MST3k 411 - The Magic Sword

[@i-a-g-r-e-e-----f-----jo--b]

RIP Bert I Gordon, 2023. Thanks for all the MST3K material you directed!

[@jorgezarco9269]

Gary Lockwood was cast as "Gary Mitchell" in the 1966 Star Trek episode Where No Man Has Gone Before. He also played Dr. Poole in 2001: A Space Odyssey(1968).

[@Snafubar23]

Wow. I can't remember the last time I saw an AOL commercial. Back in the day a friend of mine made his own Doom WAD, set in a suburban neighborhood. One of the weapons he added was a gun that shot AOL CDs. You could find ammo for it in every mailbox in the game.

[@typacsk]

That's brilliant XD

[@garysuarez9614]

@@typacsk agreed

[@sixgunshauna3486]

Your friend was a beautiful man.

[@glenncox5695]

I first saw "The Magic Sword" about 50 years ago when I was about 6 years old, and it impressed the heck out of me with all the fantasy, medieval knights, & magic. MST3K did a great job lampooning this.

[@SpamEggSausage]

I can see kids who like fantasy liking this movie unironically

[@brandonnotsowise2640]

@@adriabelanger9456I think he was talking about seeing the original movie when he was 6.

[@yerabbit]

@@SpamEggSausage my brothers and I used to watch this growing up in the 80s, we unironically liked it. :) But it's still great MST3K fodder

[@mariakelly90210]

​@katieallen8021 The first time I saw this movie, it was the non-MST3K version and I loved it!

[@MmMm-sf7pe]

Great riffs! Although the movie should be titled "Bland Ungrateful Son Succeeds Thanks to Magic Foster Mom."

[@Jitterzz]

I'm not gonna lie, I really like the mother character. When she says her lines, her delivery sounds so much like Alec Guinness in a way. She's the Ben Kenobi of this movie. Hahaha

[@cabooseresurrected5183]

Jitterzz You mean the late Estelle Winwood.

[@GenY42]

Yeah, she and the evil wizard are the best characters in the movie, they're the ones with the backstory and rivalry

[@Mr22thou]

@@cabooseresurrected5183 Why do I think of her as one of Samantha's aunts in Bewitched? I looked it up. She was in only one episode. But I remember her so well.

[@wendysgarden4283]

@@Mr22thou you shocked me! I didn't believe it at first but confirmed what you found. I would have sworn she was in several episodes. She sure must have done well, for she stuck with us.

[@wendysgarden4283]

@@dagonvaldez2878 I'm a straight woman and I notice that too! It doesn't make you a pig. It means you have functioning eyes. : )

[@marquis911]

Tom Servo has his Tibby Turtle, Crow has his Estelle Wintwood, and I've got this episode on loop.

[@cedarwriter26]

Helene: "So, how'd you know to rescue me?" George: "Oh I've been watching you swimming naked in my magic pool."

[@GhostScratch]

What a perverted jerk. He only wants to rescue because of his lust, and Helen doesn't know about that.

[@dadahyena]

Thank you for leaving the Adam West commercial intact; if there's one thing "Zombie Nightmare" taught us it's that MST3K and Adam West go together gloriously!

[@yvonnerousseau2238]

Estelle Winwood (Sybil) lived to 101.

[@blakeadamson1576]

She really was magical.

[@НатальяКондратенко-ж8д]

Y'know, George is really kind of a ponce. I mean even looking past the "Locks his mother in the cellar to go chase some skirt" aspect of it he's woefully incompetent and ends up leading six other dudes to their deaths. All of his successes in the film are due to the works of other people: Whether the magic and meddling of his foster mother. The aid of those deus ex machina little people or the expendable knights in his service. My point is, George is an incompetent buffoon

[@joewhitfield5561]

And then made this movie😆

[@yohannbiimu]

I liked her in "Murder By Death."

[@faithfulgrl]

@@yohannbiimu Yes! Wow, is been a couple minutes.

[@erickhorton7702]

This is Burt I Gordon finest work. One of the best episodes.

[@only257]

Erick Horton the movie unriffed is a lot of fun to watch😊

[@AmyLSacks]

My runner-up for favorite episode. Only *Secret Agent Super-Dragon* beats it.

[@notinspectorgadget]

@@AmyLSacks Danger! Death Ray. For me

[@AmyLSacks]

@@notinspectorgadget I myself never leave home without my custom-made Italian eyeglasses 😎

[@faithfulgrl]

@@AmyLSacks What puts Secret Agent Super-Dragon over the top is the fabulous Tony Award winning theme song!

[@alder2982]

I agree with Joel! This film is actually kinda good, for a Bert I. Gordon film

[@BryonYoungblood]

No kidding.

[@lawrencekedz]

Why didn't they show us his drawings? I'm famous as a world renowned art critic. Also to I'm a genius with a 248⅗ I cue. Don't make me mad or I'll take over the universe by meself. Sew their?

[@SpamEggSausage]

I think little kids who like fantasy would like this movie.🐉

[@calebtate4994]

Yeah it really is, Bert I. Gordon should be proud of this movie!

[@Windows100.09TheVideoEditor]

Too bad the movie's portrayal of George is an ungrateful lustful perv!

[@yerabbit]

this has gotta be one of the best episodes

[@alexanderz3556]

"mount your horses men." "we're not THAT lonely!"

[@davidschwartz6380]

my first time wth this movie...cant wait for that scene

[@jeg5gom]

1:09:28 Tom: " 𝅗𝅥 𝅘𝅥 𝅘𝅥𝅮 but can she control her bladder 𝅘𝅥𝅯𝅘𝅥𝅰𝅘𝅥 𝅘𝅥𝅮 " Priceless!

[@nightshift5201]

36:10

[@Cocarat206]

A lot of these old fantasy movies they watch, especially the Finno-Russian ones, are pretty fun if you shut your brain off and just relax.

[@kloggmonkey]

they're often beautiful to look at as well.

[@only257]

love this movie, the mst3k version is hiliarous though the riffing was good but the host segments were great

[@LoneKharnivore]

The same goes for all the movies. I always enjoy them as much as the commentary.

[@michaelccozens]

I especially like the foreign films, because there's the whole extra cultural-comparison layer, eg. "Why do they represent x thing this way, when we do it that way?", etc. Plus it really gives the guys a chance to exercise their deep cultural knowledge with high-brow bon mots, spaced with fart jokes.

[@sottosopravoce]

Absolutely! I love the dreamy quality if the Russo-Finnish ones, their beautiful scores, and the riffing that focuses less on mocking the film and more on skewing the interpretation to make it mean something new.

[@gamayunagogo]

10 years and damn near 600 comments, and I'm still the only one who thinks "Avaunt, and quit mine sight, dickweed!" is the best line of the episode?

[@garysuarez9614]

I do. But only because it's my 10 years anniversary for watching it.

[@AmyLSacks]

I think my favorite is "Weird sexual tension."

[@Tasla1]

re-post(from another mst3k classic): Ah the memories... thank you for posting. I lived in the states for 12 years ..... I learned to love the counry and the people. But (almost) above all I learned the love of bad movies with good captions from the MST3K team.

[@thebamboozlerette1824]

I think they put most of their budget into that two-headed dragon. It’s a pretty good piece of puppetry.

[@AdamG1983]

"You shall face me, Mordac the Immortal!" >Dies from a cougar bite literally 1 min later

[@daffers2345]

When I first watched this movie myself, I got all confused. I couldn't figure out what the "Seventh Curse" was supposed to be, because he dies immediately. I thought maybe they didn't bring it up or I'd miscounted or something. Turns out it's just a dumb Deus Ex Machina XD

[@only257]

AdamG1983 love this episode it was a hiliarous episode good riffing and good host segments funniest mst3k episodes to me were eegah,earth vs the spider fugitive alien manos hands of fate moon zero two pod people Santa Claus from 1959 Santa Claus conquers the martians and teenagers from outer space 😎📼🎥😊👍☺️

[@BryonYoungblood]

No one said Lodac was a smart man... X-D

[@shadenox8164]

And looks remarkably good for someone mauled by a cougar.

[@TheRogueWolf]

In which we learn the difference between "immortal" and "invincible".

[@yvonnerousseau2238]

"And Terry, the sensitive knight." ha!

[@mariahardy1201]

I wasn't skulking, I was hanging around!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Priceless

[@zc456]

To be honest, I find this one of their better movies that they've done.

[@SparrowwithaMachinegun]

9:55 "All the other kings said I was daft to build a castle in a swamp, but I built it all the same"

[@emilinebelle7811]

Kfor Kira love it!

[@Acesahn]

I love that the German knight actually has an appropriate Holy Roman Empirish standard on his tunic.

[@HylianFox3]

Sir Dennis of France also has the 3 Fleur de Lis on his tunic/shield, and Sir Patrick of Ireland's tunic/shield has a green field with what looks like a Phrygian cap on it. Overall, the movie seems to be (very) loosely based on the British legend of Saint George and the Dragon. Notice that George's magic shield is white with a red cross on it, the herald of St. George.

[@SuperNintendawg]

"Empirish"

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

Praise Sigmar!

[@mariakelly90210]

​@@HylianFox3That's what I thought.

[@SpamEggSausage]

@@HylianFox3 all the knights have the same names as the patron saints of their countries

[@TomVfan]

"And pesto flavoured Bail Rathbones for the pretentious dog" now thats a surreal line!

[@andrewfrankovic6821]

With bits of Nigel Bruce.

[@sailordude2094]

One of the rare MST3K films that is entertaining on its own in a non joke way. Basil Rathbone, Estelle Winwood and Gary Lockwood, works for me, special effects for the dragon not bad either! Better then Gorgo! BTW, Gary is still alive in 2024 at age 86! Thanks for the cool movies Gary! Thanks Analog for your channel, I used to watch it a lot more at work overseas at night!

[@GenY42]

59:40 Rest in peace, Adam West.

[@mariakelly5]

Bruce Wayne, you will be missed.

[@faithfulgrl]

💡🦹‍♀️(use your imagination) Has it really been that long? The Adam West "Batman" TV show was made into a movie. When my son, who was 10 saw it, he loved it, even more than any of the in-theatre "masterpieces" Anyway, good times 📺

[@Bfdidc]

This movie was actually kind of fun in its own right.

[@DrRotwang]

+Bfdidc -- It totally is! I saw it unriffed before watching the MST take on it, and it really is a good time.

[@only257]

+DrRotwang agreed did the same thing🤖

[@FrenchPaul1988]

Agreed, it's a pretty fun romp. Hell, even the guys behind MST3K acknowledged it was actually pretty good.

[@choosecarefully408]

Based on the comments, no one else noticed this: it was kind of self-aware at the start with Helene talking about how there is nothing else for a princess to do. Then the deals between Mordac & that treacherous knight: a lose/lose situation the knight could never win. One _had_ to betray the other, the other's goal was their destruction because each posed a threat to the other. The knights were almost introduced as cannon-fodder. They all had names. Then George states his reason for rescuing Helene & they're really only there to die after that. I guess MST3K cut out the part where George finds & rallies them to this cause - as well as even _how_ he finds them. I don't think that Sybil told him how.

[@xwrn]

Thank you so much for leaving in the Adam West AOL commercial. Inspired!

[@Palmieres]

This movie has possibly the most obnoxious, unearned lead hero ever put to film. That princess is a perfect match for him. Their children will be the kind of people who pour the milk first in a bowl of cereal.

[@yerabbit]

HAHA! now that's a good expression for dumbness

[@Trollificusv2]

They'll put their toilet rolls on the wrong way. The bastards/

[@blakeadamson1576]

Well, Tom Servo did say that mental illness was a sign of nobility.

[@ErisApplebottom]

@@blakeadamson1576 its kind of true. When everyone wants to take your familys throne, inbreeding was a way to keep the kingdom in the royal family. But several generations of incest will make your kids all sorts of fucked up

[@blakeadamson1576]

@@ErisApplebottom Indeed indeed

[@MortonGoldthwait]

Where has this movie been all my life? Its not just delicious, its nutritious. Serve with Raiders of Atlantis and Ski Troop Attack as part of a balanced breakfast.

[@ninjawraith17]

37:52 "Fog's getting thicker." *Stephen jumps into frame* "And Leon's getting LAAAARRRRGER!"

[@FanBritLit]

'Mount your horses, gentlemen.' Crow: 'We're not *that* lonely.'

[@AdamG1983]

This show was ahead of it's time. Also shaped/warped my own sense of humor at 10 years old

[@Sestze]

Man, I start to see more and more jokes as time goes on. When I was a child, half this stuff went over my head.

[@mariahardy1201]

Kinda like the jokes in the old Looney Tunes!! 😁😁😁😁

[@sottosopravoce]

Same here! Watching them again as an adult is a double whammy of nostalgia and jokes that are fresh to me now.

[@shelbythomas]

You were much shorter then.

[@AdamWestish]

@@shelbythomas hey bro, you coming at my height at age 19?!? Lol kidding 🤣 I was in college for the first time when these came out and I didn't understand more than maybe ⅓ the jokes. Somehow it's waaay funnier now that I'm going to college again at almost-50!

[@i-a-g-r-e-e-----f-----jo--b]

One of the few watchable movies they did even if not riffed on, thanks a lot for posting all these great episodes! I really appreciate it!

[@particleboy3584]

I do love this silly film, especially because Gary Lockwood's performance here was one reason Kubrick chose him for '2001: A Space Odyssey.'

[@harrisp584]

Tom's Middle Ages rant actually learndt me somthin. Servo has always been my favorite

[@IzzieSciGirls]

Yeah, life back then sucks, but the segment was for fun and Servo is a killjoy over it.

[@MrBuch169169]

You're killin' Independent George, mom!

[@Adamguy2003]

"Well, the gallant Frenchman." "You don't see many of those!" LMAO!

[@floptimus6633]

Crow's musical number was genuinely adorable.

[@idontknow164]

Anyone else notice the "dragon's" roar was the TIE fighter sound effect?

[@cabooseresurrected5183]

idontknow164 I do!

[@daffers2345]

... Now I can't NOT hear it.

[@krispybacon9285]

no but i did notice George Lucas ripped off the dragon roar for his cheesy space movie..

[@SataniaMcDowel]

Omg you're right o.o!

[@yohannbiimu]

No, the Tie-fighter noise was The Magic Sword's dragon roar sound effect. We can thank this movie for it.

[@OneDullMan]

Good movie and great riffs. I heard at least two Princess Bride references.

[@darthvadorthestrong]

This is my favorite episode. Relaxes me like no other ep.

[@LumpsPlays]

"They're not dead, they're just metaphysically challenged." hahahahahaha

[@migduh]

So this is fun: Cambot, a largely forgettable character in the show, is the only one of the 4 Bots to change appearance, and the audience can only observe this during the opening credits, when Cambot films itself in a mirror.

[@phoenixlich]

until you watch the K episodes and you see their prototypes!

[@BlossomHumbleMediaGenius]

"You'll risk the seven curses?" "Hah, LOVE that Carlin bit!" Kinda like how I love this movie. I’m glad we can all agree it’s one of the best MST3k films out there, on its own.

[@astrobiologist]

Thanks so much for posting this. A little MST3K is great for these long nights working on finals and papers.

[@Level1Hera]

Did you become an astrobiologist?

[@cosmobiologist]

@@Level1Hera I did! I studied biology, chemistry, and astrophysics, and then earned my doctorate in geology with a focus on planetary science and astrobiology. I now host the show called “Ask an Astrobiologist” for NASA Astrobiology!

[@Level1Hera]

@@cosmobiologist 👏👏👏 Epic! Congratulations 😃

[@yohannbiimu]

Gary Lockwood was also "Gary Mitchell" in the second Star Trek pilot "Where No Man Has Gone Before."

[@mariakelly90210]

He also appeared in 3 episodes of the tv series version of Twelve O'Clock High.

[@holyirishcoffee84]

I met Gary Lockwood a couple years back, I'm glad I saw this AFTER I met him

[@Hakkai87]

20:07 "Forget about rescuing the girl! Let me give you your presents that will help you do EXACTLY THAT!" Not too bright is she?

[@primepm8861]

Thank you SO much for including the clip of that Adam West commercial in this.

[@adamfowler5475]

I love how casual that sorcerer just walks up in front of the king, and calmly tells the king he locked away the princess.

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

Dude got balls.

[@graemesmith6721]

@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 It's Sherlock Holmes. Of course he has balls!

[@Artjedi44]

I saw this in a theater as a child and recall what a good adventure movie it was for kids. Special effects didn't age well, but the story is still fun and entertaining. Good low-budget effort...I wish I could find a better print for my collection... (But really..."Open the pod bay doors, HAL" cracked me up.)

[@brianbommarito3376]

14:45 The guy dressed in blue calls Basil Rathbone’s character “a worm-eaten sorcerer.” To my mind, there’s something about Basil Rathbone’s villains that make even a worm-eaten villain more frightening than some villains in their prime.

[@GitNthTRUCK]

George- "mount your horses gentlemen!" Crow- "were not that lonely..." LMAO

[@wunkle9523]

Bert I Gordon is still with us in January 2023. He's 100.

[@l.a.gothro3999]

Sybil looks like a prototype of Endora. And Estelle Winwood portrayed Aunt Enchantra on "Bewitched" in 1966.

[@nathanpapp432]

The one thing this movie has going for it is a coherent plot. Its not good, but its campiness makes it entertaining.

[@tbohrer01]

Joel (whispering) "He played Sherlock Holmes that one" 😂

[@angbandsbane]

RIP Bert I Gordon, September 24, 1922 - March 8, 2023. 100 years, 100 laughs via MST3K

[@travissoward5120]

"Mount your horses, gentlemen!" " we're not THAT lonely! " Lolololol!

[@maleacpr]

Out of all the episodes, this one was always my favorite. I remember watching it back in college!

[@AvengerII]

It just struck me that TV's Frank looks like the unholy spawn of Marlon Brando's Jor-El and Frisch's Big Boy...

[@dagonvaldez2878]

you win the internet today.

[@ravensthatflywiththenightm7319]

9:17 A mere boy of TWENTY? 13:32 "No one will be permitted in or out of the palace!" - two seconds later, some new characters arrive inside the palace.

[@shenloken2]

Totally revised version of the legend of St. George and the Dragon with extra characters thrown in not from the original legend. It's like a Bert I. version of a Disney film.

[@88wildcat]

Oh they missed a chance. "Which one is George?" "the quiet Beatle."

[@1daddy57]

"What they call you up there in WAR-drobe?" "The call me Esther Krebs!" LOL!!!!!!!!!!!

[@zenpaganwarrior]

"Mount your horses, gentlemen..." "We're not that lonely!" LMAO!

[@yohannbiimu]

The actress playing "Sybil" also played "Touch Me!, Hold Me!" in Mel Brooks's *The Producers.*

[@ManicIdiot]

Thank you for leaving the Adam West AOL commercial. That was a blast from the past.

[@kathyflorcruz552]

I'm a die hard Joel fan & I'm not ashamed to admit it!

[@analogkid01]

Say it loud, say it proud!

[@vladnefarious]

...and, on your twenty-first birthday, my son, I will give you these six cannon-fodder knights! Lol!

[@MrSleepy677]

Probably the best B-movie the crew sat thru.

[@blampfno]

In case folks are confused, Estelle Winwood was one of three actresses to play Enchantra in Bewitched, she was in just one episode. There was another character named Endora who was on the show more frequently, played by another then-well-known actress named Agnes Moorehead, who incidentally was the giant woman in the Twilight Episode where the flying saucer lands on the cabin, among other roles.

[@andrewfrankovic6821]

Citizen Kane's mom.

[@TheBaljeatles1]

The only good MST3K movie I have watched outside of MST. Love the Estelle song.

[@kevinkettell1092]

basil rathbone dog treats. my mom named her toy shih tzu basil after him. he was so cute.

[@MarkEllinger]

"I am furious, yellow!" Hahaha! Oh, Crow...

[@BingCherry11]

I saw this movie when I was 10 years old. It made no sense to me why Sir George and his Knights didn't simply proceed to save the Princess without telling anyone. This way they would avoid giving Sir Branton a heads up! They would have had the element of surprise at least for a short period of time!!!

[@kingVibe111]

Geez mom, all this stuff was in my room and I never noticed it before.

[@BradyConquersTheWorld]

They came out swinging in this one. Most laughs per episode for me. "Open the pod bay doors, HAL."

[@infiniteryvius]

It's funny that Servo is the one ruining Crow's song in this episode probably as revenge for Crow ruining Tom's song to Tibby back in Gamera.

[@the_hummingbird292]

I love Basil Rathbone--he'll always be the face of Sherlock Holmes for me :)

[@HenryvKeiper]

"Open the pod bay doors, HAL."

[@ClemPal]

Sword and Sorcery theme totally works for Burt, mostly because he doesn't have to have idiots explain all the abnormalities through painfully boring bullshit-science. here, it's just magic.

[@E3Racer1]

They're actually showing this movie, right now in fact, on TCM. LOL.

[@mariakelly5]

Awesome!

[@Guardian978]

NGL, I found the ancient AOL commercial at 59 minutes almost as entertaining as the episode lol

[@ShroudedWolf51]

Wow, that music bit was really well done.

[@pettifoggingpharisee]

12:17 Now for those of you playing along at home, that little blank stare walk by that actress should look familiar. That lady is Vampira whom Elvira is based off of (see the Vampira intro that's floating around KZbin for reference). 😎

[@GenY42]

Vampira, who was also in Ed Wood's Plan 9 From Outer Space, and portrayed in Tim Burton's biopic Ed Wood

[@jamespfp]

43:50 -- "Deeeeep heating." -- No, Joel, No. This sword has clearly been fashioned from the same material as the Glaive, from "Krull".

[@Surfer041]

Memories of a happier more simple time.

[@astrobiologist]

Wow, a commercial for AOL. I remember that crap. So many people had AOL. They sent out those non-stop CD-ROMs in the mail to try to get more users. I feel old. At least MST3K is timeless.

[@abborne1]

This KZbin presentation sponsored by America Online. (But seriously, that Adam West commercial at 59:39 was a treat.)

[@TheAdamewing]

The Adam West commercial out of nowhere made my day.

[@LibbyStein-Torres]

That was the most casual dragon slaying I've ever seen! He just walked up to dragon and shoved the sword in. It wasn't even a slash or a stab, he just stuck it in there.

[@analogkid01]

How's the marriage counseling going? ;-)

[@paulasmith9736]

Petticoat... Dungeon!

[@Atheneastro]

Don't forget Tibby. I think that Servo tends to fall harder in love than Crow does, hence Crow's lighter song here.

[@spicysmalls]

MY. GOD. I've been watching MST3K for nearly 5 years and I just now realized that the acronym for Satellite of Love was S.O.L.................... *smashes face on keyboard repeatedly*

[@davidschwartz6380]

sh-t outta luck?

[@MarcStjames-rq1dm]

I figured that but perhaps as a nod to Lou Reed's song of that title. as well... through that song to SOL ???

[@scottcross2765]

I am not smart too! We are both stpud.

[@waypay1]

​@@MarcStjames-rq1dmMore like Def Leppard's Rocket.

[@sertorrhenclegane]

16:44-17:00 And here I thought Endora was protective of Samantha.

[@jamespfp]

46:00 -- The two or three minutes with the Irish Knight are my favourite. The Irish Knight needs lots of help with the script, and the delivery, but with only a modicum of sensible punching up, why and for sure we could have him talking in a much wider range of vocal registers and trowing around words like "BASTARD!" better than them English ponces, like Sean Bean.

[@mariakelly5]

I like Sean Bean!