MST3k - What to do on a date

Joel and the bots find out what to do (or not to do) on a date.

[@EdgedShadow]

This is how dating in Utah is done to this very day

[@hellodave7526]

EdgedShadow we could learn a lot from them mormons

[@th3r3dr3dkroovy]

Hello Dave like disowning and ostracizing anyone who gets divorced good idea ?????????

[@EdgedShadow]

Nah that's not true, at least of the mainstream (LDS) Mormons. Plenty of people divorce here now. It's still far lower than the national average, but not uncommon at all.

[@CaptApril123]

Utah sounds like a nice place.

[@markusallen5634]

So, if I wanted to date a Mormon girl, how many dates would it take for me to get her out of her magic underpants?

[@popsiclewizard8068]

"She's already seen it." "Hang up."

[@UselessShyte]

I’m not close to kidding, i had to stop the clip to finish losing my mind......that was GREAT

[@daughterofolaf]

This entire short is amazing but that is my favorite part.

[@lisardo]

I was cracking up after that!

[@DrFrankensteam]

Best line!

[@markdaniels7174]

“What if she says no?” (SHE WILL!!)

[@jimsmith4486]

Have you ever had a week when you just need to watch as many of these as possible and remember what belly laughing feels like?

[@Dane_Youssef]

Of course. That's why they exist! That's why this thing was more popular than the Beatles among the comedy-loving nerd-set! And that's why unlike the Beatles... they NEVER WENT OUT OF STYLE!!!

[@elderlypoodle9181]

Jim Smith AND how !!!!!!!!! Xo

[@beccal7133]

This is that week

[@shadetreader]

That’s been every miserable week since Trump stole the 2016 election.

[@am2320LG]

LOVE MST3K! Watch to this day (11-Dec-2022!)🥰💐🤗😆😄

[@SCSsurfer87]

Nick: "What if she says 'no'?" Joel: "She WILL!"

[@Dwigt_Rortugal]

That's the one line I always remember from this!

[@Laceykat66]

Why has NO guy, in my entire history of dating, EVER invited me to a "Taffy Pull" ??? Guys are just not what they use to be.

[@Arrowdodger]

+Laceykat66 taffy is awesome. makes me wonder where people can go to do that

[@eyesofnight]

Want to go to a taffy pull with me?

[@billsmith6884]

+Laceykat66 Lacey, would you pull my taffy?

[@eyesofnight]

chicks

[@billsmith6884]

Women always complain that men have lost the art of romance, yet when two guys offer to help one of them pull taffy the rude thing can't even be bothered accept. I don't think that a date could be more old fashioned than going taffy pulling.

[@outofcuriosity2591]

"My God, Kay's been missing since last February!" Just love how out of the blue it is.

[@TimeandMonotony]

"Kay's worked on the kill floor, she knows where to deliver the blow." Had me howling.

[@somosgenel]

Had me howling.

[@ethanstone2197]

somosgenel wtf

[@starmanda88]

@@somosgenel imagine making a response to a comment from SIX YEARS AGO and it’s this bizarre and unintelligible. You are a fascinating human.

[@AshleyPomeroy]

@@starmanda88 It's fascinating because it almost makes sense. But not quite. That comment will haunt me.

[@metaljacket8128]

​@@starmanda88 It's the screaming that gets me

[@dubbie17]

"Hullo Kay?" "NO!" "How are you?" "...NO!!"

[@rickrussell]

"Kay has worked on the kill floor. She knows where to deliver the blow."

[@billsmith6884]

+Rick Russell Fuck that is funny!

[@linkone11]

Nearly choked on that one, that was sublime

[@rickrussell]

Swimming meets, for example, are very dull.

[@mrjpb23]

Slaughterhouse humor, amazing.

[@monkeymouse]

"It begins with Jeff and Kay" "and a human ear" David Lynch!

[@IWillNOtBeSilencedAgain]

Famous last words: "If this had been an actual date, you would have been told where to go..." CLASSIC!!

[@Dfturcott]

NICK NO!! has become almost a secret handshake with my college friends lol

[@priceman141]

YOU LOOKED IN MY BOOK, DIDN'T YOU?!

[@TheBoomhahaha2]

"I better change my pants" Boy did I miss that one when I was younger...

[@fargocheef]

shiiiit, after watching this countless times over the last 20-odd years, it just clicked with your post lol

[@robertclark4929]

This film is SWELL. Very swell. Couldnt get any sweller.

[@dubbie17]

Robert Clark Robert, you may need a doctor for all of that swelling.

[@internziko]

Keyser Soze hey fellas, we got ourselves a Weisenheimer!

[@billding7073]

+Robert Clark I'm completely swollen!

[@kirk1968]

+Robert Clark Gee Robert, do ya think Kate would enjoy a swell scavenger sale? :D

[@yourmother7052]

+kirk1968 My brain is swelling.

[@DarthTwilight]

"The sensuous pagan ritual begins..."

[@michaelbeaudoin1518]

"This party is getting out of control!" Hahaha

[@UselessShyte]

“June is BUSTIN OUT ALL OVERRR!”

[@janeadelaidelennox7193]

Hey. When you're on a first date with someone, EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE that could possibly mean ANYTHING feels out of control. You've forgotten your roots, friend.

[@sexobscura]

Cue Blackeyed Peas

[@markdaniels7174]

“This place is RAGIN’, yo!”

[@cammameil]

"Kay's worked on the kill-floor, she knows where to deliver the blow..."

[@meganary876]

"You can't inject puberty, it has to happen over time!"

[@ricarleite]

"I was kidding, hang up the phone" One of my favorite shorts...

[@kirk1968]

Same. Great classroom film with awesome MST3K commentary :)

[@UselessShyte]

“MY GOD KAYS BEEN MISSING SINCE LAST FEBRUARY...”

[@christophergargaro959]

The brilliance of the MST3K crew is their ability to take a short like this that doesn’t appear to have many riff opportunities due to the pure dullness of it and provide genuine humor.

[@MrSnazzy01]

"Hello...Hello Kay?" "No!"

[@tomryan914]

"If you see Kay..."

[@robertdiotalevi6073]

Can you imagine Nick on the wedding night? I hope he brings Jeff as support!

[@luisreyes1963]

Awkward...😅

[@robertdiotalevi6073]

@@luisreyes1963 🤮

[@laurallewien2165]

He had to consult the manual......

[@robertdiotalevi6073]

@@laurallewien2165 LL, I think he may have used cue cards, too 😂!

[@carlsaganlives4141]

It's not gonna be a problem, Kay's 'been around the block' before she took a vow of celibacy. Soon to reinstated after the first couple kids.

[@KckStartMyHeart]

"Oh, I thought you were talking to me, sorry!" Lol, I love how delightfully random that was😂

[@kalevala29]

Awkward

[@douggoodfellow8821]

The fun part is the obvious blocking error. The poor girl wasn't supposed to be there, and genuinely wonders if she has a line, or is supposed to respond in some fashion!

[@SandraNevermind]

3:39: "June is bustin' out all overrrrrrrr!" Oh my God, I really can't watch these at work.

[@UselessShyte]

“June is BUSTIN OUT ALL OVERRRRR!”

[@kirk1968]

"...but it looks like it could be fun!" Doesn't it...DOESN'T IT?!

[@s4ujcd]

+kirk1968 I'M CAPTAIN KIRK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@afmghost1759]

Better say yes, dammit!

[@michaelgulick8166]

Kay: "Oh, hello Nick! How are you?" Joel: "I hurt inside."

[@tigercap100]

They should really pull their pants higher.

[@Samus123451]

Hike, hike, hike, hike your pants up!

[@DesertSun0]

This was back before they invented the hips and groin. He's just a torso attached directly to two legs.

[@gummieworms3909]

@@Samus123451 I Love you for this comment😂😂😭😂🤣🤣🤣🤗

[@quantanglement]

@@gummieworms3909 I think if you took these guys and the guys that get arrested on Live PD, then met half way between pant height wise - it would be just about right.

[@Arrowdodger]

All things considered, helmet hair or not, Kay's kinda cute.

[@jimmymurphy7789]

...And she eats her Sammich sooo Sexy !

[@tiffanyb94]

Loving these MST3K riffs of 1950s instructional videos!

[@erfreak15]

"You looked in my book, didn't you?!"

[@nikoincroatia]

Actually this is pretty good advice if you're a socially awkward wreck who has no idea what they're doing. I could've used some of these videos in high school

[@HolyKhaaaaan]

That's what I was thinking. It's mainly the camp style they'd be pecking at, but it seems common sense sound advice.

[@elafimilo8199]

Holy Khan honestly, I think that's Coronet shorts all over.

[@ruffianoo]

Me too...

[@mikezylstra7514]

Me too, except a boy couldn't ask another boy out on a date in my day. You'd get committed.

[@christopherwall2121]

There are, imho, quite a few MST3K shorts that still have good advice today, where the riffs help keep people engaged. Example: there are apparently car dealerships that show the "Hired!" shorts as part of training, since the sales points are still sound, and the riffs make it entertaining.

[@SerrasVictoria]

"It was a good idea coming here tonight, double dating with Jeff and Phyllis." "But mostly Jeff." 😂

[@mcddna]

"you looked in my book, didn't you!?" "what if she says no?" She will. Best MSt3K short ever!

[@douggoodfellow8821]

"Woo hoo! Our luggage is here!" It wasn't until the third or fourth viewing that I made the connection with the "Baggage Checked" sign in the background...

[@julieporter7805]

Okay I am under the impression that without intrusive narrated shorts,,no one would know how to do anything in the 1950's.😆

[@lindacanapp4032]

Festoonery....

[@TanzDerSchatten]

I wonder who took Kay to see "Wagon Train" before Nick could. He probably pushes so hard for that second date because he knows there's another guy out there planning his next move.

[@carlsaganlives4141]

Now Nick can claim the baby isn't his.

[@tr4480]

Jeff was the other guy, the sneaky horn dog.

[@stirnersretrowave5094]

Narrator: A group doing things together... Joel: Hurts.

[@hovanti]

"Are you SURE you like this sort of thing?" What do you want from me, Nick?!?"

[@ParadoxBattleZone]

"... it looks like it could be fun." "Doesn't it. DOESN'T IT?!"

[@simplylogan93]

*smash!* "DENNISSSSSSSSSSSS!!"

[@tdog652041]

Lost my shit at June is busting out all over.

[@KaneRobot]

"I decided to come out of hiding!" "...is she Salman Rushdie?"

[@venicementor2068]

"A weenie roast to learn about give and take."

[@communistjesus]

"A weenie roast to learn about give and take."

[@janeadelaidelennox7193]

Isn't that more a third date thing though? Jesus Kay, have some dignity, sheesh...

[@JHATDRUMMER1976]

hey guys whats a weenie roast?lol

[@luisreyes1963]

​@@JHATDRUMMER1976 It's a group of the popular kids in high school picking on a randomly chosen nerd for an hour. 😆

[@daughterofolaf]

2:44 😂😂😂😂 Servo’s reaction to Kay molesting the phone.

[@TitanTed]

2:25 "Oh - hello, Kay?" "No" "This is Nick Baxter" "No" Makes me laugh every time I hear it.

[@kirk1968]

ICE CREAM I LOVE THIS PARTY

[@luisreyes1963]

You would, Dweeb. 😂

[@markdaniels7174]

My parents met in high school, in the 1950s. They were like George McFly and Lorraine Baines. I imagine they’ve done lots of weenie roasts and taffy pulls (and taffy roasts and weenie pulls).

[@judymarlene3414]

I think I dislocated something laughing so hard…..I hope I don’t run across any more of these….I’ll have to go to the doctor.

[@ericrypt]

Personally? This is the funniest thing MST3K has done, I’ve been watching this damn clip for years and I know that they have a lot of great material but this one short somehow made me laugh the most.

[@nickforbes-warren6602]

June is bustin'out all OVERR!!

[@adiraiju9336]

"I need to know what NOT to do on a date!" I think we all know someone who needs to know that...

[@deafmusician2]

Best line besides the kill floor bit

[@luisreyes1963]

Too late for Jeffrey Epstein, I reckon. 😑

[@OriginalRocketJock]

3:46 "Aaron Copeland throws a party!"

[@calvinmaynardtmt]

Swimming meets -- a perfect excuse to see your date in a bathing suit.

[@FWaNKuS88]

Kaye's worked on the kill floor; she knows where to deliver the blow.

[@TTWackyDog]

Instructions unclear, my actual weenie ended up in the roast

[@luisreyes1963]

Hope your Blue Cross was paid up. 😅

[@tomvalveede6808]

A weenie roast is a Swell idea. It gets us on the topic... LOL 😄

[@lilliangriffin9013]

This is why I'm so grateful that I was born in the 80's.

[@woohan6430]

Lillian Griffin It's the 80's.... do a lot of coke and vote for Ronald Reagan.

[@lilliangriffin9013]

I have to admit, The 80's era had it's flaws. It was a cool time although we had a president that sucked balls. -_-

[@deafmusician2]

70s, here... Good enough

[@deafmusician2]

@@lilliangriffin9013 jimmy carter's home mortgage rates at 11% were considered GREAT rates... Yeah, it was a hoot

[@Schmindrik]

Hugh Beaumont narrating! (Mr. Cleaver from Leave it to Beaver)

[@TimelordR]

Taffy pulls, weenie roasts...overtly sexual, aren't we?

[@bjiadmg]

"With each dial he comes closer and closer to the most humiliating moment of his life." "Kay, Kay, Kay! What about my needs?!"

[@GretaZ-dd3lu]

"How many ways can I say no!?!" cracked me up too much.

[@JamesRDavenport]

Anytime is a good time for some MST3K memories. :)

[@jcb3393]

"Hey, you read the list too!" It was rather uncanny how many of the items on that list she was also rattling off. I'd be worried about a girl who likes to roast weenies, though...

[@KWCline91]

Sign says "Baggage Checked1' HEY HEY! ARE LUGGAGES ARE HERE! WOOHOO!

[@sarahl701]

YOU LOOKED IN MY BOOK DIDN'T YOU

[@steviechan139]

"Would Kay enjoy a bike trip? Or a weenie roast? "Nick, no!" DX

[@F00dTube]

What I love about this is they made the experience look much more awkward than it in reality is. Sort of the opposite of what happens today.

[@DWor-]

See, this is what I keep telling people who are lonely. Get your geek on. Find what you enjoy and not just in media but in activity! I admit that Coronet Film strip (I think it was Coronet but anyway) "What To Do On A Date" was, yes, cheezy. But it makes this same point. We find what we agree on in enjoyment and then celebrate any differences without having to win others over to them! (Still love the jokes added, though.)

[@jillyfern]

I lived in the states for a year in 1994 and I was obsessed with MST3K and this was one of my favourite shorts. I really, really missed it when I came back to England. Thank god for KZbin and Rifftrax!

[@jonathanwashington6083]

Everyone makes fun of this short, but you can learn a lot. For instance, did you know that you can find out what a girl likes, by (gasp!) asking her? What a revolutionary concept!

[@Wombatus777]

Whoa... I've got to... talk... on a date?

[@mrjpb23]

They like the D. What's to ask about?

[@coloneldookie7222]

Nick seemed so shocked that a female like Kay had interests, hopes, and low enough standards to date him.

[@uiscepreston]

You can also find out the same information by stalking her, leafing through her trashcans, picking the locks on her apartment door/diary, and trying on her unmentionables while she's at Lamaze.

[@kettle_of_chris]

This thread is awesome - I seriously laughed at every one of these comments - it's amazing how many funny comments people post on YT; especially on MST3K videos! It reminds me that I'm not as funny as I think I am sometimes. Anyway, thanks to all of those who commented here; you made my day!

[@jjoshaugh]

Still a better love story than Twilight. And Fifty Shades.

[@Soultaker_For_Hire]

Indeed

[@ryanschneider115]

Or Fifty Twilight

[@RanMouri82]

Fifty Shades started as a Twilight fanfic, so that fits.

[@quantanglement]

@@RanMouri82 I thought 50 shades darker had something to do with my email page settings. At least that's what i was told. Were they misleading me?

[@theboombody]

For a long time, this was my very favorite short.

[@deimoskaischylos]

I swear, I've watched every bit of content available for MST3k for season...two or so and onward, watching each several dozen times, and they still never fail to amuse me.

[@anubis1751]

Deimos kai Aischylos Same here.

[@adiraiju9336]

"So, where're they going on the date?" "A taffy pull, they said." "Huh... wait, isn't the neighbor's kitten named Taffy?" "...Shit." (*bolts for the door*)

[@luisreyes1963]

Dude, that's grim. 😧

[@bryanbeck2144]

modern version: Jeff's friend takes girl for himself and posts pics of their sex life on snapchat.

[@joeblow7236]

a comment from 2021 Jeff's friend dumps girl, dates Jeff.

[@griffinhallsey277]

This party is getting out of control!!

[@coastaldeserter]

"With each dial, Nick comes closer and closer to the most humilating moment of his life."

[@scitsalcoryp]

Best advice be Yourself

[@rogersrangers5378]

16 months later Nick's decomposing body was found outside a building in the country. He was found with pulled taffy stuffed into his eye sockets and the words "No More F'n Weenie Roasts" carved into his chest.

[@luisreyes1963]

Thanks for sharing, Buffalo Bill.

[@laurallewien2165]

Susan Atkins future kill there...

[@motosurfninja]

19 people went on the weenie roast date

[@luisreyes1963]

Nick Vitto Hope they sought medical attention soon after.

[@DarkosLjubavi]

Which means.. someone was a third wheel. 🤔

[@mpr3209]

June is bustin’ out all over! This short has me crying ever time I watch it.

[@cultfilmfreakreviews]

"June is bustin' out all oooverrr!!"

[@buhe1]

God, I loved it when they did the educational ones. They were at their best with them because of the material they provided.

[@NathanArnoldCharging]

"...from the lunch menu?!" X-D haha Best short ever!

[@CarryLarry]

1:13 slightly re-imagined, this could be one heck of a slasher movie

[@TheFinalGirly]

MST3K and RiffTrax

[@noc_yt]

GirlDoesRant Love your channel :)

[@SecondOpinionMan]

HELLO FROM THE FUTURE or present or whatever

[@scotthersey4380]

Not gonna lie, shorts like this might've been handy back in the '80s.

[@StanBennet]

Bring this show back!

[@Arthurian_Rabbit]

There's always Rifftrax C:

[@DerickVonD]

***** Joel Hodgson said at a panel earlier this year, that he plans on bringing the show back, but they'll be a new host.

[@dianalewandowski7615]

DerickVonD they need to, there surely is no shortage of stupid movies to tear apart. in the meantime, me and my hubby have been standing in proxy for them until they come back lol

[@Pockehhh]

StanBennet boy do i have some news for you

[@aprilnewton4052]

It is back. #webroughtbackmst3k

[@TheObvious1890]

I think of this as the prequel to More Dates For Kay.

[@fpg213263fu]

And then Kay Does Dallas.

[@cryptiecreep]

Geez, I've met cardboard cutouts with more personality than these kids! Thank you, Joel and Bots, for putting up with such epic blandness.

[@scitsalcoryp]

Ice Cream ? I Love this party !

[@luisreyes1963]

What are you, stuck in the Gay 90's? 🎠

[@tackyman2011]

Tequila and condoms are sure to be a hit, and make ANY date a special occasion.

[@SimonTingle]

Directed by Ted Peshak. Starring Robert Casey. (From imdb). Ted seemed to direct most of these public service / information videos. According to imdb Ted was born in 1917 & died in 2006. Thanks to MST3K 😀

[@ChrisOnStage2]

"Kay has worked on the kill floor. She knows where to deliver the blow." I lost it......

[@nikkidarelli6315]

I was told to watch this😂😂

[@daughterofolaf]

Nikki Darelli You should marry whoever told you to watch it.

[@PugnaciousT15]

08:17 I love how Kay says "Take the CUOAKES out there!" :D