No One Understands Descendants Like I Do

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[@discofuneral9075]

how are you literally so smart and funny and right about everything

[@jaylenhoskins4085]

The ONLY reason Jane breaks the "first letter of parent's name" thing, is because her name is literally just a reference to the "plain jane" character trope 😭😭

[@RohanCargill-l5f]

And, then Uma's last name I think is Jane.

[@staffdespell7802]

Since the new movie we can confirm that the known countries in the Descendants universe is Auradon, Evil Island, Wonderland and France

[@cloverboyblue]

something i've always found weird about the chocolate chips scene is that lonnie, daughter of mulan, is the auradon kid chosen for it. i cannot imagine a world in which mulan bakes chocolate chip cookies for any reason

[@pastelsheepy]

fr 😭 i think ir would work so well with dopeys son (im sorru idc enough ro rmr his name) because like regardless of who his mother is im sure snow white taught the dwarves how to bake

[@athenasimp9928]

Give some credit to Carlos, in the prequel book he broke a hole in the magic barrier on the island with a machine He made out of scraps In his tree house

[@onevoiceonedream02]

Her: Everything that happens is so ridiculous Me: R.I.D.I.C.U.L.O.U.S.

[@nicknickknack]

this video’s superlatives best moment: mal and evie hand holding tally worst moment: blue food coloring water

[@mirandabee2323]

"As if we don't know what a ship name is!" That's for the preschool viewers who haven't yet learned what a ship name is.

[@good33fun]

Shocked you didn’t mention the deleted kiss between Harry and Gil in descendants 2.

[@NiftyNiftie]

oh no i feel my descendants special interest returning help

[@multiplemysteries5242]

I'm being 1000% percent serious when I say you are one of the funniest people I've ever watched. Your sense of humor is amazing

[@user-bh5qr6ce3j]

Best 3 hour of my life I have ever spent

[@Angelsconspire]

Girl lol He said “thanks for rescuing me gorgeous face” . . . as in MY gorgeous face . . . not calling jay “gorgeous face”, as true and appropriate as it would’ve been for him to say that to him 😂

[@user-zo5fz8tc6g]

1:13:33 I think the whole point of the blonde hair spell was for the people in auradon to think their hair wasn’t naturally purple and that was just her dying it to be cool or whatever, hence why her hair in the second movie is longer and faded purple as if her trying to signify her growing out of being evil and trying to show that she has changed and that she’s actually “normal” like all the auradon kids by showing that her hair is actually a natural color like most of the auradon kids and not a vibrant color like the rest of the villains on the island, which is why she says that her hair is fake. I think she was trying to treat dying her hair blonde with the spell as like a way to make grow out as if her hair is naturally blonde and she’s letting the purple fade

[@user-zo5fz8tc6g]

ALSO in terms of relationships I feel like Jay should have ended up with Audrey rather than Chad ending up with her & Jay being hinted at liking Lonnie but if Audrey didn’t end up with either of them I whole heartedly think that Carlos and Audrey could have been SUCH an interesting couple in the first movie because Carlos needed to learn how to stick up for himself and make his own decisions and find his own sense of self while Audrey definitely needed to be less consumed in herself and I feel like they could both have such good character development together. Jane and Carlos are cute tho I guess just kind of a boring couple like I could see them getting together a mile away. I think Jane should just focus on herself in this movie as before she was depicted as like super shy and overlooked and like a follower. As for Doug I think he should have ended up with Lonnie their personalities would contrast nicely rather than evie and Doug I honestly think that the whole point of evie learning she doesn’t need a prince is that she doesn’t need a man and her and Doug being together just doesn’t make sense. I think they should have just let evie be evie and learn she doesn’t need to rely on ANYONE no prince no nothing to be amazing because she already is. Idk i could talk for hours about how out of place the descendants ships are. I personally thought Mal and Harry would be a lot better together than Mal and Ben too but I’m not even gonna get into that

[@user-zo5fz8tc6g]

Also worst descendants 2 costume is easily what they have Carlos in like 75% of the time they did him dirty with that side part his whole descendants one look was his peak costume wise and his descendants 3 outfits were terrible most the time too im sorry to say

[@user-zo5fz8tc6g]

Mals D2 isle look is amazing tho and Umas character design was really good too so was Harry’s so I will give them that I just wish that they gave the other characters like evie Carlos and Jay and even people like Jane better outfits in the 2nd and 3rd movie because I’m a sucker for the 1st movies fashion in general but I am a huge Carlos and Jay enthusiast so I’m used to my favorites being put on the back burn I’m probably like one out of the 6 male descendants fans anyway so I’m just gonna let the girls have it it’s not like it’s not a movie for 8 year old girls anyway 🤷

[@superkoopamocha]

2 D, 2 Scendants and "we don't make movies like this anymore... because of WOKE" were the best lines of the video 😂

[@LagoonaScreams]

the insane talent you have to capture my attention span for 3 hours and 11 minutes, wild

[@good33fun]

I can’t believe they locked all the gay people on an island in this universe.

[@stevelaine3851]

Really

[@stevelaine3851]

Real***

[@neivilde.1242]

- this is a fact you will know when you get into the books/animated show, but some of them do have siblings, lonnie has an older brother, harry hook has 2 sisters and chad clearly has a younger sister otherwise we wouldn't get the rise of red lmao. but it's also like, none of the extended media has one canon, they all build their own lore, so in the books harry has an older sister but in the show he has a younger one, so it's like okay i guess he has 2, even though he never mentions it. the books are fascinating because they work in canon with the movies, like there are pieces of lore from the books that are reflected in the movies, but it's insane that it's never mentioned lmao - i need to know what they put in descendants 2 for everyone to have such insane chemistry, like they left no ship unturned - see i never understood if harry said "thanks for saving me, gorgeous face" to jay as in jay is gorgous or "thanks for saving me gorgeous face" as in my face is gorgeous but he's scottish lmao. either way i've headcanonced this man as pan since he appeared on my screen in 2017, simply bc i get to say hook is pan lmao - also, you forgot the fact that they tried to pair jay w audrey in movie one, but she left so they tried w lonnie in movie 2 but she left also so by movie 3 so they gave up and were like he ends up with gil, fuck it lmao - this was great to watch before rise of red, putting me back in the mood before tomorrow. although the thing i am most excited about is the fact that cinderella and prince charming are played by brandy and paolo from cinderella 1997, and i love them so much, and i know they will be in like 3 scenes probably but i'll eat it up.

[@superkoopamocha]

Can't believe you actually did Diet Coke + Monster Energy for the 3rd one! 😂

[@koenkiryuu]

I just want to point out that Jay and Gil are implied to be a couple at the end of the movie, like during the break this down musical number everyone is dancing with their romantic partner, like Mal is dancing with Ben, Evie is dancing with Doug AND GUESS WHO IS DANCING WITH JAY? GIL, Gil and Jay are dancing together, ALSO they were lowkey flirting with each other during that scene where they do an icebreaker, they are a couple and no one is gonna convince me otherwise

[@ben_adel3437]

That would've made sense if they didn't build up mulans girl i don't even remember her name as a love interest for jay at the second movie i think she's the hannah statue and that was thier excuse for not having her in the movie😭

[@flyingpugz5446]

i would also like to point out that during night falls near the end when evie drops to the ground mal is just blatantly checking her out dove was doing the MOST 😭😭😭😭

[@staffdespell7802]

Just checked and she is SO blatantly checking her out

[@flyingpugz5446]

@@staffdespell7802RIGHTT LIKE ONCE U NOTICE IT ITS CRAZYYY

[@P3arls..]

Someone needs to make a full 3 hour gacha reaction to this ASAP😭

[@koenkiryuu]

Since the Descendants 4 trailer came out my hyper fixation on Descendants returned and this is exactly the video I needed to continue feeding my hyper fixation.

[@thestormbeforethecalm]

I love how the timestamps just gave up after the first movie

[@theflashfan4556]

Honestly, I think the fact that we need to talk made him even funnier and a lot more enjoyable on screen

[@Twix-iz8jp]

i have never seen descendants before and am still going to watch this full video

[@Twix-iz8jp]

I feel very enlightened and now need more phoebe video essays

[@mirandabee2323]

I love the Clara Bow eye makeup btw

[@NegaigotoSFM]

i am the n1 italian descendants fan and i now love you bro !!!!!!

[@kozanpink7578]

You are a real one for making a 3 hour video, I'm so exicted to watch this while I draw

[@sophiem6044]

I cannot BELIEVE you didn’t talk about the scene in D3 where Audrey pets Chad like a dog and he starts moaning aifkakjfkajxao (great video though! I fucking love this franchise)

[@StrawHatAphiwe]

This was the best 3 hours, thank you!!! please do rise of red

[@ryust7891]

This was so hard to find bc I saw that the video is out on TikTok and tried to find it but all that came up was decendants songs and phoebe buffay clips but I finally did it and the search was worth it

[@cass.cassandra1685]

Yes pleaseeeee. Will be back to watch this tonight when I’m off from work

[@Mecharnie_Dobbs]

35:01 "... one of the 1st major Disney projects where the main characters' parents are all..." I thought you were going to say: "...Alive."

[@cornholio7586]

So evil island is just Australia?

[@libsreese]

I have been waiting for this!!!🎉 this literally one of my favorite franchises. I love it so much. I’m like ten minutes in and the dead pan way you say Tony award winning actress Kristen Chenoweth is sending me 😂

[@Man-wolf-]

Maleficent/hades was actually a thing since the house of mouse-hades got a crush on maleficent n mickey tried to help him only to ruin everything But its okay since maleficent was into how much hades hates that gay ass mouse n the two got toghter I dont know if mal being their daughter is a reference to that episode but i choose to believe it is

[@BeeTrueBaker]

You pulling the “you didn’t think the story was over, did you?” at the end, how dare you

[@oliviaclove4582]

Just came from tik tok thanks for reminding me ❤ can’t wait for this to blow up

[@mirandabee2323]

Okay, I thought I left a comment on here but I guess I forgot to hit the button. 😅 Am I the only one who didn't think Ben and Mal were flirting upon their first meeting? I thought Ben was just nice and friendly to everyone (like Jane Bennet in Pride and Prejudice) and excited to see his proclamation in action by meeting 4 VKs (not just Mal but all of them). I thought Mal was just trying to be civil, begrudgingly. Also, I took "boyfriends are overrated" as "Mal is aroace, and that is why she wears purple and green," so you can imagine my disappointment when she got paired off with Ben for real.

[@JordanS-ww4eu]

I love you Pheobe I wish you had more vids❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ you’re my best friend

[@ben_adel3437]

Finally someone who doesn't like 3 as much as me i never liked it (most likely because i watched 1 and 2 as a kid and 3 later) but the movie didn't make sense for me😭

[@Doglover-tt3dz]

Hopefully Red will avoid wet, soggy socks in her movie (fan-fucking-tastic video, btw, can't wait to see more)

[@amandabray1330]

Wow 3 hours wow😮

[@lucyrambles]

the single only thing i believe you to be wrong about is that as a girl whose tech obsessed nerd dad has a 3d printer: it is absolutely that relevant in his life. the amount of 3d printed trinkets i own is perhaps unparalleled. yes it does absolutely always have that 3d printer texture all the time.

[@coraa232]

I understand u queen dw

[@Sorastara]

Yea it call Ever after high it came at the same year as descendants and read the books it tell u how they first meet it cute❤

[@pastelsheepy]

how are you not more popular wtf

[@RohanCargill-l5f]

I 💖 Descendants

[@The_Pale_Ranger]

OH YEAH LETS GOOO

[@tevenebrubaker4742]

No Doug, it’s a good guy don’t hate on him

[@tal0n759]

Can we get a video essay on Dungeons and Dragons Honor Among Thieves next?

[@linaahmed1428]

I am a descendants girly all the way!!!

[@BennyBoosHooks]

11:24 glad to see Benlos alive and well in 2024

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

12 minest in and this is soo funny and I love descendants and omg god this is a mest up move or like the evil island.

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

17 minites in and i think you have ruined the descendants movies for my, but that okey. And I never relayed how litter the boys.

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

35 min in and this is amzing

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

41 min in and omg you are so funny

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

43 min in I am laughing out loud I never do that

[@asthildurthorgilsdottir1762]

52 min in yes that was a weast of a dragon and I'm also not too fond of the scream thet ben makes sometimes

[@TristanGallicchio]

Your cool I wanna be friend's I love Descendant's to girl

[@ben_adel3437]

I wish rise of red was better now that it came out they cut a million scenes i wish they didn't even if they were bad it would've been better they obviously made it knowing they're gonna continue immediately with a part 2 but cmon like 1 and half hour wierdly written movie that doesn't even show the main plot point in my eyes it still a 7/10 because i see the potential of the story but cmon😔

[@arcemcaro]

can't believe I listened to this for three hours, but the narration and opinion were great. It is also true that we must give props to Dove for confirming in more than one interview how gay the relationship between mal and evie is

[@Pyrodxd]

FIRST IM HERE IN THE FIRST MINUTE

[@Pyrodxd]

IVE BEEN KNAWING AT THE IRON BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE

[@flyingpugz5446]

this was literally the best video ive ever watched in my entire life thank u fellow doug hater 🫡🫡