sometimes, i'm the problem

[@gabi8750]

“running away does not solve your problem if you are the problem” i had to pause at this. this made me realize how many of my issues are rooted with my own insecurities

[@MichelleGia]

we are all human❤️and we make mistakes, the best thing we can do is recognize it and grow from it:) your self awareness is commendable & I believe you will take the right steps to keep becoming a better version of yourself!

[@muerte88888]

I feel like questioning if you’re a good person already kind of makes you a good person, because bad people wouldn’t really stop and think ”is this a right thing to do?” ”am I hurting someone?” Or ”am I being my authentic self instead of telling people what they want to hear?”

[@zofiasitarska3615]

omg i was literally about to put this, the fact that michelle has that self awareness i think doesn’t make her a bad person. what makes a good person good anyways? we all make mistakes, we’re going to lie sometimes🤷‍♀️ it’s just life

[@muerte88888]

@@zofiasitarska3615 oh nice coincidence😅 and yeah it’s a therm that people have made and it’s pretty subjective actually. And yes because I also believe that perfection doesn’t exist and things aren black and white or necessarily good or bad.

[@MichelleGia]

awe i love you guys❤️ so much, I cant ever thank you enough for your kindness

[@muerte88888]

@@MichelleGia you’re welcome 💗 and yeah that would be a good way to think about it, but it’s not your fault that you have thought that people are either good or bad, because that’s what we have been teached our whole lifes.

[@maddy4690]

My god. Thank you so much for giving hopes about myself.💗 From my childhood, i have been beating myself up for being sometimes judgemental or discarding people (also having horrible thoughts that i was not supposed to have.) But only now i came to know i have quiet bpd. I feel more horrible cuz image of bpd people is not good but i questioned myself that if i was bad then why I tried to change myself and come off more nice, kind? I was aware of the damage i was causing (it was unintentional and realised later) but i worked on it. I am afraid of myself because i don't intend to do any of those things, as if my brain is controlling me.

[@ashlyndrew]

i needed this, your vulnerability is extremely refreshing and relatable. i am in a period of feeling really lost too. we are all just humans, trying to do our best. your self awareness is inspiring and you deserve all the kindness you receive. ❤️

[@MichelleGia]

Hey❤️ im so glad i could help in any way:) you are never alone, and just as much as we struggle together, we will also succeed together! Thank you for the sweet words, wishing nothing but love and happiness for you

[@MichelleGia]

the thought demons have won this round, but we will get em next time! Anyywhoo, this video is 100% a ramble, but I wanted to get a little raw and vulnerable td, so I hope you find some comfort in my talk

[@swftvholics]

your videos are always so comforting!!

[@MichelleGia]

@@swftvholics Im so happy you think so🥺❤

[@e.globulus]

as long as you keep wondering whether you are a good person or not, you will be. and if you sometimes are not, then you will know in yourself that you did the best you could, with the best intentions, under the existent circumstances.

[@rainemorinho355]

i’m in a rlly dark time rn and i found your channel at the perfect time. i just want to say watching your vids make me so happy and calm and i don’t feel so alone

[@MichelleGia]

I hope youre doing okay/better now❤️ ily, & im so glad youre here

[@faith3609]

The things i wanted to advice to you because you always advice on us is “Your Significance Is Not In Your Similarity To Another, But In Your Point Of Difference From Another.”

[@MichelleGia]

Thank you so much❤️I honestly really needed to hear that:)

[@wenliu4153]

This was very refreshing to see. Being vulnerable is a step to self growth. I've personally felt like running away at relationship problems when it is my fault because I think it's easier to end a relationship rather than trying to fix it. I'm working on making an effort to admit my mistakes and patch things up if it's my fault. Thank you so much for these self improvement videos Michelle!!!

[@MichelleGia]

I feel you exactly❤️I always have a hard time determining what is acceptable to walk away from and what is just simply me running from my problems. Understanding is the first step to getting better:) & I applaud you for your self awareness, wishing you all the best on this journey!

[@101amazingdude]

unpopular opinion but you don't need to be a completely "good" person to live the best life possible. what makes life so colorful is that we all have good and not-so-good sides, no one is totally one or the other but rather a mix of both. it sounds like you're in need of finding a way to healthily integrate your shadow villain self into your socially acceptable, "good" self. try finding a balance, change what's within your control, and accept and forgive your mistakes. the reason why you may be avoidant is because that's your instinct detecting danger and protecting you from getting hurt. however, you may be hurting yourself more in the long run by not confronting certain things. personally, i love being the villain. being good all the time is unrealistic, and sometimes situations require you to misbehave a little. all love michelle

[@swftvholics]

growth is so important, sometimes we aren't good people but none is perfect, we all should focus to be the best version of ourselfs but its not gonna happen overnight. patience is key :)

[@MichelleGia]

i love that

[@fred-nu8in]

we all feel things and sometimes we lose ourselves it’s apart of growing you have a beautiful soul and beautiful will only come with time

[@MichelleGia]

Thank you Fred❤️ it means so much:) wishing you happiness and love

[@Ava-nu7he]

ilysm :) I feel the same way a lot of the time. Your channel saved me and helped me so much. I relate so much to a high extent and i love watching your videos to grow and evolve and create a better version of myself. Creating this channel was the best idea ever loves

[@MichelleGia]

ily, thank you for the sweet words🥺im so glad that I could help in any way, im wishing you the best on your self improvement journey

[@Pokedrifter]

I think the videos you do are very helpful and they resonate with a lot of people including myself. I think the most important thing to remember is that we all make mistakes. Sometimes we mess up. Sometimes it’s the other person who messed up. Either way as time goes by and we learn and try to improve ourselves, we soon realize and acknowledge that forgiveness is necessary to truly love yourself. Accepting whatever it is you’ve done and accepting that it was the best you could do at the time. But those hard moments do not define you. You are not your mistakes. It doesn’t matter how you start, It matters how you finish. Never give up trying to be a better you🖤

[@brandonhorsford]

You’ve come to a realization that we can be selfish as Humans and the human experience is sometimes rocky but then it’s smooth also. You’ve recognized your errors but the main thing is Forgiving yourself & others. We’re all taking it a day at a time right? We’re here to LEARN

[@MichelleGia]

thank you for the words, you explained it perfectly

[@brandonhorsford]

@@MichelleGia 🌹 🌹 🌹

[@lilaodermorado9796]

this is exactly what i’ve been feeling these days and you put that into words, most of the time i always tell myself that i know what the fck i’m doing in my life, and the other time my shadow self creep in and tell me if i am doing everything right or i am missing something, i just don’t know but i do know very much there are always people out there who feel this way so we’re in this together. And the only thing that i can do now is to do what feel right for me and enjoy it as much as i can. ❤️

[@MichelleGia]

i understand you completely, I always go in and out of these moods where im feeling okay and others where im just completely lost:( but it happens to everyone and its normal to question things, you are never alone❤️

[@Gloroxsocks]

I’m the villain too, I rly thought I was in the right, thought I was a burden for being depressed and resented so many people for not being there for me when I was in a difficult relationship but I just messed up so much, stopped talking to all of my friends and now they’ve moved on

[@c.6818]

hi, had these thoughts a while back but then realized in general nobody really does know what they're doing. Like yea people do stuff, make plans, say things, and have values but in general we're all just trying to live life the best way we know how. Sometimes I swear the older I get the less I really know.

[@MichelleGia]

haha thats exactly how i feel:) the older i get the more confusing things become and I never know if its because i know more or because i know less. But youre right, it does happen to everybody:) all that matters is that we're enjoying life as best as we can!

[@erichopham]

Girl I feel the same, I’m also constantly feeling like I’m behind, but in comparison to what? (Basically the whole internet lol) but I just feel a lil stuck too, and it always happens around this time of year too, my birthday is in October and I always feel like I’ve achieved nothing since my last birthday and it always makes me lowkey upset at myself. I dream of running away too but you’re right it is unrealistic

[@MichelleGia]

I get you:( birthdays are always the worst for me too, I always reflect on my past year and feel like I’m never doing enough. But trust me it’s something that we all go through & you’re not alone. I think it’s good to embrace change and letting what’s not good for us go, but sometimes running can make things worse if we don’t address the root issue. I trust you will do what is best for you tho:) you have time, don’t worry🫶🏼 And happy bday!!

[@LaosHouse]

Instead of scared of failure and leaving the comfort zone, we should embrace it. be comfortable of being uncomfortable.

[@MichelleGia]

I agree 100%☺️!!

[@andrewgdo0]

I can really relate to this. Life can be scary, but it’s nice to know I’m not alone :)

[@MichelleGia]

It really can be:( but trust me we are in this together:)

[@icesomboon6985]

Thank you so much for this video michelle. I resonate to every part of what you said. I feel like the more I grow up, the world becomes more gray than black & white. I question myself many times whether I am still a good person when I made so many mistakes… I’d like to think that I’m someone who always has positive energy and good intentions for everyone around me. But there are times when I made conscious mistakes and it seems like those define me more than the good things I’ve done. Anyways, thank you for being so brave and sharing this…it must have been a difficult video to post, but I want to reassure you that I appreciate it so much.

[@HaloJayy]

Gotta know how to hold yourself accountable when you know u are the problem and seek out what can u do to change for the better

[@julialaskar]

Your always my favourite youtuber from the beginning. Your thoughts, mindset, actions, everything. I see copy of myself in you. This made me so relax. Thank you 😊

[@MichelleGia]

ahh that is so sweet, thank you so much, im so happy we can relate🫶🏼🥰

[@dehhota]

6:30 i'm glad you said this, having the ability to be self aware to this degree nowadays is quite rare

[@MichelleGia]

hehe, it took a while to realize, but it is def worth it🫶🏼

[@BenIsFiguringitOut]

Michelle, as usual, you have a video that reminds us that we’re all going through the same ish trying to make it through life. I could relate to several points you made. Stay encouraged.

[@MichelleGia]

thank you Bennett:) im glad you could relate, you are never alone! wishing you well

[@whossevn]

not gonna lie saw this on my home page and my first thought why is this on my recommended, but with all respect and no hate. once i was 1:30 in the video I definitely relayed to you about feeling lost and wanna rebrand every year for the better or etc. but definitely love the whole aesthetic of your channel and the message you push your videos and definitely should do more sit down videos like this or even start a podcast because that’s what it felt like what I was watching and keep up the good work ❤️

[@MichelleGia]

Hi

[@LaguBudakKuching]

I've also been feeling a little lost recently! I relate with some parts of this vode, glad to know I'm not alone.

[@MichelleGia]

you are never alone

[@alieneargaming4687]

why does this video feels like video call? it feels personal like it is me and you , i also found out that if you nod your head that increases the immersion , i love this style of video!!!😍😍😍

[@MichelleGia]

ahhh im so glad it gave that feeling❤️I love connecting with you guys, so glad i could do that in this vid:)

[@SunriseKid13]

i think we just have to accept that were humans and that sometimes we do stuff that were going to regret or choose the wrong thing/option, ive learned to look back and accept my choices and "try" to be a better person, key word is "TRY" doesnt mean you wont make same mistakes again but just trying and learning is what matters. As long as i know that im trying to be a better person for myself thats what matters. one thing i do is i talk a lot shit about people in my head, i make sure not to say it outloud since i dont wanna cause drama/issues but i reflect on the things i say and TRY rethink the stuff ive said. A good example latelty is the whole gender thing, personally i dont get the whole he/him/she/her/they/them but ive meant ppl that go by those nouns which i TRY my best to work with but i usually just stick to the name/nickname they use. i may never understand completely the whole noun thing but knowing that i try is makes feel better. Another thing is judging a person before knowing them, i know its commonly said to not judge a book by its cover but i do it, i try not too since ive been wrong before but i can usually say my judgment is 80-90% correct for example if i see a person with an edgar haircut and talking in certain way my mind is already judging them and expecting them to say certain things that check off the list. Now i have been wrong and my mind has judge them so far that havent give them a fair chance but when im wrong i tell them and apologize. i judged one of my pervious coworkers thinking she was going to be rude and mean when really she was the nicest person there and became one of my closet friends there. i told her about it and luckily for me she laughed it off

[@GBParz]

hella trippy watching u say everything i think about

[@MichelleGia]

that is what i am here for🫶🏼

[@eliosingh]

Im so happy i found your channel i can relate so much

[@MichelleGia]

I’m so happy you’re here🫶🏼

[@harunol-d3v]

Hii Michelle ,In my opinion I think it's good that you are acknowledging things ,but you should always remind yourself whatever mistake you did is not always going to be fixed ,and the only thing you could do about that is to move on and do better in any similar situation, it will take time so be patient and strong as you always are

[@steenie3216]

Hi Michelle I swear ur not the only one doing self reflections❤

[@MichelleGia]

🥹❤️

[@this_crab]

Michelle! If you feel like a fraud, don’t. The fact that you put out videos about healing and improving and maybe glamorize a bit things you went through doesn’t mean anything. It’s the internet, you can’t and will not show every single thing that happens to you. Your videos bring comfort to lots of people and even if you feel bad for putting on a mask of “everything is fine”, it doesn’t change the fact that your channel is a safe space for all of your viewers. I get your struggle and I’m not surprised that you have moments of weakness and self doubt, every person that has a great insight into their own mind and is self aware has them, and while your videos show the bright side of that, the dark side stays only in your reality. I struggle a lot with self loathing, weird made up ideas about my life and future, and feeling like my best years are already behind me and I didn’t appreciate them enough. Fall and winter are very hard for me, and I’m constantly scared of the future. However it doesn’t change the fact that I’m always trying and not giving up (yet 😝). You should always appreciate every single step you made in the right direction. I had to learn it the hard way. Stay strong Michelle 🧡🧡🧡 let’s stay strong together

[@MichelleGia]

awe Jules thank you so much for your comment and always taking time to write such thoughtful messages to me❤️I really can never express how grateful I am for you:) reading this made my entire month. Im honoured to be that safe space for you guys, and I hope I can continue to do that. I feel you exactly, I tend to overthink myself into bad moods and its honestly normal sometimes as long as we can bounce back remember that bad moments are bound to occur from time to time. I know you will be okay, and whatever you decide to do in the future it will be great🫶🏼 these seasons will be tough but we'll get through it

[@this_crab]

@@MichelleGia thank you so much 🥺💖 take care please 🧡

[@heemzzz]

same ive been a mess and lost for like 4 years now 😭😭

[@MichelleGia]

i feel you dw:( we'll get through this together❤️!

[@chosen558]

thank you for posting this video 💗

[@MichelleGia]

its a pleasure❤️

[@troyvlahakis4731]

Thanks for the therapy session - a part of me needed to hear this :')

[@MichelleGia]

so glad i could help❤️

[@aaliyah2637]

you just explained everything going on in my head wow

[@MichelleGia]

🥺🫶🏼

[@Kxdmia]

Please keep posting…you’re by far the first person on KZbin, who’s videos actually resonates with me deeply. 🥹💗🫶🏾

[@MichelleGia]

awe of course🥺🫶🏼im so happy to hear

[@Kevnslife]

I only saw a couple of your videos and rarely comment. The way you can talk about your feelings and thoughts so openly makes you so powerful in my eyes. You are truly transparent with us, your community, or strangers from a different country.. Thanks for being you!

[@MichelleGia]

Thank you so much❤️your comment really means a lot to me, I appreciate this community more than words can explain and I feel like it’s the least I can do:) Sending you much love, lovely vids btw:)

[@AZ-gf4kz]

Wow!! Michelle really spoke our minds

[@MichelleGia]

🥺❤️

[@kelechiememanka]

First! Love your videos btw🥺💕

[@MichelleGia]

OMG HI❤ILY, thank you that means a lot!

[@Whoever3322]

Thank you for sharing this

[@MichelleGia]

❤️❤️❤️ofc!

[@caramelgirl6962]

You are so loved, omg your channel is amazing

[@MichelleGia]

I’m going to cry, ily

[@saucelys]

this resonates with me so much

[@MichelleGia]

❤️❤️❤️

[@Averyliz23]

Sorry in advance for my long comment. The future is always going to be scary, and hear me on this next point before you let that scare you. Humans are multifaceted. We will never be black and white. Which means there’s always space to be a “bad” person on the scale of good vs. bad. That’s why you fear not being a good person. Maybe you hurt someone by dating them and then realizing you no longer wanted to be with them. I don’t know… but the important part is that all humans are at our core not black and white. We might help pay for someone’s groceries and then proceed to think something mean about someone we see at a restaurant later that evening. But where do we draw the line of good when we are talking about multifaceted beings? For instance Fritz Haber created a process that estimated to supply ammonia for 1/3rd of the worlds annual food supply. (It’s used in fertilizer.) He won the Noble Prize for Chemistry in 1918 for this. This would make you think Haber is a good man. Yes? Now what if I told you Haber is also known as the “Father of Chemical Warfare”? Now not so much… His work, without his involvement, was used to create the gas that was used in the gas chambers during WW2. Now you’re thinking that’s a bad man yes? He was a German who made it much easier to obtain the gas to murder Jewish people. Now you should probably know he was Jewish. The point I am trying to again make is that humans aren’t meant to be as black and white as “am I a good person?” I think the question that you might consider asking yourself is “Am I a caring person?” “Am I a considerate/compassionate/conscientious person in how I treat those around me?” I think those questions would answer what you seem to actually be trying to ask yourself. And maybe I’m misreading I’m sorry if I am. One philosophy I personally prescribe to that I think you might want/need to hear is this: I don’t judge past me because I can’t change past me. I won’t fret over her decisions and wish I had done things differently, because at the end of the day those decisions brought me to where I am. Without those decisions I wouldn’t get to experience this moment, right now. You can always learn from past decisions, plan to not make them again, but constantly stressing and judging someone who can’t do anything about it anymore is just a way to constantly put yourself down.

[@theneattie9665]

Babe I think we can make it .....we well get it together and better

[@MichelleGia]

babez I KNOW we can❤️

[@jessicasantanna3284]

Giiiirl, those are completely normal questions and fears. I think you could benefit from reading about super ego aka the ideal self (for your fear of failure), attachment theory (for your avoidance) and the 7 fundamental emotions/needs from panksepp (for a better understanding of why you behave the way you do). And, of course, talk to a therapist about it.

[@MichelleGia]

thank you so so much for the suggestions and the kind words🥺❤️ i really appreciate it and I will definitely check them out:) wishing you all the best!

[@flowmotion_2]

I fuck with your honesty

[@MichelleGia]

thank you🫶🏼

[@MarshleB]

Im simple i see Michelle Gia i clickkkk 💕

[@MichelleGia]

awe thank you!!😭❤️

[@qutaibamajdi3215]

I can 100% relate to this 💔💔😃

[@MichelleGia]

i get you dont worry🥺❤️

[@Gigi-xx7gq]

I feel so relaxed watching ur Videos 🥺

[@MichelleGia]

🥺❤️

[@maryzulu7976]

bar for bar

[@MichelleGia]

🫡🤝

[@nicnic2819]

Needed this ❤️ also are you still off all social media platforms? Do u ever plan on going back?

[@MichelleGia]

so glad to hear❤️for now i am hehe, maybe in the future i might, but im not sure if it will be anytime soon:)

[@lolgreenwood7038]

Have no clue what your apologizing for but your forgiven

[@MichelleGia]

thank you🤝 it is greatly appreciated

[@gabsterschannel6244]

I love the rain tho bestie

[@MichelleGia]

i love her too, but unfortunately she does not love me back⛈

[@LorenzoMarch]

100% know what you mean. You seem like a great person and you’re super cute! Lol

[@MichelleGia]

awe thank you🥺🫶🏼im glad you understand!

[@khansaasakar]

Its really courageous to be vulnerable Also may b if u like reading try reading 'secrets of divine love' It was soo helpful for me

[@MichelleGia]

Thank you for the words and thank you for the suggestions❤️I really appreciate it:)

[@lilnightmare]

This should have been an ASMR

[@MichelleGia]

one day🫡🤞🏼

[@heemzzz]

our led lights the same colour on some twin fr

[@MichelleGia]

the ones who get it, get ittt💅🏼👯

[@fatu011]

us moment

[@MichelleGia]

indeed

[@oneleonie9892]

you are so pretty.

[@MichelleGia]

thank you🥺🫶🏼

[@berrie7311]

Love this vlog, you are so inspiring 😍 I also just made a vlog video! 💕

[@MichelleGia]

awe thank you!!

[@yventualS2]

discovering yourself and prospectives on life can be a really difficult journey

[@MichelleGia]

it definitely is:( but so worth it:)

[@reneegonzalez2633]

I love youuuu ❤️‍🩹

[@MichelleGia]

i love youuu🥺❤️

[@dehhota]

hey Michelle Gia 🤤

[@MichelleGia]

howdy!

[@nichoasmr]

Sometimes i love you