My Parenting Mindsets That Have Changed Since Actually Becoming A Mother

[@princesspinkie1661]

Fun fact: YOU were the research I did before having my baby. She was already in the oven but I watched you with munchkin Rook to see what I would be up for.

[@genevieveevans7307]

Love this!! Finally a mum who speaks for all of us new mothers! My mindset has completely done a 180 since becoming a mum. Social media totally glamorises motherhood 👏

[@Jessssicadanielle]

I got pregnant at 30 but suffered years of infertility & loss. If I could have chose when I had kids, my (late) 20s would be *slightly* easier. I had a pretty good time in my 20s though! Travelled a lot, lived in Australia twice, etc. I was too selfish my in 20s I think. Now in my 30s I’m WAY less selfish and had a baby when I was truly ready. I don’t think of him as an inconvenience or that I miss my “old life”. I love him so much and have loved every step of the way. The one thing I didn’t think I’d allow was screen time but having a child without the joy of a village, a few mins here or there helps me out so much! Great video! I agree with pretty much everything 😂

[@Ellesflowers]

I had my daughter at 31 and wished I had her before lol The other time I needed to quarantine for two weeks and many times I thought how nice it would have been if she had a sibling. (Sadly it’s been hard for me to conceive a second time) I think the first 4 years are hard, no matter when you had them. They require a lot. Somebody once told me having 3 children it’s easier than two hehe. Now she is about to be 4 years old and although still challenging, she gets to go to kindergarten for 4 hours and she is more independent, doesn’t need me as much as before. I think we can get to see the fruits of consistent parenting at this stage, now she finally helps me clean up without needing to “beg” like before. I hope things get easier for other parents as well.

[@bratmari]

I turned 30 right after I had my first. It is nice that I spent 6 years with my husband before we had our kids. And I got my "wild" or selfish days out of the way in my early 20's before I met him. I hear a lot of older women (lots on mom confessions on IG) who are bored and say they got married too young and they start rebelling, affairs, etc. One specifically worked at my husband's office and she admits she just settled down at 19 and 20 yrs later never got to have fun, and she ended up having an affair+divorce recently. On the other hand being an "older mom" I see all these young moms who have 4 kids by 28 and I'm a bit jealous that they got that out of the way. I'm 34 and going to have my 2nd next month.

[@stupefyedits1633]

Congrats on the second kid 😃😀. Is it a boy or girl?

[@ashb2404]

I had babies in my 20s and one at 35... Both ages have pro and cons I suppose. For me, I was so much more settled in my 30s and just so badly wanted to experience pregnancy and new motherhood in that stage of life... I knew I was starting all over and resetting the clock to having kids out of the house, but it had been so amazing...

[@vsailorsv]

Screen time and "flashy toys" was something I was so against. Yeah, that was all great until we started remodeling and I needed to be able to set him down and walk away to help with a task or cook, etc.

[@lady8ugch3f]

Same , I was against both until I became an exclusively pumping mom

[@erinshannon1114]

I have no regrets about having my baby in my 30's. No right or wrong way here but I'm SO happy I got to travel and live life how I wanted without the responsibility of kids. My one piece of advice for any of my friends and family in their 20's is to wait as long as you can before you have them. Obviously you can be happy doing it the opposite way but after you have kids, you always have that responsibility, even as they get older. You are less "care free".

[@joannak6121]

I feel the same way about being a first time mom at 33.

[@robyn3083]

I 100% agree. I am 30 and about to have my first baby and my husband will turn 32 right around my due date. We enjoyed just us for 7 years, got to travel lots, live far away, be financially stable.

[@BabySleepTeam]

I had our girls at 33 and 35 and we had lived overseas for 8 years beforehand and are very grateful to have travelled so much. In saying that, it is a totally personal choice and I definitely see the other side of the coin of having kids in your 20's!

[@MarjoleinVeenendaal]

THANK YOU for speaking up about 'the right way' to parent. I'm expecting a baby in April and every booklet from every caretaker I read is stressing how they prefer breastfeeding over formula and how it's the best for your baby and it goes on and on and on. I can't breastfeed due to a medical procedure I had as a teenager and the way everything was worded just made me feel like a horrible mom, even at only 7 weeks pregnant. I love hearing about your positive experience with breastfeeding and I love even more how you keep emphasizing that it was right for you and how everyone is different. I love your content, I love how practical and down to earth it is, and how much I'm learning from it. Thank you!

[@ashleywollaston9066]

I don’t think you need to apologize for changed opinions, be you. Moms will find it refreshing and comforting!

[@malibelcher5192]

Love this! I’m in the same boat with so many changed mindsets! It’s honestly refreshing to hear some one else saying they changed their minds too!

[@thedeidremovies]

Having grown up with younger siblings, I’d always thought I’m prepared to have kids of my own. As I get older I do believe that’s true to some extent, but I also realize that you have to balance having a child with the pressure of raising them and taking care of yourself. Crazy how we think we’ve got it all figured out when we’re younger 😜

[@theparttimehomemaker]

This is really interesting and insightful. Thanks for sharing!

[@colourfulpencil998]

Everything what you said I agree with it so much

[@amarshall5407]

I always thought I would be one that got rid of the binky early, potty trained early, did preschool early etc. But I am finding that hard with my daughter. Some of it I have just stopped caring about, like she's 2.5 and only gets her binky at nap and night and while we will do away with it soon I am in no rush to push her. Other aspects we are actively working on. We are currently having a power struggle over the toilet (which she knows how to use but refuses to) and I have just had to learn to back off, its not worth it right now. We are a girl family (2nd and last baby is a girl due this fall) and my poor husband gets comments on it all the time, like "watch you all will decide to try for one more to get a boy" etc. But honestly my husband is so thrilled to be a girl dad. I have 4 sisters and my dad gets this comment all the time still in his 50s but he always says "I was a really stupid teenage boy so I don't want to have a boy that takes after me lol".

[@RelatableMotherhood]

I think when you're a mom in the thick of raising super little kids it can feel like you're just surviving. It really is just a season though. As they get older, your relationship will grow and change and you'll feel a little more like you again. I do agree there's value in spending more time being married before having kids though. Becoming parents is a huge permanent game changer and I totally think it's a good idea to be married and do all the things that will be harder to do when you have kids. We had kids at 23, after 3 years of marriage. This was a really interesting video! =)

[@veronicaelise5120]

Good video! I’ve changed a lot already only 4 mo in. I thought I’d be strict about sleep schedules and turns out I’m a pretty free spirited parent. Might have to change that as she grows, though. Also, totally relate with the snot, drool and poop. Somehow it doesn’t phase me at all.

[@dichang3]

With the cost of real estate and living these days, the likely hood of my child still living with me until he's over 20 is pretty high.

[@marietagarvanska103]

Hahahaha, I just was thinking of this. It's a bit far-fetched to be thinking for sure that at 20 you are done. There is SO much that can go wrong.

[@sarahkrauss3329]

Love this series, especially this episode!

[@ankiutanpytte]

Love this! Looking forward to see which mindsets I will have changed in a year or so. 😂 Due last of Feb 2022! ❤

[@clickity5]

I really appreciate your honesty & time for putting this together. Please keep sharing! I'm expecting my first baby in 4 weeks & watching your videos have been so practical & reassuring 😭🙏❤

[@shugniquawallace3932]

Congratulations

[@caitandrews533]

I think an opposite video could be interesting too, what has stayed the same because I think it's so common for things to change Based on social media I thought of be traveling all over the place with my baby... Wow my view on that has changed. I never realized how much heartache was behind those perfect photos of mom and baby on the beach in Florida. I literally can't go anywhere without a rocking chair :( and even if I could ugh it's not worth the hassle. I never thought I would think travel isn't worth the hassle and just stay home

[@lady8ugch3f]

I had similar to you that when I was pregnant ( with my 10 month daughter) I wanted to be a boy mom. As soon as I found out I was having a girl that want all went away ...if I have a second child I really have no preference. (We don't wear matching outfits but she is funny, tough, and tries to get into everything)

[@Neesatou]

I don’t understand the concept of not avoiding discipline and nit making unnecessary conflict. Maybe do a video on your discipline tips ?

[@suzanchristiaanse8972]

Having 4 kids is a lot of work, but also a major addition of co2 emissions which in these times of climate crisis is not ideal. Not shaming anyones choices, but it’s definitely something to think about. If you want a big family you could also offer a loving home for foster children. There are so many who need it.

[@CAMILLALARSEN]

Great video! I guess there’s hope for me to not be grossed out by kids too one day 😂🙌🏼

[@Adrian-zi8uq]

In regards to waiting to have kids. I thought that I was ready to have kids right after college. Get it done. I had my first at 31, after 7 years with my husband (2 married) and it was the hardest adjustment; mostly from the mental standpoint. I struggled terribly with PPA, so I am *very* thankful that I waited. Now it's the back and forth of when to start trying for a second. I would ideally like to have 3 kids, (I was the youngest of 2 and always wanted a little sibling), but my husband is dead set on 2. Sooooo, it'll be an interesting few years. Haha.

[@kaitlyn8889]

Before having a baby I thought at nap time you just plopped them in the crib away , boy was I wrong 🤣 13m and still nursing to sleep strong. Also I'm 26 and always say I wouldn't of minded waiting another year or two , boy do I miss my freedom and sleep some times haha

[@darbirhian]

Not everyone meets their spouse in their teens or early 20s. I was 30 when I met my spouse, and we had our first child when I was 32 and second at 35. I was a "late bloomer" and also always looked younger than my age. Plus my fertility was really high, even at my advanced age! haha If I "had my way", I would have had my last child at 30, so only a 5 year difference. I wasn't in the right space in my early to even mid 20s to have children. We are all different. Kids out of the home between 40 and 50 is not that big of a difference. Both age ranges are middle aged. Plus, they are independent and able to do their own thing long before 20.

[@joannak6121]

I need to join your discord. My little one is almost 5 months and I'm dying to talk to other new moms. Doesn't help that I moved 6 hours north and switched careers while 7 months pregnant with surprise baby 😅

[@vvviiiiiicccc]

I'm due in January with my first and am excited to see what my mindsets are. I haven't really done much research.

[@stupefyedits1633]

Congratulations!!!

[@Arkiegirl26]

Baby #1 i was 24...baby #2 I was a month from 38. Baby 1 was easier in my ability to keep up. To be more active with her. We tried keeping our lifestyle and adapting her to us...😂. She was chill and happy. Baby 2...😳😭😩😵😴=🤶. Im old. Everything hurts. Im exhausted and she is NOT chill. So yeah there ya have it

[@ملتقىدجلةوالفرات]

From My experience my life ended the time i accidentally had a child 😅 never expected it to be soooo hard

[@verenamonika602]

I have a 3 month old daughter and it's really time taking its not u just integrated in your life, in the beginnig ut feels like its all about the baby , I am happy when she sleeps in the eving and I can have some time for myself til I also go for sleep, with gender I think even if u want girl or boy, god/ higher plan always gives / brings u the right baby soul to u thats what we maybe should keep in mind if someone is disappointed, with age I think it's good to hav babies in 20th I dong think it gets easier to be preganat with older age..depending also how many kids u want am 29 with my first now not that young thoight I could not have imagined having babies erlier, and now also after 1 I think 2 max is 3 kids but I see how it goes am busy with one for now everthing else I will see how it comes

[@samantha_hdez]

Mennnn…. Have I changed my mindset after becoming a mum.

[@LSK1]

Hey

[@shugniquawallace3932]

New here

[@candiclaus]

Just want to add that your thirties aren’t “later in life” haha!!!