Entitled Family TRESPASSED On Our Property So We Got Our Own Back r/AITA

[@rossvegas1346]

“What we did was rude and immature” you know what else is rude and immature? Trespassing on private property and refusing to leave when asked to do so

[@HidForHG]

But how dare they do things to make the trespassers upset. Don't they know it was just for ____ reason. They should be able to do whatever they want whenever they want bc it's for _____ reason. (/s for the people that can't understand basic sarcasm)

[@gaxalee7392]

I love Mark’s take on pregnancy and love. Like he said, there’s no correlation between loving your kids and the pregnancy itself. If there was a correlation then fathers couldn’t love their kids, no one could love foster/adopted/step kids, and the relationship between mother and child would be damaged by premature birth(because they wouldn’t serve the full term).

[@lily-zg6io]

Couldn't be more right!

[@nancyjay790]

I fear it's part of the assumption that women immediately will be engrossed in the notion of being a stay-at-home mother and that pregnancy will be completely thrilling due to having a child. I have heard people argue that having pain relief during delivery means that the mother "hasn't bonded" with her baby. Why on earth would being in agony make a woman love her baby more? And this paranoia about how if a woman goes back to work after giving birth is somehow the worst-- GRRRR!

[@HidForHG]

@@nancyjay790 ...that kind of stuff comes from people who have romanticized the concept of pumping out babies to indoctrinated levels. Then get angry that others are not the same fanatical insane as them. Who in their right mind would WANT to go through all that suffering if it could be avoided, other than masochists.

[@maleandrolemale9467]

Gaxalee: So true

[@maleandrolemale9467]

@@HidForHG Totally agree

[@owl7072]

Story 1: The only people who were being "immature and rude" were the people who refused to leave after being told they were trespassing on private property.

[@doraynesemik1378]

Story 3: I have been pregnant twice and the sons are adult , happy and married. I threw up for 7 1/2 months each time. If it had been up to me alone, the world's population would be shrinking fast. Worst time in my life.

[@kaykay8855]

Right. Loving your kids and loving pregnancy are two different things. So the MIL and other mothers are saying they love the symptoms of pregnancy and the the “joy of childbirth” which is the different for every woman.

[@suzannesamocki1639]

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[@MsUnamusedNerd]

STORY 1: NTA, they trespassed on your property. Trespassers don’t get any sort of respect or accommodation when their presence is not wanted and a guy completely disrespecting the homeowners wishes for them to leave. STORY 2: *NTA* It really sucks she lost her child, but she has no right to claim her affair partners/another woman’s sons as “her boys“ These are children they’re not emotional support animals to help you through a grieving process. The fact of those boys were being pressured to call the other woman Mom. That is not cool. Not to trying to get OP to take in their other two kids. She’s not obligated to do anything for them. STORY 3: *NTA* She has no right to push her hardships onto other people as a means of changing their views on things. It sucks that she’s in fertile. OP is allowed to have her views express her feelings when it comes to her experiences with motherhood. Those other women were being unnecessarily judgmental assuming that she has PPD and that she hates her children because she doesn’t love being pregnant.

[@amusing4me257]

I’m horrified of that woman who asks pointed questions about her pregnancy and then tries to paint her as a villain. I really hope it wasn’t purposeful and that she’s just grieving or something because that’s really awful if not.

[@condorboss3339]

First story: I think OP handled it perfectly. They did not threaten the trespassers & they did nothing that was illegal. They just made sure the trespassers did not get to enjoy being there.

[@leannes1083]

Exactly! And being in the south the trespassers were lucky they were trespassing on land that didn't belong to some gun touting crazy person who would have come out shooting after they refused to leave the 1st time! If the worst the trespassers suffered was watching 2 guys kiss and hear some explicit song lyrics, I consider them quite lucky to have gotten off so lightly!

[@mbyerly9680]

My brother owned a house on a lake. When someone would hang around the dock or come ashore, he'd walk down and act really polite then scream "Do you see it? It's a snake!" He'd pull his gun out and shoot into the water. Between the nutty guy with a gun and the possibility of a deadly water moccasin nearby, they'd usually leave. I love the green skinned "ooof" reaction to pregnancy.

[@ashh4929]

Oh that freaking brilliant! 😂😂😂

[@mollyoconnor9365]

Similar to OP in story 4 - last relationship I was in began around the start of COVID. We dated for 5 months. Month 1 he said he loved me. Month 2/3 we talked about moving in. I wanted to move out of home at the time and was convincing myself I was happy. Month 4 (? I think) he proposed - ring and all. Month 5 I broke it off bc our relationship was pretty unhealthy for both of us. Last year had a way of feeling longer than it actually was, and looking back I can't believe how insanely fast things were happening. I felt uneasy at the time but felt like I couldn't say anything. Op is doing the same thing. This is too much, too fast, and clearly her bf feels that way too. It also reeks of invasive and obsessive tendencies, and a clear lack of respect or understanding of boundaries. The kind of thinking op displays makes me feel gross and anxious for the bf.

[@davidponseigo8811]

My wife is a great mom but she hated being pregnant, it almost killed her but once each of our sons came she was great.

[@allisonwinchester3108]

Being pregnant, especially in the end or if you're experiencing some issues sucks farts. All I wanted was her out. Hormones don't help either. Glad to hear your wife and tiny humans are all happy and healthy

[@mothertrucker936]

Same here. I hated pregnancy. It was nothing like most women experience. I don’t understand why people are always trying to put a stamp on every situation. Lady doesn’t have a condition, only a great understanding with her husband. How wonderfully perfect.

[@latoyathomas6544]

I totally agree with the Moms as someone who has no kids! Mark summed it up PERFECTLY! What about any of that sounds like, YES! I'D TOTALLY LIKE TO FEEL CRUMMY FOR THE BEST PART OF A YEAR, JUST TO BREW THIS TINY HUMAN! AND YES! I'M SUPER EXCITED TO NEARLY DIE JUST TO GET THEM OUT! AND FOR THE FINALE, I CAN'T WAIT TO FEEL AS IF I MAY NEVER SLEEP AGAIN, CLEAN POOP, PEE, & VOMIT THAT AIN'T MINE, AND MY GOD... THE VOLUME OF LAUNDRY BOGGLES THE MIND!!! I could physically do the pregnancy etc. thing, but as I have a blood disorder, that I could not only potentially pass on, but that literally could cost my life, as well as maybe fingers & toes, or maybe more, & would worsen the severity of what I already suffer, I decided more than 20 years ago, that was NOT the life for me! Always super happy to go over & help my sis with whatever she needs! Love being the fave auntie! But I give it up to little sister every single day! Holding down a full time job, providing for you & your 2 little people, then you gotta come home & help with homework, cook, make sure they eat, keep the place clean, get them into the bathtub, clean, back out, dried off, lotioned, pajamaed, do something with hair, THEIRS AND YOURS, & get to bed at a decent hour, only to get up & do it ALL again the next day? And somewhere in there, the house has to be cleaned, we gotta grocery shop while making sure nobody gets kidnapped, & that damn laundry is building ALL THE DAMNED TIME?! (Can you tell I loathe doing the laundry with the fire of a thousand Suns? Closely followed by doing the dishes!!) Just baskets of NOPE! It's why I babysit for free! I in no way wanna add to her VERY full plate! And the questions! My God, the questions! Why is the sky blue? Where do babies come from? Why do boys have balls & girls don't? My stock answer is, "Ask your Mom." That way, Auntie doesn't get in trouble for saying the wrong thing(never know how detailed Siri or Alexa are gonna be). But Sis does it with grace & humor every moment of every single day! She's a Rock Star!

[@cheskydivision]

No one questions how much a man loves their children when they go off to work and do little or no child care. PARENT is a gender neutral word.

[@Mewse1203]

Stpry 1: was it petty? Yes. Was it a bit immature? Yes. was it deserved? YES NTA

[@mpmansell]

Not petty or immature. It was actually very clever and non confrontational.

[@cgi2002]

@@mpmansell consider OP said "were in the south" and didn't immediately go and get a gun, I think they were exceptionally reasonable and so non confrontational that it's scary.

[@eldiablopoco]

There is a problem with this story.1st we don't know what state they are in and how far the laws give them control over the lake. 2nd we don't know if the lake is 100% private 3rd we don't know where the source of the water is from and how the water rights are explained under the law; meaning if they are on a boat they may have a right to be there if the lake has a public access. If their feet are on the ground, they may be tresspassing; but if they are in a boat they may be legally allowed to be their. So he may be the a$$hole.

[@mpmansell]

@@eldiablopoco No problems assuming they are not lying about it being their property. If it is their property, and there is no existing right of access, which again it seems not, then they are perfectly in their rights to do what they did to remove them from their property. OP was not the asshole at all. The trespassers, however, were the assholes; for trespassing, refusing to leave, impinging on OP's privacy, and homophobically abusing OP after they impinged on that privacy. Given any one of those actions they were assholes, so, however you cut it, they are trespassing assholes. It is dishonest to imply anything else. Since they were on land,,water rights are likely irrelevant even if they exist, but since the trespassers said nothing about rights of way or water rights then, again totally irrelevant. If they were on the water then they would not likely be trespassing, but it appears from the story they were not. As another commenter said, they were lucky things didn't escalate. OP is NTA here.

[@eldiablopoco]

@@mpmansell we only have one viewpoint of the event. Here is the confusing part, "there was a whole boat load, 5 adults and 4 kids." the question is are they in the boat or playing on the beach. some people assume that somethings may be their's, not realizing it is not or they have no legal control over the area. I am a recreational fisherman and we must know this stuff. I know of a couple places in my state that you can only access because of a river or stream and as long as you don't touch the foundation of the lake you are legally able to be there

[@Lind5aywho]

The pregnancy one: I am terrified of pregnancy and plan on adopting toddlers because there are so many in need of loving stable homes.

[@andreawalker8343]

Hope you’re not American or are exceptionally wealthy :/

[@Zeracheil]

@@melodyharpole8272 That's exactly why so many need loving stable homes because they have been abused and mistreated. so instead of just kicking them back into the foster system and going over seas where they are mistreated worse we should be giving them homes and showing them what a family is supposed to be. Maybe once my hellions are older we'll throw our hat into the ring for fostering.

[@Undomaranel]

@@melodyharpole8272 LOL. "You may have endometriosis or have had a hysterectomy, have a family history of awful life/death pregnancies, I don't know I'm just assuming from what you said your fear is completely irrational (how dare you not share your entire medical history online for me to judge you), and if you're afraid of the dark you should never be around kids with trauma because you're weak." Love is what these kids need. Male teachers/parents help all the time and they can't naturally give live birth. The ability to shove a squirming baby out of one's vag has nothing to do with the amount of love you can give, the amount of learning and support you can facilitate, nor the amount of help one can give. Besides, your position has been said about C-sections too, but in reality that doesn't make the mother less of a parent. IF biological and mental maturity went hand in hand 100% of the time, I would stand by your second comment. But they don't. Animals get pregnant and give birth all the time, and we wind up with abandoned litters and needing to find adoptive mothers because of it. Humans, ditto. If someone has legitimate fears about giving childbirth but is willing to put in the hard work and effort to learn how best to help the traumatized and abandoned youth in the system, power to them (especially if I'm reading between the lines correctly and the OP is still young). Hard truths are necessary. But absolute beatings should only be given if you know 110% of the facts. This is the internet and you're berating a possible child who is mature enough to say, "I want to adopt," and instead of supporting by saying, "then these are the hurdles you'll have to jump," you're saying, "these hurdles are too big for you, give up and walk like everyone else". Grow up. You can recognize how impossible the hurdles are AND the biological reality of birthing without crushing an internet stranger... and maybe even help research how the hurdles are spaced and secured to help them in the future instead of scaring them away. Edited because autocorrect autofailed.

[@sharnadixon-scott710]

Not wanting to be pregnant does not mean that someone is mentality unstable

[@leannes1083]

@@melodyharpole8272 you seem to have a very dark view on adoption, I'm not gonna try read between the lines, add 2 and 2 together and get 5, but adoption isn't always terrible and scary and damaging. Labour can be, and is, damaging for some women. I had kids young, God awful pregnancies and crappy deliveries, so I knew what was what. Then 10 years later, now married and my (now ex)hubby suddenly decided he did want kids, 8 years down the line (after agreeing probably not is for the best as I had gynae health issues and am disabled due to back, hips and pelvis problems) and the thought of getting pregnant TERRIFIED me, on an almost daily basis. I KNEW what to expect, what it would do to my body. It didn't happen, thankfully, and we split up a year after stopping "not trying", but after the split, a freak positive pregnancy test nearly broke me, yay for false positives☹🥺😱 It doesn't make me a bad mum, it makes me a realist who knows their body. I just think crapping on a young women's idea to adopt is not helpful. Trying to be supportive, that IS helpful. I'm all for "devil's advocate" but telling her she's "mentally unstable" due to NOT wanting to get pregnant is just very very wrong. What if its a medical reason that she doesn't want the Internet knowing? We are all women, how about build her up instead of trying to tear her down? And no, I'm not in uber feminist, but what you've said could have damaged a young women's dream to help children in the system. Pushing out a baby doesn't automatically make you a mum. It makes you a birth parent. Being there 24/7, doing your best to love, support and protect them, THAT'S what makes a mum, and birthing the child has very little to do with that in some cases. I respect your views, but just ask that you don't stomp on someone else's hope for their future, for whatever reason you are doing it, because it's wrong to do so. Edit: typos. Ruddy autocorrect 😠😠

[@bridgetbenson6291]

Pregnant 4 times here and it sucks. My youngest starts school at the end of August and I am so excited to get a break. As long as they stay in person.

[@groofromtheup5719]

My wife became a substitute teacher when they first went back so her job wouldn't be a mess when they starting kicking the kids back home again. (they did)

[@shawnward7659]

My son is 25, and I still have flashbacks of 33 hrs labor with NO epidural. I hated being pregnant. I love my son, period! I never got pregnant again. Subscribed bc of your empathy. Mother's aren't supposed to feel like I did.... Ballocks! It sucked!

[@alichiawilson7307]

For story 3: people constantly talk about hating the toddler stages or teenage years. No one ever tells those people that they must not love their children or they are a bad parent or have ppd. Like really people 🙄

[@melanellie_art]

1.) 2:50 “we could have handled it better” how exactly? Waited the hours for the police to show up? Or keep poking them over and over to leave until they got violent? I think your passive aggressive solution was the most efficient yet non confrontational way you could possibly get those people off your property

[@flyboy1081]

Story 4, no one except mark seemed to mention that the GF wanted to be added to the lease! That’s a big doozie and can have pretty substantial repercussions for the BF legally if she were added and the relationship later failed. Seemed like she was weaseling her way into living with him and IMO 9 months of dating is on the early side to be doing that

[@songohan3321]

I saw that too. If you have to put your name on the lease then that is a huge deal.

[@rutyqutykandi1361]

That or she really is just super dumb. I mean they have only seen each other 4 months and she gave him her key.

[@KE-hr4sb]

I read it as, "If something happens and you're liable for a fee, I'm liable for half of it," not that she wanted to own half of it/live there. But yes, she's moving way too fast.

[@nerdy_evy]

Oh I thought it meant leasing the key fob and not the actual apartment

[@canadaiantenten]

I see what you're saying, me and my boyfriend have been dating 6 months and are living together but that's what we both where comfortable with (he needed to move across the state and I don't like ldr). Ops bf clearly isn't comfortable with that yet and she needs to back down

[@izzlebizzle9581]

Story 3: NTA. Being a mother is not a personality trait and you are not obligated to give up your entire life just because you have kids. Everyone experiences pregnancy differently, you don't have to love every stage of having a child to qualify as a good parent

[@Yuritsissymaid]

Story 1 and 2 and 3 : The entitlement is strong with this one. NTA

[@owl7072]

Story 3: Me learning about what can happen during pregnancy and labor and whatnot is exactly what led to me never wanting to get pregnant. It's *terrifying*, and while I can understand why some people find it amazing, I'm so sick of people glorifying it and saying that there must be something seriously wrong with you if you don't agree. You can dislike pregnancy and the baby stage and still love your kids, there's no link between the two.

[@maddy8328]

Ikr same, no kids for me

[@wolke1536]

Well I have one kid, had an uneventful pregnancy and hated it. The pregnancy, I love my child to pieces😂 but the worst are the weird expectations OTHER people have. If you ever DARE to complain the first thing is: "but aren't you haaaaapyyy?" Or beware a woman doesn't want children at all, you are treated like some horrible creepy thing from the swamp ( I only decided to have a child well over 30, I've experienced my fair share of that). My point: do what's best for you, if you don't have children that's ok too and it's not egoistic or anything.

[@wolke1536]

And yes, I also hated the baby phase and was happy to go back to work after one year

[@heidisease7120]

I have 4 kids, and the ONLY highlight about being pregnancy was feeling the baby move. The first year is hell, I hated so many aspects of it. I did a lot of it alone at night, but I would do it again.

[@renatatarnawski5974]

Pregnancy? TY but NO TY The idea OF getting pregnant ALWAYS gave me the chills! NTA

[@pastelbell]

The first story is absolutely beautiful. Yeah, it was petty and childish in the end, but did the trespassing family care enough to listen to them after a second warning? No, cause look how they acted when warned *both times-* they purposefully acted oblivious to what they were doing, even with the signs that told off potential trespassers. OP and his family could've done/been 100 times worse than pretend to be "frat boys gone wild." They could've been the overprotective type that would've bolted outside and charged at them in an aggressive manner brandishing guns, they also could've been the type to charge them without weapons and just start beating on everyone without a care. What they did was seriously tame, and- in all honesty -an absolutely hilarious comeback to watch if the cops weren't going to be useful.

[@momofboys6203]

I wanted nothing more in my life than to be a mother it was the only thing I ever wanted but I HATED being pregnant. I made it through my labors by reminding myself repeatedly that at least it wouldn’t be nine months. During my second pregnancy one of my closest friends was also pregnant she loved being pregnant but regardless of the fact that my pregnancies were easy with little to no issues I still hated it. That being said I loved staying home with my children while she couldn’t wait to go back to work. all of our children are dearly loved

[@wolke1536]

Oh my god I was the same, except I never wanted to be pregnant but accepted the necessity because I wanted a kid. I can't get myself to do it again, even though I love my child, he is a cool little dude and I am very happy I made the decision to get pregnant.

[@dianemartel5205]

I have 3 kids. The only good thing good about pregnancy, besides a healthy baby at the end, was not having a period for 9 months. The baby stage was no walk in the park either.

[@lynnw7155]

I didn't like my kid's newborn stage. Even with the second baby, I felt so uncomfortable with such a helpless creature who couldn't tell me what was wrong, heck, couldn't do anything. Not to mention sleepless nights (theirs and mine), etc. Doesn't mean I didn't love them...but I'd prefer if they came out 6 months old.

[@audreynothepburn7663]

@@lynnw7155 that would’ve been painful to birth

[@81babyruthluv]

He may get into a lot of trouble with the apartment manager if he gave you a key fob. There could be stuff in his leasing contract that forbids this behavior.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 3: NTA Who doesn't hate certain stages? Amy's comments are ridiculous as is pushing a diagnosis because someone doesn't follow your idea of what they think you should act like. edit: clean Champion is a saint...

[@likapikafika7196]

Story 3: I love my kids but I really hated being pregnant. I also don't really like the babyphase. You don't have to love everything to be a good parent

[@janicewilcox8590]

Am I the only one that thinks Amy was setting her up? Like that, in whatever conversation at work OP's husband mentioned either his wife is pregnant and doesn't particularly like being pregnant or that they have the agreement he does most of the child rearing? Sounds like she was trapping OP into saying it out loud in front of a bunch of "mom people".

[@amusing4me257]

Thank you yes I thought the same. Messed up. I get it’s hard when you’re trying to have kids but that doesn’t mean you get to punish others.

[@Coira2]

Story 2: NTA its not your job to look after their kids. I feel for the other woman, but they made their bed, now they have to lie in it.

[@crimsonbehemoth]

Story 1: YTA. Holding hands? In front of kids? They'll never morally recover

[@owl7072]

Everyone knows premarital hand holding is the greatest sin of all let alone doing it in front of children

[@catandrobbyflores]

How scandalous! Think of the children! The horror!

[@firerosenight6937]

SCANDALOUS! UTTERLY SCANDALOUS!!

[@faeb.9618]

how dare you not censor that!! the scandal!!!

[@donacooper4340]

Do not go to his place any more, let him come to see you, if he really wants to see you this might be a way to find out how serious he is!!

[@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax]

LOL. She sounds like a potential stalker and people like you are blind to people like that. The BF has done nothing wrong.

[@didyasaysomethin2me]

Story 1: These people were interfering with OP's peaceful enjoyment of his own property, not the other way around. It got them served notice and then evicted. That's how it works, folks.

[@Jadyra]

Story 3: Perfect descriptions of being pregnant and yeah, gone through it twice. You forgot though the kids seem to become telepathic just to puke on you just after you think about doing laundry since you're in your last (clean) shirt. Wait a minute and not clean anymore. I did have a seriously good laugh though

[@lily-zg6io]

Story 3: NTA to the moon and back! Pregnant people are expected to put on a brave face and always be smily and happy, overjoyed by what is happening to their body because a baby is growing inside them. Imagine having to go about your daily life whilst being nauseous all the time, having your back, head, chest and feet hurt constantly? And you're expected to enjoy it all regardless of how painful or uncomfortable it is. They're also expected to have their bodily autonomy questioned and privacy invaded and be cool with it, having their stomach touched by everyone without consent, everything they do from what they eat to how active they are, if they work, what colour they're painting the nursery, what toys they're buying etc etc Then after they've given birth, they're expected to rest (I mean I hope so), but you gotta keep yourself attractive, not letting yourself go, lose the baby weight quickly to remain attractive to your partner because it's not fair to them. The house has to be spotless even though you have a newborn to take care of when you might be recovering from major surgery if you had a c section. On top of hormones being all over the place, your body is changed, your lifestyle changes very suddenly. And that lifestyle is in constant change for the next 4-6 years with the growth of your child. Your parenting style being constantly questioned and everyone around suddenly knowing everything about childcare and wanting to take over you as a parent, between formula/breastfeeding, disposable or washable diapers, let them cry or calm them straight away, swaddle or no swaddle, letting them near pets or not etc... Yeah ngl I would understand not enjoying every single minute of pregnancy and the baby stage.

[@chulutheimposter5415]

Hello Mark!! I love that intro music! It's vibe worthy haha! Earlier today in my math class my teacher had a bit of a waffle about her dog escaping the fence and just sitting in the front yard barking lol, fun stuff! I'm picking up some of the things you say now lol.

[@haunting_one]

Story 3: Nah, NTA, pregnancy is garbage, and those people need to learn to respect different opinions

[@threeducks157]

A sort of amusing story, from my time in the Airfoce I had an awesome female superior officer as a mentor, he and a few other officers including me and pregnancy came up. My dumbass said "does it really hurt that much?" She got this huge smile and told me to stand up and stand at an at ease stance-its when you stand with your hands behind your back, and legs slightly spaced apart. Well she wound up and landed an abosolutely perfect kick to the nads that basically made my feet left the ground about 1/4 of an inch... Then she told me "about that much but for about 36 hours" there were no hurt feelings (just my balls) as that was our brand of messed up humor.

[@heatherholzhaus7013]

Good day to you, Mark! Thanks for keeping me sane during this year of homeschooling my kid! Thank you for all of your sacrifices. I hope you are well, sir.

[@roowyrm9576]

Why do people assume that a woman is automatically, gooily maternal. Pregnancy can be hell. Baby care can be hell. You can love your kids fiercely without having to be a SAHM.

[@rabeaw6646]

I hated my pregnancys too. I didnt enjoy it one bit. Well maybe sometimes when i wasnt throwing up. But i dont understand her or her husband. I get that ppl have to work to support the family and im not blaming them. But i never understood why you would want Kids just to hire a nanny. You miss so much of your Childs life and dont develop a deep relationsship. So why bother in the first place, these storys give me more of a "kid as a status symbol" vibe and i personally dont like it :/

[@ekjamesable]

@@rabeaw6646 I will never understand ppl who criticize others who prefer to work instead of being a stay at home mother or disagree with their 'moral' code. I worked as did my husband. My oldest is 31 and youngest 17 (in a few days) and we have wonderful relationships with all of them. I missed nothing of their childhood and when not at work our time was devoted to family. The more I reread your comment the more I find it offensive with the holier-than-thou attitude.

[@rabeaw6646]

@@ekjamesable so we we dont understand each other and thats fine with me. I personally couldnt live with it if my kids call someone else mama or i miss it if they start to walk ect. That happens plenty. I am planing to go back to work when the twins start Kindergarten at the age of 2 1/2. And according to my friends who work in childcare that is a good age to start Kindergarten. Both see the disstress it causes when Familys sent their 4Month olds. Some cant help it but they dont understand ppl who do it just to keep their expensive livestil (like flying for a vacation 2 times a year, buy desinger clothes for everyone or a new expensive handbag every other month)

[@ericaschaidt8588]

@@rabeaw6646 I’m curious where you live that kids who are 2- 21/2 go to kindergarten. Everywhere I’ve seen kids that age attend daycare or maybe a preschool type program. Though typically preschool is for kids around 4 and kindergarten doesn’t start until five.

[@rabeaw6646]

@@ericaschaidt8588 in germany we only have kindergarten, which has takes kids from 4 Month to 6 Years before they go to school.(Agedevidet of cause) But some parents give their kids to tagesmütter, which would translate to daymother. An everyone can be a daymother after a short training. They usually have up to 5 kids and mostly the ones under 3. Parenrs prefer that because it feels more like home for the kids.

[@clairebear-96]

Can’t blame op in story 3 for not liking pregnancy 😂 Nta, i’ve never been pregnant but it sounds like the most horrifying thing ever which is why I’m getting my tubes taken out lmfao

[@SheenaReine]

My first pregnancy was a breeze. But I gained a ton of weight from stress eating/trauma. The birth was long and arduous- 21h and my kid was born naturally 9lb5oz but almost had to have a c-section. Then my second pregnancy was a NIGHTMARE. All day sickness, vertigo so bad I had to take sick leave prior to maternity leave. I had the stomach flu on Christmas and then a chest infection. The day before his due date I fell on my belly and was rushed to the hospital. Went home and went into labour quickly after and had to go back lol. But he came so fast so less of a tough birth. But also I’m now permanently disabled from the second one it kicked off a series of events and I’m 1 back surgery in and dealing with immense pain daily. It’s not for everyone. You don’t have to love it, and fresh babies are hard and demanding. We have to destigmatize the thoughts around pregnancy and birth. It’s so problematic and leaves many people out.

[@marianhoblyn1901]

I have had 6 children, my first three pregnancies were a walk in the park. My last three pregnancies were horrific. Got to love all these women that are so judgemental.

[@leannes1083]

I think I enjoyed about 6 weeks of my pregnancy, after 3 months of nausea, I had 6 blissful "youre glowing" when my back went and I got spd. I had therapy for 3 months but can't in the last trimester, so..... total bed rest. Followed by a crappy 'assisted delivery', yeah, who wouldn't LOVE that! And as for the key fob parking story. When I lived in a block with key fob access, we had to explain to the office why we wanted another fob, if they didn't like your reasoning: no fob. And apart from replacing lost fobs (at a hefty charge) the answer was always no. Its a safe building, you pay for that, so giving non residents key fobs was a no no. I only live there 6 months granted, super noisy neighbours, but I liked the security knowing no one could get in whenever they wanted. When I visited (now ex) MIL, we weren't allowed to park in the residents garage. But there were parking spaces designed to be used for visitors as on road parking was a nightmare (was across the street from University and the residency halls) if he doesn't want to give it to OP, there's a reason, be it building/rent agreement, or he's just uncomfortable. Pushing it is silly. And who gives out their key after 4 months??? Eager much?? And nice to hear they've followed covid lockdown rules

[@deborahyoung1873]

Why do people think women should love being pregnant!? I love my son but hated being pregnant. Thus I never did it again.

[@littleolmee]

I completely get what the mom is talking about in Story 3. I was a SAHM for both my kids. Hated being pregnant & don't enjoy they baby stage either. Love my kids but don't come at me with a baby I'm not interested in holding other people's infants it at all. Beyond what those pregnancy symptoms are your body chances from being pregnant & will never be the same again plus you really are putting your life on the line to birth a child. Those women are all romanticizing pregnancy & children. It's a hard, thankless job.

[@steamrailwilly]

For Story 3, my siblings and I were raised by a stay-at-home Dad while our Mom worked as a Country School teacher.

[@Acidfunkish]

Story #4: The negatives for the boyfriend, with her name being on the lease would be... He wouldn't be able to kick her out, without notice, maybe? Though, she doesn't live there, nor is she planning on doing so. She has, and is planning on keeping, her primary residence. So maybe not even that, since she legally has a place of residence. The potential negative consequence to her would be that she'd be held financially responsible, if he couldn't pay his bills, or took off, at any time. She could potentially get it back through the court system, if she could locate him, afterwards. But still, this is a LOT to take on, for a simple convenience. Unless she'd be willing to go scorched earth to get this tiny token of trust, I don't see this as being anything more than what she says it is: a minor convenience. Because she's the one that could be left royally screwed, under this arrangement.

[@bgcorporation]

There's also the possibility of rent increase.

[@michamocha]

The concept that you HAVE to love pregnancy and childbirth in order to love kids is insane. Pregnancy and childbirth can be downright terrifying and horrifying. Mark hit the mark with his words and I can't agree more. Kids are cute but I dread the idea of pregnancy.

[@groofromtheup5719]

3rd story. What does it matter who says at home? I did the "Mr. Mom" thing for a bit. 2 kids was my limit. After that, I went back to work.

[@sammyk.6457]

Little story of my own to add to story 3. When my mom was pregnant with me I sat on her spine most of the time and now she has bad back pain after 21 years.

[@thistles]

The top doc at my hospital has a stay-at-home husband who watches their newborn. He brings the baby for her to feed during the day, but otherwise he does all the childcare. It just makes sense for them to keep her income, she loves her job, and he’s not a big career guy.

[@georgecharles941]

My parents bought land with 2 water-filled quarries in 1966. Over the years, we've had trespassers come on our property. They're told to leave, and if they don't, the police are called or they get threatened with real threats. When I was a state constable, 4 carloads pulled with 'urbanos' who wouldn't leave...when I pulled out my shotgun and badge they left.

[@warrentreadwelljr.treadwel2694]

OMG at the misbehaving young people owning the beach! I wish you had called me, we would have totally put all of them in daily counseling for their lifetime.

[@sallybruska3245]

I burst out laughing at the face on your avatar when you were talking about childbirth. I had 3 pregnancies and I don't want to go thru any more. I think men should help with pregnancy duties. To bad men can't get pregnant. Then maybe they would begin to understand why their women complain.

[@warriorcatskid003]

This is the earliest I’ve been to one of your things! Hope you’re having a great day.

[@AnotherLittleArtist]

Yay!

[@msredux]

Screw the people who thinks woman have to love every aspect of pregnancy, you can hate the process ans still love your kids

[@joanodaly4464]

First story ... NTA, terrible behavior on the trespassers.

[@akasha7819]

Ty story 3 I love my lads but hell pregnancy is the pits for me anyway

[@melansonwoitowich1462]

I love my children, but if I could be a seahorse.....I would. The last month of pregnancy with my youngest, my feet were so swollen I had to wear sandals....in March...In Canada.

[@katiekates4416]

As a woman, pregnancy horrifies me. I love kids and I'd love to have kids. But I'd be more than happy to skip the pregnancy and baby phases, where its nothing but pain and poop

[@Mew_Mokuba_Akari]

My oldest Niece loves her 2 kids. But she hated being pregnant. When the youngest was just a few months old I heard her husband was trying to pressure her to have another. The reason was clear. His brother had 2 boys and a girl. He ended up with 2 girls. She rarely went against him. But she stood her ground and refused to have more kids. I was told that she hated the feeling if being pregnant.

[@JayeEllis]

Story 1: NTA - You're entitled to use your property as you see fit. How did the girlfriend want you to handle it? She could have taken off her top, and clocked how fast the Karens scrambled to get the kids and hubbies out of there...

[@citrinedragon1466]

I hated being pregnant... probably because I had morning sickness for most of each pregnancy... and add heartburn for my second child.

[@Nikki_81]

I absolutely HATED my pregnancy and the first few months! I was on bedrest from 6 months on! In constant pain! Mucus plug broke 5 days before I went into labor, (women know what I mean) 37.5 hours of HARD labor, 4.5 hours of pushing. Rushed into the OR at 4am .... epidural done wrong. Felt the whole delivery and sewing/stapling up! All to have the baby dumped into my lap at 7am ... didn't even have time for a nap or recovery. All my family left as soon as she was born, leaving me alone all day! Lactate nurse never came, so I had to teach myself and baby breast feeding! My post op was horrible. I had more pain and bleeding then normal.... It was awful! Huge reason why my child is an only child! Even after 18 years, I will NEVER do it again!! I have my miracle baby, that is all I need!!!

[@missluciddreams3472]

Story one: NTA...they trespassed and got the consequences. Simple. Your property, your rights. Story three: NTA...I hated being pregnant...I love my children but I had sooo many issues during my pregnancies... including gas, nausea, bloating, aching, peeing on myself (it happened), dizziness, and just general shitty feelings.

[@nukerwolf7788]

Story 3) what the F? Why do they think? Comment section 10 kids and 19 foster Lol super mom indeed

[@oldwoman5942]

My ex and his wife, his kid’s step mother, were at a wedding that I was attending with my kids and they LEFT their two young teens there. I had to stop the girl from leaving to “party” with a bunch of adult men. I made the kids get into my car, drove them to my house as the kids had no idea where their hotel was, turned out to be in the next town. Next afternoon the ex turned up and when I berated him for abandoning his kids he just shrugged and said, “I knew you’d take care of them.” I was shocked.

[@rutyqutykandi1361]

at least you didn't let the girl go off alone like that. I'm sure she will at least gave memory of one adult who bothered to look out for her.

[@o0BlackSand0o]

I hate pregnancy!!! I've had people tell me I must be a bad mum for that and the fact I don't 'miss the baby stage'. I did love the baby stage but I love watching my son grow and learn more. Any time someone has tried to call me a bad mum my now 2 year old gives me a big cuddle. I swear he times it. It shuts the people up pretty quick but amount of people who judge me for hating the constant vomiting, the feet swelling, the pain, and oh yeah, the 84 hour labour leading to 1.5 ltrs of blood loss, and a baby born not breathing. Who the hell would love that? The end result was worth it but I still hate pregnancy. I had gallstones for the first one but my current pregnancy sucks as well and I no longer have a gallbladder so it's all pregnancy there.

[@OZARKMOON1960]

#1 - bro's GF needs to shut up. It's not her property and the cops were taking too long. OP is NTA>

[@egalitarian2207]

I am terrified of pregnancy for my own body. I’ve had a lot of surgeries down there and just having a balance in my life and not bleeding for literally 9 months straight is so desperately important to me. I wish surrogacy was more acceptable. Some women just love being pregnant and have great fortune in their labor. If I choose to have kids, I don’t know that I would be able to do it naturally. It breaks my heart though for the people that want to be pregnant and can’t get pregnant. But they can’t put their hopes and desires on other people, it’s unfair and leads to selfishness and lack of empathy towards others plights. Trauma is so hard. Much love to everyone out there, with whatever you’re dealing with.

[@egalitarian2207]

Just as an aside, it’s not to say that surrogacy doesn’t have issues, e.g. taking advantage of lower income women. But it is also looked down upon by women and can be judged really harshly.

[@Lithiel]

My Mom must be a rare ones because she actually liked being pregnant. Mind you, her symptoms were not the whole basket of awful ones you can possibly get. Also coupled with the fact that for a woman who is normally lactose intolerant, for some reason, BOTH times she got preggers with me and my bro- she could suddenly eat dairy again-! So she PIGGED OUT! XD "I ate ALL the cheese, ice cream and smoothies I wanted! and damn... it was good~" She's hilarious.

[@jackiewepps4694]

Story 1: NTA. They were given plenty of chances to leave and didn't. Story 2: Also NTA towards the cheating ex and his new wife. If her own children wanted their half-siblings over, then OP could agree, but only for the sake of her own children. "Nobody wants to help a bunch of assholes": Agreed! Story 3: NTA. People are different, thankfully. While my mom was the one taking leave when my parents had me and my sisters, she hated being stuck at home so much with little to nothing to do other than taking care of a baby and later including one or two toddlers. And just because you don't like the idea of growing a human inside you and don't want to stay at home too long, it doesn't mean you don't or can't love that human. If OP had said she didn't like her child and didn't like the idea of having another, I would say PPD, but she says she loves them both, so I'm not too terribly concerned. Story 4: YTA. While I can somewhat understand OP's anxiety about finding a parking spot, there are other and better solutions to the problem, like walking or public transport. Also, it is perfectly reasonable to be uncomfortable about giving your partner acess to your place after only some months dating. If it was me and an imaginary boyfriend, he wouldn't get a key to my place until we were living under the same roof, either if one moved into the other's place or we found one together. I also wouldn't want one for his place, as I wouldn't feel comfortable letting myself into someone else's house without them being home or with explicit permission like: "Take my key and go get the jacket I forgot while I get the car" or something like that.

[@franswey2]

He can pick her up and take her back home. He needs to return her key.

[@littleflame5530]

This why I love castle laws. I would come out walk my property with my sawed off.

[@damiang888]

Story 1: NTA, but only because the law allows it, I still think is shitty that some people can "own a beach"

[@charondusk5608]

Story 1 - NTA purely for one very important reason: If any of those trespassers, especially the children, were injured while on OP's land, OP would've likely been the one held legally accountable for it and open to being sued. Story 2 - Okay, this is NTA, no questions, but was anybody else unnerved when the garden tool "Wanted the boys around for an indefinite amount of time"? Straight up, that was a kidnapping attempt. Either they would've took the kids and disappeared or would kept them for awhile and then claimed OP "abandoned" them. Story 3 - NTA. If you're happy about it, great, good for you. But not every woman wants to be a mombie, jfc, why do people go straight to "GASP YOU MUST HAVE DEPRESSION!!!!!" if you're a woman and don't make your life revolve around your pregnancy and children....

[@Mewse1203]

Maybe the Bonobo will have to be a professional. Early again. Have a great week all.

[@JootjeJ]

Story 3: Mark, you're spot on! I love my children but pregnancy sucks BIG!!! Driving a number of times from Dover to Edinburgh whilst pregnant I got to know Every Single Bathroom along the M20, M25 (way too few), the M1 and the A1. My pelvis was dislocated twice and hurt like heck for over two years start to finish and I spent both times being a completely insane depressed psycopath. Oh, and my memory was more useles than a chocolate tea pot. I never did find that pink cloud my mother insisted was normal during pregnancy. 😅

[@loriwishman1866]

Parking Garage Girl, Have him give you a ride to and from his apartment.

[@CarinaCoffee]

Story 3: there's so much crap said around being pregnant and having children. Like, our supposed to love being pregnant as a person with a uterus and as a female read person you're also supposed to be happy to stay home with the kids. And even if people are less into those stereotypes they can still judge by saying stuff like "you wanted kids". People can want them or not or decide to have them after all if they fall pregnant, but in any case neither of the stages are all rainbows and unicorns. You're allowed to hate the fact you have nausea, you're allowed to grieve your old lifestyle, you're allowed to go back to work. And you can do all that and still love your kid. And for the OP in this story, they're NTA. OP and the husband made this decision together and it is no one else's business. Also about "OP has to stay with the baby because otherwise they have PPD and it's not ok the husband is 'made' to look after the kids" they can pound sand with that misogyny.

[@katiesmith2031]

Hi Mark thanks for the video hope your evening is wonderful goodnight and sweet dreams much love

[@allisonwinchester3108]

Pregnancy can suck. Especially of you're already experiencing issues. But even if your not (I didnt) the last 2 ish months are exhausting not only physically but mentally as well. You're losing sleep, your hormones are all over the place, you are never comfortable, your swollen, some women get hemroids, stretch marks, bloating...the list goes on and on. Not to mention all the people harassing you about the baby or what you're possibly doing wrong, treating you like a human incubator. Treat pregnant women nicer. Don't diagnose them, don't give unsolicited advice, don't berate them. Leave them alone or simply ask if they'd like anything.

[@SIXPACFISH]

1st story. NTA. I would have lead all of my people down to the beach and onto their boat. See how they liked some turnabout.

[@mpmansell]

Story 1: NTA. This WAS the 'better way'.

[@erikagehm2805]

Story 3 she's a naturally more masculine woman. Tons of women I know HATE being pregnant and the baby phase; yet LOVE the baby but not the work that goes behind it.

[@KCCAT5]

1. NTA. I woulda done the same. 2. Oh Hell No!. Imagine your husband's mistress asking you to watch her Devil's spawn children 3.NTA. you were asked your opinion and you gave it and now they want to put you in a box and label you because they don't like it it doesn't go along with what they feel. I know a lot of women that just don't like being pregnant they don't like how their body feels.

[@momotaro1236]

12:37 not just having to use the bathroom more often but if the baby decides to kick you in the bladder you’re pissing right then and there

[@fanendey]

Story 3: only thing I'll say is that... BPD doesn't work like that??? Damn.

[@moirapledger9153]

Story 4: why doesn't he come pick her up?

[@gina928]

Great collection of stories. I like the fact that you’re mixing it up a bit. Neighbors from Hell, IDWH, Entitled People. Fun!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Hey you yes you remember to take care of yourself gosh darn it, you are always valid, and I love you and care about you so please take care of yourself 💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@FluffieXStarshine]

I hate those motherhood is a woman's greatest accomplishment... my mom worked full time with two kids. Dad worked part-time mostly retail. So growing up i saw a strong working mum. Now my cousins all have kids and ask me don't I want any? Don't I feel bad not having a family? It's so outdated to expect women to put their lives on hold just for families.

[@evacelik8279]

the law is very clear of tresspassing in my country. You can walk pick berrys and fungus and flowers.And wood that has fallen to the ground almost everywhere in the forrests and medows that are not fenced. You are not alowed to hunt anywhere without the owners permission or and or a licence from the authoritys. This make it very nice to take a long walk or hike if you controll your dogs almost everywhere exept on fenched areas or .around peoples houses. This law is unique to Scandinavia and are called in Swedish Allemansrätten.

[@FizzledDreams11]

I’ve been here since this was daddy cringe and I religiously listen everyday sometimes... all day 😂 going back and finding ones I haven’t heard! Thank you for keeping us entertained with all the content! Sometimes when you waffle on it’s quite more interesting to hear your stories! Thanks again

[@ScooterBond1970]

STORY: "Hinky" MARK: 👀

[@Josku2411]

Ah heck i was a lil late but eh it's prolly excused if i was having a lil panic attack just like...lowkey

[@Josku2411]

But hey atleast i have a thick turtle toy to squish it's basically one of those fabric toys you can sink into a pool and dive out it's filled with something akin to sand and it works great as a stress reliever because it's dense but squishable and somewhat grounding as it's heavy on your hand

[@purpleiguana208]

I've been pregnant three times. Uncomplicated pregnancies. Uncomplicated deliveries. Other than feeling like a whale, stretch marks, and some stretched skin that will never bounce back, no big problems at all. AND I DID NOT LIKE BEING PREGNANT. I DID NOT LIKE CHILDBIRTH. I DID NOT LIKE THE SLEEP DEPRIVATION THAT COMES WITH BRAND NEW BABIES. None of those things did I like. And yet, I love my children, and while things might have been a little wonkus with my first child (which could have just been me struggling to deal with the sleeplessness), no PPD diagnosis. Pregnancy/childbirth/motherhood gets so freaking romanticized and people think they'll fail to bond with their child if they don't feel that rush of love right after they're born and that if things don't look like a freaking greeting card, they'll feel like a failure of a parent. This is all bullshit. Sure, there's nothing wrong with enjoying everything to do with babies and childcare. And there's nothing wrong with not enjoying it either. None of that means that you love your child more or less than any other parent. Parenthood isn't fun. It's work. It's a LOT of thankless, unending work. But I love my children and never for one moment could anything happen to change that.

[@TheMimiSard]

Story 3 - I can't speak on firsthand experience, since I have never had a child and have been told by my doctor that with my surgical history and current age (mid-40s) I should not get pregnant, but I feel like mentioning my Mum has expressed how, when she was young, she was never baby-crazy and even had people think she was odd because of it. I however think she has been a reasonably good mother, for a woman who has depression and spent a good period of my childhood as a single mother. I think her lack of baby-crazy means she has a level of objective sense that served her well as a mother, when we were young. Not being enthusiastic about parenting and pregnancy does not mean a woman does not love her children or will be a bad mother, and based on my supposition about my Mum, may give women a level of sense that baby-crazy mommas may not have. On the other hand, that comment about forbidden talk is not wrong, and talking about not being super-enthusiastic around someone who has had pregnancy trouble can be a minefield, but depending on how aware a given woman is of their circle of friends and family, it may be a minefield that takes a woman by surprise.