My friend was ABUSED for 10 years: The Trial of Dovydas

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: [phone]
I have a serious conversation with my friend about his 10 year experience and the challenges he faced.
Dovydas KZbin Channel: / @dovydasmusic
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[@SGWChaosteam]

Heads Up. Going through a similar Breakup. Was questioning myself so much. „Did i do the right thing breaking up? Did i get something wrong? Was it my fault?“ Listening to you helps me to believe in me. Girls and Guys… speak to your friends and listen to them. My friends and family saved my ass before i fully started questioning myself. They gave me the strength to move on and the love to repair and love myself again

[@seanwilson9117]

Yes, and if that person is trying to separate you from family and friends, there's a reason why.

[@MichaelRei99]

Let’s not forget that there are two sides to every story. Let’s not take everything you hear as gospel truth.

[@eldaremington341]

But silence partly caused this issue to go on too long. Lots and lots of talking will be necessary to heal.

[@eldaremington341]

Dovydas spoke with a great deal of care.

[@seanwilson9117]

@@MichaelRei99 From what I'm hearing I tend to believe him. He's not going out of his way to make her look worse, in fact he's been quite kind in how he's approaching this. There's no hyperbole or being over the top and it's not as though he hates this woman, he's just thankful it's over and it sort of matches up with my experiences.

[@JaredDines_]

I've always loved Dovydas' music. He's always having so much fun in his videos I never would have thought any of this was going on behind the scenes. Just goes to show you never know what people are going through.

[@freddyray6805]

The best always put on a brave face and drown in the social shame and stigma that a "strong male" can't be abused by a female partner.

[@jackiestrobel4328]

Feel so bad that narcissist got under dovys skin. He did not deserve to be treated so unfairly!! He looks so great now!!

[@colinsansom5924]

This has shaken me up too. Dovydas, is an incredible musician. highly talented. You guys are both amazing in this video. Thank you for sharing.

[@lilyofthevalley5586]

Hi Jared! I thought the same as well.

[@pd9605]

A true professional leaves their personal baggage at home and why the world should only know your personal business when you choose to share it and then only for the good of others. What an amazing story!

[@grantgoodyear4146]

Dovydas Handled that interview with class... respect... maturity... humble and great attitude.

[@tonimariehurley]

I watch him regularly and noticed a change in how he looks, he has lost weight, has a new glow about him, and looks happier. I wish him the best in his career.

[@officialWWM]

I thought he was transitioning.

[@sentientcardboarddumpster7900]

Dudes gonna blow up even bigger now that's he's free

[@yotu9670]

I thought the same he is damn attractive now :D

[@dycook]

He looks so much younger now. Your experience has been like being a frog that starts off in a pot of cold water and is gradually boiled.

[@mindsigh4]

@@officialWWM u joking? i thot may be drug effects, withdrawal. so, in spirit of one ups-man-ship, just exactly how many instruments are u badterrible at?

[@bobcole612]

He is an extremely talented musician, but what strikes me most is that he is a good, decent man. Good on him for telling his story.

[@Rob_TheOne]

In a homeless shelter, kicked out by my narcissist wife. Verbally abused for years. Brought me to suicide many times. Finally escaped. With you bro!

[@gnarrrrrrrrrrrr]

stay up bro the hardest part is over 🤍🤙

[@joshuataft5541]

Blessings to you 🙏

[@DM-of7ys]

Keep strong brother

[@DarrenWaters75]

Keep your head up brother.

[@BenTrue75]

Part 2 of life for you, great things to come. Just keep off any booze & drugs, cause it wrecked some of my family!

[@jimdixon9822]

Dovydas, I am a 75 year old man and have had many life experiences I can say to you " I am very proud of you" You have many accomplishments, your music speaks volumes about your life and please stay creative. I love your morals statements and the world needs more like you. I listen to you every night and find happiness as I rest. Your future life will be a fun place for you with plenty of love and friendships. Keep on playing.

[@Angelhorselady]

As a 71 year old Grandma, I totally agree and understand! I have enjoyed David since the beginning and am so proud of him just like my own Grandson. May God bless you and give you a prosperous and peaceful long life!🙏❤️

[@elizabethmountain525]

She sounds like a very strict mother controlling her child. You can only go out when/where I say you can. Twelve years older is way too much difference in years especially if the woman is the older one. I

[@elizabethmountain525]

Glad you escaped and never let anyone control you again.

[@JL-uv1ms]

@@elizabethmountain525 Amen to that! She was a Narcissist..... now he will have freedom of thought , feeling, spirit and will be able to create more, artistically and maybe down the road find true love... love that doesn't criticize, hurt or control ... easy and smooth unconditional love!! ❤️

[@trutsieo5430]

She grabbed him because he was young & away from home. His heart wanted to be with one person & trust her. Congratulations to Dovydas for moving forward with no bitterness. I hope he continues to grow & not allow someone else to replace her & be abused again.

[@jacquelinehecht7256]

So glad you got out of that abusive relationship Dovydas, you are such a talented guy

[@JL-uv1ms]

My Dear Dovydas... I am an older woman going through a divorce.... I have no family or children... I want to speak to you as if you were a son. You are extremely brave to come on and talk about this. In my eyes it doesn't have anything to do with being a " real man" ! Only a real man would be confident and strong enough to discuss this situation. I am so glad you did because other men and women need to hear this for inspiration. I was an ER Nurse , and supposed to be wise enough to know the red flags... some of us trust and believe in the good in people. Until I went through it and looked back,and realized how controlled I was, and how after the honey moon phase had some very bad instances, of physical violence due to temper tantrums,did I understand how bad things were.! You were the survivor that escaped a Narcissist !! You were gaslighted manipulated, isolated ,censored and controlled like me .... none of this is your fault!! You are a good person who believed you were in an honest,loving, relationship and you could work through the hard times . You didn't really have family or friends for support ,or to use as role models. You were kept from your friends.... isolated... and I bet any friends you had ,she found fault with... so you would drop them... because that's what Narcissists do, control!! Constant arguments too that they always have to win. Narcissists, put the blame on you for anything that goes wrong,even if it is blatantly their fault,,and make you feel such guilt and shame as if, you need to fix things ! Please don't blame yourself ....and thank God, you are young enough to one day find real love...and don't worry about labels like co- dependency most people who are in a close Loving relationship can have a little of that...just a loving heart in yearning for closeness and love.. I am older and want real love, I feel all my young years were wasted Loving and giving everything to someone who just used me.Maybe late for me....but for you... Someday.... your compassionate, kind heart will heal... you will feel the warmth of the sun, your heart will open again, and you will look into the eyes of your beloved!! Don't push though,take time to heal,you will have time... and keep doing your music.... by the way which I love, and keep singing! I was a serious singer before I became a Nurse and had a few great offers... my wish before I leave this earth is to make a CD... Keep the faith... I know in my heart, you will make it!! 🌹PS I think Lionel Richie if I am not mistaken, was in a very similar relationship.... sending you blessings🌹🌹 oh and I am that one person,who listens to all your videos...😊Love Jan

[@ZodiacGallery]

Thank you for your kind words and love!

[@psashikumar3638]

Dear JL ✨🌈 well said... Thank you for the kind words and support 💗🙏🏼 for Dovydas 🤗✨💖 true Love does not have any age limit ❤️ I strong believe one day you will find true Love 💕 live rest of life your life like sweet princess 💓 Take Care JL ✨ always stay blessed 💖

[@JL-uv1ms]

@@psashikumar3638 Thank you, dear heart... Bless you too! 🌹

[@rosemaryjackson3679]

🍃🌸 So beautifully and wisely written. “ALL Life .. is a Journey.” 🎵

[@psashikumar3638]

@@JL-uv1ms Your welcome Dear JL 💖✨🌈🌼🙏🏼 Always remember innocent, kind and full of love hearted people 💖 gets pain 💔 and suffering by the our near and dear once 💕 but they don't know that this makes us inside strong and more kind, loveable.... Take care JL 💖 always remember your God's special child 👼 and always blessed... ✨🌈 Wish if I was there i would have given you a Big Hug 💖 from the universe... 🌈✨🌼 Love you dear JL 💙💜🤎🖤🤍♥️💚❤️💓💗💞💕💖💐🌈✨🌼

[@psrwhite]

Thank you Mike for giving Dovydas a safe place to reveal the truth, and set the record straight. Dovy is so gifted as a musician and one who brings so much happiness to so many people. Dovy, I wish you all the happiness in the world. You deserve only the best life has to offer!!

[@MrDovy]

As a Lithuanian, a Healthcare professional and the one person who watches the videos - it takes balls to talk about this especially the background Dovydas comes from. ( many men suffer in silence, especially in Lithuanian culture : "be a man" ) Escaping a toxic long term relationship is not easy, especially when it has entered a marriage. The fact that he carried on his music and growing his channel trough this emotional roller-coaster deserves huge respect. Dovydai, jei kada busi UK - einam islenkti alaus ir pajaminti! Respect. Mike, buy this guy a beer next time you see him.

[@williamjowell3644]

Thank you, Dovydas! I'm 86 and you have put me on the road to admittahce and healng! Thank you!

[@shieldmaiden1318]

This needs to be talked about. I think the Johnny Depp trial opened some eyes. Men might be physically different and stronger in that way but their psychologically just as fragile as women, maybe even more so bc they’re expected to shoulder a lot of things silently and alone. God Bless you Dovydas.

[@peggylocke1016]

Thank You Sean for giving Dovydas a platform to speak of his most difficult time. I have followed him for years because of his extreme talent. I have always been impressed with his ease of English. You would never know he came from Lithuania just 10 years ago. His very adaptable diction is spot on just as his amazing musical talent. His coming on to talk about his toxic relationship makes him more of a real man . Wow you just never know what goes on behind closed doors and you have that one person who watches your videos cheering you on . 😢 please keep loving your Floridians we love and support you wherever you are in the life. Please know that there are some amazing humans out here. We love you Dovydas. Stay Strong in mind not just body. ❤

[@lolawants2008]

A lot of Floridians have been the ones saying some of the worst judgy stuff though, unfortunately

[@yakncast7530]

There's a sh*t load of people born and raised here that can't speak English as good as this man.

[@francescoideo9330]

damn, what makes this worse is the fact that Dovydas really seems like the sweetest guy ever

[@davidleipold593]

Thats the type covert narcissists target.

[@robinjohnston222]

"when you're in it you don't know it" so well said.

[@williamdunbar8554]

I went through this in '05/'06. That was after 26 years together. In that time we went from church mouse poor to a comfortable 6 figure income, two honor role kids, and a lake house. Then it suddenly seemed like she pulled 2 grenades out of her pockets and destroyed everything. It's taken time, and the help of others, mainly my pastor, but I have come to grips with it all and healed. I know what Dovydas meant concerning culture. As far back as my family tree can be traced there have been no divorces, so it was quite new territory for my family to deal with. Between her and her 2 sisters, and their Mom there have been 7 divorces. Quite the well seasoned team aye? I wish I had known that back in '83 before I said "I do". Thank you for sharing Dovydas, and thank you Mike for correcting those of us who were perceiving things the wrong way. ~shalom

[@Yenneffer]

Thank you Dovydas for opening up. There's a lot of stigma around abusive relationships, especially for men, so it must have been difficult to come forward like this. Looking from the outside, leaving before things get that bad might seem obvious, but toxic people have the ability to make you question yourself in every way possible and somehow turn things around to where you're blaming yourself for a lot of it. I'm so happy that you were able to get out and that you're in a better place now.

[@whiskywings]

This 👆🏻

[@charlysteenstevens9314]

These days we've got what we call "Karens". We've all seen them in action. They're loud highly verbally abusive, hysterics. Notice that they are not "Mike" or "Tom". Almost all of them are women. Society doesn't recognize them because that would be *politically incorrect (we only want to talk about men as the abusers).* My mother was so verbally abusive that though she never killed anyone physically, that I know of, she would say such horrible things in her frequent rages that you ended up wishing you were dead - over and over and over again. As far as deceitfulness and dishonesty goes men were her favorite target. I'm 73 years old, and a great-grandmother now, but the abuse I suffered at my mother's hands is something I've never been able to fully get over. I have fought hard against the self-hatred she implanted in me one word at a time, but it has nearly ruined my life. I'm so glad I never had a brother because if he were treated that way, and he would have been. he might have turned out to be one of those serial killers that murder their mother over and over again with each new victim. *I'm dead serious.* We have got to address the fact that women can be abusers too and that *it's not uncommon.* The devastation they create affects all of us in society.

[@Noneymar1]

He seems like such a gentle soul. And also: Nothing is more impressive than speaking out about such things. It doesn’t make him less of a „man“, it’s just really strong.

[@mistercleantm5667]

Thanks for giving Dovy a safe platform to talk about this. Nobody should feel forced to stay in a relationship where they aren't comfortable.

[@rose-maries7131]

This needs to be talked about A LOT more... My ex was in a similar situation before we met. There is a HUGE underreporting from women in abusive relationships. But I'm sure it's even worse with men being abused. So THANK YOU. For your courage. And for help spreading awareness. 🙏🙏🙏 Whishing you all the best, all the way from Sweden.

[@cupacoffeemate]

Thank you for this. My son also escaped an abuser this year. It is a real problem happening to so many men. My son had also called 911 a few times and a judge denied a court order for his protection because he weighs 200 lbs vs her 100 lbs. He is safe now and happy. Thank God.

[@alcoholicsensei]

He looks healthier now and putting on some muscle like I am. I am happy that he isn't in a toxic relationship. I used to be in a toxic relationship in the past, I almost gave up on everything. I remember walking to the beach and heading straight to the ocean, not knowing how to swim with a beer in my hand. Halfway, I broke down just thinking how my family would've felt if I had died. So I left her and started my life over from zero, and now I am traveling all over the world. I couldn't be happier, but now I am staring my own youtube channel to share my love in hopes of inspiring others not to give in. You are super talented, my dude, and I wish all the best things.

[@bobbywest8460]

Thanks for this. As an original Dovy fan and dealing with my own 25 years of abuse. It was very timely…

[@row_sea]

Wishing you the same as do for DOVYDAS & thank you for reading my long arse comment to him & your kind reply to me. Am so very for your own abusive situation & pray you've either already escaped from it or will quickly, if not? Sending love. 🌹

[@laimaz6340]

Labas ! 🇱🇹I survived an abusive relationship …that dragged on for almost 10 years. He was a charmer -to the world. At home , a monster. I’ve escaped , by the grace of God and am in a beautiful, loving marriage . Prayers for you , for soul healing! Make your music Dovydai , make your life ! ❤️

[@bogawoga7487]

Respect for supporting your friend and respect to him for being able to talk about this

[@leslietiwari8625]

I did hear your wife making a comment on one of your videos say something negative about someone and I immediately felt that she was being nasty and it didn't jive with your persona of such a cool and talented guy. She seemed negative and controlling. You are a very sensitive talented guy and you deserve a partner who matches you and trusts you. I'm glad you are doing better.

[@J.OKRoadrunner]

Those Narcopaths really enjoy trying to destroy our light! It’s not a common trait nowadays ( Kind loving and giving Spirit)

[@leone.6190]

Poor Dovydas. So sorry for him. He so often brightened my day and impressed me with his music. To know that he went through this all while being one of the best entertainers. Crazy. I wish him the best and much love. I am glad that he had such an protecting Angel like sean and has friends where he can seek help and love. 🙏

[@eldaremington341]

Brave he is.

[@bryanwalter5752]

Good friends like that aren't easy to find anymore. Well said

[@jakeconnelly2441]

This title gave me a heart attack because I thought someone was accusing Dovydas of abuse. Been watching him for a year now and he always seemed like the most genuine guy. So glad that he's out of that situation.

[@Budget-Guitar-Show-DM]

Hello, fan! Thanks for reaching out congratulation 🎁🎊🎉You Won a (Flying guitar )Cheerful send a message above to acknowledge your prize🎁❤

[@Will-xf3qe]

Right? Lol that's literally how the title reads

[@mindsigh4]

ya, click baity as hell, the guitar with frets looks (on my phone) similar to height hash marks for mugshot, but it got me to click & it's a trip to see the changes, i hope the woman also makes some changes, sounds like hell to be in her mind & shoes

[@nayaleezy]

Only his guitar could say that ♥️

[@freddyray6805]

I found doydas' music around 3 years ago, when I was going through the same thing. I used to put it on and just fall asleep. Helped me forget some stuff. You know when you are in an abusive relationship many times only when you leave and you realize that you are a lot happier now.

[@davidleipold593]

I am an admin for a fb group dedicated to Narcissistic Abuse Support. Our male population is only around 7% in a group of approx 12k members. One of them recently posted this interview with Dovydas. As a male who has been through my own private nightmare, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate his willingness to openly and effectively articulate the perspective of a male in such a situation. In my case, it was increasingly difficult to be open about my experience because she was actively promoting her narrative that I was the abuser. Something which is apparently easier for people to believe. Again, I want to thank you both for putting this out there and welcome Dovydas to join our group should he be willing to help others and understand the role of the abused in such relationships. Thank you both and I wish Dovydas peace, success and freedom from any future toxic entanglements.

[@lukewoodworth2101]

Great job Mike helping a friend talk through some terrible things

[@joykslouha4527]

Yes, what a friend and not a short piece. So glad he’s been out of that a year. Hope you get and keep a restraining order. Be strong stay safe, be aware! Live your life as you want. Best wishes. And so so sorry you went through all of this.

[@mulcogiseng3175]

Here's another 75 year old man saying thanx for having the courage to speak out. This is great for me right now as I'm going through my own experience right now. I've been following you for some time, street corners to large venues. So happy for you. Can't wait to see you live! I'll bring my wood flute just in case. LOL

[@matiosmi137]

This could've happened to any one of us. And let's take into account how insecure one can be at 19 yo in a foreign land - that's basically me now so my sympathy goes to you. And kudos for the courage to step out of it and to be outspoken! Also, I wish it were my first car! Good for you!

[@1bepresent]

My husband and I adore him! So thankful he’s safe, free and on the road to recovery!! Huge fans and supporters for life!

[@peggyhix293]

From here on out listen and be mindful to the red flags. Do not second guess yourself . You seem like a gentle soul and that is what narcissists go after❤️

[@nimblesymbols]

Thank you for this interview. I'm one of those people who mentioned how nice he had fruit brought to him by a "supportive" person in the chat during the Covid concerts not realizing what he was going through. I'm so sorry he went through it for a decade. I hope the next few decades can bring him the peace and joy he deserves. Stay strong and aware.

[@sandrahardy5418]

Very brave of Dovydas to talk about his abuse. He is amazing!

[@LJ-uq7eh]

I’m so impressed with Mike & Dovydas being able to have a realistic tough conversation without a bunch of BS! Dovydas is so respectful even though he was put thru hell and Mike was so considerate of Dovydas. Congrats to both of you for a perfect involved interview that was done with exceptional class

[@bazamere]

Its great that he was able to talk about this online and Im so happy he did, I think we need to normalize men talking about their struggles and emotion more. As a woman I feel men coming out sharing their struggle with being the victim of DA doesnt take away from womens struggles with DA. It in fact strengthens it because its not just a problem for one sex, its a problem for us all and we need to start thinking of ourselves as human first, not based on what we have between our legs. I hope he continues his journey of healing and surrounds himself with supportive people 💛

[@DavidLucky7teen]

Bravest, most authentic and cathartic decision to finally speak your Truth, Sir! ~ It’s your experience and your nine years in the belly of the beast, Dovydas! *I too am a Creative who lost a decade to a similar darkness. Yet somehow we do eventually push through-persevere, and reclaimed Our creative light. *One day, you may come to understand it.. Perhaps even accept it. I have, and in time, you too will realize you’re a stronger Man, and Creative Spirit for having endured it, Sir. 🙏🏼PEACE TO YOU, DOVYDAS🙏🏼

[@shazzynaughtygirlsmusic]

Im so sorry this happened to you Dovy. Thanks for sharing two men talking in this vulnerable and respectful way. I wish you every happiness ❤

[@thatsandgirl3046]

Wow! What a horrible situation. We just never know what someone is going through unless they share with us. Very brave to speak about this. So glad Dovy has found love.

[@EL-qo7we]

As a woman myself Dovydas I have to say you are a truly genuine, loving, caring, and tolerant man with whoever you were dealing with. Kudos to you speaking out and releasing yourself from your mind and heart space. It is rare to hear the pain in silence within from men out loud. It is a strength not a weakness to be heard. We all need to release what is not serving us in order to share our love communicating with giving as well as receiving. Releasing opens new paths and opportunities to move forward. Love n Light lift your spirits. Love your videos and your talent! 👍 it keeps us dancing!💃 🕺 🤼‍♂️

[@helga4791]

Your weakness is your strength. What makes you vulnerable and susceptible to being led astray is also what makes you likeable, and relateable and charismatic and draws inspiration to you. I have been following you since 2018 and you and doing art kept me sane in 2020. Had no idea the livestreams were during such a painful time. I appreciate your perserverance. Glad you escaped, thank you for this backstory.

[@lenalambe8136]

It takes vast amounts of courage to come forward to talk about being abused especially as a man! You are so gifted musically which in itself opens up your soul and to have endured this abuse speaks volumes about your sensitive soul! Heal, Dovydos and keep bringing your ,musical joy to this world !

[@MusiciansIgnite]

I feel for Dovydas. Went through an abusive relationship for a few years, and just watching this made me want to hug him. Thanks for sharing this, I hope others stuck in those toxic relationships use this as fuel for escaping!

[@jarjamz5916]

Wow, "Amish Whip" hits different now!

[@Beitlet]

You never know what is going on in someone else’s life. I’ve enjoyed Dovy’s amazing talent as a musician & never would have suspected this. Just assumed he was living the best life, touring around sharing his music with people. Good luck Dovy, you are going to be ok!

[@trippmoore]

crazy huh. weird knowing if you ever sent a heart emoji during a live stream that it was likely the catalyst to abuse

[@brigitteclark5477]

So glad you got out my friend. Enjoy your life :). And thank you for the music! You are super talented!!

[@sandramoricle7485]

It’s hard as a mom to let her kids grow up and be their own people. We are afraid for them for not only this reason but so many others. My own son was in a similar relationship for 6 years, and I feel sorry that he dealt with that in the same silence as you. I can relate to how your mom felt.

[@butterflygarden9098]

I didn’t know this. I am so sorry for you, Dude. My heart goes out to you, Bro. ❤😢 You’re very brave to come out and talk about this. Respect.

[@SpeakLife733]

I am sorry you were hurt by a controlling, toxic person. Thank you for sharing your story. I am glad you are in a better place and will continue on the road to healing. I wish you all the happiness because you are an authentic good person with an incredible talent that the world needs to hear. 🎶🎉⭐️

[@lionheartmerrill1069]

I'd like to hear her side of the story.

[@patriciaburke2401]

Thanks so much for sharing this message. I am so happy for Dovydas, that he sought help and was brave enough to leave an abusive relationship. I was in an abusive marriage for 13 years and I regret staying so long. Dovy, Your story should certainly help others to seek help and value their lives enough to escape. I’m a senior citizen and I wish I was as wise as you are when I was young. I spent many years alone. I lost trust in my own judgement regarding men. I wish you a wonderful life and thank you for sharing your amazing talents and your personal story. Take care and may God bless you always.

[@lynnb-TruckCastreauJr]

Thank-you, #Dovydas, for telling your story. I just convinced my friend Jerry to escape a very similar experience with a neurotic and controlling woman. She did the same thing with the constant surveillance of him and his actions, and also monitored his phone and social media. He was not permitted to have ANY contact with another woman, for any reason, not even for business purposes. Congratulations to you for seeing what was happening to you within the walls and supposed security of your own home. Keep being YOU. 🥰

[@4dogsannacat]

She must have tripped everytime he went to the gym. Glad you got out and sought out professional assistance.

[@beefree4769]

I'd noticed that Dovydas looks better now. I'd noticed he had changed his rings around again. After this interview I realize why he is blossoming now. Best wishes for the future!

[@samanthajade6042]

I'm so sorry you went through that awful experience Dovy. You deserve the best!!! You are a great person. Love your music. Rock on!!!!

[@kingtarkus4895]

Oh my god. Dovydas???? Legit the most humble musician on KZbin.? I could never picture anyone treating this guy like shit, but it really goes to show people will do anything to anyone at anytime, no matter what perception you have on someone. I've been through a rough relationship of emotional turmoil and manipulation, and I hope you find whatever means necessary to heal my friend.

[@WindRider1]

Dovydas, listening to your story reminds me so much of a time in my life. I too got involved with a woman that transferred in to my work. I was married at the time. She moved in on me after hearing I wasn't happy with my home life. I fell hook, line, and sinker. I divorced and moved in with her. Like you , I noticed subtle actions but chalked it up to her being in love. The longer time went on, the worse things got. We worked together, lived together, was together 24/7. I fished when we first met. I was no longer allowed to fish with my buddies. I had to fish with her. I sold my boat because I couldn't handle it anymore. I had raced dirt cars years before I met her. I decided to build a race car. The first night at the track, she met someone with a race car for sale. Different class. We bought her a racecar the next day. After a few years racing got too expensive. My brother in law asked me to go play a round of golf. I had played in HS and while in the Army. The next day we went and bought her a set of clubs so I would have to take her along with me. There was a job posted at work on a different shift with different off days. I saw this as an opportunity to escape the over possessive person I had invested 10 years of my life with. When I got the job she asked if I was going to accept it. I said I was. She then told me if I wasn't going to work the same hours and off days as her, then I would have to leave. I dont think she thought I would do it. It was the best decision I've ever made. I totally understand how you feel and I'm proud you too ESCAPED a toxic situation. Good luck. Love your music.

[@thresagraham8181]

I am really happy you managed to escape, hope you doing great👍🌻

[@WindRider1]

@@thresagraham8181 I am doing fantastic. I am the happiest I have ever been. She passed away last month. I went to the funeral. Her Sister and I were always very close and she welcomed me with open arms. She asked if I would sit with the family, which I politely declined. I didn't leave because I didn't love her. I left out of necessity. I kissed her on the forehead, told her I loved her, and told her goodbye.

[@MarvinCZ]

I'm glad he's in a better place now. And I hope that time and better circumstances manage to heal the wounds.

[@romeoslover817]

Dovydos.. You are a hero. Many people are or have been victims of gaslighting and abuse and are afraid to get help. You did, and a survivor because of it. The public’s opinion’s of your personal life doesn’t matter. It is none of their business, like you guys said in this video. Stay strong, you do as you do so well. Your music helped me through the covid lockdown as it has for so many. Take care. I wish all the luck and success you deserve in your future.

[@agems56]

The best that comes out of all this is all the support for Dovidas I see judging by the comments! A lot of women take advantage of men that would never strike back physically, or argue and yell back! I've seen it numerous times in my 67 years! Women yearn to be the ones wearing the pants!

[@fookingsog]

@DØVYDAS Thanks for being HONEST and GENUINE!!! You DESERVE *ALL* of the Greatness and Happiness you are Able to Attain!!! 😁👍🏻 HERE'S TO NEW BEGINNINGS!!!🎉🥂

[@garywhite6900]

What a blessing to be free of that abuse and find your strength and freedom in having gone through it. You've been there, done that, and moved on and grown beyond ever repeating that again! It is just one chapter in your book of life and you will have many more to share with the rest of the world. Thank you Dovidas for all you have already brought to us!

[@seanwilson9117]

It's wild that he's still at the point where he's like 'Well, professionals tell me it was abusive.' Nah, man. It was abuse. It's ok. You have to come to terms with what it was and realize you were in love with a person that they could be rather than who they were. Someone you never met, aside from the brief times they fit into that role long enough to keep you chasing the dream.

[@thegreatsauna2347]

Sean I agree that his statement was 3rd party edification of a professional but it’s a healing process to fully accept that it was abuse at a heart level. I was wondering why people were making comments on the new girl he posted on KZbin. It’s a sad commentary that so many judged Dovydas before trying to understand what happened. I was wondering as well what happened with his wife. I am sorry that Dovydas experienced abuse and pray for healing.

[@luella2u152]

It's sad that generally people don't understand that men can be victims of abusive relationships. My son's father was abused by his wife. Later in my life, I had a relationship with another man who was abused by his wife and her friends. The misperception is that men are the abusers and women the victims. It definitely happens both ways. The old saying that you shouldn't judge a person until you've walked in their shoes, certainly applies. Thanks for sharing your story.

[@ammoalamo6485]

My mom died at 74 after a long marriage to Dad. He didn't know how to live without a female caretaker. Sadly, instead of finding an intelligent and kind person like Mom, he was reeled in by a woman who had already buried two husbands and was looking at the equity in Dad's home to give her more financial security. She abused him horribly, not physically but mentally. She managed to turn his kids against each other, and when he died at 89 with only a worthless handwritten will she took the life insurance money he had trusted her to distribute equally to the kids, and kept it for herself, all the while proclaiming far and wide about what a good Christian woman she was.

[@luella2u152]

@@ammoalamo6485 I am so sorry that your family had such an awful experience.

[@LiL.Pixxie]

My husband's ex wife was so verbally (and a few times physically) abusive during and after their marriage, he would cower and flinch if we had a disagreement; not a fight (we really don't fight but we do disagree) but just a difference of opinion. He would immediately start apologizing if he saw he may have said something that I didn't like or upset me. He would abandon his hobbies and interests in an attempt to spend more time with me because he thought (from her conditioning) my hobbies and interests took importance and presidence. He also would tell me everywhere he was going, how long he anticipated going, who would be there and encourage me to go to verify. I was patient and understanding (I also have a Master's of Arts, Psychology....so it wouldn't exactly be fair to say I did this without the experience and education) and after a few years built his self worth enough that we could have a different opinion, he can and does have hobbies and interests and we spend a healthy amount of time together vs every waking moment (that was getting annoying). He now takes NO BS from her, he will absolutely advocate for himself and refuse to allow her to become absuive on any level. She still tries but he shuts it down, without fear, right away.

[@catherinewilkerson718]

Dovydas, my respect & awe for you continues to grow by leaps & bounds. You are so gifted, intelligent & musical genius. And so young!! So brave & confident. So humble, kind & sweet. God blesses you, His angel on earth. So glad you stay pure with no drugs or alcohol or evil habits. I love Chezzarai & hope things work out with her. She is very special as well. Thank you for sharing! ❤️❤️❤️

[@seanwilson9117]

There are so many of us who have face abuse that we can't comfortably talk about for fear of feeling weak or looked at as liars or less than somehow. I also wasted years of my life being mistreated physically, emotionally, and sexually by a woman who controlled me in every way she could. Set it up to where I couldn't make court for a traffic ticket and lost my license. Had her ex husband scrap my car as he owned a towing business (while she slept with him ). Bless Dovydas for sharing his story and empowering men trapped in similar situations.

[@johnzinkowski6834]

Dovydas = Kindness, intelligence, empathy. Your sweet humane power lifts all of us and provides hope. As always, thanks for being brave and vulnerable. P.S. It's OK to also take a rest any time you need self-care. We'll carry-on until you return.

[@beckymays1677]

So glad I caught this. I watch Dovydas all the time. I’ve noticed a big positive change in him the past 18 months. I had no idea (why would I) he was going through such hell. He should have all the happiness. A decade of any kind of abuse is 9 years 364 days too long. Best wishes to you, Dovydas!

[@williamross3539]

Thank you for sharing. Glad you came out on the other side. You escaped. Now, stay healthy in body mind and spirit. Life is a gift. Thank you

[@wolfgangkirby6820]

I’m glad dovydas has the strength to speak about this . I’ve been following him for a long time and seeing him grow and succeed is inspiring

[@GypsiesandInk]

Abuse does happen for men as well. I have a friend that got into a really bad situation, which I tried talking him out of before it got so deep. Which I recognized the signs because of my own prior experiences of being abused. It is really sad for him now, and it takes time to recover and heal. I appreciate you sharing this to help men going through this. Abuse is not acceptable regardless if it is a woman or a man.

[@Budget-Guitar-Show-DM]

Hello, fan! Thanks for reaching out congratulation 🎁🎊🎉You Won a (Flying guitar )Cheerful send a message above to acknowledge your prize🎁❤

[@psrwhite]

Thank you Dovy for sharing your story. You are way too gifted and talented to let anyone hold you back. I'm so glad you are moving on. I hope you continue to share your amazing music with the world on your terms!!

[@Cro-mos]

Very important topic. I've been dealing with the aftermath of this for over 4 years. It get much more difficult when it involve children. I'm happy you are out of your toxic relationship. We focus on the physical abuse but the emotional abuse is just as bad if not worse. Borderline and Narcissistic personality disorders are some of the biggest issues we need to address as a society.

[@crystals14acregarden61]

Dovydas...I can't even imagine leaving my family and going alone to another country. That requires extreme courage. This is you. I've done the paperwork for a few neighbors from Mexico. I know that for them, it takes a long time to complete. I hope, for you, it doesn't take as long. When you are an honest person, it's hard to accept that others may not be as honest as you. When you open your soul to another, on a personal level, it's difficult to step back again. You have taken that hardest step. Your wounds will heal. You will be somewhat different on the other side. Thicker skin. But more cautious. Take it slow. Take the time to really see a person before you fully commit again, but still allow yourself to enjoy your life. I sincerely hope the new person in your life is good for you. Every mistake we make, is part of who we become. Don't regret too much, but don't look back

[@lisagruber4469]

Hang in there Dovydas; it’s your life, you got this! I think your future is so bright, your music is amazing. Now your wise from experiences. Your sharing of your endurance is heart felt. Sending prayers your way, for a happy future.

[@jokevv1]

Sorry to hear that Dovydas had to go through this, but happy that he got out of it. I had no idea that there was a 12 year age difference though.

[@BigLeBowski4456]

12 years.. and toxicity.. He was 20 and she was 32, that's pretty much her hunting on easy prey.

[@annnaegele1846]

Dovy is a hero for speaking out about this! You are a beautiful, amazing human being. Love ya!💕👍

[@seandaniel23]

Love to my guys!

[@joepaquet4332]

Thank you!!

[@joepaquet4332]

Can you share this with Eric Carroll

[@laineybird1076]

Dovydas, I am so glad to hear you say you spoke to a professional. It is so important to work through the psychological side. It is NOT unhealable. At all. I am living proof. I WAS a victim once. But I learned a lot about myself, grew, and have moved forward. Rock on...

[@jphillips4509]

Dovy, I didn’t think I could respect and appreciate you more than I already did until this video. You are a rare gem. I’ll be praying that God shows you His purpose for your life and that He protects & heals you everywhere you hurt. Thank you both for this video.

[@psmith535]

Such an interesting man. Absolutely overflowing with talent. Thank you for opening up and sharing this. I am shocked to the core, but then again I completely understand. I remember thinking how beautiful your wife was and how fortunate you were to have met her. On the outside it seemed like the perfect match up. So interesting to finally know the truth. Good luck with your future endeavors. You are truly an amazing individual. You are truly one of the greatest talents to ever bless this amazing earth. I wish you the best in all you do.

[@Budget-Guitar-Show-DM]

Hello, fan! Thanks for reaching out congratulation 🎁🎊🎉You Won a (Flying guitar )Cheerful send a message above to acknowledge your prize🎁❤

[@Vro-]

I enjoy Dovydas music so much and the joy he spreads to so many. I was married at 19 to someone who turned out to be exactly like this. There was so much I blocked out but when I came home one night and ended up with hands around my throat, I got lose and never went back. I can't stress enough to anyone who is involved in a relationship like this, they never get better, only worse.

[@MrDalebenberger]

Dov, took a lot of guts to come out with this. Not a lot of men would let it out. You did what a man should do. Hope the wounds heal.

[@sandrastover299]

Mike, I would like to commend you for being such a good friend to Dovydas, and for giving him the opportunity to speak about this very personal and private issue. This is the most heartbreaking video that I have ever tried to watch and I'm still crying as I type this message. I love Dovydas and his music, and have been following him for a long time now (I'm that"one person that watches all his videos"), and he has always seemed very humble and appreciative of his fans. I'm a little embarrassed to say that I've never watched your channel, but from now on, I will also be that "one person that watches all your videos" as well. Much love to you my friend.

[@eunicejames5330]

Thanks Mike for having Dovydas on.

[@CedricsSpecialLP]

Honestly, every time someone gets out of an abusive relationship, they should be able to get an interview that is uploaded to KZbin. Everyone in that situation deserves to be heard. Those of us who have never experienced such a thing would also be able to know, how often something horrible like this happens. THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW!

[@eldaremington341]

Take care to continue to protect the person who escaped. It will take a while to heal and watch out for the possibility of a relapse. It is very possible to cause a very great and wonderful song.The healing might cause all the bad thoughts to fly away.

[@elishanagle1732]

Thank you for sharing this video! I recently found Dovydas amazing videos. He is extremely talented and you can feel the passion he has for music. This situation reminds me of the situation I’m in and have been in for 12yrs. He’s 10 yrs older then me I was in my 20s when we met. This video gives me hope that someday I can escape as well! I hope Dovydas has an amazing rest of his life and finds a true soul mate that lights up his soul! He deserves it ! More men need to share these types of stories!

[@timsmith8506]

I had no idea and I’m very glad you spoke out about this. I’ve been in the same situation for 13 years now and I’m slowly figuring it all out. It sucks to go between feeling so isolated and lonely that you are an actual grown man sitting in your car crying in the parking lot of CVS at 3am to feeling like she’s NOT abusing you and that you are crazy. Just a warning to all the guys in the beginning stages of this. DO NOT give up your friends and family. You will need to lean on them later, but she will do everything in her power to get them out of your life. She needs you to have no body to turn to. She needs you to feel weak. One thing I’ve been doing for about a year now is every single day I have a note in my phone which is gratitude for myself, other people and the world. I write one thing about myself I’m grateful for, one thing about any other person in the world and one thing about the world or nature that I’m grateful for. Doing this has made such a difference and has helped me reclaim myself and make me feel SO MUCH better and as confident as I used to be. (Actually I’m probably more confident now)

[@bestboy897]

kudos for him forr speaking out and abuse can happen to anyone

[@Lily_Samson]

I’ve been following Dovydas for a few years, and he had that look… I know it well because I had that same look hen I was his age… I also relapsed as he did… I am grateful for God’s love and the love of true friends that never judged me for staying in it so long… However, my Dad was my true earthly hero and confidant… Your transformation is beautiful, and I truly commend you for not name shaming your abuser. I hope you find your JANE Smith… BTW, I love that song, and my heart says you wrote that for her, and that is OK! That is the heart of a true manly, gentleman… So glad you reunited with your family… family is everything, and yours loves you beyond words… God bless you and thank you for sharing this very personal, painful part of your life. Keep gifting the world and those who love you with all the beauty that is you! Peace and love friend… 🔥Lily🔥

[@christinedalesio9703]

I wish more men would share their stories. My brother was in a very abusive relationship.

[@alphatruckhouse8223]

🙏🙏🙏🙏❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏 , I can identify completely , glad Dovy made it to the other side. Thanks for sharing , it takes huge courage to be vulnerable . To Thy Own self be True ~peace~

[@catamia123]

Thank you Dovydas and Mike for showing people how abuse can happen with the man being the receiver of the abuse from a SO significant other. I avoided say victim bc you showed you got Out, got Help, and Moved on to a better life, dude. Subjugation…. Denied! How you managed your music and brand under the tyranny at home is amazing. This interview Explains so much of what, The One Fan, was witnessing in the vids over time. The struggle is Real and I personally know a 35 yo man going through something so similar and I will be sharing this interview with him so he can understand - what abusive, controlling and unhealthy relationships look like! Glad you have your joy, happiness and love back in your life now.

[@eldaremington341]

Court records are on line.

[@truthrebel1958]

I had been wondering what happened. Happy for you Dovydas getting away from that toxic situation. Waiting on that platinum album.

[@eddyballester8990]

Thanks again Gents- Dovy, glad you’ve good, sincere friends you can go to and trust. Thanks for sharing your phenomenal talents with us. Looking forward to attending one of your shows soon. Thanks again to the both of you for your candor. Bid you continued success

[@chrisr.2886]

So proud of you for getting away from the abuse. No one should look down on you, and if they do, they are probably just like what you left, so please STAY who you are, you learned a lot for the future to never have that in your life again. We all learn one way or another what we don't need in life. Love your personality and your music. Been listening to it for the past 2 months, and you've got a huge crowd in Cali. You should be proud of yourself. That's the most important part. Life can only go up from here!

[@marjavainio6761]

Dovidad my heart broke . Listen this conversation with your friend that was shocking. I watch your videos almost daily and special my days off for work. Thank you for your music 🎶🎶❤️❤️❤️🎶🎶 and I am 100 💯 sure one day you will found somebody you can have a new fresh life and Love 💕. Greetings and love from Finland. used to live in Florida meny years.

[@Tarippee]

Thank you so much for explaining what happened and I'm sorry for what you have gone through. I found you on youtube several months ago and I was wondering what actually happened between you and your x. I'm glad that you decided to handle it in this way and explain what actually went on during your nine year relationship because yes, it appeared to be perfect and wonderful. It's amazing how we on the outside looking in have no idea of the reality of your life. You deserve to be happy and to go forward with your new life and love. Best wishes to your new FREE life! 💜So happy to hear that you are the happiest you've been in a long time....you deserve to be happy!