state straight up I don't believe this is purely cause she wanted some married guy's dick.

[@Sarah-oj7bh]

Well you know, that was one of the things I felt OP was stating in a way that didn't make much sense to me. I'm not 100% convinced it is true. But it might be due to their autism that they just said it in a kind of reductive way.

[@littlemoth4956]

That first bit tho. “Hey, this game looks really fun! Can I play with you guys?” “Oh, sure! These are the times we’re meeting. Hope to see you there!” “Thanks, can my girlfriend come, too?” “🔫😳Your… what?”

[@thecreedbrothers]

"Everyone is welcome" & "LGBTQ exclusive table" do not work together, what the heck?

[@poisonerknight]

Little bit of a conspiracy theory. I believe the guy when he says the girl is a psychic vampire, just not in the mystical sense. Working on this assumption, he serves as a continuous source of delicious, delicious drama as he fights the playgroup over her like a fairytale princess. This is of course coming out of my rear. However introduces the possibility that instead of gaslighting it's a toxic symbiotic relationship, which could be even worse.

[@awarlockunkindlyborn1353]

I know you meant no harm by it, but autism isn't a mental illness. It's a developmental disorder, and calling it an illness implies it is something bad to be cured, which it can't be. I'm autistic, which is why I know these things, so I understand why the proper terminology might not be obvious to those who aren't on the spectrum or have just never been made aware of the difference. That's the only issue I had with the video. Otherwise, very entertaining. :)

[@lynxk9372]

Well it is something bad But yeah agree its not realy an ilness its not something you catch then recover like the flue

[@ItsCreaidan]

Precisely, splendid job with this comment. Here’s a W.

[@awarlockunkindlyborn1353]

@@lynxk9372 autism _is_ bad, yes, but it's a bit more complex than that. Since autism can't be cured, calling it bad can put negative associations on autistic people themselves. There are a lot of autistic people who actually take pride in being autistic, though I'm sure that doesn't come without overcoming great difficulties caused by the disorder. I can definitely say I would rather not have it, but a big part of the "autism acceptance" movement is to negate the idea that a person would be "better" if they weren't autistic. I'm not saying it's wrong to call it bad, I just wanted to explain the reasoning behind my wording.

[@lalas181]

@@lynxk9372 There _are_ negative aspects to being Autistic, but most of it (in my experience) is just from living in a world that doesn't really account for you existing. Being Autistic doesn't really become a problem for me until something like being in an overwhelming loud room or not getting the tone of someone's comment happens. Over-all, though, Autism is no more a "bad thing" than having a computer that runs on Linux is a "bad thing". It's just a different mode of operating than not being Autistic or having a computer that runs on Windows. /nm /info

[@ItsCreaidan]

@@lynxk9372 not really bad. It’s more complicated than that. It’s a double edged sword.

[@Grabthar191]

Autism isn't a mental illness, although it is a mental disability. I have relatives with autism, and they have quirks but it isn't something that can be treated like Schizophrenia, or even Psychosis. You can do therapy to help them learn to deal with the world in a more functional way. I have known people with Asperger's, which is a form of Autism. You can tell someone has it by the way they present themselves. They're rarely manipulative, but they do seem to lack tact, and social skills. They might make an inappropriate joke, or laugh at something no one else finds amusing. They can be fun loyal friends but they do take some getting used to. I worry about my relative. He's getting ready to go into middle school soon, and although he had a lot of friends in elementary school, I worry his new school he will suffer bullying. He has some real problems grabbing the proper words from the air to express events or what he wants. He mixes up the tenses of words, and does tend to stop and restart his sentences half way through. Which takes some tolerance to allow him to get through it. He also likes to ask unusual questions of strangers, like store clerks on when the building they are working in was constructed, and when the business was established.

[@susannahmitchell5558]

I know how it feels going through Middle School with Aspergers. It was rough, and for me personally, it was lonely because I felt out of place, but I had a bunch of support to help me get through it. From my parents, to my teachers, and a very nice therapist named Ms Krissy who helped me learn how to manage my anxiety disorder. I still struggle nowadays, but I’ve gotten better at managing it. I think your relative will be just fine. And if he needs some support? I hightailed encourage you to seek out some form of support, whether it be a councilor or a therapist.

[@qualitymcbro8452]

As someone with Asperger's, I can say that that is a real possibility. However, it dries up very quickly as people get older or (in particularly bad cases) become more wary of the victim, seeing as how they will probably more rapidly develop skills to if not win a "fight" (basically a play fight but with malicious intent) become very difficult to reliably hurt, whereas the people bullying him probably won't or have the autistic tier visuospacial skills to be capable of. Alternatively (and probably more likely) he won't get actively bullied unless MAYBE the primary target is off sick.

[@lalas181]

As an Autistic person (professionally diagnosed twice, if that matters to anyone) I have a bit of a quibble with the claim that you can reliably tell someone's Autistic by how they act. Masking is a thing, and the disorder generally presents differently in different people. There's also Atypical Autism, which is what it sounds like and often complicates the process of people getting diagnosed even more. The saying "if you've met one Autistic person, you've met one Autistic person" is a thing among the community for a reason lol /nm /info

[@fluidwolf]

As someone with aspergers can say it is really difficult to come up with the right words to express things a lot of the time. Especially in conversations with multiple people. It can feel overwhelming and stressful too sometimes.

[@WhyYouMadBoi]

Look up mental disorder and then mental illness. Its the same shit.

[@tawesssoabbox]

This is how one gets ones group banned from the store. Mostly because at some point the victims also cost more than they bring in.

[@KrytenKoro]

This is what so many commenters aren't realizing, claiming that OP must have "done something" to get banned. No, just being tangential to drama can get you banned, it's not like there's a court of law for this stuff.

[@CrispysTavern]

The title is giving me Airship Story flashbacks and I don't know how I feel about it.

[@Nyx685]

Heeey crispy!

[@HalfATaco89]

Nothing will ever be as amazing as the airship story and every mention of it makes me spiral even further

[@soapdood2085]

“We’re so accepting!” > has a group that exclusively allows in only an explicit type of person I literally hate the “acceptance” flex from people that run these kinds of exclusive groups.

[@username4735]

Who are they exclusive to? Besides not allowing the guy they banned? Edit: Oh I just double checked it and they are LGBT-exclusive. I thought they said LBGT inclusive lol. Yeah I definitely think that is shitty. Even pride groups aren't exclusive to members of the LGBT community because some people can't be out of the closet, and some people just want to be good allies. That just seems like it would attract gatekeeping and other bad stuff.

[@CowboyCookhouse]

As a bisexual, this is segregation and is not acceptable just because you don't like the opposite gender exclusively

[@CrytoZ_ButCool]

Starting to feel bad because I use to use my mental illness as an excuse when I was younger So this is how people would feel

[@thisusernameisalreadytaken5132]

We all make mistakes when we were young, ain't no shame in that fam. I relate tho, I had a lot of issues unrelated to my mental health but I used my illnesses as an excuse. Edit: grammar

[@deen7530]

Hey, we all did dumb stuff as kids. The important thing is you grew as a person and learned to do better.

[@WhyYouMadBoi]

You could say you were a critical loser ay?

[@CrytoZ_ButCool]

@@deen7530 yeah you’re right man, we all do our mess ups as kids, especially if it means getting validation from others.

[@taco3520]

more like critical winner, huge character development, good to know you recognized it and probably changed

[@voiddragonqueen]

definitely the funniest part is the power of attorney thing. because like 90% of the time, in my experience, thats literally only used to help manage health insurance stuff, bank accounts, pay taxes, and the like. i honestly dont believe that would mean anything to anyone else unless they were also appointed as secondary appointees in the document. but man, that poor girl. i wonder if they ever showed her the thing where he called her a psychic vampire, but i doubt she would believe it at this point. also, curious what the hell got an entire group that op was a part of banned from a different store, or at least i think thats what's being implied there? thats wild, but we'll probably never know about it.

[@justinbremer2281]

I was starting to wonder if it was him or me who didn't understand Power of Attorney.

[@evilsizer4428]

Every person in this story sounds absolutely exhausting.

[@michaelcosta7235]

This is just high school. In fact I'm convinced half of the posts, if not more, on this subreddit are just made up stories in an attempt to one up the other. I've been in the TTRPG community since 1994 and I haven't run into the amount of tools in 28 years of playing as some of these posters run into every 17 minutes.

[@jasonhopper2130]

This sounds like the person telling the story is the problem. You don't 'accidently' attract that much bullshit drama

[@chrismanaloe3507]

We have no idea hes even a creepy dude. All OP said was he didnt get the jab and he got a little mad when a girl came to his house and didnt wanna stay over. You don't know what they were talking about.

[@Fwoppy808]

i feel like everyone in this story is just a drama queen (did they even play DND once in this story lol)

[@Dragongamz1]

It was a Warhammer 40k group

[@jjoshwilliams9853]

@Alan Clifton that must be why they didn't play dnd lol

[@georgiots1409]

What a cluster this story is. I feel bad for the store owner and employees dealing with this drama. If I was the store owner I would have told Nice Guy he's banned from the store. I would have also told op that I'm not dealing with this nonsense. If there are any more problems then op's little group can do this elsewhere. Considering there was a banning issue with op as well there is a whole lot more we don't know with regard to everyone involved..

[@explodingtomahawks7589]

The people in that story were obnoxious and made it so much harder on themselves. The only ones I feel truly bad for is the store. Granted, I'm confused as hell at what the hell happened in the story and I might have gotten some things wrong but this was draining and I'm tired of thinking about it.

[@jazzycat8917]

I feel bad for the store owners. This is a mess, and OP is definitely leaving information out because this whole thing is confusing and hard to follow. What a bunch of children.

[@LimitBreakZero]

Most actual autistic people will use autism as an explanation for their behavior, rather than an excuse. I do have shortcomings related to Autism, but I work to improve myself on them, rather than use them as a bludgeon against people.

[@qualitymcbro8452]

For reference, autism is a syndrome, not a mental illness (i.e. even less of a justification for douche baggery)

[@Milkymalk]

"Syndrome" is just a term for "we know the symptoms but can't pinpoint the exact cause".

[@qualitymcbro8452]

@@Milkymalk Syndrome is a term for "we know the symptoms but can't pinpoint wether or not they're necessarily more directly problematic than just different". You could have described a disease, disorder or syndrome.

[@Milkymalk]

@@qualitymcbro8452 No. I used neutral terms, you coined "symptoms" as something negative.

[@qualitymcbro8452]

@@Milkymalk No. I used symptoms as neutral as well, hence syndrome was mentioned. You also used neutral terminology, but your statement was inaccurate.

[@rollanddev]

"I try to be as accepting as possible. [...] I believe everyone at least deserves a chance." (Is in an exlusionary RP group.)

[@Aryan-qv5qk]

Story is probably fake, doesn’t add up How did a straight guy get into this

[@c.h9976]

This story is weird and confusing, so much prattling on about stuff that op doesn't want to get into. Trying to get the story straight: Nice Guy joins group, Other Girl joins group, Nice Guy complains about Other Girl's behaviour in a game, Admins are friends with Other Girl and go on the attack against someone who has accused her of lousy behaviour, enlisting other community members to help make a case of hearsay instead of keeping it to the people actually involved in any current issue. Did I get that right? What a bitchy group of people. Nice guy sounds unhinged but op doesn't sound a whole lot better

[@rocketprime]

Again, I wouldn't really consider this an "RPG" horror story since the RPG is barely mentioned.

[@Micras08]

First of all; holy fuck that first story guy needed to get excluded no question about it. That being said, I always feel that these kind of groups have admin teams who take this shit waaaay to seriously as in them using all this time on making sure the ban is transparent to the point of upsetting themselves. Why do people do this? I have very little sympathy for them at that point tbh.

[@chrishusted9296]

So my only issue is, what was in the recordings? Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely possible it just incriminates him even more but if they offer a recording, its at least a view into the interactions in question. Though I guess it depends if your laws on recording are 1 party consent or not. Guy still earned his ban otherwise but man it was a poor call not to check the recording.

[@King_Of_Midgard]

the way i understood it, he only showed a minute worth of recording and said he recorded it all, using that as a threat to make gaslit victim think she did something wrong while at his place so she'd go to bat for him out of fear of the threat of 'the recording'.

[@TheMightyBattleSquid]

He had SIX HOURS worth of recording and only found a minute of it useable for his claims, which he sent to OP. He didn't share the full version because it would obviously incriminate him lol

[@King_Of_Midgard]

@@TheMightyBattleSquid Holding back the full version if it exists or even just claiming there IS a full version when there may not be can have the same effect in exerting emotional pressure on someone to help you gaslight them. If you took me home from the bar and blacked out, and I later said I recorded you doing some fucked up shit, and sent you a 1-minute clip of you saying something racist which you don't remember and then claimed there's another 3 hours of horrible shit and I'll send it to all your friends/acquaintances if you don't give me money, you're liable to cave in and send the money, even if I don't send any other proof I have such a recording. Its a natural response to perceived evidence of wrongdoing. Depending how vulnerable someone is, even a decontextualized snippet from an argument can seem way more world-shattering than it really is; emotionally vulnerable people are willing to believe they did something terribly wrong without realizing it.

[@CasualSteamGamer]

The OP comes across as a stereotypical redditor.

[@VenomGamingCenter]

What did them being LGBT have to do with the story? I don't understand why people write this in their posts. Is it meant to be some form of shield from criticism?

[@lynxk9372]

Just a comment, just some more info Same with it being a crusade campaign, dosnt realy give anything to the story just clarification And it had something to do with the story as in was being mentioned on the topic of being inclusive refering to the fact they didnt treat the guy diferently because of the mental disability

[@donut_42]

To answer your question: Yes.

[@Goblinni]

Okay so I'm seeing the whole using autism as a get-out-of-jail card is pretty messed up in it's own right. But I'm very surprised no one is talking about the slandered lady in the story. Poor girl was super naive to turn around and cling onto such an abusive, manipulative, and honestly kind of pervy man. Like in her own words and through the story's evidence, he basically deceived her into coming to his house to play a game, recorded her inside said house for numerous hours without her permission, tried to get into her pants, and when she denied him and went home? He tried to tarnish her name across the board, spent hours filling and spewing across her messages. Like think about how many levels of messed up that is, and how dangerous that really could have been for her. It's even worse when you think back to OP's first mention of nice guy to, when he offered for them to also come and meet in his home. Still can't wrap my head around how absurd that is, but sadly some people are just that way.

[@yourface2464]

This story is so obviously fake and embellished and full of drama, it's horrible. I've never seen a story that's made me dislike nearly everyone involved so much before.

[@dylankebabking4056]

I’m autistic…and I’m pretty sure autism doesn’t make people manipulative and creepy, nor does it excuse that kind of behavior.

[@professorsponge1554]

wait. a TTRPG Warhammer 40k group in a brick and mortar store, that's exclusively LGBT+ but says they're 'accepting' and 'everyone deserves a chance.' I'm not buying this one. Already there's a ton of red flags in this first minute. First, we have a fraction of gamers at a LGS playing 1 game, those who participate in this TTRPG element, and these players are all exclusively LGBT. that's a niche of a niche of a niche. Maybe 5 people max. But then OP says they are accepting but they chose to exclude people who aren't LGBT. If OP said 'we also happen to be all LGBT' I might have over looked it but 'exclusively' means they don't allow other players to participate. It could be poor word choice but I see no reason to doubt OP chose this word intentionally. Second; gaming groups that run prizes with money? nah. I can't see any legit LGS getting away with this. other points: OP needlessly telling us about when s/he got its shots, remembering things a little too clearly, a few too many details for it to be from memory... this story is FAKE with big bold red letters.

[@justinwatts4476]

Yeah the excluding of anyone not last of the lgbt stuff definitely is a red flag

[@dandelion_16]

to exist exclusively out of ... can also be used to just say 'to exist only out of" I think, but I might be wrong there. I think OP ment to say they try to be open and accepting to other people in general and mentioned this to anticipate lash back for talking negatively about a neurodivergent person. There is a huge difference between accepting people/the way they exist and inviting everyone to your hobbies. It is possible they made their group LGBTQ+ exclusive to avoid harrassment based on this aspect of their identity.

[@yourface2464]

Indeed, always amazes me how people give stories like this the time of day. There are so many red flags that you'd think we're in china

[@RainyGutters]

Lol. Think they meant LGBT inclusive.

[@Milkymalk]

Stating "we are LGBT-inclusive" always sounds like the default was having a sign up that says "no gays lol". I don't get why people have to make an issue out of this. If you want to play Warhammer with me I don't care who you screw or what you believe yourself to be. Don't be an asshole and know the rules or at least be ready to learn them, is all I expect from you.

[@ludovicschneider6190]

Had to listen to that twice, and still don't know who's supposed to be the "villain"

[@mikeydubbs8565]

OP: we are an LGBT exclusive group Also OP: I try to be as accepting as possible Except for accepting the straights, though, right? Exclusive literally means you are actively excluding people

[@hostiledodo1150]

As someone with autism, it sickens me to my core when people try to use theirs as a justification for their poor behavior. Despicable.

[@Nortarachanges]

I never thought about that with the discussing red flags thing. I ask all my friends to please explain clearly to me when I have done something to make them uncomfortable because I have very little experience. I’m doing the friend thing off of YA lit and kids cartoons, so any problems are for sure something I want a chance to learn from, apologize for, and fix

[@trekris]

Not gonna lie, that story was hard to follow.

[@SentinelAntioch]

Wait hold on. How can you be “as inclusive as possible” but exclusively cater to LGBT?

[@leecoffill8425]

That story was really tough to follow and I got a few weird vibes from all of the people involved, including the OC. Remember that in these stories, we're only hearing one, biased version of what happened.

[@bsseb2914]

This just sounds like a group of utterly pathetic people inventing drama. Everyone's mentally ill, everyone's an admin, mod, organizer, pillar of the community etc and banning someone somehow still takes weeks. The people I feel sorry for is the store, because they have to deal with both sides of this.

[@NerdGuy1988]

I have a brother in law who was a mostly fully functional adult. Then he got diagnosed with autism. At that point he mostly shut down. He needed help with everything from making his own plates of food to not being able to wash himself properly forcing his wife to get into the shower to make sure he washes. I HATE people that use their diagnosis as an excuse for their crappy behavior.

[@godzblade]

Was this a ttrpg story or a highschool emo kid drama?

[@AM-yk5yd]

Feels like highschool emo kid drama. It has more parts: two updates by OP, then another post by "victim" who also made several giant comments in one of the post how OP slanders nice guy and OP knows nothing about him and I stopped reading. I wrote "victim" in quotes because after reading one giant paragraph of "victim" I didn't notice much change in wall-of-text writing style. Also latest post author made was "How do you split chapters?" in /r/eroticaauthors and OP had half of dozens other posts in /r/critcrab. So either OP is a horror magnet or uses reddit as creative writing ground.

[@marielistopad1512]

This story is just too complicated. It is early morning for me also.

[@femboygaming64]

this genuinely sounds like someone I used to know. after being in an autism specialist school for about two years I can confidently say that irl main character syndrome and thinking you can get away with anything are unfortunately common traits. by no means is it a more often trait to have than not, most are alright, some really nice, but of the bad apples in there, they're seriously rottwn

[@colton72395]

Unvaccinated should never be a issue at a stone I work with over : 5000 people and ever ever got sick I got no vaccinations and I’m every healthy

[@notusingmyname4791]

so... where's the DnD in this DnD story?

[@novanppp]

"I try to be as accepting as possible" "LGBT exclusive group".... Come again?

[@Halloweenowl]

*Immediately sees clip of Steamed Hams* I can already tell this is gonna be good...

[@epicmelonman]

this story is a beautiful example of why i keep the warhammer community away the fuck from me

[@cosmicspacething3474]

As someone with Aspergers myself, I’ve done some really stupid stuff when I’m not in the right state of mind, but at least I know it’s stupid.

[@alexi4829]

ok I'm at the point about OP being autistic and I just... You can't go using *other people's autism* (or indeed any mental condition, disability, etc) to defend or excuse *your actions!* that's exactly the thing an old manager of mine did that made me resent him to the point I would call in sick if I was on the same shift as him. I have since quit (many years ago at this point) and in my resignation I told the manager to his face how I felt about him - for the record; there was *a lot* of issues I had with that job, to the point I have full panic attacks at the prospect of applying for work, good times...

[@hawthoneygarbage]

This is before watching the video, (trust me, I will) but as someone who does have autism, I warn people before I get into a campaign of dnd, as to show, "Hey, please don't be immediately agro when I mess up, I don't understand your immediate social ques, just guide me into the right choices!" But I never use it as why you shouldn't be mad at me when I do mess up, I mostly just don't want you to immediately start yelling, not saying this person was in the right, it's horrible to use a mental issue as a scape goat for horrible decisions.

[@hawthoneygarbage]

Yeah, dudes a dick, sometimes people can get overwhelmed and have a breakdown but, for that???? Yikes bud, dick move.

[@vincentstuart9562]

For some reason, reading the title reminded me of the time I had told the DM for a group I was invited to join that I have epilepsy, so don't be made if it takes me more than a couple seconds to do anything (seriously, there's no real warning for seizures aisde from a couple second of this feeling of brain fog and then all of a sudden I'm in a position I know I wasn't in before). The campaign ended after one session because everyone got mad over the DM throwing a fit over me having not one, but two seizures during a combat encounter (I was the bard so I was the healer in that party cuz no cleric). I also killed the Sorcerer because he refused to hold his action so I could move before casting Wall of Flame (I had fire resistance but again, I was a squishy bard). Well I also wanted to move because I was going to cast a level 4 Thunderwave on the enemies because I knew they were vulnerable to Thunder damage.......needless to say the Sorcerer died because he did not pass the save and the DM used a no damage on nat 20 and double damage on nat 1 rule for saves....he nat 1'd.

[@foisopracurtir6389]

"Sorcerer died because he *did not* fail the save"?

[@vincentstuart9562]

@@foisopracurtir6389 I hate English, he didn't pass the save (he nat 1'd) edited original post because English failed me

[@jaydevile8795]

Ima be straight, from the start of the story it was confirmed there was a bias confirmed, and in a lot of sense, the fact that multiple people find someone in tbe wrong, still doesnt mean theyre wrong. I advise people here not to bandwaggon these stories and to always remind yourself that theres 2 sides of a story n even knowing both, means you still cant judge on it. Quite frank its a lesson to all, and I want to add ive seen some very destructive autistic people, that really dont deserve an excuse for their behavior. So dont let anyone ever sell you that nonsense either.

[@conit4125]

I'd argue there's a 3rd side to this which is CritCrab's narration. I think his criticism of OP changed how people saw the story, and whether or not the criticism is justified I think people should be aware of how it might change their perception of the situations.

[@dandelion_16]

As some people have already pointed out autism is not a mental illness, but a form of neurodivergency (sometimes also referred to as disorder). This distinction is important to make as an illness is something that typically/theoretically can be cured, or is seen as a non-inherent part of a person whereas autism cannot be cured and is an inherent part of those on the spectrum (the autism spectrum that is). I'm pretty sure you did not use the wrong term on purpose, but it is not the first time you've used inaccurate wording, so it might be worth it to pay more attention to that, otherwise great video and insightful commentary as always Crit! (and yeah, sorry if that last parts sound belittling, it's ment to be just a piece of feedback and idk better words to put it in) EDIT: see you changed in the description, thank you! ^_^

[@starbird3939]

Yeah. I am a little sus by the OP. You don’t get banned unless you did something fucked. Plus, them going “we’re lgbt friendly” to “i try to tolerate it” is a red flag. Also, you have a potential sex pest trying to cause trouvle and you don’t warn your players, even when they ask, risking their safety despite worrying for their safety? It sounds like a bunch of those fucking players having a power struggle and the gamestore and players are being pulled along for the ride.

[@RainyGutters]

She's a Bisexual Trans woman... Pretty sure shes accepting of LGBT people. She meant accepting of quirks and odd behaviors

[@starbird3939]

@@RainyGutters Ahhh. I still think she is sus though for everything else.

[@savagedirk9267]

I can remember when people would play games and just have fun. Nowadays it seems like everyone has issues, broken, babies or just plain PITA. Exhausting…

[@dudeadonaiski]

"I'm accepting" "everyone deserves a chance" but "LGBTQ exclusive" What?

[@maranocna2530]

Ever heard of safe space?

[@TsukiStuffs]

​@@maranocna2530so what if i made a safe space for exclusively white people

[@Trenchcoat3]

@@maranocna2530 You can have your safe space, just dont lie and call it inclusive 😂

[@maranocna2530]

@@Trenchcoat3 Who is calling it inclusive?

[@WladcaPodziemia]

That's why many dMs and admins refuse to get involved in any kind of player-drama and private stuff...