Shame, Silence, and Social Media: The Non-consensual Use of DID Content as Examples of Feigned DID.

[@emiwarble]

I am so sick of professionals looking at online content and determining whether someone is faking DID or not. Like... for one: who is this helping? And for two: they're the same ones who say "don't believe everything you see online" when it comes to self-diagnosing, but they have no problem taking what they see online at face value? It's hypocritical, and it just feels like disguised bullying

[@TheAzureSystem]

It's just making it easier to bully systems

[@alysmarcus7747]

yes - i''m tired of everyone doing this sort of thing! This 'reaction' stuff is a start. listen to music , don't diagnose the person doing it. I have my degrees in psychology, and i worked in several clinics - only on intern status because i have DID - and would soon begin my treatment when i got sick with another ailment that brought me to be disabled. i know alot about diagosis etc And i won't I absolutely not even when asked state a guess on another person's truth.

[@gothmamafreedom]

yes exactly ….who is this helping? just a way for those mental health practitioners who disbelieve DID to do so with different language

[@stephaniemomma]

This seems as though it could be a violation of the Goldwater rule…

[@FairyBogFather]

Also I appreciate you mentioning how black and brown folks are underrepresented in scientific research. It is so difficult for bipoc (esp black and native ppl) to be diagnosed with anything other than ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder). I'm mixed and I've still faced so much discrimination when it comes to medical care. I've been accused of faking, lying, overreacting, and being crazy/lazy/weird. Ab*se and malpractice in medical care is so real.

[@andersonsystem2]

As black man and a sysytem and a content creator we can understand. I hope things can change in thay area.

[@DaveGrean]

This only relates to your last sentence since I'm white, but literally the only reason I haven't gone for an ADHD diagnosis yet despite having known for a year I have it and clearly needing meds to function (ex-"gifted" kid yet somehow now 30 and no degree, no steady job, live with parents) is that I'm too afraid of being told I'm "too smart to have a disorder" and am "just lazy/don't care" like my old teachers did, that my mother will have wasted 600 € on the attempted diagnosis, and that she won't take the idea that doctors can be wrong seriously enough to try again. I keep reading testimonials from ex-gifted kids diagnosed in adulthood that they had to try multiple times before they found a doctor that took them seriously. I've also had many unrelated horrible experiences with medical professionals, like a dentist telling me it was impossible that I was feeling any pain even though I was crying out like a wild animal (thereby implying I was doing that for attention, I suppose...? I am an adult). I've lost all my trust in the medical establishment and can only hope that I will be lucky enough to never have any serious medical conditions again.

[@fenixmeaney6170]

People have been begging colonizers to stop for centuries. Not once have they listened. Not one single apology uttered for all the civilizations they have burned. They haven't even stopped doing that yet. But self defense against them is seen as a tantrum? Your defiance is not oppositional. And it is NOT a disorder.

[@stephaniemomma]

I’m Penobscot and going through my own journey with mental health. I’m also a researcher and nearly a fully cooked scientist 😂 I am finally set to graduate in 2025 in molecular and cellular biology. Anywho, I’m obsessive by nature and use that flaw as a study tool often. A year, maybe two yrs ago I tried researching for indigenous stats in the DID/OSDD groupings. I couldn’t find a single stat. The closest I found was a dissertation conducted and written by a fellow indigenous woman (not my tribe- I’d have to google again to be sure) who was writing abt her lack of success in finding Native American stats in these groupings. And her projections for the future. I think her thesis could have been a decade or even older. But I found it a year or 2 ago and there was nothing else on any of my go to’s. Note: I believe that there may have been stats for other indigenous groups outside of the Americas, possibly the Australian Aboriginals? But I don’t recall the specifics as it was not what I was looking for.

[@sniv2516]

I swear, they're literally doing the "if you're ok with having DID, or if you talk about having DID, or know you have DID, or have DID, you're faking DID" joke but for real. We don't have DID/OSDD ourselves, but we stand firmly with y'all, this is awful. The gatekeeping is bad enough within some plural communities without visible medical professionals supporting obvious bullshit, I really hope y'all and everyone else they mentioned are ok, and feel able to continue being open!

[@Tristan-M-1]

Literally!! I saw somebody on a different site say something along the lines of "if all your patients hate their disorder and hide it out of shame, you're a sh*tty therapist" and I think someone needs to tell them that.

[@FairyBogFather]

Having DID does not make me feel shame. Discovering that I had it via research and joining the online DID community actually eliminated a lot of the shame and confusion I WAS dealing with, not being able to understand my mind and body. It's studies like the one you highlight here that actually only serve to perpetuate shame and confusion, by actively harming those with DID and the DID/neurodivergent community at large. Thank you for talking about this!

[@NaviWolf9]

Thiiiiiis

[@spinfoilhat3087]

thiiiiiis! I am 31 and have known I had DID since I was maybe about 15 or so but I didn't have the language to describe it until I found online communities for DID when I was about 25. I knew damn well something was up because if I wasn't ignoring it, I was severely impacted by it and only managed to function based off of long term trial and error to help mitigate my memory issues as much as possible, and work as best as I could for my system to coexist as best as we could. I mean waking up to see entire conversations I had with people and don't remember is one hell of a tell that something is up, right? Thankfully we're all collectively stubborn so while it's been a struggle over the years to go at this largely without therapy, we've reached a point we can function and somewhat retain information for the whole system. It wasn't always like that, especially before we were on Skype and Discord and could leave messages to each other. Unfortunately, over the years the online community AND the medical community have both been not the best. Most of the time it's not so bad, but I often run into the more...disagreeable situations. Online I've seen a stigma that if someone's MH presents in a different way, (Fictive heavy systems? When I was often neglected and left to TV as a child while both my parents were gone? Absolutely inconceivable!) or if someone describes their experience in a way that doesn't match up with someone else (like with differing terminology like "alters" or "headmates" and one being more "correct" than the other) then it's faking. In my therapy, 99% of the time if I am open about being a system and not hindered by it then I am faking, and I move on to find someone else with active listening skills. I thankfully had ONE therapist, my last one, who was in my court and validated that I do in fact have this thing and she basically had me nailed before I even fully came out about it. She noticed the switches, the change in demeanor and tone from visit to visit, and it was the best thing in the world. I almost got a full diagnosis but lost my job right as I was about to get it so that's on the back burner again. I've clung to that, because people are SO quick to judge others, which makes for a GREAT environment when someone is already traumatized. I've especially clung to that validation because I have decided, for the sake of making it easy as possible to get future jobs because where I live being trans is "bad enough", I likely won't get a formal diagnosis. We don't always know what someone had been through, what has led them to the point they are at right now, or they are actively going through at that moment. We all need to be nicer and more empathetic and supportive to each other, is that so much to ask??? Healing trauma begins with compassion, not perpetuating more hatred and stigmas.

[@peachdreams]

so well said!

[@LongSoulSystem]

Thank you so much for this eloquent explanation. Yes, shame is a big part of CPTSD., but it's appalling that clinicians are not familiar with unashamed, recovered and thriving systems. I feel there are three possibilities for their posture: 1. They are being pressured to this narrative and not necessarily believe it. Like when clinicians were pressured to not believe claims of CSA when the FMSF sued therapists. Which makes them terrible advocates who prefer to attack their patients just to defend themselves. 2. They are just bad clinicians who have never seen a recovered patient. They have never guided anyone from crisis through recovery and a thriving life. 3. They have an unacknowledged problem with this new generation and expression. Social media and new generations are now more comfortable sharing their private spaces with the world. Any type of person can now share themselves with the world (and sometimes, are even asked to, to apply for a visa or a job). This is an entirely new area, and their clinical information should be updated to understand new expressions of distress. Anyway... I had Bethany Brand in a high regard.

[@starfallstreams]

after that video, i really question what they've been doing to those patients he has. why haven't they EVER been able to heal? why after so long are they STILL ashamed, scared, and confused? why did no one say anything or prevent him from such an unethical presentation? is this normal there? hearing about everything he said and did.. it's disgusting

[@trappedinmymind485]

Shame can also come from poor reactions/treatments from others when they notice their symptoms. Makes me wonder how he treats his patients if all of them feel ashamed…

[@stygian6642]

My thoughts exactly

[@DIDHatchery]

Thank you for this detailed response. Shame is not a criteria for DID. People must remember how often experts have repeatedly got things wrong throughout psychiatric history. It’s more often than not. Lots of love! 💜

[@peachdreams]

And those that do experience shame could do so because of things like, not having enough awareness in the broader community and DID advocates to relate to online, if anything those in the DID youtube community actively help towards reducing shame :) And also, for someone to speak up on something that they (wrongly) feel shame for, that action helps to heal their own shame :) I have an invisible injury and feel making videos on my condition could help others (despite feeling unnecessary shame). When will 'medical professionals' learn to respect & listen to people who first-hand have things they apparently know about (it's almost like they think they know more o.0 ). Secondly, these 'researchers' don't seem to understand the difference between a brain's functional development due to trauma (Structural dissociation) and general mental health. Yes having DID could certainly go along with mental health issues like depression, negative self-concept and anxiety, but growing and building oneself up to not be shame-ridden is not going to get rid of DID, that is how the brain formed to protect them. Therefore one can certainly have DID/OSDD and be strong mentally and be accepting of their system.

[@lycharose]

@14:50 You bringing up the double bind of "if you let your symptoms be seen you're faking but if you don't let your symptoms be seen then they must not be real" is really important; one of the ways (from our understanding) that DID is thought to develop is by a caregiver figure putting a child in an impossible double bind. Doing this kind of thing to a DID patient is just rife with the possibility of retraumatization patterns imho

[@peachdreams]

100! And it's so important for 'medical professionals' in that field, to not invalidate their patients or their experience for the same reason! It's so important for those with or suspected to have DID/OSDD to be believed, feel seen, and be validated in their experience. DID/OSDD can be very individualised and differ from person to person in presentation/experience too. I really hope the world learns to be more validating.

[@ormirian7364]

Classic case of medical professionals who fear the loss of their position of power over their patients and the Narrative, and kicking back against confidence and self-sufficiency - and yeah, the catch-22 of our assessors believing in the myth of their own objectivity - our assessor wrote “I would have diagnosed you with DID instead of DDNOS if I’d met alters” to which we had to point out that he was a cis man in a position of power over us that we didn’t know, so why would he expect the privilege of us showing ourselves to him the way he wanted? The pathologising and infantilising is relentless - and the failure to understand that plurals learning to live harmoniously as a collective is just as positive an outcome as “fusing” or whatever their narrow models of “recovery” might expect to see - thank you for this

[@ameliab324]

People with depression also often hide it. Does anyone say that someone must be faking their depression if they talk about it? No, because depression has already been destigmatized to a huge extent, while DID is still seen as something obscure, half-mythical, and always 100% debilitating. It saddens me, as a friend of a system and a person trying to speak up for systems when it's needed. People don't want to listen,and that's something that can't be undone easily.

[@Hmobrand]

Thank you for doing this. That video from McLean really harmed the DID community, and I am surprised to see that there has been no ownership or apology from those responsible, but it helps to see others speak out against this injustice.

[@strangewish5051]

You were my lifeline during my coming-to-terms with my system. I’m so thankful for your content

[@serenediipity]

we appreciate you speaking out on this. the idea that only someone who’s ashamed of themself can truly be disordered is disgusting and only further pathologizes our experiences to alienate us

[@thatonebab7351]

I am still in the shame phase. I'm trying to work through it, but professionals and laymen alike acting in this way and acting like not being shameful automatically means lies and deception isn't helping. I want to be open, but I can't really in online spaces where fakeclaiming is largely still acceptable.

[@mitch-te5ss]

The term imitative DID is painful beyond words imo. When I first realized I was plural in 2020, it took me 3 months before i had the confidence to tell my therapist I had been seeing since I was a child about my discovery. She had told me in a past she "knew a lot" about DID. Among many things she told me which I won't repeat for my own mental well-being, one of them was this; "You're just imitating. And all the people you spoke to who say they have DID are lying and you shouldn't talk to any of them." Which was damaging, not just because she went on to say even worse things, but because I knew that I wasn't imitating anyone. I had been close to people with DID, both diagnosed and un-diagnosed, for years, and never once did I find myself mimicking them or taking on their traits. I won't lie and say I never thought to myself "I wonder how that would feel" but I never put effort into trying to pretend to have something that I don't. Not only that, but after I talked to my therapist and was told that, I disconnected myself from the support system and community I had surrounded myself with that had been a huge help in terms of self-acceptance and dealing with my realization. And yet, it still didn't stop- my alters were still there, and I was still aware of them, still distressed, etc. I left those communities and decided not to discuss my plurality and all it did was hurt me and isolate me- its been nearly four years. My alters are still here. I don't have- *they* do not have anyone to be mimicking anymore, anyone to pretend for. I guess my point is; the concept of DID imitation, even if it does exist in some theoretical world, hurts us. It hurt me. It's not ok, and I frankly don't think it should ever be a widely discussed thing for psychologists or at the very least should be treated with EXTREME caution and suspicion. Also, as an end note- I don't talk very often about being plural because of the prejudice, fake-claiming and hatred that seems so widespread, and because of the experience I had with that therapist. I envy systems like you who are confident enough in themselves to give themselves a platform to speak openly and not feel the need to hide who you are. I would give anything to have that level of self-assuredness. To put an entire group of people down as fakers and attention-seekers for not being afraid or ashamed to have their voices be heard- is nothing short of cruelty and aggressive silencing of a group of people who are already dealing with so much pain. Shame on McLean.

[@arcanaandtheimaginarians]

As a mixed Indigenous / Native bodied system who was recently diagnosed with USDD but self dx as DID, thank you so, so much, for mentioning that Black and Indigenous / Native singlets, let alone Black and Indigenous / Native bodied systems, to be researched. We rarely get any representation and although we support each and every system who were invalidated, the fact that a diagnosed Black system, the Pink Sugar Fairies' videos, were used without their consent, is genuinely disgusting, because Black and Indigenous / Native systems get so much more shit than white bodied systems or to a lesser extent, nonblack and nonnative bodied systems, do. I've almost been misdiagnosed, accused of faking, lying, overreacting and being told I'm "sick" and was even almost forced to take antipsychotics by white medical professionals for years and it was only recently this year in January that I was diagnosed with USDD and I expect it'll take longer to get a professional diagnosis on DID. It also doesn't help that we're mixed origins, as well, on top of having DID, so thank you for including OSDD and non-traumagenic systems, because our plurality is also heavily influenced by our culture.

[@francinebacone1455]

@arcanaandtheimaginarians I'm a Plains Cree system, too! There's more than one of us Indigenous bodied systems in this comment section! OMG!! How do we find each other/s? Lol!

[@thechromasystem7476]

Oh my god, we didn't expect to see our VOD linked in your video description. Thank you for your video. This is so well put together and explains things extremely well. Please make sure you're all taking care of yourselves

[@LearningToLinka]

Thank you so much for making this video. We are a system who deals with deep amounts of shame about our DID. And one of the things that our therapists have encouraged is engaging with the DID community, which we currently do at a distance, and trying to talk more openly about our experiences with our friends. Part of our healing is in moving past shame towards acceptance and it’s so concerning that this man seems to want to keep his patients stuck in a state of shame and fear.

[@hoppybirdy6967]

The idea that systems are supposed to be confused *all* of the time is honestly hilarious if you think about it. Like, sure it's gonna take the host some time to get to know all of the alters who are near them, and there may be a lot of exploration to do, but they almost make it sound like the following would have to by a daily experience. Host: *Lives life and does stuff* Literally the alter who talks to them the most: "Hi-" Host: "aAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! wHO ARE YOU????? wHERE DID YOU COME FROM??????" That same alter who talks to them literally every day: *-_-* "...Why did I stop pretending to just be an imaginary friend?"

[@TheAzureSystem]

We are constantly terrified someone will use us as DID cringe or fakeclaim us again so we usually put our accounts on private. I can't believe professionals are doing this now. - Asmodeus

[@System_Spark]

If *all* of this man’s patients have stated they can’t understand being open with the disorder and constantly try to hide or excuse away the symptoms even in front of him, *he* is the problem. He is outing himself as someone who isn’t safe to have those walls come down around. If I am refusing to acknowledge a switch in front of my psychiatrist, I do not feel safe around said psychiatrist. While that may be typical at first, while patients settle in, literally any long term relationship with a psychiatrist needs a certain level of trust. Not having that trust in that relationship is what’s anti-recovery. It seems like every patient leaves without having built that trust, that doesn’t bode well for him as a professional.

[@jaredjordan9863]

First off, you are just fantastic. I hope you keep doing videos and stay well. I just discovered OSDD, but I'm almost 40 now. The label felt more like coming home than a shocking epiphany. For a very long time, I've talked about having a demon alter and feeling like an angel and a demon forced to share the same body. My counselor brought up DID in our last session, but I don't have amnesia. I'll bring up OSDD the next time we meet. My biggest challenge is that my alters are diametrically opposed and hate each other. I guess you can't pick your system mates.

[@angko-pe]

As a new member of the DID community, I felt horrible watching the video you're referring to. When I started to suspect I was one of many parts I went on to KZbin to try and find others with the condition and watching y'alls videos really calmed me and made me feel less alone and like my life wouldn't be over with this diagnosis. So to then have the mclean hospital video discredit everything and everyone, stating that if you have true did you are living in shame and hiding, and that basically everyone I've learned from so far have just been faking it, I couldn't believe it. It also made me scared for what treatment might look like. Will I even be believed if I tell anyone or will they slap me with a bunch of other diagnoses and I'll have to live in shame and hiding for the rest of my life? (Ive told my therapist and she was very supportive and understanding, but this isn't her field of expertise so she's going to have to refer me out). I'm just so sick of living in fear. I've live that way for the most part of my life. I was hoping this diagnosis would not only bring me peace of mind, but also a better understanding of why I am the way I am, and how what I've been through is to blame and not me. I really hated how the video made me feel scared for the future again when I had finally found a place, and a diagnosis, where I felt like I belonged. Thankfully the video didnt make me question the authenticity of any of the systems I've watched and learned so much from. (My apologies for how this message is worded, someone that's not so good with word format is having the time of their life controlling the writing right now)

[@peachdreams]

This is a great example of how harmful these 'professionals' are who speak of things they have zero first-hand knowledge about in a way that shows they feel 'above others'. Anyone 'professional' in mental health who cannot respect others and invalidates another's personal experience, is not someone I'd look up to. For a system to come online and share content in a positive way on DID, that should be celebrated, it's brave and freeing, it's accepting themself. And I'm so glad you found the community! :)

[@Lenergyiskey358]

Me too. I am not new to my alters but am new to the diagnosis. I have spent most of my adult life thinking I was crazy, that I was possessed, that I dont fit, that I am making it all up etc, that to have so called professionals produce a video like that is appauling and truly arrogant. It is hard enough to accept it within yourself especially when you have the blackout times and experience marked changes in your personality, and for those who think they 'know' anothers situation without indepth examination is extremely dangerous and misleasing for the community at large. I for one celebrate those coming out to the public and feel they are very brave. To feel that I am not alone and to have some explaination for my lived experience is priceless. There are people who represent themselves inauthentically in all walks of life, religion, the psychic world, the medical world, politics and many many more situations but it is also extremely inauthentic to think you 'know' that people are misreprepresenting themselves without thorough investigation. There should be a public appology.

[@NaviWolf9]

How is getting more comfortable with your system a bad thing? Like it just makes Us function better and just chill. And only some people know about Our switches. And people are understanding, and that makes Us feel validated and happy. And Our friends have accepted ALL of Us for who We are, and that is good enough for Us. (Getting an official diagnosis helped too, and Our psychiatrist is very chill about plurality) Edit: Apologies, when I say We and Our just talking as all of Us in the system.

[@NaviWolf9]

Edit 2: The part about lacking autonomy or conscious differentiation got Us mad. Would love him to meet one of my headmates. Just the aura around me will change and trust he will know 😅

[@fennwenn3317]

That whole incident was astoundingly unethical. It is, in essence, institutionally approved fakeclaiming, and a terrible precedent to set. The petition seems to be getting traction, so here's to hoping that the backlash makes these sorts of institutions pause and consider more ethical, patient-centered studies in the future. Enforced shame is a major obstacle to improving a system's mental health.

[@goblinguy3103]

I’ve never felt shame about my system. I’ve never wanted our members to hide away. They are full people- not “shards” of me. Professionals like this is why we haven’t been able to get diagnosed.

[@pancake.squirrel]

We loved the Heatherosity parodies! The list of faking is “having a diagnosis, switching too fast, switching too slow, switching wrong, feeling pride ever in your life, and feeling happiness at all ever”. Not all are listed here but man, it made us laugh.

[@chronicmedisorder]

we feel like its absolutely despicable that this happened. fakeclaiming is already horrible and all too common, but as mental health professionals these people should have known how downright harmful this bullshit is. nobody, not even clinicians, can diagnose or undiagnose somebody based off of fucking tiktoks. i hope these people are as ashamed and embarrassed they think we have to be.

[@nerdyenbyandace]

This is so scary to think about. We just recently started sharing our journey online and for us, it was a huge step toward healing and accepting ourselves. We wanted to put our story out there for anyone who is in a similar position and feels alone with this because we felt and still feel very alone sometimes (thx for your content at this point it helped a lot). We are still in the process of getting a diagnosis since our access to the required medical care/specialist is currently restricted, and as most systems, we struggle greatly with fake claiming. To think that someone thinks it'd be okay to just take our content and use it as an example for essentially faking is terrifying. It's like they want us to be ashamed and stay away from the public eye.

[@camillecomeau6939]

If the people he works with are "reluctant, conflicted, confused and ashamed" and those who doesn't are not. I see the reason why. Him!

[@caitlynstreller4363]

The ISSTD doesn't have much credibility- their history is riddled with a lot of really bad controversies and poor reliability and validity evidence in most of their research/presentations. It's still awful and damaging, but not surprising.

[@thepeculiarmaple]

That's good at least. Sucks but hopefully no one hears them out

[@Nukabun]

Considering how much denial is already involved in this disorder you’d think they would do better about fake claiming people or “pointing out fake traits”

[@stygian6642]

Aha. I just realized what this reminds me so strongly of. My brother and stepfather looked me in the face and told me that I didn't really have autism, because autistic people are not able to do the research or find the right words to describe their experiences. I am too "smart" to have autism. The absolute degradation of 'this community can not speak for itself', like in this case the shame being an "integral part" of DID, is so incredibly harmful.

[@Catlily5]

I did research autism and then got officially diagnosed. They don't know what autism is. Even fewer people know what DID is.

[@moomoomellow]

are you kidding me? i have not seen taht video but I did know the Bluebell system and i am just finding out that their videos were used and im so freaking mad right now. they've been gone for over a year now how dare they use their videos...

[@kellydevine5647]

Thank you SO much for this video. We have been so scared to tell about our journey with DID. We definitely needed this. -Jess

[@azarahwagner2749]

Thank you for addressing this … When it comes to mental health ( and I ( host ) am guilty of judging others ) we shouldn’t be gatekeepers of who is authentic and who is acting . And my hesitation to be open is the stigma attached and how others treat us after we disclose our system. And , we get nervous around therapists who push the integration ploy . Like hello … we are all aware of each other and work together as a whole. I ( host ) have no control when and where an alter appears. The young ones do come out when overwhelmed with happiness and joy but not often and the protectors only come out during real or perceived threats . After years of therapy for historic trauma and working together with my alters I/we are able to cope so much better . One of the happiest days we had was when we worked together to choose names for everyone.

[@TheCloverAffiliate12]

One of the things that really disgusts me about this is that, any way you slice it, they knew what they were doing by not contacting those systems, much less evaluating them. I mean, let's face it: Would they really get permission from those systems by saying "Hey, we think you're faking DID-can we use your content and also interview you for proof in front of hundreds and then millions of people?"? Of course not. If they were going about this all ethically, they would have to be transparent about what they would be using the content for. They had to have known. And that makes me irate. Thank you so much for covering this and reminding me that this happened. I started watching Pixie's video and meant to go back to it-I certainly will.

[@SparksArtandCosplay]

How mental health professionals have addressed our system in the past has been warped by our awareness of the system. Because of how we decided to present the idea of us being plural to our parents was through a thorough presentation, and our mother gave that information to our psychologist, they decided that our plurality is delusion. We hate that the box that is thought to professionals is so tiny that it’s almost impossible to convince people of our existence!

[@TheLawSystem]

I just... we literally made a video on system shame, but like?? people posting online about their DID would probably have got past that shame. I know we did! we were conflicted and ashamed and HATED ourselves and our system for the first... year? year and a half? of our system discovery. but we got past that and now we want to spread that so other systems DON'T feel ashamed. just. HATE this presentation. such a great video, so glad to see you all here again -Jonah/mordecai

[@BlueHazyDreams]

I have a lot of deep-seated shame around a lot of things including my plurality, but the idea that the only way I could be seen as legit is if I don't seek to and successfully overcome that shame through healing is extremely limiting and demoralizing. Masking any condition is exhausting and certainly isn't therapeutic.

[@waapfu]

We became familiar with plurality as a concept from talking to systems online, and realised ourselves to be a plural system through hearing about their experiences. Because we had already accepted their plurality and begun working to understand it, we have never felt ashamed of being plural, and we have never felt the need to hide our plurality from our friends. There is still the occasional wave of imposter syndrome, though that is easily combated with logic nowadays. We will never tell a medical professional about our plurality as we suspect it would be used to deny us medical treatment (they already do this with our weight and we are yet to encounter one of those fabled "good doctors"). Plural folks being open about their symptoms and experiences online are so important. They have given us comfort and clarity that we'd never thought possible, and opened the doors to further improvements to our internal wellbeing and understanding of the self. Thank you all so much.

[@ceridwentaliesin798]

Your videos and videos of other proud and conscientious plurals and multiples who were in the midst of healing and creating a life on their own terms helped me feel hopeful and start creating a relationship with the other folks sharing our brain and nervous system. To suggest this community shouldn't exist (because only people with "imitative" DID would put content on social media) is harmful beyond words. When did professionals start diagnosing factitious disorder in people they haven't even examined? How can they lend their perceived authority to the trolls like this? This is so profoundly harmful on so many levels.

[@practicepositiveprogress5396]

I spent 2 months at McLean hospital for an eating disorder and I'm so disappointed to hear them participating in such disgraceful behavior. Even so much as platforming this and posting it online is terrible.

[@CaptainMattnight]

Thank you for keeping an eye on this kind of stuff, for us. I appreciate it greatly.

[@japgolly]

I have so much appreciation for you creating and posting this. Thank you so much for standing up for the community.

[@beatsandpiecesstudio]

I saw that video. I couldn't take it seriously after I saw what he was doing. I unfollowed McLean Hospital channel after that. I'm glad you're talking about it.

[@liberatorynaysayers]

Was any money made off of these presentations? We think if so it should be given to the folks who's videos were used. This is fantastic. We've missed yalls videos, welcome back!

[@TheRingsSystem]

The ISSTD conference had a fee for attendees (I believe it was 400$? But I may be wrong). Unsure about in-person attendance for McLean grand rounds.

[@ebonykimball6579]

I was hoping you'd speak on this topic. Thank you for sharing your views ❤

[@theantiskiasystem2260]

Thank you sooooo much for addressing this !! Our community being able to speak back (tho not on all platforms yet) gives me hope that things will be better in the future.

[@thisbetheverses]

Thank you for such a succinct, concise, informative and powerful response. We feel more empowered and experienced a lot of relief in the form of many sighs and our muscles dropping tension we've been holding as we listened to your points. We feel more pride in our own responses to the McLean video- which we had very mixed feelings about in a lot of us, and there was more fear and shame attacking some of us that we'd been fighting together before watching your video than by the end. We're grateful for that. Your video made a difference for us, we wanted you to know that. - Verses

[@Katie_v]

Thank you for sharing this important information. Appalling stunts like this (disguised as scholarly research, no less) are so harmful that they're often a big reason WHY people with DID, BPD, etc feel shame and want to try and hide their conditions. This rarely happens anymore to people who have ADHD, Autism/Neurodiversity. It feels like the medical "professionals" in this field are 50+ years behind. It's awful and ridiculous. Stay safe everyone. 💕

[@Shadowflyght]

Thank you so much for making such a thoughtful video about this. It really helped us make sense of the things we were feeling around it, and gave the words to rebut those feelings when we get in our head about stuff.

[@ILoveFountainPens]

To me it seems that we're needing to declare our visibility and rights just as much as lgbtq+ have needed to previously, including breaking down the myth that we're dangerous.

[@peachdreams]

100!

[@loserchan2360]

This is absolutely disgusting behavior in the profession especially with a sensitive topic as DID I am appalled

[@North244]

I’m really glad you’ve returned to KZbin!

[@Judoka26]

This is horrible...😢 Thank you for speaking about this topic! ❤

[@Janne_Mai]

Thank you for this. We've been told that we can't have DID at a mental health clinic because we are not ashamed enough and because we don't conceal it (in a therapeutic environment!!). We struggled to put into words why this felt bad. Hearing you talk about it helps. Some of us are ashamed and want to appear normal; some of us aren't (anymore) and just want answers and for things to actually get better. It felt like we had progressed too far (without therapy) so now we're not allowed to start therapy, even though we want to. (We will keep looking in other places, though.) Wouldn't clinicians want their patients to eventually move past the shame?

[@Sandra-hc4vo]

this is awful that this happened. thanks for covering it.

[@c0rktre3]

How dare you come to terms with a disorder that you can’t get rid of and be proud of who you are/looking on the bright side!!!!!!

[@chessgirlhatsune8501]

You're doing the work. Thank you. This was so needed

[@jaelynnrose923]

Thank you for addressing this and making this video. Absolutely agree with everything you said here. Very eloquently stated. The way that hospital handled this topic was extremely harmful and so not ok.

[@dis-obey]

Hello, we are the Lunis from Dis-Obey from Germany. I would like to say thank you for this video. I find this discussion of faking systems showing up a good way to make trauma sequelae invisible. All who show up are "fake", all who are silent do not exist. It is a debate about how to look like a "victim", how to be if you were "truly a victim". But there is no one representation, there is no right or wrong. We can grow, as you also say. We have no reason to feel ashamed because things have been done to us. And then pundits come along who want to talk us into thinking that we have reason to be ashamed? So it seems to me like the statement "shame on you, go back to your shell" which is so toxic that I can't understand how people, professionals can work like that and talk about their clients like that. Because when they talk about us showing up in public, they show their mind set about their own clients, and where they keep them trapped. In shame and kept small. Not even the best diagnosticians have to make remote diagnoses! The best educational work can only come from those who are affected, and not from those who cannot themselves relate to what it means to be DIS. (or otherwise chronically ill). We also often get comments in the direction that we are fake and only out for "fame", because we educate and show ourselves and also show different parts. It is necessary that we show ourselves when we can. And it's sad that we who may be in danger because of it, even if it's "just" cyberbullying (hate to say it that way) have to do that because otherwise we are invisible. Kind regards lunis

[@peachdreams]

It's so good to see you back! :) How invalidating, that's so disappointing. For anyone dealing with this, You know your truth, and that's all that matters. And it's inspiring and brave to talk about DID, and build community, support & education on DID. This in itself is therapeutic and it's about being one's authentic self, having to mask and feeling odd can make one feel inferior, by speaking one's truth and about DID and owning it, I see that as brave and authentic :) Hugs to all!

[@Xypriis]

Hey, stupendous response, love the call out in terms of ethics and siting references! I would LOVE to know your thoughts on a type of therapy I just discovered called IFS or inter family systems therapy; that inherently sees people as multiple! It rocked me to my core, just to hear about it.(online not in treatment) But I know very little so far, and I'm wondering if you know about it, (assuming you might have heard of it) and what your thoughts are on this modality, and way of seeing plurality as inherent to everyone? Thanks for the video, hope to hear your thoughts!

[@andersonsystem2]

Very Good video . The mclane video was not good for helping systems. You did a smashing job mates on this powerful video. Dang you will be an awesome lawyer. And yes we had shame but it does not last forever and yes you can heal.

[@gnlllmm]

Hi, I agree that specific people's videos shouldn't have been used as an example of feigning! I know why he did it, and when you post online that is with an implicit understanding that your content can be reposted and critiqued... but by a doctor in a medical context? That does not feel right. I do think that a real problem on TikTok is the overall very unrealistic portrayal of DID - done in a way that makes the disorder look covetable/simplistic/common/easy to diagnose/with a skewed representation of symptoms. And I think a lot of critics cross the line from "this portrayal of DID is misleading" to "this specific person is faking", which they shouldn't do. They can't know, and it's hurtful. You CAN know when a portrayal wildly differs from the DSM diagnosis. You can know that, while it is so very possible for someone with DID (or any disorder) to live a happy and full life - including accepting and working with their DID - the disorder itself is, by definition, NOT fun. And you can know that TikTok has a young and vulnerable audience that is being mislead into erroneously thinking they have DID because they're not being shown an accurate picture. I know what it's like to be a teen who's very unwell, very isolated, and looking for an answer. If I'd been on TikTok and the various disorder communities, my goodness yes would I have been drawn to the videos cherry-picking symptoms for an easy diagnosis with a fun and accepting community - and that would have taken me further away from getting help with my actual problems. I don't want a solid proportion of these kids to find themselves 5-10 years later being thrust into adulthood with no DID, a long-faded community, and the full force of their original problems that could have been diagnosed and treated years ago - but that's what I can see happening?

[@TheRingsSystem]

Apologies for taking my time to respond - I wanted to do so thoughtfully, and life got away from me. There is a lot of medial misinformation online (eg. incorrect lists of symptoms/diagnostic criteria) which is a serious but distinct issue. To be clear, I am addressing online portrayal (eg. day in the life videos) in this response, as that is what Robinson focused on in his presentation. You raise a lot of points that I agree with about the portrayal of mental illness and it's impact on isolated & unwell teens. You are right -- social media depictions are not accurate to the daily experience of living with any mental illness, and I don't think they ever will be. And you are correct in saying that inaccurate depictions can absolutely be misleading to those who are looking for an answer. However, I don't think we should do anything about this directly, because it would involve expecting vulnerability or censoring the self-expression of disabled people's online. I want to challenge you and say that even though as a whole, DID is not fun, there can be genuinely positive or fun moments with the disorder: and people with DID are allowed to only post about their good moments. They're allowed to post online in a pattern that may, to an outside observer, make their disorder look trivial, or simplistic, or easy to handle. Talking about one's struggles, complex experiences with a diagnosis, and/or bad days (all of which can be vulnerable or shameful to share) should not be a prerequisite for disabled people to exist publicly on the internet -- we aren't entitled to their pain. Instead, I think the deeper issue here is the lack of accurate and educational resources on a variety of mental illnesses, as well as the accessibility of proper mental health care for teenagers. If unwell and isolated teens could safely access such resources, or were taught comprehensively and accurately about mental illnesses offline, they would not have to turn to social media for answers about their experiences. With prior knowledge, they could properly contextualize social media presentations as the inherently inaccurate depictions they are. At the end of the day, this is a failure of our healthcare system. And while frustration with the lack of educational resources is completely understandable, critiquing the online presence of disabled communities places the system's burden of education onto disabled people. Being a representative, vulnerable, and educational resource on social media is a LOT of work (nearly a part-time job or more), and we cannot expect that of disabled people who exist online. I also love to see the conversation shift from "social media portrayals are harmful and misleading" to "social medial portrayals are incomplete." It would allow us to have open conversations about what people don't share and why they don't share it -- combating the stigma and shame that can contribute to such discrepancies in the first place. Presentations like the one I address in the video shut down this conversation, blaming inaccurate portrayals on ulterior motives or malingering rather than societal stigmatization. As I said in the video, I would also love for clinicians to work with people in the DID community who have a significant following. I think it would be a great first step to addressing a lot of your concerns: we could work to create educational content, reach people who wouldn't normally be reached, and direct people to appropriate care.

[@NarwhalAcademy]

We have only told a handful of people (one of whom is our therapist… who does agree that we have one) and most of them have systems. The shame and silence is because of the freaking stigma. We’ve not told people because of these singular clinicians taking stances that people are faking. I (and a few headmates) work in the field. Not going to say exactly how because honestly the stigma within the mental health field is disgusting. I’ve heard other professionals say that no one with a dissociative system would be able to function well enough to hold down a job. Not having any clue they’re sitting next to a system that works with them every day. The ONLY reason those of us who hide it are so persistently hiding it is because of clinicians like this. They are causing so much harm to already very traumatized people. So to claim that shame, confusion, concealment are inherent to the symptomatology is to claim that DID/OSDD is inherently WRONG. I still have so much distress about it, as do a lot of my headmates, but when we’re interacting with other systems and other people who support systems we don’t feel it NEARLY as much. Which means it’s a societal problem. Seeing systems like yours talking on social media has been a huge part of me in particular accepting having a system and starting to work on healing. I didn’t choose this. I didn’t wish for this. I did develop this for survival. My friend telling me his wife has DID and then getting to know his wife and him better and having them assure us that it’s not something to be ashamed of (over and over 😂) … they’ve known about her DID most of their over-a-decade relationship… has been huge in moving through the shame. We need community. And in a society largely connected through social media that includes social media. Why the HELL would I feel comfortable in a support group specifically run by singular clinicians perpetuating stigma of DID/OSDD? I feel comfortable in discords, and social media communities. Could some people be faking for attention? Sure. A lot more of us are trying to convince ourselves we’re not faking I think. Especially those of us with OSDD.

[@TheRingsSystem]

If you contact the plural association, they run a group for plural clinicians! (Many of whom aren’t out to singlet clinicians). I’ve heard great things

[@ceridwentaliesin798]

Thank you *so* much for this video. It was a shock, but I appreciate you taking on the abuse and false information . Pretty shocked about Brand. I had considered her an ally.

[@LostAndSortaHighVibes]

Could you file a personal complaint to their local medical board? This seems to violate several ethics rules and possibly ethics laws.

[@ILoveFountainPens]

So glad to see you back!

[@BoredPodcaster]

There's nothing worse than so-called "professionals" who assert bad faith arguments to support a claim. Their job is supposed to be to curtail misinformation, not proliferate it.

[@VerityDemortem]

Thank you for this.

[@drcloudy]

YOU GUYS ARE AWESOMEE!!! Commenting for engagement also.

[@fenrik8178]

Not sure why this video is in my recommended, but really sucks that people with DID who want to share their experiences online so often get discredited apparently. Some people just suck. Vaguely reminds me of when people tell me I don’t ‘look autistic’. I always wonder what an autistic person should look like according to them....

[@fenrik8178]

*me a little later in the video*: Wait not having shame is anti-therapeutic?! What? I thought therapy is mainly supposed to help people find coping mechanisms that work for them and definitely one of the end goals is to have people not feel ashamed of themselves. I don’t understand neurotypicals sometimes. (At least I’m assuming most people claiming these things are not neurodivergent, or they must have a lot of internalized ableism and feel like they’re better than other neurodivergent people)

[@sarahgolley4086]

What gets me is that this is a disorder that causes people to be emotionally detached and yet they are surprised that people with it got jokes. Like the feelings haven't registered yet lol

[@sygilloux-v2]

omg yes, the community existing helped me stop feeling shame, i didnt pick existing like this, its not my shame to hold.

[@spinny-kitten]

decrease in shame, confusion, guilt and feeling the need to hide are signs of healing, which makes this inherently anti recovery and completely unethical to say as someone in working on the field of psychology and psychiatry

[@L0v30fTh3___]

I know this isn’t really related but it is something that has been stressing me for a while now, i have several neurodivergences (between them dislexia so sorry for my typo) and i’m alreayd kinda used to that but sometimes i don’t feel like myself and feel like if my personality was different/from another person (not exactly from someone that i know) but i still identify has the same person! It is confusing and it is like someone have taken my mind and changed my personality but still identify with my identity. for example, In a moment i feel like my usual self and then i feel like if my personality just switched and sometimes when it happens it is like that personality if i can say it that way doesn’t like my friends and i wanna stop hanging with them for a while until i change to another one or get back to my usual self, it’s not somethign i can control and one of them that it seems to appear the most is a more raged one and it’s hella confusing, sometimes i feel it stronger than otehr times and have to stop to analyze it.

[@graymonk5972]

i was finally officially diagnosed with DID and our therapist said that while we don’t meet the general criteria for all DSM 5 diagnoses of feeling distressed by our symptoms (being a system) but that it’s not specifically a requirement of DID. we also have narcissistic personality disorder so we don’t feel shame for most things about us, so it makes sense for us to not feel embarrassment for being a system or switching. it’s almost like every psychological condition has variations amongst everyone who has it!!

[@Theantinarc]

I'm just learning about my dissociation but it took me close to a year to even mention my voices in therapy out of fear of not being believed or that I'm just crazy and making things up. I do feel shame however so do sexual assault victims (which I am also) but when SA victims come out and tell their story we call them brave. Shame on him. He sounds like a typical abuser trying to stop victims from being honest.

[@alysmarcus7747]

Thanks for covering this ! very important. as for this Robinson character - i've likely dealt with his kind misdiagnosing or calling people liars before they interview 'the client' for at least 3 months. It s bad enough that people crave dramatic competition with each other. - the professionals - should know better and behave thus. At 13 minutes to what you said, i am of the age of the old school that you don't talk about anything, never mind DID. Because of videos of very brave and clever people -there are a few that i follow - has helped me very much in supportive ways continuing on my own after the death of my doctor. Cheers to you - Use your voices

[@CharlieTheMad256]

Wait did I hear correctly that the isstd used bluebells content as examples of feign DID? After they passed away? What the hell????

[@SA-tb9di]

This makes me so mad tbh that they're saying that stuff abt the DID community. You ligit can not fake DID without knowing you're faking

[@niumoficial]

Thank you for making this video

[@AntojO1er]

Thank youuuuus so much 🎈Sending love, hope and faith.❤‍🔥 We're preparing more content to keep up the global sharing ❣

[@jennifertodd7454]

🙌🏻🙌🏻thank you so much💙

[@spaceybun]

Thank you for making this.

[@sharonpaquette9476]

Brilliant. Damn. They cannot refute you.

[@kalaidescopes]

Thank you so much👍🏻💙

[@BevChoy]

I’m not shamed at all… what I am, is scared. Of people like the people of McLean.

[@LandOfTheEnigma]

Hi! I enjoy your videos so much but we have been thinking we(?) are a system but we are not diagnosed and are pretty unsure about the whole thing. One of us feels fearful about being a system and not just unsure and have been feeling a ton of guilt about it. Like we arent valid because we havent been diagnosed/havent been aware about 'being a system' for as long as others sorry for the long comment but just had to express emotions Love ur content !

[@erinsmith4119]

Thank you for talking about this

[@jujuuu1]

thank you for what you do

[@thepeculiarmaple]

11:50 Yeah, I have to click off here. Too awful. I appreciate you sharing this. Yick

[@ViewerEm]

this news sucks but also im loving the new glasses

[@Brownieizfaded]

Using this comment to test if negative/disagreeing comments are being deleted. I see nothing but support. I wont state my detailed opinions for fear of being completely dog piled but i will say i disagree with your video. All i see is supportive comments when i know that there has to be people who disagree as well. If youre so afraid of people disagreeing (or even leaving very mean comments, which i will admit, does happen) then please turn off your comments instead of creating an echo chamber to spread medical and psychiatric misinformation.

[@TheRingsSystem]

We're back - the reality is that all our comments are held for review. They're automatically deleted by the system after one month if not approved, and we stopped checking/approving a month or two after the video. (so any comments about a month or two after the video were posted, got unfortunately deleted. I caught yours 3 weeks after you commented). We try to approve all comments that aren't hateful/misconstruing, but it can be hard to keep up. Especially when we have been on an indefinite break (outside of this video). We're going to try to be more on top of it in the upcoming months however.

[@Gedankenwald]

Thank you so much - coming from s/o being both a professional and a survivor. ❤❤❤