Meanwhile... Chuck E. Cheese Returns | No Donuts At Dunkin' | Mosh Pit Diaper | 25-Cent Burgers

[@laurenkwh]

“Drifter’s bug nugget of news” just made my whole day 😂

[@Vynextus]

You don’t need to spend $75 on a “mosh pit” diaper. Just get a regular adult diaper like a normal metalhead. Two layers if you’re feeling feisty

[@Doooomed360]

Sounds like you need some serious help if you're wearing diapers to shit yourself. So um, call someone k?

[@Doooomed360]

And btw I wouldn't refer to normal metal heads wearing diapers. That sounds more like a you problem. Good luck with your loose asshole.

[@tao31416]

Not sure, if they planned it "right", the absorbent material might be layered with the outer shell. They do mention leather, which would make it unlikely to be something you’d completely throw away. Add to that the idea that the purpose is not to wet/sully yourself, but just to be prepared, in case an accident was to happen. It couldn’t possibly be 75$ for "just in case, once", it would have to be reusable, to some extend. Maybe it’s a washable inner material with a leather outer shell? I’m not curious to look it up, though my tendency to be interested in weird products does make me wonder for whom it’s designed and what would be the defining product design decision you’d need to make in order for it to sell (albeit to a very limited and niche audience)

[@TheJubess]

@@tao31416 I'm glad you gave it this much thought. Reading it, half way through, I thought: " nahh this guy has it covered. I won't read the rest"

[@nolaah1]

Ummmmm just bring an extra Gatorade bottle problem solved lol 😂

[@Heartofitall9691]

Anyone remember the good ole days when Dunkin actually made their donuts on premise?? Like a NORMAL donut shop!?😢

[@kiras3180]

"That's nuts!" Well played.

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Let's cover those things up! No one wants to see that. 🌰🧆🥜

[@The-Maestro-Bob-Cobb]

i was gonna say kinda nuts you get nuts in ur nut form eating nuts

[@MonkeyJedi99]

Anyone with that sensitive an allergy is only alive because of modern medicine.

[@Matt.Thompson.1976]

🤣🤣🤣Formerly Rat-Owned Pizza Emporium!!!😅😅😅 As always, thanks Steven and team....what the $%$##@ would we do without you.

[@grazeinthepasture]

I could not have been the only one on the edge of my seat waiting for something like nuts in the nut.

[@mikemcconeghy4658]

I liked how he shushed the crowd before going for the more complicated joke.

[@grazeinthepasture]

@mikemcconeghy4658 all class, that guy is.

[@christophermerlot3366]

We used to drink Rye and Jolts at parties back in the 1980s. Made for some interesting events.

[@Styphon]

And they think Red Bull and Vodka is something new, or that the original Four Loko was "too dangerous". But I would have preferred "Rum & ⚡"

[@KingOfMadCows]

So they doughnut know what was causing the shortage at Dunkin.

[@unvergebeneid]

No. Just, no.

[@laalaa99stl]

Well. They'd already dropped "Donut" from their name so...

[@likebot.]

Meanwhile, a yellow and blue bot was spotted at a Wendy's ordering 81 _Dave's Singles._ FOUND THE LOOPHOLE! 3:38

[@peacefulsoulwarrior]

Jolt⚡ & Bugles got me through late night study sessions in college.

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

If you're thin, gorgeous, and successful now, I hate you.

[@johnwattdotca]

What's with the Bugles? Why not Doritos Corn Chips?

[@MonkeyJedi99]

@@johnwattdotca Some people, myself included, don't like Doritos. That means more chemical-dusted chips for you!

[@MonkeyJedi99]

To start my day, it was Jolt and Vivarin. I was working full-time overnights and going to college 15-21 credits per semester while in the National Guard. Most weeks I slept 6 times in seven days, usually about 5-1/2 hours at a time. I may have parted ways with my sanity here and there...

[@johnwattdotca]

@@MonkeyJedi99 Not being a user, I see Doritos Corn Chips as being more of a food than Bugles. You might be surprised at my lifestyle, how I eat living fruits, vegetables, seeds and nuts, and that's all I'm going to say.

[@Moekoffee2001]

When it comes to Dunkin Donuts, thanks for the hole story

[@phillippuxlucas8686]

😁😁😁😁😁😁

[@denisroym2110]

Ah! 😁

[@3peanpod]

it’s full of holes, dough.

[@phillippuxlucas8686]

@@Moekoffee2001 HOLY Sh!t can this be true? 🤔

[@jonathanryals9934]

It went from Dunkin Donuts to Drinkin Nonuts.

[@jeswilde6188]

This world is nuts 😅

[@cmuller1441]

1:08 What happened to the "Meanwhile music" ???? 😮😢 Bring the good one back !!! 😊

[@dkayflowers79]

They're getting a Lil corny lately no lol

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Yeah.

[@arthurneddysmith]

1:33 "FROPE" is now my band name.

[@mho...]

*frope* eh?! .... thats an oooooldschool Battlefield KZbinr!

[@roryoutdoors5431]

“Time to manufacture the donuts…” 🍩 🔧 🔨

[@jodyjm13]

"I manufactured the donuts."

[@WestOfEarth]

Jolt Cola: Twice the caffeine of other colas! Energy drinks: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[@freya8133]

I miss Jolt Cola.

[@kenbrown2808]

there weren't energy drinks back in the days before.

[@tonyhsloanejr]

Lol I remember jolt as a kid it was crazy

[@being1gaga]

Meanwhile is a wake up call, apparently. At midnight. 🤯🤯🤯🤯

[@pedalingprospector2007]

I used to work with a guy who came to work with 2 of the large size bottles of Jolt, every day.

[@unvergebeneid]

When the writers saw that "nut allergy triggered after sex" headline, they must've instantly know they would go home early that day :D

[@Coffeepotion]

Neither coke nor pepsi have alot of caffein in them though. It's mostly the sugar rush that you feel...

[@spadress]

A jolt cola only contains as much caffeine as a cup of coffee

[@lifewuzonceezr]

😂

[@malavoy1]

Twice the caffeine of Coke and Pepsi is about what you get in a Mountain Dew, and that's a lot less than a cup of tea, never mind coffee.

[@blackphoenixfamily8477]

"The relaunched Jolt Cola will have 200 milligrams of caffeine per 16-ounce can. This is more than triple the amount of caffeine in the original Jolt Cola, which had about 70 milligrams per 12-ounce can in 1985."

[@garymoon3653]

So... Facebook removed fact checking, and you all are taking up residence here amongst the comedy bits?

[@malavoy1]

@@blackphoenixfamily8477 Good to know, about the equivalent of a 2 liter bottle of coke or pepsi (197 mg) without all the excess liquid. 😁

[@vonslagle]

We sold Jolt at the bar I worked at in San Francisco 20 years ago. Nothing like silver tequila with Jolt!

[@Heartofitall9691]

I can't believe they investigated the woman's condition to the point of being able to confirm the semen had proteins from allergens. I live in NE OH where we have the CCF and UHHS and my family has multiple anaphylactic food allergies, ain't nothing of that magnitude going on in caring for them, or anybody we know

[@sb-b3071]

That mosh pit diaper 😂😂

[@dogcarman]

A combination of words I’d never thought I would hear. 🤣

[@Reyn_Roadstorm]

It totally gives Mad Max vibes. Just need some combat boots, football pads, a face mask of some sort and about 3 cans of hairspray for the mohawk. Add chains and leather straps as you please.

[@graemepennell]

25 cent burger multiplied many times till 20 dollars. Feed the homeless for $20.....

[@CLipka2373]

You know there's _no_ way around this one: Technically, _all_ semen contains proteins from nuts... (a pair of them, usually) *Badum-tish!*

[@Apolloartz]

Thought you were gonna go for he had Nuts in his Nuts😂

[@tenzhitihsien888]

I haven't had a Jolt Cola since... wait, what was I talking about?

[@JAllenKaiser]

Remember OK Soda? They should bring that one back. It was weird. …and Crystal Clear Pepsi. That too.

[@tenzhitihsien888]

@@JAllenKaiser Apparently, OK Soda only had a select few areas it was sold in, and based on the given list at Wikipedia I was not in one at the time. I did enjoy Crystal Pepsi, though. And 7Up Gold!

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Oh, look! a squirrel! 🐿

[@Catherinzsl]

"Bananas aren't metric!" -- Stephen Colbert

[@sirtainlee8725]

2:59 the ad had a typo. It meant to say "...let's you BE yourself."

[@flynn_davis]

Dude's nuttin nuts

[@kingjamos2422]

Poor woman was allergic to her partner's nuts...

[@maryrichardskallman]

I kid you not, in DD two weeks ago, tried to order a croissant sandwich and a matcha latte and a voice bellows out from the kitchen “No food today! We’re not making food! And no matcha!” I’m not going to bother with them ever again!

[@medusagorgon9]

That peanut allergy story sounds crazy but some people are also allergic to the fumes of peanuts and other nuts. Unfortunately, I have this issue with onions, oranges, walnuts, pecans and cashews. I instantly become nauseated. Citric acid which is an ingredient in a lot of food items makes me sick too. It's pretty lame.

[@jeanmariani1496]

Ultimate rum and Coke: Bacardi 151 and Jolt. It's fabulous!

[@orchidquest]

I still miss the old theme song. 😅

[@joshmcgriff2598]

Take that, Seth Myers!

[@LunaryxDiarmait]

Fries and Feosties go together hauntingly well.

[@JAllenKaiser]

You are what you eat which is what you skeet.

[@rizz_the_dog]

Top notch writers. Thank you. I think you stole all fallons writers and left him with import writer's

[@NewMessage]

The pizza may be retooled, but the robots never will be.

[@unvergebeneid]

80 burgers for $20 sounds good to me tbh.

[@simonagree4070]

If you have a chest freezer, you could make a profit on that.

[@freya8133]

Feed the homeless!

[@leatherman6328]

Fun fact: here in Canada, bananas are metric. 🇨🇦

[@likebot.]

Friggin explains why I keep stripping them. I _thought_ my sockets wiggled a little bit.

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

You Canucks are sooo special and here in the lower 48 we're sooo jealous. 🇨🇦🇺🇸🇨🇦🇺🇸🇨🇦🇺🇸

[@alpha3305]

👮 CSI Detective (grimacing at the report): "Her death was triggered by traces of peanuts in his... semen." 😎 Horatio Caine (smirking): "Talk about a killer load." 🎶 YEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!! 🎶

[@dunbarf2413]

""Talk about a killer load."" I read that in Dr. House's voice. Seems like something he would say 🤣😂

[@RuthBhmand]

Peanuts are legumes Not a nut So that peanut man is not ….. Oh never mind

[@eastcoastoverseer]

"Drifter's bug nugget" is crazy!

[@andypanda4756]

BUG NUGGET! 1:02

[@pink953]

Oh no...Happy got arrested at the airport for taking the Crocodile head back to Chubbs

[@DjanineFU]

Is everyone straight in line and not off track all right, Mr. Colbert ? I'm so happy for yousss

[@matthewsermons7247]

They really had to comb though the massive volume of "nut" jokes, didn't they?

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

But at least they blurred Mr. Penis ... er ... I mean Peanut! 🥜

[@Huongsokmach]

A jolt of electricity.

[@JanineStoryteller]

😂😂 I dip my fries in a chocolate frostie too! 😂

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Racist!

[@Jeudaos]

so... your telling me the womens nutt allergy was triggered by my mans... nutt (It's slang for the money shot) This joke writes itself

[@AkiratheAfricanWhiteScopsOwl]

I drank a jolt cola every new years as a kid to stay up for the fireworks etc. It's pretty much the same as a monster or red bull nowadays but taste better. In Japan Pepsi has mini cans of energy drink Pepsi that taste like regular Pepsi which is by far the best energy drinks made. I don't know why they don't have them in USA

[@j.dunlop8295]

Diaper Don, the Trump brand diapers, which come in gold or silver! His face on it!

[@mason96575]

Wait, wait, wait… JOLT COLA WAS NOT THE 80’s… WAS IT?! 😭 oh my holy goodness gracious…! 😭 Normally, I joke about certain things making me feel old - but I actually am not impacted by them the way I make it seem… But this? JOLT Cola was 1987?! Why, Stephen’s Team,,. WHY?! 😭 Meanieheads…

[@freya8133]

Jolt Cola was the 80's.

[@ConfusedPolarBear-jn9ll]

I drank Jolt in the day lol!

[@jeandrzyzgula]

The thing is I actually know people who would use/wear the mosh pit diaper... they're just also the people who would rather thrift some leather from old couch cushions and use the stuffing for absorption. They'd meanwhile the meanwhile product

[@elizabethweaver3103]

Love that

[@john2477]

Drifter’s bug nugget sounds like a disease for hobos.

[@gluteusmaximus1657]

This diaper could be a hit in the Trump collection! Signed edition for 9999$ each.

[@unvergebeneid]

2:12 apparently I don't know what a sandal looks like.

[@freya8133]

I miss Jolt Cola. As for 10 dollars worth of Frostys and 10 dollars worth of fries at Wendy's, that's really not hard to do these days.

[@pattygman4675]

Wend’s just opened their first store in Brisbane Australia. No America. No, you don’t get to clog our arteries with your fast food. We already have enough of our own fast food joints to do that. Along with the McDonald’s, KFC, Pizza Hut. Ok, ok just wedge another piece of Americana down our food holes. Dam you. 😂😂😂

[@iyyakamusicvideo4369]

Thank You Stephen...Thank You My Friend..Thank You...😉😉😉

[@deesiobhan]

Bananas *are* metric 😂

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Are you a closet Canadian? 🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦

[@hamperionsma7218]

Look at that suit!

[@guppygrease9767]

When teething stop on by, frosty and fries.

[@Kristene.L]

Ahhh nuts!!

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Sorry, I'll have to blur you.

[@AceBadguy72]

25 cent burger , 5 cents beef , 20 cents pink slime ( Senate Bill SB-68 )

[@SpaceCowFour]

What's up with the "Meanwhile" theme music change?

[@ircjesselee]

1:18 *Meanwhile*

[@TooRudeProductions]

Wow, you're really ungrateful, the writers put a lot of effort into those openings

[@simonagree4070]

Thus spake... The Gatekeeper!

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Tip of the hat to ya! 🎩

[@maryrichardskallman]

@@Picklesnot-co3kWag of the Finger… IYKYK

[@freya8133]

Jeez and I thought that I had a short attention span!

[@gibbsrule9188]

It's the Liquid Death mosh pit diaper and it's sold out

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Get on the waiting list ... NOW!

[@freya8133]

YIKES!!

[@kvonjaco]

So very yummy! Let's Car go!

[@alxa4739]

I can't beleive he referenced my famous bug nugget recipe!

[@ursaltydog]

Whoever the internet person is... that was an excellent Thumbnail placement!

[@SSNCM]

JOLT is programmer fuel...

[@PeppermintGentleman]

I should've known it was a robot band that took the place of Stay Human.

[@PrincessTS01]

well eggs are $9 for 1 dozen, no way people want donuts to go up in price

[@animasharma6192]

Protein in uria is called as proteinuria. Which could be a sign of renal disorders.

[@vassilis.christopoulos]

Poulet-Montrachet would mean “chicken - Montrachet” and doesn’t exist, Stephen! There are excellent wines in Burgundy such as Pouilly fumé or Pouligny-Montrachet. I was expecting more sophistication from you 😂

[@gerhard589]

Wendy's in Japan doesn't offer Frosties 😢

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

What's the plural of Wendy's?

[@gerhard589]

@Picklesnot-co3k either Wendy'ses, Wendi or just Wendy's

[@freya8133]

Well that sucks.

[@anushapremkumar7356]

I’d read ages ago that Brazil nut allergens were released in semen. Wonder if other nuts do the same

[@dyslexiaDIY]

Pasquale😂😂😂😂

[@eight216]

"bro we heard you like nutts"

[@valkyrie1066]

Jolt Cola. When it came out; we bought a six pack. We worked in a factory making microscopic computer parts. At some poinet, the boss arrived....and pointed out, in shock, that our shift ended 45 minutes previously. Jolt Cola and headphones are a deadly combination. We all accidently worked overtime. He asked that we not drink that stuff again. He feared for our health.

[@Anjili-e2t]

Was that you Stephen, modeling the wears?

[@kjpcgaming9296]

Stewart and Lynda Resnick, a billionaire couple who own around 60% of an important California water resource, have come under intense criticism for using more water than every home in Los Angeles combined, with critics arguing that their actions may be hindering efforts to contain the city's ongoing wildfires.

[@Cancun771]

Where did he get that Kinder Egg?!

[@migmit]

And $20.25 is not a burger either, it's a year.

[@johnsmith01001]

What a video.

[@tmirred1945]

still didnt get used to the new intro music

[@ConfusedPolarBear-jn9ll]

1986 Jolt btw

[@rittwik]

2:42 😂🤣

[@Picklesnot-co3k]

Than kew !!!

[@ryansmith8782]

Hey that stuff sounds like AI

[@ConfusedPolarBear-jn9ll]

Omg these docs....nope

[@1977minicooper1380]

but I have some ground beef with this deal.....not one chuckle!!

[@HermitOnWheels]

You can get a contact high off a guy who uses drugs.