Alexander GRACE (Dating, Attraction, and Emotional Vulnerability)

[@DavidianCrest]

The KZbin collab of the century. I’ve been a fan of you both for awhile and I’m excited 🔥

[@thenarrator1984]

Same

[@larryrobx]

Ditto. This was amazing. More of such collab's with my other fav YT thinkers, please!

[@deanduplessis433]

Could not, not watch this.

[@WojciechowskaAnna]

yeah, two misogynistic men. Does any of them even have a successful family or relationship of more than 5 years to demonstrate they have any clue? Where are the girlfirends/wives telling - yes - listen to those guys?

[@deanduplessis433]

@@WojciechowskaAnna Sorry to inform you, but Alexander is happily married with a daughter and Orion is in a long term committed relationship. Both are simply protecting their relationships from the public space and people like you. I feel very sad for you and I hope that you watched this video all the way through and that 1% of it sunk in. They are quite literally preaching happiness for everyone and it might be this message that you are rejecting?

[@elainelee4828]

“A healthy relationship is calm and peaceful with a seemingly boring undertone”. Yes, I cannot agree with Grace more. “This person is so boring”, take it as a good sign.

[@rafaeldeleon225]

Take it as peace.

[@Underachiever_Files]

Yeah, but we get thrown down for the IG roster when the relationship is like that. Not complaining, i did it myself many, many years ago as well.

[@xGCPiE4SaQ0Lbc]

And familiarity breeds contempt.

[@colincann9752]

@@xGCPiE4SaQ0Lbc this.. very much this.

[@kellygreenii]

Exactly. It means you are in relationship with someone of sound character. People of good character act with integrity. Move according to principles rather than pure desire or self-interest. Which makes them predictable. They do what they say. They say what they mean, and they are consistent. If you want “excitement” you are basically selecting for people who either have poor character or are mentally ill.

[@robwozniak9912]

I'm glad they brought up grief and the death of a dream. I was prone to believe in the fairy tale of romantic love and it's cost me a lot of good years.

[@renaldsunset]

Same ! I call it my Boys 2 Men phase. Begging for romance like a little..

[@MrPaddy1999]

In what do you believe now in terms of relationships?

[@DamianSzajnowski]

​@@renaldsunset... boi

[@AdrienMelody]

Same, it took me three awful heartbreaks and five years of denial to finally wake up to the reality of women and relationships 😅

[@StrongBodymindandspirit]

What do y’all mean by this?

[@kashemvai5025]

This is not the collaboration we deserved, but the collaboration we needed NOW!

[@HectorChafloque]

That's right, we need more of this. Thanks.

[@satepestage3599]

Haha😂❤

[@mremington8]

why don't we deserve it?

[@satepestage3599]

@@mremington8 It's a movie reference to the dark knight (batman)

[@nightmareTomek]

@@satepestage3599 everything has to be a meme....

[@KJ-pu8dw]

Only ever found bad therapists. I have found KZbin guys like these two more useful for my personal growth.

[@VaronPlateando]

that former goes especially with cptsd and alike. and yes, I do doubt as well that xx.s thrpst.s can be helpful for gents' issues. due to (limited) themselves and as projective instance | screen for the gents' life experiential residues.

[@ggus1991]

I'm among the many people that have been positively impacted by the content created by these two men. Thanks for sharing your ideas with us and helping people transform their lives!

[@psychacks]

I was thrilled to be able to sit down recently with Alexander Grace, whose balanced and research-backed analyses on intersexual dynamics I've admired for years. It turns out we have a lot in common! In this deep dive, we discuss a number of topics in our respective wheelhouses, including: the hopelessness of the black pill, the attraction of emotional wounding, and the role of emotional vulnerability in relationships. I hope you enjoy the talk. Follow Alexander on KZbin: www.youtube.com/@alexandergrace5350 Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaO7c62HZ613e7M Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #alexandergrace #relationship

[@AndreAngelantoni]

Great collaboration! Which book by Yalom? I see two of them: The Theory and Practice of Group Therapy The Gift of Therapy: An Open Letter to a New Generation of Therapists and Their Patients

[@nightmareTomek]

I kinda doubt one of these channels will change anything. I'm MGTOW. I think the woman I would love to have simply DOES NOT EXIST. It's like telling men to look for the great pirate treasure.

[@nightmareTomek]

Well, I know where their problem is. At around 30:00 they go off the rails and imply that everyone not succeeding or not wanting a relationship is emotionally damaged (childhood trauma) and expects their partner to heal them. This is simply not true and that's why their advice is very, very limited. I see why the red-pill community is disagreeing.

[@schroederluck7984]

Alex’s exchange with Orion where he disagreed with Orion and then talked it through with him to find some common ground really highlighted these two’s intelligence and character. I especially appreciated how Alex was charitable in his counterpoints, as he did his best to clarify Orion’s position in his own words so as to not misrepresent Orion’s position. Awesome talk guys, your insight is very much appreciated!

[@donpcmartin]

They both navigated a very delicate issue very well. Respect for how well they both handled apparent disagreements

[@nightmareTomek]

They already said in the beginning they share a mindset. This won't change much. xD I wonder about a collab with someone who strongly opposes their views, like maybe Sandman (and I don't like Sandman very much, he puts all women in a box, he's very negative and then he's right about a lot of things...). Well, I have given up on women. I wonder if any of these 2 channels will change anything with me. I'm binge-watching Psychacks and already downvoting the most. "How to get any man", just dating advice masquerading as societal knowledge. Just another man trying to solve a problem that doesn't want to be solved.

[@liamcampbell9087]

Because he doesn't validate your doomer mindset?@@nightmareTomek

[@nightmareTomek]

​@@liamcampbell9087 Ex-fking-actly. Instead he validates your simpy little pea brain. What annoys me with channels like these and their herds of simps is how they gloss over some of the harmful things happening in society, they indirectly promote closing your eyes against it and just get a partner, just because. And the herds of simps of course agree since they wanna defend pussy. Do you think these issues wil get solved this way? You really think that? 9:50 "red pill stuff is phrased to be largely alienating to anyone outside red pill". means, phrase it in a way so those easily offended victims don't get offended, best to not point out they've been doing something wrong at all.

[@jamesholster5323]

​@@nightmareTomek"does not want to be solved" is false. This is one of the great issues of our time and it begs a solution. True, most women who want a solution lack the capacity to reflect. But it is what it is.

[@ronmexico5908]

It's nice to finally see a psychologist speak on relationships and the state of dating

[@thenarrator1984]

There's quite a few but mostly.women. hard for men in the state of things

[@jamesredman1263]

I'm glad Alexander has the woman who can hear his vulnerability empathetically. 99% of us do not. And we have no clue where the 10 other women who are like that exist. Compared to Alexander, many, and I mean MANY of us have had the experience of letting our dearly beloved see the slightest "weakness" in us and it was thrown in our face with great force forever after.

[@samroche5140]

Forgive them, for they know not what they do

[@VaronPlateando]

@@samroche5140 or rather forget them (xx.s) - as they won't learn either. or just maybe try to use and attach differently. for a time being.

[@jamesredman1263]

@@ApexAL - I don't know how that shakes out, but my former wife was very religious in her way. We met on the steps of the church. But in her case, once hitched, she went from passionate and supportive to narrowminded and judgemental. One by one, all forms of sexuality were deemed offensive to God except for making babies. No we weren't Catholic. Some of my library and most of my record collection was burned while I was at work, because they didn't meet her personal religious standards. There's a lot more, but that much gives the idea: her use of religion did not make her a more respectful or loving wife. So I'm inclined to believe it is a very individual matter. Right now, I'd love to be with a positive lady, but not optimistic about getting there and at 71, tired of trying.

[@janco333]

Better to live on the corner of the roof that with a quarrelsome wife - Proverbs 21:9

[@steveross4151]

The woman he described has ti be someone who is very emotionally stable and mature and in reality thats less than 2% of modern women so his situation is very rare. Most men will pay a heavy price if they try this at home.

[@lasermaxx4695]

I never realised how capable Alexander Grace is at unloading his mind. It really is impressive not only that his head has the capacity for that much meaning but that he can also articulate it outwords like a dozen shots from the hip.

[@matt-g-recovers]

Be careful about that Alexander. I thought I had that with my ex and after being together for almost 13 years all of a sudden I realized that that wasn't there. None of that was real. That safety that I had and being vulnerable was a big mistake

[@brianmeen2158]

Many of us men learn the hard way that being vulnerable with women rarely works out well.

[@dominikvonlavante6113]

Vulnerability never works with women. You can state what's on your mind, what is moving you. But never with the implied intention of unloading your problems onto her.

[@donpcmartin]

Orion knows the dangers. He sees the devastation afterwards in therapy. Alexander is probably very fortunate so that informs his views. I can understand both sides but honestly the professional here would fall on the more practical side of things

[@JSiracusan]

I liked this quote actually from a woman coach " But the reality is that no one person can fulfill all your desires. And the other bad news? No two people are 100% compatible. There will always be a compatibility gap. And the longer you’re together that gap becomes not only more obvious, but the extent of the incompatibility becomes clearer". Not to mention that life situations change and sometimes in super huge ways. Kids are one of those, they change everything from our biology to our time in many ways. Or maybe a serious illness... so yeah.

[@DwyaneWadeCounty]

Some KZbinr said that being vulnerable means being wide opened/defenseless to direct attacks by your opponent. If you as a warrior have your shield down and are wide open to direct attacks by your enemies, why would a woman put her faith in you? Bring your shield 🛡️ up and guard yourselves, men.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Alexander Grace is a great person to interview. Would have been great to hear more about his view on the difficulties of long term relationships, especially when juggling kids, etc. To some extent, getting the girl is the relatively easy part. The hard part is keeping the girl and navigating things like boredom, novelty, changes in power dynamics after kids, etc.

[@tomaszsosnowski9279]

He probably is too young to answer the children part. But in 20 years he will be wise.

[@33Jenesis]

Staying together is the hardest part. I barely lasted 25 years at my job, was sick and tired of it s couple of times. The only incentive was my pension and healthcare. The day I retired was the best day. I am a life long single. I don’t know how ppl stay together for decades until death. Habit? Children? Money? Sex? Fear of being alone?

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

@@tomaszsosnowski9279 I think you are right. I think his kid is still quite young.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

@@33Jenesis Even if you get married, you will still probably end up alone, poor and depressed via divorce. And you will probably only see your kids once a week or for the whole weekend, every other weekend. Marriage is no longer a guarantee of family for men.

[@dinos9607]

@@tomaszsosnowski9279 He is not too young, he is married for years to a woman he was with years before and they have a kid that will soon be a teenager. He is 40 years old or 42-43, he just looks younger.

[@davida.taylor8444]

I like the level-headedness of both of these youtubers. I stepped away from redpill content bc so much of it was toxic, not helpful, bitter, and really more blackpill than red. The topics and truths discussed here in the stoic, matter-of-fact manner in which they are discussed are very enlightening and helpful to navigating relationships.

[@GoldenMushroom64]

Exactly. Same with Courtney Ryan. I much prefer the levelheaded, calmer discussions about the difficulties with dating

[@brianmeen2158]

Yeah I’m red pill but I look at the comment sections under red pill videos and it’s mostly toxic and just blaming and hating on women. What’s worse is many of the guys complaining are in their early 20s and their views on women are completely warped

[@GoldenMushroom64]

@@brianmeen2158 yeah no don’t be like those guys. Just take red pill for the surface level advice like improve yourself and become a real man with desirable qualities and stay out of the rabbit hole

[@ams6454]

Red pill is reality, you dont have to like it. Blackpill is nihilism, in no way, shape or form is that more positive.

[@KD400_]

​@@brianmeen2158I mean what do u expect those young men were lied to. They had no fathers. I am one of them although I don't blindly follow red pill. I'm old school I want to provide for a woman

[@HKashaf]

This conversation exceeded most of my expectations. I am already subscribed to Alexander but I think it is time I gave Dr Orien his due. Excellent discussion guys.

[@yoanngrudzien2588]

Great to see you two together, two of the most level-headed and fair speakers on these kinds of topics, who educate and help men and women better understand one another other without bashing either sex unfairly. Would love to see these two on Chris Williamson's modern wisdom podcast some day.

[@dannyt503]

Yes! Both of these guys need to go on the Modern Wisdom podcast!

[@TroyDeFrates-jh8fc]

1:09:30. This is why I listen to you and respect your words: "Just because I have knowledge and training does not mean I know more than you...". Spoken like a real man would, impressed.

[@ishestora]

That’s so great having you guys doing a collab together!

[@bobbyz9052]

58:30 "When I correctly identify the true source of an emotion and I can bring it to my partner in a vulnerable sense, it does not frighten her...." What Alex gets wrong is that you can only express your feelings after you've correctly identified the true source of an emotion, so essentially after you've already solved your issue. I've always looked at it as giving your boss a progress report, you never say "everything's collapsing and I don't know what to do" you solve all the problems and tell your boss your solution

[@soulman888]

Love this metaphor. Thanks for developing the idea for me

[@varmastiko2908]

This metaphor also shows that the woman is indeed your boss if you have to play by her rules. If you need support you are entitled to it if you are doing your job in the relationship. If she has the permission to deny support from you, she is not only your boss but a cold, selfish boss at that. And you allowed it to happen. If your woman doesn't support you when you need it, there's no reason to be with her. Walk away and be single if that's the other option - or find a quality woman who actually brings something to the table.

[@joshua_finch]

Why is the woman the boss in your schema?

[@bobbyz9052]

@@joshua_finchI'm using the concept of "boss" as a useless rube that has to be coddled and only told generics about business lest they get overwhelmed, not a person in a position of authority

[@joshua_finch]

fair enough

[@dommier1051]

Absolutely two wonderful minds coming together to share ideas of positivity in the space of negativity. Healing our selves is the answer to find our own happiness.

[@ernestdrozdz1889]

I watched it all and I am deeply thankful. Seeing two guys engaged in an intelligent, respectful discussion is a gem to watch. It's also good to know there are people like you out there :)

[@alexjensen7439]

Incredible. I've never seen such a well balanced discussion where both speakers are genuinely interested in furthering their understanding of these topics.

[@fastneataverage]

One of the best discussions I have heard on KZbin regarding these topics. Excellent job guys.

[@jwbrooks55]

Honestly the two best KZbinrs in this area. So glad you guys could colab.

[@graywalkerjoin3rdparty74]

Excellent collaboration. I recommend both of you to those who seek relationship advice and have problems hearing the raw, unvarnished Truth. I've been looking forward to this for awhile now.

[@arihahyar4409]

Great discussion. Thank you. I am grateful that I did not get married until I until I was 52 - after doing tons of personal work. Leading to a calm supportive - mature relationship.

[@bayareaomg]

This is exactly what I needed to hear. I'm in a new relationship, the first one that actually is stable and improving my life. And yet I still feel me being uncomfortable with her stability. But it really is just my emotional issues showing themselves. Incredible podcast

[@bedaorama]

Hang on brother. Having a stable partner brought out all of my insecurities but I was willing to face my own demons and that made me a better partner and a more balanced person in general. It’s work. And it’s work that men don’t understand. For that reason I am so excited this content is out there!

[@jonathanrabbitt]

This was a wonderful conversation. Thanks Orion and Alexander for sharing your insight and experience.

[@fatboycarnivore8649]

I have to agree that this was a great video for no BS men's talk and how life really works.

[@toddmccullough6004]

Great conversion between mature adults. The both of you seem so secure in yourselves in discussing some pretty heavy topics. I feel like that's a rarity these days.

[@InboxJYP]

I have rarely been able to express my negative emotions to a woman and have it work out - the frustrating part is women will often vent or emotional dump on me but when I expect reciprication it is usually rejected

[@Insight-music]

As a man it’s part of the initiation into how to navigate this world. Once you’re considered an adult, nobody is going to care about your emotions and problems, nobody. They may play like they do care, but they really don’t deep down. You’re on your own.

[@InboxJYP]

@@Insight-music you are definitely right for the majority of people. A small % of people may actually care, but they are rare to come by

[@lamentistriangle281]

I understand you an this should not be accepted.

[@seanmccall7277]

Im just stunned and delighted how not- garden variety your approach is. You're also not an obsequious chatterbox which is what most people do to project sophistication and conceal that they dont have a lot of ideas. Youre different. Thank you Doc.

[@mremington8]

everyting you guys talked about was very valuable and helpful, loved the info, but what i REALLY loved the most, was when you diverged and how you both modeled and navigated through the disagreement like adults who respect themselves and each other. 10/10 guys, it was great to watch.

[@Michael-gd8op]

This was brilliant. Informative, intellectual, and even wholesome. Thank you for sharing such a fantastic conversation

[@finxoner]

This was such a good talk. And yes, men's mental health is so important

[@fastheartmartvideos]

I am a fan of both of these guys and this conversation is helping humanity more than any of us probably realize.

[@LilmissJ111]

Fantastic guest! I have followed Alexander Grace for years now!

[@Ihitemup_]

Amazing collab. Thanks. Got a lot of value out of it 🙌

[@mediaproductionpro]

An intellectual’s dream podcast... I appreciate you guys making this collaboration happen.

[@thedog5k]

‘Intellectual”

[@totalynotfunnyguy6581]

I was waiting for this interview for a long time since he mentioned it on Rich's podcast

[@aaronclarke1434]

Same.

[@nemishasharma5737]

I didn't know Alexander but it was really great listening to him, certainly an extremely well rounded guy.

[@juggernaut3299]

This chat was totally enjoyable. I have been following you both for a while. Listening to you together🤯

[@ChanceMacabre]

Two of my favorite manosphere creators!

[@pedro.pe916]

Seeing these two wise men collaborating is so satisfying...

[@logandwilliams]

What an interesting collaboration - glad you two met!

[@andrewfindlay7594]

2 phenomenal gentlemen - you both have such fantastic ideas - what a great collaboration!

[@em0_tion]

I loved this discussion, challenging each other's POV and reaching to common ground and conclusions, it was beautiful to witness. 👌😘 Please, invite another great Australian for a conversation - huMAN. 🙏

[@juhel5531]

' Iam vulnerable, my love, WITNESS ME!!!' Rephrasing Alexander Grace' words about how the solution to some vulnerabilities and feelings in a relationship is the very act of confiding said vulnerabilities.

[@blacktigre]

This is what we all needed. Both of you have great insights on your own. Together.. im not ready

[@mrbc1848vu]

Fantastic dialog for men. Listen up. Bravo Gentleman.

[@ivoted7199]

Wow! That was a fabulous and enlightening conversation. Well done gentlemen.

[@edwardtjones]

Really excellent conversation. I don't think any of us realized how much we'd appreciate the possible point of disagreement until the end of the episode. At the same time, I have my own perspective on the topic, and I don't feel like I have to align directly with either of you - that's part of what made this conversation so refreshing (even to the point of wanting to create my own channel). I've seen a female therapist for the last three years. I've seen a combination of men and women in the past, and I've felt more connected with the two women. However, I don't feel like I struggle with anger. My therapist and I understand that we don't share a number of opinions, and it's been refreshing to have my perspective validated despite not seeing eye-to-eye. I was raised by staunch progressives who are quick to dismiss my point-of-view when it sways from their own. I think each of us have our reasons for therapy, and the question of whether we're aligned more with a man or woman likely has to do with the material we're working through. I could see myself looking for a male therapist in the future, but for where I am right now, I'm really happy with my current therapist.

[@metalrat2]

I love to see you both in one video! Thank you both, gentleman!

[@LinusWilson]

The Aussie’s view was me before my divorce and the interviewer has my views post divorce. My wife did not like my emotional intimacy and shared very few thoughts until she moved out.

[@Dr.guydoingthings]

My parents got divorced when I was 4. I was starved of affection forever. Especially when I went to live with my dad and his girlfriend. She is the most opposite of nurturing you can get. My mom lived 2000 miles away. The fight is real for me. I’m 33 years old and I swear if I wouldn’t have found this channel; I don’t think I would have ever figured this out.

[@jaywalks9918]

That was helpful, thank you. I really enjoyed at one point how you disagreed and talked it through. Seeing people doing that is beautiful and inspiring. Differences are okay.

[@mattelswood9367]

Guys, thanks for this so much. I can very much relate to a lot of what you have said, both personally and, professionally. That description of male manifestation of depression is exquisitely accurate. I have had a number of ‘lightbulb moments’ in this 90 minutes 👍🏻

[@coolo73]

Two of my favorites. Some of the most balanced insights on KZbin regarding men's issues.

[@avacado9689]

My favourite, best, long awaited, most wanted Collab ever!!!!!! Love you guys ❤

[@arashghanbari5907]

Fantastic Collab, didn't expect it at all. Thanks guys.

[@franklanham6936]

I hope you two can do something like this on a repeating basis. Maybe address a specific area each time. Would be great!

[@Mr.McWatson]

Alex is great. Very fair and balanced advice and coaching.

[@Kashban]

Thought I had such a woman in my last GF, all over me, appreciated everything I did, so did I with her. Great chemistry, great sex life. Unfortunately she faked most of it (bar the sex) out of childhood trauma and when her energy ran out, it was over.

[@birdfriday]

If she had actually done the work, would it have lasted do you think?

[@sreville]

Feel this.

[@nightmareTomek]

OMG.😂 Can't win, eh? What was that about black-pill?

[@philliasphog6689]

58:00 Alexander Is white nighting here. The question he needs to answer is if he and his spouse were walking down a dark alley and he had a feeling that they should turn around but she wanted to go forward should she defer to his experience? This is what a captain demands of his crew. His experience of walking on the dark side that his spouse has never gone through is necessary to keep the ship afloat.

[@steveross4151]

he still has a few drops of hopeful simp in him

[@oops-iam708]

If she respects him …. She will follow him. I like how he finished at the 1hr point, there is a difference being supported and being a “mother”. This goes both ways, Men shouldn’t have to be the “father”.

[@basstheangelo]

@@oops-iam708 Nothing complicated. Men should act like a "pilot" in a relationship. Women should be the "flight attendant" of the relationship. There should be a clear cut leader of the relationship. It's the men.

[@oops-iam708]

@@basstheangelo in love pilots! Have you ever seen the movie little miss sunshine 🌞?

[@dannyt503]

Clicked on this immediately when i saw it show up in my feed. Love the content from both of these guys

[@prschuster]

I've had a lot of unlearning to do after being told for decades that men and women should be the same. That really messed up relationships for a long time.

[@GreenAlien2023]

Thanks for a great discussion between two mature men

[@BH195829]

guest has a special, developed relationship… most people seeking help do not have this - so your advice is 100% correct. 🙏😊💕🌎

[@insanbeno]

OH MY GOODNESS ! TWO OF MY FAVOURITE GUYS IN SOCILA MEDIA EVER ! Thank you guys. THANK YOU ! I got jitter even before watching 30 seconds !

[@matthewcoombs3282]

Enjoying the chat, however I dont think I have ever seen a youtube upload having this many ads. Approx one every five minutes!! I only stuck with it as it was you two guys.

[@slansidd]

Big fan of both channels, very good discussion

[@rickhewitt1417]

You guys are right on!!!

[@artmowo2779]

i am watching both of you since some time already. amazing to see you both discussing, great watch!

[@coleroyce]

Too many amazing points! It is frustrating to see so many damaged and broke but can’t see it and just complain about the world being the problem.

[@ZachAttack2U]

This was an amazing interview! Both of you are very effective communicators and seeing you discuss and resolve differing points of view was entertaining and insightful. I hope for many more interviews with Alexander Grace and others. 👍🔥

[@juboo4451]

"We can only express anger when we feel safe". Tadaa, Tocqueville-paradox finally explained in one phrase. Thankyou.

[@ReeceDee]

I also remember asking a girl is she happy with her life and she said something that has stuck with me ever since. She said she doesn't chase happiness....she is interested in the pursuit of a life that is satisfying. So achieving her objectives, her children being healthy and building a future are all satisfying things.

[@revolutionaryfrog]

Two great minds coming together!

[@Sheblah1]

I love the emergent nuances in this discussion. It really zooms in on that liminal zone between healthy and unhealthy relationships where vulnerability and its expression is concerned. It seems to come down to the quantity of co-dependent moments versus the quality of such moments. There is a continuum of co-dependent dynamics which all of us inhabit, and the lower we are on the scale the healthier our relationships, and vice versa for the higher end of the scale.

[@KingstonShredMaster]

The crossover we’ve all been waiting for

[@rogers5765]

Man quite informative and insightful love your work Thank you.

[@SaidMahmoud]

This is the best video for men of the year so far

[@tomwalker389]

Dr. Orion and Alexander. Tag Team Champions of the World.

[@mrsherwood2599]

Amazing. Ive been waiting for this since dry heaving in the butthurt, weak, resentful corners of the manosphere. Men who read books, ive been waiting and waiting.

[@DeborahBriggsDB]

Oh how I love the balance you both brought! 💛 Especially with the one with 'codependency' conversation. It's so beautiful cus I can relate with it on every level. 🔥💛

[@bedaorama]

On the vulnerability discussion, thanks for that exchange! Caveat: without work on yourself and understanding your deeper issues, throwing your unprocessed problems at a partner will outsource your responsibility. Your partner needs to trust you to take responsibility for your shit. If you’re lucky enough to have a high quality relationship based on mutual earned(!) trust and faith in each others capabilities to figure things out, it can be beautiful to feel that bond of mutual support. It all comes down to your history together and whether you have earned the trust through actions and showing that you can be held accountable for your promises.

[@mahdman3]

Outstanding discussion! Thank you

[@beezowdoodoozoppitybopbopb9488]

This is the crossover I've waited for for a while. I've thought about the overlap a bit. It's a shame alan roger currie passed away, hes the only other guy I'd have liked to see interviewed here

[@beezowdoodoozoppitybopbopb9488]

David X too

[@NYs9thwonder]

Oh wow! A huge collab! 😮huge fan of both creators!

[@alriccajucom]

Wow. I've been following Alexander Grace since maybe 2020 but I've only followed Orion in the past month. Glad to know they had this collaboration. Alexander is what a close friend would consider balanced and non-negative. Unlike the other RP channels. The other RP channels are kind of "black-pill" or would sometimes recommend immoral behavior.

[@Reversal89]

Possibly the 2 best virtual mentors I will ever have in my life, together !

[@musiceffects7566]

There is a lot of genius here, from both sides. Very nice work 👍

[@JakeSlayer1]

Alexander, you just saved my life. No kidding.... Emotional intimacy is what I crave from women. Sex is nice, but its just an expression of emotional intimacy. Orion, I love your work, or at least I thought I did... I'm undecided at this point. Please understand that you have been telling me that I cannot be vulnerable around women, that I can never have a bad day and let her see it, that I can never be depressed or sad and have her catch a glimpse of me. That message interpreted is: You cannot have emotional intimacy with a woman. If that is the case, why the hell do I want one? Your message, and SOOOO many others on KZbin have led me to a dark place where the dream of having a person who I feel emotionally connected to and can rely on has died. I don't want to walk on eggshells around my partner, and if that is what I have to do to keep her, I'd rather not have her. Alex, thanks for telling me that I don't have to. I understand not looking to her to fix my emotional problems, but dang man, crap is going to happen that wrecks me emotionally. Telling me that I have to hide all that from the one I should feel the most comfortable around is dangerous... I'm just asking to wear a frown when I lose my job and maybe get a hug in return. Is that too much to ask for, or should I just hide in the Captain's quarters and come out pretending like everything's rainbows and sunshine? That message is so damaging.....

[@Zero_Zero_Zero_Zero]

The reason men aren't as interested in investing as much in the pursuit/retention of women is the realization that they don't justify the effort. We've returned to the days before Tristan and Isolde. We are not broken, and it doesn't need to be fixed. The potion has simply worn off. We've stopped expecting people that can't be relied upon to keep long-term commitments, to keep long term commitments. That should continue. It's a reality based understanding. Delusion is not healthy, and constantly asking men to compensate for the lack of female credibility by doing and giving more is certainly not healthy for the men. Enjoy the ride gentlemen. They are what they are, we are what we are, and none should feel the need to change.

[@AtheismF7W]

Very well said

[@chrishnah]

Really it comes down to birth control, explicit material, apps, normalization of sex work for average women changing the dynamics completely. The same way America suffers too much food. There is a glut of sex and women cannot work together and unionize to gain their power back. There is a desperate lack of men and so they will do whatever to get one. At the same time men have lost respect for women for behaving poorly in sexual matters so it is difficult for men to be inspired by women.

[@stephaniemand]

38:08 “relationships with good women are a luxury of the men who done the work on themselves” Amen 🙏

[@garydrago]

What was surprising to me was that Alexander not only held his own with Orion but in some cases pushed back and got Orion to reconsider some of his views. That's huge being able to do that with a psychologist in such a short interaction

[@cartinemwanafunzi2584]

Great conversion between this men. I learn a lot, more of this please 😊

[@matt-g-recovers]

Holy smokes Christmas came early. I was going to suggest this. I was. This is exactly who I was going to suggest when you mentioned teaming up with other creators

[@cbielgib71]

After a few months of on/off with a toxic cheater I decided to kick her out of my life a few weeks ago. Now I'm totally focused and peaceful. Lesson learned, no more low hanging fruit for me, I'd rather be on my own.

[@Action_Savage_]

"Nothing more painful than the death of a dream". Disillusionment. This is so true. I've felt this way about Freedom and Justice in America, but I can see how so many men feel this way about the dream of having a relationship with a good woman.