The EASY Way To Win Back An AVOIDANT Ex

[@sshuteandrew]

It may be easier to get the avoidant back than a secure or anxious, but the secure or anxious wouldn’t have ran out the door to begin with.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Whatever the attachment style has in reference to dealing with an avoidant, it all really boils down to how much they're willing to understand and put up with an avoidant behaviour...that is something within their control. Some avoidants are oblivious while others are actively seeking therapy. The former are the toughest to deal with so I guess you can't really blame the partner if they throw the towel, regardless of their own attachment style.

[@zetrioxpk9716]

I'm not gonna lie, I would take her back no matter what. I just miss her

[@KarmaDivinity]

Same here, I would. Actually after 30D that is now, and since the checking in text from her, I think is time to establish a connection

[@Jyroxcarib]

I’m not gonna lie I was missing my avoidant ex for like 2 years, then I had an epiphany about how I deserve better she wasn’t trying to better herself I have tried a few times the day she disrespected me was the day I chose myself not gonna lie she tought me how to respect myself i got her back twice the third time she was so rude I was like … there is no way I take her back, had to do so much healing now looking back that was the best decision ! I want to settle and have a stable family ! What was funny I moved country to have a fresh start I heard she moved as well 2 months after….Wish her all the best but without me !

[@jamie-r2034]

@@zetrioxpk9716 No man. I was with an avoidant for 12 years and even now while I feel the hurt, I'm only thinking about the fun things we did together. We had lots of great times & talks but it's a mental game you have to be prepared to take on. The last few months I was having panic attacks each night, not sleeping well, etc, etc. I sleep like a baby now that I left. Funny thing is, she didn't want me to even leave our house - she wanted the perks though like me cooking, cleaning, etc. Im better than that & not a bad looking guy, so I'm going on some trips by myself & doing what i want! Life is truly too short

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

There's no such thing as a perfect marriage or relationship; each one is special. What makes one person happy might not make another person happy. But I've realized that there's always a way to solve problems. Five years ago, my wife and I were almost getting divorced because we had problems in our marriage, but we managed to sort things out. It was a difficult time, but we got through it.

[@oglaskubuot]

I really want to be happy too. I'm in a relationship, and even though we're apart now, I can't think of life without her; my love for her is big. I really miss her, and I'm determined to bring her back. We've tried different ways, like therapy, to fix things.

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

Releasing the grip on someone dear is always tough, but in my scenario, I was fortunate to have the counsel of a spiritual guide who preserved my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.

[@oglaskubuot]

I'm grateful for your guidance. I'll quickly search for her online. Thanks. I'm hopeful that adopting this strategy will also bring me the results I desire; I miss her greatly.

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

You should....You will find her amazing.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That's right. There's no perfect relationship/marriage. You just have to find someone who's worth all the trouble/pain/challenges that tends to present itself every now and then.

[@DanHoller-eb6xt]

if an avoidant habitually runs from you, but still desires the relationship, it is on them that needs to work on themselves. i’ve tried my best but i can’t “fix” what i didn’t break. i need to be treated as i treat others.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Right. As mentioned on this vid, you have some important questions to ask yourself and not expect things to change anytime soon unless they try to seek out therapy and get help.

[@sshuteandrew]

Good reminders to be patient so you don’t push them away with your anxiety. Very helpful, as long as they are willing to move forward.

[@saralynn699]

I literally just pushed him away w anxiety, just as soon as he was coming close to me again 😢

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thanks, right. More useful tips here, too. It delves a little deeper on what you can do on your end and what questions to ask yourself if you're dealing with an avoidant: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jqDWZI1qnZl7hKc

[@EthelHill-h9d]

Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.

[@SK-no2pp]

You need therapy too for you childhood trauma. When you find yourself in a relationship with an avoidant partner and feel that the emotional labor is imbalanced, it's crucial to reflect on why you might be willing to accept such a dynamic for yourself. Relationships are not supposed to be work - they are a refuge from work. They do require effort, but it's effort that ultimately deepens connection and uplifts you both. Instead of finding ways to tolerate the intolerable, consider if you are repeating patterns from your early attachment experiences. Do you believe you deserve a balanced, reciprocal partnership? Identity any limiting beliefs that might be causing you to settle for less, such as "I have to work hard for love" or "I'm not worthy of a partner who meets my needs." Consider the hidden rewards of always being the one initiating emotional support - does that make you feel needed, or more in control? If someone didn't need you, why would they love you? Understand that you deserve a partnership where emotional labor is shared equally. Look for relationships where mutual respect and reciprocity are present. These are the foundations of a healthy and fulfilling partnership.

[@marguskiis7711]

I can bet, he will be back when you find another man.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thanks for sharing!

[@Mariacorazon-p7d]

It’s almost more than 58 years since we didn’t have communication but still missing him

[@SK-no2pp]

@@Mariacorazon-p7d wow

[@robertdeskoski9783]

Brad, if acting 'clingy' or showing care, wanting time together, wanting connection and communication is an issue for that person, they need to be up front about that. But avoidant people often aren't because they initially love the attention and affection, until they get overwhelmed.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

They have active --oftentimes exaggerated -- boundaries for sure. Please watch this to get more tips where I explained more about avoidants in-depth: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jqDWZI1qnZl7hKc

[@robertdeskoski9783]

@@breakupbradbrowning: I'm a psychologist. I've read 'Trauma and the Avoidant Client'. I'm good with attachment theory, thanks.

[@Apbt-rv7zw]

For some reason you coaches seem to think that only Anxious get with Avoidants. You forget that Avoidants are experts at appearing Secure in the early stages of a relationship. Avoidants can really present as Secure up until they no longer can. For this reason even Secures are caught in the Avoidants clever trap. If the Avoidant isn't willing to work on their attachment style and childhood traumas. Then run and keep running because it will be a long loop of heart aches. You forgot to mention how skilled Avoidants are at cheating in a relationship. This part of their sabotaging the relationship and need to create distance.

[@marguskiis7711]

Right

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That's true to some degree. This is why you guys ought to take your time in getting to know someone before committing further. But no, infidelity is not solely restricted to having an avoidant attachment style because it's certainly present in all attachment styles, especially if communication goes down the drain during the relationship.

[@Apbt-rv7zw]

@breakupbradbrowning Yes all attachments have infidelity problems. You never mentioned this at all for Avoidants, yet Avoidants strategically use this in order to sabotahe create distance in relationships.

[@777-h6n]

And cheat while distant from you. They just want their cake and eat it too😂

[@adoptioncorner1984]

This was a great explanation, thank you

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thank you. Please like and subscribe to my channel so I can post more videos like this. Also feel free to check out my other channel for more tips, here: www.youtube.com/@BradBrowning/videos

[@arankagionetti2098]

Avoidant always come back bread cumbing you! Wash rinse spin and repeat! end of story

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! Some, but not all. This is something I discussed here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jqDWZI1qnZl7hKc

[@kanereall]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to move on, I really loved her so much i can’t stop thinking about her and the memories we shared. I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail. I’m frustrated, and i don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts, but i can’t. I don’t know why I’m saying this here, but i really miss her and i wish i could get her back.

[@MoloSaidu]

I have been in such a situation. My relationship ended about three years ago, but i could not let her go. So i had to do all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back. We are back together, and i must say i am enjoying every moment.

[@kanereall]

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach one?

[@MoloSaidu]

Her name is Maurice Gleti, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

[@kanereall]

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

[@breakupbradbrowning]

If it's only been a month and you still want to try with your ex, then you can reach out to your ex after the 30-day "no contact" period is over. In doing so, it's best to treat the situation with fresh eyes, so it's crucial to keep things fun and light and gently coax your ex into responding the same way. Here are the basics on what to do when it comes down to it. I also suggest you watch from start to the end and NOT skip any parts so you can maximize these tips: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bYHGl3qbf9aIj9E including asking yourself these very important questions to ask yourself before starting the process: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qmesZp5ratWheac but if you need the step-by-step process on what to do, including what to text or say during the process, either hire me as your coach, refer to my other vids or get the 2.0 version of my Ex Factor Guide at www.breakupbrad.com

[@ottagoldi9625]

getting avoidant ex back, while also can't demand anything from them....what's the point to get them back again?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Whoa. Perhaps "demand" is too strong of a word. Your ex doesn't owe you anything... and if you acted like he/she did while in a relationship with him/her then that may what have sent them running for the hills? Watch this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/g2XLaJykbsmnrqs

[@ottagoldi9625]

@@breakupbradbrowning so, asking for needs like affection, emotional bonding can't be called a demand?

[@IsmynameDotcom]

I did no contact for 30 days and found out She already monkey branched...

[@marguskiis7711]

She is just a young woman, common one b

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. It's time to take a look at the bigger picture here though. It doesn't really matter what your ex is doing. Chances are your ex is rebounding anyway but the point is you shouldn't be focused on that right now. That's all out of your control. Focus on yourself instead and show (NOT tell) your ex you accept her decision to break up. If you do, you'll accept that you're both single and therefore you'd stop overanalyzing every little stuff. All right? Here are the basics to getting an ex back: y2u.be/aeGNPBdpnsI and you can see that the 30-day "no contact" rule is an absolute must. I also suggest that you read my Ex Factor Guide since that’s much more detailed and so you'll know how to go about it, what to do after each phase (there are three phases in total and the "no contact" rule is only the first), including what to say, do or not do, etc. Good timing is essential! Check it out at www.breakupbrad.com/mbuy

[@franklujan8304]

@@marguskiis7711 she had this planned before you guys broke up…

[@ElearningDigest]

She had already been planning to monkey branch long before the breakup. Sorry to break it to you.

[@OlderWomenRock]

He Ghosted Me After We reunited for a second time After 6 weeks I asked Him to call Me and explain He did so reluctantly

[@breakupbradbrowning]

What was his excuse?

[@inspectionhumor]

Hey Brad, My name is Ron. I'm in an anxious - avoidant trap. I've been married to my avoidant wife for 29 years. She left and ghosted me 5 weeks ago today. Me being anxious, I spent the first 30 days freaking out and begging her to come home and promising everything under the sun. At 30 days, i stopped reaching out and have been trying to focus on myself. This is out of character for me because I always focused on her. I need help but I don't have extra money to subscribe to services and coaching. I really want to save my marriage! Thanks, Ron

[@SK-no2pp]

When you find yourself in a relationship with an avoidant partner and feel that the emotional labor is imbalanced, it's crucial to reflect on why you might be willing to accept such a dynamic for yourself. Relationships are not supposed to be work - they are a refuge from work. They do require effort, but it's effort that ultimately deepens connection and uplifts you both. Instead of finding ways to tolerate the intolerable, consider if you are repeating patterns from your early attachment experiences. Do you believe you deserve a balanced, reciprocal partnership? Identity any limiting beliefs that might be causing you to settle for less, such as "I have to work hard for love" or "I'm not worthy of a partner who meets my needs." Consider the hidden rewards of always being the one initiating emotional support - does that make you feel needed, or more in control? If someone didn't need you, why would they love you? Understand that you deserve a partnership where emotional labor is shared equally. Look for relationships where mutual respect and reciprocity are present. These are the foundations of a healthy and fulfilling partnership.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey man, I hear you. Is her ghosting you a regular occurrence though? How you handled her avoidant attachment style for the past 29 years should be the same way you handle this separation. Anyway you should be able to find lots of information on how to try to fix your marriage by doing all the right steps on my channel here, so check out my other videos as well. They're completely free and comes at no cost to you. Here's one which should hopefully help: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jqDWZI1qnZl7hKc Lots of people have found success with it, maybe you can, too. Good luck!

[@marguskiis7711]

Your wife just hit menopause and now all men are disgusting for her. You have to wait a year or two.

[@marguskiis7711]

She is not probably avoidant, she just has menopause. It turns women act very strange

[@Williampincushion1Hasley]

Based on this video, sounds like I'm the avoidant. I did a test and was labeled anxious lol

[@taylorbee4010]

FA

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Try to see the pattern you've shown when you're in a relationship with someone. Which signs are more consistent? Is it one from a more anxious style or is it the ones mentioned on this vid?

[@valentineamartey9717]

Or you can ditch them and find someone healthier who will love you the way you need to be loved.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Yes, like I always say, the decision is ultimately up to you. You know your situation and your ex best. Sometimes a relationship can be salvaged and worth the save but sometimes it isn't, especially if there's cheating or some other type of abuse involved.

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

Perfect marriages or relationships don't really exist; each one is special. What works for one person might not work for another. But I've come to realize that there's always a solution to every problem. Five years back, my wife and I were close to getting divorced because of issues in our marriage, but we found a way to make things right. It was hard, but we got through it.

[@oglaskubuot]

I genuinely want to find happiness too. I'm in a relationship, and even though we're apart at the moment, I can't imagine my life without her; my love for her is big. I really want her to return, and I'm fully committed to making it happen. We've tried different ways, like therapy, to mend things.

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

Saying farewell to someone you love dearly is never easy, but in my case, I had the assistance of a spiritual counselor who saved my marriage from falling apart. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.

[@oglaskubuot]

I'll immediately search for her online. I appreciate it. I'm hopeful that adopting this strategy will also bring about positive changes for me; I miss her deeply.

[@Newtonwilson-yw4kg]

I promise you will not regret it

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Good for you guys! Each situation is unique but there are core general tips that applies to common cases and is what my channel is focused on.

[@MrSamIAm39]

This man is good

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thank you so much! If I could get a "like" that would be awesome! Every subscription helps my channel grow, so please sub, too. Thanks man!

[@MrSamIAm39]

@@breakupbradbrowningdone! Wish me luck Mister, her stonewalling hurts like a mug 😅

[@paloma9209]

Hey, Brad! How are you? Thanks a lot for the content! My ex and I broke up about 2 weeks ago, cause he said he was feeling “suffocated” by me and I was feeling left out (guess I have an anxious attachment). He is going through a lot of changes in his life, financial difficulties and had a huge disappointment on his dream job, but I got tired of being mistreated (he used to pull away when he had a lot of problems in his personal life) and asked if he wanted to break up, to which he said yes (he didn’t even do the breaking up). After watching your video, a lot of things he used to say to me start to make sense now. I’m on the no contact period (2 weeks only), but what worries me is he’ll never reach out again. How do I know it’s safe to try to talk to him again (let’s say, 1 month, 45 days?) if he doesn’t really use social media? His mother told me he has agreed to start therapy again, but he has so much in his head right now that I don’t think our relationship will even be relevant. I just wish he let me be there to support him in these difficult times. Thanks again for the content, Brad, hope you do well on your KZbin career!

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey, all good. You're welcome! For now, be sure to prioritize the 30-day "no contact" rule. You can reach out to your ex after the 30 days straight of "no contact" period is over. In doing so, it's best to treat the situation with fresh eyes, so it's crucial to keep things fun and light and gently coax your ex into responding the same way. Here are the basics on what to do when it comes down to it. I also suggest you watch from start to the end and NOT skip any parts so you can maximize these tips: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bYHGl3qbf9aIj9E including asking yourself these very important questions to ask yourself before starting the process: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qmesZp5ratWheac but if you need the step-by-step process on what to do, including what to text or say during the process, either hire me as your coach, refer to my other vids or get the 2.0 version of my Ex Factor Guide at www.breakupbrad.com

[@michellehannity6383]

My avoidant started ghosting me after our 1-year anniversary. He was a week into pulling away when I reach back out to him. He was very receptive and started communicating very well with me. However unfortunately the next morning I found out he had been cheating on me. Once I confront him on this he started acting like I don't exist. It's been almost 2 months.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. He could very well be an avoidant... or simply confused about what he wants/not that into you but a week is way too soon to be dealing with an ex. However, if your ex has the "Grass is Greener" Syndrome, realize and accept that this is outside your control and really the best you can do is becoming the best version of yourself and vibrate higher, which means NOT taking less than what you deserve and not settling to just becoming an option, especially if this used to be a stable relationship between you two. He's likely taken you for granted, so you don't really need that in your life. Use the law of attraction. You deserve love and worth of love, so you can only attract love. If he goes away from it, then you repelled him and will only attract him back if he vibrates as high as you. Otherwise, be open to new people who may be on your level. Be strong!

[@robertdeskoski9783]

...what in the hell?

[@sinisterblister9981]

Hey man, I wish you would elaborate more on that last point. I believe that this is the most crucial one to get back together with an avoidant and understand. I am just going through it right now and patience little hesitant way is key but there should be very sensitive communication. And I do not agree that a 30 day or whatsoever no contact is neccesary because there needs to be developed a different kind of momentum and communication and of course that will never happen over night. I thin a lot of people do no contact and ignore there ex partner as everybody says that you should not react to breadcrumbing etc.... that not always the case.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

You'll tend to react to every bread crumb your ex throws your way if you're placing too much importance to your ex before your ex truly deserves it. Always strive for balance so save a life of your own and be sure to NOT make getting back with an ex your sole priority. Okay? Play your cards right, of course, but be sure you have other avenues to spend your time on that equally makes you happy. Check out my Ex Factor Guide 2.0 to help you in the process, at www.breakupbrad.com Good luck!

[@corywoodard7239]

She has broken up with me twice now, she has lasted 2 months without ever reaching out to me. I was crushed and she knew this. But I see no reason for her to reach out to me. 2 months, 1 conversation. She does not reply to me. I haven’t messaged for 2 weeks now. (15 days) 2 year long relationship. My avoidant ex and me the anxious one.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

An on-and-off relationship often signifies underlying issues which have been left unaddressed for quite some time. Read this first to know what to expect when you have this kind of dynamic in your relationship: bit.ly/1HjcagC But if you're interested in making this your last breakup, sign up for my coaching program at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching especially if there's an available spot!

[@SK-no2pp]

When you find yourself in a relationship with an avoidant partner and feel that the emotional labor is imbalanced, it's crucial to reflect on why you might be willing to accept such a dynamic for yourself. Relationships are not supposed to be work - they are a refuge from work. They do require effort, but it's effort that ultimately deepens connection and uplifts you both. Instead of finding ways to tolerate the intolerable, consider if you are repeating patterns from your early attachment experiences. Do you believe you deserve a balanced, reciprocal partnership? Identity any limiting beliefs that might be causing you to settle for less, such as "I have to work hard for love" or "I'm not worthy of a partner who meets my needs." Consider the hidden rewards of always being the one initiating emotional support - does that make you feel needed, or more in control? If someone didn't need you, why would they love you? Understand that you deserve a partnership where emotional labor is shared equally. Look for relationships where mutual respect and reciprocity are present. These are the foundations of a healthy and fulfilling partnership.

[@chrisshanks3130]

Its 3 weeks. I ended it because it was causing so much physical pain and problems for her .Yesterday I bought her a bootcamp coarse on line and sent it to her email to recondition her mind from her childhood trauma. I don't think she is coming back. We had a 4 year relationship. I'm just learning about this with a dismissive avoidant. I do want her back.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hopefully she gains something out of the course and put it to practice. You do need to give her space though. Focus on your own life because avoidants do tend to come back in weird ways to feel out the situation. So once you start to see some progress with your ex, then don’t go at it alone, especially if you're in doubt or don't know what to do next. Sign up for my coaching program so I can help assess your situation clearly, look at all the other factors at play and see things you might have missed, then guide you accordingly on a regular, ongoing basis at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@johnkaiser6710]

How does this apply to disorganized attachment? I did roughly a month of no contact, got blocked while working to reconnect. So at her blockage I'm back to no contact.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! If she's truly an avoidant, this will happen most of the time at some point: kzbin.info/www/bejne/api3iXlqZ7uhntk

[@marguskiis7711]

For DAs one month is too little, 45 days is minimum.

[@aroncsik6660]

My anxious attachment got triggered so I was jealous and She broke up with me.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That tends to be the case with avoidant-anxious relationships, so if anything, take solace in the fact that you're definitely not alone. Anyway this vid is for you, so please watch from start to end: kzbin.info/www/bejne/api3iXlqZ7uhntk

[@gabe9646]

It stings that Im the only ex that she's wanted to completely cut ties with, even though I was never toxic. I was a good fucking man to her. Even though she said she loved me like crazy, and I've given her plenty of space/freedom, doing everything psych gurus suggest with avoidants, she still doesnt want anything to do with me. The last time we spent together was probably the most vulnerable I've ever seen her.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. You may wanna watch this, too: kzbin.info/www/bejne/oanKqKZ4mdmabqc

[@tabbielegend265]

Make more videous on avoidant

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Stay tuned! :-)

[@LoLFeVerry]

Brad, its been more than 4-5 month of proper NC , she is apart of my circle of friends and we are sure to meet however she acts like im non existent but she does aknowledge my voice / speech. Im gonna man up and meet her in 3 days face 2 face to invite her out for a talk. Im planning to own my mistake and take accountability. You think this is the right idea?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

This really depends. Have you done something huge that led to the downfall of the relationship? If you haven't, then don't apologize because that move, although laid with good intentions, will only appear as desperate to your ex. Starting a serious conversation about the past is ALSO a big mistake and may lead to a cringe moment for you both. However, you can reach out to your ex after the 30 days straight of "no contact" period is over. In doing so, it's best to treat the situation with fresh eyes, so it's crucial to keep things fun and light and gently coax your ex into responding the same way. Here are the basics on what to do when it comes down to it. I also suggest you watch from start to the end and NOT skip any parts so you can maximize these tips: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bYHGl3qbf9aIj9E including asking yourself these very important questions to ask yourself before starting the process: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qmesZp5ratWheac but if you need the step-by-step process on what to do, including what to text or say during the process, either hire me as your coach, refer to my other vids or get the 2.0 version of my Ex Factor Guide at www.breakupbrad.com

[@amys5484]

That sounds great but what about the avoidant that monkey branch?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

The issue lies with them and not you and your ex pretty much made their choice. They'll likely repeat the same patterns. What you can do is focus on yourself and consider moving on, yeah?

[@jamesspeed5744]

Hey Brad that’s a really good video. I feel my avoidant ex is trying to bait me on social media to break no contact, posting pictures with my friends, posting pictures of where we was on holiday and even one of the pictures me in it a little bit? How would you describe that behaviour?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Maybe she's trying to test you. Try to see if you notice any of the signs mentioned here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/hp7CYmN4gLumnKM

[@alnann1132]

Hi brad because of your videos i got to learn so much about my ex she was an anxious person but in recent months she became an avoidant and it was hurting me because she was ghosting me and never giving me the honest answer that i wanted from her. Even though we broke up mutually i made our friendship a bit toxic because i did some mistakes after the breakup that made her kind of hate me and now she still ghosts me specifically and i don't know how i can get her or move on from her.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi. Glad I've helped somehow. If you haven't checked out my other vids, being friends with an ex right after the breakup is never a good idea for you. Watch this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/pqfClJ2wnbt-d7s Give yourself time because really the decision is yours. This may help you process or deal with the breakup efficiently: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bavTaIZ8l8p2iLc but if you find yourself needing more guidance on how to lead a more fruitful life without your ex, get my Beat the Breakup Guide at www.beatmybreakup.com or get my Ex Factor Guide if you want to try to get your ex back in the best possible way, at www.breakupbrad.com Take care!

[@ingeclaeys3761]

Honestly, don't try to get your DA ex back until both of you are working towards becoming secure, otherwise all the effort will be one sided. You'll end walking on egg shells (again) and will walk away cause your needs aren't begin met (despite communicating them clearly) and you are staying true to yourself.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That sounds like a plan! That's possible but it's also a long arduous process that takes dedication and patient on both sides.

[@shakeybal]

I really appreciate your wisdom. My concern about this guidance though is balancing between hope and brutal honesty. This video gives me hope that my avoidant ex may come back if I follow the steps. But in reality this may not be the case and I am holding onto something that isnt there anymore. How do I find this balance between being hopeful and optimistic versus being honest and real with myself?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

A healthy sense of optimism is needed indeed along with viewing the situation for what it is so as not to look at it with rose coloured glasses. This means you ought to have a balanced approach but cutting off contact will naturally help you with that, so try to stick to that rule for 30 days. One way to go about this is to not get too caught up with getting your ex back so you will allow for stuff to play naturally while playing your cards right , which is what my videos and/or my Ex Factor Guide 2.0 is for. If you still can't help it, go ahead and sign up for my coaching program so I can guide you accordingly at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching but really try to have that sense of independence without your ex first. You need to be able to rely on yourself before you're in a position to get an ex back. Apply the tips here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/aoLIXmd3YqijjLs but this is the overview of what needs to happen, it helps to review it: y2u.be/7JtmVbDkblw Good luck!

[@ejag7375]

I was stonewalled by my ex right after our first trip away as a ‘family’ with her 5 year old daughter. She cited not being heard as I wouldn’t let her pay for groceries of all things. It’s been 2 months NC and she’s blocked me. I absolutely need help understanding this! My thoughts were she was definitely wanting to evolve things as she wouldn’t have agreed to take the trip away but because of the stonewalling, I am confused whether she is just not that into me or an avoidant who just couldn’t take responsibility for her behavior.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi there! Although I'd like to offer a tip or two, there's simply too many elements to your situation that makes this too complex for me to properly respond here… please consider signing up for coaching if you want to talk at length about your situation: www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@lmfisher650]

What if they are claiming they 'lost feelings' for you over recent time (but won't tell you why and what you've done to cause it) and want to be single (which i believe)... they also want to remain friends... does he still love me? I could still feel the love literally a day before he dumped me... he was actually making plans the day before he dumped me but he also was withdrawing for a few weeks before hand. He is also in a depression state and currently upping his medications. Is this depression and his FA behaviours all rolling into one?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Some medications are known to cause mood changes, so it could play a role. If your ex has a mental disorder like depression, bipolar disorder, IED, NPD, or the like, the most loving thing you can do is to give each other space while he/she gets help. Encourage your ex to seek treatment because this is something only a therapist specializing on this can handle, even this is outside of my scope. But I can help you how to handle things on YOUR end as you go through this difficult ordeal. I know it can be incredibly tough knowing you’ve given it your best shot, yet your partner still fails to appreciate it or is breaking up despite it being a good relationship. Anyway it's a bad idea to be friends with an ex especially knowing they have a mental health condition. In the end, they will drain you and leave you with lots of scars that would take years of therapy. Consider signing up for my coaching program so I can help assess your situation clearly, look at all the other factors at play and see things you might have missed, then guide you accordingly on a regular, ongoing basis at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@lmfisher650]

@@breakupbradbrowning after looking into it further, he is definitely a fearful avoidant and has displayed all the classic signs. He has adhd and depression. He is currently updosing his medications. I've looked into the role the biochemistry plays and I can't help but be empathetic. I don't think he means what he says about 'losing feelings for me', I think he feels fear and engulfment at the moment and needs to retreat. I'm in no contact and everything has been amicable and he wants to remain friends but I can't be friend zoned. It's not over, I love him and I can feel he loves me too. I'm trying not to chase him and hope he comes back on his own. He has a history of going back to exes. I know I was special enough. He felt hurt and anxious about dumping me simply because he couldn't give me what I wanted (marriage). I want to work it out and help each other heal our attachment wounds.

[@AshleyKapperude]

What does it mean if he keeps telling me we are done and for me to move on. After I cheated on him. I really want him back what can I do to get him back😢😢😢

[@murshid4765]

We have been together for 6 months,always behaving hot and cold.Sometimes i feel she is into me,sometimes i felt she doesn't know me at all.She has said everyone at my office that there is nothing between us but that is not true.Finally some of my collegues miscommunicated something to her not a that big thing but she made it like a mountain and brokeup with me infront of everyone and since then i am devastated😢And from past month I am in no contact and she is happy enjoying with the toxic friends

[@breakupbradbrowning]

There may be other issues present which you both are too close to see, regardless of the attachment style. Depending on what really cut the relationship short, it may be time to consider moving on from this. But don't rush. Always take the time to give each other space first, all right? Do a minimum of 3 weeks of "no contact" and see if you still want your ex and if your ex is receptive to contact AFTER that period. Watch this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/sKiTdJurjah4o9k

[@blastuka]

Hey Brad love the content! My situation is unique I used the no contact that you instructed then we started hanging out again and it was amazing but recently she has news that her father might die from a stroke (that was 3 weeks ago) and ive been reaching out seeing if she wants to talk or go for walks but it seems like she is super depressed and not wanting to do anything. It seems I can't do anything to help. Should I go back to no contact again? (Btw she is an avoidant)

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Don't go back to not contacting her but be empathetic and patient about what she's going through because chances are it has nothing to do with you. Since she's already your ex and not really your girlfriend anymore, tell her you're there for her but don't push it. Okay? Definitely don't push for a relationship. Be a source of comfort for her rather than a source of stress. If you aren't sure this will work and/or need further help on this, sign up for my coaching program so I can guide you on a regular basis, at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@blastuka]

@@breakupbradbrowning Thank you Brad 🙏

[@mmbovilladardh]

It’s been a month since my avoidant man and I fell out bc I wouldn’t sleep with him. (This is due to his treatment of me in the lead up to me being in the same country as him.) Despite all that I did for him and giving him space etc he went cold and discarded me. I tried to talk to him but not in a desperate or persistent way. I tried once and he didn’t want to so I said fine by me peace out. It’s been a month. I haven’t begged or reached out. I wonder if he’s gonna try again or not.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

If he's gonna try again but you still couldn't give him what he wants, then I'm afraid it'll just be an unhealthy loop between you two. I'm encouraging you to honour your feelings but if you don't want to naturally want to sleep with him, then you two may be better off with other people...especially if he has treated you badly before. You deserve better!

[@Gg123-h1n]

I wasn't perfect. What if he blindsided me at my worst? Said he didnt see a future and lost romantic feelings. Can he still return? He was the healthiest relationship I've been in. So loving all of it.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Blindsided how? Hopefully not via cheating? I say generally it's still fair game unless you see most if not all the signs that your ex is over you. Here's the vid: kzbin.info/www/bejne/kKqtg6OerKmWl5Y and especially if those signs prevail over a prolonged period of time. If you're asking about your chances, I really wish I could give you a direct yes or no. However, as it is, each situation is unique, so I suggest you take the free quiz as it hits on the critical elements that will determine your chances depending on your answers. In other words, my quiz can give you a more accurate answer than I can since as you may have noticed, there are various factors at play here which needs to be looked at as well as your own actions after the breakup. Here's the link: www.breakupbrad.com/quiz Best of luck!

[@QueenSalda]

How does this work when the avoidant blocked you?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

This isn't really a concerning issue, at least initially, unless you've done something really epic to mess things up or really hurt your ex, there's no reason to worry as much, really, because it could be due to the reasons I've stated on this vid: y2u.be/s52sRweJlm8 So give it time. If you stay blocked after months though, then that’s another story, especially if you have no other means of communication or have no mutual friends. More about that on here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/a4a3amV_d5qondU Anyway social media should be the least of your concerns. Focus on all three phases and your ex may naturally unblock you, in time, as you learn to rebuild that attraction and re-attract this ex back to your life.. Here are the basics of all three phases to getting an ex back: kzbin.info/www/bejne/l5aqf4N4mdWhqas and social-media wise, here (but then again, don't let it become your sole focus) : kzbin.info/www/bejne/emKqoYVrgqajh80 Good luck!

[@Danny89988]

Is there a difference between fearful avoidant and dismissive avoidant Brad?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Yes. One of the four styles I've mentioned which is disorganized attachment style is also known as fearful-avoidant attachment style. The "avoidant" term I've used refers to dismissive avoidant versus anxious style.

[@Danny89988]

@@breakupbradbrowning can you do a video with the difference please?

[@CuriousMind1000]

after 5 years together she has left me for someone else lol don't think NC or any shit like that will work I don't even want her back anymore but I still love her and there is some pointless hope inside me. I dont know..

[@Williampincushion1Hasley]

I'm in the same boat

[@marguskiis7711]

She probably isn't a DA, she is just a young woman hooking around.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear you're going through this. Cheating oftentimes does put the nail on the proverbial coffin. I understand what you're going through. You know, moving on is a tricky process and the emotions come in waves. This video is for you: kzbin.info/www/bejne/ZmLap3-Jlrhslas And if you're still having a hard time, this should help you understand why in order to understand what you're going through: kzbin.info/www/bejne/aHTEnIKFiNx8n7s & understand where your ex is at during the breakup process: y2u.be/dqnqGWOk9NA or get my latest e-book Beat the Breakup guide as that will help you and your mindset to evolve from the breakup and therefore become the best version of yourself. Check it out at www.beatmybreakup.com but if you want to take a shot at trying to fix your relationship, get my Ex Factor Guide at www.breakupbrad.com There is no right or wrong way to feel about certain things, but it's best you take time to decide what's best for you. Take care!

[@Tjmacyb]

What does it mean if your avoidant ex says, “we can move past everything and be friends now” just after that first catch up? Is this their way of just putting up that boundary and it gives an opportunity to just take things slow?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

It very well could be! I'd say you two are friends or more appropriately, talking terms for now, but don't let that derail you, assuming you've done the first phase (30-day "no contact" rule) correctly and basically had set the stage for this second part. Since you've only recently reconnected, then don't expect your ex to warm up easily. If you've already reconnected for a while though and your ex is pushing you deeper into that friendship hole, then that's a different story. Getting an ex back is a process. Whatever you do, make sure you don’t resort to doing the things here: y2u.be/jikW4YYC9yo

[@chowar001]

My ex came here in 2012 she is from overseas where her aunt was raising her & parents abandoned her & left her with her aunt. Her dad is a US citizen & applied for her visa to come here. We dated for 6 mons got into a small disagreement about some travel arrangements. She said hurtful things that I disregarded due to the sake of keeping the relationship. We never really reconcile two weeks after that she ended the relationship. I have made multiple attempts to reach out over a month. Went no contact for six months reached out and still got absolutely nothing.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

The lack of response is never a good sign. What sort of messages have you been sending though? Have you tried to apply my texting samples on the channel? It's a different story if you've been trying for so long with all the right moves and still no progress. It just depends how this plays out really. Focus on the second and third phases instead. It helps to learn the basics here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/l5aqf4N4mdWhqas and/or better yet, read my guide to guide you every step of the way, at www.breakupbrad.com Good luck!

[@connorn6378]

i was drunk got petty with her due to jealousy and she blocked me an hour after she left the discord chat

[@breakupbradbrowning]

This is a very expected reaction from an ex. Here are the most common scenarios and my thoughts about it, including what to do: y2u.be/s52sRweJlm8 and don't forget to take the quiz if you still want to know what your chances are and/or still have questions on what to do after, at www.breakupbrad.com/quiz Good luck!

[@confidenceblesson]

Thank you brad..this was helpful 😊

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey, you're welcome! Please like and subscribe if you haven't already, I'd really appreciate it. Thanks! :-)

[@RoyKuhlmann-bf3th]

She does still love me and tries but my anxiety ruins it every time

[@breakupbradbrowning]

It's never a bad idea to ask for help, you know. The good news though is awareness is key and looks like you're halfway through this battle. Never give up! :-)

[@franceslynn5537]

We were together on and off for 10 years and he ghosted me

[@breakupbradbrowning]

With on-and-off relationships, oftentimes this is a sign of underlying issues which have been left unaddressed for quite some time. It may be time to put things into perspective while it's still early because in 14 years spent as a relationship online coach alone, I find that a breakup is often NOT just one person's fault, so look at the roles that you've BOTH played that led to the breakup and if the issues have a chance to get resolved, and how to go about it. In most cases, the problems that led to the breakup can be resolved, but in some cases, it can't. So take time to evaluate, okay? However, I have to warn you not to ask the reasons from your ex. This is what I've discussed here along with other stuff that might help you, so this is a must-watch: kzbin.info/www/bejne/sKKkdpxvhcd4d6M But if you're interested in making this your last breakup, sign up for my coaching program at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching especially if there's an available spot. Good luck!

[@jeremygarcia1526]

my ex cheated on me with her ex husband and now is posting him on her social media ive been so clingy we have 2 little kids togethor 3 months and 5 years old what do i do to get her back will no contact work ? shes telling me to leave her alone but what will that do

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Really sorry to hear that, man. But at this point, it is best to leave her be at least for a few weeks. If you're determined to try to work things out, let me just set expectations that it's a tough battle for sure with kid/s involved and/or usually other responsibilities still tied to your ex, but it's best you do limited contact or what I call the dynamic "no contact" rule instead of the full on silence associated with the no contact rule. Prepare for things to be tough but if you play your cards right and depending on the extent of damage done, it can actually still be salvaged. Try to prevent things from getting even more awkward than it has to be by applying the tips here as much as possible, in addition to my newer vids I've posted: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fYXNdnR9f7yHq6M AND kzbin.info/www/bejne/mnW9o6GEnZ1_hck or for a comprehensive guide on how to go about things, consider getting my Ex Factor Guide 2.0 at www.breakupbrad.com

[@yournewconfidence]

You literally quoted his reasons why he broke up with me. I’ve tried to contact him and it puts his defences up. But now I’ve been blocked on everything and he wants no contact. It’s been four months. So how long do I wait?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Staying blocked for months isn't a very promising sign. If your ex has ghosted you or blocked you everywhere where contact is impossible and you can't text/call/email even though a lot of time has already passed (i.e: more than 6 months), then I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it's likely over for good. It's one of the things I've discussed here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fIGbiqB7p6qCjZo

[@DSpiesRN]

Yes, my ex ghosted me. He did it pretty often but for no longer than maybe 4 to 6 weeks. however now it has been four a half months. but says that he would like us to get back together in the future

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! When did you two broke up and do you trust him? Please review the tips here first: kzbin.info/www/bejne/ZnLImYOOgcaUfck

[@OlderWomenRock]

Questions , Do Secure people Ghost ? Do Secure People break up and come back and leave again ? Are Secure People uncertain ?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Yes to all questions but they are less likely to do that in comparison to other attachment styles. It also depends on the relationship you're in because as mentioned, your (as well as your ex's) attachment style is shaped by that interaction.

[@verarobinson6759]

No run no future with that kind of men

[@breakupbradbrowning]

They want and deserve love, too, just like everybody else. They just need someone capable of being patient and willing to understand them and how they operate in relationships.

[@soul-etude]

I am a secure watching this😊

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Cool! Thanks for dropping by. :-)

[@nachtorchis]

Best advice is to stay away

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Two avoidants can't work, so yes, consider moving on from this.

[@RedDeath2329]

You've given me a lot to think about thanks for the advice

[@breakupbradbrowning]

You're welcome! Thanks for dropping by.

[@secura8219]

What if your avoidant ex went back to his previous ex after being broken up after 6 months? We been in contact after break up up until 3 weeks ago. I’m In no contact now

[@breakupbradbrowning]

I really hate to burst your bubble here but let him finish whatever unfinished business he has with this ex. Sorry, but there's not much you can do at this point, especially if your relationship only lasted a short while and more so if he’s seemingly (subconsciously or not) used you as a rebound, for your ex to jump back too quickly with her. Good luck and I hope you find the right guy for you soon!

[@breakupbradbrowning]

I really hate to burst your bubble here but let him finish whatever unfinished business he has with this ex. Sorry, but there's not much you can do at this point, especially if your relationship only lasted a short while and more so if he’s seemingly (subconsciously or not) used you as a rebound, for your ex to jump back too quickly with her. Good luck and I hope you find the right guy for you soon!

[@betht8872]

my avoidant ex left me almost 2 months ago. i am still devastated. he has made no attempt to contact me. How do i know when it is over forever?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! You'll likely see the signs here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/kKqtg6OerKmWl5Y If that's the case, then this may help you process or deal with the breakup efficiently: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bavTaIZ8l8p2iLc but if you find yourself needing more guidance on how to lead a more fruitful life without your ex, get my Beat the Breakup Guide at www.beatmybreakup.com or get my Ex Factor Guide if you want to try to get your ex back in the best possible way, at www.breakupbrad.com Take care!

[@JosephEbiagbor]

Hello I was scrolling through the app and I got a psychic divination about you“it appears you are still in love with someone whose access is limited, whom you think doesn’t love you back,am I correct

[@ShopgirlNY182]

The question is why would you want an avoidant ex back?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Everyone has their reasons, man. But hey, everyone deserves love too. But yes, avoidant attachers require more patience, love and understanding than most and it's certainly not everyone's cup of tea!

[@ShopgirlNY182]

@@breakupbradbrowning Of course everyone deserves love but personally I wouldn’t recommend taking an ex back because most likely they’ll repeat the cycle of fears being triggered, won’t communicate their feelings and then discard you once again. And I’m sure it’ll be even more painful the second go round. Hard pass on that.

[@abrantadeo745]

Yup! My ex ghosted me!

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that.

[@ivanpereirapereira2890]

Hello, now i am lost, do you or you dont have to apply a cero contact to an ex that dissmis you?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Employ the 30-day "no contact" rule right away. Chasing an ex would be the worst move right now, so give it time.

[@ivanpereirapereira2890]

@@breakupbradbrowning i am in the 4 week apllying not contact, so i should have to contact get againg, is not supoosed that you have to wait she brakes the not contact and reach to me, i think she she an avoidant ex

[@kellz728]

If the dumper continues to say no I’m not coming back but keeps our dog whenever I need them to, says he loves me and is in love with me and misses me but needs time and says we are no longer together do you think they’ll come back?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

He made a lot of contradictions in one sentence. If the breakup is fresh, that is common, expected even, from an ex. This is why it's important to really give it time and space first. Here are some tips to remember if you're trying to win an ex back and how important Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is: kzbin.info/www/bejne/iYWvm6yYrs6UeLM and/or better yet, check out my Ex Factor Guide 2.0 as it helps you navigate the breakup more effectively. It also includes bonus texting materials to send your ex when the time comes, at www.breakupbrad.com/fbuy Take care!

[@boogerbearstudios2844]

What if they start calling you every couple days once you apply no contact and then they just stop? Does that mean they’re done testing the waters for good and about to move on?

[@markhook9449]

Why didn’t you answer?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Not really, especially if the breakup is still fresh. If you really wanna know, then it helps to find out which stage your ex is at during the breakup process, here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mqLRonqNhNBshKM

[@boogerbearstudios2844]

@@markhook9449 I answered every time

[@boogerbearstudios2844]

@@breakupbradbrowning thanks for the reply, the only thing I’m stuck on is wether I should remove her from my Spotify or not. I feel like if I don’t then she’ll know I’m still interested and won’t feel any need to come back

[@Lori-l6g]

My ex ghosted me after a fight.. 5 years relationship. Its been 6 months..

[@breakupbradbrowning]

What was the the fight about that led to all that? Has your relationship been rocky prior to this? Sorry, this is a bit too complex for me to properly respond here… please consider signing up for coaching if you want to talk at length about your situation: www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@Reelbassin]

My soon to be ex wife is way too stubborn to take any accountability and admit she wants to come back. She’s broken up our family with 2 young children. Shes port partem depressed, always been an avoidant. I don’t feel she will come around and don’t have a clue what to do.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. It's tougher when kids are involved. But what were the issues in your relationship? Here's a quick overview of what needs to happen: kzbin.info/www/bejne/e3Smi6CVotatgck Have you checked out my Ex Factor Guide 2.0 yet? It may help a ton, along with bonus texting materials to send your ex. Before anything else though, take the free quiz on my website to gauge your chances of getting your ex back, at www.breakupbrad.com/quiz

[@BobbySykes-s3b]

Divorced with intent to date exclusive. Ghosted ,texting to painful. No contact 2 weeks thus

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry, are you dating a divorcee or are you referring to your own situation where you divorced and tried to date exclusively again? Although I'd like to offer a tip or two, there's simply too many elements to your situation that makes this too complex for me to properly respond here… please consider signing up for coaching if you want to talk at length about your situation: www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@JaimeHarrison-bp6cf]

Hay brad my ex boyfriend and I long distances I had no contact with him for awhile but he not texting me all the time what do I do

[@breakupbradbrowning]

If he's an ex, he's not going to be texting you all the time. Take time to build positive rapport first. Also what sort of messages have you been sending him? The right messages should leave him looking forward to more conversations with you. Employ the tips from my Ex Factor Guide to help you out, at www.breakupbrad.com/fbuy Best of luck!

[@badpani]

Brad my ex unfollowed me from everywhere but if i text him he will answer that quickly we don't have connection anymore it's just my bestfriend who is his bestfriend's girlfriend:))it's a little complicated I don't know what to do they always hangout but I can't =(it really hurts

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Focus on things you can control instead of putting attention to what's lacking... and you'll be happier. You can hang out with your bestfriend without your ex. Here are some tips to remember if you're trying to win an ex back and how important Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is: kzbin.info/www/bejne/iYWvm6yYrs6UeLM

[@badpani]

@@breakupbradbrowning thanks brad I try my best 🥲

[@anthonymagner4896]

Can you please make a video on how to get an ex back that has disabilities? Disabilities such as Autism, Learning Disabilities, Schizophrenia, Anxiety and Depression?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

I may get into that. For now, since your situation may be unique, I think you can benefit by working with me one-on-one so I get to learn more about the situation and therefore be more equipped to help you out, at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@anthonymagner4896]

@@breakupbradbrowning I’m on a fixed income right now until I get a job and I can’t really afford that much right now. Is there any kind of deal you can offer me?

[@fatimasalie3911]

Yeah they kp pushing me away😢

[@breakupbradbrowning]

It's tough when that happens, I know. How many cycles of push-and-pull have you been having with this ex?

[@TamiSharp-u1v]

What about 3 times

[@breakupbradbrowning]

An on-and-off relationship often signifies underlying issues which have been left unaddressed for quite some time. Read this first to know what to expect when you have this kind of dynamic in your relationship: bit.ly/1HjcagC But if you're interested in making this your last breakup, sign up for my coaching program at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching especially if there's an available spot!

[@TamiSharp-u1v]

@@breakupbradbrowning Thank you

[@cobalto65]

So im doing trying no contact, but cant fully do it due to circumstances and she has reached out. So not sure what to do next.

[@philipramsden4975]

If she reached out, you should respond

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! Please watch this vid to get your answer: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mnW9o6GEnZ1_hck

[@JosephEbiagbor]

Hello I was scrolling through the app and I got a psychic divination about you“it appears you are still in love with someone whose access is limited, whom you think doesn’t love you back,am I correct

[@kyramoan6739]

My ex has ghosted me after a 61/2 year relationship.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. Does he have an avoidant attachment style? If so, has this happened before? Sorry, this is a bit too complex for me to properly respond here… please consider signing up for coaching if you want to talk at length about your situation: www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@kyramoan6739]

@@breakupbradbrowning yes I believe that he's a dismissive avoidant but he hasn't been diagnosed. That's just what I've learned for doing years of research on mental health, personality disorders & attachment styles. Yes he has done this before. We got a long fantastic for over 2 years and then it was like overnight he started COMPLETELY sabotaging us & his life in Every aspect. Friends, family, career, his children etc...he got so bad he was into drugs & ended up in prison for 6-8 months. Now he's clean & working & seeing his children again & I couldn't be prouder of him. We spent 1 Amazing day together & we were going to work on things I was ecstatic!! Then 2 days later he posted on Facebook that he was in a relationship & it wasn't with me. I honestly Don't understand anything anymore.

[@robync2728]

My previous relationship did show me the shift of styles. At the beginning we were both secure, then someone tried to split us up. Because of this I became really anxious and he became avoidant. Things started spiralling, he was avoiding me and then I presented him with the option of a breakup and he didn't take it. We tried to keep on friendly terms, but I found that bit by bit I became the one who was very avoidant... more so than he ever really was. I am definitely confused and I don't know what to make of it. I wanted to watch this in hopes that I can find a solution on what to do with this

[@breakupbradbrowning]

This may all boil down to communication. Two secure people can indeed try to have an open, honest communication with each other and work as team instead of treating or looking at each other as a threat. If you need help on this, hire me as your coach so I can take a closer look at your situation to see what's really going on and how to best proceed forward, at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@JosephEbiagbor]

Hello I was scrolling through the app and I got a psychic divination about you“it appears you are still in love with someone whose access is limited, whom you think doesn’t love you back,am I correct

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thanks for reaching out. A lot depends on what really happened between you two. Chances are you two need space right now if things became so confusing. Sorry, this is a bit too complex for me to properly respond here… please consider signing up for coaching if you want to talk at length about your situation where we could get to the bottom of the issue/s: www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

[@altonscott8519]

I'm sorry I never wanted a Xbox because from the show me the side I cannot live with why would I want a text back

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey man, if your ex has an avoidant attachment style, it's completely your choice whether to tolerate it or try to fix the relationship. You know your ex and how your relationship was better than I do or anyone on here so that's your prerogative.

[@tonyalee5257]

Ghosted again for the ? Time.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey thanks for dropping by!

[@SK-no2pp]

What you permit you promote

[@Manchestertreblewinners]

21 days no contact heard nothing from her blocked everywhere 😢

[@MadMaxMan2008]

21 days?? I’m at 90 days!!! Still no bread crumbs. She is a tough cookie. She may be gone forever. I am also blocked on everything. My advice is just hold on man!!! Don’t break no contract. It’s going to be okay.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Sorry to hear that. Here are the most common reasons for being blocked and my thoughts about it, including what to do: y2u.be/s52sRweJlm8 and don't forget to take the quiz if you still want to know what your chances are and/or still have questions on what to do after, at www.breakupbrad.com/quiz

[@JosephEbiagbor]

Hello I was scrolling through the app and I got a psychic divination about you“it appears you are still in love with someone whose access is limited, whom you think doesn’t love you back,am I correct?

[@MadMaxMan2008]

@@JosephEbiagbor I have been in love with her for twenty years. I finally got her and then nine months later gone blocked on everything. I messed up??? I didn’t even know what a dismissive, avoiding even was. Unfortunately, I know now. I had no idea I was walking into a Mindfield. It’s been 110 days I do I try to contact her or leave her be

[@Manchestertreblewinners]

@@JosephEbiagbor That is correct it’s 43 days no contact she has just started recently following her her art account from main profile on instagram which I don’t know why I’m blocked everywhere but the art account she left me unblocked

[@Freudster21]

What if she got triggered, discarded, then rebounded or monkey branched and is in honey moon phase with the new guy? It’s been 2.5 months. I’m thinking she might be gone lol

[@Freudster21]

@@michaella5799 Oh I’m well aware, it is just put her into FWB category. She is recreational use only now. I’ve had exes come back in the past for some fun, but they don’t always come back. If they do I noticed it’s anywhere from 3 months to years later. I think I’m pretty much done with actual committed relationships, I took like 3 years to date and just be single after my last big monkey branching, then this one was the last try, I thought she was different than the rest, but naw she waisted 1.5 years of my life, and here I am single while she lined up the replacement while I thought we were committed and together still lol. No communication of any urgent issues she just cut and run.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Ooof! Wait for a better time before interacting with your ex, however, don't wait around doing nothing. Take a leap of faith on a new path as well because you never know where life can take you, which may be better without your ex. Use this time to heal and prioritize yourself. But if it's been more than a year or so, make sure to check the signs if your ex has moved on, here: y2u.be/YVViZmY2x0I and this should help guide you on what to do for the time being: y2u.be/hlikXIfMYN8 However, make it a point to be really productive with your time being apart. Follow the tips here to help guide you further: y2u.be/gUB

[@Freudster21]

@@breakupbradbrowning Thanks. I went no contact for 2 months and I found a reason to text her; and we had some playful banter back and forth. I asked her out to meet up, and she said yea maybe next week. But she wouldn’t commit to a specific date and time and said she would have to wait to see if her schedule freed up. I followed up the next week with another good reason to text her and we had some good inside jokes and she was doing laughing emojis and lol’s. Then I asked if her schedule freed up but then she left me on delivered. I sent one more text (another good reason to text her) but she ignored that one too. That was 2 nights ago, and she still hasn’t responded. So there’s some mixed signals, she was open to meeting but pulled back, and then ignored me. So I gave it a shot, and have went back into no contact. Not sure what to do from here without seeming needy. Probably will wait a month unless she reaches out. I don’t know for sure if she is still with the rebound or not.

[@randineff9348]

Don’t worry.. it won’t work. She’ll be coming back. Work on yourself and be strong and don’t reach out.

[@waznyk88]

What if during no concact (less then a month) thEY keep reaching out every couple of days. To ask hows work etc. And try to carry a casual conversation?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That's what I call the "check-in" text and believe it or not, your ex is somewhat expected to send one or more of these sooner or later and I've got just the vid for that. Discussed that in one of the vids, including how to handle that kind of message and when and/or how to reply, including what not to text, (so watch to the end of the vid) here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qpbZY2Cip6-kbdE

[@PoshByDefault]

why tf is KZbin in italics today?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

I have yet to see that!

[@NederlandseGeschiedenis]

I have been waiting for her for 39 years now, in that time she has already had 3 new relationships, I have been left with a heartache about it, now after 39 years it still hurts, I have never been able to find love in a new relationship, I no longer met anyone who wanted me and I am now almost 64 years old and still alone

[@breakupbradbrowning]

That's sad. Finding love does require an effort on your end...especially seeing how you're the only one feeling this way for your ex. Considering how it's been decades, it's not really doing you any justice for you to hang on to someone who proves they don't need you in their life or even thinking about you.

[@NederlandseGeschiedenis]

@@breakupbradbrowning effort wasn't the problem the pain and sadness continue to haunt me which woman wants to repair the damage that another woman has left behind

[@NederlandseGeschiedenis]

@@breakupbradbrowningmaybe my love for het and her daughter was higher then the love there have for me

[@cecilyremy7899]

Interesting

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hi! Thanks for dropping by.

[@cecilyremy7899]

@@breakupbradbrowning you're welcome.

[@fatimasalie3911]

Yeah.....poor comunicatìon😊

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Hey, thanks for dropping by!

[@marguskiis7711]

Avoidants can act with another people totally differrent way. Not talked much, but avoidant women like to be with alco/drug addicted men and they act much more careful with them. My avoidant ex acted ruthless and really avoidant with me. But she had had a alco/drug addicted bf and she was really devoted to him, always stormed to save him after every trouble, hold his hand in hospidal, tried to entertain him etc.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Yes, attachments style change based on who you're in a relationship with. This applies to you and your ex but they don't usually change styles with one person if you've known them to be one way. It's important to take time to really get to know someone first.

[@marguskiis7711]

​@@breakupbradbrowning people like to wear masks during the dating time. And avoidants are usually very good on it. Yes, the avoidant ex talked a lot how she likes to be independent etc but is it a bad thing? How I could know it is a element of a horrible mental disorder?

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thanks for sharing. Avoidants often do well with secure attachment styles but oftentimes, I find they attract anxious types and vice versa.

[@wendydaniel1110]

You're only want an Avoidant ex back if you are unhealed from your own childhood trauma. NO healthy healed person would ever want them back. They are packed with unhealed trauma and that's what they puke back out on you. When you love and choose your happiness, you walk , period.❤

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Avoidants usually attract the anxious types but with enough understanding, love and patience, the anxious attacher can eventually become secure through this relationship. However, yes, it's a long way to go but it happens.

[@JosephEbiagbor]

Hello I was scrolling through the app and I got a psychic divination about you“it appears you are still in love with someone whose access is limited, whom you think doesn’t love you back,am I correct?

[@joancollins3457]

I am an avoidant. I can’t bear the thought of being engulfed by another. My ex is the same, but he never knew I had the same fears as he does. He just sees himself as a loner. I’m a training therapist so I’ve been doing a lot of self reflection whilst studying so I’m aware of attachment styles. Had he asked I could have told him a lot, he didn’t. He left and I let him go.

[@breakupbradbrowning]

Thanks for sharing. Yes, like I always say, the decision is ultimately up to you. You know your situation and your ex best. Sometimes a relationship can be salvaged and worth the save but sometimes it isn't, especially if there's cheating or some other type of abuse involved or if you just don't understand each other anymore.

[@ladybird3447]

Oh, one more question: would you be willing to avoid jumping the vid? U r awesome and I would like to see you not only listening because of this strange thing 🫣🤭Content super! Please keep going! Avoidants of the world let’s unite and heal together for the better future all of us 🙌