My Girlfriend Has Been SECRETLY Been Trying To Get Me Fired From ALL My Jobs r/Relationships

[@samoanjoseph1457]

Story 2: If I was the kid, and found out I was named after my mom's ex, and that's why my dad either left my mom or treated her like crap, hell, I would change the name myself.

[@JustJamie4ever]

" treated her like crap" More like she treated him like crap in this case.

[@allysonchen4286]

@@JustJamie4ever no they mean the ex BF treated her like crap. He cheated on her

[@trinitylane2202]

It's bad enough the mother named her son after her ex but it's even worse that her ex was a cheater. Why would you want to name your son after a cheater? That woman has some issues.

[@philwill0123]

@@trinitylane2202 a need to psychologically please their abuser. People have been told to believe love is "exciting" and "a rollercoaster of emotions", and never boring. She experienced the low cheater removing affection and the excitement high of him bestowing it back on her, after she pleased him. The name is a people pleasing exercise towards boyfriend. It is disgusting. One of the friends or family should have come forward before the birth.

[@lynnw7155]

I think there is more to this story. Is she still seeing the ex? Why was a name everyone's hill to die on?

[@shaetoons3602]

Story 1: I'm glad Op found out what his ex was doing but it's so frustrating that he didn't press charges. You basically gave her a slap on the wrist. Which now she'll do this to someone else. 🤦‍♀️

[@tacobelle6680]

Ikr! Its almost enabling if she's never held accountable. She needs to fry (metaphorically) for this!

[@fancyme.alter1311]

@@tacobelle6680 it does make it hard for the next guy for sure. However sometimes it takes everything you got just to save yourself. Who knows maybe now that he gets himself healed he will be able to help in the future.

[@schwagecko5589]

I totally understand why he didn't though. When you've been fighting something like that for years and you realise that you can take them to court you're already too drained to even contemplate going through that. He would have got a payout in the settlement so that's at least some punishment to her

[@ginathecookie]

@@schwagecko5589 I understand also when I left my toxic ex I was so drained and just wanted nothing to do with her I wouldn't have been able to go through with it if I was him also. even now I'd do anything I can to stay away from her. lie about my life, run, not let my life touch hers ever again. its just not worth it to even be in the same room let alone town/country as some people. (er, for context we were LDR. so it worked out for the break up!)

[@Alteusgirl]

yes i agree but also no one should force themselves when it's too much for them mentally to go through a trial. it might not be the best for the ex and maybe a future victim but it was the best for OP and i feel like sometimes, especially when your own mental health is involved it's ok to be selfish. But goooood i wish she would have gotten what she deserved for this!

[@simac8396]

First story, i feel so sorry for op...I'm also furious that his abusive ex girlfriend got away with zero consequences.

[@Jeremy-The-Bullfrog]

Wasn't zero consequences. They settled out of court, meaning she did pay him something. We just don't know how much, and he likely would have gotten more had they not settled.

[@louisejohnson6057]

This goes far beyond what I would have thought of if someone asked me to write a story of a good man with an abusive girlfriend. This was well thought out and meticulously planned psychology warfare. The woman was doing everything in her power to cause OP to have a complete emotional breakdown, and she damn well almost succeeded. I too would have enjoyed seeing her charged, go to trial, get convicted, and then go to prison, but not at the expense of OP's sanity. Plus, going to trial would be just one more opportunity for that C U Next Tuesday to get her kicks from manipulating OP's life and overwhelm him emotionally. Not being able to control him or his experiences anymore, and knowing that she failed to destroy his self-esteem or his mental health, must have infuriated her. Personally, I'm curious about what excuses she gave for why the fu(k she chose to do such horrific things to her then boyfriend. It would be a bullsh¡te excuse, because what she did is/was inexcusable, but I'm still interested in how she would try to spin it. I hope she doesn't get her fangs into anybody else ever again!

[@starbird3939]

Story 2 The fact the wife’s reaction to Op wanting to change the name was a “Fuck you”, THAT is very telling. And if this dude really cheated on ex wife, that seems especially cruel to name the child after him. And a special fuck you to her parents and friends for not telling op. Oh boo hoo, you guys were so uncomfortable… and yet not enough to tell the father of the child?!

[@daryatislenko4651]

Also I just can't imagine why you would want to call your child with your current partner after your ex? How her parents even allowed it? I wouldn't want to call my grandchild like that. And keeping that from the farther? Yeah, screw them all.

[@lowganc1739]

@@daryatislenko4651 This exactly. they could have stopped it by threatening to tell the husband, yet they said nothing and allowed this time bomb to fester.

[@pippo17173]

That is the part that confuse the fuck out of me. He cheated on her back in the day and she still loves him? What was a silver tounge chad that op's wife wanted to keep or something? There is some level of trauma that is cause by this and the wife didn't got a single therapy session to prevent that. Seriously we need to start pushing that to avoid the cheating pitfalls of despair at his point.

[@jackspring7709]

Exactly. They're all massive AHs.

[@KE-hr4sb]

S2: Yikes. Her putting her hand on his leg and trying to change the subject makes me wonder how many times she's used sex to get her way. And admitting she still loves the guy but trying to brush it off as "I can separate it, you never completely stop loving your exes." If you're healthy, you do. OP is a placeholder.

[@allysonchen4286]

I don't love any love for my exes. I loathe them, esspecially after the way I was treated by them.

[@KE-hr4sb]

@@allysonchen4286 It's funny, I always said I wouldn't hate any of my exes because 1) hate is ugly and messes you up inside and 2) me hating them wasn't hurting them in any way so it was a waste. And then my ex tried to absolutely screw me over in the divorce, custody case, child support, and take my son away. And for the first time in my life, I felt the meaning behind "Hell hath no fury." As the saying goes, I wouldn't cross the street to piss on that man if he were on fire. I may or may not piss on him if he's *not* on fire, though.

[@allysonchen4286]

@@KE-hr4sb Well I guess I chose my words well lol. My exes have never came back to beg because I straight told them that if they didn't want to be with me then break up with me. 2 of them cheated instead of just ending the relationship. I also told them if I find out they cheated that I would disappear and they would have no way to contact me. I kept to my word. I just don't have time to play games. Time is precious and I don't like mine wasted. And that's for everyone out there. Don't think that the truth won't ever come to light. I do the one and done lol

[@jackchop1576]

@@allysonchen4286 I knew I wouldn't have to look too far to find one of the "all my exes are narcissists and sociopaths" comments.

[@jameslove8507]

You know I’m actually decent friends with a ex of mine but I can see why some of y’all have severe trust issues and hate, y’all date some of the worst people ever. (Yes I know there are though who put on a mask for a while until they think they got you on a hook)

[@Metal_Mouth]

Story 2: Dude, it's so fucked up when parents name their kids after old flames behind their current partner's back. And in a lot of cases with stories like these they do it to project onto their child and create a perfect version of their lover, super gross and icky. The fact she hesitated when asked by an old friend shows she knew it was wrong and yet she still did it and she showed no remorse and no empathy towards op is screaming self-centered.

[@itsjustmaddisen]

It’s so weird and creepy I just can’t ever understand it.

[@allysonchen4286]

The fact tht she named their son after someone who cheated on her. You have more respect of a guy who didn't respect you. Seems she has unresolved issues and possibly didn't get closure. Wow the nerve of her saying she would never let him name their daughter after an ex but she's being a hypocrite. She needs a good pimp slap sorry

[@sylvestercat1898]

Precisely, and this is a big what if, but, what if OP and his ex-wife was out walking with their son and they run into her ex? I doubt that she’ll have the same opinion if they were to run into him.

[@LunaMane]

That's exactly what I was thinking. Not to mention that when the kid learns the truth of their namesake they typically distance themselves from the parent because they don't want to be the borderline incestuous replacement of the one that got away. Then the parent goes off the deep end when the child cuts them off. It just becomes a huge mess. Never name your kid after old flames unless it's been discussed and you can handle it rationally.

[@eloniom5768]

When people? You mean women right? Because is very rare a man will do this.

[@pandablair4226]

The audacity of that wife in the last story. Glad they are divorced.

[@MrNemitri]

Narcissists are like that

[@marshawargo7238]

YES! It is possible to Love a name for the name & have no feelings for the any person attached to it. It's also possible to hate a name for no other reason than you know someone with that name & you Really don't like them. The Real Problem Here is the fact that she won't talk like an adult about it or anything else! & that she lied, so what else would she lie about? She said She can disassociate the name from the person but she's not sure about OP. Does that mean she could have a one night stand & say it's OK because of not having any feelings involved BUT OP Can't because she's not sure He could Eff someone & not involve his heart? She's a control freak!!!

[@zachf748]

*_Story #2_* *_"Didn’t tell you about the name because it’s not a big deal"._* Flat out lie. If she _actually_ didn’t think it was a big deal, she wouldn’t have purposely lied about it. She lied because it is a big deal, and she knows it’s a huge betrayal and her husband never would have agreed. She is absolutely despicable. How can you ever trust her again?…

[@jackspring7709]

Exactly. She knew it would be a big deal. Well, now that he's dumped her nasty, lying ass maybe the love of her life that she named her own son after will take her back. Maybe.

[@LadyTeaBlossom]

Story 2: I don't doubt that if the roles were reversed, the ex-wife would have ABSOLUTELY lost her shit. I hope that little boy is okay. If I found out that was the origin of my name I would be so disgusted. I don't think I could look at my mom the same.

[@jackspring7709]

Very true.

[@glitchyglitchy3925]

That was horrifying. I'm glad he managed to get out of that relationship while he still had some of his sanity intact.

[@DarkAngel65989]

I wasn't too surprise in how the second story end, since it clear the ex-wife refuse to acknowledge OP feeling with the name, and I doubt the wife saying she doesn't have feeling for her ex, her family and friend lying and covering for us are just as bed

[@dylanpalmer5151]

Ex-wife: "I can keep feelings out of it, but I don't know if you could," Also ex-wife: "Yeah I still love him, what about it?"

[@eliopearlman1309]

The thing is that her ex probably doesn't even remember her damn name and she's out there ruining her life over him.

[@dionysus_adores]

It's really creepy to name your kid after the ex. She sounds like she wanted to hang on to those feelings without op knowing. Creepy af

[@themayhemofmadness7038]

@@dylanpalmer5151 That’s what I came here to say. Considering that she said she wouldn’t ever let him name a daughter after an ex because she isn’t sure he’d be able to separate it, just goes to show that she was unable to herself and she was projecting. I hope he found someone better than her. And how much do you want to bet that she never showed up to the counseling session?

[@JJerseyGirl]

@@eliopearlman1309 Why would she name her child after a exboyfriend who cheated on her🤪

[@sophiej9429]

Story 2: I'm not surprised it ended in divorce. She refused to behave like an adult and accept her part in such a betrayal. Not only a betrayal by her, but by her entire family and friend circle too. OP deserves better.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

This uncovered many cowpies. She kept secret the origin of the name, she took no responsibility, she didn't respect OP when he made an ultimatum. I'm not much for divorce, but there are probably other ugly things just beneath the surface that she doesn't want to come out. So she goes in for just shutting down discussion.

[@tabithadearth7507]

OP in the first story needs to get a Private Investigator with a IT Forensic Investigator on their payroll.

[@tamsel814]

Yeah, after about 4 jobs op should have tried to find out the identity of this person. Someone was clearly trying to ruin ops life. I personally would have assumed I had a wierd stalker and not my partner. But still this is an issue that need to be fixed.

[@poohbear4515]

I’m a petty B. I want bloodshed(not really bloody lol). It’s good he decided the “goody two-shoes” route, but the heartless B needed to be taught a lesson. So good ending, but also a bad ending since she gets to walk a free B.

[@destinedtogame]

OP was struggling with money. PIs aren't cheap

[@bunnyslippers191]

@@destinedtogame Yep. Even a relatively easy background check done by a PI agency is going to run $100 and up from there, depending on what the PI charges per hour, what they find, and how far they follow leads. If they find something sort of shady and follow it far enough to find some really shady stuff it can get really expensive. A lot of them charge a retainer of $1500 to $2000. Some of them use that to cover the cost of the investigation and if their hourly rate means they use up part of that they return the rest, but some of them regard the retainer as in addition to what they charge hourly. Since the average hourly rate is about $85 an hour the bill can get really expensive quickly. They don't charge as much per hour as attorneys do, but they're not settling for the federal minimum wage, that's for sure. (this is what I found in a quick Google) OP was working part time and not making much, so there's no way they could afford a PI.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Story 1: What type of person says they love someone yet sabotages them at every opportunity

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

A sadist?

[@owl7072]

Mother Gothel: s/o edition for when you thought this type of shit ended with parents manipulating kids

[@anthonygilmour6236]

What's even worse is that girlfriend in story one isn't even the most psychotic partner in this video.

[@TriXJester]

Sociopaths

[@MiraTheWarlock]

A sadist who gets off on being the sweet comforting hero Or a possessive maniac who is paranoid because at a job there are other people Take your pick

[@brigidtheirish]

1: "Why would she do that, though?" OP answers his own question three sentences later. "She's the only thing keeping me sane." This is *abuse.* A seriously stealthy form of it, too. She orchestrates disasters so he can come to her for comfort and develop a reliance on her. I recall at least one episode of Forensic Files where an arson investigator was also an *arsonist* so he could impress people with his investigative skills. Updates: It probably says a lot about me that I'm not even *close* to surprised by the ex's behavior. A childhood of paranoia fed by crime and spy dramas straight from the Cold War has its perks. Probably would've had a go-bag stashed under my bed through most of the '90s if Mom wasn't *very* clear on what she thought of food in our bedrooms. 2: Also not surprised that at least some commenters assumed OP is or would turn abusive over the name. Jeez. A guy just can't win. Also, *always* push for details on someone's past before marrying. *ALWAYS.* That past can and *will* come back to bite you. Of course, the wife's behavior is to be expected. *Her* feelings matter more than *his,* obviously, because she's a woman and *he's* just a *man.*

[@themayhemofmadness7038]

The problem with the people thinking OP would turn abusive, is that they most likely are the same people who discount male abuse victims. It is actually more common than they realize. And the men that are more apt to fall victim to it are going to be men less likely to stand up for themselves, let alone fight back, just the same as women who fall victim to abuse. Abusers are master manipulators who usually tear their victims down mentally and emotionally first, while isolating them, and then sometimes, but not always, turn physically violent. Did you notice that OP didn’t really mention his OWN friends or family as a support system. He was surrounded by her, her family and her friends. And even though her friends and family also knew it was wrong, not ONE of them went against her and told or warned him. Meaning he was essentially stuck in the enemy’s camp where she controlled all.

[@brigidtheirish]

@@themayhemofmadness7038 *Exactly.* Men who try to say they've been abused get laughed at *if they're lucky.* Even a lot of organizations *dedicated* to helping victims of abuse turn them away. At worse, *they* get accused and prosecuted as abusers because *obviously* men can't be *victims.*

[@themayhemofmadness7038]

@@brigidtheirish yup. I have a male friend (I’m cis female for full disclosure), who was in an abusive relationship with a woman. It was well hidden for a long time because she had him so convinced it was his fault. Even when they broke up, she was still manipulating him to stick around in the same house under the guise that she couldn’t afford it on her own (he couldn’t, but she could, she just didn’t want it to fall completely on her and refused to buy him out of his half). She just wanted to keep him around as an emotional and sometimes physical punching bag. It took me and a few others an entire weekend to move him out. He had to leave so much behind, but the worst part was leaving his dogs. He couldn’t find a new place that would accept them on short notice. And she ‘promised to care for them’. She didn’t. She sold at least one of them, possibly both, shortly afterwards. Years later and he still has PTSD from that narcissistic borderline (actual official diagnoses, that she refused to accept), b*tch.

[@brigidtheirish]

@@themayhemofmadness7038 Damn. Glad you were able to get your friend out, and sad about the dogs. I've had trouble finding places that'd allow pets, too. A few irresponsible tenants ruin it for the rest of us. Hope he's getting the support he needs for PTSD. Dad's got it (for different reasons) and it is *not* fun.

[@maiingan07]

@@themayhemofmadness7038 - I don’t want this to sound rude, I’m simply asking out of ignorance. What is a cis female? If it’s too personal, please feel free to ignore, I’m not out to hurt any one’s feeling behind my keyboard. You know what I found interesting between you and the Irish lady you’ve been commenting with? It’s us ladies who are aware and speak out for men who are or have been abused. Thankfully, our societies are slowly waking up, we just have to get them to move a bit faster and not to pussyfoot around the abuse. To do this successfully, all of us need to speak about it publicly and to share information freely with each other. I know I’m pretty ignorant about a lot of it, and would definitely have to do some deep research, but after I can start having conversations with my female and male friends. Heck, I can kinda start now. Anyways, I just wanted to pipe in and thank you ladies for speaking freely, especially with you sharing a personal experience with of it. I hope your friend will find an amazing partner when the time is right and he’s had a lot of healing. I hope they fall deeply in love and become the greatest partners they could ever imagine together. And for their love to hold strong for the rest of their lives. And the petty in me also wishes the bwitch learns of their happiness and has no avenue in order to hurt or touch either of them. Essentially losing all of her power against him. Now that would be the icing on their wedding cake. I wish you nothing but good things. Be well

[@sedalionthunder6295]

Second story: blanket divorce. He was being gaslit so badly there. Glad he held his ground.

[@myself0510]

He did get a divorce within a year. It's on his profile, he said it in an AskReddit post.

[@zachf748]

These people who lie and name their kid after an ex are so despicable. And this is even worse, she name him after an ex who cheated on her.

[@TheIronwil]

Last Story: Go scorched earth on the wife. If he’d have done the same it’d “be different”? Uh… no. The fact that everyone kept the secret would have me even more enraged.

[@diarradunlap9337]

Scorched Earth, hell! I'd be going full Revelation/Tribulation plagues and curses on her AND her family.

[@Morloch]

Sad part is that she probably took him for everything in the divorce and now she is calling him narcissistic and controlling when she talks about him.

[@Mewse1203]

Last story: she sounds really manipulative. There's something else whether it's something like narcissism or psychopathy I'm not sure, but she seems to have an inability to see this from OO's perspective nor care about how he'd feel.

[@ohreally1997]

Psychopathy seems like more than a stretch, given how little info there is, but there IS definitely something there. The level of entitlement and invalidating responses indicate trait narcissism, no doubt. Also, the whole bit with her parents? It's extremely problematic for the parents to just show up for and try to manage the situation with OP. Obviously problematic that they felt the need to keep the convo secret, but also that they're asking him not to tell his wife about a convo where they felt it was appropriate to voice their opinion on a possible name change. Those parents are just violating boundaries right and left; it's not hard to see where the wife gets it.

[@pippo17173]

@@ohreally1997 I'm more wondering if it involves the ex who cheated on her since at this point, cheating can cause a massive ptsd attack and destory your mental health to a T.

[@kanelovec4315]

Girlfriend is either a control freak wanting op under her thumb, is a attention hog who didn't like op having a job because it took his time from her, jealousy of wanting his job, or had a comfort kink where she wanted to be op's hero and comfort when he was down.

[@carolroberts4614]

She did seem to want to be his saviour, like the boyfriend that used the op's candle deliberately in a power cut. It was a special one made by her deceased sister, and the boyfriend did it because he liked things the way they were when she was sad and dependant on him. I didn't word that very well, but it is 2 am here!

[@APlatapus]

2nd story I would've publically shamed the wife and her family for hiding it. Absolutely disgusting behaviour. I could never allow my child to pull such a horrid stunt. Idk if it's possible to get the courts to mandate a name change given the situation but that would be priority number 1 if possible.

[@zachf748]

*_Story #2_* She is absolutely despicable. The name betrayal is already despicable, but her whole attitude after the fact, and how she completely blew him off is even worse. She’s truly a terrible human being.

[@hilaryc3203]

I suspect that by naming her child after her ex it, in her twisted mind, keeps him with her.

[@jackspring7709]

@@hilaryc3203 Yep - that's what I was thinking. What an absolute horror.

[@rylashadow18]

I hope luck in getting full custody to that last OP. Wife clearly wanted to keep some form of relationship with that ex of hers. I'd go a step further and let him know to be extra careful about things seeing as who knows what she's doing.

[@tinygabriel9760]

These stories sometimes just wow.... " My partner is doing stuff to me that a supposedly loving, supportive partner would never do please help".... Uhhh leave the piece of crap jeez But seriously that's some abusive stuff glad op had the sense to leave... Anyone who's had a tough time getting or keeping a job knows how much that sucks and messes with your self esteem.

[@princess2none]

Sometimes gaslighting comes into play. There are times you may know and feel that you are not being treated right but the way they spin it you're in the wrong or deserving of their treatment but they're the only ones who will ever love you so you should accept it

[@kirksnowden8023]

Dude being stalked/character assassinated. He’s got many issues besides her. Like crying too much, lack of awareness and lack of ambition.

[@juanhaines7295]

Story 2 I've heard this one before. Good on op for leaving. Plus tell the kid when he's older she's he got his name from.

[@kratkartan1486]

Story 2: I have a feeling the "old fling" isn't that at all. It feels like an ongoing fling with how she was acting. Glad OP divorced her, and I hope he got full custody of his son.

[@akl2k7]

Or it's a fling she wants to come back. She'd probably just up and divorce OP if the ex so much as moved back into the area

[@justinchristoph3725]

Story 1: She's probably found another victim by now. The OP should have pressed charges, if not for him, then for the next poor sap she set up to victimize. Seriously, people like her don't stop unless they are slammed down hard. Very hard.

[@sfsin3380]

He can't there's not enough evidence for the criminal charges (sadly how many stalkers get away with it). He settled out of court for in the civil case. Getting into the court room doesn't matter if he lost and if he was as afraid of the case as he says that a real risk (A lot of this would be hinged on his testimony and if he's nervous he might come across as untrustworthy, An unfortunate risk in abuse cases as the defenses usual strategy is to undermine the victim and she's shown she's a master at making people believe OP is the bad guy) Settling means the case is on her record now saying it was settled not dropped or lost. That the best thing he could do for future victims with what he had.

[@akl2k7]

Vampires and succubae like her always need someone to feed on. She's got a new boy toy by now.

[@Mia-dt3gl]

I think the name in Story 2 was OP’s ex’s “power play” against her ex-boyfriend. In her mind this was her way of winning against him because she loved him and he discarded her. Her son with _his_ name was her trophy from this “victory” in her mind. And the reason she got so angry about changing the name was because she would no longer be “victorious” against her ex. It makes me suspect that she didn’t even love OP but married him as part of this game she’s playing with her ex. I’m glad OP got out of that but it’s too bad he’s tied to this lady for the next 18 years. And it’s a shame a child is involved in her game.

[@ianmoritzplatapino3684]

she settled she doesn't love him. she just tolerates him because he is the classic provider and can give her stability. the moment the ex returns she would likely cheat. that's why if you find put your partner settled for you. break up and move on. she is the classic alpha widow

[@kateajurors8640]

I think so at all especially if she wasn't willing to change the baby's name to save a marriage the marriage. Not even fully just change it to the middle name she lost her s*** but if it wasn't that big of a deal nah man she's still in love with her ex if that baby isn't the x I would almost demand a paternity test at that point

[@darrylblanch8463]

story 1. Atleast OP managed to get away. His father is a BOSS.

[@ErisstheGoddessofmanhwas]

First story: She need a punishment. I wished she was in jail.

[@jppurves7837]

Story 1: I wish we had gotten more closure from the update. There was no information about why the girlfriend was sabotaging OP's life and evidently she didn't face any repercussions for her actions.

[@Grace_x68]

She had total control over him. Like meghan over Harry. She is a really bad, dangerous narcissist

[@lillytheskeleton]

she's an abuser. that's it, that's the reason. she wanted him to depend on her. and i think the reason he didn't press charges was because he was just so tired and wanted to be done with the whole situation

[@WhitneyDahlin]

Even abusers have reasons (stupid and f**ked up reasons) as to why they abuse. I really wanted to hear what justification she used in her own mind. WHY?!!! ‼️‼️❓❓ WHY DIDN'T HE DEMAND ANSWERS! Was it some twisted sense of revenge for some minor slight or imagine slight? Was it because she was so deeply insecure she was afraid he was going to cheat on her so she wanted him without a job? Is it because she thought those jobs were "below" him? Because she's a sadist? It's also completely possible he did something terrible to her and that's why he never gave her reasons. I don't think that's the case but it's just so weird he never wanted to know which makes me believe he does already know why.

[@akl2k7]

@@WhitneyDahlin Then again, this is the kind of situation where it doesn't really matter why, just that she did it. It's like with cheating. Almost no reason a cheater can give is a good reason, even ones that make the cheater a bit more sympathetic (such as the non-cheating spouse being abusive. That would just put the affair partner into the abuser's line of fire).

[@emnorfolk5559]

Girlfriend "needs op to need her" and by continuously getting them fired, she's making sure that's what's going to happen! Op needs to LEAVE and REPORT her to the police!

[@Zerohero_007]

Glad the OP on the second story moved on, his ex and her family were crazy in the head. How could they all keep him in the dark for 5 years?! And the hypocrisy of the ex… good riddance, get away from all that crazy.

[@nicknitro86]

That woman absolutely doesn't love nor respect her husband. That's 100% divorce worthy.

[@GBunnyG]

Story 1: I know, logically, that people like this exist. But man, do I hate Reddit for telling me about them. Whaaaaaaaaaaat the hell.

[@chrisj1475]

Story 2: It's an unbearable shame that women who are evil like that do not get punished. Nothing. And I'm not advocating for any criminal charges.

[@alejandramesones8417]

S2: It was obvious that there was no other ending since the ex wanted to compare how it would be different if it was an OP ex's name. That's when you know she's talking about herself rather than OP

[@mesiagamer5217]

Honestly story two just seems insane to me. The fact that the wife didn't want to talk about this at all just... I don't even know what to say.

[@Misspellednumbers]

Story 1: I'm kinda sad OP didn't take her to court. It's definitely not on OP to do anything but leave, but there's a high chance she's doing this to someone else now. Whatever sick and twisted pleasure she got from it is now happening to someone else (perchance she hadn't realize that OP caught on). I'm glad OP is out of that relationship, but I hope that if she has continued, that her next ex figures it out and gets her the worst punishment possible.

[@tamsel814]

Yeah, plus his professional education is now kinda ruined. Getting fired from many jobs after 2.5 weeks to 5 months is a red flag on a resume.

[@AceAviations2]

@@tamsel814 Then again I'm sure that he still has the evidence, all it would take is showing some of the evidence of how he was slandered. Also the settlement out of court is on-record, all he'd have to do is point to that to clear up that.

[@ianmoritzplatapino3684]

Story 2 thank God this man divorced that psycho. she clearly was in love with the ex and clearly settled. the moment you find out your partner settled its better to part ways, you know you are given the bare minimum. sadly a kid is involved in this sham of a marriage. and the ex family are as bad as her by not telling him about his kids name

[@WabbitHunter68]

I can absolutely understand the first person not wanting to sue his ex, but unfortunately if there's no repercussion for her actions she'll just keep doing it. The second one. She really didn't give a shit about her husband. Horrible narcissistic behaviour.

[@ThatsViews]

One concerning point that struck me was that her parents were scared of their daughter finding out that they had even spoken to him? I fear there's a lot more here than meets the eye.

[@ineedhoez]

Na.... they wanted to build rapport with hubby. Good cop/bad cop. They are doing the bidding of the wife. They took the soft approach. Creating a secret is a very effective way to manufacture a bond.

[@BridgetKF]

Story 2? That self-centered B-word would rather hurt her husband, and utterly destroy their family, than admit she ever did anything wrong. The fact is, it's obvious she's still deeply in love with, and likely utterly obsessing over, her ex. She desperately wants to be with HIM and not her husband. So she is now trying to use this as the wedge to try to force the issue. And, in the divorce, she'll likely try to paint her now ex-husband as "abusive, controlling, cruel, " etc. To try to get sole custody, and use their son against him as a weapon, rather than love the child as a mom should.

[@Jenizus]

You pronounced Janice like my name is pronounced. Holy hell, I'm shook! No one gets my pronunciation EVER so to hear it on the name that they usually say instead is craaaazy haha

[@floraposteschild4184]

Ha! Me, too. I'm like "hello, not all Jan-NEECEes!"

[@Jeremy-The-Bullfrog]

Story 1: Just wanted to point out OP did press charges. They settled out of court.

[@Shamazya]

One big difference between this and 'Always press charges' is that when the latter comes up it's almost always the case that the option to do so has been presented already. It's not really a process or a gamble on whether it'll happen or not unlike this scenario where you have to be brutally scrutinized by the court system that you might not even win.

[@tophesshtzgiggles609]

story1: i didn't mind op's private settlement, I'm just frustrated to not know what she claims it was about.

[@JJerseyGirl]

2nd story- Your wife names y'all son after a exboyfriend from high school who cheated on her. Makes no sense.

[@CooperGal24]

First Story: OP's better off not only breaking up and file a restraining order against his Evil Ex, but also take her to court forgetting him fired with malicious intent! This "Piece of Work" Ex was probably doing that to control OP. It's not just men that controls others, it's women, employees, bosses and even friends and family members! OP seeing his Dad and telling him what happened was a great idea, he REALLY needed the support and comfort after getting away from this psychotic nightmare girlfriend! I do hope that the Evil Ex got what she deserved in the form of lawsuits, police charges and even time in jail!

[@Graves933]

I refuse to believe the wife was over her ex, there has to be something the OP is missing. Why would everyone be quite unless They have a reason to be?

[@coreymartin6486]

Never in à million years would I even humor naming my kid after an ex, regardless of caring about them as a person. I'm honestly sickened by her attitude and behavior.

[@seankeller1560]

Story one sounds like the GF is either very insecure and thinks op well leave her if he ever gets his life together. Also she could have a mental issue where she gets off on being in a position where op needs her for support. Tho this isn't uncommon mother's make their kids sick for attention and there is a story of a women sabotaging her partners future by using his email denying a scholarship to a school he wanted to go to

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

OP needs to get the heck out of this relationship. How on earth would someone who claims to love someone else want to get them fired from all of their jobs?! ಠ⁠︵⁠ಠ This would definitely be a dealbreaker for me! I would've evaporated on the spot. After Updates: I'm so glad OP dumped his nasty girlfriend. Good riddance to her. And kudos to OP's father for being an absolute legend to his son! I hope he can get his life back on track and find happiness! ❤️

[@wildridegaming874]

Story 1.. she is not the one keeping you sane, she is the one making you insane.

[@muhname6052]

Story2: I remember this story. I'd be absolutely disgusted with her that's a big betrayal. Then the whole family knew? Nope. Throw them all out. Fight for full custody and move states.

[@dancingbymoonlt]

I hope OP can be brave enough to stalk her on social media and let every man she ever tries to date know what kind of psycho they are dating so they can run too.

[@F8...]

dude that girl took emotional manipulation to historic levels...definatly shoulda pressed charges

[@L3adb3lly]

Story 1 - I don't think I could move on without knowing why she did that. She must have been jealous, or maybe she was getting off on being his support

[@rebajoe]

Halfway through story 1, I was thinking about that scene from 'The Sixth Sense' where it's revealed that(spoiler) sick ghost girl was poisoned by her mom(stepmom?) to keep her sick/get sympathy from other people, and even during the funeral there's whispers about the little sister has been getting sick too so she would've been next if the (step)mom hadn't been exposed.

[@ronhall5395]

Story 1, She is some sort of sadistic psychotic. Story 2, Sad that it ended in divorce. She has some real sick fantasy about her ex and her son? She was willing to divorce rather than see a therapist. So she says she wanted to be with him, but still loves her ex. I don't comprehend her attachment.

[@lowganc1739]

It's simple, she never felt anything for OP. It's glaringly obvious from her reactions that she doesn't give a quantum of a damn about Op's feelings, instead immediately becoming enraged when the topic of a name change came up. It's obvious the only thing she sought from him was his role as a provider.

[@jenniferslack-smith5129]

It is a shame that OP was unable to at least leave a warning for the next guy this vampire will attach herself to.

[@abigailpulliam6996]

This is why I'm glad my parents decided to ask my brother what to name me. He had a friend named Abigail, so here we are.

[@SorenPenrose]

Story 2 that woman never had any respect for OP. Sue insults his emotional intelligence, refuses to acknowledge her own wrongdoing, and refuses to even start working towards a resolution. OP was nothing but a tool for her to use.

[@owlintrenchcoat]

I'm with the guy on story 2 98%. I think changing the kid's name is a little much. I think that's something that needs to be discussed in therapy because it ultimately comes down to what's best for the kid in that regard.

[@coreymartin6486]

A little much? It's always à reminder of her exbf....whom she admits that she loves. It would be the most beta move in the world, the simpest of all simp moves, to just be ok calling your kid the name of an ex that she clearly still has feelings for. I seriously doubt you would be ok keeping the name of your kid "veronica" as an ex of your husband's...whom he loves.

[@owlintrenchcoat]

@@coreymartin6486 I wouldn't, but it's the kid's name at this point and they know it by now. I assume you're attached to your name and wouldn't want someone just switching it up on you. The more important thing here than the feelings of either parent is the kid's stability, especially considering that his parents' marriage is already crumbling around him. Parents gotta put their kids first, even when it absolutely sucks.

[@coreymartin6486]

@@owlintrenchcoat kid is 5 years old, not 16. I doubt any kid at that âgé would be against changing his name if you gave him options to choose.

[@owlintrenchcoat]

@@coreymartin6486 I still don't think it's a good idea. Especially since everything else in his life is about to go to shit, why take the only make he knows from him too?

[@coreymartin6486]

@@owlintrenchcoat I doubt his name is the only thing he knows. Plus, there's no garuntee that he won't find out information about the origin of his name later, and it may not even require the father spilling the beans. If this name is as unique as OP suggests it is.....do you not think à 16 year old kid won't put two and two together when he sees his mom communicating with her exboyfriend? That could very well destroy his relationship with his mother completely. The way this chick talks and rationalizes....I doubt she's not been in contact with her exbf or hasn't wanted an opportunity to reach out. A person doesn't name à kid after a person they don't want to be around or communicate with, if possible.

[@maryforstall7211]

In my bones I knew it was her! The words were too familiar with her behavior. Do no let her control you anymore! Talk to the police when ever you move out! Sorry buddy- move on find a better girl that deserves you!!!

[@Maya-iz9fx]

Someone should expose those psychopath Thinking they will move on to their next victim and will do the same... Really... really scared me

[@luvondarox]

I *hate* it when someone flips the genders of the _exact same scenario_ and the response is "That's not the same." How is it not the same??

[@RSARYR]

I remembered the first story a long time ago. It was the most disturbed, crazy story I have ever heard. I was very worried about the OP at the time. His ex sounded like a manipulative, sadist witch that liked OP being helpless. She wanted him to suffer in order for OP to rely on her more and more. I was disappointed when he didn't press charges against the ex however if he physically and emotionally couldn't be in the same room with her then it was for the best for OP. I'm glad he's doing better and got far away from her.

[@jstar1054]

I am very happy for how the first OP handled the situation. He realized the issue, ran for his life, and stayed away. Not many people have the ability to realize the gravity of the situation they are in and hope to find a solution or to fix the other person. It may make for a rather tame update but OP won by far.

[@rapsack7058]

Story 2: She is extremly disrespectfull to OP. For me her behavior is a reason for file for divorce. She has way to much feeling for the EX. She has no respect and empathy for her husband. Thats hard to fix, especialy since she made a power play out of it. So file for divorce and look what happends.

[@gregmiller4387]

Story 1- Why was she doing this? I know she was crazy but even the insane have a reason for the insane things they do.

[@lizfritz6546]

Remember that story where the bf burned OP’s candle that her dead sister made for her (or something like that)? Yeah. OP1’s gf wants to have him financially and emotionally dependent

[@paulchaudoir190]

I hope op demands full custody in story two. I hope secretly he starts calling his son a different name. If she finds out he can say it's a nickname.

[@onlyoddity]

"How would you feel if we had a daughter, and i named her after my ex?" "That's different, I wouldn't let that happen." SO THEN WHY'D YOU DO IT FCKN HELL

[@riley6740]

She hurts him so he relies on her to fix him.

[@pianolady10]

OP 1 sounds almost like a form of Munchausen’s. She gets to feel good about herself by comforting you.

[@josephsmith5305]

Story 1: Let me get this straight, you think that it is ok for her not to be punished and be able to move on to the next person, disgusting!!!!

[@tictactoe325]

OP1. I had a similar problem with a family member doing the same thing to me. Yes! It was abuse, a jealous nasty piece of 💩. They now know nothing about my new workplace.

[@delilahbelle2125]

Story 2: Her "I know I can disconnect from the name," but not trusting that OP would be able to do the same if the roles were reversed was ridiculous. That was OP's opportunity to Uno reverse right there.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

The 1st Story is a classic story of a sociopath ruining their victim's life so the victim feels they can only rely upon the sociopath. The GF is sabotaging any independence he has and every single unjust firing wittles away at OP's self-esteem and confidence. THAT is why she is doing this. She wants him to be weak and never leave her. Many sociopaths also have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) wherein the worst fear they have is being abandoned. So either they push away all their loved ones as a way to abandon before being abandoned, or they make sure their loved ones will NEVER abandon them by making life impossible for their loved one without them. OP is being put into a codependency relationship. He feels his GF is the only thing holding him together, while SHE is the one making his life so miserable that he feels he NEEDS her or his world will fall apart. In actuality, he needs to LEAVE her, move to a new city/state/country and cut all ties so she can't just find him to fuck with his life further. He will find his life will be better. No more firings that aren't his fault, his friends won't abandon him for misunderstandings, and he won't have this overwhelming feeling of doom.

[@b00g3rs21]

Story 2 is the stuff of nightmares, no one wants to be that guy

[@thedarkestzenitheon3340]

Yes you can stop loving someone. I now hate my loser of an ex

[@sunnykitten815]

I'm cleaning the disaster of a kitchen after the ceiling caved in when a pipe burst in my kitchen. Then after cleaning my dog came and strung the trash out all over the kitchen again

[@catT5236]

Wow! There are some scarily manipulative & awful people out there - that applies to both the gf from story one & the wife in story two.

[@kate2451]

Congrats for 100k subscribers 🎉🎊🎉

[@Mewse1203]

Be kind, be safe and take care of yourself. Have a great day.

[@DrownedInExile]

S1: This girl is a straight-up sociopath. So glad OP was able to get away from her. His dad is a freaking superhero! Though it's a pity he didn't think to delete her dossier. Also unfortunate he wasn't able to face her in court. Doubtless she'll just move on to a new victim. Oh well, hope OP is able to recover from her vile machinations.

[@msladyboyd1]

Not love but obsession, HS relationship was probably one sided especially since the whole family knew it. She’s likely no-show for therapy.

[@zoe9190]

Its something similar to a saviour complex and munchausen by proxy. Her doing this gets the attention she wants from you no matter how bad the experience was for you. She helps console you, she gets extra time with you because you arent working and then helping you find new jobs. Its crazy sick, and shes probably been doing this well before she met you, thankfully, people like her are nowhere near common. Plenty of crap and crazy men and women, but herspecific type youd have to be extremely unlucky to find someone else who would do this to you

[@alenasenie6928]

Story 2: he should lawyer up just in case. Well, i wrote that just before the "we divorced" comment, that was seen from many kilometers away

[@tinak2576]

Story 2: that wife nuked her marriage. Not because she did that, but because she was so indifferent to the OP’s valid feelings about what she did with the name.

[@fufufuaru]

lmao that very last update, short and straight to the point. Happy freedom, dude.

[@ajsopel]

Story 2: Her reaction to changing the name is the key part of this. It's obviously her way of still being with this man she thinks about on the regular, probably borderline obsesses over. Any attempt to sever this connection is an attack on a long standing fantasy, if the were to observe her behavior around the son she probably pushes to for the boy to get similar hobbies and wear similar clothes. This is dangerous devouring mother behavior and she needs professional help and the boy needs to be separated from her at least temporarily.

[@DragonicGamer32]

In story 2 she says that she loves OP and does not love her Ex in the way she does her husband. Yet when OP suggests changing the kid's name to their middle name she got sooo angry. This tells me a few worrying things. LIke is she going to end up trying to live out the relationship she had with this ex with their kid? Is she hoping that by having the name that he will become JUST like her ex and they can have something between each other. The fact she is vehemently opposed to a name change tells me she has more than just a small emotional attachment to it. If they did get divorced I hope the kid is doing better now.

[@gcarr1089]

Last story - hope OP only ever calls his son by his middle name and when he is older he tells him why he never uses his first name, then mum can explains why she did what she did to the son, if he can still be bothered to speak to her.

[@VHEmpress]

Story 1; "She's the only thing that's keeping me sane." In truth, she's the reason you're going a bit crazy. None of this would have happened if not for her.

[@d74killer]

Story 2: my cousin did this. She never dated the guy she named her kid after. She crushed really hard for him though. She eventually got married (to a different guy) in her late thirties and had a son whom she named after her college crush. I don’t see them much but I’m pretty sure husband doesn’t know.

[@namedhuman5870]

Naming your kid after an ex, sounds great for the kid to find out later in life.

[@alg94]

story 1: ALWAYS take it to court. if you dont they will do it to someone else.

[@carolroberts4614]

It sounds like it would have destroyed op's mental health even more than she had already. I think he's suffered enough, although it would have been nice to see her get her comeuppance. There are ways of spreading the word on what she did.

[@Jeremy-The-Bullfrog]

OP did go the legal rlute. They said it was settled outside of court.