Future SIL Is Turning The Family On Me As I Won't Attend Her Wedding Whilst Heavily Pregnant

[@LetholdusKaspyr]

"Getting married to his girlfriend of four months." BIL doesn't know her yet. Hope he's taking notes on her behavior now.

[@bhutehole]

Nope he is a man in love. Therefore his IQ is reduced by 30 points

[@LetholdusKaspyr]

@Tiffanie Absolutely. I'd put some money on her handling those appointments alone, unverified.

[@kaitohkid7229]

It's called "babytrapping". But she lost the baby... and the wedding date isn't even set yet

[@Schaemia]

@@kaitohkid7229 meaning he is not trapped and can still get out. Hopefully he sees sense.

[@kathydurow6814]

Third thought.....run!

[@baskervillebee6097]

It would be worse if she traveled 7 hours in a car then laid down and delivered in the middle of the wedding in front of the preacher and families. 😳

[@demonqueen3886]

Then sister in law will be more pissed because the day of her wedding was the same day her niece or nephew was born

[@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258]

That's what I would do!

[@DrawciaGleam02]

If that happened OP would totally be justified in saying "I WARNED YOU!!"

[@tallyp.7643]

Honestly, though I'm sure it'd be a bit scary for her, I'd LOVE to see that. "Nope, can't move the pregnant lady. She's gonna have to give birth in the middle of the dance floor." And then watch bride have a meltdown about how this "brat" just ruined the best day of her life.

[@LadyJuse]

Worse...or better?

[@DemonicGoddess]

Can we say Projection on story 1? With SIL, "she is abusing him and controlling" nah SIL your the one abusing.

[@jvangriend560]

Thank you, was hoping someone would call this out. Extra one-ups for you if I could.

[@jackchop1576]

Pick me!!!!!!

[@tifadreamers]

yes, exactly this. I'm sure there will be more update in the future. she's not only projecting but tormenting OP for being pregnant only because she lost hers, so there's definitely a whole lot of drama still going on

[@ScooterBond1970]

If the name Karen ever falls out of fashion, we can just switch to calling them The Projector.

[@DemonicGoddess]

@@ScooterBond1970 nah, Maybe just old school name calling the person a Witch with out the W.

[@owl7072]

Story 1: Why do I get the feeling she'd expect everyone to cater to her if she ever gets pregnant and will have a tantrum if they don't 🚶🏻 If Op went to the wedding and her water broke, SIL seems like the type to scream and cry and accuse her of doing it deliberately to "steal her spotlight" "Op doesn't like me" In all fairness, pregnant or not, I wouldn't like someone who made comments at my _mother's funeral_ either 🤨

[@SuperBatSpider]

I was going to comment something like this. You’re smart.

[@dionysus_adores]

Gezz y does everyone like her she sounds horrible. Or is she just horrible to op?

[@kanelovec4315]

I let husband go and told him so when he miss his own child birth because he couldn't leave the wedding in the middle.

[@DrawciaGleam02]

Honestly, if that happened that might get the family to realize SIL is a bad egg. OP noticed signs at the funeral that SIL was crappy but everyone else likes SIL even after that happened. SIL must have a lot of charisma to get away with that. And sometimes the only way to to reveal their true colors is to put such a person in a scenario where their bad behavior can't be excused.

[@jakemarie828]

@@DrawciaGleam02 families usually cater to the selfish one in these stories. Guess many of us wasted a bunch of time trying to be "the good kid" lol

[@librarymousemama]

I went to a wedding at 39 weeks pregnant BUT it was 15 minutes from home and 5 minutes from my hospital. And I was timing contractions during the ceremony.

[@darkmask5933]

Something makes me think the whole "marriage" in story one was originally a shotgun wedding since brother said his fiancé was pregnant, and now that they are engaged she suddenly had a "miscarriage". While I don't want to downplay the fact she really might have been pregnant, my personal alarm bells are ringing that the bro should not be marrying someone he has only been dating for four months, and does make me wonder if there ever was a baby in the first place.

[@Chantal_P-v4x]

Story 1 - SIL is insane! Only seven hours drive.... while that pregnant? Sure, OP might be safe and make it home just fine to give birth a week or two later. But she could also give birth on the side of a damn highway. She always explained the situation with the timing and SIL choose the date anyway. To heck with her.

[@nikkiwhray1598]

I have a feeling the parents somehow busted the original garage door, and "gifted" the new door to cover their tracks. Either that, or the real intention was to help the friend out by giving him work.

[@jerrystauffer2351]

If figure it was a brain fart. It's almost impossible to break a garage door opener accidentally

[@kathydurow6814]

Any unexpected damage to one if their cars? Maybe they decided to take an unnecessary visit to "our" place, pressed the wrong buttons & harmed the car, threw or wrecked something so it needed fixing (mom, probably) and mom wanted them to pay the bill because it was "their" garage door lift that did the damage. Just a guess, the only thing that is remotely logical. Or not, they simply WAAAY overstepped boundaries. Talk to the installation company, particularly if you know the owner. He's the one I feel for since he possibly charged mates rates but won't get paid anytime soon.

[@viddergrapho8488]

Am I the only one who thinks it's more sinister? They probably have extra FOBs for when son and DiL finally cut their dumb asses off and change the locks on them, and they can use the FOB to break in?

[@raveniaelhoran2647]

I believe they wanted to snoop or something like that, because why they would change only one lift and why they would change the one which was LESS older than the second? It doesn't give any other sense than snooping around.

[@raveniaelhoran2647]

@@jerrystauffer2351 brain fart. I love this term.

[@Tammohawk1]

2. I can't believe those parents. The fact that Mom blocked him when he asked them how they would feel speaks volumes.

[@azuchan6079]

Story 1: did the future SIL not think it would be worse if OP's water broke AT HER WEDDING and STOLE HER LIMELIGHT?

[@Fete_Fatale]

She set the date deliberately so that OP wouldn't be able to attend, and she'd create a reason [in her own deranged mind] to kick off at OP and OP's husband. It was all manufactured drama, all designed to punish OP for daring to be pregnant when SiL had miscarried.

[@annabordelon6663]

Wish I had thought of this

[@corlenajames1381]

Story 1: OP, your SIL is TA. Your husband needs to shut their harassment down. You & your baby should be his first priority. This is the birth of your first child. Please understand that birth could have complications, including emergency C-sections. He would not want to be that far away from you, should anything with the birth go unplanned.

[@GBunnyG]

Story 1: She's going to have ongoing problems with that SIL. Story 2: I...what? I would never want a gift from those parents.

[@dancing0nthe3dge]

Story 3: no, no no. I used to be a paralegal and worked with these kinds of trusts. I don't think I'm wrong when I say that they cannot change that trust. All they are trying to do is create a completely separate contract. An irrevocable trust cannot be changed, she is fully entitled to inherit all of that and the uncle is lying.

[@kathydurow6814]

Just as well OP saw a lawyer as advised. Always helps to know your rights.

[@KCCAT5]

I tell people all the time if you have something to leave people in your family give it to them while you're still alive.

[@dancing0nthe3dge]

@@KCCAT5 yeah but with money you can't always gift the amount you want to give. There's a limit of what you can gift per year without taxes.

[@briansmaller7443]

OK - I really wanted to go to a school reunion. My wife would have been 38 weeks at that stage, I said no. And stayed home, And she was 14 days late...oh well. You do what you have to for your family.

[@AndyyWithAY]

If brother is cosigning on this, he ABSOLUTELY is an AH. OP told future SIL in advance when she was due and they planned the wedding for when she would be 38 weeks. Edit: Seems future SIL is doing this unilaterally. BIL should reevaluate this relationship. His fiancee is cray

[@keplersdream901]

He's marrying someone after four months, so he's equally unbalanced.

[@bun04y]

@@keplersdream901 there was mentioned that they had recently suffered a miscarriage. Perhaps the reason for the shotgun wedding WAS the baby, but now that isn't an issue...except that futureSIL is a bit cray

[@jaymel4691]

Marrying someone after only 4 months is ridiculous, I hope the brother is seriously rethinking that relationship- and making sure to use birth control. Sounds like SIL is in a rush to get him locked down and possibly baby-trapped. Yikes!

[@groofromtheup5719]

Fiancee's hatred for OP preceeded the miscarriage. BIL needs to put his foot down hard if he ever expects his stb wife to ever respect him. Honestly, this is "the wedding is on hold" territory.

[@groofromtheup5719]

@@bun04y the weird funeral comment preceeded the reported miscarriage though.

[@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258]

Story 2 - this is one of many reasons that I firmly believe all elder money issues should be handled by a lawyer not family. Had similar bs with my familyand seen it happen so often between working in a law office and a mental health care practice

[@Cel3ere5]

I agree with you. Ex nurse. Imagine my absolute *lack* of surprise when the damn doctor & lawyer didn't double check the paperwork for some really easy to notice, goofy errors that were there for a over decade. 🙄 I still wonder if they thought a nurse or a paralegal was going to appear in the middle of the night like an apparition and magically fix it or something. 🤣🤣🤣

[@kathydurow6814]

In some places there are trustee companies, government or private, that will take on administration of monies. Not sure about the US, though. And it costs an arm & a leg, lots of red tape & restrictions which can be good or bad, depending on the situation. I don't think I would like to entrust anything like this to a single independent person, I'd want a big entity insured against employee fraud and with high audit standards & accountability.

[@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258]

@@Cel3ere5 They probably did. There are reasons why in a zombie apocalypse you want the support staff around!

[@Cel3ere5]

@@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258 what are you talking about?

[@juanhaines7295]

Story 1 no doubt the Silk will continue to be passive aggressive even after the baby is born.

[@sister_bertrille911]

Apparently SIL in Story 1 has no idea how many times a woman who is eight plus months pregnant has to pee in an hour, let alone seven of them. No worries, though, it'll be super easy for her to get in and out of the car to use those nice clean gas station bathrooms along the way.

[@LisaApril]

Story two: this is definitely something that the parents would be forced to pay for if the Newlyweds decided to press the matter legally. And they should. Someone has to tell these two idiots that what they did was very very wrong and paying for it should get that through their heads. I’d be grateful if my mother-in-law like that so she was done with us.. also, they should definitely change their locks As the in-laws all have keys. In all my years of living I’ve never needed anyone else to have an emergency key to my home.

[@evarodriguez4319]

Story 1, she purposely chose time you could not attend. She doesn't like you.

[@theshadowofgod1]

Story 3 had me absolutely SEETHING! Child and elder abuse are two things that get me antsy enough to punch something. I actually used to take care of a lady who one of her sons committed financial elder abuse towards her, as well as neglect. She didn't have her medical needs taken care of, and he used her money for himself. Son who I came to know while caring for her, COMPLETE opposite and absolutely wonderful. OP should absolutely go after his uncle since WHO KNOWS how much more crap he's pulling and this is all he's seeing.

[@ddjohnson3961]

Story one NTA should of told the brother from the beginning before everything escalated.The SIL is a bridezilla. Story 2 NTA get new locks. Also don’t pay it and give the company your parents info.Story 3 Glad you got a lawyer and I hope you can report the elder abuse soon.

[@MiZZVMN]

Story 1: NTA - I got a weird sense of needing to be home when I was that pregnant with my first. Currently pregnant with my second and I'm already feeling a bit anxious. 7 hours away is way to far.

[@stillvisibletoallusers]

Same same. My mum called it "nesting". Which according to her is pretty normal. I didn't want to leave my home during the last month or so of my first pregnancy. It was just uncomfortable.

[@ginathecookie]

literally I've never get birth she said 7 hours me: wtfudge is she smoking, that IS a long way. even an hour or two is risky.. under an hour? ehh, kinda. anything over 20 mins not worth it and even then its up to the couple. its 100% understandable, and even expected, not to travel that close to the due date. SIL definitely high off her rockers

[@scarlettg.5772]

Congratulations! Right! I didn’t want to go farther than an hour away at 36+ wks. It might be a different story if I ever get pregnant again but I know I just had a fear of being somewhere and having trouble getting to the hospital. I didn’t have him till my due date so I was a home body for 6wks. I’m still a home body now as he’s 10wks old and have that FTM fear of taking him out around to many people and driving him far distances 😅

[@scarlettg.5772]

@@stillvisibletoallusers same, I nested hard at 36wks. I still don’t go far as my boy is 10wks and I don’t feel comfortable around a lot a people with him or driving far with him.

[@scarlettg.5772]

@@ginathecookie yep! Anything over an hour is crazy. I didn’t even like that I live 45mins from the hospital.

[@rachelschrock7036]

Story 1: NTA. I was 34 weeks with our first when my husband went on a work training trip for his new job. I went to my OB appointment that same morning. I was immediately diagnosed with preeclampsia and wheeled over to the hospital across the street. Thankfully the airline was able to work with my husband to get him a return flight ASAP. He made it for the birth of our son. Literally had no idea I was even sick. My pregnancy had gone smoothly up to that point. Anything can happen that far along in pregnancy!

[@bookmarkr7694]

Story 1: sounded like BIL's fiancé intentionally chose a date she couldn't attend so she could force husband away from BIL

[@cheskydivision]

SIL picked the date to cause trouble intentionally . Definitely have hubby talk to his brother.

[@SkyEcho751]

Story 1: Oh I wouldn't be worried about declining to be in the wedding, because after the stunt she pulled, the wedding might be on hold for a while. Story 2: Ask the Parents(specifically the 'Just No Mother in Law') to define the word "Gift" because if you read Merriam-Webster then you find "something voluntarily transferred by one person to another without compensation", note the "Without compensation" part. That is not a gift, because they need to pay for it. Sounds like the JN-MIL wants to get all the money that her kid got at their wedding. Story 3: Lawyer up immediately. Sue this guy into the dirt if he tries anything more. HE'S the greedy one and he is ALSO trying to scam money from OP due to his Sister's(OP's Mom) death.

[@scarlettaagni5179]

Story 2: it's not a freaking gift if they want you to foot the bill for it???

[@X2XImTheNewCancerX2X]

Story 2: NTA at all, but also, if the contractor was a friend of the in-laws, then even if he didn't know the house specifically belonged to OP and her husband, he had to have at least known it didn't belong to the in-laws. Which means he KNOWINGLY did work on a house where the homeowner hadn't even been consulted about it. I feel like OP and her husband should be able to get him in a crap ton of trouble with that detail.

[@SK98765]

Sounds very similar to my situation. We scheduled our wedding. SIL got pregnant and her due date was too close to the wedding date to come. During the phone call when she told us, we agreed to change the date of the wedding. Because that's what you do when you want the pregnant person at your wedding as well as don't want your family to have to choose between a birth and a wedding.

[@RockinTheBassGuitar]

Story 2 prediction before update: I bet the in-laws needed a new garage door lift and took the old one so they wouldn't have to pay for a new one.

[@kathydurow6814]

Now, I didn't think of that. Good one!

[@lisawhereisthecultjam]

The bride to be in the first story totally did that on purpose.

[@Emily-ck9ji]

I hope I'm not weird for always appreciating when Mark makes the "reddit commenters are expecting future updates". Lol. Gives me the clue to remember those particular stories just in case they pop up again.

[@raveniaelhoran2647]

or just to go to reddit to read them on your own? I'm doing it sometimes when there is something exciting

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Holy Bridezilla Batman! Future Sister in law is one nasty piece of work! 😡 OP is definitely NTA. Poor OP and her poor husband. I hope her husband's brother reconsiders the marriage. After Update: I'm glad Brother in law has going to get a handle on his future wife. Though personally, I think brother in law should really be reconsidering the marriage. Future sister in law sounds insufferable!

[@MovableNu]

Story 2: I agree with folks thinking the in laws broke the door but couldn’t afford the repair. But also, don’t they now also have a remote to the door and access to OP’s house?

[@kathydurow6814]

I like the switcheroo suggestion too - trying to get the kids to pay for something belonging to the parents that broke so they swapped out the old one to their place & new one to kids thinking the kids would pay.

[@kbf9644]

#2 - Him apologizing to her is your problem. And within a few days? Why would they change their behavior when there are no repercussions?

[@kathydurow6814]

Yup time for hubby to grow a spine now they are married.

[@darkage1524]

is it just me or did anyone else instantly think that the bride in story 1 was trying to make op miscarry out of jealousy by trying to guilt her into doing risky travel at late stage of pregnancy

[@Ivy94F]

Nah, because at that late stage, it wouldn’t be a miscarriage, it would be a birth. I just think the OP hasn’t had a full term pregnancy yet, so she’s speaking out of ignorance and selfishness.

[@edwardbickford8277]

Story 1: A 7 hour one way trip is a lot of travel time on it's own. Let alone with a pregnant woman who is close to her due date. There is no way that OP is the Ahole. I wouldn't take that trip under those circumstances either.

[@AndyyWithAY]

7 hours is a very long drive. I'm sure that would be a nightmare as a pregnant woman. I know it wouldn't be okay on a plane, and I'm sure the doctor wouldn't advise it in a car either. OP states her OB ruled it out. There's no way I would let my husband go to a wedding that close to my due date and it would not be up for discussion. I know it's better to wait to tell people, but I would tell everyone I'll be literally about to go into labor any moment and that's why me and my spouse are not coming. That's just me. I'm petty.

[@tallyp.7643]

Yeah, not counting food and rest stops, pee breaks... got a big bunch of poundage pressing against the bladder, so it's gonna be a helluva lot longer than 7 hours... and doing it twice? Hells no.

[@DragonTatooToo]

About the garage door, the in laws want permanent entrance to your home. They have a friend that installed and programed the door so they can enter

[@tictactoe325]

Ohhhh boy, this future SIL is going to raise havoc in this family if OP’s BIL goes ahead with the wedding.

[@fhuber7507]

2.. OP and hubby are NTA for refusing to pay for what they didn't order. F those abusive and manipulative parents.

[@carolcarol9982]

I think I'd ask in the group chat if future SIL wanted the attention taken away from Her wedding when I went into labor while walking down the aisle as a bridesmaid. Guck, fluids everywhere.

[@shubham221992]

In Story 2 update, the OP tells us about a similar incident that happened with the pool service and the husband ended up apologizing to is mother. Yea, no wonder they keep doing this shit when your husband is easily manipulated like that. Next time his mother 'threatens' to stop talking to him and ignores his calls, let her be.

[@GMWILD87]

Story 3 I hope OP calls a lawyer and should never sign anything.

[@jerrystauffer2351]

When my parents got married my material grandparents did the landscaping. No one asked them to do this or was consulted or notified what trees would show up ahead of time. They got very angry when Dad pulled the one planted OVER THE SEPTIC TANK. We never did explain to them that is both illegal and stupid.

[@kittikats]

Story 3. Yeah, your grandmother can't change her will at this stage. I have experienced this first hand. The lawyers (if theyre any good) will question your grandmother by herself to see the two following things: 1) is she clear enough to understand and consent to what is going on? Or is she confused or forgetful? 2) without the family member there, does she STILL want to go ahead with this? We had to go with my nan to change her will, get power of attorney and become her legal guardians due to my father passing - current will left 90% of stuff to him. My stepmother would be next for those + in charge of nan but could not be trusted to act in her best interests. Lawyers asked us to leave the room to question my nan. We instantly agreed but she vehemently opposed that. She made it clear we weren't going anywhere and to sit back down. So she was obviously very clear and bossing us around! Not the other way around.

[@samoanjoseph1457]

I got stuck on the fact this girl was proposed to after 4 months. That is the person I would suspect of being manipulative and controlling. Did he propose on his own or did she give him an ultimatum? And honestly if SIL reacts to BIL's idea to move the date how I think she will, there may not even be a wedding to attend.

[@kathydurow6814]

Let's hope the trash takes itself out, for BIL's sake.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Last story WTF! For what reason would the cousin get half of OP's money?. If the uncle wants his son to get money, he can give HALF of HIS 400k. He is abusing the grandmother who is not in her right mind. It's disgusting. Definitely get a lawyer and file that elder abuse case. This is not okay.

[@celesteshearer5498]

Story 2 - reminds me of when my parents broke into my apartment a few years ago on my birthday. Dad made a shelf for me and they got my landlord to let them in while I was at work. Once I made it home and was visibly upset, my parents said "It's ok. You can pay us back when we're old and need you to take care of us."

[@standinthegsp6858]

Since it’s his family your husband needs to do a family post where he explains that you had told his fiancé that you’d be too near your due date. That your dr said absolutely no traveling more than an hour away from the hospital & that your family has a history of early labor & quick delivery. And that IF you were able to go that you being heavily pregnant & possibly going into labor would take attention away from the bride.

[@opal5138]

Don’t have a good day. Have a great day!

[@jesterbob828]

Don't tell me what to do.

[@fangchick93]

I'm pretty sure that if the in laws in the second story were to read this post, theyd give an indignant cry of "how dare you share family business to strangers", while the mother in law is probably venting to whoever is listening about her pov of the situation.

[@kathydurow6814]

Gather the flying monkeys while ye may.....

[@AngharadMac]

Story 2: my guess is they broke the door trying to break in

[@kathydurow6814]

Had keys to front door but "nowhere" to park?

[@AngharadMac]

@@kathydurow6814 didn't they just say "they were told how to access the house"

[@brigidtheirish]

1: I think there's more going on here than SIL being jealous and stressed. I think SIL is trying to isolate BIL and OP is the first to go because she reacted appropriately to SIL's comments at MIL's funeral. 2: *Someone's* nuts, but it isn't OP. *Wow.* What also gets me is why people felt the need to ask what a garage life is. Sure, it's called a garage door opener in the US, but context makes it pretty clear. The last bullet point should've been when OP insisted her husband get some *serious* help because this is *not* a healthy relationship with his mother. Or left. As it is, dude needs psychiatric help, they *both* need to change the locks, and I *strongly* advise no contact. 3: I think the truth is there won't be any money in the estate because the uncle squandered it all. The grandma is also *clearly* not in sound mind for making changes to her will or trust. What a bunch of greedy bastards.

[@kathydurow6814]

Culture clash here, in countries where a lift is an elevator, they might have thought the replacement was an elevator between a lower garage floor and an upper living floor. Pretty posh, but for a country where automation beats physical labour a lot of the time, one never knows.....

[@brigidtheirish]

@@kathydurow6814 I guess? That would be pretty posh.

[@Tyanna01]

Story 1: Sounds like BIL's gf got pregnant and BIL proposed right away. Given how gf is acting, I wonder if she was actually pregnant, or just said it to baby trap him then said there was a loss. I hope that's not the case, but the way she's acting....damn.

[@alicewilloughby4318]

Story 1 - 5:52 - Why are there so many stories where the whole family feels entitled to stick their nose in and dictate what the OP should do?? And why do they so often just start berating OP on the word of the person who went crying to them, and don't bother to ask OP for their side of the story? Story 3 - I want to say that someone needs to get the grandmother away from the uncle FAST, but I know it's not that simple. Where, and with whom, is she supposed to live after having be rescued from under Uncle Greedy's thumb? With her dementia, would she feel she was being kidnapped? This is a tragic situation all around.

[@toxicginger9936]

Story 1... I had my son at 35 weeks... there is NO way I'd travel or want my spouse to travel so far away after 34 weeks

[@MrGavintron]

S1 - WTH is it with assholes getting family/friends involved in private matters? And WTH is it with them actually sticking their noses in? At this point, anyone that goes to family/friends can basically be judged assholes without going further.

[@kathydurow6814]

Yeah, the flying monkeys love to gather. Best defence is usually "If you're so concerned then you (do the thing)." E.g. "then I can count you in for $10K, right? Because faaaaamily." Or, "here's Johnny, glad you offered to be the faaaamily to look after him" followed by a quick dump & dash. "I'm glad you said faaamily should look after each other, cause I asked my parents for that long ago they kicked me out/disowned me, so I'm no longer faaamily. So glad you're going to help them" " They said they didn't want a 'sinner' like me around, hey, I'm still sinning away here, so it's best for their souls that they stay away". Etc. :D

[@Rhaenarys]

That last story: if grandma is that far out of it and uncle is just feeding her lies...fight fire with fire. Tell her...but grandma! I signed the agreement! What is uncles deal? Is he trying to scam you? I'd be worried grandma... If you're such a devoted grandson, it should work like a charm.

[@srideout91]

R/thathappened The cartoonishly evil sister-in-law in the damsel in distress who is OP. Whatever shell she do.

[@emeraldpichu1]

Chances are the uncle overstretched himself While abusing his mothers Retirement fund and needs Op’s Portion so he can hide his indiscretions If it comes to an audit.

[@fhuber7507]

3... OP needs to not sign a damn thing and F that uncle. And demand a full audit of estate. Get lawyers and police involved.

[@Believesinpeace]

The last story reminds me of my own Uncle who was my Grandmother’s golden child finding out how much his mother was worth after she passed. He lived less than an hour away but only visited less than a handful of times a year, leaving his sister,my mother and father to look after their parents for 30 years without even an offer of help, she stayed with them once for a weekend. He even went on holidays during the time she was actively dying in hospital only returning for the funeral where my mother showed him the balance of the bank account, I heard him mutter “if only I knew she was worth this much”, thankfully my Grandmother had the forethought to make my parents her Power of Attorney and had even tried to add my father to her will for a full share of the inheritance, Mum refused knowing that it would cause trouble. He threw a tantrum when he thought there had been money drawn from the account, which actually was a deposit. I know he would bled his mother dry if he knew, just as I feel that OP’s Uncle has/is doing to the Grandmother.

[@MandyLina123]

I had to look up 38 weeks. Its 9 months pregnant so baby is due any minute. Yeah, I wouldn’t go either knowing I could give birth any minute now 🤷‍♀️

[@Nevertoleave]

I Forget sometimes that not everyone knows pregnancy is measured in weeks. Yeah the due date is set 40 weeks after the last known date of the menstrual cycle

[@MandyLina123]

@@Nevertoleave I haven’t been pregnant so I had no idea lol.

[@Itzelhaim]

I waited all day for this

[@FriedaMMartin]

Literally can put both wife and husband at risk. The birth is more important than her wedding. Brothers future wife is terrible.

[@nikig2891]

I purchased a garage lift for my brother when he bought his first home. Also paid for it to be installed. Took care of everything in my city and had everything delivered and arranged in his city. All he had to do was decide on the date and time for the installation. It’s called a gift.

[@dianaibarra]

Love u Mark. 💕 your voice is so calming. I listen to you when I need to relax, so thank you. Sending my love from Mexico.

[@johnpatricklim4509]

getting married after only 4 months of dating is a huge red flag....

[@srkh8966]

Not necessarily

[@jennilynne1977]

I hope everyone is having a great day/evening/night! Peace, hugs and love to you all!

[@yoyopron]

My first thought on story 2 was, "They know the contractor." It's not about the garage lift, it's about making money for their friend.

[@kristelneedtoknow3207]

Second story bet they broke the garage door and replaced it as a cover as they didn't want to pay for it.

[@meinorha9370]

This reminds me of the time I bought a new table and chairs for my kitchen. My father agreed to put them together since they required tools I didn't have, but refused to do the job in my kitchen since it was 'too tiny' for him, so he took the table & chairs to his workplace and it took him over a year to give them back to me. But in the meanwhile, he had no problems coming secretly to my place with my mother to install in the kitchen the ugliest lamp I've seen that I had no need for (the kitchen already had other lights...) and when I expressed my confusion with all of this, my mom said 'we had to do it secretly because we thought you'd say no'. Well thought! I would have said no! Parents like this are so arbitrary...

[@redresearchanalyst]

First story, I see a very unhappy bil’s marriage , potential isolation from rest of family and/or divorce in near future. Sad for bil, whole family.

[@standinthegsp6858]

Op, you need to report your grandmother as an elder in danger & that your uncle, aunt & cousin are manipulating her. Report this to the police, her Drs & her attorney & get your own attorney. Her attorneys need to hire a forensic accountant to make an account of all funds he’s supposedly spending on her.

[@Mewse1203]

Be kind, be safe and take care of yourself. Have a great day

[@ceciliacalvin263]

In America it’s called a garage door opener. 😉 < Story 1. Story 2: GET A LAWYER ASAP! Uncle is a con artist.

[@Icalasari]

14:30 - So what OP is saying is they need to start calling the police on them for trespassing, and try to get a restraining order

[@dancing0nthe3dge]

Story 2: here I am, smoking a bowl in my garage staring at the Lift Master and thinking....wtff? If it wasn't broken???? Huh? OP, have you been to the RBN subreddit? You should visit it.

[@kathydurow6814]

I like the suggestion that the parents installed the old one at their place for some reason, then ordered the new one with the expectation the son & DIL would pay. Or they did something while breaking into the garage (idk how).

[@wendyhadley2764]

It's a little late to say this now but in a situation like this the communication from day one should have been between Brothers, future sil should not have called you not her place.

[@kathydurow6814]

Oh, but it's "her" wedding so why shouldn't she? (Sarcasm)

[@treehouse2902]

1. She set the wedding date close to the due date on purpose.

[@locusxe1411]

Story 2 HUGE NTA- No one asked for that! How are you just gonna walk into someone’s garage and install something for them without their knowledge and permission and then expect them to pay you? Edit after update: Why are y’all still in contact with these people? This isn’t new behavior for them and they’ve don’t stuff like this before. Your husband is a wuss for apologizing for something he didn’t do. Get them out of your lives

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

I wouldn't be able to travel after the 30-week mark if this were me, being a high risk for prem births. I really don't get people who do this, honestly, that future SIL is definitely one of those types, (kinda hope no longer be future SIL when I get to the update). The kind who will purposely pick dates and do things despite people, all in order to control the narrative. Also, I feel I detected a bit of deflection from that woman about OP being abusive and stuff... yeah... sure... are you sure that's not you lady?

[@pickle_pup8187]

FSIL is a troublemaker and did this totally on purpose - from setting the wedding date and the other things. Hopefully BIL sees the red flags that are flapping wildly. 🚩🤦🏻‍♀️ The garage door one - this is actually a problem for FIL and the garage door company. Technically FIL is the one that authorized it and OP and her DH cannot be made to pay it. FIL crossed boundaries and entered into a contract with another party and he had no right to do so. OP and her DH need to hold firm. Make sure they cannot access your home going forward. Change locks/codes. Put the ILs is a time out.

[@The.S.M.Evans.91]

Story 1: 4 months?? That's it?? Dude, SIL to be already sounds batshit crazy 😳

[@lynngrant533]

My mom and her younger brother lived about 700 miles from each other. His wedding was on September 23rd and I came along on Sept 26th. No one gave mom and dad any flack about missing the wedding. They had plenty of get together’s through the years after that. No one’s going to travel a long way when they’re almost at term.

[@precious_toebeans]

"Girlfriend of 4 months" 🚩

[@paden1865able]

I was five months pregnant and not allowed to go to my grandpa's funeral because it was a long drive. Grandma wanted me there but she's the one who said that I shouldn't travel. I was huge and high risk; the whole family told me not to take the chance.

[@rylashadow18]

S1) Just tell the future BIL you know you won't be there for the wedding but you'll be there for the next one when he marries someone that isn't an entitled selfish witch. S2) I'd get the information of when it was installed, copies of the information that shows you weren't even home during this time and text confirmation that your parents did this illegally then sue them in court. Change the locks and install camera's as well as a trespassing order against them. On hearing the edit that contractor could loose his license if he did this job off the books but is looking to still get paid for it. The so called friends name is on thie invoice? The friend that owns the busines? Just turn them in to the city for operating on your home without a contract with the home owners. Sue him as he has no legal contract with you. If he decides to go after your parents that's his choice. If it cost him his construction license it'll be a lesson well learned. S3) Abolutely not. Sounds like they need to be reported for elderly abuse and get a lawyer. What they want is to basically steal an inheritence that's yours from your mother going down the line of her direct decendent which is you. They want more than the inheritence 600k while you get 200k. I'd also seek his power of attorney to be stripped (If he has one. If not look into what can be done to legally protect grammy) as they maybe even taking money from her rn as we speak. I'd get a lock down on those accounts and have an investigation started to ensure grammy's money is going into grammy's needs. Those money hungry butt munchers want more than their share? Odd's are if they are taking money rn they'll get that accounted to their inheritence. Have a trustee in charge of Grammy's accounts for her needs one that isn't based in the money grubbers camp.

[@Paradisepie32]

The second story with the parents.... my mom is exactly like this... she will buy shit u didn't ask for or need and tell u that u owe her

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

I can't believe the uncle is tormenting his own mother when she's so vulnerable (elder with dementia).

[@scarletgoldenthorn]

I hope you’re having a good day, Mark! ❤

[@emcustard]

Absolutely ridiculous to expect pregnant couple to travel that close to due date. Sure, if she goes into labor it’s unlikely to be less than seven hours, so he could theoretically drive back in time for the birth. But labor is an important part of the delivery and shouldn’t be discounted.

[@AndyyWithAY]

I'm off work for the weekend, lying in bed. Looking forward to reading this new book later tonight. Being off and being able to relax. Wishing a happy weekend to all, Mark and Waffle Gang. Much love.

[@stillvisibletoallusers]

Just out curiosity, what new book are you reading? I'm rereading atm. The Bronze Horseman.

[@DameNickum]

Story 3, there is an agency in the US child protective services. The other half of that is Adult Protective Services. I would contact that agency, and inform them of the fiduciary abuse that you suspect is happening. They will interview and make recommendations, or involve law enforcement. I would make sure my grandmother was safe, cared for, and not being gas lighted or manipulated to act out of fear/fear. Fear! Take care of grandma.

[@Cel3ere5]

*Story 2* 🔸 NTA, but that's the least of your problems. Y'all need to contact a lawyer and press charges on that contractor. What he did is illegal. Hope his license was worth doing his "friends" a favor. *Story 3*🔸 I've never heard legal advice be so kindhearted and so friggin brutal at the same time. That attorney has zero chill and I love it.

[@kathydurow6814]

Good lawyers are absolutely like that. They tell you how you can get what you aim for, or as close as possible, legally. Loopholes etc, smiling assassins on your side. The bad ones simply say, no the law doesn't let you do that, have no creative thought & simply exist to complete standard documents and deal with red tape so you don't have to. The first type are worth paying extra, the latter you have to handhold, chase and check Everything on documents before completion. Ex small business accountant, I speak from experience.

[@lindamcferrin5621]

Story about the garage door opener…sell the house, return the down payment money to grooms parents and find another place to live. If you don’t this will be a regular recurrence.

[@Rhaenarys]

Personally, doesn't matter if you like the fiancee or not. 38 weeks is WAY too far along to be traveling that far away. Nta based on that alone.

[@KCCAT5]

Travel 7hrs? While 36 weeks pg? Wtf is wrong with this bridezilla?