How To Sound Smarter tomorrow than you did yesterday: 3 mistakes to stop making

[@Emmy6662]

Your videos are so good( joking, I mean informative) and you’re so funny!

[@imtrashyyy1171]

Dan is amazing and I only wish I had discovered him sooner, currently wading my way through one of his courses, "step out of the shadows".

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Hi Bettie and keep on wading through that course; I think you'll be happy you did--once you come out the other side--and please take note of anything that applies directly to a situation you're experiencing that needs attention. And PRACTICE your response--in a mirror--in your head--out loud--whatever works for you. Communication skills are learned, studied and PRACTICED. They don't come naturally. They require work and it's normally practice that people don't give to the effort. So please practice your responses--please! :) Dan

[@katieferraraofficial]

My 3rd grade teacher forbade us from using the word “nice” in our journal prompts. She wanted the class to try and find another way of expressing ourselves. This video was a great reminder of that lesson.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Absolutely. My mother is always bothered by the word "nice." COME ON NOW--YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT WHEN DESCRIBING THE PERSON OR THING :)

[@thithanhthaoly1628]

I've got the impression that you were talking about me. I use a lot of intensifiers. Now it's time for me to "overcome" them in hope to become a savvy communicator. Thank you .

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I hope I've helped you to limit them a little, Thi. Dan

[@corinaeastman8579]

Dan , you have the best content on communication on KZbin . You presentation is fun and hilarious !!!!!!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks, Corina. I hope you press that "join" button so I can keep producing these videos.

[@Firuzeh]

I use a lot of intensifiers! It’s going to be quite a tweak for me.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well then tweak away Firuzeh!

[@Firuzeh]

Online Communication Skills Training Courses 😛😃I’ve been trying!! 🎉🙏🏼

[@michaelwhite2823]

Whatever you are using, you look GORGEOUS Firuzeh.

[@shellie1296]

Ditto - tweakin’ right Now 👍

[@painpatch333]

I’m sorry... hearing others say this, gave me awareness, of myself.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:) We've all been in that self-awareness boat, Rita.

[@williampowell3378]

This channel is a treasure.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Many thanks, William. Please share often :)

[@williampowell3378]

Will do

[@IchGluckspilz445]

You're THE conversation gambit!

[@Suzy585]

Let's all ring Dan's notification bell!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I'll vote for that, Suzanne. Sometimes it's good to have your bell rung :)

[@michaelwhite2823]

"People don't give anything of value away for free." Ooh! I am gonna use that one. Next time someone asks me if I REALLY think my current hair style is coming back into vogue I am going to say, "You know what they say? No one gives anything of value away and you prove it every time you open your mouth." OMG I love the way you have decorated your home. It us lovely, bright and cheery. Very stylish and unique yet homey. Now part of me wants to ask, half genuinely, if argyle is coming back like ABBA but you would shut me down in a New York minute. See? I am learning!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Michael, as you go through my videos--and I'm hoping you like and share along the way--please bear in mind that the end goal is mindful communication, not mud-slinging. I say this in all seriousness. If you put to use anything I teach, please bear in mind you want to bring peace to yourself, and give yourself a voice. But this does not have to be done at the expense of other people or getting them or gotcha's. I know you are joking--in your first sentence. But in case I am wrong about that--I thought I'd give you a gentle reminder that there is enough unmindful communication in the world today. Neither you nor I want to add to it.

[@michaelwhite2823]

@@TheWizardOfWords I am learning. I am referring to toxic people socially and driving them away. I am learning to diffuse situations from you. I was just showing a bad example by crossing boundaries by commenting on your lovely home and I think the argyle looks great on you. I feel if i don't be silly people will think I am being insincere.

[@michaelwhite2823]

I just provided an interactive example of how you teach to take the high road. :)

[@AlgisKemezys]

I found your responses accurate and well said. I think ...You are so smart!

[@treemarie3080]

Thank you for taking the time to provide us with these helpful & informative videos! Your concise, confident wisdom takes communication to a different, more approachable level for shy bumblers like me.😬 I will definitely be checking out your courses! Thank you!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks Treemarie, my videos serve as (hopefully) pretty good trailers--introductions to my online courses, which are the full movies.

[@itislife1973]

There so much I can say but don't want to publicly. But I do want to Thank you for these KZbin videos they have helped me in so many ways.

[@SarahRejsa-oi6bq]

Thanks. Anything I can say at work to sound smarter is greatly appreciated! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@sandybriggs6754]

I remember a co-worker describing a meeting we just left as "brutal". I don't remember the meeting. I just remember her description. :D.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Something like--your children won't always remember what you gave them as gifts for Christmas, but they'll always remember how you made them FEEL.

[@jesseniaserrano4071]

Love it!!! This is so good Correction: Will absolutely apply on my daily basis! Thanks! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:) :) :) Thanks Jessenia. You apply!

[@marythompson6736]

Fantastic and useful. Thanks Dan!

[@susanrosenberg5594]

Great! I absolutely love your videos. I was not raised in an executive family environment and so it is very helpful for me to watch your videos like my older brother, helping me how to make more progress in the executive workplace. One thing about giving feedback to my manager however, when I have found is that if we give negative feedback our bosses, They don’t like it. 😑 so many of them just want a yes man. Sorry that’s probably just a negative way of looking at things. But anyway, thank you so much for what you do. You give me hope that I can improve myself, or at least improve my skills to keep my job. ❤

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You can give negative feedback in a constructive way--that's the goal :)

[@louisumms2592]

It seems every year there is a popular phrase. This year...it's "right?" after every point...I work with engineers and I sometimes hear this several times in a short explanation.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Gets tedious, right??? (Sorry about that . . . .)

[@LaGabellaS]

This video was informative and profound!! Such common mistakes that I constantly make and am working on improving. Thanks for the tips!

[@LaGabellaS]

I will be sharing sharing sharing!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You're welcome, Shanell. And thanks for sharing!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Again, thank you Shanell! And please check out other videos and share those too. :)

[@AllTheButtons87]

I was skeptical, but you really are delivering what you said you would. It is more intelligent sounding to reduce intensifiers! Though I will say the amount of selling going on is giving infomercial...

[@discoverbitcoin4335]

I love your videos. Honestly its hard to keep up with a communications expert though but I'm trying. Ty

[@TheBohemianStyle]

Thank you. I am listening as I work from home. 💋

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Wonderful! I'd like to be helpful during these difficult times.

[@TheBohemianStyle]

Online Communication Skills Training Courses You are helpful,but I’m not a quick thinker like you are. I’m not that good with negative comments and be assertive to sound strong and confident. I have to admit that I noticed some improvements about myself because of your channel. 💗🥰😘💋

[@amyconnor3474]

I love your videos!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thank you Amy! I hope you share them too. Please do!

[@dclaet1135]

Thank you for these wonderful tips. Although I'm quite old now, I am learning so much from you. I am sharing your videos with my son. I wish that I had been taught these ideas when I was young, but hey, you're never too old to learn.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

My mother is 77, and considers herself in her prime. She learns every day, as I believe you do. And she shares information with her son :). You have a lot in common :)

[@user-rf5pb7cx6z]

DanDanDan I'VE been that person in office that "speaks my mind" & it's hurt me many times. YOU r !st person I've understood. Thanku so much!! I will try VERY HARD now :) TY

[@chimbob67]

I love your specific tips and can't wait to try them out at work. Listening to your videos has been therapeutic for me as I navigate a new job with many personalities to adapt to. Thanks!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Happy to help, K D.

[@mikefink5847]

I have found that 'absolutely' can be an effective intensifier. Especially when someone is apologizing (It's absolutely no problem) - but I probably need to use more selectively since I likely overuse it.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I agree with you that in moderation "absolutely" can be an effective intensifier. The key word is "moderation" of course :)

[@jewlz8538]

Thank you! And also to Jupiter 11:11 for sharing. Delightfully appreciate how to get rid of those, overused intensifiers.👍

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You are so welcome and my thanks to Jupiter as well!

[@siyz2892]

I tend to use Intensifier's in sarcastic comments more than anything else! The word "um" is used way too much by some people and feels especially awkward when used by someone who follows it with a basic sentence or one simple word which doesnt have depth or an appropriate answer in the situation. Love your videos, soooooo useful! And you have such a great presence and voice... subscribed.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks Sly Z. Now about those sarcastic comments--maybe you want to take that up a notch or two? (Just sayin'--and that's another one we could eliminate--just sayin'??)

[@graceamos6048]

I sent the vice president of the company and email thanking him for a wonderful bbq luncheon and he responded, absolutely. That was great

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:)

[@dwightschrute4252]

I’ve binged watched your videos and wondering if you offer personalized coaching? I am a 29 year old female professional suffering from imposter syndrome. Learning a lot from your videos but would love to also take a step further.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Yes, write me at [e-mail].

[@5maz]

Thank you Dan, for your valuable lessons. You make me want to be better person in all possible ways.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You're welcome Molly, and thank you for your kind words.

[@tanamariedanisi6987]

just, but!, and i 🙄ughhhh I drive myself crazy sometimes, I’m working on it .

[@thejosh777]

The filler words that I catch myself using the most are "you know" or "you know what I mean" Now that I am hyper aware that I do it, I have noticed many others using these as well

[@TheWizardOfWords]

"To tell the truth" is a pet peeve of mine. It makes me want to say "No, please lie to me." (But I don't say it. :) :)

[@unknowninfinium4353]

Dan your videos are - Rapturous.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well there's a new adjective for me. I think I'll take it! Thanks, Akshay.

[@miranda951]

Excellent advice!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Glad it was helpful, Miranda.

[@trudyletson1264]

i so love these video's i need to watch all and invest in your video's

[@TheWizardOfWords]

If you want complete training programs, Trudy, go to danoconnortraining/store. and you'll find what you're looking for.

[@mslisaredd]

Thank you....very informative and useful.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks, Lisa.

[@sundipsundas7543]

Thank you for sharing your experience ❤️

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You are most welcome Sundip.

[@Mushroom321-]

Thought provoking question " what specific " filler word " do you cant stand.

[@chinkyfist6655]

I'll be practicing this starting tomorrow. 😁 Thanks for sharing.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:)

[@an831]

hello dan, i have been watching your videos for a while now. only problem is i am learning all these rules but get lost with where and when i should use them. I do have a tendency to overthink things but i have amajor problem with ceratain people in work, where they speakover me and dont let get my point across. or people will mock my mistake or mock me in general and i never have a come back. i am that guy that doesnt get it. someone in work will make a comment from across the room and i will completly miss what they are talking about. then they will all start to laugh and say he doesnt get it, he is thick. (i know i am smarter than them) all i try to do is get on with what i am supposed to do and go home, but i have people getting in my way takeing my credit. if i say anything i am a kiss ass, or i dont care about the company. or the one that gets under my skin "you cant make me". i never have a cme back for this stuff.

[@cobosigatti5881]

In the way you communicate, there's a conclusion that you desperately need Dan

[@an831]

@@cobosigatti5881 yes but what and how.

[@romainecalm1108]

Good for you for focusing on self improvement in what sounds like a pretty toxic work environment. Dan mentions flash cards of key phrases sometimes, have you invested in those yet? Bet the skills you practice on these meanies will come in handy at a new job 🤷‍♀️ Truly professional people don’t treat others this way, for any reason

[@cobosigatti5881]

@@an831 romaine calm1 has a good answer and good suggestions

[@TheWizardOfWords]

an831 you emailed me this morning and I answered immediately, much to Jean's astonishment since I am normally inordinately slow doing that. Please consider what I wrote to you. It also incorporates romaine calm1's ideas. Great minds apparently still think alike. :)

[@greshe6369]

Thank you for such valuable training. Despite causing me to tune out and disregard what’s being said…..“Like” is too obvious and tagged to an age group…..for more mature people, “actually” is annoying, and unnecessary.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Actually--you have that right!

[@lr692]

Comforting :)

[@GS-st9ns]

After a mother's worst nightmare a few years ago, I went from being eloquent to rambling nervous long-winded. I do not like to hear people hurling around the word. " just".

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Point taken, Gabrielle S.

[@lr692]

Am in much pain&you made me laff thanku!! Laffin is key 🔑

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You're right about that; it's still the best medicine.:()

[@jhuntman7437]

I hope to incorporate these tips

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:) :)

[@vickyalberts6716]

Dan, are all your courses aimed at communicating with work colleagues? I need one for communicating with family/friends etc. Just day-to-day people skills.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Vicky, I invite you to look around my videos and you'll find many many dealing with communication tips for everyday use--at home. Also, many of the business techniques and scripts and approaches I recommend would apply equally well to personal situations. For example--the broken record. It is a technique I learned from my own home experience--when I was growing up. My mother used it with great regularity, to prevent her sons from bugging her to death once her mind was made up. When you have a particular topic in mind--"search" it on my KZbin channel.

[@empresszoe9351]

Basically.😂 Do not talk like the Kardashians. I love your videos. I've learned something again. Grateful.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well . . . . yes.

[@abhinavlahiri]

What are those words that you can learn to use when asked to provide feedback to your seniors?

[@irishcountrygirl78]

I'm Irish actually living in Ireland 🇮🇪, they'd take the piss outta me if l started talking like that 😁, (over here everything is "grand" 🤣) BUT I LOVE your videos, being schooled for sure.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well Tracey, as that Irish poem goes--take what works and throw the rest away! (The poem is about friendship, but I've contorted it to work for the purpose of this response.)

[@irishcountrygirl78]

@@TheWizardOfWords What!! You replyin to little aul me!? I'll try to put my own spin on it 😩🤣, I've binge watched so many of your vids, you have a brilliant way with words. Dare l say it? It's the Irish in you 😁😁😁.

[@snowsonline]

My horrible filler word is..."soooo... the purpose of this call is...". I cringe when I hear myself start a call with "soooo. "

[@TheWizardOfWords]

That's a good one too.

[@AV-nq8zn]

This video was edifying, thanks! (How sad that?)

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Not sad to me, Ashley 🙃😎

[@marilynl2545]

I always question "well to be honest" does that mean they are usually not?

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Or, "to tell the truth" . . . .

[@KarmasAbutch]

Something I’ve learned from 10+ years of interviewing people as an investigator is: Trustworthy people never begin a sentence with the words “Trust me...” and people who are being honest don’t have to announce it before telling the truth about something. Because they just get on with being those things and there’s no reason for them to worry they won’t be believed when they are relaying something to you for the very first time. Excessive “confidentiality signalling” is also a red flag. People who can keep a secret, just keep them. Watching to see if their actions and behaviours are congruent with their words is a much faster way to get to know a persons core character.

[@Gothicforever1790]

They want to be able to be critical and negative.

[@christinebeames2311]

I ha e a friend who inserts “ as I was saying” I her conversation , then repeats what she said previously

[@irishcountrygirl78]

Does she think you are deaf? 😁

[@jimhayhurst1201]

"Well" and "I don't know." Yes, they actually say, "I don't know."

[@TheWizardOfWords]

:)

[@bellasmom2597]

Upbeat as always

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks Miss Wrenchinitup. Please share with those who are upbeat (and like-minded) or downbeat (and need a little charge in their motor).

[@Mushroom321-]

When a person of authority is asking y0u " what do you think " ? They are asking what investment are you getting?". .

[@jbloveday9538]

‘Aeromatic’? Does that mean the food flies off the plate? Lol

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Good one :)

[@jbloveday9538]

@@TheWizardOfWords Just teasing - I love your videos!

[@sukhpalsandhu6341]

Working currently in a manager position, the fluff you suggest in the middle of your video really turns me off when I hear it. Just my opinion, the rest is great!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Sukhpal Sandhu, if anything was helpful (dare I say great??) I am grateful. Not everything is for everyone and I am happy you registered your thoughts. They will be duly noted.

[@unnamedchannel1237]

Drives me nuts when people say “like” in what I call out of context. An example , “oh I’m like so happy”

[@magicalunicorn5853]

Filler words I hear all the time: so, um, whatchamacallit, really, way, totally

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Gets tiresome, doesn't it?

[@MrCijuciju]

omg!When you talked about giving an opinion about food,I INSTANTLY remembered Joe Pesci in Goodfellas...you know,the restaurant scene,where Pesci is telling a joke,and Ray Liota kind of laughs out of fear twds Pesci,overreacting with joy....Pesci then asks him WHAT is SO funny...?(couple of times)...trying to look more intimidating every time he asks that...Liota shits his pants because he really can't give a satisfying answer to a killer mobster (he can't be specific enough to explain,because he laughed to satisfy dangerous boss's vanity) ...and after a minute of agony,Peschi starts laughing as in he was just f.around with his nerves.....a monstruos reminder of how clarity,truthfulness and simplicity changes the whole communication system.....as in "oh,these brocolies are sooooo good"....(Pesci's voice): "what dooya mean GOOD?how GOOD...?wha's good about them...?."....you should really watch that specific scene Dan,it's hillarious🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I've watched that movie more than once MrCijuciju and therefore can appreciate your analysis of that scene. We can learn so much from a great movie and great actors. It's like watching real life, with the advantage that you're not in the scene!

[@SheilaHCoach]

This is good information and advice, however I find that it will only be as beneficial as the person who is receiving the words you are using. I remember when I wrote one of my first job application cover letters and I made sure to use words, phrases and punctuation that I was told would wow the person reading it. I did get the job but it didn't take long for me to realize that paying extra attention to the use of those words, phrases and punctuation to dazzle the interviewer played no part in it because he wouldn't have recognized them if they jumped off the page and slapped him across the face. I believe often times the same thing holds true in the words we speak.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I agree that sometimes we are not heard. However, the words we speak are generally impactful and should be chosen carefully. I don't doubt the example you shared, Sheila. However it was a singular case and I'm guessing a unique one.

[@HeavenlyDivineTaro]

Sharing

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thank you!~

[@jumondehtweh7324]

I’ve been doing it completely wrong. I can only imagine what people are actually thinking. This *#!%ing cave beast! 😂

[@TheWizardOfWords]

YEAH, CAVE BEAST!!! NOW SHAPE UP OR SHIP OUT!!!! :) :)

[@teresasliwinski1778]

What if the meeting was boring, stupid, unproductive and a complete waste of time?

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Teresa, I'm not sure what you're asking.

[@leafmealoynederpydeu85]

So much

[@treemarie3080]

One filler word I've grown to dislike is......LIKE. Because like every other like word is like and like it's like not ok.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Yeah, like hearing that word is like like like--AWFUL.

[@Hathor333]

"You know what I mean"

[@michaelwhite2823]

OMG you mention a pet peeve of mine. Don't use 20 dollar words! It is so transparent phony! So I didn't come here completely clueless!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

And I hope you don't leave completely clueless, either.

[@michaelwhite2823]

@@TheWizardOfWords I am learning a lot from you, even it seems like I am hiding it. Take care.

[@beckys9097]

Filler word “right” & “ya know”

[@bbblackwell]

I'm not sure I'm understanding correctly... People don't give away what they deem valuable? What about someone who has an important message, like Martin Luther King? Should he wait to be asked his opinion? Doesn't he have a moral obligation to spread the wisdom he's found to anyone within earshot?

[@theproductownerexperience3904]

which mic are you using?

[@treemarie3080]

Isn't the sound fantastic?!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

One that a friend sent from South Africa--

[@julie-annpeeples687]

You know what I mean?

[@tredention3859]

when people start every third sentence with '''oH mYy GoD'''

[@TheWizardOfWords]

OMIGOD, I agree. (I think it might be OK to use it JUST ONCE.) I get your drift Tredention. It gets tiresome and serves no purpose.

[@Kathy-vv9ir]

You're funny as 💖💖💖

[@jeanettamoore5039]

Um and like are my filler words. I know it and I hate it. I use "um" out of habit. I'll know the answer and will still use "um" 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@TheWizardOfWords]

You can break that habbit, Jeanetta. You can.

[@jeanettamoore5039]

@@TheWizardOfWords thanks, I appreciate that. I'm making sure I stop myself from using it outside of work, as well as taking a breathe when I'm nervous about speaking

[@kittypurry4056]

❤❤❤

[@cica8999]

How about the Canadian filler word "eh?"

[@TheWizardOfWords]

goose down That's a great Canadian filler. And yes "eh?" is another one :) :)

[@swim610]

My filler words are ummm and uhhhh. Its a problem!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Yes, but it's a problem that you can solve with a little awareness and practice, Tonya.

[@noellegonsal201]

Filler word. Yeah? after every sentence

[@jerzeygirl757]

You know is one of my horrible fillers 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Agreed.

[@irishcountrygirl78]

lol we say that over here as part of the culture, none of us know, but we say it all the time 😩

[@Kevfrom95]

I’m here because I am tired of talking ghetto lmao 😂 I need help.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well Torey, you have come to the right place. Personally, I don't care if you're talking ghetto or CEO, as long as you're talking mindfully.

[@dawnrumbutis3433]

You know....

[@RevivalHomeDecor]

Like

[@christinevankammen6109]

In the Netherlands we hardly use intensifiers. We notice that Americans over do it. It seems cultural.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Thanks for that info Christine.

[@s.wesleygouzeh421]

You are good, but you speakers faster and it makes the lessons difficult to learnt.

[@trenapatzer3631]

What about Trumps very very expressive ways? Or another word “got” or “boughten”.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Well there is expressive, educated and colorful and there is--groping, uneducated and wrong. You'll have to decide which is which, Trena. :)

[@venesawhite6544]

....when people say 'awm' after every other word😠

[@TheWizardOfWords]

Uhhhhhhm, yeah--I know what you mean Venesa.

[@blackcavi4515]

😂

[@flawlessstrategy9972]

Can't believe he mentions intensifiers and forgot the new fad catch-all replacement intensifier, "super." Ugh. It's super annoying to hear people constantly using this instead of really and very, etc.

[@TheWizardOfWords]

I was waiting for you to mention it, Flawless and I thank you for that. Perhaps my omitting it shows my age? "Super" is common for younger people and again--thanks for including it in the ughhhhh category.

[@nifty69f1]

slow down your talking please it will make easier understand

[@TheWizardOfWords]

The speed at which I speak is a curse. I'm stuck with it.

[@susanalpajon6516]

Ummm do not like it thanks Dan!!

[@TheWizardOfWords]

OK--what do you not like?

[@tehzeebpatel]

someone pointed out recently that i use the word "like" a LOT, and ever since i noticed they were right i've been trying so hard to shake it off but it just won't go away 😭 not sure when i picked it up but i can barely speak 3 sentences without throwing a "like" in somewhere, even though i know it's poor speech 😭 still trying though, hopefully i'll get rid of it soon 🥲