PROVIDER? | The Slumflower Hour podcast

So what's the fuss around dating providers? Why are women scared to date selfishly? Why do we slut-shame women who are upfront about their requirements of men who want to sleep with them, whilst we uphold and celebrate the women who settle 'in the name of love'?
In this episode, join Chidera as she explores the concept of men being providers - and why we shouldn't let 'feminism' stop us from having our own cake and eating it too...just like the men do!
Available to stream on Spotify, Amazon and Apple Podcasts via theslumflowerh...
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[@destinybeard1772]

Finding a smart independent baddie from another independent baddie madam Joyce just shows the right women are in rooms together. Thank you for your content and opening yourself up to the internet

[@iamaku09]

I LOVE how u have been in this game for so long that mass online hysteria doesn’t phase you one bit…you literally just shrugged it off and kept it moving😂

[@khadijaknox2734]

I wish I was listening to you 5 years ago. My life would look complete different. The 💎 you are dropping are much needed. Please don’t stop gifting us these gems!

[@Kayla-kd8ov]

Listen! you are right. but our lives in five years time with this advice

[@justicexaset]

As someone new to sales and learning how to finesse c-suite executives this has been hands down the best sales advice I've ever come across.... Thank you

[@kaysmellsgood]

Omg the snippets of your video with madame Joyce have been trending everywhere even on tiktok and twitter and men and women alike have been ripping their hairs out especially the one about Nigerian men and providers..it's so funny to see 😂😂

[@alexispeterson4439]

The last 13 minutes is just what some of us needed where there are tons of women but few quality men in our environment. The discipline and faith you instill in your messages truly are changing my perspective and keeping me patient while creating my own fun! A must saved episode with so many tips and tricks I will implement ❤

[@hornsby618]

Reminder that while being fat, trans, disabled, etc., are not part of the traditional beauty standard, we fulfill many kinks just by existing and using that to our advantage is key.

[@Got2BOshun]

This was a gold mine. I am sharing it with my daughters

[@Infintekweyol]

Your message about Nigerian men has changed my outlook in life. I will forever give thanks for finding you on my fyp from madam Joyce. From one sistar to another BIG UP YOURSELFFFFFFFF🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 I'm here for it all shake up this space hunnyyyyyyyyy

[@emmanuellaojo8359]

YAY!!! Literally just journaled how grateful I am to come across your content. My deepest thanks for reminding me of my power..from a fellow Nigerian baddie 😝 💛

[@Kayla-kd8ov]

I'm really glad I have found your podcast. I love that you touched on the things that may limit our mindset such as colourism, fatphobia, transphobia, disabilities. I would love if those things could be explored more. I believe that's why many women settle and don't ask for more, because they're scared. They have insecurities. if they ask for more, their guy will confirm their limiting beliefs.

[@SapphireChristella]

Thank you for this beautiful Sunday morning sermon.🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@Acquiredtaste33]

Here from Joyce's podcast. I just really like you and your vibe, period! 🔥

[@sr7407]

Teach us how to flirt SlumFlower!!!!!

[@lleturno]

She shares that on her patreon!

[@GrungeGalactica]

Thanks for the weekly dose of wisdom Goddess ❤ I always have you in my head when I’m around men like “what would Chiddy do?”

[@tinalopa6401]

I kept watching because I don't mind ladies saying they want to date a provider. My only thing is it's potentially dangerous. I support academic feminists because it's about how things should be. The reality is different because our current world doesn't match up with how life would be if everyone was emotionally, financially and physically taken care of. I take your thoughts as coping with what the world has given you. Doesn't make it good for everyone. But I can accept 90% of your expressed views.

[@Infintekweyol]

Sis I'm adding Caribbean men to the list too 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@olikah4667]

42:11 😂😂😂😂 why are you like this?!?!?!

[@khadijaacone830]

we needed this

[@olikah4667]

56:08 😂 you’re part alt; you are stylistically ambiguous

[@WonderfulWorldofMeg]

Thank you!

[@quietecstasy8054]

I wouldn’t call the feminine things a woman naturally provides nothing, but I get what you mean. Not only financial is valuable. You don’t have to be a slave just because someone is providing financially but you both play a part in a relationship. Him having simply emotional support and company is very very valuable & motivates him to do better.

[@jeahluna2385]

your right w the transwoman, theres a market for us some cis women couldnt even grasp we can, we dress better and present ourselves too i got 2 men in my life bf n boyfriend they help. your right w self esteem because i have a friend whos very independent but has done what you said of just letting man use her because she thinks its gross like prostitute when u demand she gave herself for free at work to go on top for career. lol

[@wonderfulwigswomen]

i would say that's true for a lot of men from African countries. For example, I used your advice (played a video maybe 10X) to deal with one from Guinea.

[@kaysmellsgood]

@@wonderfulwigswomen a lot of African men behave the same

[@olikah4667]

If Maya Jama said what u said, no one would say a thing!

[@asmrearthchild3315]

Prosecco please abeg🤣🤣

[@MichaelHamiltonbrockyhammon]

Very pleasant 😃 kip uwp the best version of self you can be

[@sanskritiverma8010]

Me who wants to be like you Also me who hates working on herself.

[@goddess2859]

So you basically said that ballers in Nigeria are attracted to you because of your body, your complexion (in Nigeria) being lighter, and overall your physical appearance, so you are also being objectified….. also, this conversation lacks so much nuance, which is wild considering everything that came out about Diddy. How are we not talking about how men associate money with power and domination and under being provided for at some point your freedom and liberation is restricted? Idk 😭😭😭 being afraid of men with money is a normal response to dating men under patriarchy. Men are terrifying

[@kaysmellsgood]

​@@goddess2859 that's why you never have to be afraid of walking away from a man if it ever gets to that point...also men treat you how you carry yourself or what they see you're willing to tolerate...they know the kind of women they can do that with i.e low self esteem/worth and desperate women...men without money are also terrifying...they become jealous of you especially if you're doing better than them. Generally there's always an atom of objectification of women from men whether you like to admit it or not.. that's just how men are...that's why you must benefit from that situation.

[@ruthanyasi8290]

I love your voice.

[@olikah4667]

I wanna see u in movies, so bad!!!

[@perfectpie6769]

While colorism is a huge thing, girl, can we talk about mother wounds??? What if your mom is light skinned and oblivious to the dynamics at play? What if the self esteem issues with colorism are generational and tied up with your family? That’s a big reason why I don’t date black men at all. I’m traumatized from my family’s colorism.

[@SusanTrishelMonson]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@Snklsn5346]

Until you want to be with that one guy that seems perfect for what you want in your life, but you have already been out here exchanging time and certain levels of access to you because of money and perks. Calm, confident men can be in the same space as you where they act like they are the prize. The amount of single women, with money and looks, just with looks, just with money but no looks, from the states, from France, from literally anywhere in the world available for men to get with because they are only is crazy. My point is, for how long can you play this game? would you be happy to have this relationship with your husband or life partner? If you are ok with possibly being alone in the future or with someone that doesn't really attracts or excits you, follow all her general advice.

[@Kayla-kd8ov]

I don't think you have to take on everything she says. Just take the parts that apply to you and your situation and leave the rest. But she is definitely onto something

[@wonderfulwigswomen]

colorism happens right here on YT