No, Kamala Harris Is Not Headed To The Supreme Court | Ron Johnson Gets Tough On America's Babies

Fox News is way off the mark with their "credible" speculation that VP Harris will be President Biden's nominee for the Supreme Court, and Stephen has a song for Senator Ron Johnson who thinks society has no duty to take care of children. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via Paramount+, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

[@Dezhavu13]

So, let's get this straight. Ron Johnson believes that people should think about the consequences when deciding to have children, but legislates against a woman's right to choose, including those who are pregnant due to rape or incest. Can we please send him back to the alternate reality he came from?

[@anaccount9929]

Preach, Baby.🍻

[@gamepapa1211]

A trustfund baby with a silver spoon in his mouth like Ron Johnson would never understand the plight of the common folks.

[@flammungous3068]

Not to mention that in order to a society to run successfully people need to have children. If you would follow Ron Johnsons logic then people might not have children which in turn, in due time, will make society collapse.

[@camfranson1194]

Overwhelming majority of abortions are due to just not wanting the child. Which is murder. But hey, to each their own right? Let’s turn a blind eye to infanticide.

[@thesoundsmith]

You have the right to the arms of a bear.🐻

[@nomore6167]

Ron Johnson: "I've never really felt it was society's responsibility to take care of other people's children". - That explains the GOP's anti-education position since schools exist explicitly to educate other people's children.

[@shotjohnny]

WE, the people, need to push for term limits for all judges & politicians. And age limits. Someone in their 80s should not decide the future of the younger generation.

[@vanessalopez4664]

The “Greatest Love of All” remake was awesome Stephen. Thank you!

[@Leonaza7]

Could someone please whisper in Tucker’s ear that Biden is seriously considering nominating Michelle Obama. (I have no knowledge that this is true) but I would love to watch his response.

[@victorarredondo304]

The fact of kamala harris being considered is insane. I remember all of yall attacking Trump's justices. And for what????? For you're own ignorance colbert fans.

[@IAmJustR]

they just can't think of another Black woman is all lol

[@reneedennis6826]

It would be a great time for Michelle to visit her good friend Jill.

[@RabblesTheBinx]

@@victorarredondo304 Kamala Harris isn't going to be nominated to the Supreme Court. Her role as VP is too important. And let's see, Trump's appointments... a right-wing loon that shouldn't have been even considered and took a _stolen_ seat on the court, a rapist, and a fundamentalist zealot who believes that the U.S. should be a theocracy. Yeah, _those_ criticisms are valid and the fact that you don't think they are shows how dangerously disturbed and straight-up sociopathic you Republicans are.

[@benjaminmadrigalperez9010]

@@victorarredondo304 The title is literally "NO KAMALA HARRIS IS NOT HEADED FOR THE SUPREME COURT". Oh My god, read please.

[@Rosarium2007]

I can think of the perfect female African American nominee for the Supreme Court, law professor Dr. Anita Faye Hill. She probably wouldn't accept, but it sure would mess with Justice Thomas.

[@asmith8692]

Another perfect lady Justice would be Michelle Obama.

[@KristiContemplates]

😱 that is a mortifying idea!!! I love it!!! Dr Hill is a person of integrity and courage to have stood up for women and herself under intense immense pressure and scrutiny. Dr Hill's were the actions of true heroic sacrifice to ensure the safety of others. She is awesome 👍🏿

[@MayTheSchwartzBeWithYou]

Too old.

[@MrNukedawhales]

she wouldnt be perfect... because she is 65. the reps stacked the court with "young" judges, because they will stick around for decades to come, which in their mind is more important than sex or race of a judge.. and i have to agree.

[@gregeoryl]

Sweet thought.

[@minski76]

As the saying goes: It takes a village of Republicans to cast out the children of the weakest villagers.

[@CatherinePearl100]

That made me laugh out loud. I think it deserves a lot more thumbs up than it got

[@bobbobbington3615]

Vs Democrats who's cities/districts are the most violent.

[@Sarah-yj6lf]

(*Sigh*) Stop blaming Republicans and confusing them with the Trumptards. They left their political party and helped us get rid of Trump. What more do you want??

[@Alresu]

@@Sarah-yj6lf That you get rid of people like Johnson, McConnel, Greene, Gaetz, etc.?

[@pld4444]

Brilliant as usual Steve. THANK YOU (You all) for keeping us sane with laughs, we love you Steve-&-Evie, and kidlets. \

[@carissahowell]

"F**k them kids!" - Senator Ron Johnson and the rest of the GOP aka "Party of Family Values"

[@eternaldarkness3139]

You sure that's not a Matt Gaetz quote??!!

[@atiredfloridian777]

"A president is not a king and the plaintiff is not the president." Powerful words. Powerful ones.

[@hareeshkrishnaa5642]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/a3PXiq2npKtjbKs

[@Surge1077]

That was my absolute favorite quote of 2021.

[@raptango_na6199]

no one cares

[@MonkeyJedi99]

@@raptango_na6199 You are wrong. I care. And as I am someone, I alone am necessary to invalidate your "no one".

[@raptango_na6199]

@@MonkeyJedi99 these quips are meaningless. Fiona Hill made some similar meaningless phrase about Barron Trump. Its all hyperpartisan garbage. So according to you, someone cares. Why? Who knows.

[@longlivedemocracy756]

Stephen, you and your writers are crushing it every night! Thank you all for helping keep me (mostly) sane!🤣😂😭

[@cynthiaszirmai1900]

Stephen Colbert, you always deliver the biggest laughs!

[@tigerspirit1917]

Watch Mitch McConnell say its unconstitutional to appoint a judge so close to an election.

[@thomasd4738]

Rience Priebus, Ron Johnson, Scott Walker, Paul Ryan, and of course "Tailgunner Joe" McCarthy. Seriously Wisconsin, what the hell?

[@arrgorndenethor]

WI is really red outside of a few cities and Koch money is behind them

[@Jabberkong]

I'm going to be humming "I believe the children are a burden" for a while. Thanks Steve.

[@bunnyluvlee661]

It will never cease to blow my mind that the people saying they shouldn't have to take care of children are the same people who say unborn fetuses are precious and need to be protected at all costs. But not when they come out of the womb though. Then you're on your own. No handouts!

[@nanszoo3092]

THIS is exactly why they are losing voters... the hypocrisy of the GOP on this point and so many others, in my view, is why I and so many other swing voters cannot support their candidates. They continually try to *both sides* so many issues and reject any reasonable solutions to the point where we are stagnating /or losing ground every day. Instead of helping the country move forward to a more perfect union, the goal seems to be regression to a time that never was and never can be. Where it leads will be determined in the next decade. There is no guarantee that this cabal of intentional ineptitude will not cause the demise of our nation. But those of us who are paying attention have rejected their message and THAT is why so-called red states (which are really purple) went blue in 2020 and why so many others were closer than their legislators liked.

[@bigverybadtom]

@@nanszoo3092 You make the mess, you clean it up. Del.

[@nanszoo3092]

@@bigverybadtom To which mess are you referring?

[@bigverybadtom]

@@nanszoo3092 The case of "you do something foolish, you deal with the consequences." BTW, rumor has it that the people who get teens pregnant are NOT other teens, but older adults.

[@nanszoo3092]

​@@bigverybadtom so is your point is that even if a teen/minor/child makes a mistake, even if an adult is an instigator and/or participant in the mistake, the onus is on the minor/child/teen (and their family if they are lucky enough to have that support) to carry the burden for the rest of her life while society and the adults who are charged with protecting said minor child (according to the implicit social contract of civilization) have no responsibility at all? But this same person (and their family) also has no right to make a choice in her favor until 9 months after the original so-called foolish choice? Because the original comment was about the hypocrisy of not allowing a choice to a person and then claiming no responsibility to alleviate any of the burdens incurred by the lack of choice or by making a choice that would actually align with so-called GOP values. My opinion is that if you want to stop abortion, then stop making it so difficult for people to support themselves and their children. I don't like abortion, but I don't think I have any right to tell anyone else they can't choose or even consider that path for themselves. I have seen too many neglected, abandoned, orphaned, and abused children. to say you are protecting unborn children and then claim no need to protect born children IMO is hypocrisy.

[@Chipotleadvisory]

Ron Johnson “ I don’t think it’s society responsibility to raise people’s children.” Also Ron Johnson “I think women should be forced by the government to carry unwanted pregnancies to term.”

[@hotrodrope1]

If your dumb enough to let someone else raise your kid you shouldn't have any

[@oldbat2ccats]

Right you are s Olson !

[@hotrodrope1]

Right on

[@chrissiek8706]

@@hotrodrope1 try telling that to Texas legislators

[@hotrodrope1]

@@chrissiek8706 I'm from Texas what's the problem

[@handleBadpuppy]

Johnson's idea is don't give the money to children give it to millionaires, they clearly need it more 🙄😳🤨

[@ferox965]

Hammer, meet nail. Spot on.

[@BobPagani]

Have you ever seen what babies do when you hand them a dollar bill? Straight into their mouth! Disgusting.

[@ldbarthel]

And then the millionaires, in their infinite wisdom, can decide which children they will support with their tax-deductible charitable donations. I think I've spotted the supply-chain bottleneck....

[@elenachristian9860]

Well how else will the United States know the greatness of sending dick rockets 🚀 into space?

[@GigiTupas]

LOL! Love your brand of intelligent humor and showmanship, Stephen! Thank youuuu! 😀

[@lexas1]

Ron Johnson, such a great ambassador for what the Republican party doesn't care about.

[@OfNoImport]

Out of one side of their face - "Lol, your kids, your problem." Out of the other - "WHY AREN'T PEOPLE HAVING MORE KIDS?!" I only recently learned what the term 'Disingenuous' means, but this is definitely that.

[@amcmartin]

Ron Johnson is the worst thing to happen to America's children since Matt Gaetz

[@mypillowguy445]

Hey, at least Gaetz has no problem paying for other people's children.

[@darrmad3593]

At least hes not sniffing them and having them rub the hair on his legs. LETS GO BRANDON.

[@PitoCardona]

If you see Gaetz near a playground with skittles Ron Jonson is right up the road in the windowless getaway van.

[@grmpEqweer]

@@darrmad3593 You haven't grown up yet. Like Matt's hookups.

[@RabblesTheBinx]

@@darrmad3593 lol, so which one are you defending with the tired (and massively hypocritical, considering you support a literal serial rapist with over 2 dozen credible accusations against him) "Biden is creepy" bit, the kiddie diddler or the one who wants them to starve?

[@kathya1321]

Thank you Stephan Colbert!! Expat in France here loving every minute ❤️❤️❤️🙏🏼

[@singerrb4984]

Is that Steven's actual voice??? If so, it is beautiful! Song was beautifully sung - I want to hear more!!!

[@starshake8998]

So Ron Johnson attests that having children/starting a family is a "CHOICE", huh? Interesting...

[@jasonarthurs3885]

Thank you! This comment needs serious upvoting.

[@petunialuna4801]

Great. Short and pointed! Headline stuff!

[@BobPagani]

Brilliant comment.

[@WindFireAllThatKindOfThing]

Well, when he goes to prison, lets hope someone gets him pregnant. He could use the change in perspective. Statistical fact: 9 out of 10 inmates approve of consentually challenged group sex.

[@raptango_na6199]

When did it not become a choice?

[@gamepapa1211]

Aww Stephen left out where Judge Jackson said "...and (the) Plaintiff is not President." That was the best part of the slam!

[@chezmoi42]

I think that part was spoken by Judge Tanya Chutkan (another fine black jurist) a couple of weeks earlier, as she refused to stop the release of T's documents to the Select Committee: “Presidents are not kings, and Plaintiff is not President." Judge Jackson later echoed that opinion in response to T's claim of immunity for former WH Counsel Don McGahn.

[@gamepapa1211]

@@chezmoi42 ah ok. Thank you for setting the facts straight. Most folks gets angry these days for being corrected, but don't worry: they're all supporters of the Orange Baboon and easy to identify.

[@chezmoi42]

@@gamepapa1211 I only remember that because I follow Glenn Kirschner's channel, and he frequently gives her (well-deserved) credit for it. I actually had to go look it up, to see who got there firstest with the mostest. Judge Jackson is a super-qualified candidate, but Judge Chutkan is doing fine work on these cases, too. 💙

[@tradrudeboy]

As one of Ron Johnson's constituents, he can go straight to hell. I don't have kids, and I speak to my local officials regularly about supporting kids; I actively lobby for increases in taxes to support free breakfast and lunch throughout the year for all kids.

[@olaoluwabode-omoleye356]

This was an amazing monologue 😂. I lost it at the French interlude and Ron Johnson campaign song is freaking amazing 😂

[@marisolaquino719]

R.Johnson speaks like someone who has never had to worry about how to make a dollar stretch for bills, groceries, etc. He’s the reason why the QGOP should be voted out of office. What a stain on humanity.

[@gamepapa1211]

"The multiverse contains an infinite number of possibilities, but in all of them, you are an idiot" is now my favorite new takedown. God bless you, Stephens! Both Strange and Colbert!

[@J.5.M.]

That was an epic diss

[@ellevonk.2925]

Hahaha, GOLD!

[@shantoreywilkins651]

🤣😂😹

[@shantoreywilkins651]

@@ellevonk.2925 🥇🥇🥇🥇

[@EduardMoraru]

How to get Benedict Cumberbatch to make a video saying this ?

[@Katelyn3666]

Love when stephen gets a chance to sing! Thank you to the writers for that.

[@shenanikenz]

I love Stephen. That French film bit was just… *chefs kiss*

[@RosieRoserules]

Senator Ron Johnson, you're missing the point that he's a republican who is demanding that everyone that finds herself accidentally pregnant , has to have the child. How can he be saying people decide to have a baby at the same time as he doesn't want to take care of other people's children but he wants to take care of other people's fetuses

[@dgrant7291]

A Republican blames EVERY social problem on itself.....until THEY have that problem, and then they expect yours and my compassion and help and understanding etc. Typical bigoted narcissistic blindness....imo lol

[@richardjones2455]

I guess you could say that Republicans are hypocrites.

[@brandonm949]

My theory is that Republicans like the idea of people, but they don't like actual people. Fetuses are the best of both worlds - all of the human potential without needing any of the resources Republicans want to hoard.

[@ShadowWolf1307]

@@brandonm949 that... actually sounds surprisingly right

[@kylestubbs8867]

By banking on the short-term memory and double-standard acceptance among their viewers. That’s how.

[@Mason051]

Once again emphasizes the whole, “no you’re not allowed to get an abortion, but the second that baby comes out F you you’re on your own” right mentality

[@UncleMilo]

Republicans calim to be pro-life, but they don't seem to like anything more than dead Americans. They deny climate sciece. They deny Americans affordable health care. They deny a living wage. They block policies that would prevent companies poisoning our water, our air and our land. They are against any restrictions on guns, but will block measures that help children leading one to believe they care more about guns than children. They want to force women to have children even if it endangers their lives. They deny the truth about CoVid and support lies about the science. They were fine putting our soldiers into an unplanned and uneding war zone while singing the praises of Trump when he called our soldiers suckers. If you love seeing Americans die, vote Republcian.

[@camfranson1194]

@@UncleMilo holy radicalized generalizations of a segment of the American population.

[@bigverybadtom]

@@UncleMilo Nice revisionist history. It wasn't Trump who bombed Libya and created ISIS.

[@juliaeddy2639]

Be gone Please?!!!

[@sherridriessen3137]

Hilarious. Love watching him before I go to bed with a smile on my face

[@darrenmitchell2830]

Respect to Stephen! He can do it all, quote Shakespeare, act, interview obviously but also sing. My most favorite show i watch, bar none!!!!

[@time2livelife]

People who even think a sitting VP would be elected to the SC clearly don’t understand how anything works.

[@Tonyhouse1168]

You literally just defined everyone on fox ewwwws

[@gamepapa1211]

That's like the job description for FOX News anchors.

[@MichelleDenise64]

Knowing how the government operates isn't a priority for those folks. Sigh

[@jacqdanieles]

I know how to keep Trump out of office. Nominate him to the Supreme Court!

[@jaybuck5818]

If she was green, candy coated and in sexy boots you can bet that color wouldn't be a problem for them!

[@TheIronSavior]

Taking care of someone else's kid. That right there. That actually just might be what Jesus would do.

[@la_belle_heaulmiere]

It is something that Joseph actually did, too, for Jesus

[@TexanWineAunt]

Colbert works so hard for the money. Real jokes, celebrity impressions, even singing satirical songs himself. Best quality late night host. A plus to the Colbert show.

[@papatroll9545]

You MUST do more of these, Stephen! You've got a Ferrari of a band in the house and the best writers; go grab that Grammy!

[@davidanderson_surrey_bc]

Here in Canada, I remember as a child in the sixties hearing my mom say from time to time how thankful she was to receive monthly child subsidies. The amounts were small, but they paid for our shoes and clothing. There's a big big difference between children who grow up with enough food and clothing to keep them fed and warm; and those who grow up without. Governments, and society at large, reap multiple returns for such an investment.

[@alaric_]

Government is literally formed to take care of it's citizens, by collecting taxes and keeping them safe from hunger and war. After fighting and scraping things to together for millenias to achieve a point where poor can be helped and children kept fed without any problem, there comes a man who thinks the 'cave times were better'.... (Puts on aviators) Come on, Jack! What the hell is wrong with you!

[@eternaldarkness3139]

Damn Socialists!!! "I want food... I want clothing... I want shelter... I want healthcare..." they whine. America: " Ask NOT what your country can do for you. Ask how much multi-national corporations can fleece you for, whilst they benefit from tax havens and corporate welfare" Sorry...

[@CrumblyTriscuits]

Also, here in Canada I heard on cbc radio the other day that we aren't having enough children to support the economy for the future, that's why we need immigration to ramp up. Yet some people have a problem with that too.... Beam me up Scotty, I'm ready to go home!

[@topherman420]

Grew up in Canada as well. Born in 1983.....we had a thing my mom called 'baby bonus', which also was realatively small, like up to 80.00 i think. It was a good gap filler and helped with groceries, school supplies (or fees for field trips and things) and clothes. Growing up really poor, that baby bonus sometimes was the difference between eating or not eating.

[@cortezyvonne]

@@CrumblyTriscuits i saw something similar here in the US but it was about not having enough people to fill job positions due to major resignations across the country. That immigrants would solve that issue but immigrants are scared to work and immigration declined drastically since they have been made out to be the enemy☕️☕️☕️

[@revmark715]

Anita Hill should be the first black female Supreme Court Justice. Intelligent Character integrity and would piss off Justice Thomas.

[@petunialuna4801]

Now that's funny. It would be great to see Thomas's face, and his right wingnut wife's face as well.

[@stefanhoimes]

It would be such a symbolic act of humility from Biden to right such a cruel wrong.

[@KristiContemplates]

Hey, maybe he'll retire in protest, and then, oh lookie!, another opening 👍🏿🤓

[@MrNukedawhales]

yeah, trolling thomas is so much more important than anything else - e.g. her age (65). the republicans stacked the court with young judges, because they will be there for the next decades... and the left only cares about the sex and race of the next judge.. genius! lets go back to the golden 60s where all the mattered was you sex(ual orientation) and your race - and dont forget to call the other side of the aisle racists and sexists, of course.

[@jbond7]

I like the idea, but at 65 she's about 15-years older than recent Trump appointees.

[@Dobviews]

As a 44 year old female who refused to have children it has been my duty to pay taxes for public education for children of this country. I have never begrudged a penny for our children's well-being. It is my duty as a citizen.

[@joseespinoza7289]

His song made me laugh so much I cried😂Had to watch it a few more times…Beats Sexual Chocolate’s rendition of it as my new favorite cover/parody of this song. Great Job Steven! You always start my mornings with a laugh.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@graceroxybg2956]

What’s the song

[@kmk403]

🎼"I believe the children are a burden"🕯😅🤣

[@Opus313]

No matter who Joe picks for the court, they will be infinitely better than the last three...

[@coffeeNTrees]

@@eca3211 kaywhyes

[@victorarredondo304]

You'll rather have a lunatic justice??

[@grantsmythe8625]

Absolutely.

[@glockout8283]

Cardi B for JUSTICE!!!!!

[@jakeherter]

@@victorarredondo304 huh?

[@ChicagoBeaver]

Gotta admit, this guy nailed this monologue. He's having fun and people love it.

[@eliasadam2345]

He's so amazing. I just can't believe how we are so gifted and so lucky to have a personality so wise, smart, calm, and most importantly... hilariously, and yet so funny in times of trouble. I'm going to wear my Ray Bans tomorrow also in solidarity with Colbert and Biden. Two of the smartest people walking the Earth right now. May Putin drop dead from either of their icy stares and realize WW3 can be averted by comedy and clapping when one needs to! Salud!

[@kenna163]

He clearly loves what he does. It shows

[@hareeshkrishnaa5642]

Making a monologue, very entertaining

[@myrahj1482]

This was a great monolog Stephen! 🎶 🎤 👍🏼🤣💕

[@dr.tetraminflakes3187]

"I never feel it's society's responsivity to take care of other people's children".....but society have to make rule for the 1% so they don't have to paid taxes and rest of us do?

[@roni6215]

And corporations are people !

[@elenachristian9860]

@@steviesteveo1 Do you remember about 10, 15 years ago when Gingrich suggested we bring back child labor and the GOP collectively orgasmed?

[@raptango_na6199]

The top 1% of households in this country pay 20% of federal taxes. The top 50% pay all of the federal taxes.

[@blakebrown534]

This isn't a logical argument. Yeah, rich people get away with murder w/ their taxes and the entire system built to coddle them, but this 'argument' is garbage.

[@AndiDuck]

I really like that "Presidents are not Kings" Judge !!

[@lynnhettrick7588]

Same! She seems like a great choice!

[@christianmanriquez7022]

This Ron Johnson skit was legendary!

[@goodmorninggilw2836]

Thank you very much Stephen Colbert. You are a beautiful brother

[@tans430]

So, Mr Johnson, you also oppose taking children away from abusive families then, or taking care of orphans or abandoned children then? All if these categories are taken care of by the 'state'!

[@matthewmuir8884]

Has Ron Johnson never heard the saying, "It takes a village to raise a child"?

[@ferox965]

No. Ron Johnson would probably turn that village into a parking lot.

[@KristiContemplates]

He has, and then heard it was from the continent of Africa, which is why he's against the notion LoL

[@chantalfinn6173]

The party of family values 🙄🤦

[@willwilhoit1119]

Laughed so hard. Very informative too.

[@richardashton7406]

I credit Johnson with speaking the honest truth about true republican family values; Johnson honestly effectively says, “screw ‘em, they’re on there own; not my problem.” And there you have it.

[@dracoargentum9783]

It is Republican Family Values until SOMEONE from the Party make an effort to actually change them.

[@auntiepha8343]

Daily Reminder: "A president is not a king and the plaintiff is not the president." - 11/09/2021 D.C. District Court Judge Tanya Chutkan

[@MsPrincesspaulina]

That statement is a quick way of getting your name on the short list.

[@jasonarthurs3885]

@@MsPrincesspaulina Also looks great on a T-shirt.

[@lenusniq_9746]

"When people decide to have children they need to consider...." I love how he puts so much emphasis on DECIDE... it probably means free will is really important to him... UNLESS it is desperate woman in Texas or another backwards state which says: Yeah, nope, no decision for you. You are having this baby!"

[@raptango_na6199]

But that not what hes talking about. Hes talking about the Lefts wishlist to take money from families and give it to single mothers. Its policies like these that have driven the single motherhood rate in the black community to over 70% already. And then the left wants to blame racism for poverty and inequity when the true cause is single income families and their own awful policies.

[@shellibelli4387]

I’m sure Ron’s Johnson always had a condom on it when he was with a lady.

[@normaforsyth7950]

The most horrifying part to that Texas law is there's a FOUR YEAR statute of limitations for suing someone over it!!! (Just read it.) Nightmare scenarios coming: Man and woman decide on an abortion together (or he forces her into one.) Three years later, woman is sick of the man's drug habit or drinking or abuse (whatever) and she wants a divorce. Spiteful husband (or addict or abuser) sues her for the abortion claiming he didn't know until now or that he tried to make her stop but she refused. Now he claims emotional damage. She winds up paying him 10k. Or he can refuse to pay child support on any kids they DO have under threat of suing her for that early abortion. There are many other of these type scenarios. Texas made it open season on women in SO many more ways than "just" abortion. I can't even imagine how haywire this is going to go. This is what happens when uneducated or unintelligent hayseeds get to make the rules. They cannot think things through.

[@C3yl0]

Not only that. Life cannot be predicted and planned accordingly. For example, you can be financially secure today and get pregnant and tomorrow suffer an accident, your husband leave you cause doesn’t want to deal with the stress, and pretty much the woman end up needing extended care. Who will provide for all the needs for that child and that woman? The government? Yes, there is child support but don’t expect that it will cover all the expenses. Therefore, forcing someone to have a child it is an abuse.

[@chrissiek8706]

@@normaforsyth7950 not American here, but could you explain one thing in that possible scenario: how a suing man could show a proof of abortion fact, if woman's medical records are private? Or she gone to some other than usual clinic, paid cash and haven't told them real name? Or in such case woman's rights to keep her medical records sealed would not be applicable? To break such thing would set a precedent to open up a lot of medical records in any other case to public, you think them old cronies thought about that? There could be some written evidence, like messages etc, but one can say those were fabricated, and what existing law could make a woman get a medical examination? Now, that would be some handmaid's tale like nightmare... Guys, I think you're heading towards some evangelical taliban rule...

[@elvia3068]

😂😂😂 hell yeah!! Stephen you go!! That song was awesome it made me laugh so much.....🤩

[@jamieanderson1866]

Theres a guy in the audience with a super loud and distinct laugh and I'm living for it

[@ChainReactionsProductions]

A little funny that Candace Owens is outraged by Minnie Mouse wearing a pantsuit considering it makes up her entire wardrobe

[@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494]

She's just jealous that it was custom-designed for Minnie by Stella McCartney. She could never get that.

[@blueowlwill8754]

Seriously, put a Native American on the Supreme Court, that would be awesome and look less corrupt like. I am all for putting anyone on Supreme Court that could do their job, not be political! Politics is bad medicine, and unhealthy for society as a whole.

[@dgrant7291]

at this point a half Black half Native American gay female would be a dream candidate, amiright?

[@time2livelife]

That would be wonderful

[@MrNukedawhales]

@@time2livelife yes, because race and sex(ual orientation) is more important than qualification and experience... just like in the golden 60s, am i right?

[@lisab9541]

@@MrNukedawhales they mean only if the person is also highly qualified.

[@MrNukedawhales]

@@lisab9541 the republicans stacked the court intelligently. their criterias are: YOUNG (will stick around for decades), right-wing views ... and maybe even qualified. THESE are the objectively important criterias. biden promised to stack the court with a black woman, because thats whats most important to the left - he didnt promise to find the "most qualified" or the "most progressive" etc. this isnt just stupid, but racist and sexist too. im not a fan of the republicans, but the are playing the political game so much better than the "well-meaning" lefties AND they dont care about race or sex, as long as you deliver them the desired results.

[@smorris7713]

Bless Stephen 🤣 he's just too awesome.

[@zeuswill9523]

DAMMIT! Please give Colbert's writers a RAISE! THEY HAVE BEEN ON IT!

[@parslowpongbert1566]

Senators should learn to stand on their own two feet, don’t send Johnson donations/handouts.

[@vbranco6726]

Such Talent!!!!! Thank you Steven, so good to laugh!!! 🤣😂 Great singing too! 💗

[@jakemoeller7850]

Brilliant monologue, Stephen! 🤣😂

[@Fifthelement203]

Stephen bodied this monologue 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@andrewmiller8622]

As not only an American but also a Wisconsinite I'm sooo ashamed of Ron Johnson. The guy is a joke. I really hope we can vote him out this year!

[@richardjones2455]

Even many conservatives in Wisconsin are embarrassed about the existence of Johnson.

[@sprig5173]

Being against children has never been a great political move

[@ms.reonalove9408]

@@richardjones2455 How do these guys get voted back in... I know y'all have other choices for preference right? SMH. Do you?

[@dafttool]

The rest of America is hoping you can vote him out too. Let’s make Maserati Manchin irrelevant

[@dafttool]

@@richardjones2455 Putin loves him. Even invites him over to the Kremlin to celebrate the 4th of July

[@gamepapa1211]

African Proverb: "It takes a village to raise a child." Ron Johnson: "Lol no."

[@dgrant7291]

Ron Johnson :"No, it takes a trust fund...., with deferred annuities...everyone knows that!"

[@KristiContemplates]

This comment might explain why he's so against the idea

[@gamepapa1211]

@@KristiContemplates indeed, because I have a sinking feeling Ron wants to be buried with his worldly possessions like Pharaohs of old.

[@antielfimationleague231]

Nobody in this village wants to raise your child.

[@gamepapa1211]

@@antielfimationleague231 not true. Ask your mom.

[@cynthiakozikowski1765]

I love Stephen Colbert. He has kept us all sane during these insane times.

[@thomasjohn6041]

🤣🤣. You don’t speak for all of us. Stevie boy is nothing but a Hollywood libshyt who has an obsession with orange man, yet turns his head on the horrible BRANDON administration. Typical Hollywood.

[@eliasadam2345]

Absolutely. I had trouble knowing when to clap when appropriately, but Steve Colbert's amazing monologues helped straightened me out! (No pun intended)

[@gamepapa1211]

@@thomasjohn6041 look at the video's Like count. Now look at yours. Now look at the subscribers count. Now look at yours. Now look at the "EXIT" sign.

[@thomasjohn6041]

@@gamepapa1211 uh, y a w n.

[@Lulu-ue2lj]

You are golden Stephen 😂

[@davidanderson_surrey_bc]

Oh yes, God forbid that a 93-year-old female should decide it's more appropriate to wear a pantsuit than a short skirt. 'Cause, ya know, that's how old Minnie Mouse is.

[@wileyschmitt]

I hope they select Jackson just so that I can sing... "I'm sorry Judge Jackson. Ooooooooh! I will appeeeeal."

[@ERoserie]

Youre awesome for that one.

[@RabblesTheBinx]

Nah, you have to do it before she gets to the SCOTUS. Because she'll no longer be Judge Jackson, but Justice Jackson.

[@jasonarthurs3885]

@@RabblesTheBinx Lyrics can be upgraded too, not just SCOTUS.

[@OzInglorious]

🙌

[@KristiContemplates]

That's the song playing on the radio when baby #2 was born 🥰

[@nanettesnowden6513]

That song was fab! Thanks, as always Mr Colbert ❤️🇨🇦

[@imatugwaddle2291]

I would much rather tax money be spent on our own poor instead of these endless, Wall Stteet-based FOREIGN WARS!!!

[@camelsh-t_on_the_walls446]

To be a complete and selfish *mega jerk* in every way possible, *THAT* folks, is the required trait to be an exemplary GQP.

[@MicheleEngel]

And then there’s the irony of Ron Johnson’s opinion that women have no reproductive rights when it comes to choosing not to bring a child she would not be able to financially support into the world. Where, pray tell, does this place exist where every single child who is born was intentionally wanted and planned for and whose parents became and remained financially able to care for it regardless of any economic or health obstacles put in their way? The sooner the cruel and criminal empty suit that is Ron Johnson is put away, the better.

[@michaeljohnangel6359]

YES, Michele!! Why do people listen to these berks? Why do they elect them????

[@MicheleEngel]

@@michaeljohnangel6359 I'm not sure that the people who elect them actually hear anything they say other than the content of their election ads. Do you suppose his comment was reported on Fantasy Fox or NewsMax? I don't know.... Do they watch Colbert or the other late-night hosts? Do they read any newspapers at all? (Do they READ at all?) Certainly they're not watching CNN or MSNBC...

[@michaeljohnangel6359]

@@MicheleEngel I know, I know …. It's bloody depressing. This is the flaw in Democratic Theory. If rule is by the majority, what do you do when the majority are uneducated Yahoos? (I have a theory that higher educated people-this still to be defined-should be given 3 votes, highschool and college educated people should be given 2 votes and the rest should be given 1. The flaw here, though, is that the super-rich will have paid their way through university. Any thoughts?)

[@MicheleEngel]

@@michaeljohnangel6359 Indeed, we are seeing that fatal flaw played out now, and I don't see any remedy for it. Brainwashed is brainwashed, and it looks like brainwashed has hit critical mass (a "tipping point," as Malcolm Gladwell would say). Your theory makes some logical sense, but I agree that in practice the potential for corruption is high. If I ruled the world (or the country) with a magic wand, I would reverse Citizens United , shut down the propaganda machines (FCC returns to enforcing media rules regarding false advertising and balanced news), impose term limits for all elected offices, require social platforms to be run as regulated utilities, prohibit elected officials from trading on the stock market, get assault weapons off the streets (and require background checks for gun licenses and a national registry of gun owners), lock up every insurrectionist, and expand the number of seats on the Supreme Court. But really, I am trying my hardest to find some way to accept the fact that nothing short of a miracle will turn us back around in the right direction at this point. It breaks my heart.

[@michaeljohnangel6359]

@@MicheleEngel Hey Michele, you'd have my vote, even though I'm British and live in Italy! It breaks my heart, too.

[@nicolesummers7965]

If it wasn't for Colbert I'd feel so alone. Refreshing and delightful. He's the best. :)

[@TheThird1977]

"Minnie Mouse wearing a pant-suit is making her too masculine" says the pant-suit-wearing Candace Owens.

[@ZachariahWest]

Conservatives: "Forcing Mini Mouse to wear a pantsuit! That's tyranny!!!" Also conservatives: "We need to ban a book about the holocaust for various reasons, don't ask."

[@MrSheduur]

also ultra leftwing : "we have to do something about Minni mouse looking female, lets put her in a masculine outfit because noone asked for it". And before you act like I am a conservative right winger, I am not, but I am getting tired of agenda being pushed down peoples throats...

[@asheer9114]

@@MrSheduur You known... Sigmund Freud would have a field day with you... 🤦‍♂️

[@abigailhowe8302]

@@MrSheduur you're not conservative at a glance... but you're even more MISOGYNISTIC than the Imperium of Man, if blurring gender lines is what triggers you >.>

[@brandonm949]

@@MrSheduur Lmao you can't be serious

[@gamepapa1211]

@@MrSheduur well you don't sound like a conservative, but you do sound like a grown man getting mad over a cartoon mouse and now I don't know which is worse.

[@robouroboros4269]

Oh man I love Stephen Colbert's Aviators' impression of Joe Biden

[@QuakesGameSpot]

Colbert was on fire in this episode.

[@allisone369]

Colbert is brilliant! Love his show. I am entertained!

[@NediSafa]

I LOVE it when Stephen sings or dances. We're so lucky to have such a talented host.

[@robvangessel3766]

I'm trying to recall the song he was using in the parody.

[@samreid6010]

@@robvangessel3766 I know. The tune sounds so familiar but I can’t tell what it is

[@AtCliche]

@@robvangessel3766 greatest love of all

[@robvangessel3766]

@@AtCliche Ooooohhhhhhhhh - Whitney Houston. She was so, SO gorgeous. I hate what happened to her. Sadder still, her daughter. When they can't handle the substance - it's always the Marilyn Monroe story.

[@MarcF.Nielssen]

"They have to consider whether they want children." "I am opposed to abortion." "Ha ha ha ha ha."

[@charg1nmalaz0r51]

Thats not contradictory i dont get what you think is funny

[@MarcF.Nielssen]

@@charg1nmalaz0r51 The "ha haha ha ha" is not funny, but sadistic. Do you understand now?

[@charg1nmalaz0r51]

@@MarcF.Nielssen not in the slightest help me out here

[@MarcF.Nielssen]

@@charg1nmalaz0r51 I helped. Maybe you need a reboot.

[@jadym8543]

@@MarcF.Nielssen that's not a contradiction. If you use your brain and analyze what he said.

[@bridgetanne8242]

This was one of the best monologues yet. Bravo!

[@sasentaiko]

Whoever wrote that Whitney parody to mock Sen. Ron Johnson's callousness definitely deserves an Emmy. If we can't have that, then I humbly request that they televise a sing-off with Amber Ruffin & Tarik Davis.

[@innnews6299]

For a retiring Supreme Judge and 83 years old, his speech is “young.”

[@captainshakesbeard2453]

81 year old Pelosi. Hasn't gained enough money insider trading. Just $300m. She'll be clutching it in her grave "for the children"

[@kristinLB]

@@captainshakesbeard2453 always a miserable troll lurking about.

[@gamepapa1211]

@@captainshakesbeard2453 why do you clowns always need to lie to make a point? It makes you sound untrustworthy and whatever point you're making not worth reading.

[@joshuaroe3021]

I thought so too. Hearing him I was thinking the fella was closer to 60

[@BobPagani]

@@gamepapa1211 Their plan is to tell really specific lies so they sound truthful.

[@kristinLB]

Oh my god… that weatherman’s face and body movements! 🤣🤣🤣 I mean he could have played it off with a little more swag. Sheesh. Lol He looked like my dog does when she surprises her self with a fart!

[@Its_Renee_]

Wow that ending! I was singing along loudly!!!🙌 😂

[@faustocardy5018]

That french part with Mickey's laugh... Omg I'm dead 🤣🤣💐💐⚰️⚰️

[@lw3269]

I keep forgetting how multitalented Stephen is. His rendition of Greatest Love of All was hysterical and flawless.

[@courtesy2336]

While they're all good, that was the BEST monologue! Stephen is truly a gift! And now that song is stuck in my head...

[@schrobro8964]

The simplicity of our president is actually very comforting.

[@denbro-qk5gz]

You mean him being a stupid sob ya so comforting

[@lynnjacobs2091]

V.P. Harris for Supreme Court Justice!

[@ameliecarre4783]

Considering a women must work twice as hard and be twice as good to get somewhere, and a black person must do the same, a black woman with credentials can already be considered automatically four times as qualified and competent. Just have to focus on best character and integrity now.

[@michaeljohnangel6359]

Do you know the rest of that statement? It's funny and true-a woman must work twice as hard as a man and twice as well; fortunately, that's not difficult.

[@ameliecarre4783]

@@michaeljohnangel6359 it's neither true nor funny.

[@Cypresssina]

@@ameliecarre4783 I think you might want to reread what he wrote.

[@thepillow13e39]

@@ameliecarre4783 offended?

[@simlei5475]

That does not ring true to me. Neither would it to most other persons. Though they might nod and agree from fear of instantly getting "debunked" by other baseless but mainstream-sounding "statistics".

[@ersylanellajoy452]

thank you Stephen that thorough shaming of what’s his name beautifully done. I savored every note.

[@ForeverMe543]

"In all time lines you're an idiot" is my favorite thing you've ever said

[@stormchasingirl1133]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Ron Johnson saying that right in front of a Kwik Trip. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣