my experience with long term kratom recovery | PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome)

For some people PAWS is the process our brains & bodies go through while healing from addiction. It’s different for everyone, and this video shares my experience with this process.
Ps this is one of my first videos in front of the camera, so I’m still getting used to it lol. Check out my latest vids where I’m a lot more comfortable :)

[@SpencerDrummer]

I’m on day 14 CT. What a friggen bitch this process has been! So happy acutes are gone but man, I’d eat my left hand to get a full 8 hours of sleep. Main symptom for now is just extreme lethargy. For sure some depression too. But I’m never going back so I just gotta keep riding this train. Great to hear it gets better, but knowing it can take a year is tough to hear. I just can’t wait to hit the 30 day mark. I feel like that will be a huge milestone. Thanks for the videos I greatly appreciate it.

[@stillpril8942]

I have been praying to God to give me a sign that I will understand as to what to do about my situation. A few days in and I found your video.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

During my kratom recovery I asked God to use me to shine His light wherever it was needed.. that’s why this channel exists ❤️

[@TypingChimp1]

The power of being honest about a difficult situation is really essential for people to trust what you are saying. Thank you.❤

[@erichthedread4595]

Thanks for sharing so candidly your story. I have been taking Kratom for about 5-6 years. I’m terrified that I can’t quit. I mean, 1 day is all I’ve gone. And it was hell. And I don’t know that I have what it takes anymore to do what is required. I’m 42 and already I’m tired, my strength is gone from me. I am not sure if my 16 year relationship is going to work out. I feel hope has run from my heart and onto the floor, spilled through the cracks. Goddammit. I blew it. Can’t go backwards, don’t want to go forward, and can’t stand where I’m at. Somewhere out there I should have taken a left instead of a right and now I am just lost in the fucking dark again and my light is a faint glow, barely detectable in total darkness. I think it’s awesome that you have found your way out tho. Forgive my rant. I just don’t feel so strong.

[@BulletESV]

Currently on day 30 CT from 8 years of OPMS extract shots, last 4 years were the worst I was doing 4-6 shots per day, physical stuff took just over 2 weeks and now I’m into the mental stuff, it’s not fun but I’ll keep going, well done on your recovery!

[@These-nutz]

How are you doing now??

[@BulletESV]

@@These-nutz I relapsed 3 weeks ago thinking I could do it once, so I need to quit again taking time off work soon, shouldn’t be as bad but the first few days will suck

[@ICYPROFITS]

​@@BulletESV I was doing 12 to 15 opms shots a day for the last year. I quit cold turkey 2 weeks ago.

[@crookedrain771]

Wow I needed this video. I’m 41 days clean today from K. I was doing a heavy dose of about 50 grams a day for almost 5 years. The paws have left me feeling defeated at times.. but to know everything I’m going through is my brain re wiring itself is always a relief. The anhedonia is hitting me pretty hard rn. I have to go through this though, It’s teaching me everything I need to know about myself tbh. Thanks for this video, it’s always nice to hear others who have made it to the other side. 🙏

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey Johnny, Congrats on 41 days! Dude I know it can be rough but like I said in the vid- it does get better. The anhedonia sucks, but it makes simple joy SO much better when it returns. And it WILL return, I promise you. You are so right, this is teaching you so much about yourself. During kratom addiction we are disconnected from that introspection and learning process, and quitting allows us to really dig into who we truly are and what we’re about. When this is over you will re-emerge a better version of yourself. Feel free to hit me up anytime for support and encouragement :)

[@crookedrain771]

Thank you! It’s been really rough but I do feel the improvements SLOWLY. I still have anxiety/blood pressure problems. The anhedonia sucks really hard because I’m an artist/musician and I just don’t have the inspiration anymore. But like you said it’ll all return after the healing has taken it’s place. It’s all a slow process and I’m just taking it a day at a time. Thanks allot for the support. It started my morning off right hearing your story. Gave me hope when I needed it the most! 🙏

[@grace.at.sunrise]

For sure, man! Keep pushing through. I feel you, I’m also an artist & make music as well and I definitely hit moments where I questioned if I was ever going to be able to create again (after quitting kratom and when I quit weed especially). Those substances had really become interwoven with my creative process. But I learned that it’s not possible to lose your ability to make art or music. It’s part of who you are. It sometimes goes into hibernation, but that isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s like hitting a refresh button- so when you pick up your instrument or paintbrush again there’s a newness to it and to your sound and creative style. I believe it’s healthy to take breaks from creating because of this. I’ve also found that switching things up can help- for me, I started playing the keys again after my quit (after playing only guitar for a solid 10yrs), and I switched painting for a digital art designing app on my phone that I could just sit and make things on. Like I was saying in this video, being easy on yourself is important during this early part of the recovery process, so don’t worry too much about your creative productivity right now- it will come back, I promise!

[@crookedrain771]

@@grace.at.sunrise yes, I needed to hear that... On kratom I got into electronic music/synthesizers and I LOVED it but now I can’t bring myself to play it. BUT I have been picking up my nylon string guitar and I felt this newness to my playing. It’s kind of cool. That’s funny you said you started messing with a digital art design app.. I’ve been doing that non stop! It’s called Union.. I’ve made so many digital graphic and design pieces since quitting.. it actually kept my creative juices flowing. It just lacks the satisfaction of doing those huge paintings I loved doing. I just want my nerves and stomach to heal already!! Im getting there though, these last two days I’ve seen a huge difference in my mood and energy, I’m starting to feel the healing..It’s just I never ate much on K and now I eat everything in sight like I’m stoned and have the munchies, so I know that my body is having difficulties keeping up with the sudden change in appetite. I have to be completely strict with my diet now though because I know that plays a huge role in my nervous system, especially when quitting kratom. 😭 I’m getting there damn it!

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I totally understand moving past the sound/style we were into while in our addictions! That’s sweet you’ve been into the guitar (it’s a classical one probably if it has nylon strings?) and have also been using a digital art app! I’m going to have to check that out. I feel you about how it doesn’t compare to big paintings, but you’ll be able to get back to those in due time. I was saying how one of the best things about my recovery process was that it taught me true patience, which was something I struggled with over the years. But trust me, it wasn’t easy! There were times when I thought I had done permanent damage and that I would never be ok again, but it just needed time. I went through that w/ food when I first quit, too! But I was still smoking weed in the beginning and it numbed the stomach/digestion problems I was having, so I literally ate EVERYTHING at first.. prob around 8-10,000 calories a day (no exaggeration). Then when I quit weed I realized how bad my gut was and had to drastically change my diet. Like I was saying I had to cut out most plant foods for a while, it was nuts. Now things are a lot better, but I still can’t have grains, dairy, and sugar. That’s awesome you’re at 43 days! Keep on keepin on, it’s going to get better! The only way out is through but when you get there it’s well worth it!

[@freeindeed5393]

I am 6 weeks off kratom and am feeling so drained. Sleeping better but not great. Mostly I am just exhausted. I have always been able to do physical work all day, and now I am so limited. I hope this ends soon! Going on a vacation with my wife in 2 weeks and I want to feel better.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

It’s normal to feel this way- keep going, I promise it gets better! Hope you had a nice vacation

[@Gonthesocials]

I relate to this channel so much. I’ve been watching your channel for 6 months. It’s been helpful. 3 days off kratom from 6 years of complete a kratom dream cloud. I have to go back to work today and feeling hopeful

[@trevorflloyd36]

Great video. Thanks for posting. 84 days today and been struggling. Thanks for sharing your experience.

[@strubleinvestigations8013]

Thank you for sharing this. I was on heavy opiates/extracts for 13 years, went CT on 1/20/24. Paws is absolutely crushing me.

[@st-qp4mr]

Thank you for being brave enough to do this video..I got a lot out of it

[@marymcgeehan4060]

Thanks girl! The majority I've seen it's going to take a while for me, good to be prepared. I fully expect it to take years to completely heal and feel "normal". I'm on day 11 and doing all that I can! Happy to just be getting farther and farther away from it each day. Thank you for sharing!

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey Mary, you’re doing great! I think it’s wise and I commend you for being prepared for your healing process, no matter how long it takes. Just remember, regardless of how long it’s taking that it will not last forever and is part of the process of you becoming a better person in the end ❤

[@AR-do2ob]

I can't imagine going through paws for a year or more. I am kratom free for about 3 months now, and paws are unbearable. I feel zero joy in life, zero motivation, terrible depression. I am shaking when i go out. So basically im just staying in bed. Well, before noon i do stuff and work, and afternoons i am staying in bed. It's really really horrible. I can't get back to normal life. I don't believe it will ever get better.

[@broganjosephmacduffhealy1940]

How are you doing now?

[@AR-do2ob]

​​Hey, it is definitely better. Cannot even compare how im feeling now to how I felt back then. It took me almost 6 months to "have my legs back", not having them restless anymore. Depression and restlessness are still there, but I can definitely function better​@@broganjosephmacduffhealy1940

[@salpine]

I can tell you’ve put in the work. Thank you for sharing your success and advice with us. You’re inspiring me to rise to a higher place, a place I was in almost 10 years ago after I quit drinking. I love structured sobriety and I want it back.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I love this comment, & am grateful for your kind words. I hear your heart and your desire to be free.. it sounds like you understand the gift that it truly is. Please know that quitting this isn’t easy but it is completely worth it in the end.. & your freedom will feel better than this high ever felt. You can do this ❤

[@stevenjamesgiurbinojr6893]

I commend you on overcoming your addiction, it takes so much inner strength to do so, many ppl don’t understand this, I personally am a Kratom advocate, I take 5 gram servings, 3 times a day for roughly 6 months now, I can appreciate you and others taking the opportunity to share your experience, I use these to keep myself aware of the negatives involved with the usage of this herb, so Thank You 🙏

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi Steven, I really appreciate your comment. I wondered if there would be any feedback from kratom advocates, and I am thankful for your kindness and understanding. I try to communicate as clearly as possible that everyone is different, and some may not become addicted to kratom the way that I was. I also recognize how it helps some people when dealing with certain debilitating chronic pain conditions and to get off harder opiates. I am so glad you are using it responsibly and are aware of the negatives involved with addiction. I was not aware of the risks when I started taking it and wasn’t prepared for what it turned into, which is part of the reason why I make these videos. Thanks again :)

[@randymcadoo8977]

Oh my I'm going through paw's now, it's horrifying, and I don't want to be alone it's truly horrible.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I know it’s scary but u can do this. You are not alone. God is with you even if it doesn’t feel like it. And I have your back as u go through this process. Feel free to reach out in these comment sections anytime. It may take me a moment to respond, but I promise I will. Also check out the Quitting Kratom subreddit for a good community of other people who are quitting or have quit. You can do this.

[@stillpril8942]

How are you feeling now? ❤

[@Anninukichild]

Not alone...on or off the stuff. I don't judge but am here and care. .contact me anytime

[@oliverfoley2553]

Wow, thank you for this. Many Kratom advocates say things like “as addictive as coffee” to prevent its prohibition.. so many don’t know this side of it. For the record, I’m 100% in favor of it’s legality, I credit it with getting off of heroin.. but we all need to hear every perspective. Rock on sis!!🤘 few understand how unbelievably difficult this process is.. and how important nutrition is in ANY form of recovery. PREACH

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi, Thanks for watching and for sharing your experience. I’m stoked to hear you got off heroin. I also don’t want kratom to be illegal, I just want its risks to be communicated openly and honestly. I appreciate your comment and wish you the best :)

[@Stranded360]

People usually underestimate their coffee addiction...

[@joedennig9875]

Wow! I have kind of the same story, except I was on it for like six years. 4 months clean. Thank you you are a beautiful person inside and out.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey! Congrats on 4 months free! Keep going it gets better and better. Thanks so much for your kind words and I wish you the best in your recovery journey :)

[@jasongarcia2140]

Hey how does 5 months clean feel? Im at day.. 20?

[@joshaustin9119]

You said it all. Good job. Been using k close to 10 years..."If you talked to your friends the way you talk to yourself, would they be your friends?" After i heard that question, started being more attentive of the way i talk to myself ...Love those " background woods " (similar to my house,but mine are Fall). Appreciate the articulation. P.s. a buddy had a kratom book,dont remember the name,but its out there. And Huberman podcast Is Dope;)Oh! And if you're reading and youre gonna use anyway,its important to be "nutritionally correct" and not derive all your energy from the kratom

[@shawnkiesel5349]

What really sucks is not having support from the person that's supposed to love and care about you.. I'm diving into withdrawals from kratom alone... It's been 6 years of heavy use so it's going to be hard.. thanks for the video..

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey I was in a similar situation. My kratom addiction really put a lot of strain on my marriage, and my husband just didn’t understand what I was going through. But don’t let this hold you back! Sometimes we’re meant to go through things alone, even when we are in a relationship- it gives us the chance to work on ourselves for our own better good and the better good of our relationship. When you’re through this you will hopefully have the chance to reconnect with your partner in a more meaningful way, the way that I did.

[@Anninukichild]

I'm sorry. Not from kratom but I understand. My wife (a nurse) deals with it and kinda understands but doesn't fully understand because she hasn't been there...And I truly thank God she hasn't. Sometimes feel like she's the only one holding us together...it's tuff...its tuff..but we are working threw this together COMPLETE honesty is key. Might not seem that way at first but it's a start. And they can't truly get it until they get the truth

[@tylercromer1362]

I'm right there with u, going through it alone. Day 5. Heavy heavy does everyday for 10 years

[@KRATOMBACONSTOPPIT]

@@tylercromer1362how you holding up? I’m getting ready to make the jump CT It’s been 2 years 16 capsules every 2 hours and haven’t skipped a dose At this point it’s nothing but negative effects. I’m so tired and the withdrawals are brutal so yeah im scared but need to do it

[@stillpril8942]

Im so happy I found you. Ive been taking k for pain and anxiety for 6 years and even at a very low dose I can't quit even though its not helping. Its making me worse at this point.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey sorry for the delay in response! I’m so glad you made it here. A lot of us have felt this way. Please know it’s possible to get free. I’m here for you anytime u need support and encouragement , my email is in the channel bio ❤️

[@Anninukichild]

Same with pain meds right?

[@banksta3]

When I "quit" 2 years ago, after about 2.5 years of abuse, I had a low grade headache for 2 days and maybe some aches and pains. That was with me using about 10 g five days a week. Even a year and a half ago I stopped for a month when I did some hardcore fasting, and I didn't really notice much in the way of withdrawal. But since then I've been using some over the counter extract five to six days a week. 5 days ago in an attempt to lose weight and feel better, I started intermittent fasting and eating low carbohydrates. With this, I cut out caffeine and kratom as well. I've definitely been experiencing what people describe as PAWS. The aches, headaches and joint pain are bad enough, but can be managed with ibuprofen and whatnot. The overwhelming sense of dread mixed with apathy and despair, That's a little worse. Nothing I can't manage though, I've been meaning to do a dopamine detox myself.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Thanks for sharing your experience. Extracts are pretty tough to quit from what I hear! Please know what you’re experiencing now will not last forever. I also quit caffeine and have been doing lower carb, high fat, meat based diet for years now and it’s changed my life! Wishing you the best :)

[@therapeuticeating]

caffeine withdrawal in and of itself is rough - adding kratom and fasting in takes it to another level. Just be sure not to torture yourself too much too soon! Major props tho!

[@GoodVibesOnly1914]

Yeah caffein withdrawl was harder for me than 5yr 15gpd kratom in terms of actually being a productive human at work and such. I can pretty much work through the whole kratom withdrawl

[@Read..Matthew-11..28]

Hey, I have looked here on YT for Christians suffering with trying to get off kratom and I could not find anyone. God has given me hope through your videos. I can relate to pretty much everything that kratom did to you. My mom and I are trying to taper off because God is urging us and kratom is really destroying our bodies in numerous ways. I was wondering if maybe you could elaborate on how you got off kratom with God and how He helped you through the process and maybe the things you noticed that He did for you during that and what helped you. Thank you for making these videos you are making a difference sister! God bless you🙏💖

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Dear Sister, I apologize for the delay in response. I’m so glad God has led you to my videos! It’s truly all because of him that I’m free from kratom and why I make these videos. I’m sorry to hear where you and your mom are at, and I know the negative effects of kratom on the body and mind all too well. Yes, I would be honored to make a video going more in depth elaborating about my process and how God lead me through. I’ll post it in a few hours. Please keep in touch and feel free to reach out anytime at [e-mail].. I will be lifting you both up in prayer as you move forward in this battle for your freedom. Please don’t forget that God is faithful and capable of anything!! With love in Christ, Rebecca Ps. I’ve also been thinking about starting a prayer group on zoom if that’s something that might interest you.

[@Stranded360]

www.youtube.com/@gimmeyoursnacks here is another channel of someone who quit kratom as a christian I am always conflicted on it as well- I've quit but then the things it helps with show themselves again and I remember why I take it in the first place but I pray anyone who wants to quit is able to with Jesus and the guiding hand of the holy spirit.

[@ajbucks]

Kratom addiction is very similar but also very different to Opiate addiction (morphine, Percocet, Vicodin, codeine, Fentanyl) etc. The addiction itself, the good feelings, and withdrawal process are similar. But what makes the Kratom very different is that’s it’s 100% legal in most states and can be purchased almost anywhere. Since it’s legal, it can easily tempt people because technically, they feel they’re not doing anything wrong. And because it’s legal , people think to themselves that’s it can’t be too bad for you and it’s probably fine. Unfortunately, some of us know from experience that Kratom addiction and withdrawals are pretty much the same as opiate addiction and opiate withdrawals. I’m all for Kratom use but only for 1 specific reason. If someone wants to use Kratom for a short time (months, not years) to successfully get off harder substances, then I’m all for it. The issue is if the person doesn’t get off the Kratom in a timely manner.

[@konasweetdreams]

I am a Christian and I have been struggling for years. It's been 12 weeks of tapering. I can go a full week without it. I still struggle with the thoughts and severe fatigue. But God has given me so much hope and strength. I just can't go backwards. Blessing in disguise is so true....God is good!!!

[@christianharrison919]

I just left detox a week ago i could not handle quitting cold turkey the withdrawals where some of the worst things ive ever experienced in my entire life, its been almost two weeks since i last used so ik my body and psychology is still healing

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I respect your choice to go to detox. Regardless of what anyone says, this stuff is no joke. So glad to hear you’re free. Yes It’s going to take some time for your mind and body to heal, and though it isn’t easy, please know that it’ll be worth it in the end..

[@meowmeow-le7mp]

Great video. I could relate to you very much! Kratom killed my mind,body and soul at the end...had to quit. I hit bottom.❤

[@mattt2094]

I just quit kratom like 6 days ago and the body aches are real as well as feeling tired, it makes me just want to take those convenient extract tablets again, but I'm sticking to this and I'm never taking that crap again. I really hate that I did this to myself, but I really need to do this

[@raymundoo2879]

you're not alone brotha we're all gonna get thru this shit, have to have the right mindset. We decided to go this route so now we gotta pay the consequences but it will make us stronger in the end!

[@mattt2094]

@@raymundoo2879 absolutely!!!!!!!!! I'm a bit over 2 months clean now and it feels so liberating for real! I'm so glad I finally made the push to quit. It was nothing but a crutch

[@Moogatoo]

10 years heavyish daily use. Had to quit cold turkey after Kratom started having very unusual and bad effects. Couldn't take even a little bit without having severe anxiety and chest pressure. Currently 15 days without Kratom. Chest pressure persists, anxiety/depression. Visual focus issues and pins and needles in limbs. Fatigue and all that too. Anyone else have any experiences like this?

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey, welcome here and thanks for sharing your experience. I was only on kratom for 3 years, and the beginning of the 2nd year it took a turn for the worse. I experienced everything you described (& more), but continued taking it for the rest of the year before tapering off the 3rd year. I think at a certain point some of our bodies just start rejecting it, especially after heavy use. That’s awesome you quit and are at over 2 weeks free! Unfortunately it’s probably going to take some time for things to regulate and feel better for you, based on how long and how much you used. But hang in there, I promise in the end it will be worth it!

[@diegotejera2742]

Ty. Was on the same mission for months

[@Moogatoo]

45 days off of Kratom. PAWS symptoms seem to be worse than ever now. Physically ill and anxious all of the time. Heart and blood pressure are all over the place. Its hard to do anything physical without being completely wiped out. Hope I can do this.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hang in there, it doesn’t last forever, I promise. For me, the long term recovery was harder than the actual quit. But it makes reaching the other side even sweeter.. I’m here if you need encouragement ❤

[@Moogatoo]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thankyou so much! I really appreciate your videos. It's hard to find people who understand what Kratom is, and what quitting it is like. It has definitely been a tough time, but I look forward to being able to look back at this time in my life and be stronger for it.

[@AR-do2ob]

How are u now?

[@Moogatoo]

@@AR-do2ob Still struggling with anxiety, may be related to the Kratom or its just something I would have anyway. Been off Kratom since January of this year. Doing better though I guess. Improvements are very slow, but they are there.

[@Bill_Dippertly]

I’m almost a month into tapering (almost cold turkey at first) I still feel terrible. 8 years at 60g a day and before that 10 years of heroin and painkillers. I am feeling much more pain from pinched nerves and muscles which really sucks but it’s better than being on kratom that made me look horrible and always sneaking around to take it and actually ruined relationships when the girl im seeing finds out. Waking up next to a girl sick as hell and they don’t know why trying to play it off like im ok but I could not function without it.

[@JackieSalvato-fz6kk]

Hi I'm tapering . I hope I get through this . Your videos are helping me . Thank you so much . Jan 25th 2024

[@bradywilson3560]

I have the "Dopamine Nation" audiobook. Great book. I also watch Andrew Huberman podcast regularly. I seen the one with Anna Lembke too. Great info.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey Brady, thanks for watching. I really learned a lot about the neurochemistry of addiction through Anna Lembke and found it super valuable in my own process. Hope you have Happy Holidays :)

[@bradywilson3560]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thanks. Happy Holidays to you as well. =)

[@marymcgeehan4060]

I think I comment a lot but I love Huberman Lab, going to rewatch the Anna Lembke episode. Im in this for the long haul but my husband is quitting kratom Friday and I feel like I'm almost going to have to be his recovery coach as he has had a 20 year journey now with addiction.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Thanks for your comments, Mary- You are welcome here anytime. I commend you for supporting your husband ❤

[@ricknowak4582]

"interaction". That describes me best! While on this Kratom! I absolutely HATE it when my PHONE RINGS !,,,!!!! I AVOID people as MUCH as I can! Nice vidie.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi Rick, that has gone away for me since quitting thank God! I appreciate you watching:)

[@armandoruiz8478]

Hi Rebekah, thank you for sharing your journey. I am 8 months clean from a five year addiction taking 13 grams per day and was wondering when your energy returned. I am chronically fatigued since K and find it hard to get out of bed every morning. I have no motivation, my legs are very weak. I understand that everyone is different but I am curious as to when you got your energy and motivation back and if your legs were ever weak.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi thanks for being here & sharing where you’re at. Congrats on 8 months free! Yes I felt chronically fatigued and weak as well, and it lasted about a year and a half. I know it may feel like it’s going to take forever, but hang in there- it does get better eventually 🙏

[@rapdichotomy]

Thank you for this. My biggest fear is will I ever be like I was before I started taking kratom. But the way you said the color of the sunrise started to come back, gives me confidence my Brain will heal itself. Right ?

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey there, I’m glad you made it to this channel. I totally understand the fear of not being the same after kratom addiction, because I often felt this. And I learned after going through this process that everything heals. But in the end I actually wasn’t the same again.. because it made me a better person than who I was before. & That’s cool that how I explained the sunrise colors coming back resonated with you. That’s what inspired the name of this channel (which is also the name of my music project). Please don’t lose hope that there’s a way out of this, and know that freedom is better than you could ever imagine..

[@rapdichotomy]

@@grace.at.sunrise thank you 😊

[@thomasscott2639]

I'm in my 3rd week and every hair on my body strands straight up. It is so frustrating to deal with the anxiety when it rises up from the body in this way.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey Thomas, I’m glad you’re here. Please know it doesn’t last forever ..

[@kathleendinsmore7588]

I advocate for keeping kratom legal and for lifting the ban where it exists in some states. That being said this is a supplement that needs to be treated with a great deal of respect. Kratom, like alcohol, can be used responsibly but it's important to be aware of the potential for dependency.

[@outtosea25]

Do you also consider the opium poppy a "supplement"? I'm sorry, I find kratom advocates to be oblivious to reality at best, at worst profiting from kratom while pedaling gross misinformation and suffering. Coffee headache my ass. I'm sick of it.

[@kathleendinsmore7588]

@@outtosea25 Opium poppy contains a substance that's potentially addictive for sure. My position is that making everything that poses the possibility for addiction Schedule 1 only drives people to the black market where there are no regulations at all and let's be honest. The so-called war on drugs has been a disaster.

[@outtosea25]

@@kathleendinsmore7588 Like all good kratom advocates you've dodged my actual concerns with tone deaf responses about the drug war - my patience is exhausted. Kratom is already unregulated, that's why these highly profitable leaves from SE Asia have heavy metal contamination - who knows what else - that nice little salmonella outbreak in 2018... That's why it's sold by anybody and their mom online, in gas stations, sex shops - the shadier places in society. Kratom is more comparable to the opium poppy than coffee beans. That's why one of the most heavily marketed and popular kratom brands is called O.P.M.S. Misleading people to believe it's like coffee, or a supplement is beyond sleazy and is classic snake oil sales. The public policy fellow of the American Kratom Assn Mac Haddow has a shell company sucking up money from the AKA. Mitragynine and 7-hydroxy-mitragynine have been identified as "atypical opioids", there's affinity for the mu opioid receptor like buprenorphine. My wife said I'm a subhuman monster when dependent on kratom, I'm a better more stable person on suboxone. Yes, kratom addiction led me to prescription maintenance opioids because I didn't have the time to go through the withdrawals. Call kratom what it is - the same as any other opiate. I don't care if the plant is related to coffee, it is not coffee. Kratom gives euphoria, pinpoint pupils, constipation, possess your body and soul - huh, pretty similar to the heroin I used to do. Call it what it is.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I appreciate you sharing your stance on kratom in a respectful way.. many advocates don’t do that. I also believe kratom should be legal, but its risks should be clearly communicated, openly and honestly. Like alcohol or cigarettes.. though completely legal, we all know about their health risks and potential to be addictive. I believe it should then be everyone’s personal choice to use it responsibly. Quieting or outwardly denying the risks associated with kratom is extremely dangerous, and a lot of people end up causing a lot of damage to themselves, their lives, and others because of it. Thanks for your comment.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

@@outtosea25 thanks for sharing where you’re at. I agree with many things you said, and you have every right to feel how you do given all you’ve been through. Wishing you the best in your recovery journey

[@alexanderp8037]

I got severe gut issues because of kratom, horrible constipation and hormonal problems. Yesterday i had unnatural extremely high libido and complete erectile dysfunction. Today i had such severe constipation i thought i needed to go to the hospital. I just had to stop. I tried tapering twice and failed so i'm doing a slower taper. This year i already stopped 2 addicting meds the paws was so severe i started using kratom to relieve the paws but now i have to beat another withdrawal on top of the others. Kratom simply stopped working so i don't really have a choice

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I feel you- check out the video called “kratom wrecked my gut!”

[@Careabout211]

Your articulate video sounds excellent. I am just starting to take K. I like your idea that each person is different. Unfortunately, after 60, on Oxy 20 yrs, Suboxone 1? As you say? “ The brain rewires?” Not really. At my age and long use due to cancer, I’m just very skeptical I’m too old for that to occur when I am at a level 10 pain , could not dress myself. I live w my elderly father who isn’t helping. What you’re saying about losing your social skills happens when you’re in a bed unable to even roll over. But peace to you, you’re an obviously very intelligent woman ❤️

[@mohdpaijam9630]

im from malaysia i had 4 kratom tree back at my home.1kg just 3day for me,been using ten year,it so hurt i can't sleep.need to drink again.what about suboxone??those thing help??

[@tacthemac1366]

When did that adrenaline panic feeling finally go away for you? I’m not getting it anymore like in the early stages (Day 75 now) but I still have trouble with tanning out in the sun for more than 20 minutes, working out too intense, caffeine etc, as my heart rate still goes up some from that type of stimulation. I also only did 10gpd for about 5 months. Thanks for this video.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi, congrats on 75 days! It’s different for everyone, but for me everything took some time to regulate, about a year. But I was using much more than you for a much longer amount of time. Along with the things you mentioned, I also was getting that reaction from sugar and anything that caused stress.. but the good side of things is that it allowed me to overhaul my life and help me let go of stuff that ultimately wasn’t the best for me. But the 2nd and now going on 3rd year kratom free, everything is back to normal again. I still don’t drink coffee, eat sugar, etc but I can do much more that was overwhelming before.. keep pushing through! It gets better, I promise!

[@tacthemac1366]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thank you! Would you say that panic feeling lasted the entire year? Or did it slowly fade? Yeah I stopped coffee the first week, and probably won’t go back for a while. Caffeine I tried and that didn’t work with the WD’s either. Congratulations on making it this long. Do you think you would feel OK if you were to do caffeine now? Not that you should, i’m just wondering if that would effect you now.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

@@tacthemac1366 hi, it happened off and on during that first year and slowly faded into the second. I became severely malnourished and under weight during my kratom addiction, so I think that played a huge part in it. The more weight I gained and the more I nourished my body, the more calm and balanced I felt. I ended up trying caffeine again last year by having green tea and matcha for a week last year, and the matcha made me have such a horrific experience, I knew I couldn’t have any caffeine for a LONG time. I felt SO bad from it- panic, overly sensitive to stimuli, anxiety, it dried out my skin, it even made my gums hurt! So I haven’t had any caffeine since then. I loved the taste and feeling of coffee for so many years and have often wondered if I can ever have it again, but I know right now (and maybe forever) that it’s not worth it to try it again. The benefits of quitting caffeine that I’ve had far outweigh what I ever got out of it! I’d recommend checking out the book Caffeine Blues for some really eye opening truths and info about caffeine- it really helped me see it in a different light and accept that I don’t want it my body or life anymore. I’m so stoked on your quit and am here if you have any questions as u go through this process!!

[@tacthemac1366]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thanks for explaining your experience in detail. It sounds like your system didn’t need the stimulation anymore. I guess I just wanted to see if you had any restrictions or reactions this far into your quit, which you did so that is interesting. I can drop caffeine completely I just don’t like the idea of being able to never take something again that helped in the past. I wonder what the science is behind not being able to consume it again after Krtm. I will look into that book. I’m sure caffeine can be harsh on adrenals anyways overtime, and krtm already depletes the adrenals so i’m sure caffeine will only exacerbate the problem. I’ve been doing mushroom hot chocolate and that’s been helping with waking up, and not jacking up my system. I would look into that if you haven’t already found something. It helps with brain cognition. Again, thank you for taking the time out to explain everything. I’m sure in time, we will both be able to enjoy a cup of coffee again. Lol. Congratulations on making it to the other side! Take care.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

For sure! It’s cool to have crossed paths with someone in the same boat. I’m not sure exactly what’s going on but I do think it has to do with the adrenals as well. I will look into it more but that’s one of the hard things about kratom research, it’s very difficult to find anything that goes into detail about the negative effects, especially the long term ones. This would be a cool topic for a future video that I think others could relate to so stay tuned for that! Mushroom hot chocolate sounds great! For me, vitamin C and citrus have taken the place of caffeine. I find that it gives me a noticeable boost in energy and focus with no crash. I take a large dose of liposomal vit C every day, and use citrus fruit and camu camu when I would drink coffee. Dude but I’m not going to lie- I still miss coffee. And out of all the things I’ve quit in my life- drinking 13 yrs ago, kratom, weed, coffee, & sugar- coffee is the only one that I can’t say I will never do again lol! But for me the negatives that it gives far outweigh the positives right now. And at the end of the day, it is a psychoactive addictive substance that effects my brain, body, and life, no matter how legal or accepted it is. So I try to keep that in mind when I smell its delicious aroma or walk by a coffee shop lol! Thank you & congrats to you on getting free as well!! :)

[@MissAmericarules]

❤❤❤❤

[@EdWard-ie5wn]

When I first kicked kratom I would actually eat like raw meat, raw eggs, raw dairy etc. And it realllllllllly healed my body. I looked like a totally different person

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Dude, yes!! Meat was a huge part of my healing process!!

[@EdWard-ie5wn]

@@grace.at.sunrise I would actually drive to a local farm and buy gallons of raw milk.

[@alexanderp8037]

I've had paws but i never fully recovered from it. When i quit antipsychotics i was severely sick for two years and i never fully recovered, lost my emotions permanently. I hope quitting kratom doesn't give me a similar situation

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Paws definitely suck and can last a while- for me they lasted about a year and a half. But they do eventually lift, and can lead to a deeper appreciation for life in the end

[@MysterCannabis]

"The true moments of joy I began to feel were way better than the kratom highs ever were". Really? That's the part I have trouble believing right now. (I'm on month 2)

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I would have had trouble believing it as well on month 2 after quitting.. but hang in there, it will get better. unfortunately it takes some time for our brains and bodies to regulate after our addictions..

[@MysterCannabis]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thank you Rebecca. I came back to your video to listen to it again. The part where you were reading your thoughts has become my mantra, I wrote it down verbatim and read it often. "It’s easy to want to search for a cohesive timeframe that this will last, which is often met with disappointment and hopelessness because it feels like it’s going to last forever and there is permanent damage done." is the part that hits home the most. I have always relapsed because of this exact thinking pattern. "I'm fucked anyway so I'm going to buy myself a year of life by taking kratom until I have to quit again". I'm a very ambitious person so accepting idleness for such an extended period of time was never something I was ready to do. Your video made me realise that the timeframe I was considering was way too short. I wasn't feeling ok after two months and always concluded that I will never feel ok. Month three of my recovery starts today and I'm not motivated to do anything beyond bare minimum profesionnaly but I already rediscovered my interest in playing music which I thought was dead forever. Thank you, I'll probably revisit this video again in a month or so:)

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I love this comment.. thank you. It’s awesome to hear the realization and self reflection in it. I know this isn’t easy right now, but it’s all about being patient and not losing hope. You can do this, man!!

[@atlasbaird2314]

Did post acute withdrawal include joint pain for you? Is that a symptom that can occur as well

[@sega_saturn4life590]

Ice baths or cold plunges has helped for kratom withdrawal

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I do them, too!!

[@karldanger44199]

Longest I quit for was about a year and then I started it in 2020 after a surgery becUse I mentally justified it to my self that I would rather take that then the day or 2 of tramadol they gave me.. Then 2 years since we're rough and alot of things I tried to ignore would come back sober which makes a person say, fuck this

[@Anninukichild]

How u doing now? I haven't started taking it yet.. used it for a few weeks a long time ago but don't remember it helping a whole lot other than energy boost.

[@barquilleromusicdurecorder]

Hello I don't know if I got lost but how did you start consuming how and why

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi, I initially started taking kratom for chronic pain and to help with grief from the loss of 2 close family members. I was studying herbalism at the time, and came across it during my studies. Everything I found when researching it said it was harmless and non addictive, so I sourced it out. That’s the how and why :)

[@Anninukichild]

I wanted to get out of pain management...thought this would be the answer 😔may God have mercy on me

[@grace.at.sunrise]

A lot of us ended up on it bc we thought it was a better option than pain management :(

[@Anninukichild]

@@grace.at.sunrise it's not? Or 2 sides of same coin?

[@grace.at.sunrise]

@@Anninukichild it can be an alternative to pharmaceutical pain management, and can be a better option for some people- depending on the person and their circumstances. But kratom comes with its own risks and side effects that should be considered as well.

[@johnstover4584]

Id rather have this stuff because it can't be shot smoked or snorted. I've been taking kratom for 10 years. It got me off of opiates. Im scared if i quit i will go to worse things.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

I understand and respect that.

[@AR-do2ob]

Depends...if I was lets say after 50, I would have never quit kratom. But im 39, a rather critical age to have a child, get pregnant. I can't imagine getting pregnant being on that stuff.

[@karldanger44199]

You were thin you said so it wouldn't work but water fasting Is a great way to speed up the detox of it because it's a substance that is fat soluble

[@stevenkyle2313]

Wellbutrin helped me quit kratom

[@bobbycecere1037]

I still don't know what anyone means when they say Kratom high. I've never experienced a high. There are times when I feel good, Particularly in the morning when I'm driven. And then throughout the day if I accomplish certain things and Kratom allows that Because otherwise I wouldn't have to drive, I feel good. But I've never felt good just because I've taken Kratom alone. I have to actually do something in order to feel good. What that tells me is the normal process of dopamine release for activity is what is causing the feel good Emotions. Kratom is just giving me the energy to accomplish these things.

[@EdWard-ie5wn]

It's an opiate dude. It's going to have an effect on your brain. Plus there's a ton of other alkaloids that we don't really understand

[@bobbycecere1037]

@user-bx8hh9zb2j Sure. It's technically an opiate in that it attaches to opiate receptors in your brain. What she describes here as PAWS Is the normal procedure any person will go through with any psychoactive substance. That doesn't answer my question though. I've been using Kratom for more than 5 years now. What's this supposed high?? If I do too much all that happens is my heart races, my head gets foggy, I have trouble focusing & I don't feel so good. Pretty much the opposite of what we call getting high. Granted all biochemistries are different. I just don't understand describing this as a high. I've been high. MANY times on many drugs! This isn't like that. All it does is get me moving. Make me want to be productive.

[@EdWard-ie5wn]

@@bobbycecere1037 yeah meth also makes you productive. It's a drug. Just because your tolerance is so high you don't get high anymore doesn't matter. It's bad for you

[@bobbycecere1037]

@@EdWard-ie5wn All psychoactive substances can be bad for you. You're not really teaching me anything.

[@d.menace9256]

Drink responsibility

[@wendythomas4420]

How long was your dopamine detox?

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hi Wendy, the brain needs a moment to rewire during the detox, so 1-3 months is a good amount of time for most. For me, some aspects of it lasted a month or so, some for longer, and some have become permanent changes in my life.. because the things that used to give me that dopamine fix (like social media, sugar, and caffeine) weren’t the same any more after my own detox process.

[@wendythomas4420]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thanks so much for the info.

[@gavinsandlin27]

Kratom alters everything with your body. It lowers PH in your body as well so it takes time

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Hey Gavin, thanks for your comment. The ph aspect of kratom is interesting, and something I didn’t know about. since it is an unregulated and often untested substance with many different active alkaloids that have not been studied thoroughly, I think that there are a lot of ways it effects in our bodies that we don’t even know about. For me, it caused a lot of damage to many things physically and mentally that took years to repair.

[@carlosirizarry5312]

I don’t understand why the people say Kratom addiction I using a lot of shit but Kratom don’t feel nothing nothing nothing is like baking soda

[@HCheatNcool]

We have been eating meat as long as we have been humans, I’ve never understood the argument that eating meat is in someway bad for us

[@matttorrence2900]

What is Kratom?

[@jochannan7379]

The taste of kratom is just so disgusting. I can't imagine being able to ingest 40-50 g per day.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

Dude it’s def disgusting. Trust me it sucked 🤢

[@jochannan7379]

@@grace.at.sunrise When you started taking it, were you aware that there is a risk of addiction? Did you take any precautions? A couple of days ago I heard a scientist saying that they have found that tolerance generally doesn't develop when you take under 5g per day. I would assume that when you take it in moderate doses once or twice a week you should be on the safe side, although even that might depend on your personality.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

@@jochannan7379 hi, when I first came across it and started taking it almost 6 years ago, I was studying herbalism and thought I had a pretty good understanding of it beforehand. All of the research I did said ‘it was no more addictive than coffee’, but there was nothing about any risks. Since it was natural, I didn’t see it as being harmful in any way at first, and I didn’t think I had to take any precautions. As far as taking smaller amounts a couple times a week and it being on the safe side- I think it depends on the person.. I’ve heard of people taking very small amounts (a gram or so) and it developing into a dependency and created withdrawals when quitting . But there are different factors involved in why this happens.

[@jochannan7379]

@@grace.at.sunrise Thanks! When you say, you didn't take any precautions, does this mean you also didn't have second thoughts about using it daily? Or did you try to limit your use in any way? I know of a couple using it two times per week and after six weeks or so they take a two weeks break to make sure that they haven't developed a tolerance. They seem to fare well with this rhythm.

[@grace.at.sunrise]

@@jochannan7379 hi, yes I didn’t take any precautions and didn’t think twice about using it daily. I was using it for a chronic pain condition and to try to help with navigating the grief from the loss of two close family members. So if circumstances were any different, I would have probably been more conscious of how I was using it, or I would have never even tried it at all. That along with being under the impression that it was a legal, natural, herbal supplement made me think it was safe, which were big factors in my habitual use of it.

[@EazyDuz18]

hot

[@SuperPussyFinger]

Everything about this video is spot on, except the diet advice.