No friends in Retirement? It's a thing!

[@thejourney7395]

Retired 2 years. No friends. I have some hobbies and enjoy peaceful days. I never liked crowds and couldn't be happier.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I'm not a fan of crowds either. That's why I like my metal detecting hobby. Buzz

[@jc4evur661]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage Ever find anything good?

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

@@jc4evur661 my wife. ( That's my favorite line) All kinds of things. Coins, keys, rings, watches and a few what the hell is that. Lol

[@jc4evur661]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage I don't think I've ever seen a metal detectorist under 50. If bored, you should try magnet fishing...lotsa good YT videos about that!

[@scotsmanofnewengland7713]

I loved my retirement at 72 yr old and been retired for 11 years now. Kayaking,fishing,camping,traveling sightseeing, working around the house, wood crafts, making my own bacon in a smoker and pulled pork and etc. Hobbies are something all retired and so to be retired people need. I run into old friends at wakes or funerals sad to say. Life is Good Enjoy

[@randydupere7787]

I’m 66 retired 8 years and I live very rural. Surrounded by forest and nature. Love it. I’ve found peace.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Sounds like a good place to be.

[@boondocker7964]

Surrounded by trees and squirrels? I understand. From time to time, Bears, Deer, Moose are seen on my two acres of Earth.

[@debbiecichowski7756]

Me too

[@trishaarenas5378]

❤

[@Odawa]

Better to be alone than to be in bad company.

[@TheCyberMantis]

Exactly.

[@tedthesailor172]

Quite agree...

[@wsmith3849]

@@Odawa I experience mostly two categories, current and future disappointments.

[@joekeusch5995]

​@@wsmith3849isn"t that truth??

[@Barnabas45]

That goes for women also!

[@timcavanagh3622]

Been retired a year and a half. This popped up on my feed today. I thought I was the only one. This is the best "feel good" video I've seen. I've been sitting around here thinking I have issues. My PTSD leftover from my service was always my go-to to blame. Now I'll just enjoy my solitude knowing I'm not alone....Alone.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Nope. You're definitely not alone! Buzz

[@tonydavis8650]

All my healthy friends have passed on!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

@@tonydavis8650 luck of the draw

[@trishaarenas5378]

❤

[@rosaoddin4338]

True friends are rare, whether retired or not. If you have even ONE true friend in a lifetime, you are fortunate indeed.

[@eugeniustheodidactus8890]

BINGO !!!

[@stuartstibbs2069]

Yep. You nailed it. Friends or no friends it doesnt really matter. Tried all my life to stay in touch with people...a lot of it is a one way street. If they dont reciprocate, I eventually give them the flick. No great loss, happy days.😂😅🎉🎉

[@JB777z]

I’ve found it difficult keeping friends as well. My husband is my only friend. I think I’m fortunate these days. People can be a lot of work ..families included. We like our quiet life these days.

[@lexa_power]

Indeed

[@ltcajh]

My friend from 6th grade died. That was tough.

[@stevebrinkert3649]

My dog. Always happy to see me. Loves going for rides in the truck. Doesn't talk much and easy to get along with. He's a good friend. 🐶

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Those are the best pals! Been thinking hard about getting another one but who would outlive who? Lol

[@TimothyStclair-v4p]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage there are older dogs needing a chance.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

@@TimothyStclair-v4p Absolutely! My daughter volunteers at a shelter and she knows what we're looking for but that shelter has mostly pit bulls and that's not our style.

[@ricks3344]

When he talks, what does he have to say?

[@929cbr_rr]

@@ricks3344 ha ha, well, mostly, woof, arf, and bow wow ! But that's ok, I understand the schipperke just fine ! Usually she just looks at me, and I know what she wants.

[@proteus5]

"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity." - Albert Einstein

[@pppaaattt4671]

Oh, so true

[@skippygotrobbed]

Same here. Love it.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Smart man.

[@peter-pg5yc]

I love not having to explain

[@FS-rf1uj]

When you grow up as a child in situational solitude (E.g. no brothers or sisters or large extended family) it’s perfect conditioning for dealing with solitude as an adult, it’s what you are used to, no big deal..

[@Dave1975-n2o]

72 live on my own, actively avoid people and any interactions with them, have a dog and that’s all I need

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Dogs are the best!

[@wasillastacker]

🫎🫎

[@trishaarenas5378]

❤

[@rapideddie1399]

I’ve been retired 9 years now. No friends other than my immediate family, but this is the first comment thread that’s made me feel normal. Thank you, Buzz.

[@thewayidoit8895]

Some of us struggle with immediate family. One kid is just too smart and dis owned us, another moved away so it's hard to help her. Why do they think we'd want to travel 3000 miles round trip even once a year. We miss the grandkids but not the stresses.

[@danamissouri]

​@thewayidoit8895 Sadly, I have a child who basically disowned us for the same reason. Married into money and now we're looked down on.

[@Val-13]

Exactly! Glad to have seen Buzz’s video and read all of the comments. My husband and I are very content just doing our own thing together.

[@FighterPilot1945]

@@danamissouri thats sad but karma will catch them up!

[@caseytcat888]

@@danamissouri family is interesting. I have none. I have friends who do and every single one has hurtful issues going on. I wonder who's better off.

[@daciefusjones8128]

Just because I'm alone doesn't mean that I am lonely.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

True!

[@beverleyreid563]

You got it.

[@moebanshee]

I am always saying that being alone isn't being lonely. You can be lonely in a room with a thousand people

[@Greg29]

Same

[@cjsteele9594]

My two dogs keep me company.

[@safeworld9775]

Many people mistake acquaintances for friends.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

That's true.

[@justadudeintheworldman.120]

I’ve had to learn this over and over. Work “friends” immediately go away once you don’t work together anymore.

[@zombieapocalypse3837]

@@justadudeintheworldman.120 Absolutely. Been through it many times.

[@alansach8437]

True, but if all you ever had are acquaintances, they are your friends. Real, close friends, who would drop anything to help you out with anything, and that you can talk with about anything are extremely rare and hard to come by. My wife comes to mind, and one guy in my whole life who passed several years ago. Everyone else has been an acquaintance. Some have been close acquaintances, but acquaintances nonetheless. I think that most people would find the same. But it's dangerous to label people. Then you get into that, "Well, he's not REALLY a friend" thing, and let's face it, you have to BE one first.

[@sxwrtr918]

Indeed! Know someone who refers to someone he has intermittent five-minute chats with in the park as a " friend," the same as he does a longtime close buddy of his. No sense of the difference. Always thought that was odd.

[@kathrynkastner8547]

The peace is magical! I can’t believe how wonderful our “little piece of heaven is.”. I love this new life and small cocoon.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

There are benefits!

[@paulchapman1933]

Happy as hell. I bought a dog. People suck, dogs love.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

True!

[@odapty]

Dogs are the best friends❤❤❤❤❤

[@Jaded57]

@@paulchapman1933 I know you don’t know me…. But EVERY post that I see that mentions a dog I always respond with …… dogs will always be better than humans… hands down 🐶🐶🐶

[@estebancorral5151]

You are mind manipulated by dogs. They are moochers that leave shit on the furniture and pee on the floor. The ex-neighbor had to collect his mail at the post office because the dog repeatedly would bite the postal carriers. When someone sued him, he settled for a lower amount and had the dog euthanasized.

[@marietjiehildebrandt1324]

Love it🎉

[@sira451]

Retired, 70, single female, 1 good friend who lives 2,000 miles away 😅 I'm content, peaceful, happier than I've been in a long time. The best thing about these last years of my life is not having to answer to anyone and do whatever I want, whenever I want. Finally putting myself first!

[@thomashunt413]

Agreed.

[@agreetodisagree4751]

Retired, 67, female, moved away from everybody. Moved to the Pacific Northwest and had a little house fixed up just how I like it. I pretty much snipped everybody out of my life for various reasons. Guess I'm just not able to accommodate what is expected by other people. Eat and drink what I want, where I want, got a hunting dog that goes everywhere with me, we take long walks in the forests most days, except I just broke my ankle, which really makes me think about potential for permanent disability, but I'll deal with that when/if it comes up. I talk to people here and there for 15 minutes or so, then I'm on my way. Getting a van and we'll go see a few things on my bucket list. Happiest I've ever been.

[@mondo851]

You nailed it. I'm 63 and retired a few years ago. Gave up the chance to work an extra five years with big financial incentives. Freedom becomes more important as our cache of future years grows smaller.

[@paulbird3235]

Enjoy!.

[@cindylou3708]

My best friend lives across the country too. We have phone dates about every 2 weeks.

[@ScarlettFire341]

"Do not fear having no friends. Fear having bad friends” ― Benjamin Franklin “Being alone is not a path of loneliness, but a pilgrimage of self discovery & growth” In the silence their is much to be heard!

[@elonever.2.071]

The first 4 years of my retirement I preferred to be alone. I learned to meditate even while walking and do some deep introspection that I used to understand what it is to be human. Now I can say I understand myself pretty well with regard to what and why people/situations bothered me; what motivated me to seek the work I did and the people I tried to interact with and what boundaries I allowed to be breached. Now I have very strong boundaries, much more empathy for others, have more tolerance for others (within respectful limits) and savor the alone time even more than I did when I was younger.

[@ardshielcomplex8917]

Theres a difference between Loneliness and "Aloneness".

[@charlotteb.derrick5117]

Thank you so much for Benjamin Franklins words….I was just having a down moment…I have lost all of my immediate family and loss my best friend the end of June….i am grateful to be an artist and still working….one never knows when they say something meaningful how it might touch someone faraway….Glad I found Buzz’s retirement garage…we are all headed in the same direction just in different vessels….so it is nice to wave are give a shout out…never know when someone might just need a smile are a boost! Again thank you…I am going to put what you shared on my bulletin board!💙

[@deliaabesamis-z5y]

So…. Maybe your wife is your only friend?

[@VictoriaRico-k1n]

@@ScarlettFire341 True That!

[@rodan57]

Retired 10 yrs. The older I get the less tolerance I have for superficial people. People suck and dogs rule. Give me a dog any day - that’s a TRUE friend and all I need

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Dogs are the best.

[@elvisfan6475]

Im 60 and retired. I dont need drama. I pay my bills. Go to the grocery store. I have my beagle with me always. We go on drives and watch tv and relax in my chair. I get on the internet now and then. But love to play my dvds and record albums. The world has changed and not for the better. I play it safe.

[@LKVince11]

Sounds like a wonderful, peaceful life!

[@shydiatl]

I have two dogs and one is a beagle.

[@TylerG7777]

Great comment. I feel the same.

[@peter-pg5yc]

Me too I love peace retired at 47 now 66.. master mr fixit..

[@daveanolik8837]

Safe from what?

[@simonhodgetts6530]

I learnt a long time ago that work colleagues are not friends. They’re just people you had no choice but to spend the day with once upon a time - once you’re out of that workspace, you’re forgotten.

[@lovedrummin]

So true. The first work day after I retired, I got a phone call from my old supervisor trying to locate something. Haven't heard from anyone since then.

[@peter-pg5yc]

My boss had a bet when i was hired with vp that i would not last. how fed up is that.

[@KSAnsley]

​@lovedrummin how often do you call any of them? Not giving you shit as much as saying.. we need to do things to make things happen sometimes. Good luck with it all..

True words spoken here

[@afritimm]

Some truth to that, although many people actually do make a friends at work that last. I know i did.

[@MFG333]

I had "friends" my entire working career. Now I'm free of their backstabbing betrayals and glad of it

[@Charlee-w1u]

I hear you a few good friends last a lifetime, most or fickle.

[@jimmyhvy2277]

MFG : were you in Mining as well ?

[@MFG333]

@@jimmyhvy2277 No, but betrayal seems to be a common issue all across the human race.

[@vincentyanni6252]

I agree back stabbing fake friends happy now after retirement

[@MFG333]

@DeltaLimaActual I did not say they were friends through work. I said, "working career" by which I intended to reference a period of time. I'm retired now and that era of life has ended. My "friends" came through community interaction. School, Church, children, social interaction and all the normal type of relationships. But people are fallen and full of sins. It is a hard thing to be the person that reveals that in others. I'm not making any political comment, but I think Trump is that kind of person. That is why he is so hated by those who love their sin and want it concealed. Truth will out!

[@Blackavian]

I have one true friend-my husband. If I outlive him, my friends will be my cats, my books, my imagination, and my movies. I will mourn the loss of my husband, but I will not look to replace him, because no one could. Age: 72, married: 46 years. Female. I love my cocoon.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

You sound exactly like my wife. Exactly.

[@Blackavian]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage I will take that as a compliment. She must be wonderful for you.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

@@Blackavian We've been married 41 years and what you said is what my wife tells me all the time.

[@Blackavian]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage I think it's wonderful that she tells you that you can't be replaced by anyone. I'm also glad that she will be happy with books, movies, and her imagination. I think it indicates she is mentally and emotionally strong.

[@carolynbunn6358]

Sounds like my future life, I'm 70 and hubbie still works , Only no cats for me .I gave 8 avairys with budgies and a dog

[@willpartin622]

I'm an introvert and have never had a wide circle of friends. Now that I'm retired I have no problem being alone. I actually enjoy the piece and time to do as I please. No drama

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Sometimes that's a good thing! Buzz

[@nanwilder2853]

FYI : You mean, “. . . enjoy the PEACE. . .” You’re welcome.

[@mikekay6288]

Me too! Always been a loner; don't mind my own company; just need some basic social interaction to say 'g'day'; that's all. Mike in Oz

[@soundjudgement3586]

No one can be content in isolation. Not even with a pet. I have few friends but need the telephone interaction. One narcissistic friend I also take shopping.

[@carolynbunn6358]

As a woman Iv noticed those so called friends either bring drama and gossip, And what about the borrowers.Somtimes it's a relief if you fall out with a so called friend.

[@stevechrisman3185]

It's refreshing to find someone who's able to make the proper distinction between friends and acquaintances.

[@northerniltree]

Friends come and go, but a true enemy will last forever.

[@davidc4233]

Wives come and go, but ex-wives are forever....lol.

[@starboy1100]

Thank god for enemies. I need something to fight.

[@donmcmillan4388]

The shirt off my back or the skin off my knuckles. Lol

[@RichieRich-pn3gg]

no one cares

[@billharden7127]

👍

[@tazzel2699]

Never think the people at work are your friends. A fatal mistake

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Not true. I could call many from the last 40 years and they'd help me out if needed. I wouldn't call them friends but definitely strong acquaintances.

[@Slamitdownhard]

I only have one true friend. That's all that I have ever needed. We have been friends since 7th grade, I'm 64 now. We worked together, vacationed together, he is like a brother. I'm an introvert and he was gracious enough to drag me out into the world and give me experiences that I never would have known. He has colon cancer now and my biggest fear is that I will lose the rock that has been my anchor most of my life. Say a prayer for my best friend Jim.

[@aquariusmoon771]

❤

[@oliviaglass3843]

I think we all only have one true friend that we gain as children, or young people. Grown ups are are suspicious of wanting to a

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Prayers up for Jim! I wish you well on this journey. Buzz

[@Jorma-e4t]

Great to have a friend like that, God bless

[@user-st6nt4ou6f]

May God be with him.

[@GLADIATOR-tz7yt]

The absense of my job removed a major source of daily interaction and purpose and the transition from saving to spending has been eye opening, revealing how each withdrawal now impacts my savings growth. This has made me acutely aware of the importance early financial planning and the emotional toll of losing that daily sense of purpose as most of my friends and family continue with their routines.

[@all4mom-xv1hp]

Same. And I'm not happy about it.

[@HananOich]

I'm approaching retirement and having a financial advisor has been helpful. I started investing later than most, so relying on compound interest from index funds or bonds wasn’t enough for me. Despite that, I’ve managed to do well and am on track to retire with around $6 million

[@GLADIATOR-tz7yt]

I'm currently reassessing my retirement portfolio and could use some guidance. How can I get in touch with your advisor?

[@trainhead3]

I went through the same thing and a lot of people do. After about a year, I started to ease into it a little more. Now almost 3 years in and am enjoying retirement for the most part. It’s a tough journey, but know that you are not alone. try and look at it as a liberation from the daily grind of work :-)

[@HananOich]

I would have preferred not to give a specific recommendation, as I was made to understand everyone's situation differs, however my experience working closely with Emily Ava Milligan over the years has been exceptional. You might find it worthwhile to see if she aligns with your needs

[@wingrider1004]

I've been retired 4 years. You pretty much nailed it. Retirement is not what people think think it is. Real friends are rare at any point in life...

[@WiseAdvice93]

My daughter died at 20. For the first year as I was trying to come to grips with it and didn't think I could make it without losing my mind, I had unexplainable signs that brought me peace, and she came to me in a dream that was so real that I didn't want it to end as we hugged each other. I even felt the warmth in my arms when I woke up. I do believe God allowed her to comfort me until I was able to stand on my own. In fact, I almost didn't want to get better because I knew once I did and didn't need the comfort anymore, the signs and dreams would end. I did come to acceptance, and It has ended. But I still feel she is always near. I miss her so much.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Sorry to read about your daughter. I know exactly how you feel. My daughter passed at 34 in 2020 from ovarian cancer. There isn't a day that goes by that we don't think of her. We'll never be the same again. We both have to keep moving forward. Take care my friend.

[@vester7457]

@@WiseAdvice93 I've never had children, never married. Turned 66 yesterday. You've been through a meatgrinder. Really really hard

[@Cindyscrossstitch]

I am sorry for your loss. She is with you, just not in this realm. You will see her again one day🌻

[@GlenJohnston-b9j]

🙏

[@Ann-eb8dp]

I have seen a number of people who have passed

[@marilynpeppers1356]

As a younger woman, I used to complain to my husband that he didn’t spend enough time with us (his family). I progressed to realize that he was working long hours to provide for us because he loved us and what he had leftover from working long hours he actually DID spend with us…going to ballgames, etc. He gave us what he was able to humanly give us. He’s still going at it in his upper 70’s now, keeping the house in repair and mowing our big yard. Thank you husbands every one for all you gave your families.💜

[@mahkuntizitchy2083]

Oh thank god for you Marilyn!💖 There's FAR too few women that appreciate the sacrifices a good man makes for the love & security of the nest! You truly are one in 10 million! 👍

[@lutherthompson2642]

I never could give mine enough $$$ after enduring it for years working constantly so I eventually got rid of her , best decision I ever made,, should have done it many years earlier

[@usps7658]

@@lutherthompson2642 Lol

[@ashlyknapp1798]

@@lutherthompson2642 sounds hurtful.

[@GeoMo52]

Thanks for understanding

[@Thoughtworld1984]

If a man has two true friends during his life, he is blessed.

[@m7j23s53]

No doubt.

[@michaelcarley7016]

Until you find out they too don't care

[@ChuckDintfuck]

So true my grandpa taught me if you count 5 friends on one hand in your lifetime you have done good.

[@thewayidoit8895]

I have 1 and my dog. Maybe my wife but we will see at the end.

[@Keith-j7h3v]

I have wondered about this topic, as I enter my mid 60's. I've had 8 or 9 lifelong close friends , some we met in junior high. Unfortunately I've lost more than half of them from military service, accidents, and terminal medical issues. I spent my primary work life as a prototype machinist / production engineer / CNC programmer. I figure I'll track down Hot Rod / car clubs , boat clubs, and flying clubs, attend a few meetings if they'll let me, and see if I can find a few new friends to introduce to the remainder of my lifelong friends that are still around. Anything with an engine usually needs replacement parts sooner or later. I may be able to help out some like minded people in the process. Thank you for posting this , and starting the dialogue. Take care. Good luck.

[@johnstangl256]

Retired from a stressful middle school teaching position four years ago. Made a complete break from there. I totally love being alone: no emails, no worthless meetings, no angry parents, no paperwork, no disrespectful students. I am enjoying taking piano/art lessons, reading, walking. I have no desire to make acquaintances or friends. Life is good.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Excellent!

[@Elizabeth-yg2mg]

Teaching would be rough--I don't blame you for that relaxing new life.

[@Novemberrain111]

I no your happy your done w the school System! Enjoy🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@MarshaMarsha885]

Working in the school system your comment is so true. I can see and understand why a teacher would want nothing to do with that aspect of their life again. Good on you.

[@marshallgiles6255]

I am 60 year old man. I have one true friend, that is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

[@kevinrice7635]

Agreed that's the way I am 🎉

[@LetsTravelThisYear]

That's kind of one way.

[@theophilus2575]

Agreed. There is no greater love than from this friend.

[@mikem820]

In other words you have no real friends

[@NicholsonNeisler-fz3gi]

Get a dog!

[@danreilly7491]

Not many friends and i'm getting sick of that guy in the mirror he looks a lot older than I do! Scary

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Yeah but I bet he's a cool dude! Don't underestimate him!

[@Cherokee-r8h]

Huhhhhhmmmm I am on my way to 50-something funeral.

[@danielmart7940]

He's the ghost of lives not lived😢

[@JeeesS11]

😂😂😂

[@ImaOkie]

I don't know who he is but the sob is wearing my clothes !

[@user-nh4tm6hh4j]

The old saying was if you want friends be a good friend. Over my life I tried to help people, I had cook outs, I gave advice to people who asked for it. No one ever reciprocated. Truth is the reason most people don't have friends is because most people are not good at being a friend. They won't make time for you and they won't go out of their way to help you. Sad state of affairs.

[@jant4741]

My mom pulled it off, but she was clever about who she socialized with. Her book club was full of Drs. that became her friends. She was very careful about the image she projected, dress & speech & her husband was a true gentleman, well liked.

[@RubenPerez-r2y]

You hit the bullseye ~ people DO NOT reciprocate at all and are ungrateful , especially if they are married

[@BeckyM154]

Truth. People never care as much as they say they do.

[@margaretbroadway7358]

I absolutely agree with your comment as I have opened my home many many times and I am a woman, so the ladies have always been excited to come over for a tea party, lunches, etc. and we always have a great time. It has hardly ever been reciprocated and in some cases I haven't even been in their homes. If I call them they are happy to hear from me and say they've been thinking about me but never take the initiative to call first. I have moved most of them to my outer circle and spend lots of time by myself now and am OK with it. One sided "friendships" grow old.

[@trinity7776]

Depicted well in the 1974 film The Great Gatsby. When the money ran out everybody disappeared. BTW, that film bombed at the time but by today's standards it is a great film. They don't make anything like they used to.

[@johnbrzezinski1446]

When my mother was in a nursing home in her 80's and 90's, I noticed that almost everyone there sat alone and apart from others. When dining, almost nobody spoke to others. The staff organized things to keep these people busy, but they still didn't interact on a personal level. By that time, all their close relatives and friends were either elsewhere (unreachable) or had died. It was sad to see and made me wonder if I'll be sitting alone with my thoughts or if I'll be that one old geezer who greeted everyone coming and going with a smile and a hearty "Happy Monday!" Almost 20 years ago my wife and I went to a supper club in Wisconsin for dinner and had to sit at the bar until they a table opened up. We had a question about something and turned to the elderly man sitting next to my wife. And we engaged in a conversation and he was 90. After a while, my wife excused herself to visit the restroom. Almost immediately the old guy leaned over and said, "I just can't wait to die." I expressed shock, but he explained that his wife head died some 20 years earlier; relatives and friends his age had all died years ago. Meanwhile his daughter lived in St. Louis and his son in Texas. Moreover, he said that he had enjoyed a full life, owned his own business, had a happy marriage, and traveled extensively. There was nothing left he wanted or could do. He said he hated that he had to lie to his daughter about driving at night. He said that his kids kept needling him to move into the retirement home. "I would rather die," he said. Having seen the quality of life that my mother "enjoyed" between 90 and 99, I fully understand. I think about that man, every now and again, and regret not inviting him out to go fishing.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

That's an excellent, albeit sad story. I saw the movie about the Aokigahara Forest in Japan. More than 100 people a year go there to die. (That they know of). I won't get into options for end of life but both situations you described are natural, yet unnatural at the same time. I did take my father-in-law fishing and each time I wondered if it would be his last. Obviously, the last trip was his last, but we didn't know that at the time. Strange that we come to these crossroads, and we do have to think about how our exit will be carried out. In the meantime, I'm the old fool who screams out happy Saturday every day of the week! Buzz

[@johnbrzezinski1446]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage You'll be screaming Happy Monday and I'll be screaming "Happy Friday!" And staff will simply up the dose of some calming narcotic. 😂✌

[@Bewilderdashed11]

I am eighty and yes every one I knew all my life has died and it is kind of sad but every once in a while I discover there are a few of us that are left and that gives us a bright spot and something to talk about too

[@johnbrzezinski1446]

@@Bewilderdashed11 That's the spirit! I sometimes wonder whether I would want to precede my wife in death or the other way around, and struggle because I know it would be hard for her to manage all the things we now share in doing. But the idea of her being gone is unimaginable. It would be like losing my hearing or sight. I guess it's fortunate that we don't have any idea when the music will stop. All the best, my friend.

[@silverdale3207]

Be the old Geezer. My sister and I tried to get Mum and Dad into a retirement village as Mum had dementia and Dad was doing everything and needed the support from nursing staff, She died before they could get in and Dad said he didn't really want to go now as he was still fit and able, we agreed and helped him find a smaller house only 500metres from where he was and talked him into getting a cat for company. He'll be 90 in september, still very active and is loving life my sister and I are both widowed now and we are only half an hour away each so we meet there every week to see him. If you've still got your health and people to visit you you're sweet.

[@Michael-s2p3p]

Retired ER physician here, big changes with limited interactions now but loving every minute of it. Traveling and paying attention to my hobbies!

[@ginbro008]

I worked 30 plus in healthcare. I interacted with patients, family members, people I worked with every day. I don't really make close friends and am really enjoying not having to deal with other people every day. Solitude is fine with me and I can always find something to occupy my time. Gives me time to think.

[@lisadobbie7109]

Many of us seniors loved being social, as young people, and now as old people would rather be alone. Time and life's drama changes us as people.

[@ranger178]

less idiots to deal with LOL

[@peter-pg5yc]

well i retired at 47 and peoples just feel like they failed and get weird. i just say im good with monies. Then they shut up. Tried to help high school buddy to invest save. He blew me off he will work until he dies. Never talked finances ever again. But he gets weird im 19 years retired. And i save too much need to spend more.

[@gphilipc2031]

YES!

[@lorraine9320]

@@megarth1 I exist on my S.S. Mortgage still, divorced. 25 yr old vehicle. Grew up that way so really doesn't matter that life went back that way. My 77 yr old brother saved all his life, never married, after Mommy died, received house, land etc. everything. Me & other brother got nothing. Anyway, he has about 3 million after years of working and mommy banked his $$ etc.Never even made his own lunch. He lives like a hermit. Water still comes from a spring up back, pipe broke but won't spend the $$ for anyone to fix it, still with manual coal furnace, complains a lot. Never had any friends. Lent him a two burner counter electric burner, new,, in box. I'd put it on the junk pile. But fixed it when broke, was only an extra for parties, & still uses. Washes clothes w/old plunger in old wash tub. Hauls his own coal in an old truck, shovels into cellar, takes out ashes all winter and complains, complains, complains about his life. His age, still have to do everything by myself. Gets annuities along w/S.S. On Christmas Day on my way home stopped in to tell him I'd be down the next day. Gave him a small gift. He started. I lasted about 5 - 7 minutes, left. New Years, same thing, only lasted about 4/5 minutes. I left.

[@gurnblanston5000]

​@@peter-pg5yc nah, yer goot

[@lonestarintn9137]

Retired 62 after 23 yrs in USAF and 20 yrs as contractor. Don’t wanna know anyone as I watch the U.S. fall into a darkness of hate and deceit. 😢

[@wanderingwarrior5626]

Always been there, in the U.S. It was so obvious to me as a 10yr old in the 1950's. Family members hated each other, neighbors hated each other. When I entered the workforce, it was there too. People just tried to concel it. Now, they don't care to anymore. So, rub it in your face daily. Welcome to reality!

[@RobertFairweatherLuvMachine]

Get on the road and go camping. ..you meet the nicest people...try the national parks.....Thank you for your service! It ain't as bad as he news will lead you to believe...

[@DR3itmatters]

@@lonestarintn9137 thank so much for your service!💜🙏

[@dannyho6786]

@@RobertFairweatherLuvMachine yeah, then U run the risk of getting in the crosshairs of remote serial killers !

[@gphilipc2031]

AND, that since the 1970's or earlier. Deceit rules the day.

[@mw9984]

It seems the older one gets, the harder it is to make friends. Especially in our time of division in so many ways. I prefer no friends over false friends and I am content with that.

[@brianmatthews4323]

It's funny, when I was a young man, people were always coming over and hanging out at my house. It's like it was the place to be, or something. Now at 60, no one visits.

[@jackieclan815]

​@@brianmatthews4323 sorry bro

[@JB777z]

@@brianmatthews4323sorry…I know how you feel 😢

[@Kjt853]

I sometimes think that the reason has to do with family responsibilities. When I was in my 20s, the true friends I had were, like me, single. As people got married and started having children, I saw less and less of them. I myself married late (39 at the time); I made some friends in my 40s, but now, some 30 years later, even though their children are grown and on their own, my friends started having grandchildren, and now the grandkids take up their time. If I counted on one hand the number of people I’m in regular contact with, several fingers would be left over.

[@alomaalber6514]

@@brianmatthews4323 thank you for sharing that, I thought it was just me or that the more popular or beer drinking boaters still had big groups of pals. I am prospering and learning to garden for the first time. Cheers.

[@stevenbest6923]

HEY! Consider yourself LUCKY, people suck.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Some really do.

[@elcidlord]

Yessssss they do.

[@Fulltang65]

Remember that old bumper sticker back in the 70s or 80s, it said “PEOPLE SUCK”, As a kid, I wasn’t really sure about that but now at 59 I understand it🤔

[@ImaOKay522]

"Life's a Beach" annoyed me as a very young woman! I am totally over it now!😂

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

People do the strangest things. Wasn't there a TV show with that name?

[@patrickprendergast9589]

so true

[@JefferyHagen]

I’m 59 too and difficult to even have a conversation with people now let alone know someone.

[@alwaysblessed7480]

I remember that bumper sticker. It holds true then and even more now! I'm now 67!

[@robertneville2022]

0 "friends " = 0 drama = 100 0/0 happiness

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I like your math! Buzz

[@sufyb6432]

You must be an introvert 😂

[@ronmudie240]

😂 Lol!

[@faxbullog8361]

Now that’s retirement!

[@BrandonMauldin-h5p]

I love it

[@Dinod56]

68 yrs. old. Retired in April of this year. This is me in a nutshell. Kind of relieved, I thought there was something wrong with me. No real close friends, but hundreds of acqaintances. Love the solitude.

[@rosemariekarlebach2571]

I’m retired too. Not too many friends, but I now have a chance to catch up with family via phone. I like it that way.

[@joanmacarthur7011]

Yep. Same here. Nice to hear this said.​@@rosemariekarlebach2571

[@kengorski5957]

Wow. I never expected so many people like me. 70, 3 years retired, no children or friends. Thanks for this. I feel better now. I am not alone.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Nope. Not alone. [e-mail] if you ever want to e-mail. We also have a nice subscriber following on the channel. We do LIVE shows on Saturday nights at 7 PM EST. You're always welcome! Buzz

[@JOHNSmith-pn6fj]

In High School I was a very popular guy, 40 years later I am pretty much a loner who enjoys the peace and quiet and lack of drama. True friends are very rare in this world, acquaintances are plentiful.

[@CaseyLouis]

Sounds like me.

[@Mrmajellan123]

We were all popular in high-school

[@sharonthepartyqueen5374]

You have a Best Friend, a wife. You really don’t qualify for being retired without friends. So many people are truly alone.

[@gracefrog9758]

I’m glad you pointed that out , my thoughts exactly.

[@birdlover6842]

The only reason why I would want to marry is for a best friend for life.

[@glendacastillo6504]

Some retirees are single. I travel and visit families in Europe and Asia. Life is good.

[@metalmike570]

I play bass guitar, and good enough to be in a band. I play electric guitar too, but didn't play that in a band yet. So every now and then I get with some other musicians. I've been retired a few years but I'm always busy, I also have a son that needs my help a lot. He is autistic and lower functioning.

[@vester7457]

Sharon, I'll second the other reply. I like Buzz, but married people maybe have a blind spot. Their spouse provides companionship, but they're so accustomed to this they take it for granted. Then, if a single person points out they lack even a spouse, they seem nonplussed, it's a reality they've never considered or thought about. I guess the main thing I've learned from Buzz's videos and the comments thereto is just how common it is to feel alone, isolated, and disappointed that more social contacts aren't mire than casual friends. It is not, after all, a circumstance people announce by walking around with sandwich board signs.

[@RobertRyan-ul8xq]

68. No friends; couldn't be happier!!! Set up a home gym; work out; healthy nutrition diet! Don't take any medications! I love the peace and quiet!!!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Good job. Mental toughness that not everyone possesses. Buzz

[@peter-pg5yc]

lucky duck prostate got me.like it does to 80% of all men.

[@andriajerner9837]

66 and no meds either! It's one great way to retire. Still figuring it out.

[@markme4]

Are you married ?

[@oscarrlee18]

Is it the PI

[@gypsysoul-otraveling4301]

Hi. I am so glad I found your KZbin. I feel so lonely, living without a purpose. I don't have family or friends. It is a really weird feeling not to have people, friends, or family around. I get you!!!!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I do have a wife so that helps but no guy friends to run with like the old days. Buzz

[@alanmonroe6585]

I’ve been retired for 8 years and have no “friends” and I’ve never been happier. Honest truth.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Seems to be a common theme in the comments. Buzz

[@kennyc388]

ME TOO !!!

[@TJJS982]

😂

[@truthbetold-jq8iw]

I've been retired four years, and I don't have close friends. I worked for over 50 yrs. trying to make a living and didn't socialize because I didn't drink. When you are young it was easier because you had things in common like riding bicycles, playing baseball, football etc. Also your friends were free to do these things because they weren't working, they didn't have wives and children to take care of. This country has become so polarized with politics it's almost impossible just to have a conversation. It's sad.

[@wilmachaffin8517]

I tell people I don't talk about politics or religion, and I've been Christian for 46 years, but I will gladly discuss anything they want to talk to about Bible, but not getting into arguments with people about it. And politics, nope I say please I don't discuss that. My mom is one who loves to talk about it but I say mom change subject. But I get you. Not that we had lot of friends but now everyone got grandkids they have to watch or take to ball games? We had no kids just dogs and actually formed a group for our breed in Brookpark OH. After 6 years same thing, people found other interests and grandkids so few of us left.

[@michaell1665]

@@wilmachaffin8517 I disagree with your "don't talk about politics" comment, although my wife probably agrees with you. The only people today who are allowed to speak their little minds are the left-wing, woke idiots who MUST be tolerated... total BS in my opinion! I do tread lightly in conversation around polite friends and acquaintances, but I will not hold back the facts from woke acquaintances (definitely NOT friends) who brazenly give me their insane opinions. I believe strongly that the reason that the world is so insanely woke today is the unwillingness of the unwoke masses to give their opinions! Our opinions, whether you like them or not, have an effect in shaping the world!

[@helenhighwater5313]

@@wilmachaffin8517 Yep, once their grandkids come along you might as well forget them because you'll never see them again.

[@bbowjazz]

I’m 64 years old and retired 18 months ago from a 40 year tech career, where I probably interacted with as many as 50 people a day prior to Covid and WFH mode. I had planned to work a few more years, but my mother came down with dementia and her transition/care required more attention and energy than I had bargained for. My wife and dog are my best friends. I spend most of my days now seriously practicing music, keeping up with politics/finance and visiting my mother who is in steady decline. She told me decades ago that “you will be able to count your best friends in life on the one hand”. She has turned out to be correct and currently I would say that most of my “friends” are more like acquaintances.

[@truthbetold-jq8iw]

@@michaell1665 Drugs (legal & Illegal) , alcohol, indoctrination and brainwashing in our public schools, dishonest media and turning away from God has gotten us where we are today.

[@x00p3]

“Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few; friend to one; enemy to none.” ― Benjamin Franklin

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I like that.

[@VictoriaRico-k1n]

I like that. ❤Thanks for posting it.

[@pherdantler707]

Wandered across your video, Buzz, and your view of friends really echoes mine...you are not alone! With friends. I've always found two types of folks, those with lots of 'friends' and those with a few close friends (me). It's my opinion good friendships take work and making time for them is essential, taking time away from your valued sole pursuits. I feel incredibly fortunate to have been able to retire and have the where with all to pursue my interests. The sad part is the ever increasing loss of those few good friends with time. Happy retirement to you!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thank you and thanks for sharing. Buzz

[@jbro4779]

Not being obligated to attend social events has been liberating. I can't decide if I have lost all interest in everything or that for the first time in my life I am really content.

[@jjshoot2425]

70 here ,,, I feel the same .. had enough hoopla ----

[@usps7658]

@@jbro4779 Me to !!

[@simpson1672]

I find that I feel the same way. I think it was burnout at the end of it all.

[@bradbrockhaus633]

i think in my case its contentment

[@shirleyrankin-zf6nv]

Jon you are content so don’t worry

[@Atwater20]

Another issue with trying to make friends is that most people don't know how to have a good conversation. Most go on and on about themselves and never ask a thing about you, they like to hear themselves talk, and they're usually pretty boring.

[@user-ii3ot9he8r]

So true.

[@larrycarpenter-yt4ot]

Old farts don't listen and only want to talk about the past and their boring too.

[@bentnickel7487]

People that do that are lonely, have no friends and may go days without talking to anyone. I was a salesman for 48 years and ran into older folks like that everyday.

[@genespell4340]

Happy hour bartenders go through that. I always ask the bartender/s how they are doing. If I don't have something new to talk about, I leave them alone. I was a happy hour bartender so I know how to behave.

[@stevencook4002]

@@genespell4340😂

[@nopriors]

My Bible is "Walden" Henry DavidThoreau. I moved to rural Georgia from the most densely populated county in Florida. In the morning I open my backdoor and look out at the birds and woods, they are my friends. Piano , workshop, learning about restoring an old garden tractor. Haven't had a TV in 20 years. I learned in life there are people that wake up happy and people that don't. I wake up happy and am blessed. Free from want and my needs are met.

[@henrychinaski3720]

OMG! Me too…first read it in my 20s, read 10x since… Brilliant brilliant man was Henry… PS : even visited the pond a few years ago…

[@ghostryderinthesky]

The book that truly changed my life. Time to read it again.

[@nopriors]

@@henrychinaski3720 Lucky you. “I believe that men are generally still a little afraid of the dark, though the witches are all hung, and Christianity and candles have been introduced.”

[@vince1738]

Where in GA

[@nopriors]

@@vince1738 Decatur county

[@robertarnold695]

Just found your new friends in retirement, I've been in retirement 2 years and I have no friends. I was a truck driver so this is brought me close to my family. And that makes up for any friend in my book. Looking forward to seeing more of your channel pieces. Thanks Bob❤

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thank you !

[@mikehalpin3017]

What an eye opener and reality check after listening to your vid and reading all the comments! I thought something was wrong with me for feeling the way I do . Thank you all for your honest comments! I was guilt tripping myself for feeling so peaceful about my lack of interaction with people. I am 70 and have been fully retired since 64 and a widower since age 60 and I am doing just fine . Thank You and God Bless

[@MARYREED-nh7gb]

Yes, I'm 70 as well. I have folks who are good people, but I can't really open up to them as they have challenges in their lives. They call me basically for medical information. Like many, I prefer to listen to music on my CD player, do art, go for walks, or do needlework. Sadly, I'm not permitted a pet where I live. I think it's such relief not to have to deal with drama from some folks.

[@markjohnson6700]

All my friends were due to where i was at the time. Never had close - over time - friends and in 4 years of retirement (68) have been happily alone. Thank god for KZbin....

[@tomTom-lb5cu]

Me too

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

KZbin or other social media does help keep us connected with the human race. Good or bad. Lol Buzz

[@patrickprendergast9589]

me 2

[@emilcost8613]

Me too. My boys will send me a KZbin link... more times than not, I've watched it already! Life is just plain bizarre.

[@richardmorris7063]

I've owned my house for forty yrs as most of my neighbors, I try to reach out & go out to eat but I rarely get any takers. Life is weird.

[@af4od02]

I retired 3 years ago. I spend most of my time with my wife and dogs. I worked at a large university. I had many friends and acquaintances. Since retiring, I have seen very few of the folks I worked with. I don’t miss being in large groups. I spent 40 years wishing I could be at home with family, traveling and fishing. Now I get to follow that life path.

[@dCaddyshk]

@@Al-lv7vg Right On!

[@havenpersonalcare7968]

I served in the military for over 25 years; although, I do missed it at times; but, I do love my freedom; now in Asia tour for the past year. I'm appreciative of life. The reality of staying home with family is beyond awesome. Life is a blessing.

[@FindingJoy2022]

I retired 2 years ago. Since then, I've enjoyed a few bucket list trips including the Alaska Highway and the Arctic Ocean with a son-in-law. I have no "real" friends who I would consider a confidante. I plan to Explore all of the Natl Parks over the next few years.

[@DogBeast221]

Woof!

[@Cindyscrossstitch]

My grandmother told me when I was a child, if you make one good friend in your life you did good. How accurate that statement is. 🌻👣

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

She was smart!

[@erickrewson6419]

I am 76 and have been retired for 24 years, I had close friends that I hunted with and met for lunches or pot luck suppers often after I retired. Over the years some drifted away, some moved and lately they are dying on a regular basis. We still have a plant retirees luncheon every few months, it is great to see my old work partners but as far as close friends go, I don't have any left. I will say this to any younger people reading this, if you smoke, STOP TODAY! My smoker friends are going through absolute hell now with smoker relate illnesses if they haven't died from the same already. The cancers and heart problems have turned them into zombies wracked with pain and unable to do anything but suffer endlessly for their last years as they wait to die. They have no life.

[@philipgerry5228]

Great advice. I’m 72 and meet a few guys for coffee in a casual environment. We have several couple friends. That’s enough.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I quit smoking when my daughter was born in 1985. It was tough but I did it! Buzz

[@marcusvaldes]

A healthy life comes from healthful living!

[@hvacrnortheastern2110]

Yes l am lucky that l never got into smoking . It been 14 years since my father in law passed he retired at 60 .He really had only good 8 year’s in retirement the last 10 years was horrible he was on oxygen last year before be pass he was suffocating . He smokes for over 42 years.

[@Bob-The-Guy]

Too much drinking alcohol does something similar as well.

[@nivak11]

I retired relatively young (55) and my retirement led straight to COVID lockdowns. So, the first 16 months of my retirement was lockdown and social distancing. I came out of it having enjoyed spending time with myself (for the first time in my life) and I don't miss "friends" and "hanging out"! The peace I have achieved is something I am not letting go of.

[@SonnyPruitt-q1s]

In my 40+years on the job I was forced to be around people some I liked many I didn't,after being retired 8 years I do NOT want to be around people..I am very content without people,I have my bird,cats and fish,people just piss me off sooner or later.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

As they say, whatever makes you happy! That's the key. Thanks for sharing. Buzz

[@edsweeney6843]

People are always a disappointment 😢. I'll stick with my cats and dog.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

@@edsweeney6843 cat's and dogs are good!

[@davidmann4533]

I have always said the same thing sooner or later people piss you off

[@RichieRich-pn3gg]

hermit

[@FrankFerraris]

Just saw your video. I really enjoyed it. You have a really nice, easy going presentational style.. I think your channel is going to do well. I think there are a lot of men like you and me who devoted the last 40-50 years of their lives to working and raising a family. Establishing friendships wasn’t a priority. So when it was time to retire I was just happy to spend time with my wife and watch my grandkids play sports, etc. I was happy not to have to go to work every day. I’ve been retired for 8 years and I like the option of doing a little or a doing a a lot every day. Sometimes l’m alone and sometimes I’ll go to the local coffee shop and discuss th affairs of the day, It’s all good!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thank you for the comment. We think the same way in regard to our retirement.

[@FallacyAsPraxis]

Most people at ANY age don’t actually have any real friends. They just won’t admit it. Fake people on social media don’t count. It’s just the way the world is now. Even people you were once close to will move, change up on you, die… We come in alone, and so we go out. Make the most of your quality relationships while they last, that is the best that one can do.

[@dianabrown833]

It just seems like most people on social media are desperate. How sad.

[@davidsawicki676]

very wise!

[@davidsawicki676]

very wise indeed!

[@eddenoy321]

From age 5 until 19 I had enjoyable friends got together everyday. After that, just people I hung out with now and then. Today just familiar faces and greetings. I think it is the natural way of life. I am fortunate enough to be in a 30 yr. long relationship. She is my only friend.

[@deirdre108]

@@FallacyAsPraxis Good philosophy! I knew society was getting weird when people started blabbering about their hundreds/thousands of Facebook “friends “. And when friend became a verb, e.g. “‘friend’ me on Facebook”. I saw a New Yorker cartoon a few years ago that depicted this phenomenon perfectly. A few people were sitting around in chairs with a casket in the background, obviously at a funeral/memorial service. The caption was one person saying to the others: “I don’t know why there are only about a half dozen of us here today-he had thousands of friends on Facebook.”

[@dougstewart1817]

72, retired 12 years, 0 friends, lots of acquaintances. Very happy with my life. Love Jesus!

[@skippylippy547]

Same here. At first it was a bit odd. I thought maybe something was wrong. Now I'm content and enjoy the peacefulness of retirement.

[@aliekatsmom]

Amen

[@wjstephens4654]

Happy with my life too fighting the big con and lie of religion. Truth is sacred to me and we must overcome the ignorance, hatred and division of religion for the sake of progress, humanity and love.

[@davemorgan9511]

Same age, same amount of retirement. Found a friend…..

[@skippylippy547]

@@wjstephens4654 Uhm. 🤔 You're fighting the big con and lie of Religion? That's interesting to me. I'd like to know more. Can you give me more details please?

[@Encourageable]

Retired. No friends. And that’s the way I want it 😊.

[@mic2349]

After DJT I realized that the deplorables are a higher percentage than I previously thought. The odds that people in general will improve ones life are low. Get a dog, cat, or hedgehog, or even a soccer ball called Wilson.

[@JOHNSmith-pn6fj]

@@mic2349 That is so true.

[@BarryWeaver-pv6cz]

@@mic2349 The deplorables have always been there, they are just emboldened by Trump. But yes, it was better when they were quiet.

[@ickster23]

​@@mic2349You must be a real nice person to be calling others deplorable. Do you trip over that ego much?

[@donpizzo8963]

Same, it's like we've done it all and there's nothing to talk about. I saw this in seniors growing up and didn't understand it. Buzz hits it on the head. Talk to yourself, just hold a phone up and start talking. Doesn't have to be on.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I can talk to a blade of grass. When it starts talking back, look out! Buzz

[@rodneyavery3537]

5 years in retirement and no friends, i live in the country without neighbors and its great, people are crazy.

[@Gungadin0112]

I only wish I could live in the country without neighbors

[@timothyfoster3772]

im 65, no friends, i like it that way, i look back and realized the so called friends back then were just drinking buddies, caused nothing but trouble for me, i only have my wife and thats all i need now, i get on my motorcycle or go fishing where no one goes and im a happy man!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Excellent!

[@rallegra]

What about your wife’s opinion? LOL

[@benjaminrush4443]

I found early in life that "Friends" are based on convenience & coincidence. In reality - there are very few people you can rely upon. This situation can also include "Family". Work has an effect upon your interaction with people. Get into a "Troubling period" and see how many "Friends" you have. Thanks for the reality of life.

[@gphilipc2031]

It's the stuff folks don't want to talk about but OH so real.

[@mikesecor6074]

My family never comes around, and only gather if there is a wedding, or death. Afterward, they disappear til the next event. I'm an introvert by nature. Maybe if i was in an Italian family? lol.

[@benjaminrush4443]

@@mikesecor6074 My Dad told me when I was an older child, you will be very lucky if you can count on one hand the number of real friends you have in your life. I didn't realize he included family. Introvertive since early life but helped many that I knew. Called "Hospitality". Found out - especially now - only you will be the one to get you out of a "Pickle". Remember the "Corny" TV Show - Highway to Heaven? Well, there are no Johnathan's & Gorden today. You get old - your alone. Even in a church. No Weddings, No Funerals ... No Invitations. Sometimes you hear about some wonderful "Acts of Kindness", and this makes me happy. So, I pray to be nice and try to not get angry of bitter. I thank God for what I have and try to be grateful. After all, I did play my part in the Saga. Oh well. Thanks.

[@lorraine9320]

@@mikesecor6074 Don't happen to be eastern European descent ? My daughter in law is Italian descent & this Saturday they are having a huge B.D. party for 90 yr old Uncle, her 75 yr old Father and her brothers 50th. How wonderful.

[@dalewilliams8001]

Can relate. I've got three or four friends who I rarely see any more. Most of the time, if I don't reach out to them, I probably won't see them. I've got enough interests to keep me busy, and more. I wouldn't go back to work, and certainly not to be around people, "friends" or otherwise. Such is life, and most often, the good life. Good video, Buzz. Stay active.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I'm a lot more outgoing than my wife and I can start a conversation with anyone. Even myself. Lol

[@sexywarriorwomen]

This is not just a retirement issue. I noticed this years ago. People are only friends by association most often and only when it is convenient for them. True friends go out of their way for each other. :)

[@mariehall9514]

I wish I could give this 1,000 likes. A most true statement!

[@petermuir]

The critical word you said there was ‘wife’. I’m 70 and my wife died a few years ago. My experience is that it’s easier to keep yourself balanced with a spouse, so if you are unintentionally single then value whatever friendship circle you have.

[@afritimm]

Yes. The worst of all is to lose a beloved spouse. Kids leave home, frequently leave town, but it is your spouse that is right there. Until they arent. As one widow said, "No one knows what I had for breakfast, and no one cares.".

[@psychiatry-is-eugenics]

5:21 near the end of the video , he said - my wife - without thinking about it

[@georgiaguy4114]

I lost my wife back in 2010 have been Lonesome ever since retired in 2017. Looking forward to the rapture

[@afritimm]

@@georgiaguy4114 I understand. God bless.

[@tomcurry556]

My wife of 40 yrs passed on me. I remarried 6 month later. Its good that i did.

[@franks6857]

I concur. Retired almost 5 years, no friends, some acquaintances from the gym. Not one person I worked with in the past 51 years of working has ever reached out to see how we're doing, and I got along with 99.9% of coworkers. Maybe they'll see me at my funeral but I'll tell them now, "If you dont want to see me when I'm alive then why in God's name do you want to see me when I'm dead?" Jus' sayin'.

[@Mrmajellan123]

You won't have to wonder. They won't be at your funeral

[@wendyfarmer3573]

We are all our gurus! Interesting honesty ! Count in one hand any friends !

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Yes. Life is strange.

[@Polyphemus47]

As one who was surrounded with real friends - people who actually loved and looked out for each other , it's a HUGE adjustment, at 76 now, to having no friends at all. Just me and my little dog, now. I do have one friend in town who checks in on me, and takes me to the grocery store, and then to lunch once a week. But. We never hang. Very little in common, interests-wise. The family's all gone. My little brother ( 3 1/2 years younger) and I were joined at the brain. We loved each other, and hung close, all our lives. Losing him was the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Retired, on a SS check that covers the rent, and a few gewgaws now and then. In the last few years, everyone I spent time yakking with has left the planet. I've always needed gig chunks of solitude, being an artist/writer, but c'MON! I've tried going to groups, and meet some nice people, but once out the door, it's over. And I don't drive, now, since I can't afford to. Boo hoo, right? But I get along, and though I went through a seemingly endless grieving process, I feel that I'm passing through it. I might even clear off the old drawing table...uh, one of these days.

[@lorraine9320]

That sounds as if it would be a great respite for you now, at this time in your life. It will help to relax your mind. Good Luck. You will find peace.

[@myggggeneration]

Do it 🙂. Best wishes!

[@alomaalber6514]

selling drawings at a craft fair or produce market would get you out with people, but I understand the not driving part.

[@Lkess1472]

These comments make me feel so much better about myself. 68 and single. Feeling abnormal because I have no friends, nor do I want to make the effort. I’m happy alone. I have a sister I see now and then and that’s all the social I need. Love being my own company.

[@scrunchie34]

Making friends is a lot of work, it's almost like dating. It's easy to make acquaintances but not friends. They are few and I am an introvert so mostly don't care. If I have some basic interaction during the week that's enough for me.

[@y7h-u8s]

my reaction is similar to yours. had no idea there were so many with the same attitude.

[@jimweatherhead7154]

Living in the UK and retired for about 8 years, now aged 71. I was so pleased to see your post Buzz as my wife and I often talk about our lack of friends and wondered if it was just us. We imagined that other people the same age were out tripping the light fantastic whilst we were sat in our own gloom and was glad to find, recently, that we were wrong. We have our own routines, hobbies and past times, we watch the news until it gets depressing, we avoid sport unless it’s of particular interest to us. Recently, speaking to a couple of retired neighbours, I realised that our lives are much the same as theirs, filled from dawn til dusk with small things, but our things. I like to tinker with woodwork, a little construction here, a little restoration there. I work in the garage with the doors open, I see the neighbours as they walk past, they always wave and say hello, some even come over to pass the time of day to see what I’m doing. It’s nice to talk with them but none are real friends. I’d be reluctant to invite any of them over for a meal, I’m sure that would be as much an imposition to them as it would be to me. They also have their ‘things’ to do, in their own bubble, it seems natural. My wife has ex-work colleagues that she goes out with whenever it’s someone’s birthday but she always comes home saying how the chat centred around the work they all once did. As we both get older it’s inevitable that one of us is going to be left alone, it’s a fact of life and we talk about it, not in morbidity but in an interesting way. We both agree that we would miss one another terribly but life would go on and we’d make the most of what we can find out there, seeking company but not necessarily friendships. Having written all this I think I can say that keeping company has more value than seeking friends. Friends are an attachment, company is detachable when required. I am happy in my own skin, long live skin 😀😀

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I appreciate you taking the time. Buzz

[@sallysmith8081]

Jim, you are very similar to me and my husband here in the US. I won't address everything you said, but will mention the "inviting someone to dinner" thing. We did not invite anyone, but our new neighbors invited us to dinner at their home. It was just the 4 of us. They turned out to be unbelievable racists and asked probing questions about our religious beliefs and our children's religious preferences. We couldn't believe how awful they were. It was horrible and awkward. My husband is a wonderful man who rarely if ever has a bad word to say about anyone, and as we walked home I said sadly, "I guess it's proper etiquette for us to invite them back for dinner." He said, "We are NEVER inviting them to our home." And that was the end of that! I'm glad we agreed on that! After working and raising 4 children, I love my life now. Just wish I was younger.

[@vester7457]

@@jimweatherhead7154 Hello, I am a lifelong single lady in Minnesota, still working, almost 66. I had to chuckle while reading the phenomenon you described, about you and your wife believing that the two of you, alone, lack a wide circle of friends. My version of that as a lifelong single lady goes like this: I'm alone with no family while my peers at this age have spouses, children, and grandchildren and therefore a social calendar fairly building with activity and commitments. I guess married or single we can all think ourselves into distorted visions of what life is like for others.

[@jimweatherhead7154]

@@sallysmith8081 Hi Sally, thanks for responding. I’ve grown comfortable in my own wrinkly skin and can usually find a calmness in responding to such probing questions with, “I’m sorry but I’m not comfortable discussing that with you at this time”. Our Royal family have a ‘get out’ for such occasions which is ‘never explain, never justify’. I think I’m becoming more regal as time passes 😀

[@agreetodisagree4751]

@@sallysmith8081 My mother used to always correct me by saying, "What will _____ think?" It took me until recently to honestly not care what rude and intrusive people think. Good on your husband.

[@TroyQwert]

I go to a swimming pool 3 days a week, meet with ppl i know for years. It's like a Club for me. I don't feel lonely alone. It is comfy to be alone. Keep yourselves busy implementing creative ideas. Keep yourself in good physical shape. And communicate with whoewer and whenever via social media.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Great advice! You're doing it right. Thanks for the comment. Buzz

[@TroyQwert]

@BuzzRetirementGarage , thank you!😺

[@stevegreen319]

It seems I am the friend when my “ friends” need something but I have found I really don’t have any friends when I need help with something. I guess that’s part of being a plumbing, heating, and A/C contractor.

[@drmwpn]

Brother, speaking as someone who has had long careers in IT and law both, believe me, in general, people's eagerness to appropriate your skills or licenses for their own benefit knows very few bounds. The ones I _really_ feel sorry for are the hairdressers, they must deal with a non-stop parade of selfish requests.

[@timcoffman8575]

I can relate to you big time being a plumber/ electrician and good mechanic I have people ask for help all the time but never ask me to just hangout or just call to say hello…. As I get close to retirement I tell no one of my skill sets which makes life easier.

[@bryanbrowning5746]

I’m pretty much in the same boat. Retired mechanic, but have the skills to do all home repairs. I only hear from people if they need “help”. In other words, “can you come do this for me”? I’ve pretty much blocked all my phone contacts with the exception of my kids.

[@keithwiebe1787]

@@bryanbrowning5746 Maybe that's my problem. I'm a retired mechanic and never really "offered" to repair someone's vehicle on the weekend or after hours. I was tired and sick of it by the weekend. I don't have anyone calling asking to do anything. Life is good.

[@williammetzo5407]

Samie same, the only time they call is when they need something?? BUTT, IF U NEED HELP, THEY R ALWAYS BUSY??? IAM A RETIRED MASTER PLUMBER, ELECTRITIAN, HVAC AND BUILT AND REMODELED OVER 300 OR MORE HOMES!!! I HAVE GREAT EQUIPTMENT AND KNOWLEDGE.. NOT. BRAGGING, BUT TURNED DOWN A JOB AT THE VOCATIONAL COLLEGE?! I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET HELP IN RETURN??? FUCK ME!@! I NO LONGER HELP ANYONE... SORRY, BUTT THATS THE WAY IT IS!!! I WONT ANSWER ANY CELL CALL, LEAVE A MESSAGE?? MAYBE ILL CALL. (JOE WALCH)... LIFE IS GETTING BETTER FOR ME...... 😢😅😊....

[@stevenp1443]

Agree!! Retired 8 years now, love the lifestyle. Not anti-social, have immediate family, etc. but “friends & acquaintances” are work….

[@kevincourtney7312]

Family dramas can be worse.

[@AmpuTeeHee]

I am SO thankful for this topic and how the comment section has helped me to feel normal 💛 (I was beginning to think I was a weirdo! 🙃😂) I have grown to LOVE alone time. I do have “activities based friends”…people I’ve seen regularly for years in classes I take, for example. Good chit chat and occasionally there is a random deep conversation. We all know a wee little bit about each other’s lives. They’re probably the people that would call the sheriff for a well-check visit if I didn’t show up for a few weeks 😜😂. But there are no as you call “super friends” (love that). No house visits, no external gatherings, and …no one to call when the 💩 hits the fan. But again, I thought it was just me. The comments have soothed me!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I'm glad this topic helped. Buzz

[@vester7457]

I've had the same reaction. It's a relief to see I'm not the only one finding it hugely difficult to find really good friends

[@TerriCarroll]

Thank you for sharing this video, it makes me feel better, because I thought something was wrong with me. I have always had lots of true friends and I knew that was a rare blessing.. I retired in my early fiftes, so I have been at it for 7 years. I moved abroad and found real friendships surprisingly difficult to cultivate. I have lived in 2 countries outside of the U.S. in the last 3 1/2 years and can call about 5 people true friends from that time period. Only one lives in my current country of residence and that is temporary. The rest I see as acquaintances and I came to accept that, which was key for me. I cherish the friends I had before I retired, they are the real ones and they are still around.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Definitely nothing wrong with you! The comments say that relationships change as we age since friends pass, move away, etc. and we find ourselves starting over. Good luck my friend. Buzz

[@gknoll1]

Absolutely none. Moved 500 miles north, haven't bothered with finding any. Perfectly happy without them.

[@bnyob3463]

If I lived in Ohio I would invite Buzz and Mrs.Buzz over for a BBQ,I enjoy your videos so much.I am so worried for my husband to retire and have no friends because the work guys are his friends and that is going to be difficult.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

As long as you're happy everything is good!

[@lifeissweet9826]

Depends on your personality. I'm OK being alone a lot of the time. My two sisters are just the same, but yet we spend a lot of time together. They're my best friends.

[@coldspring624]

UP ?

[@andysmith9601]

I'm 59 -- retired early about 8 years ago. Best decision I ever made!! I've never had much need for friends and now that I'm retired; I'm much happier without them. Every time I trusted someone and called them friend, it backfired and that individual took advantage of me. No good deed goes unpunished!! Nope, I'll stay alone -- happily!

[@patspencer1925]

Exactly! I am with you.

[@RetJetFxr]

There are probably the type of people reading these comments who would actually turn out to be a good friend to you. Just a thought.

[@sunnyd4734]

I'm looking forward to quiet time in retirement 😌 😊 😀

[@catherinemoore3098]

Oscar Wilde! So true

[@plica06]

How did you manage to retire so young?

[@glennmckinley5807]

So glad your video found me. I have questioned my lack of friends for years. Especially since I retired. I was consigned to thinking it was just me. But after seeing your video and reading dozens of the comments, I realize I am the norm. I also am "content" being by myself. For instance, I enjoy fishing...by myself. As soon as I take someone fishing, I get pressured to find fish, and have to move around a lot just to get someone hooked up with one. I become a guide and feel obligated. There is no pressure by myself. Thanks

[@SpectralightPhoto]

Hey Bob... I mean Buzz. I'm about 1.5 years away from retirement at my full-time job at a local hospital. Been working remotely since the pandemic so I don't really have much interaction with my coworkers. My wife and I get together with another couple we've known for over 40 years at least once-a-month for dinner at a local restaurant and card or board games at each other's home afterward. I have a few other acquaintances that I hope to develop into friendships when I start retirement. One of them is into photography and we actually went to the Mansfield Reformatory a couple years ago to document the home of the "Shawshank Redemption" movie. We also did some photography together along Route 66 starting in Arizona. Keep up the great work with your KZbin channel. I'm really enjoying your content and delivery style.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thanks for the comment! Buzz

[@mhammer5]

I can identify with many people here. I just turned 69 in June. I am trying to recover from the loss of my wife who passed recently on 4-7. She was one day older than me. Her birthday June 10th, mine June 11th. This is a rough time. I hope everyone else here are doing well. I worked full time from 1973 to 2-2020 and retired.

[@rebeccabsomanybooks3558]

So sorry for your loss.

[@thruthefirepubl]

Oh man that is so sad. These are lyrics to a song I wrote titled Hope Holds On When a storm has blown in from the deep And you’re tossed among the waves When dreams are dashed upon the rocks And you're driven to despair Sorrow which is never spoken Is the heaviest load to bear But hope holds on Thru the gray to greet the dawn Hope holds on Thru the day until twilight that surrenders to the night Hope holds on Against all hope hope believes As your heart is taken to its knees Against all hope hope believes As your heart is taken to its knees We need no other thing To build the stairs out of the unfulfilled Hope believes

[@mhammer5]

@@rebeccabsomanybooks3558 Thank you.

[@mhammer5]

@@thruthefirepubl Thank you for responding.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

I'm truly sorry to read of the loss of your wife, partner and friend. I hope that you keep looking forward every day. Losing my daughter in 2020 was devastating but we had to move forward. She'll be in your minds eye forever. Buzz

[@patriciawolf9120]

No friends for about 17 years now and doing better than ever in my life. No drama, No faky people, No nosy people etc... Just in solitutue and prayer. The best!

[@veronica_._._._]

Hermit is on my wish list haha

[@alomaalber6514]

thanks for your comment I was thinking last night if I had fewer great treasures I do live like I am in a nunnery! Cheers!

[@ericweredyk4142]

My uncle, Vietnam Vet, told me 35+ years ago that if you have 1 or 2 good friends in your life you'd be very lucky. He further elaborated that a true friend would be somebody that would wipe your ass if both your arms were broken.

[@cookingprincess327]

Good one!

[@aussiejubes]

I'm that friend to everybody & nobody is that friend to me. The focus in the comments here is to be sure you know who your friends are. My lesson in life is to not be a friend to everybody. Nobody considers me their friend lol.

[@trinity7776]

@@aussiejubes your generous nature is probably not appreciated it is the same with me.

[@aussiejubes]

@@trinity7776 it's not appreciated, but it's also a good lesson for me to gather evidence that someone deserves my efforts before just giving them willy nilly.

[@williamthomas1889]

that sounds like a good spouse

[@sundog3150]

76 here and a lifetime homemaker. Best friend is my husband. Very few people have true friends. I have people I see once a month that at book club. My husband has friends he plays golf with and tennis. He hosts a ping pong party once a month where those guys come over and just talk. Very little ping pong played. My only true friend of 30 years is going a different path so I see her less and less. I hosted art workshops in my home studio for 10 years every Friday. I thought those seven women were my friends but when I finally said that the workshops were a lot of work and I wanted to do something different they all just disappeared. Nobody called to go have a cup of coffee, nothing. So even though we talked about everything for four hours every Friday for 10 years when it stopped so did the “friendships” that was an eye opener for me. I work on being pleasant and kind every day to everyone I meet. I try not to be invisible. I volunteer at the local high school in the library, doing mundane things but being around the energy of young adults. But mostly I live for my animals and nature in my yard.

[@MarkPuertolas]

The word Friend is as special as the word Love. It does not happen alot.

[@TheChinaDan]

Retired 5 years ago. I have no friends, and it's OK. Was never a very social guy, being home was always what I enjoyed most. I worked as a property/ landscape manager for 45 years. Lots of crew and client interactions daily, everyone wanted a piece of me, 200 decisions a day, always trying to thread the needle of getting the work done and keeping everyone happy. Retirement happened rather quickly and with only a few days notice. A combo of Covid and a terminated government contract ushered me into retirement at 65. I longed for retirement for years, I wanted to step away from all of it. Haven't been disappointed. No worry no stress, it's great. And except for my wife and kids no real contact with the "real world" anymore. Embrace each chapter of life. The retirement chapter is the sweetest yet.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Thank you for writing your experience. I appreciate you. Buzz

[@Nori_G]

Actually, I think you are living in the “ real world” now!😊

[@routex1]

I enjoy my solitude and even thrive in it. It feels like an effort to be around people for an extended period of time.

[@gphilipc2031]

I have to "behave" around Friends and Family, that's getin' harder to do.

[@marymartinez1672]

routex.....I feel the same way !!

[@davery07]

Thank you for this. Been retired for almost 5 years, been divorced for many more and have found the lack of friendships difficult to process. Had all kinds of "work friends" but that dissipated quickly after retirement. Lately however I'm learning to be ok being alone. I'm doing the things I enjoy and learning new things as well. It's a journey and your message resonated with me a lot. :)

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

If you read through the comments, you'll find we are not alone! Best wishes to you my friend! Buzz

[@davery07]

@@BuzzRetirementGarage Thank you. That's exactly what I did. :)

[@wrylife57]

I'm a 66 yo single woman with no friends or family near me anymore. I connect regularly with family via phone and video chat and that is exactly as much social interaction as I need or want. In fact, if I speak with my siblings or children several days in a row I need to recover from it. As you may have guessed, I am a true introvert. In all the years I worked I had some friends, a few I considered close, but over time we grew apart and I have no contact with any of them now. I do not miss people, at all. I have a little dog, a great companion but, even if I didn't, I would be fine alone. I have never been lonely in my life.

[@kezzatries]

I chuckled, that's me! But a bloke 😂

[@DogBeast221]

Woof!

[@waterst9]

I retired this past December and have found and confirmed other retired friend's impressions that you must be disciplined in the use of your free time and approach it as a " job " in that it is easy to fall into a lethargic pattern of inactivity. I worked for a government agency as a infrastructure project manager and have found that a significant number of those that retired from my discipline wound up with a premium cable package and a metaphorical pallet of Twinkies from Costco and the inevitable consequences entailed with that lifestyle. That doesn't mean you have to rise at dawn and build that addition on to your house - it means set some tasks to complete that day in addition to physical activities such as cycling, running, hiking, etc. Mix it up so it doesn't become like an actual job and make a point to engage your real friends in those activities and meet for dinner or casual coffee.

[@dburton7929]

Been retired six years, and my social life is with my wonderful wife, my dog, chickens, honey bees and our farm. I’ve never been happier.

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Love it!

[@oscarrlee18]

Way to go

[@iainfalconer4674]

Enjoy it while it lasts. You never know when your flight’s going to be called . . .

[@rosaoddin4338]

So fortunate to have your life partner, spouse - that is so precious

[@lorraine9320]

Hey, you have my dream retirement. Happy for you. I grew up on small family farm. Love animals, sitting together on front porch on a Sunday relaxing as my parents did, so said too the man I wanted to marry. Nope, didn't happen, divorced after 35 yrs. Tried hard. He didn't. He went golfing every Sunday then played cards. Never even petted one of my many dogs. Chickens, hah!

[@patrickbrade1992]

We live in an indifferent universe devoid of meaning and 50ish years after death nobody will ever know you existed. So what is it all about? Be happy, enjoy life's fleeting moments and don't worry about friends. Sure, share time with like minded people and care about each other but take it as it comes. Keep perspective!

[@BuzzRetirementGarage]

Egsetential answer. Agreed!