problematic

[@teriyaki_chick]

no one wants to talk about how Sienna denying the accusations by partly saying that Jack gave her mixed signals is the exact same thing a man says when he s3xually harasses or assaults a woman. "She gave me mixed signals! I thought she wanted this!" it's the same thing. just because it's a woman doing the assaulting doesn't make it any different. it's still non-consentual.

[@trujilloitzel]

THIS

[@thelittleunicorn6196]

Exactly, she knows what she did. Jail.

[@A.Jae012]

This

[@teriyaki_chick]

@The Dark Overlord exactly. consent can be given and taken away at any point in time. even if the s3x is already happening. any and all parties involved should be given the ability to take away consent at any moment.

[@Jack-gp3xm]

EXACTLY, if it's not a straight up yes, it's an automatic no.

[@Marquiselee1371]

22:18 "Just because you don't go to the police about something, doesn't mean it didn't happen" PREACH

[@triniditrenches]

see that’s what i’m saying. like her legal team keep emphasizing that no criminal or civil charges have been filed, but just because jack didn’t file them doesn’t mean that she didn’t literally assault him.

[@crimson_auror]

From a legal standpoint not going to the police is the best case scenario for a defense lawyer. Yes it absolutely could have still occurred but many attorneys use that as "proof" that it "wasn't that bad" which is sometimes true and sometimes not.

[@katyp5297]

That made me feel so safe and validated

[@mrpeach2023]

@@crimson_auror That in itself is fucked up.

[@memethingz6004]

He also literally said she SA-ing him is not unforgivable 😐

[@juzahyodo]

as a woc and also latina… she’s insane, like literally… she said; why the fuck bring out the fact you’re latina when you’re accused of SA’ing someone? like what? does she think we’re going to say something like “oh no not the latina card :( we can’t do shit now :(“ if anything, her shamelessly using her ethnicity makes me even more pissed off since she clearly only cares about it as long as it can help her get away with shit

[@thecatlurking]

She's like Kevin Spacey coming out as gay when he got accused

[@m.josena4485]

And she’s barely latina, about 25% and she only uses it for her benefit not when there are issues in the community to help out with her large platform

[@Jane-ul5hn]

NOT TO MENTION being latina is an ethnic group not a race so shes a whole ass white woman being like oh wow stereotypes boo :(( FIND SOME SORT OF SEMBLANCE OF A LIFE !!

[@misha5570]

I find it odd that this came out all from Jack's side. An entire youtube apology-style blog about putting personal info about the situation to the internet to gain sympathy. Also how there is not an equal side to accusing him, seems fishy. They also found evidence of him having paid bots to incite hate against her. It's he-said she-said situation. She's not using this for internet clout and is going about her life. The fact that she is inexperienced and he knew that is why this is even being given the time of day. A white male coming after a Latina because he's mad that she fell for him? love and assault are 2 different things. He wants to benefit from this as much as possible. Sounds like since now people have gained sympathy for effeminate males, women are even more shit on and now that people want equality, women are treated the same when they don't have the same motives to men and men women do. Women wat power yadda yes but women are the ones who get drunk and coersed. Men can too, but what would a women's motive be for that? What does she gain? Nothing. That's why men do it more. People will feel bad for him because he expects ppl to view him that way, which is why everyone is playing right into his hands. He just wants money power and clout. I commend sienna for being strong and not giving the responses he wants. Sienna being in Hawaii is great. Because as a local they absolutely hate white ppl and especially white males. We call them "Haole". She also passes as local. Nobody cares about mainland stuff on tiktok. Most of the island isn't even aware of the app. She's living her best life and none of this matters. He wants to drag her because he can't go be himself.

[@-miaumiau]

@@misha5570 Oh my god??? The victim blaming holy cow? Your wording this like it's some petty cheating scandal and not a literal crime 💀

[@electricbaby7315]

i'm a 17 year old girl, and i understand boundaries and consent and how to take no as an answer. sienna has no excuse

[@sm1purplmurderedme583]

exactly same

[@strangerscience3659]

I'm also 17 and shes acting as if shes still a young teen, like were almost adults we have gone through so many experiences and been taught how much on how the world works so she is aware of what shes doing.

[@Louiza-06]

@@strangerscience3659 me too like no bab we are adults ish

[@Meamery]

I’m 15 and I understand 😂

[@3FrogsinTrenchCoat]

I am 13 (almost 14) and get no means no

[@tjm8128]

“You don’t need to be an ally, you just need to not be an abuser”. That was SO true. She is gross.

[@Becksnnc]

It's weird to me that 17 year olds outright say themselves "oh im only 17." It's too self aware. If you're 17 and doing dumb shit and then saying "i'm only 17 i do dumb shit" it feels like you shouldnt be doing dumb shit if youre aware that youre doing dumb shit? lol Its up to other people to point out your flaws when your young and then you learn from it. Sienna constantly pointing out that she's young just feels like an excuse that she just keeps jumping back to as a defense for the shit that she does.

[@angelfall3813]

EXACTLYY

[@k-popbiased1058]

Exactly my thoughts, her lawyers definitely told her to say that

[@Vincisomething]

I'm pretty sure most teens are aware of what SA is too. I couldn't imagine doing that at 17.

[@kelsey3576]

seriously, im 17 and even i know how to respect people's basic boundaries lol (or if i fail to do so, i apologize and stop doing it)

[@Becksnnc]

@The Dark Overlord adults don't say "oh I'm only 40" to excuse themselves though lol. If you do something wrong, own it. Don't hide behind your age. Like I said, it's too self aware to use age as a defense for yourself. If you know it's wrong then don't do it. If you realise it's wrong after, then apologise and say "I did something dumb, I should know better, I won't do it again." Sienna has done non of that so her age is irrelevant, it doesn't make sense for her to keep bringing it up. "I did something wrong but I'm only 17 so it's okay. Other things that I do wrong, please just forgive me because I'm only 17." No I won't. You're aware it's wrong so your age is no excuse.

[@izziedias]

sienna's letter is a great example of a pr product. constantly denying accusations, pointing out that she's young (therefore should not be hold to high standards), bringing up examples of how she was in the past, and pointing out that she's a poc and a minority. I completely agree with Dylan, I don't think she learned at all. I deeply feel for Jack. as a woman who's been through similar experiences, and been disbeliefed, I know how seeing the abuser trying to defend themselves feels like. it's way worse when they get the high ground. luckily the majority of people who's seeing this history are on the right side, and hopefully jack will recover from this

[@reaganbartels9993]

It's classic deflection. "I didn't do it but if I did, it's not really my fault and it's really not that bad."

[@ShamaD274]

It's also more like she's not apologizing to the victim of her actions out of genuine regret. She is apologizing to the internet to save her career

[@warishakhan9339]

I'm so sorry for the things you had to go through

[@bubblegum8959]

@@reaganbartels9993 quadruple negative, sounds about right.

[@Spanish101class]

Same here sis, I hope there's justice for Jack.

[@spacegirl9006]

Dylan explained the whole "conflict sells" thing so well.

[@alexandriatibbets5920]

IKR! It made so much sense.

[@misha5570]

She's in Hawaii,...she doesn't need to make money off this. Only white males using their "effeminate side" to gain the internet sympathy would be jealous enough to make shit up like this.

[@egendary6811]

@@misha5570 what are u talking abt?

[@CAT-xo2kj]

Right?!? Make sense

[@ItsMeLexie14]

Literally all public figures do this especially celebrities

[@HandiDandiBrandi]

I really hate when ppl overuse the "I'm young and dumb" excuse. Like that only gets you so far. You say that when you embarrass yourself trying to impress someone, dye your hair a wacky color, or throw a party you know you shouldn't. You don't say that when you s3xually assault someone! Last I checked, 17 is still old enough to know right from wrong.

[@Ayat-io4vw]

She is basically saying she is stupid cause she is going literally embarrassing herself a 13 year old Would know better.

[@elisechiari3103]

Exactly, this type of stuff is common sense and basic human decency. It’s disgusting how she’s using her age to excuse herself

[@JammyJams289]

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT!!!

[@Gabriela-bd1tn]

When I was 10yo a dad of my friend was trying to sue me, because I texted him „kill yourself 😂”. It was a very dumb thing to write and I was with my friends writing it, because he was really annoying to all the girls and people in the class in general. It was 10 years ago and right now I understand that I was a kid and his father should not scare me and my parents with court rooms, but at the time I felt too old to explain anything with my age. I felt like I did such a horrible thing and that I will be sued and treated like an adult. When you are young and stupid, you are too young and too stupid to realise that. She is manipulating the facts in order to seem innocent.

[@HandiDandiBrandi]

@@Gabriela-bd1tn Well yeah but 10 years old is actually young enough to blame your actions on immaturity. She’s like a teen to young adult lol

[@Lisa-ly3ij]

"Just because you didn't go to the police about something doesn't mean it didn't happen..." Yes - louder for the people in the back!!

[@heywhatupitsash7389]

A small thing that stood out to me in the sienna mae essay, is the fact she used a picture of her and Jack. Like wtf. If the person that assaulted me wrote a defense and used a picture of me and them together in it, i would be fuming, scorched earth energy. I understand her whole point is "its not that bad" so it supports her point to have that picture to manipulate her audience. But like, I don't even think she asked Jack if she could use it. I am totally assuming there, so if I'm wrong I'm wrong. But if I'm right, it's such a clear indication that she still doesn't understand the issue, her complete disregard of consent

[@ve.625]

no way she had the audacity to ask to use a picture of them in a defense/denial article of her sa jack

[@baddest5777]

Imagine her looking for a picture to use and out of all of them she chose that picture💀💀

[@Sofia-lu1tp]

That was the first thing i noticed. Thought i was the only one. Incredibly disgusting.

[@rain_drops2723]

I was thinking the same thing. I was like why she put that pic? That is just... doesn't sit right It felt really out of place

[@baddest5777]

No but the fact that it was HER😭 not her team. It was her. And according to her she is the victim and that’s not a very victim thing to do

[@shelby.4328]

The details in that packaging are DOPE. Like the 'Late Night Dylan' lights, the headless Julius body... AMAZING

[@sprout_draws4855]

The wanted poster was so clever too! Since people compare him to Flynn. I think the wanted poster had no nose on it? Or I might be mistaken but if it did then that’s a really amazing detail

[@annejia5382]

@@sprout_draws4855 i didnt have a nose 🤣🤣🤣 very on-brand

[@shelby.4328]

@@sprout_draws4855 Yes! Exactly!! Absolute brilliance.

[@lolilo2759]

Exactly!!

[@idaf3028]

where did Chleo go?

[@Marquiselee1371]

Ngl, I feel that the age defense doesn't really work in terms of the SA stuff. At 17 you're more then aware you shouldn't grope unconscious people... she was 17, not 10 (edit for the comments: I’m not saying SA is okay if you’re 10, of course it isn’t and the age of your abuser does not negate nor trump the trauma a victim will deal with for the rest of their lives. That’s not an excuse. I was just trying to make a point that by the time you’re 17 you are more than conscious/in control of yourself that you should know not to do those things, she’s not a child still learning boundaries/how to interact with people)

[@goldenageofdinosaurs7192]

I caught a friend of my brother’s doing that at a party. A friend of ours was passed out on the couch & he was leaning all over her, trying to feel her up. He got his ass kicked. I was around 18-19 & he was like 16-17. This was in 1985. It’s not like being young gives you carte blanche to be a rapey creep. When I first called him out he looked guilty. He knew what he was doing. This was over 35 years ago. Being young wasn’t an excuse back then. It absolutely shouldn’t be now.

[@saraearriazola4915]

@@goldenageofdinosaurs7192 so glad u did that, so many guys just turn a blind eye and defend their friends who do that shit

[@Felixia33]

True, but even 10 years old can do SA. CoCSA (Child on Child SA) is not as weird as many people thing. It still traumatizes victims for life, but is a very complicated topic.

[@a.h.9959]

THISS

[@salty_fish8762]

I was SAed at 10 by a classmate who was also 10. She isn’t ever excuse, even if your 5 years old, think of the victim. Should the kid be locked up? No but it’s not an excuse for their behavior

[@laurenphilipp4337]

I am a woman of color myself, and I find it so horrible that there are people out there who use that as an excuse or as a shield to hide behind. It really is a slap in the face for the actual people who have been discriminated against because of their race, gender, or otherwise. This girl's behavior is so disgusting, she flat out denies and gaslights, despite the evidence that she is clearly in the wrong.

[@katie8881]

That reminds me of when Kevin Spacey "came out" and talked about his struggles as being a closeted gay man... after all the stuff about him victimizing teen boys came to light. What do you want- a rainbow parade??? You're a p*do and that has nothing to do with sexual orientation! He got zero "witch hunt" leniency because it wasn't a witch hunt- he deserved to be burned at the stake. And trying hide behind that shield was incredibly obscene because that lends false credence to the lie that queer folks are predators just because they're queer. Latina women (and all women of color) do face harmful stereotypes that cause real damage to innocent people- using the anti-racism movement to trojan horse yourself past accountability for predatory behavior is so messed up.

[@jovanaespinoza6124]

Adults can't apologize either. I once had a professor who would say "if you turn in mediocre work, you'll get a mediocre grade" in response to any time I asked her a question. Keep in mind, I asked questions like "how many pages should this assingment be?" Nothing unreasonable or stupid. When I brought it up to the department chair and got others involved, she semi-apologize by saying "sorry if you felt like I meant you. You must have been projecting your insecurities." 🙄

[@sameeha2621]

"you must have been projecting your insecurities" if i had a dollar for every time I've heard that line-

[@jovanaespinoza6124]

@@sameeha2621 aww I'm sorry about that. It sucks to hear that, especially if it's not true and they're trying to gaslight you.

[@sameeha2621]

@@jovanaespinoza6124 ain't that the truth, girl.. and i'm sorry you had to hear that too, it really does suck :/

[@VioletWaves44]

Some people get into that line of work solely to power trip. I'm sorry you had to deal with that kind of BS.

[@alysongrace5044]

I was raped and sexually assaulted repeatedly around the ages of 5-7. It was a time of my life that I still get extremely emotional speaking about and it happened so long ago. I was raped by my 20 year old step brother and sexually assaulted buy my father. My father was one of those people everyone liked, was charming, good looking, and seemed like a good person. Imagine a Ted Bundy serial killer type. I didn’t tell anyone that it was happening because the one time I did, they didn’t believe me because of who my abusers were. When I was finally able to escape to my moms, I told her everything. My mom was ready to murder them, but they used the exact same defenses as Sienna, the 20 year old saying he is only 20 so he’ll make mistakes and my father saying that I was asking for it. He said that I gave him signals that I wanted it, though I don’t know what the fuck he was talking about it. They tries to say I was lying and when people started to find out, I was met with a wave of criticism and people who didn’t believe me. They would say that my father and step brother were good men and would never do such a thing so what did I do to tempt them. Also if something did happen, why didn’t I come forward sooner, why wait so long? Maybe it had to do with the fact that I was scared of that exact reaction. I have seen a lot of people that claim Jack’s lying say the same things and it makes me beyond angry. Jack’s video was also very telling, you could see how difficult it was for him, but he was trying to hold it together. Siennas response just shows to me that she is a liar. The way she has reacted just solidified for me that she is a classic abuser that always has to be the victim Edit: Because people will not let up on this. I understand my situation is much different from Jack and Sienna’s since I was a child and the people who did what they did to me were adults, but my point was that it doesn’t matter your age or who your abusers are, they had be no right to violate you. I hate seeing abusers not take accountability for what they did and blaming the victim. It makes me sick

[@rebeccahicks2392]

I'm so sorry they did those horrific things to you.

[@segga_roo]

I am so sorry that happened to you! I hope that some day you are able to heal from that pain, NO ONE deserves that kind of treatment.

[@moiralyn23]

Wtf?? A 5-7 year old was TEMPTING??? If I heard someone say a CHILD was asking for it, I'd want to respond with: I guess you're asking for me to find a woodchipper to toss you in feet first. No, that's too quick. A meat grinder then. 🤬🤬🤬

[@alysongrace5044]

@@moiralyn23 Yeah, apparently the butterfly dresses that I wore all the time were “too short” I don’t understand how anyone could have thought I would be asking for it because I was literally the most innocent child. I was scared of the hiccups and made flower crowns out of dandelions. But clearly I was asking to raped as a 5 year old cause that makes total sense

[@zumramehdi7954]

I hope you are okay now :)!

[@cathyung]

but just to be clear, no matter if you’re dating someone or involved with someone romantically or not, if you crossed a boundary, you crossed a boundary. sa and rpe can still happen between two people that are romantically involved or not so her excuse of them dating or whatever doesn’t really excuse her actions if they were even dating.

[@taehofu]

yes, i feel like people try disregard stuff like this, because they believe everything is automatic consent because you are in a relationship

[@patch2932]

Exactly. I don’t mean to make this about me cause it’s not, but I literally didn’t understand I could say no until I met my current partner, because of my past relationships conditioned me that only the guy’s happiness matters. My current partner was horrified and he’s been helping me get used to understanding it’s okay, I’m in control of what happens to me, and he would *never* be happy if I wasn’t. This should be the *bare minimum.* This girl should face the legal consequences of what she’s done, regardless of age, regardless of race or gender. It doesn’t matter if you are dating the other partner or not. Anything other than verbal or very obvious consent is *not* consent.

[@misha5570]

I find it odd that this came out all from Jack's side. An entire youtube apology-style blog about putting personal info about the situation to the internet to gain sympathy. Also how there is not an equal side to accusing him, seems fishy. They also found evidence of him having paid bots to incite hate against her. It's he-said she-said situation. She's not using this for internet clout and is going about her life. The fact that she is inexperienced and he knew that is why this is even being given the time of day. A white male coming after a Latina because he's mad that she fell for him? love and assault are 2 different things. He wants to benefit from this as much as possible. Sounds like since now people have gained sympathy for effeminate males, women are even more shit on and now that people want equality, women are treated the same when they don't have the same motives to men and men women do. Women wat power yadda yes but women are the ones who get drunk and coersed. Men can too, but what would a women's motive be for that? What does she gain? Nothing. That's why men do it more. People will feel bad for him because he expects ppl to view him that way, which is why everyone is playing right into his hands. He just wants money power and clout. I commend sienna for being strong and not giving the responses he wants. Sienna being in Hawaii is great. Because as a local they absolutely hate white ppl and especially white males. We call them "Haole". She also passes as local. Nobody cares about mainland stuff on tiktok. Most of the island isn't even aware of the app. She's living her best life and none of this matters. He wants to drag her because he can't go be himself.

[@hf3023]

@@misha5570 Equality is about being treated equally regardless of the intentions. It doesn't matter it someone has "good intentions" if they break boundaries that is something to apologize for. Especially if someone has expressed concern about it. Her apologies are completely putting everything on him. If you hurt someone's feelings without intending to, you apologize. So because we are women we should not have to apologize if intend no harm? What bs

[@fullsun1508]

@@misha5570 the way you’re being a warrior for her when you don’t even know her irl 🤡🤡 clown behaviour love clown behaviour

[@maria-ih4vx]

seriously wanted to punch sienna during the whole time but that part using her ethnicity which is like 25% latina as an excuse to why jack was accusing her of a/s him is so much bullsh!t , like wtf does that have to do with anything , she tried to pulled every card on the table to excuse herself omfg

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Latina is not, in fact, an ethnicity

[@jessehernandez4347]

Idk I’d argue it is because it’s sometimes interchangeable with being Hispanic and Hispanic is not a race it is an ethnicity you can even look at consensus or general questions and it asks if you’re Hispanic/latino or not Hispanic/latino under ethnicities. When a female Is physically asked this they’re not gonna be like oh well I’m latino bc that’s not the female version they’re going to say latina. But then again I could be wrong

[@maria-ih4vx]

@@SilverstreamPJ28 yes is it's , ethnicity is about culture , history , mix of others facts and yes apperance too but not necessarily race , when ppl say she isn't white just cause she is latina is wrong cause latinx is an ethnicity and race is not an synonym of it , if that's what you were trying to say

[@m.josena4485]

@@SilverstreamPJ28 it is, in fact an ethnicity not a race

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

@@jessehernandez4347 hispanic is a nationality, it's related to being from Spain or descending from it. Aka all of Latin America. I'm literally Latina, I know what I'm talking about (an actual Latina, born, raised and living in Latin America)

[@elisechiari3103]

Is it just me or should we should be harsher on Sienna? Like no, even if she apologized adequately, she still shouldn’t be forgiven. Sexual assault is absolutely disgusting and horrific

[@aquaplush7531]

Absolutely. If the roles were reversed in that situation, what do you think would’ve happened? Double standards.

[@aquaplush7531]

@sewer~rat But she’s a woman so it’s automatically okay! Man I hate the internet

[@mike-mz6yz]

yeah but thats how the world works....if a 16 year old boy has an affair with a 30 year old teacher people think the boy is cool and wish it would have happened to them if the genders are reversed people are disgusted. Its not right but its how people naturally react to these things. maybe because most men look at it and think "well id be fine if a hot girl wanted to do that to me" or something so dont get as emotional and a lot of women are used to being the ones saying yes or no and controlling when intimate moments happen. If a guy goes to his friends and says I was near passed out drunk and I think a girl had sex with me his friends would probably congratulate him, maybe even stopping him from complaining about it.

[@lariann362]

I totally agree. We need to show men that it's okay to speak up. I don't understand why the severity of the situation changes when the roles are reversed. A man would go to jail for this so why aren't we expecting the same of a woman

[@valeria_sue777]

​​@@aquaplush7531 tbh if the roles were reversed, she'd get more supporters and people would be more ACTIVE to harass him!🙃 More than 90% of male perpetrators in sex crimes received some kind of support/compensation after their victims spoken up, let alone get away with what they did. Whilst the ratio of female victims is 1 in 6 _(as reported)_ , so that means lots of female victims didn't receive the treatment that they should have received, as you think we do. I get the point what you're _trying_ to make, but that's kinda dismissive to the reality that women are living in😬

[@CozyRi]

to research victims of SA so she can “grow as a person” instead of facing her actions is so sociopathic. i feel so bad for jack, she denies she was ever in the wrong yet tries to say she wants to be an ally for survivors. if she was a true ally she wouldn’t be dismissing jacks trauma because she can’t admit to herself what she did.

[@bumblerbree]

also the way she phrases it is like saying 'jack isn't a real victim and his experiences aren't valid, but i looked up some people with actual trauma and i feel bad for those people' - you're definitely not an ally if you gaslight and deny a person's experience and trauma because it makes you look bad.

[@amyb0621]

“He’s pretty toxic, one time he even tried to defend my honor.” Hardin could never

[@armellebiampamba4257]

Only the real ones get this joke🤣

[@melon06h]

Sienna is literally admitting to what she did by saying "I'm only 17, I do dumb stuff". She knows 17 year olds do dumb stuff, she's self aware!

[@ishish8816]

14:58 Dylan covered that point in the video

[@Pumpkin0_0]

Teens do dumb stuff, yes, but harming others, especially when they're told to stop, is a personality issue. Otherwise every teenager would be a piece of shit and every grown adult would be a stand up citizen, and that's entirely false. What she's basically doing is teaching teens that it's just fine to hurt others however they want while they're still young and hide behind their age.

[@mike90317]

Acting like when people turn 18, they receive a download of knowledge about right and wrong.

[@farlonmuentes6004]

@@mike90317 it's a DLC you receive when you're 18 then the next one is 21 when you receive your id so you can drink 😂🤣

[@mike90317]

@@farlonmuentes6004 🤣🍻

[@monikavelikova113]

No matter the age people are, they should know what “no” and boundaries are. I have a little brother and constantly talk to him about why it’s not okay to do some stuff and why if he doesn’t have consent to hug or be touchy, he shouldn’t do it because he is going to make the people uncomfortable. I am also an 18 year old girl, but I know since I was little that if I do something to make someone uncomfortable that I need to be prepared to face the consequences and to stomp on my ego and go apologise for my action. If someone wants to find a reason or excuse, they are always going to find one, Btw love the action figurine, hope you are good and safe! Love you Dylan ❤️

[@arizonaphied5427]

Exactly what I was going to say! Children and even pets can understand the word "no", so can a 17-year-old girl.

[@wyterabitt2149]

Something has gone wrong with the world, and people have become disturbed to the extreme, if a child looking for a hug has to wait for permission and it would be some kind of assault if they just came up and gave one.

[@TheQueen-sw4th]

@@wyterabitt2149 That's not the point. You use hug as an example for little kids because they don't know about sex (although I think they should be educated on gr00ming) so they won't know what you mean by "touching someone without consent" is unless you explain that it's not all forms of physical touch

[@Chris-pk6ot]

I understand you and @The Queen both have nothing but good intentions, but that poor kid is going to have so much confusion, hesitation, and lack of confidence when it comes to actual positive, consensual sexual experiences when he's older, because he's having uncertainty about whether what he's doing being right or wrong during physical interactions with the opposite sex drilled into his head at a time where it's confusing to him. If you trust your brother, maybe trust his instincts and moral sense of right and wrong in those situations and guide him when needed rather than assuming the worst of him and constantly projecting it onto his subconscious at a tender age, where things drastically shape the person he becomes for the rest of his life. As an older sibling you should teach your brother to never hit a woman, step up and protect women when he sees them being victimized, and to not be a creep himself, but don't fuck up his confidence as a young man or he will have immense issues with his self esteem, relationships, mental health, and overall quality of life for possibly the rest of his life. Let me ask one question- how attracted have you been to the stuttering, nervous, unsure men you've dated/ had sex with who were too hesitant to take control, lead the interaction, and act with confidence and self-assuredness? I bet you weren't crazy about them. Sexual polarity (masculine vs. feminine nature - doesn't mean man vs. woman. Homosexual relationships generally have a top/ bottom, a more masculine person and a more feminine person - it's more of an energy or way you carry yourself than your gender) is important to relationships and attraction, and that's becoming an ever growing problem for men these days. Weak men who second guess everything they do (especially in their relationships with women) are not happy, get taken advantage of, and disrespected. I don't want that to be your brother, and neither do you! Just remember building his confidence AND character/ morals is vital at that age. It's absolutely none of my business at the end of the day, so that's my 2 cents, youtube thesis paper over lol.

[@user-vy2hz6fl6x]

@@Chris-pk6ot you’re assuming a lot

[@parycartoons6840]

"I apologize if.." "I'm sorry you feel that way but...," Same energy. I'm gonna stop you right there, no.

[@Peechbubbletea]

I read it and it was CLEAR that she just avoids accountability

[@Creepymusic782]

No teenage boy would get away with the age card for SA, she shouldn’t either like wtf why does she keep saying that XD sending my empathy to the guy that’s all I gotta say Edit: yeah your right a lot of rich white boys or in some countries just rich boys who “shouldn’t have their life ruined because they’re so young” do use the age card and get away with it. Edit: tbh I was wrong in saying that. I think you guys are right that men get away with it because of the notion of age. However, I wrote that when thinking about what would happen if it was the other way around for these two. With social media it’s different than the criminal justice system.

[@christianevrye]

I would argue that many teenage, particularly white, boys do get away with that, but yeah NO ONE should

[@thelittleunicorn6196]

@@christianevrye i agree!!!

[@jadentw7669]

MANY boys get away with it especially white ones but i agree that no one should

[@aki9059]

many boys actually do lol

[@roselynwood5091]

I feel like her gender hasn’t affected anything at all honestly

[@amaa9202]

Seeing Dylan so excited about his 'action' figure is incredibly heartwarming

[@Onlyciii]

I have no remorse for Sienna as a 17 year old and she was practically begging for people to take it lightly because of her age.

[@saraleigh92]

You don’t need to be an ally, just don’t be an abuser 👏👏

[@valentinafangirling]

To be fair on the unforgivable part, i’m pretty sure the accusations are that she touched him while he was unconscious and intoxicated, AND has broken into the bathroom while he’s naked. That’s a lot more than just boundaries. It is unforgivable tbh. Up to Jack to decide that, but its a lot more than just crossing boundaries when it comes to touching and seeing someone naked without consent.

[@hannahcpenner]

TWO Dylan videos in one day?? I'm not complaining

[@c.harlotte]

This is the Ooga Booga channel, who is this Dylan person you speak of?

[@nswang]

today is a great day to be a Troublemaker

[@nswang]

@@c.harlotte this is the second channel of DylanIsInTrouble

[@angelic..9906]

@@nswang babes they know...

[@Remarkable269]

Same 🤟

[@ve.625]

if she got the growth she says she has then she would take actual, full responsibility and give a real and unconditional apology. not try and wiggle (ig) out of what she did in like 3 different ways. she’s the big, mature 18yr girl old who got growth right? then she needs to accept the consequences

[@sachahut2226]

i think sienna’s article is monetized so it’s best if it gets as least clicks as possible. she probably already made a lot of money on it which is literally so wrong but yk.. what can we do

[@bubbybets9336]

i am 17. i would never sa someone or break their boundaries, ESPECIALLY if they told me something i did made them uncomfortable. age is never an excuse to abuse someone

[@Haleyh629]

TLDR: Human trafficking is real and a huge issue and the fetishization of specific ethnicities puts women and girls in those ethnicities at a higher risk. That’s why the author pointed out the Barney thing. The thing with Barney is “problematic” (and I use that term cautiously) because it fetishizes Asian and Lebanese women. This could be seen as an issue because exoticism already puts Asian women at a much higher risk for trafficking, and the same can be said for Lebanese women. Obviously, there are always jokes that don’t age well, but I can understand why the author wanted to point it out as “problematic.”

[@meganlamb7665]

THIS. I was going to say the exact same thing. The other issues the author has with the show aren't problematic but this part is.

[@HouseMDaddict]

Was anyone seeing Barney as a good human in the episode though? I think it's one thing if he was like a main character with great morals and was an upstanding model character with these thoughts, but he's an a-hole and he's meant to come off as a womanizing, fetishizing, and just an overall gross human being right off the bat, before he becomes more palatable throughout the show. Barney isn't James Bond, you know?

[@thisisvoided]

@@HouseMDaddict its played as funny and a joke tho and he isnt criticized for it

[@elthereall]

so many people are saying that barneys is supposed to be problematic and isn’t a good guy but he literally also jokes about getting women drunk to sleep with him and I think the bigger problem is also that guys just like barney watched the show and saw it as a green light to act just like that. also ted acts like that too, all the time, he just doesn’t say things exactly as blunt as barney does and MANY people view ted as the “hero” of the story. and i’m not condemning the whole show because it definitely mad me laugh at times but it was still highly problematic at others

[@aayeshakm8556]

bruh. trafficking is always going to be going on anyways. and like what.. nvm

[@idontdomarigolds]

hey dylan, I just wanted to say, thanks for existing on this planet and helping many of us get through the day with your energy and smile

[@graceh2546]

i often get tired of seeing people call out stuff as problematic when it’s not but dylan’s right. that kinda stuff sells

[@misha5570]

I find it odd that this came out all from Jack's side. An entire youtube apology-style blog about putting personal info about the situation to the internet to gain sympathy. Also how there is not an equal side to accusing him, seems fishy. They also found evidence of him having paid bots to incite hate against her. It's he-said she-said situation. She's not using this for internet clout and is going about her life. The fact that she is inexperienced and he knew that is why this is even being given the time of day. A white male coming after a Latina because he's mad that she fell for him? love and assault are 2 different things. He wants to benefit from this as much as possible. Sounds like since now people have gained sympathy for effeminate males, women are even more shit on and now that people want equality, women are treated the same when they don't have the same motives to men and men women do. Women wat power yadda yes but women are the ones who get drunk and coersed. Men can too, but what would a women's motive be for that? What does she gain? Nothing. That's why men do it more. People will feel bad for him because he expects ppl to view him that way, which is why everyone is playing right into his hands. He just wants money power and clout. I commend sienna for being strong and not giving the responses he wants. Sienna being in Hawaii is great. Because as a local they absolutely hate white ppl and especially white males. We call them "Haole". She also passes as local. Nobody cares about mainland stuff on tiktok. Most of the island isn't even aware of the app. She's living her best life and none of this matters. He wants to drag her because he can't go be himself.

[@naddin5925]

@@misha5570 are you really trying to defend sienna

[@elisechiari3103]

@@misha5570 As a feminist, no. This is a bizarre take. Believe the victims, especially when it’s obvious that Sienna is guilty

[@coolsomeash]

@@misha5570 Wow you just admitted to being a racist and a SA defender. Nice job

[@ellamcgloin4703]

two dylan videos in one day. i cannot handle this.

[@tana3877]

Bet we're not getting anything now for 2 months 😭

[@mamasgirll]

@@tana3877 yup

[@ellamcgloin4703]

@@tana3877 really though

[@harunakirisaki2602]

okay dylan, i love you and i agree with almost everything you said, HOWEVER, the "i have a thing for asian girl, but now i'm more into lebanese" is litterally fetishisation and it is VERY problematic and harmful, especially to us women of colour while played as "normal" or "humour" or deemed as simple "romantic preferences". I know you meant no harm obviously, just wanted to clear this :)

[@hf3023]

@@cryfly1 You obviously feel called out by this. However people are specifically talking about fetishization. Not just simple preferences. You've been all over this forum, we know you like short girls. If you feel the need to defend yourself and your preferences so much perhaps you should look into that.

[@harunakirisaki2602]

@@cryfly1 Well, as you said, the Girls knows you like her as an individual (personnality, etc...) and not just because she is black, you know what i mean ? She's just a great girl, who happens to be black, i'm assuming you didn't date her JUST because she was black right ? In fact fetishization is when you say you like an ethnic group based on harmful stereotypes (ex: i lke asian girls cuz they submissive, i like black girls cuz they wild, latina girls cuz they spicy....) and would date a person sollely because of their origins. It's different than saying i like tall girls, or girls with short hair (etc...) because you don't like tall girls because tall girls are (i'm making smth up rn) submissive in the sheets for instance, you know what i mean ? You just prefer a tall girl, because she's tall (and that doesn't mean you'd date her sollely for that), whereas when Barnie said he liked Asian girls but know he's into Lebanese ones or whatever, it feels REALLY fetishy, as he's probs gonna date/hookup with a girl only for that, and that's harmful

[@makyiaheastman6951]

@@cryfly1 yes, it is problematic and absurd to say you wouldn’t date someone because of their race and it is not a PREFERENCE, it’s being racist. having a preference for someone with short hair is not an issue because anyone can have short hair. you said that you dated someone not BECAUSE of their race but who they are as a person. that is not the issue. it’s when someone doesn’t date someone because of their race or when someone dates someone ONLY because of their race. you see this often in white women- black men couples. where white women will date any black man because they want a “lightskin, mixed race, light eye baby”. that is called fetishizing black men. the issue within that is because you only want what they can give you and not their actual qualities. this also leads to other problems, but that’s another topic.

[@hf3023]

@@cryfly1 I never said you didn't have the right to. It was my personal opinion that you were deliberately ignoring people's answers and the context of the situation. Please tell me how I am gaslighting you. You posted on two comments but posted numerous times. That is a matter of perspective of that saying. People can share their opinions, you just seemed to get very heated in defending your preferences. If you don't believe your fetishing anyone you should have no problem. People have been talking about fetishization the entire time but you continue to ignore and believe people are coming after preferences.

[@hf3023]

@@cryfly1 I never had an argument lmao. I had an opinion the same as you with just as much right to express it bud

[@jjjj-jd2jk]

the only thing i disagree with in this is dylan saying she hasn’t done anything unforgivable. as someone who watched jacks video fully through and who wholeheartedly believes every word he said, sienna should be in jail. jack gave her all the chances in the world and she repeatedly continued to assault him

[@wawaicedcoffee]

To forgive someone doesnt mean to withhold consequences. I obviously won’t speak on Jack’s behalf, it’s up to him if he forgives her or not, but him forgiving her would not mean “and therefore she now doesn’t have to deal with the consequences of what she did.” I know people who have forgiven murderers of their loved ones - but that doesn’t mean that person didn’t also have to go to prison and live up to what they did

[@kphoria1009]

i think he means in the court of public opinion, like lots of internet stars have kept their following after doing similar stuff

[@sobhi1653]

@@kphoria1009 yeah

[@naomipark2882]

For Barney’s (i think that’s his name) comment, i can understand why it’s problematic bc there’s a fetishization of Asian women that causes a lot of harm to them (sexual harassment, assault, etc.)

[@stupid4parx_]

Yes, exactly

[@forthechicana3815]

yeah, that was my thought process as well

[@daisyyli]

im wondering why he said "half asian" instead of just "asians". I may be reaching here but from my experience as an east asian its probably because wasians have the good features of being asian, without looking "too asian" because they're also white and fit their western beauty standards more, while simultaniously still looking "exotic". Very much plays into fetisiation and overall disgusting behaviour if that's what the shows writer intended.

[@brookb5890]

I agree that what Barney said is problematic, but I think that was the point of the line. It was a quick way to explain to the audience just what a douche Barney is. That was kind of my issue with the whole article. Everything the author pointed out as being "bad" is like "yeah... it was supposed to be... because that was the point".

[@Lalaloeps]

It’s interesting how people who haven’t actually seen the whole HIMYM comment how problematic Barney is as if the whole community and the writers don’t know it themselves. Guys, that’s the whole point. He’s been painted to be an awful person from the get go. This is like You and how the actor kept reminding the viewers that Joe is a literal red flag and no one should actually put up with a person with that mindset. The show is portraying these characters so blatantly so people would see it clearly. As simple as that.

[@StilesHale.]

TWICE IN A DAY YOU'RE FEEDING US TODAY

[@livialiu3365]

It's so sad to see a literal teenager abusing a friend and being conscious enough to try and defend herself in the most manipulative way. I've also liked a friend who didn't like me back but I didn't abuse them because though I too was 17 I knew not to kiss someone who's unconscious.

[@madilyngale1706]

Aww back when we thought this was the worst apology on KZbin 🥹 We were so young and naïve 😔

[@shanah9559]

I would still say that having a thing for “half-asian girls” or “Lebanese girls” is highly problematic. Its reeks of fetishizing and objectification based on race and gender. Its like that type of person is an ice cream flavor that is your favorite for the month. Idk if that makes sense but that’s why I think its an issue

[@memethingz6004]

Literally this guy sounds so creepy and the fact that he thinks he has the authority to decide what is harmful to woc & what isn’t …

[@user-ru8ke8df9i]

Thank you! Like I’ve stayed with dylan since the beginning of Dylan will not participate but every time he opens his mouth up about issues of race and sexism I wish he would shut it back up so I can continue liking him.

[@kittycoutourxxx2706]

Barney’s whole personality is that he fetishizes and objectifies women. That’s what he’s saying. Barney’s not a good person. He’s not a hero because he’s just a morally gray character and that’s his whole point. His character is a caricature of men like that.

[@mash7433]

@@kittycoutourxxx2706 but it is problematic.

[@meow4264]

YES thank you! I like Dylan but man everytime he speaks on sexism or racism I'm like ohhhh no that is not it my guy. Hopefully he sees comments like yours though and continues learning! 😊

[@littlejvalkyria6149]

Is it just me that automatically likes Dylan’s videos before even watching them? 😂 I just love this guy too much 👌🏻 thanks for the amazing content you constantly give us💛✌🏻

[@idontdomarigolds]

I write comments saying that I love the video before even starting the video because I am dead confident I will love and enjoy it so.. I feel you my friend

[@LevePalestinaKrossaSionismen]

Wholeheartedly agreed, because Dylan deserves the like, especially after *TWO* uploads today! 🙏🏼

[@goldenageofdinosaurs7192]

The first thing I do is hit the like button, usually before the video even starts playing..

[@mirzadakobilic6440]

Same here 😂

[@daisyyli]

he's never made a bad video ever

[@stupid4parx_]

I agree that the writer of the article about how I met your mother didn't bring up any good points, HOWEVER even though I love the show and both of these characters, Barney and Ted are actually both really problematic, especially Barney. You don't see it as much in the first and last episodes, but mid show Barney does a shit ton of creepy stuff to woman, to name a few: he consistently relies on at best very dubious consent, but probably more accurately date r*, and always talks about how his favorite type of girl are drunk, no friends, vulnerable, and ones who have been abused by their fathers or previous boyfriends. He even admits to having had dealings with sex traffickers. Ted is not as bad as bad as Barney obviously, but he's also pretty emotionally manipulative. Both of them also make a ton of transphobic and homophobic comments.

[@tiffanykim2773]

They were meant to be that way tho who wants a show were all the characters are fake.......I mean good?

[@cha6258]

It’s been a while since I watched how I met your mother, but that comment reminds me so much of me rewatching friends and thinking how problematic Ross (especially but not exclusively ) is !

[@stupid4parx_]

@@tiffanykim2773 Barney was meant to be like that, although not in way where the show genuinely thought it was wrong, it was more like a quirky trait. I don't think Ted was intentional though.

[@ActuallyAnanya]

There's this popular theory that Ted was majorly exaggerating how awful Barney was to make himself look better by comparison (which is a very Ted kind of thing to do, so I buy it). He had already been proven to be an unreliable narrator at several points in the series so it checks out.

[@stupid4parx_]

@@ActuallyAnanya yeah I've seen somebody talk about that on TikTok. I think it's a great theory and I could totally buy that in-universe, but I don't see the writers having intended that

[@loveyhope]

Okay she's young but I'm the same age and I know that's its not okay to invade and ignore boundaries when someone sets them up and I know that touching a person in such a way is SA and wrong... there really is no excuse. As women we are exposed to things about SA early on. I know some carry this idea that you can't SA a guy because they are "stronger" which is just dumb and fuxking stupid. We are teens we know its wrong. She just doesn't want to take accountability. I was SA'd when i was a child and when you realize what truly happened to you there is so much guilt and shame, you think you are the one at fault... I just can't comprehend how she can think anything like that is okay.

[@sabahk]

yeah plus he made it clear in his video that he didnt want to use physical force against her because he thought they were friends and didn't want to hurt her. Honestly, that says a lot about his character. I think I would've punched her at that point

[@loveyhope]

@@sabahk Exactly! Not to mention that if he were to use physical force I have no doubt she would take those instances and turn it against him claiming she's a victim.

[@olive-gy2rt]

exactly. i don’t know why she decided to go for the “i’m only 17” path. i’m 17 too, we aren’t 10 year olds with no sense of boundaries

[@loveyhope]

@@olive-gy2rt Indeed we are at the developmental stage where we understand such things... her age is no excuse. Being a dumb and reckless teenager is completely disconnected from things such sa.

[@olive-gy2rt]

@@loveyhope yeah it’s so stupid to use that as a pathway for sympathy as if there aren’t other 17 year olds who can see through the hullshit

[@Shippo28]

Being young is no excuse to what she did, she was 17. She knew what she was doing, when I was that age I didn't do stupid shit. She's a horrible person that needs to be removed from all of her social media platforms and should be in jail for the SA

[@honeycatacomb1191]

"we have to differentiate when someone does some one does something like a little unsavory and something that's problematic" so beautifully put!!!!

[@r.d826]

Can you be my English teacher? The way you analyze this text is incredible. Thank you for bringing this situation to us !

[@sameeha2621]

IKR sometimes I forget how smart Dylan is. Are we sure his college was a scam?? 🤔

[@MiliDoesntDillyDally]

This feels surreal. Watching Dylan grow from his first car movie commentary to launching a tiny version of his tall and brilliant self.

[@arianna155]

take a shot every time sienna mentions her age

[@akirahatson2593]

We're gonna die😂😂

[@sameeha2621]

*dies of alcohol poisoning*

[@user-mh8uf4ub4w]

i blacked out

[@alba279]

You're really insightful and empathic...have you done therapy? Haven't really met many guys that could read situations so well and express their opinions so eloquently. Kudos to your parents or to your life or whatever made you this way. We need more of this.

[@sierravreacts]

this is so real

[@ilovecheetahs7]

I have never seen anyone who is so blatantly aware of what they have done wrong, doing their utmost to make it seem like they don’t. That essay was so coldly calculated to try and generate sympathy in every possible way that it is impossible that she does not understand how wrong her behaviour was. It is so manipulative, and the only thing Sienna regrets in this entire situation is the effect it has had on her career. What’s worse is that the adults who surround her are enabling this behaviour. It actually is - as that Buzzfeed writer would say - chilling.

[@CosimasNiehaus]

Dylan, as a mixed race woman who has had many a fetishising comment said about me, like I’m some future “unlocked achievement” in their sex life, I can say that the Barney fetishisation thing IS problematic. Something doesn’t have to be said negatively about a race to be problematic

[@tiffanykim2773]

Oh dear yes it is but what isn't these days sadly? But the show came out forever ago and we've established that it wouldn't survive today and it was just a show which showed real assholes which is what Barney was but still let it go

[@ashleyisonabudget]

the "unlocked achievement" makes me feel SEEN! I am not mixed, however, I am black and went to a mainly all white school. The guys who wanted to sleep with me just because I was black, like they were gonna win an award was disgusting. I'll be 30 in July, and that s**t still makes my skin crawl

[@Rainberri]

I feel like you think he thinks it really isn't a problem... it's not that it isn't a problem but more so that the character was written to be gross, with all his morality lines blurred... So that kind of behaviour is expected of that character and he's written specifically that way to provoke that emotion. Idk if I'm making sense, but I hope this helps you to get what he meant better. I'm also really sorry you have to experience that.

[@faithf5542]

@@Rainberri That’s not what he said. Dylan gave an example of what he believed was actually problematic to imply that the initial statement isn’t problematic. He completely missed that fetishization is a problem, he said it was douchy but not an actual problem which is why people are speaking up. He quite literally said “Is it problematic? No!“ in the video. You’re making excuses for him.

[@user-bt7us9dx8d]

Thank you for this 👏🏾

[@ellepatrick]

you’re videos are always the best part of my day

[@seeratdhillon6350]

whenever Dylan posts, I’m slightly less depressed

[@angelabytyci8812]

me too

[@eb1234]

Okay, first time watching this guy. Forgot my phone was connected to my speaker and ooooGAA booooGAAA blasts and I go into cardiac arrest

[@lovebug3261]

I love Dylan’s personality, intelligence, and sense of humor. They were all shown in this video and I loved it

[@ivelisseruizpabon9194]

Also she posted a lot of TikToks when they were still “friends” with captions like “I can’t stop touching Jack even tho he hates it”. And she gaslight him so much. Also Sienna is NOT a woman of color. She’s just in the beach every damn day and she has a tan, but her skin is naturally white as hell. And Latina woman? Seriously? Because her great great great great grandfather is Latino she’s latina? She can’t even say hi in Spanish, and she has never embraced her “Latin” culture.

[@maaaan2314]

Yeah...these kinda people only remember their "heritage" when its convenient for them and can 1. Make them money 2. Save them doing some f d up $ hit 3. They can say "their" country is bad and then make money/woke points out of that They're the most annoying type of ppl I'll tell you that! Hasan minhaj is honestly unwatchable due to that reason only...

[@taehofu]

i remember when she was calling herself a spicy latina knowing full well she wasn't

[@ivelisseruizpabon9194]

@@maaaan2314 exactly, she’s holding onto that 2% just because it’s embarrassing for them to be called what they’re, North American (white)

[@amazinchiik]

hahahaha! she can't even say hi in Spanish??? bruh

[@yutisima]

@@amazinchiik can she speak Spanish? no offended i lit don't know

[@blesso5327]

Congrats on the action figure YouTooz!!! That’s exciting and great video Dylan! Always love your content!

[@nadirimyers6643]

The person that SA me I told him how I felt and he genuinely apologized. Of course it still hurt but you know how much weight is taken off of you to know that you not just being crazy. That yes this did happen and they see where they went wrong. That shit is…. A blessing cus ik not everyone gets that. She had the opportunity to actually learn something and actually move on a be better cus they were young and sometimes when you younger you don’t think guys have feels like that tbh but instead of actually apologizing you keep doubling down… that’s not a good sign for the person you’d be in the future in my opinion. I’m sorry IF I made you uncomfortable . He made a whole video basically crying saying you DID. No if needed

[@nohemigomez9338]

She is one of those people that can’t understand why someone doesn’t like them bc they have always been liked and praised by their looks. “I can convince him to love me” mentality.

[@Hannah-gc4cy]

I really enjoyed hearing your take on the Sienna situation. You pointed out a lot of things that I didn't even notice, like we knew she was manipulative but her word choice is actually NUTS. I like that you try and give her the benefit of the doubt, but you're right, she's way smarter than she let's on. Love your mind and your videos, Dylan!🌹

[@7Angelxoxo]

This is probably one of the best videos that have been made on the sienna mae and jack wright situation even aside from that, this was a truly enjoyable video that i agreed a whole lot with.

[@misquared1421]

3:31 ok but fetishization is also an issue, you don't have to be 100% overtly racist for it to be a problem. It is weird and gross sounding and yes, a little racist. it's what we like to call misogynoir. the intersection of racism and sexism, specifically for black women but it applies to other Women of color as well. it's pretty harmful too, cause sexism already treats woman as objects but then their race adds or subtracts from the value of said "object". BUT! the writer if the article is [REDACTED] cause is just like "Doi he mentioned a girl's race? must be problematic doi di doi doy doy" with no depth or critical thinking. I'll bet you she's a [REDACTED].

[@fashionablyunstablee]

here after colleens “apology” video and she somehow topped this one off 💀

[@Lizzi656]

This was a really well articulated take of not only this specific problem, but the bigger issues with how situations can be heavily misconstrued by people's words and how people can lose sight of the main issue by using descriptions in their(or their client's) defense. Thank you for also pointing out things like a) just because someone doesn't go to the police doesn't mean they didn't do it and b) anyone can be a victim of SA

[@HM98.]

Man THANK YOU for being you honestly! So glad to hear that rant going on inside my brain coming from someone else, it's just so comforting..

[@AnnikaAvenue]

Dylan, PLEASE watch Psychology in Seattle's reaction to Jack Wright's video. I think it will help you understand the gravity of the situation and not dismiss it as "just crossing some boundaries that made him uncomfortable"

[@Bluecupcake122]

right

[@slsthewriter1299]

It's definitely interesting how people don't understand why stories have problematic elements. It's because it's interesting. It's because, in the realm of fiction, we can explore things that we wouldn't otherwise explore. The key is to do it in a way where it's, you know, interesting but also not glorifying stuff (like toxic relationships, for example), _especially_ in works that are aimed at a younger audience because, to be honest, a lot of those shows are made to be lessons. They'll beat the message in (while not talking down to the audience if the show is good). But there's a time when people graduate from stories teaching you a lesson to stories that just explore. The problem comes comes down to people not recognizing when a story's purpose. For one, I think it's because a lot of media is, frankly, not written by people who know what they're doing. Two, too many shows and the like talk down to the audience and treat them like they don't know any better, largely because of the first point. This is especially harmful in more adult shows because it doesn't allow the audience to think for themselves. Three, people aren't taught to comprehensively digest media anymore. Twitter is a huge example of that; either people can't grasp what is being said at all, or people reach and accuse the writer for something that wasn't said (i.e. someone making a post about pancakes, only pancakes, and somebody screams at them for hating waffles when the post had nothing to say on waffles). You mash all of these together, and you get a story that doesn't know how to tell a story that explores and/or teaches a lesson, and then an audience who doesn't know how to consume it. And in some cases, the people who don't know how to consume it get used to taking everything at face-value because they've been talked down to. So you get people who think this thing in a toxic relationship is good, actually, when in reality, it is most *definitely not.* In other cases, you get people who can't enjoy any story because they don't understand why people would want to explore interesting, though problematic, topics. So in short. I'm sick and tired. Lol

[@justbored-_-4805]

I read your whole post because it was a really interesting verbalisation of something I feel and agree with but have never put into words. Then I got to the last line of "so in short, I'm sick & tired" and yh, that sums it up pretty well lol Your comment really did explain my feelings perfectly though 👏👏

[@vaishnavisingh9244]

Ugh thank you, you put into words what I feel all the time. People going on and on about how cerain people in the main roles were toxic/stupid/hateful, but don't realise that they were meant to be that way for a reason. Also, people need to learn to distinguish fiction to reality. Just like shows about patriotism don't make people join the army unless the intention was always there, same way a show showing a shitty character doesn't make people be shitty in real life unless the intention was always there.

[@magikphoenix140]

@@vaishnavisingh9244 THIS.Also them complaining about a main character having flaws like a realistic character should have,but then complain if the character didn’t have any flaws

[@mariannej8529]

As a Lebanese woman myself, I remember being taken aback when i first watched that episode of HIMYM. Fetishizing someone based on their ethnicity IS problematic.

[@CharlieTheChap]

👏👏👏 As someone who has been fetishized often, I was also surprised to hear that. It really is problematic and dehumanizing.

[@JekyllOrHyde]

Dylan literally says that what Barney said was a douchey thing to say. Dylan never excused what Barney said, and if you don’t know what “douchey” means..it means to be obnoxious or contemptible.

[@funkeinthebasement]

@@JekyllOrHyde but he then follows that up by saying it’s not problematic, which isn’t true

[@JekyllOrHyde]

@@funkeinthebasement But he isn't saying that what Barney said was right either

[@Eidolon1andOnly]

What's really problematic is how oversensitive everyone is over a fictional character in a sitcom telling a slightly edgy joke. What real world problems did that one throwaway line actually create? Having hurt feelings over a joke you found in bad taste isn't a real world problem. The term "problematic" has lost most of its meaning due to it's overuse as a feminist buzzword.

[@gallarinas]

what she did is definitely unforgivable

[@MrChichithechihuahua]

thank you for using your platform to encourage people to think for themselves and not be slaves to social media/news you dropped this 👑

[@ziabwn630]

What Barney said was wrong and hurtful because he was fetishizing Asian women. That’s problematic

[@SkullCrusher-xk5wp]

I'm pretty sure he was written to be an icky character though in the beginning so it makes sense. If it were praised or Barney was shown as an uber cool dude, then I'd agree it'd be problematic. But he's not. Context matters.

[@coolsomeash]

@@SkullCrusher-xk5wp Barney the dinosaur?

[@cpilaf]

@@SkullCrusher-xk5wp but it's not like any of the characters call him out for saying it. Also if asian women are saying it's a harmful and gross joke, it's not anyone else's place to speak over them.

[@SkullCrusher-xk5wp]

@@cpilaf i am an asian woman

[@memethingz6004]

It’s dangerous af problematic is not strong enough word for this

[@queencobraclub7202]

Whenever i hear the intro, I cant help feel like we are all in a cult 😂 and I'm cool with it

[@jaimeegreen1847]

One of the things I love so much about you, Dylan, is that you are silly and childish but also so mature and self-aware. We are lucky to have someone like you on this platform and in this world!

[@Sionovar]

Every once in a while, it’s nice to be reminded how incredible Dylan is

[@RIPmichael22]

My thoughts exactly!

[@amybethwalks]

I need a little Dylan so I can sit him on my desk and we can not write our novels together

[@WhoisIzsy]

Two video in one day. You’re treating us Dylan.

[@maggie3842]

The article was a clear fail but the writer was right about one thing: HIMYM was definitely problematic at times I loved the show when I was younger but now I randomly remember stuff that happened on that show and I’m like “wait a minute..”

[@mariannek6735]

Sure but this article was only talking about the pilot episode. A lot of points they mentioned were kinda not toxic enough to write an article about.

[@fridaherbst719]

I'm actually rewatching it right now and thinking a lot about problematic scenes. I'm not trying to defend it, a lot of it is downright sexist and derogartory towards women. But for me it always existed in this kind of parallel universe - I can't describe it any better. Like this is so downright wrong and ridiculous that it seems very hard to compare it with reality, if you know what I mean. I'm not saying it's a good thing to build all your comedy on that very questionable foundation, it's just something I realized for myself.

[@NoThankUBeQuiet]

Yes absolutely. But to point out barney being a problem would be like pointing out barney is purple

[@KateCat420]

@@fridaherbst719 I feel like if you acknowledge something as problematic, it shouldn't always mean you can't enjoy it. Like movies we grew up with didn't all age well, but when the world's a dumpster fire I don't feel like a bad person for having comfort content.

[@dragonfly5665q]

16:34 i don't think that it's fair to say that what she did "wasn't that bad/unforgivable" when Jack literally already made a whole ass video saying how the whole thing affected him in such unimaginable ways. saying that what she did "isn't bad" takes away from the victim's statement as if we (outsiders) would know any better than jack on how bad the whole situation affected him, which doesn't sit well with me.

[@lakshitadidwania2251]

i love how dylan usues drama to fill the empty hole in his life. I LOVE U SO MCUH

[@izzy_3308]

The ‘ooga booga’ intro is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard, I love it

[@ve.625]

two dylan videos in a day, two dylans in this video, thank you universe

[@slay9395]

we should continue calling Dylan ''movie boy'' from now on

[@marianabonina249]

5:41 it’s literally a sitcom from the 2000’s, don’t take it so seriously buzzfeed, what’s next, “friends is sexist because Monica liked to cook”?!

[@aminatatoure8125]

It is problematic for Barney to like a certain type of girl when he is talking about their race/nationality. POC are constantly dealing with fetishization. Just because he is not hating on a specific group does not mean he is not being problematic.

[@idontdomarigolds]

two vids in one day! i feel blessed

[@Maria.43yrs.ago.]

"What's action about it?" Dylan: **backflip** Me: SOLD

[@oldtimeslover1]

i absolutely love your content! how you can talk about serious topics and have very well formed arguments/ideas and at the same time NEVER fail to make me laugh ❤️ thanks for making videos

[@Midknight_Fluff]

12:10 When dylan talked about this part, it resonates so well with the usual I guess “Nice guy” effect, where people think they are the only one entitled to have a say in something when they help this someone… any yes that’s WHY “Nice Guys” finish lasts.

[@atree4487]

Something that always pisses me off are the "apologies" that use if, like Dylan pointed out. It's something someone did to me after a year of trauma (yes, I'm in therapy and doing better). "I'm sorry _if_ anything I did hurt you. I'm sorry _if_ I made you feel unloved," despite knowing damn well that I was upfront and blatantly honest about how I was feeling. Using 'if' in this case is kinda like using 'but' - you're not really apologizing for anything because you're not owing up to the full consequences of your actions. You're mitigating the pressure on your, not actually being sorry.

[@natashaj849]

Thank you for touching upon such a serious topic like this I love this channel.

[@vivien1437]

Thank you Dylan for using your platform for important topics too and making us laugh at the same time

[@ilserenkema4494]

wow two videos in one day?!! how did we get so blessed?

[@armellebiampamba4257]

Hope this opens up a conversation to male SA and abuse. So much of this happens behind the scenes and most of the time, they won't even know its abuse or SA cus they've been told they are supposed to "like" the female attention. Apparently men don't even have a place to go to if they are being abuse by their female partners. If they call into a hotline for the abused, they get sent to the hotline for abusers. It's sick how we deal with male abuse and even if women experience it more, men should have a place to go when their partners are being abusive just as much as women

[@RIPmichael22]

Yes! Thank you and you made this point well and eloquently. It breaks my heart.. men are sexually assaulted all the time!! Poor things just suffer in silence more than anyone will ever know..

[@Randomgirley201]

One of my favorite videos of yours ever. Not so much about Sienna and Jack (I didn't know where they were, but I've known about the situation) but your points of view on taking responsibility, ownership, and growing from it. As well as the fact how Sienna "apologized" in her article. Saying "if" in any apology is never a real apology, especially when you know how the other person feels. That's the same with any situation where someone is wrong and don't actually own up to their mistakes. For the person that is hurt too, it isn't fair and it makes it harder for them heal and move on from situations too. I feel like people most of the time don't apologize because they can't admit to themselves that they are wrong or that they've done wrong and they don't grow from that. Another thing is being the bigger person.I understand that it is hard to be the bigger person, but I've always tried to be the bigger person because that is just the right thing to do and I've never understand why other can't at least try to do the same. It just seems so much more simple to own what you did, apologize and mean it and move on. I love how you addressed all these topics and point of views. More so because you brought up a lot of things I don't think that get talked about on KZbin enough about taking ownership and growing. A lot of these things I've always known and just nice to see someone talk about them. One of the things I love about your content is your perspective and understanding about topics rather if is movies, shows, or ticktock stars. Always great to watch and listen.

[@memethingz6004]

He literally said she SA-ing him is not unforgivable 😐

[@BomiYuuki]

I genuinely don't know who these people are, but I like listening to Dylan talk and how he breaks everything down.