What the HELL is Finding Jesus 2? (this movie is HELL and you all sent me there)

[@Saberspark]

I've never been in more pain in my entire life

[@cayuga2572]

Same with me as well...

[@PotatoSoupThe64th]

I’m willing to bet money that it can get worse

[@Real_Adam_Sandler]

Popcorn

[@apearchitect558]

you said it pal

[@ne3856]

The most unnecessary sequel of all time!

[@jsk-art]

This feels like it should be satire. They have a SHARK as the head of a Christian organization that lures in fish, its prey. HOW IS THIS NOT SATIRE?

[@sleepier9433]

because the shark doesn't commit molestation, *yet*

[@theimperfectgod7140]

Isn't beautiful? 🗿

[@WillieManga]

Why is it that the shark isn't depicted as Satan? Sure, sharks aren't really inherently evil; they just gotta eat. But with how sharks are depicted in cartoons, might as well go through with it; having the shark manipulate its prey for its own purposes like Satan is usually depicted as doing. Like, Finding Nemo tackled this much better. (Oh, no pun intended, by the way) There is a looming sense of fear there, not because Bruce is a shark, but because he's got these really creepy facial expressions. Still, he's really trying to keep from hurting innocent people and fighting his dark side. With how Finding Jesus 2, there's no twist, no tension, and no subtlety whatsoever. Well, I will admit that Mr. Sushi is twisted and shocking, but in a very disgusting and uncomfortable way. I said this before, but he's made of rice and seaweed, with just the barest bit of fish muscle in him and he's covered in periods while talking in a racist tone. What the fuck??!

[@jollama]

@@theimperfectgod7140 Yeah… it isn’t beautiful

[@carrot7868]

@@WillieManga because that would have required them actually putting effort into the movie.

[@ander_1O1]

The fact that “Finding Jesus 2” exists makes me question why there was ever a finding Jesus 1

[@Riff_10]

@@heheskibidi6885 F

[@soapy5113]

@@Riff_10 g

[@V_Anxietea]

@@soapy5113 H

[@glossymistake3114]

@@soapy5113 h

[@ihatepower4580]

@@glossymistake3114 I

[@SuperWiiBros08]

The fact that you destroyed the dvd and cover, I guess you now know how AVGN feels everytime

[@Paul_The_Writer]

Saber is very slowly becoming just like AVGN. Except Saber would be even angrier.

[@jadestormbringer3733]

@@Paul_The_Writer the angry video nerd

[@lacosanostraproductions1446]

You dont know how nostalgia I got hearing "Avgn" again after a long time ago... :^)

[@kirbyplays2093]

Its gonna take you back to the past

[@complimentbotd7232]

@@jadestormbringer3733 the angry direct-to-video nerd

[@lilstrawberry_lady]

This is that type of movie that if you asked me what was my favorite part I would say “I liked when it was over.”

[@Nicamon]

"I liked when it had yet to be created. And I wish it would stand that way!😓"

[@WigWoo1]

I didn't see you talk about the first one so every time you mentioned Muggles I swear I thought you were talking about Harry Potter

[@alena984]

Oh hi verified person

[@CyrusLagom]

You should definitely watch his review on the first movie.

[@MufflesTheGerbil]

Hi, didn't expect you to be here! 👋 :D

[@pinkneko13]

@SuccubusLuver same

[@The-Floor.]

What's the origin of your pfp?

[@dullsunrise8820]

I swear, the only reason why it’s called Finding Jesus in the first place is the creators begging you to seek Jesus after witnessing their movies

[@alicebthegachaweirdo8378]

That’s probably true lol

[@MR._KAT]

That's gonna be a little hard to do considering Jesus expired a long time ago.

[@pascal1964]

Unrelated question- But is ur pfp Shuichi from DR?

[@kovacsnovak6745]

@@MR._KAT yeah they meant try finding his remains

[@thanatoast]

@@MR._KAT You already said that joke.

[@jenniferellis1944]

"If I had a quarter for every Finding Jesus movie I would have two quarters, which isn't a lot, but it's strange that it happened twice."

[@sweepingdread6058]

You know what, if I had $500 for every Finding Jesus movie I would have $1,000. If they wanted to make money instead of giving us money, that would discourage them from making these.

[@Oliviagarry69420]

It’s actually nickels

[@Azucenary]

-Dr.Doofenshmirtz

[@maxxmason723]

Oof I've never heard a better quote for the situation lol

[@danktank9049]

No one: Finding Jesus 3: NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!

[@bdtproductions1522]

I like how Saberspark will always say "___ is the worst movie ever", yet somehow will always without fail find a worse movie, and I find that hilarious.

[@CranberryBaby393]

He sounds like he's in GENUINE pain, This poor man has pushed himself to the edge for our entertainment... He will not be forgotten.⛪

[@sanadapilled]

@@joshroehl6098 bruh i can’t do this shit rn 😭

[@hihowareya6861]

I mean cmon man he literally sawed the dvd and the carton in damn half 😂

[@sam4gaming135]

He didn't even show anything from the second movie

[@dr.vibecheck2953]

@Logan Roof cry about it

[@xenogeno5464]

Saberspark: “Fish Christians” Me in a cold sweat: “Fishtians”

[@Traumaqueenamy]

ha. ha. ha....🙃

[@personmcdudeguy]

they already use that fish symbol. its all comin together

[@cheeseisherelive753]

@@personmcdudeguy HAHAHA WAIT STOP 😂😂😂

[@All-due-respect-I-disagree]

Do you like Christicks?

[@monkeystuff661]

Lol wut 😂

[@桜島芽衣さくらじまめい]

The sushi guy doesn’t even REMOTELY sound Asian much less Japanese. He sounds like a drunk guy on a table, role playing while swinging a plastic Nodachi.

[@sky-sx5gt]

Lmao

[@LendriMujina]

Tell me about it. These kind of people think that an Asian accent is just mixing up R/L and you're done. (The irony is that our "R" sound, the alveolar approximant /ɹ/, is a pretty rare sound in the grand scheme of languages, while the alveolar tap /ɾ/ - the "in-between" sound that's being made fun of - is very common, just not in English. We're the weird ones in that department.)

[@Ronin11111111]

He sounds like a more racist Lo Wang.

[@jarofdelisauce2266]

I'm sorry, I was too distracted by the fact that his animation is LITERALLY copy and pasted. What makes it even worse, they didn't even bother animating it when it faces the other direction. It's flipping...flipped!

[@cintronproductions9430]

Of all characters from the first "movie", I can't believe that they brought back Mr. Sushi. They probably thought that he would be a fan favorite when actually he's the most hated character for obvious reasons.

[@Jart727]

I recently got a job with this production company and we are currently making a third Finding Jesus movie. It will be dedicated to you, Saberspark, as a thank you for all your support.

[@otakumarcus]

I refuse to believe

[@LateNightTableCo]

God: “Thou shall not steal.” Finding Jesus Crew: “Hey, I resent that. Taking stuff is stealing. Reworking ideas is copyright infringement.”

[@pepperedash4424]

@Hannah Eniola Just report him/her.

[@theredknight3736]

@Hannah Eniola not even mr. no-one ask

[@emperorreign6154]

Prince of Egypt remains the best Christian movie of all time where both atheists and Christians and those of other religious beliefs are united in their praise of a balanced, beautifully animated, well-written and powerful movie.

[@darthvader4594]

As muslim i also enjoyed that movie

[@marsverb]

As a Jew I take serious issue with calling Prince of Egypt a strictly Christian movie

[@lukebytes5366]

They use the bible as a thematic setting, it's not necessarily Christian.

[@Yeahimamusicalfan]

It’s a Christian, Muslim, and Jew movie

[@emperorreign6154]

@@marsverb no one said it was strictly a Christian movie. But as far as Christian movies go, it is the best. If you believe it’s the best Jewish movie of all time, that’s up to you, but I was speaking in general terms. Note how I threw Christians atheists and Muslims and those of OTHER religious beliefs in there? Hence the general perspective? Interesting how you threw in the term ‘strictly Christian’ when there was nothing ‘strictly’ attached in the OP whatsoever. Very interesting indeed.

[@magicjewel96]

Mental breakdown aside, you're getting really creative with your effects. I don't watch you too too often, but between your "reaction" to your doppelganger propositioning a sequel and the sounds that came when you dropped the vodka bottle (while a little hard to hear) were very humorous. I like your vids!

[@spoopyd.8910]

It's called finding Jesus because after watching the movie that's exactly what you wanna do.

[@realMintyFoxGaming]

Yes

[@TiredCorvid07]

Nice pfp :D

[@PA-1000]

Lol

[@MR._KAT]

Well he became extinct a long time ago so good luck with that.

[@Jormyyy]

I'm gonna need to find Cthulhu himself after this.

[@ninacoco7]

Man...I'm agnostic but my dad is Christian and he showed me movies like Price of Egypt, and Joseph and the Technicolor Dream Coat...THANK GOD IT WASN'T THIS

[@theterrorofdimensions1326]

Those were awesome, hands down. Not perfect, but no movie is. Yet, both were hands down a far stretch better than whatever the hell this thing was. I'd take VeggieTales any day. Hell, even the Hermie the Common Caterpillar series would trump this, because at least it used some pretty great (and/or decent) voice actors, and wasn't unbearable to watch.

[@cj_comments]

“Price of Egypt” Technicolor Dream Coat” O, m, goodness, I'm dying 😂😭😂

[@theterrorofdimensions1326]

@@cj_comments Well, I mean... it kinda was in technicolor for Joseph: King of Dreams. XDDD

[@ninacoco7]

@@theterrorofdimensions1326 omg I get those titles all mixed up...I work in theater and that musical kills me XD but that is the correct title for the movie

[@theterrorofdimensions1326]

@@ninacoco7 It's a gift, and sometimes a curse. I remember the entire movie almost line for line too... and I didn't even consciously make the decision to do that.

[@joujou1450]

The pure irony that the movie is called Finding Jesus and the fact that this movie is a fate worse than hell feels very special to me personally

[@TypeKK]

Imagine died but you don't go to hell, instead you reincarnated as fish and live at Bubble Town forever Hell is more interesting but Bubble Town...I don't know with that

[@doctoremmettlbrown5105]

LMAO

[@accountlol7409]

It was more like a Jesus fish cult than a Christian movie

[@TypeKK]

@@accountlol7409 Fishicollic Christianity

[@D.HansonOfficial]

@@accountlol7409 A Jesus fish cult that has nothing to do with Jesus

[@peterdaviesracing]

Saber's heated rage showed more passion and emotion than the whole cast of this movie together. Maybe they should've hired him. Oh wait, he'd have roasted/grilled the other fish.

[@tysondennis1016]

He would have left those horrible, gaslighting, religious fish out in the desert to dry.

[@demaoser7490]

Promotes an underwear called “sheath” isn’t helping the “I’m not a furry.” argument…

[@edenengland1883]

to be fair it isnt even an argument so much as it is an inside joke odds are he contacted them (or at least accepted them) solely for the joke

[@Nimori]

I was thinking the exact same thing.

[@bugjams]

I feel very sorry for all the non-biologists and non-furries seeing this comment who are gonna go search up what "sheath" means in this context.

[@hydratherussiangoose5702]

@@bugjams too late.

[@doubtful_seer]

@@bugjams lmao

[@unversedunavailable793]

Finding Jesus 2: The Sea-quel . They had prime opportunity. I would have spent at least 8 grand if they named it that. But no. They failed.

[@spddiesel]

For reals. They could've answered the age old question of whether or not fish have Soles.

[@pinkneko13]

If they had that kind of brain power then Finding Jesus wouldn't have existed, let alone the sequel.

[@connor48880]

That’s like them not calling Now You See Me 2, “Now You Don’t”

[@carrot7868]

For real......

[@Luvias0415]

@@spddiesel We already know fish don't have soles. Have you ever seen a fish in the red light district hike up their dress to show you all ten inches of their flipper?

[@KonroMan]

Prof. Shark: “You fish don’t blink.” The Fish: Proceed to blink. Saberspark: *LOSES HIS SANITY.*

[@WillieManga]

Was that a joke?? Like, were they trying to be ironic and funny? It's not funny! It's fucking insulting! It destroys the previous joke! And it's for kids! Fuck you, WowNow!

[@tiffany-up2ii]

Poor dude he sounds genuinely sad reviewing this

[@Jenninka]

I was having a bad day until I heard a grown man’s mind break over blinking cartoon fish

[@princessofvideoshorts9897]

Yep

[@linat8268]

Saber, this is one of my fave videos of yours. Rewatching your suffering brings me comfort.

[@FillBar]

It's like Finding Big Foot: they didn't find him but maybe next time.

[@idontwantanysubscribers1157]

Just some Bigfoot’s with internet access might reply to this comment.

[@firelinksshrine1695]

Oh god not again

[@roofogato]

Jesus: please don't find me

[@Catyoshi47]

...as a Christian, I am so frickin sorry to whoever has sat down and watched this garbage movie

[@literalfandomtrashnoseriou1992]

Same. Same.

[@TwentyItaliansLS]

Agreed.

[@Dumpster_Fire_246]

or someone who has a kid that this movie has become an involuntary staple of their childhood

[@certifiedobsessedtrash3410]

Yes, that is the truth

[@CB-jw7uy]

✝️

[@geoffnoelke]

Imagine a universe where finding Jesus is the original and finding Nemo is the copy

[@bucketbutters866]

No

[@strebicux6174]

It exists if the multiverse theory is true

[@SlaughterDog2006]

I will not

[@boyinblue.]

I hope the quality differences stay the same, that would be funny as hell.

[@Sketchy_Dood]

Simply impossible

[@thedabbinggamer3726]

I never knew that an ANIMATED MOVIE could look so much like it has a green screen

[@KoobyDooby]

The way he screams “STARFISH!!!” so aggressively makes me smile everytime.

[@Tonithemeloni04]

“Everytime?” EVERYTIME?!?! YOU WATCH THIS MORE THAN ONCE?!

[@bamr1318]

Here you go :) 9:45

[@The777brown]

Hahahaha

[@jillianearley2779]

Sammmee 😂

[@megasaur6511]

Mr. Sushi's design is downright awful ... despite the fact it's obviously racist, he shouldn't technically be ALIVE and be in the ocean. HE'S A LITERAL ROLL OF SUSHI Complete with the dead, raw fish parts, seaweed, and what appears to be rice. He even has Roe on his head! He's basically a negative Japanese stereotype that's also a literal zombie.

[@somedude3111]

And the seaweed is neon green

[@cookiecutter3758]

Body horror

[@realswobby]

It's just a movie for DUMB kids

[@megasaur6511]

@@realswobby Yea, it is, thank you for shortening what I said about how dumb it is in a quick sentence.

[@Antnj81]

... Aaaaaaaaaaaaand that's why Mr. Sushi is the BEST character ever!

[@anarespinosa]

I like how Saber just takes off his underwear instead of - I don’t know - showing us the product picture from the website?? Lmao

[@Chewbarta]

How else are we going to know the authenticity of the product if he doesn’t show it in action?

[@leonsillen1376]

You know, fair enough.

[@ubbles5174]

Wow when you read this without watching the video, it sure has a weird context 🥲

[@nunpho]

@@ubbles5174 yuuup 😂

[@zerobatsu]

I think it’s required as part of the sponsor read to show the actual product.

[@mephilesthedarkultimatevillain]

I'm not really a Christian person, but even I know dang well that this is so offensive to the core! I am so sorry for the christians that were offended by this disgraceful, disgusting, dumpster fire of a ripoff!

[@jasonaltig985]

😂

[@your_pal_whale2964]

This isn’t even a movie review anymore, it’s just Saber having a mental breakdown.

[@kevinthepilgrim]

Is is too mean if I say I'm enjoying it?

[@ExtremeWreck]

Yeah, I feel bad for him at this point.

[@frecklesandfries9209]

And we are HERE for it

[@sky-sx5gt]

I never thought a freaking movie would break someone until now

[@theperson_12]

@Dorothy Aru f i n d i n g j e s u s 3

[@callmesantos9244]

Fishes: prays for Jesus who is a human Jesus many years ago: spawned many fishes in the fishermen’s nets so that the villagers can eat

[@squirrel670]

Oof

[@llewelynshingler2173]

As in, so many fish that they needed a second boat to get the net in

[@michaelk5976]

... that's what i thought too

[@person7090]

@@llewelynshingler2173 yeah bro it was so many fish He did it twice even

[@llewelynshingler2173]

@@person7090 The second time being a time of day when it was bad for fishing, and that was signify that he was alive, despite the events leading up to that year's Passover

[@anntan9913]

10/10, they just adlibbed everything. There was no script.

[@henryisthere]

Fish: *Blinks* Saber: And I took that personally!

[@gossiperzoroark9629]

They needed a “sequel”because they _CLEARLY_ did not find any signs the first time.

[@therealmanos]

I seriously fucking lost it when you said, "What's his accent? Is he French? Is he fancy? Is he English?" Fancy is my favorite accent. This is top tier comedy. Thank you for this.

[@Lovinia1]

Jesus literally ate a fish after he resurrected just to prove he was alive. And some of his best friends where fishermen. I’ll just leave that there

[@crowMilatonin]

They’re masochist fish, what can I say

[@andrewcroasmun4158]

Your Correct

[@newbiegamelover4767]

Jesus literally proved who He was and convinced those people to follow Him by filling their nets so full of fish that their boats were sinking! Keep in mind that just prior to His arrival, those fishermen were not having any luck with catching anything! Not to mention the two fish that contributed to feeding the 5,000. Honestly, fish are the last creatures to have worshiping Jesus!

[@Lucifersfursona]

@@newbiegamelover4767 “do you have any idea how many fish jesus killed” is not something I was expecting to read today, but here I am. It’s that it’s not even. It’s accurate

[@alteredizzy]

@@newbiegamelover4767man this book sounds good I gotta get it from my local library

[@Lycan4]

"You got Wubbly the pinkfish. Who's red. And also a STARFISH!!" That part made me burst out laughing. XD

[@w31rd03]

We can all agree that this is something that even Jesus doesn't want.

[@thaliabalia9871]

Jesus, turning water into wine to try and forget this sh*t: I didn't get crucified for this

[@beanbrain6162]

@@thaliabalia9871 XD

[@JuanMartinez-hf8eb]

Even the Devil himself wouldn't accept this shitty trashbag of a movie being put in the deepest depths of Hell.

[@cfruge444]

@@JuanMartinez-hf8eb Unlike kzbin.info/www/bejne/gWrQgJSLhLGAfpI, at least it tried. *BTW, He Was Once came out in 1989.*

[@byrongardner9299]

666 likes mmm

[@funnyhappystudios]

Shark Tale: "I'm ready for y'alls apologies"

[@lamlelamatsiliza8550]

Who said you were bad? That was a comedy genius at its best

[@funnyhappystudios]

@@lamlelamatsiliza8550 Shark Tale: "Ah. I see you're a man of culture as well."

[@xakirax_8864]

I actually loved that movie and I don't know anyone who didn't like it

[@Kevin-jb2pv]

I never really thought of Shark Tale as a Finding Nemo ripoff. To me, it always felt like "Shrek Tale"

[@fathertime38]

No…

[@araccoonwithalaptop8637]

I’m a Christian and after watching this video, I was at church for some event (we were all vaccinated and still stayed distant from each other) and I asked my priest if he new about these movies. He said “I checked out the first one because I was trying to find some movies for the little kids, this was about when you were in kindergarten or first grade? Anyway, I was just trying to find some sort of movie to put on for the kids that was appropriate and literally had some sort of cartoon element to it so the kid’s won’t get bored and I watched the first movie. I have never been so horrified in my life and I barley got halfway into the movie before I had to shut it off. Even if it was the only movie I had, I would never show this to the kids. Well, at least we had Veggietales and some Mickey Mouse Club House episodes.” Thank you so much Father for not showing me this movie when I was little.

[@santiagoindisguise7289]

Yeah I don't think u will go anywhere near the church if ur dad showed u this movie

[@TheMadwomen]

@@santiagoindisguise7289 "Father" in the religious sense, not the familial sense. Your point is still true In any case!

[@santiagoindisguise7289]

@@TheMadwomen k but it still kinda works

[@alanaolmes4480]

You didn't need to include the vaccinated and social distance bullshit in your comment. But I'll give you credit, you at least didn't see this garbage.

[@octosquid48]

You know it's bad when you try to pander to Christian audiences but then members of said audience avoid it…

[@oblivioussenpai8109]

9:43 “You’ve got Wubbly the Pinkfish, who’s red. And also a sTARFISH!!” The sheer rage of this line made me laugh so much. And then he goes on to screech about fish blinking. New favorite section of any Saberspark video.

[@YMSHighlights]

The only thing worse than dollar store rip-offs are ones that shoehorn religion into them.

[@xblade149]

High adam

[@SnackGuy2Star]

As a religious boy who had to go through watching these types of movies I one hundred percent agree

[@xblade149]

@@SnackGuy2Star as a catholic I saw the trailer and wanted to bleach my eyes.

[@JohnAdams-pp7vi]

Amen

[@shotaaizawa1206]

Bane: *"I think Mr Sushi could use some friendly cheer"* * *Breaks man's neck* *

[@rey_overlord]

LMAO

[@ladysilverwynde]

I ugly laughed at that. 🤣

[@bonniehayes8161]

It was a mercy kill to stop him from seeing more of the movie

[@Everik-ct6pg]

I'm convinced that this movie was an asexually reproduced clone of the first movie, like how cells divide themselves in half. This is the first movie that was a product of cell division.

[@genericname2747]

But that means...there will be finding jesus 3 and 4

[@babyyoda9407]

Eventually, there will be a finding jeSUS infinity

[@lucianonafi7478]

They made a movie so shitty that it became the first fully man-made lifeform. Soon enough it will evolve into huge, planetary-scale lifeforms, much like our own. Instead of being made of cells, they will be made of finding jesus. Planets, no, entire star systems will be overwhelmed and consumed completely, all for one simple goal; Finding jesus. The universe is their oyster, these new, macro-scale lifeforms will grow, fight and evolve, eventually achieving sentience. They will look back uupon their origins, finding out that they're all composed out of shitty copies of a ripoff movie, although they have no concept of such things. Their greatest scientists will ponder who the hell this jesus guy is, what he has to do with fish, and why the hell must they find him? Alas, since our homeworld has long since been consumed by the first few billion copies of Finding Jesus, they will not have an answer. Finding jesus will be an empty quest; an ideal completely devoid of true meaning at this point. Finding Jesus is our future. We must embrace it.

[@stanleydykes4134]

@@lucianonafi7478 Holy F*** Dude!

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

@@babyyoda9407 AMOGUS

[@collinscoolness8072]

7:36 aneurism

[@rvmaika5815]

This movie doesn’t make me want to find Jesus. It makes me want to find an exorcist.

[@brawmankerlexterminateurde860]

It makes me wanna find the crucible and kill those who made this film

[@BrodySchutter]

Exactly

[@TheDeceptiveHero]

It makes me want to call the police.

[@michaelbadger3021]

Jesus is one.

[@WolfmanArt]

Shark: You can't blink *Fish blinks right in front of him* Talk about stupid... 🤦‍♂️

[@TheShelby313]

And they had to animate that. They wasted money to contradict a line

[@kingofmonsters14]

there's being a entertaining Christian property, like Prince of Egypt, Veggietales, Paradise Lost, and those who use a fantasy equivalent like Narnia and Lord of the Rings. then there are those that are a little preachy but somewhat decent- insert anything from Pure Flix, shows like Bibleman or Davie & Goliath, Pilgrim's Progress, or "based on a true story" films here then there are those that are insufferable... you found the one that goes in the insufferable catagory.

[@anautilus2004]

You left out Joshua and the Promised Land.

[@kingofmonsters14]

@@anautilus2004 what catagory would that be under?

[@masterseal0418]

You left out 7th Heaven cuz that show came out before David Gallagher played Riku in Kingdom Hearts.

[@AlastorAltruistGaming]

@@kingofmonsters14 the preachy but somewhat decent category is where Joshua & the Promised Land would go into. Preachy, but it at least tries.

[@kingofmonsters14]

@@AlastorAltruistGaming oh

[@gabriellebutkerait9684]

I laughed my heart out at the blinking part. I just lost it too, Saberspark. 10:05

[@anautilus2004]

The orange fish kid's voice sounds like an unholy blend of the voices of Guto (What's Up), Joshua (JatPL), and Sparky (A Car's Life).

[@sussybaka3648]

I don’t like that you’re right

[@Hugelag]

The unholy bootleg trilogy.

[@lazer2545]

Ironic

[@ghj743tf]

Yellow Fish = Muggles Blue Fish = Joy

[@kalinaszek]

I'm seriously considering making Christian 3d movie. The bar can't be lowered more

[@hongxiuquan69]

Best of luck, mi amigo.

[@JohnAdams-pp7vi]

God the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost go with you

[@wolvie1618]

Do it

[@sterlingodeaghaidh5086]

This is below bar honestly, even for Christian entertainment. Remmember we had Adventures in Oddesey and Veggie Tales. This isn't even close.

[@KingsBard]

please do

[@Bristol_Lively]

I am christian, but this is a disgrace to even Jesus himself.

[@tonyamousel4492]

Another Christian here, i totally agree

[@crowMilatonin]

Im glad we can all come together to make fun of this terrible movie

[@JesterKitty]

As another Christian, this is the worst fucking thing.

[@Bristol_Lively]

@dracoflame mega *He left because of the creators of this movie and our whole species in general.*

[@josephmoore286]

Well Jesus is not complaining.

[@whalus_gigantus]

I think "Finding Jesus" should be a movie about the people who created this movie

[@tessarothein7934]

Mr. Sushi COULD have been a clever insight on Religion. Assuming Mr. Sushi is a Buddhist, he could have achieved reincarnation after death, becoming a sushi roll. They could have fleshed out this character. They could have had an episode where the Christian community inquires on different religions. They could have had different organisms for different religions. An octopus to represent Hinduism, etc. Just don't be offensive and you would have had a compitent storyline.

[@maxxmason723]

Except for its a Christian movie and there is no other cult than Christian or you shall be shunned sorry I might be projecting a little saying as my Christian family thinks we should burn everyone who's not Christian and I'm Buddhist anywayyyyyyyy have a nice day

[@gleamingbige8119]

Hardcore Christians: *No*

[@Chosen1Creator]

What if Mr. Sushi is fish Jesus? Think about it, he's dead fish but resurrected.

[@maxsync183]

That would only work with reasonable, sensible people who are willing to listen to ideas they aren't familiar with and re-examine their own. So, not Christians.

[@mossy_6475]

They would never even consider that I’m sure. your idea is on a whole other level though and I love it

[@suiginmigasuto3356]

Chef Ramsey: *Taste tests the sushi. Spits it out. Then slams it into the garbage.* Chef Ramsey: “That sushi was **** TASTELESS!”

[@chickennoodleshoop17]

@Lucky Dove (Lucky) No, pretty sure that's a reference to the sushi character in the film

[@bamr1318]

Maybe making some sushi out of the main characters would help, or shark fin soup out of that perv professor

[@kaobunn]

The fact the picture of the logo even shows how WowNow's logo is shameless. Their logo is a direct similarity to Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs and then there are Flushed Away slugs next to it??

[@mileven3ggo3njoyer]

They are so desperate they have to steal from good movies in order to receive attention lmao

[@cintronproductions9430]

When Saber showed a picture of WowNow's catalog, I straight up thought that WowNow had their own streaming service! LOL, imagine if they actually do create a streaming service and charge like $9.99 a month for people to watch their garbage! Oh God, please no.

[@kaobunn]

@@cintronproductions9430 That sounds like hell

[@Wignut]

5:24 I love this edit so much

[@ClockworkChandelure]

As an italian who grew up watching Fraws destroy bad games in increasingly original ways after reviewing them, the treatment you gave this "movie" put a smile on my face.

[@MangaSt]

Oooooh (Cit. Necessaria)

[@AsassinoSilenzioso]

E se esistesse un gioco di codesto film?

[@ClockworkChandelure]

@@AsassinoSilenzioso dopo quel disastro di Maggia non me la sentirei di propinarlo a Fraws lol Per quanto, sarebbe divertente scoprire che esiste e che, in qualche modo, è meglio del film.

[@AsassinoSilenzioso]

@@ClockworkChandelure Fraws non se lo merita, pover'uomo

[@SuperIsaiah]

30% of the comments: insult christians 45% of comments: "I'm a Christian but I don't like this" 25% of comments: "saberspark is permanently scarred lmao"

[@mrbiglarge8820]

im that 45%

[@saulgoodman3d306]

@@mrbiglarge8820 bob

[@edenengland1883]

you forgot the 5% of people pointing out that he is sponsoring a brand called "sheath" which makes him look even more like a furry

[@saulgoodman3d306]

@@edenengland1883 bob

[@WyxienTheFox]

@@saulgoodman3d306 Bob

[@envemailer]

Since Christian media like The Prince of Egypt and Veggietales exists, why would Christian parents EVER play this for their kids?!

[@OverlyPositiveFanboy]

Because when literally everything else is promoting witchcraft, "anti-Christian values" and "evil wokeness", then you're really starved for options.

[@envemailer]

@@OverlyPositiveFanboy Good point, but I get the feeling there will ALWAYS be better options than Finding Jesus 2, lmao

[@_little_byrd_-0v0-]

At least when I was a kid, these types of movies, like gaithers pond and dorbees at least, were incredibly cheap. Sold in bargain bins at the grocery store, so they were also easily available to build up ur at home library of dvd’s and vhs’s. And even if ur parents aren’t the witchcraft fearing types like someone else mentioned, they may be like mine where they see the word Christian and are like ‘oh this will be safe to show my children and will have those Good Christian Values (TM) so it’s not just mindless brain rot.’ Lmao, that’s probably the point of it to the parents. To be educational. Same reason why you’d show ur kids something like Cyberchase or Fetch with Ruff Ruffman, which are good examples of shows being entertaining and educational. (Tho they weren’t Christian. Cyberchase taught math, and ruffman was a game show with challenges where u learn all kinds of school subjects.) The problem, as you have seen, is that the pandering to Christians content can have worse educational or moral values than their non Christian counterparts. I say educationally it’s worse because, in my experience, it’s not well written enough to teach the lessons effectively. And a lot of the morals they teach aren’t inherently Christian things, just stuff like ‘be kind’ and ‘don’t lie’. Messages slapped on at the end with a ‘Jesus said so’ to justify the pandering. And again, this is just in my personal experience, but a lot of non Christian specific shows do a much better job of explaining those same messages throughout the episode. And are usually much more clever about it, with better visuals to illustrate their points. So yeah, the reason there is a market for ‘Christian’ content is pretty ironic to me.

[@envemailer]

@@_little_byrd_-0v0- Yeah, I see where you're coming from. I honestly wasn't expecting a large, insightful comment, but I'm glad I got one

[@_little_byrd_-0v0-]

@@envemailer lol I’m glad u liked my essay

[@purplegirlsrandomnesschann2284]

11:48 They're not bottom of the barrel, they are 6 feet under the barrel

[@sid7906]

If there's anything we should be finding Jesus for, it's to pray for him to restore SaberSpark's sanity.

[@warlordofbritannia]

Nah, he’s def a furry, and that’s worse than being a Catholic

[@ewencarriou8160]

Question: even if we want Saber to regain his sanity? Do we want him to stop talking about shitty animation movies? No, of course we don't. If he regained his sanity, it would only be so we can watch it crumble again

[@tudornedelcu8396]

Let's hope that Saber restores his sanity... This... movie... is ABYSMAL!

[@tudornedelcu8396]

That's one HELL of a MOVIE!

[@KatsyKat]

@@warlordofbritannia stereotypes yes, actual furries not so much XD

[@jiroproduction8831]

Of course, these movies have *voice actors as slaves* to voice TERRIBLY at those characters

[@dariusharley5548]

I kinda feel bad for the voice actors

[@NickelPlateMxne]

Hey I knew you from somewhere but where

[@jiroproduction8831]

*"hope they break free for years of slavery by become slave actors"*

[@NickelPlateMxne]

@@jiroproduction8831 alternative ending _the military rescue them and they are brake free_

[@tdimybeloved]

Veemo

[@Donuts8]

Fish Jesus didn’t die for this. Some fins can never be forgiven.

[@zerosumgame5700]

Hateful upvote, representing reddit because you make me ashamed to use KZbin /s(sorta)

[@Graknorke]

No no, Jesus is a human in the film still.

[@Professorgutierrez]

Funny thing is that in Spanish fish (pescado) and sin (pecado) are similar.

[@carp2567]

No its Turtle Jesus

[@theinktank2558]

Šœmębœdÿ œńçę tœłd mę

[@butterman59]

9:44 literally made me pause the video so I could laugh without missing the rest of the video

[@nonamegiven202]

Cold Christian Robots, that's a band name if I ever heard one.

[@RLambkin]

Starts every show with a prayer of beeps and boops

[@foxycinnamonkitten997]

YES

[@tdimybeloved]

@@RLambkin bopeebo

[@kevincairo8917]

@@RLambkin or like in Futurama where their prayers are coded with 1's and 0's.

[@AFennecFoxy]

Fish: *mentions something about blinking* Saberspark: And i took that personally

[@hatchettwit]

A huge problem with a lot of Christian media unfortunately is that it is so disconnected to the culture it tries to imitate that it feels cold, robotic, and painful to listen to. There's been a few Christian movies that made decent commentary, but they still weren't well rounded. There was Seventh Heaven, and it was wonderful, but like.. it seemed like non Christians didn't care, it's "just another one of those" right? Not sure if more sorry Christian media sucks or that you had to sit through this.

[@mygmyparmoseT]

but Veggietales.

[@tooost1886]

You’re forgetting Veggietales

[@cottonhairedaesthetic2005]

Religious media is bad but media inspired by religion is not. 1. Prince of Egypt 2. Bucket list 3. Bruce almighty And there are others. When the movie doesn’t follow some old dudes constrictive idea of the religion it’s good and the morals actually stuck with me. I’m looking at you “bucket list”

[@ozzuwazzoo4124]

“Passion of the Christ” was the underside of “Finding Jesus’s” shoe. The only difference is passion of the Christ was racist. Finding jesus was terribly paced, didn’t get anywhere within the span of what felt like 5 hours, and just boring and mundane. (Veggitales holds a special place in my heart too)

[@mastermarkus5307]

STOP PRETENDING THAT VEGGIETALES WAS GOOD.

[@RandomAticsJR]

Honestly that usage of the Spec Ops: The Line music was pretty phenomenal

[@evanlandis990]

**puts Saber in a blanket, gives him Ibuprofen, and hot coco** shhhh, rest now. You need rest. Some of us care about your mental health **pat pat**

[@gabrielpineirogarcia2078]

Dont forget to slip him into his reliable sheath, to keep his junk secured

[@evanlandis990]

@@gabrielpineirogarcia2078 pls don't, I'm trying to be SFW

[@ubbles5174]

@@gabrielpineirogarcia2078 wtf?

[@meh8396]

#ProteccSaberSpark

[@gabrielpineirogarcia2078]

@@ubbles5174 Idk i was not expecting to Hear about someones junk tbh XD

[@lucify8143]

I love how Sabers was having a breakdown and making this at the sametime

[@Peanutbutter88]

Ikr

[@valkyriefyre79]

The orange fish has forward facing eyes, indicating that he is a predator The fact that he doesn't know what blinking is makes it worse

[@manabie1228]

If forward facing eyes indicating a predator, how about shark then? Are there any others characteristics?

[@Tentegen]

@@manabie1228 actually, its been studied that the position of their eyes offers them a very wide view range........with the various species of Hammer heads being the widest of them all.

[@manabie1228]

@@Tentegen Aaaaah i see, thanks for the information.

[@PlatoonGoon]

@@manabie1228 Very weird move to try to disprove a fact with an example. Everything has exceptions.

[@blueenderman2164]

8:49 the fish crusade

[@justsomerandomboi5390]

Oh a sequel. HES GOING CRAZY SAVE HIM

[@tahaa.]

The Sequel that we didn't need but We needed it. Good God that Movie made him sure go though Hell and then he destroyed the DVD to end all that sequel's madness to his brain because it was downright Garbage.

[@justsomerandomboi5390]

@@tahaa. the most accurate description

[@ohmaplaymaker]

Prepare for trouble and make double

[@thejplace3947]

Hey Spike

[@tahaa.]

@@thejplace3947 From Brawl Stars.

[@BendyfanAnimations]

Saberspark: No, you can't just swap out the color palette and call it a new movie! Wownow Kids: Haha sequel go weeeeee

[@lunarplayz6568]

Yes

[@MM-rz8hr]

Dude how are the first two replies to this relatively simple comment so ridiculous

[@s.b.6836]

@@aztapsii3260 no.

[@apoksubutai5237]

@@aztapsii3260 .-.

[@iainballas]

@@aztapsii3260 Democracy is the worst system of government on the planet Barring, of course, all the rest.

[@yuki_1002]

The repeated mentions of “It’s another beautiful day” makes it sound like the movie was originally a failed tv show that the creators combined together to make it a “movie”.

[@inferno9924]

I think you're on to something, and I hate it

[@nachoghost]

I don't know why but that just makes it worse

[@rachelthompson7487]

Yeah it makes it sound like a show instead of a movie.

[@goldensundeer1139]

His anger towards their lack of blinking has to be one of the funniest things I've seen recently! XD Omg! This movie has a Tommy Wisseau level of competence.

[@roguereaver634]

I like how Mr Sushi is just a sentient, floating pile of mutilated flesh topped with their unborn children?

[@ricekrispies1917]

Apparently they didn't think the Japanese qualified to be anything but a massacre of fish parts

[@LendriMujina]

Funny thing is, sushi doesn't even _have_ to involve fish. 寿司 [すし (sushi)] just means vinegared rice. But I guess you can't expect someone like these guys to know that.

[@demonzone2571]

How to make a terrible movie: Step 1: have terrible voice acting Step 2: have terrible character design Step 3: have no script Step 4: treat your audience like brain dead monkeys Step 5: have the movie be heavy on a certain religion Step 6: Profit

[@allenmurallo3730]

You forgot about step about pandering.

[@wannabehistorian371]

@@allenmurallo3730 Step 5

[@ShortyRockz1980]

"the terrible Christian movie incident" June 18 2021

[@JohnAdams-pp7vi]

Step 7: take your $2 million and go to Rio!

[@ThatFoxyPixelKid]

8: Make a sequel and if that doesn't flop horribly make a third movie

[@dragonslayer101]

Finally, a movie that actually mentally broke Saber.

[@GreenTomas2372]

It broke him so badly that he destroyed the disk and DVD cover

[@mayasabiniano178]

God be like: NONE-EXISTING MY CHILD

[@ainsleyharriot6060]

Trolland

[@justsomeplantcells-]

The movie sent him to jesus

[@shoeboi4596]

@@GreenTomas2372 1:07 3:35 3:55 gentleman, welcome to Dubai.

[@abby-cadabby]

Please let there be a Finding Jesus 3 🙏 I'd love to see Saberspark review another FJ movie/show 😂

[@remiliascarletmybeloved]

This reminds me of that line in Ray Bradbury’s The Martin Chronicles where a priest said he’d build an underwater cathedral if he figured out fish had souls, but if someone made a shitty movie out of that one line

[@Kenajovski]

As a christian myself, I feel ashamed and I really feel like Jesus' name was ashamed too. This movie really makes seem us, christians like goofy children.

[@nerfcontent9429]

Yeah

[@nerfcontent9429]

I really just wanna just saber a hug and say sorry as a aduinace member for him he has been permanently traumatized and I feel so bad for him

[@gabrielgaming1102]

Same

[@_Rhatsody]

You are...though lol. As a collective you definitely are goofy children

[@bread_the_god6737]

@@_Rhatsody what?

[@BiGGMiXX340]

Finding jesus 2: Exists Saber: "And I took that personally."

[@generalrygy4532]

lets hope there is no finding jesus 3: we finally found him. it took awhile. we went through hell twice. lets actually do something.

[@mapledemon5601]

He has all the right to take it personally

[@youdonotcare]

Just got an ad while the shark laughing scene was going on that started with Shark Tank

[@yospiderz1574]

this can’t be THAT bad. edit: i watched the trailer, it’s *horrible*

[@scienceguy1165]

lol

[@allenmurallo3730]

There's a trailer for this movie?

[@rosesweetcharlotte]

You poor soul!

[@NotTheRealFishman4]

Saber's therapist: "finding jesus 2 isnt real. It cant hurt you" Finding jesus 2:

[@scoutshi2340]

Sus movie

[@Pillzpop]

Saberspark: "It's like a support bra, but for your junk." Me, a woman: "Interesting . . ."

[@buttpiratesbuttpirate5913]

Are you one of those femoids that likes to touch on man junk

[@deusexmangaka6994]

@@buttpiratesbuttpirate5913 What the actual fuck?

[@c.d.dailey8013]

I am a woman too. I felt so awkward watching the sponsorship in this video. There is TMI. I am really not the right target customer. I do understand the appeal of the product though. I personally like wearing sports bras. They are so comfortable and supportive. These underpants are like that but for men.

[@hotrodk1030]

@@buttpiratesbuttpirate5913 you are what’s wrong with the world

[@buttpiratesbuttpirate5913]

@@hotrodk1030 "Hey pot, it's me kettle. Just called to say you're black." *click*

[@fat_little_rat]

5:24 *"I think poor Mr sushi could use some friendly cheer"*

[@greywalker505]

“Thank you, Dr. Pavel.”

[@DawnOfTheOzz]

Cthulhu: I have risen at last. What new spores of madness can I unleash upon humanity? *Finds Finding Jesus 2 on Amazon* Cthulhu: Well, fuck this shit. I'm going back to sleep.

[@crimson5689]

Cthulhu: Guess someone already beat me to it...

[@samkelman3101]

@@crimson5689 😂

[@santiagoindisguise7289]

He is gonna let Jesus do the work

[@Beebs4583]

Saber sounding like he’s on the brink of tears at the beginning is truly the best part.

[@sky-sx5gt]

Ikr?

[@loganmosher5935]

Poor Saber But Yeah Wow Now Pictures It's Up There With Dingo Pictures And Mondo Studios The Three Worst Animation Studios Every As For Finding Jesus 2 WORST ANIMATED MOVIE EVER THIS IS SOMETHING THAT NED FLANDERS WOULD COME UP WITH WHEN HE'S NOT WORKING AT HIS STORE AND THE VOICE ACTING WHAT THE FUCK NOT TO MENTIONED ONE OF THE CHARACTERS MR. SUSHI IS A OFFENSE TO JAPANESE AMERICANS!! TWO THUMBS DOWN WAAAAAAYYYY DOOOOWWWNNNN! END RANT ( me drop mic 🎙️)

[@mariajimenafigueroa233]

Pixar's Luca is finally here, so they better not be any rip-offs (especially a TON of it is like if the casé with Finding Nemo) EDIT: Luca was great!

[@rosesweetcharlotte]

It has swimming, so yes.

[@swinelias]

Don't get too confident there

[@miunya]

Luca was so good.

[@kiartoons2010]

I’m waiting for some ripoff titles, guys...

[@KAT-kp9lf]

Rip off it's gonna be called Luna or luc or Lucas

[@animegamergirl09]

9:45 just leaving this time stamp here for myself because it cracks me up

[@defyyourlogic487]

When his impersonation was still better than the actual voice acting.

[@MajorTomFisher]

This movie is why Jesus made sure to tear apart the fish into millions of pieces when he fed the 5000

[@princessofvideoshorts9897]

Fun fact: this video is basically isnasnity by saberspark and the movie

[@MiguelHernandez-lo5lg]

He genuinely sounded like this film broke him. Even if it didnt it came damn close to doing it.

[@adrianionescu9004]

That part where Bane (basically) was talking about Sushi seemed like he gave up on being a villain and decided to become something else. (He made the decision on LSD, though.)