Session 6 | Beverly | In Therapy with Alex Howard

This week, Beverly is grappling with the decision whether or not to move back up north. She simply doesn’t know what to do, and it is causing her a lot of anxiety. I explain that not knowing is okay, and that true knowing doesn’t just come from your brain; it also comes from your heart.
Alex Howard is a London-based Therapeutic Coach dedicated to helping break the stigma around mental health and helping people make real, positive changes in their lives. Alex is also the creator of Therapeutic Coaching and founder of The Optimum Health Clinic and Conscious Life.
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Website: www.alexhoward.com
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Content is produced and directed by Oliver Halls (Instagram: @oliver.halls) and edited by Jeremiah Fernandes (Instagram: @jeremiah.fernandes).

[@gabrielakarl3859]

Ive been crying alongside with you Beverly...hearing our distrustful parents s voices in our heads is so damaging...trapped in our own heads, in our skin, eithout the ability to live and feel FULLY, without complete acceptance and authenticity is hard...this level of repression is oh so much like punch in the gut! Doc, Good job in helping peeling at her layers! Beautiful job! So so skilful! Its like watching beautiful art...it moves you and opens your mind and soul ❤

[@dustyblue7727]

Thank you Beverly, you are a beautiful person. I hope you will feel your answer soon. Thank you Alex for showing the ways to feeling.

[@ankewolf793]

I know this place so well. Thank you for sharing. I learned on my way after my divorce, that I never have control, that I never know & being okay with that & living by your truth & heart it becomes a very sweet point to live from. We are in Earth School. Let’s enjoy the ride. ❤

[@gabrielakarl3859]

I love, love, love! the reflexions at the end of each session!!! I can't thank you enough!!!

[@victoriazajchowski9257]

What an inspiring session. Thank you both - Beverly - you're so brave! Good luck on your journey! And Alex, you are a superb therapist! Bravo!

[@SuperNorini]

In a similar place as Beverly.... Painful and frightening... To be in that stuck place....

[@sandimoo]

❤️

[@RecoveringHermit]

I can relate to the decision paralysis over living location. My solution has been to pick nowhere and to spend some time as a digital nomad. I will see where I end up and where I feel like I belong.

[@buildingemotionalintelligence]

Fascinated by this session. Thank you both for putting it up. It gives great insight in to the various "traps" we accumulate and how we can connect too and unravel them. It also shows me how we can help each other while in relationship and how powerful that is.

[@gabrielakarl3859]

"im not always right when im right" ❤😂

[@lisaalexander1824]

Fear of the unknown can be mitigated by remembering you have a good mind, intelligence to cope and work out problems that pop up...youve survived this long by using your intellect..add more compassion and the love of nature and your own life to come to inner knowing and peace..x

[@Barbara-yj5tl]

I struggle making decisions. Always anxious of making the wrong choice i chop & change my mind constantly until i THINK I know what I want. Most often end up believing I’ve chosen wrongly. It drives me mad!

[@helen2158]

I enjoy the humor in your interactions . In my experience, shared humor is a very good indicator of a working therapeutic relationship. I once had a very good (validating, kind, empathetic with good boundaries in place ) therapist with whom I also had, as our relationship solidified, regular humorous moments . These were an important aspect of the healing process, I think.

[@AnneFabienneRaven]

I default to putting everyone else's needs above mine and what helps is to begin to listen and honour my needs

[@gaylaaustin7468]

I made a "heart based" decision to move home. BIG mistake. talked to lots of folks who say the same . . .

[@jillurron2989]

Thank you for sharing your story. So much content and wisdom and guidance. It has made reflect - 1 - other people's opinions? 2 - whats true? Alex the section on boundaries/needs/strength - are these qualities we would get from our parents?

[@anitamurkes9511]

I am in exactly the same place as Beverly. Tried to push a move for a year, finally realizing I was not aligned. Now allowing the not-knowing place. The only problem is, after several months I still don’t know.

[@saram5659]

I wish you'd taught her how to regulate first before letting her get so triggered. She is clearly very very upset and dissociating. This happens in a lot of therapy sessions and I wonder if it's helpful. For me that made 'going there' outside session even more scary because I knew I would get lost in the trauma response for hours without the skill of calming / grounding myself again.

[@seethroughmeb.8070]

I wish she could let herself cry. She fights it so hard.

[@Liza0868]

It has to be perfect, otherwise, why bother. 🙂🙃 Only it is not so perfect most of the time. And we survive (after loads of anxiety). And we make the almost right decision. Which is good.

[@thescapegoatclub]

I’d love to know the therapeutic technique Alex is using to work with Beverley’s inner feelings. Can anyone comment?

[@baja1988_Texas]

Extremely confusing and contradictory.