The EXACT moment Rory's downfall begins | Gilmore Girls

Guys, I know the exact moment Rory goes bad in Gilmore Girls.
05:51 - the moment
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[@yourfavouriteduck6545]

Switching to chilton is where I'd put the start of Rory's downfall. The fact that the grandparents paid for it undid everything her mom had taught her by example so far about self-reliance

[@Silverscreenfreak]

You know what I think you’re on to something

[@MELLMAO]

I wouldn't agree. I think it's important to learn that you sometimes need help from others and can't always rely on yourself. Chilton was a huge investment and Lorelei was right in choosing her daughter's education over her pride. She even offered to pay the money back and her parents resented her for it

[@yourfavouriteduck6545]

@@MELLMAO I don't blame Lorelai at all for wanting to make things easier for her daughter, but iirc correctly Rory was doing well enough at her public school and there wasn't really a need to switch to a private except that it's presumably a faster way to success. I think this taught Rory that there's only the fast way or no way, ignoring her mom as living proof that you can succeed without rushing

[@sararobles8655]

I don't agree, I think that going to Chilton was good to Rory, because she couldn't get everything SO easy. She had to study really hard and deal with frustration, she had no privilege in comparison to the other students. At the public school, she was probably treated like a genius, like everywhere in Star Hollows. The problem I see, is that she didn't learn a THING from this experience :/

[@gro8018]

@@Silverscreenfreak I honestly that this video was going to be about the time she got hit by a dear.

[@askdianavlogs]

One of my absolute favorite moments of Gilmore Girls is with that judge who calls Rory an entitled privileged kid right after she steals the yacht. It would have been nice to see more characters with that sense of judgment calling out Rory for her behavior.

[@bookpotato]

I remember when I was young and watching that scene I was like :O how dare he call her entitled. And now I'm like thank god SOMEONE had the sense to tell her that.

[@kerriethompson2073]

I loved it when Logan called her out for her privilege as well! That was one time I actually repeated him, but I got pissed when he apologized later.

[@withniejules2244]

I say her downfall was when she skipped school to see Jess, and miss Lorelai's graduation at the business school. That was the only time she would get to finally see her mother walk on the stage, and she risked it to see Jess. Her mom only started the whole thing for her. It was nice that at least her grandparents came, but it was just a huge event that she shouldn't have even risked missing. I think what brought it home was when I thought of all the sacrifices Lorelai made just, so that they could be more stable (I assume that she made this decision before she got involved w/ her parents again).

[@user-yw4ij9pk3c]

Ehh she wasn’t “risking”it. She genuinely thought she would make it. She was just dumb to not know she was on a local bus and not an express one

[@gabrielleporter553]

@@user-yw4ij9pk3c good point- but could that maybe show some of her downfall? A decline in being a fact checker, being deliberate. Like- the girl who made lists for everything and planned out schedules messed up the buses? idk just kind of a thought

[@azzz7279]

yes and plus Rory was with Dean when she ditched school to visit Jess in New York and she knew that Dean would get mad about it. It’s like Rory liked having 2 guys interested in her and fighting over her.

[@lebrilopejackalope5775]

Yeahhh, I know this may be an unpopular opinion because viewers like Jess' character, but Rory just got progressively worse when he appeared. She cheated on her boyfriend who was nothing but good to her, she picked fights with her mom just because she didn't like Jess even though he hardly tried to be nice to her. Watching the show as an adult I just can't help to sympathize with Lorelai. I didn't like Jess, not until he got some character development AFTER they broke up and he moved on away from her. I understand she was a teenager and teenagers make bad choices sometimes, but the problem it's the writers NEVER made her grow out of it. She was constantly making bad decisions, never got over her bad boy phase. Not even in the revival where she's 30+ years old, she just got worst and worst, I honestly couldn't even finish watching the revival because of it.

[@nostalgia545]

I’m glad she didn’t make it honestly. It was almost like Lorelei’s real graduation with her parents. As if Rory was never born and Lorelei wasn’t a single mother

[@kitana5583]

I actually think "The Moment" is when her and Jess crass her car. The way everyone bends over backwards and forwards to remove any accountability from her and dump in on someone else was so bad that even she got annoyed but ultimately it was a mentality she internalized for the rest of the series.

[@yohanedescends4683]

its sad since she had to remain everyone that the car crash wasn't jess' fault and that she isn't a perfect little girl but no one cared to listen. jess wasnt a good boyfriend but i think he had an important prescene in the show, he showed rory the issues with their town with their treatment of him and also how they treated her

[@valentinatroncoso5274]

you're right, but I think the same thing happened even before that when Rory and Dean broke up. they broke up because Dean told her "I love you" (questionable, but still, that was the real reason), but Rory's story was that Dean didn't want to be her boyfriend anymore. so the whole town hated him because "he dumped her, Rory, poor thing"

[@mzelk995]

but the car crash was no one’s fault, it was an accident. rory was emotionally cheating but the car crash had nothing to do with that

[@missmoon.]

@@mzelk995 I think you missed the point

[@charlie7694]

@@mzelk995 The problem is that she never corrected anyone that it wasn't Jess's fault. She let everyone believe that he was guilty and she was the innocent little girl.

[@rainy905]

I’m sure that the whole famdom will agree with me on this: oviously, no one is perfect, I just think that rory’s devolopment is realistic for someone in her position. rory’s environment does contribute alot to this because everyone arounds her spoils the hell out of her. its not just Lorelai’s fault and Rory’s grandparents fault.There’s the fact that the whole town treats rory like a princess majority of the time. its Crystal clear that this went into her head and ego, cause the second someone doesn't like her, natually Rory goes crazy. I will also add the fact that Lorelei is not only too easy on her like you said, She also treats Rory like a friend more than her kid.

[@lebrilopejackalope5775]

Yep, I do like the interesting family dynamics the show explores. In a way, both Lorelai's and Rory's upbringing it's sort of dysfunctional in completely opposite ways. Lorelai grew up with an overbearing mother with high expectations of her, who expected her to give up her individuality to fit in the high society. Then she got pregnant and ran away, and basically decided she didn't want to be anything like her mother, so did the exact opposite when raising Rory: she was a best friend to her, they had this crazy close bond with each other. She wasn't strict, didn't set many rules, she even said it herself she didn't like playing the mom card often. I like how it basically proves neither extreme it's right, since children need warm and nurture, but they also need a parent figure and stability. You can have many friends who will come and go, but a mother it's irreplaceble. But the best part about it it's that it shows parents as HUMAN. Neither Emily nor Lorelai are actually bad mothers, they both care about their daughters (even if they have very different ways to show it), but they both made mistakes, mistakes that resulted in either having a daughter who resents her mother but who managed to suceed on her own, or a daughter with slight co-dependent issues who couldn't fully develop as a person.

[@lpoco0006]

Also, being glorified by the entire town, Rory thinks that it‘s a sacrifice for her to let the others treat her like a princess. LoL. She is so generous

[@jackiesliterarycorner]

Yes, I think that realizing Rory is not perfect, but a flawed human being is realistic character development and provides interesting discussion for viewers. I wonder if most people see it that way or do some fans get mad that Rory is critiqued by other fans.

[@workoncruiseship]

Agreed! She absolutely loses it if someone doesn't like her. She can't take criticism well and has awful self-esteem. I know of people who are exactly like Rory. If someone doesn't like them, they have to know why, they have to "fix" it. Why?! Just let it go and accept the fact that most people in this world (I don't care who you are) will not like you. And most won't even have an exact reason of why- they just don't like you. Move on and get over it.

[@ibetterbearoundyou]

It’s just Lorelei not wanting to be like her mother, that she ends up not being a mother at all.

[@omeeshakrishnan]

i think my biggest problem with rory isn’t her but the fact that no one ever seems to tell her she’s messing up or confront her for anything, especially her lack of accountability. I think it can be argued that her lack of accountability comes from constant free-passes she gets from her family and community when she does things that should lead to growth. and even if there isn’t any growth, it’s as if no one notices her bad behavior. it’s like the viewer is being gaslit into thinking rory is the epitome of everything.

[@michellederoo6280]

I love the way you put it: like the viewer’s being gaslighted into thinking Rory is the epitome of everything

[@Bella-gg4oz]

Ouuuu interesting take and nice addition of the use of the word gaslit.

[@sandrae2398]

!!!!

[@Yourmeantoday]

I think Logan was the only that did.

[@sananne3681]

Nope! This is not true. Lane calls her out when she feels abandoned in favour of Dean. (Rory is then regretful and apologizes sincerely) Lorelai calls her out for not being able to choose between Dean and Jess (Rory clearly admits to this when she goes to see Dean after the breakup, doesn't want to rub her new relationship in his nose, etc.) When she misses her mother's graduation, HOLY SHIT is she guilt-ridden. God forbid a 16 year old be controlled by her hormones one single day instead of the acting like a mini-adult, rational at all times. Lorelai very clearly calls her out for sleeping with Dean when he was married (Rory calls her from Rome and admits that she messed up, tries to make things right even if it backfires). The literal authorities don't let her get away with stealing a boat, pointing her that her privilege won't get her out of it (she completes the community service and takes it very seriously) Lorelai sets firm boundaries after Rory drops out of Yale and doesn't give her a pass by any means. Jess calls her out for not being at Yale (she starts snapping out of it and getting her stuff in order after) When she freezes out her dad and later finds out his dad died, she himself seeks to amend the relationship and take care of him in that moment. Jess tells her it's unfair that she kisses him, that he doesn't deserve to be treated that way (she acknowledges her intentions were selfish) Logan calls her out for being "one of them" (she doesn't accept it right away, but she later acknowledges that the article was awful and that everything he said was true, and that it was time for her to move out and take care of her own living situation). Lucy calls her out for not telling the truth about Marty (Rory owns up to this and is clearly in pain about hurting Lucy. Takes time and carefully thinks about how to reach out to her again) Is she perfect? Not at all. But saying that she's never called out or never takes accountability is mischaracterizing her and the show as well.

[@Anna_Priscilla]

The "study tree" thing made me SO ANNOYED at Rory, I started to see her in a totally different light. It was just so entitled and bratty. Glad some people tried to call her attention on that and she let it go, but it didn't fix the whole issue.

[@onemillionpercent]

exactly like what it's literally just a tree

[@lunaticlemonk1077]

tbh I think she's neurodivergent. I found that relatable and not spoilt at all because of her reasoning as it's like it was a significant spot to her the way she expressed how she felt about it. Rory did do some self entitled things ngl, but some things she does and expresses are definitely autistic or adhd traits.

[@onemillionpercent]

@@lunaticlemonk1077 i'm nd too but it's not rly an excuse for being an asshole. i actually don't think that's a sign of nd, getting attached to objects. i think it's a trait that some people have more than others, and in its extremity it can symbolize the spectrum. but i think it's normal for some humans to put significance on objects whilst others just see objects as they are, and either party can be neurotypical/neurodivergent. rory seemed pretty neurotypical to me, but of course no one knows better than the person themselves and higher authoritu. she was just growing up.

[@laurenswift9368]

I thought she sounded exactly like Lorelai. What Lorelai would say to a stranger.

[@Julia-js]

I was like GIRL sit on the other side of the tree!! sometimes this show didn't make sense

[@shboomgirl]

I honestly don't care that Rory is kind of a mess in the original show - she's just a teen / early twenty something. People aren't perfect and they do dumb shit at that age. What I found deeply disturbing however is that between the series ending and the reboot, she had literally not grown an inch. In my experience, so much growth happens between the ages of 22 and 30, but unfortunately the writers just let her completely stagnate. Same with Lorelai and Luke btw, even though I found it a little more forgiveable, because they were already older when the show ended.

[@cordeliacuthbert]

yes the reboot was even worse than s6-7 and that is something....kind of ironic that the original showrunners intended the reboot to “fix” the last seasons and they just made it worse. they only created those problems to have a plot.

[@ayamostafa9797]

I think both Rory and Lorelei was so narcissistic and self centered to see their problems. My problem with the show is that they made them look perfect in the eyes of the others. Lorelei was the most Annoying character always using ppl for her own benefit, not forgetting talking tooooo much with nothing to say and throwing jokes that aren’t funny at all and pretending that everyone is stupid or dull for not liking them and she says a lot of ugly stuff in her jokes, her moral code suddenly appears when she have to do something to her mother or someone she doesn’t like but not holding her from steeling, running from her wedding, do completely selfish acts like manipulating ppl and using them. The thing with the hotel running perfectly with that lousy decisions I saw in many episodes doesn’t make sense, as for Rory I think she got it all from her mom and she was literally living the life her mom wanted for her, when she moved to college she didn’t fit in and her bad manners kept on going like cheating. I remember seeing the first episodes where she talked about her dream of being a journalist, and she was thinking of Harvard’s since she was 4 you can clearly see that these was Lorelei dreams and that this job fits with Lorelei personality and nature more

[@tkay7950]

That’s the most frustrating part of the revival to me - that the Palladino’s were so set on their ending for the characters that they just took a storyline that was meant for a 20 year old and just shoved it on a 30 year old. (Though even if that had been the ending to the original show I would have been upset - having Rory essentially doomed to repeat her mother’s life when it wasn’t what she wanted for herself? Ugh)

[@countingstars1651]

when I finished my college studies, stayed at home, worked temporarily in different jobs then again stayed at home, I felt that time has stopped for me while my friends where fully living their lives and having new things happening.. Then depression made its way to my head, having nothing worth doing, having the same boring routine everyday, and giving up so early because I didnt have strong personality, all this stops your development and makes you live in the same circle for many years, it's a chain that you have to break as soon as possible ... If the present me could give the young me a piece of advice it would be like : never give up, never stop trying and experiencing new things

[@ayamostafa9797]

@@countingstars1651 I have faced the same thing at college always being a top student with the minimal effort and my life was all together and organized when I got into medical school I have struggled the most in my life took my 7 years in 9 now I’m in the last year improved a lot in many aspect but still struggling especially in self discipline and self esteem and have to deal with all by myself along with my depression and bipolar

[@eugeniahanniffy2724]

I would like to come in Lorelai’s defense and remind us all that she had Rory in high school. When you are such a young mother and have to navigate the world of parenting AND adulting (she did not even graduate high school or get a chance to have a standard growing-up experience) simultaneously, without support of a father and your parents, you have a different set of emotional needs. I suspect Lorelai needed a best friend and a figure of support, but since Rory was the only constant person in her life, Lorelai moulded her into what she needed. By being a strict parent and having to hold her daughter accountable, she would have had to risk of pushing away someone she was emotionally dependent on. Is that right of her? Not really, but if you had a child at 16/17 with barely any support from or good relationship with your family , your needs would not be the same as one of an emotionally developed, financially stable adult with a substantial support system of people around you

[@justagirl19]

That is true! The mothet of a friend of mine had her when she was very young too( not as young as Lorelai but around 25ish). The dad soon after cheated on the mother and the grandparents where around but no real support. Immeadiantly the daughter became the "best friend". She way the one the mother told her all about her romatic intrestes or experience and barly raised her. The problem here is that the children than feel like being the adult. They don't get a moral compas or have time to grow up since they have to be an adult from a young age. Unfortunatly it went similar with Rory with her. Her boyfriend broke up with her, she started to have a lot of F+, got into weird party sence and it got so bad that i couldn't defend our friendship anymore. What i wanna say that is character developement kind of normal with this type of growing up. Funny enough my friend was really good and driven in school too

[@marijak6669]

@@justagirl19 25ish isnt that young anymore, u cant compare 16 and 25, its totally different especially when raising a kid. My mom got pregnant when she was 18 with my brother and im not gonna get into much detail but basically the father wasnt really around, neither were the granparents but she managed to raise a good man even tho they lived in complete poverty with no support, i think it really depends on the person and how emotionally strong they are.

[@justagirl19]

@@marijak6669 you are probably right. I also was talkimg about the "treating as best friend part". A child of a mother who doesn't do this is probably way better off and doesn't end up as rory. But what should i say...i don't know. It is all assumtions

[@sierrahargrave]

my mom and i have a similar best-friend relationship that lorelai and rory have. what i see is a mom who struggled and couldn’t give her kid everything she wanted (and possibly in the early years some things she needed) and bc of that foundation (and a little bit of luck) by 16 rory was a well-behaved kid, who held herself to a certain standard (similar to me at that age) she was certainly not spoiled when we first meet her. and when your kid is like that, as a parent who wants to have a good, healthy, two-way relationship with your kid, lorelai (similar to my mom with me) took it easy on rory when she started to “screw up” as a teen and young adult. she felt rory’s own standards and conscience would be enough to correct her own course, however (both in the show and in my, again, paralleled experience) that doesn’t always cut it to teach a lesson from certain mistakes and certain attitudes. i think once rory asked her grandparents to pay for yale, that’s when she lost a lot of the “bootstrapping” lorelai exemplified for her. she got the money in a snap, all she did was have a conversation and suddenly, she had a guaranteed college fund, out of thin air. her years at yale compound this and she shows the signs of privilege and entitlement that comes from that. and with all of that, lorelai, at that point in rory’s life, has more that she can give and do for her. she is at a really good place in her career, and no longer has to scrimp as much as she did as a teen and young adult mom, and from my mother’s experience, in my early life we had very little materially, and as i got older, we had a little more so she gave me more (things, experiences, financial support, etc) because as a mother that’s what you want to do. and when you couldn’t for many years, you want to that much more when you can. i think lorelai was a very responsible mother in those early years, and some of the foundations she set at that time got ruined over the years of changed circumstances.

[@ananyagupta3917]

@@justagirl19 25 is a very normal age for someone to have a child considering the fact that 18 or 21 is the legal age for marriage in most countries. And by then you have finished high school or college and are an adult. I dont think it spells disaster if you are best friends with your child. The problem lies with oversharing and not setting boundaries. Rory was given all the rights to comment on every aspect of Lorelai's life and that is wrong. Also, Lorelai is not a great role model for Rori. First she runs away from home at 16. She doesn't try to make ammends with her parents even when they try to reach out. She runs away from her wedding to Max on her wedding day and gives no explanation at all and no one asks her anything either. Even Rori reacts like its any other day. Any time Lorelai has a problem, she either runs away or ignores the issue until it blows up in her face like the debacle at Emily and Richards wedding. When Lorelai needed money, she went to her parents. First she got money for Chilton and then her dad did the inn's insurance. Lorelai wwanted to pay Richard back for Chilton but she does it with a check Richard himself gave her. Rori is doing exactly the same things her mother has done. She went and got money for Yale. She moved in with them when she wanted to quit Yale. Both mother and daughter have used Emily and Richard for money whenever they were in a pinch and never really had to pay any of it back.

[@oliviapanzica8833]

This is a topic I love analyzing! I feel like Rory was set up to be a spoiled brat from childhood. Time and time again, Loralai brags about having the perfect daughter who practically raised herself, and that’s the problem. Loralai never raised Rory, or at least never acted as a parent. Rory was brought up with a mom who would always buy takeout, candy all the books she wanted (Not that these things are bad, but it shows how the two them would indulge in whatever they wanted. It also rubs me the wrong way how they never seemed to any food in their house and how everything Loralai fed Rory was unhealthy.) Loralai also relied on Rory for emotional support instead of being a parental figure to her. I think that messed Rory up a lot. In addition, Loralai herself also often puts herself first, before Luke, Sookie, Max etc, and always acted like the victim. That clearly rubbed off on Rory.

[@swaggygirl3516]

I do feel like saying Lorelei wasn’t a parental figure to Rory is wrong and a huge overstatement. Sure she was friendly and quirky but she wasn’t permissive, she set boundaries and took extreme care of Rory. Treating her like she is a perfect angel sure is a bad idea but i suppose it was the way Rory behaved before the series started. In my opinion what made Rory unsufferable during the Yale years was the fact that she was a rich privileged legacy kid who identified as lower middle class. And i think it gets pretty clear during a year in the life when she wants to appropriate her mother’s story as her own. She sees herself as this scrappy kid who had to face challenges to get by when in reality she was always spoiled she never even had to work during high school, she got everything handed on a silver platter.

[@nightingalenef1764]

@@swaggygirl3516 This.

[@geeky_sasha6813]

@@swaggygirl3516 I agree. I mean, it's definitely problematic that she says "we're best friend's first, mother and daughter second". That may be sort of ok with a child, and one who is naturally more mature from spending so much time with adults, but with a teen it becomes a problem. However, Lorelai makes mistakes but tries to teach her right from wrong and gives her the example of hard work. Lorelai went from being a single mother with no high school diploma to a successful business owner. However, Rory ended up so coddled by both her mother and her grandparents that she can't cope with reality. There's a lot of the 'road to hell is paved with good intentions' going on.

[@swaggygirl3516]

@@geeky_sasha6813 definitely agree but it kind of rubs me the wrong way when ppl say lorelei didn’t act like a mother when she actually was a good mom, sure she made mistakes but nobody raises a perfect child especially alone

[@geeky_sasha6813]

@@swaggygirl3516 oh, I agree. I think Lorelei was overall a great mom, and I think most of us would’ve loved having her as a mom. It’s part of what makes me so mad when Rory’s shitty to her.

[@katekoto5609]

In my opinion, Rory was indeed a great kid/teen. It's interesting that most of the comments and the video focus on Lorelai and the way she raised her, blame the grandparents, even the town but forget to mention Christopher. He was the father so he was equally responsible for Rory. Yet, he was absent, irresponsible and unaccountable. I think that this is the source of Rory's insecurity and the reason she always tries to find stability and please her partners, altering fundamental traits of her personality. Rory tried to balance between a life her mother escaped from and an entitled life she entered again when she started Chilton. And that wasn't easy to handle.

[@bill3487]

spot on! I never got why no one ever mentions Chris, but he's always absent so it makes sense...

[@SonicaLuda]

100% correct. But we all know he was a deadbeat and he never tried to paint himself as father of the year. Obviously his absence affected Rory but the one that shaped her was Lorelai.

[@FreyaEinde]

I think Rory is one of those people who is considered a “good kid” because for so much of her childhood she’s non-confrontational with the adults in her life when she should actually be rebelling that she becomes a total kid as an adult unable to regulate her true emotions because a lot of her life has been about being who other people want her to be. Her dad’s a flake and her mother has made it mission to prove that Rory didn’t ruin her life and presses her into the prep school world and Yale even though…is it even any good for Rory? So Rory more or less bounces between a world of no real accountability and never knowing her actual self because she’s on the hook for that much. So feels realistic.

[@HanonSama]

IDK, as someone with a dead beat dad AND mom,who was raised by their grandparents, I would say you can't blame other people for your mentality on life. More importantly, your morality shouldn't come from a victimhood mentality. Right is right and wrong is wrong. Rory began lying, cheating, stealing, and then blamed other people for her problems! What did her mom or dad have to do with that? She grew up to be an entitled, selfish brat. It would be different if she was the quirky nerdy girl still, but we clearly see her character reached a point of no return.

[@bill3487]

@@HanonSama that's true but I feel like parents who are in a kids life have a responsibility to make sure that kid is fairly disciplined with a strong moral compass and ready to survive in the real world. If not, they have failed their biggest duty. Lorelai never did that. Even from early in the show Rory would mess up or do side eye worthy things, Lorelai would always defend Rory and gloss over all of it with a she's "a good kid" response. Most parents probably think their child is a good kid but that is no excuse for when they do very wrong things, it must be addressed and corrected. Rory barely faced repercussions in her life because her mother protected her from them all and even if she did it was always outside people and she handled them like a brat. I think Rory internalised this moving forward that she did not have to think before she acted and can get away with everything. She had a very strong "hey I can do very messed up things and disregard others because I'm the well praised Rory who can never do wrong" mindset throughout the whole show, she just exposed it more in the later seasons.

[@anabelletaylor6124]

2:23 oh my gosh that whole “my tree” thing made me so upset. Who does she think she is?

[@christinejoygatchalian8197]

Right? She felt so entitled to a damn tree and complained to Lorelai about it when it's just a simple ass conflict. Good for Lorelai for telling Rory to suck it up

[@cordeliacuthbert]

omg am I the only one who is not reading that much into this? It was supposed to be a funny scene. She was extremely stressed by her roommates and Stars Hollow and that was the only place where she could study. And the guy, who only read a magazine, coincidentally chose the tree for himself as well. It wasn't like she screamed at him to get the tree back, she kindly asked him and at the end also (sort of) gave in. I think if he hadn't taken the money she would have left him alone. Like c'mon people....it's not that deep.

[@jclyntoledo]

@@cordeliacuthbert I mostly agree with you but she was a bit priveleged. I don't know anyone who would literally complain and then pay someone just to sit under a tree 😂😂. Like it's a huge ass campus. It would have been more realistic if she found another tree or someplace else. You can reserve rooms to study in at your school library.

[@cordeliacuthbert]

@@jclyntoledo again I think they created the scene for some comic relief, not to hyper analyse it on how entitled Rory is haha, so even as a kid I never read much into that scene, just that Rory was super stressed and when she finally found some peace someone got in her way again. idk about you but sometimes when you are so tired and stressed you freak out about minor things like that.

[@debapriyabhatta8373]

MY TREE! MY DEAN! MY TOWN! (remember when Jess came to "visit" his car?)

[@amberdeterman5815]

She is 100% insecure. And I blame her mom and the entire town. Imagine growing up and everyone telling you how perfect you are. You feel like you can do anything and you do. Then you have a fe people tell you the truth or get upset with you and you lose your mind. Shes the worst but I love the stupid, problematic show.

[@goofball2228]

Exactly! Trust me if she had a realistic life, she would literally break like a toothpick.

[@Demonsta]

I don't think it was entirely that. Consider that from a very young age, before the show started, Rory grew up watching how hard her mom worked as a single parent, raising Rory while managing a successful business, and yet her grandparents - who Rory loved and respected - never approved, it was never good enough. Rory internalised that toxic vision of success long before the audience ever met her.

[@Miverlove-wh3wb]

​@@Demonsta I know. I don't really blame her mom like everyone else.

[@jude508.3]

bro diffrent people react to criticism than other dont blame people or a community for how thery behave everyone is built different

[@mercurialmermaid]

what about christopher, i feel he deserves at least 70% of the blame

[@tatianabrandicova37919]

Idk why are people so dissatisfied with how Rory turned out. She was treated like some miracle her whole life so when she met the real world she crumbled. Plus she is the embodyment of burned out gifted kid.... There is plenty of people that were so talented in their childhood but the pressure and many more things gave them issues they had hard times dealing with. She literally had to tap-dance when she felt anxious for God's sake.... We loved her and it's sad to see her downfall but it was predictable and if you think about it it's totally normal. I'm not even mad about it because it's what happens to people like Rory.

[@yanamolina661]

Yeah but she didn’t learn anything, she didn’t realize that the things she did was affecting others. She did a lot of bad things but she had no consequences for them, she was protected from her grandparents when Lorelai was finally putting her foot down, and then Lorelai protected her when her grandparents was trying to scold her, very reasonable may I add, given they pay a lot of money for her. And she not even grateful or learn to be or developed. Which is what you do with characters.

[@annabourbon]

@@yanamolina661 to be honest it does takes a while to realize what your behavior is. Look at Lorelai.

[@daniellegallegos8741]

I can agree with this. Up to that point, she used her moral compass, but Loralie made lying, okay.

[@jtcr17]

@@yanamolina661 everyone does bad things. It’s called being human and make mistakes

[@lifeofbean3332]

I don't think its the pressure in her case. She does not seem to know what she wants, purpose-wise. Paris grew up under tremendous pressure but she was purpose driven. Rory wanted Harward just because / to prove a point that she is super special (she was not). She was the same with her partners - sleeping with married dean because "he was hers first" and not because she had any sort of plan or good intentions with these relationships. In the end of the day she is a spoiled kid who believed she is entitled to anything and so she could not even figure out what exactly and why she needed

[@Sam-0827]

Rory’s character decline is literally historical lol. It was so sudden, at least that’s what I thought. Looking back, it was always there.

[@Wanderlust_human2]

What do you mean it was always there?

[@LS-qw3ez]

As some ppl have said, her flaws made her realistic. But I think some self-awareness and attempt at correction would also have been realistic, and certainly a nicer example for all of us growing up. She did correct some things (like moving back home and returning to school), but it still felt kind of grudgingly? I think the unsettling thing was that we thought we knew her character and personality (people do change and evolve, but usually certain things remain constant), but were surprised when she did things that went against her supposed traits: being sweet and quirky. It was like seeing a child and a projected image of who they would become, and then watching them grow into someone completely different.

[@farwakhan4423]

There is so much you can excuse under the banner of being human and a teen or having flaws that make you realistic. If the realism was to show that she's self-centred, entitled and feel like everyone around her owes her something, making mistakes without impunity, then yeah I guess they nailed the realism lmao.

[@emmacook3065]

I get what you mean. S4 Rory is a big mix of good and bad, which is a good depiction of every 19 year old in existence- the thing that makes a 19 year old less shitty is to get slapped across the face by life and reflect and change. This simple function could have been made a part of her character and the story- it would have been so much fun to see in the show.

[@bbblueblun]

Unpopular Opinion: Mitchum wasn’t so bad. He constantly wanted Logan to be better, do better, finally mature like he himself once had. And he said to Richard that if Rory did have what it took to succeed, then she would be able to bounce back despite his criticism towards her. Plus he was not rude and disrespectful to Rory like the rest of Logan’s family was and he apologized for the way they had treated her when she had dinner at their house. I just don’t think he’s that bad. I think at that point in the show where he was introduced, I even liked him more than I liked Rory.

[@anainesgonzalez8868]

I agree

[@david7996]

I think it started long before even going to chilton. I remember her arguing with Lorelai when she didnt want to change schools because of Dean in the very first episode. It really showed how she was used to being treated as Lorelai's friend rather than as her daughter. She was already a bit spoiled at that point, and her grandparents made that 10 times worse, sometimes even sabotaging Lorelai's parenting.

[@jtcr17]

She was a teen 🤣. What did you expect?

[@IDontWantThisStupidHandle]

I mean, I was an army brat who lived in literally 20 states, and went to more schools than years of education. Every time my parents told me to pack up and leave everything and everyone behind, I got very hurt and upset. Now, add the feeling of just having met your first ever crush into the mix, and I could totally see a teenager not wanting to change schools and start over (especially so close to graduation). That doesn't make her a brat in my book -- just someone who cannot fully understand the long-term consequences of turning down a chance to move up in the world (and, guess what, that literally describes everyone under the age of 25 as our brains aren't fully developed until 25, and we don't completely understand what "life-long" effects of decisions truly are until then).

[@gracieofgod8899]

I dunno, I felt like Rory in the pilot was very different from Rory in the rest of season 1. She felt more mature and less quirky then.

[@automnejoy5308]

​@@IDontWantThisStupidHandle Rory was old enough and smart enough to understand what a big deal it was to get into Chilton, and how important it was. I'm not sure the army brat comparison works. You never wanted to move. You never asked for that. And it didn't benefit you at all, really. Rory always wanted to go to Chilton. It was part of her larger dreams of going to Harvard and becoming a world class journalist, which she articulated to the dean on her first day. But because she had a swoony encounter with a boy she barely knew, she suddenly acted resentful towards her mother, who was simply acting to fulfill the dreams that Rory herself had. This kind of behavior would repeat again and again. I always felt like Rory was rebellious just for the sake of being rebellious. She never cares about how ungrateful she comes across. It's kind of perverse and even a bit sadistic, like she enjoys tormenting people by constantly changing her mind and putting them off balance. That's why, I think, so many people don't like her.

[@Sam-0827]

5:08 this is such an interesting point to start the downfall and honestly, it makes sense. Lorelai definitely defended her actions all the time, and Rory also learnt the flighty avoidant non confrontational behaviour from lorelai. But also Rory is her own person, it’s interesting to see how instead of trying to avoid the mistakes her mom made, she did similar things

[@p0pp4]

My impression was that the Series was the book Rory wrote, all sweetness and light not mention carefully curated to make it seem perfect and a Year in the Life was the ugly reality of the situation where the flaws are up-front and center.

[@Silverscreenfreak]

That’s an interesting way to look at it!

[@stuffwithsoph8264]

I love Gilmore Girls and disecting characters and their decisions but I think it's pretty simple: the writers aren't as clever as people think or the writer themselves think. Gilmore Girls is great, don't get me wrong but Amy Sherman Palladino writes forced character drama, this is pretty visible with Dean, Jess, Rory, Lorelai, Christopher and more, she tries to do Jane Austen without fully understanding Jane Austen.

[@ihay472]

Yes! This!

[@derekalexandersmith]

Agreed! She often puts her characters in unbelievable situations and struggles to get them out. So very often the characters seem stupid, privileged or stagnant. They are constantly doing things with no consequences that would ruin any real person.

[@toriyt2714]

Yes!

[@LifeOfAVagabond143]

Underrated comment! Absolutely, 100%!

[@Bella-gg4oz]

Ou. Interesting comment. Can you please go into more detail about what you mean?

[@LabyrinthTaylorsVersion]

she is literally ghostin Dean all the second season and people expect that he doesn't get mad about it. She cheats on him. the guy who takes her to buy books, the same guy who never tried to forced her to anything and he decided to broke up with her, because she wasnt ready to say "i love you" (first season) and the entire town hates on him, (and beats him) without knowing that he doesn't do anything wrong. Literally he made her a car. A CAR that she crash with the guy who Dean was supposted "not to be worried about." And She never faces the consequences. Dean ruins his own marriage, but the fact that Rory enjoys controlling the situation with "he was mine first" says a lot of a narcissist personality and not empathy at all. she was like that all the time, since the first season. *sorry about my english is not my firts language**

[@TheMarkmcr]

She also has sociopathic traits

[@elinasaksakulm5725]

I totally agree. The lack of morality seems to be a textbook narcissist/sociopathic behavioural traits. A lot of these decisions are morality based and she was old enough to be accountable for her decisions. Even a kid understands right from wrong. For example I don`t think lying once about a kiss was some gateaway for serial cheating/lying/hiding. Most people have few white lies yet they don`t become pathological in their ways.

[@iwatchytwhenimbored1636]

never apologize about your english! i agree with what you’re saying, rory cheated on dean, hung out with the guy she knew he hated, & crashed the car he made for her. but everybody blamed jess, a single guy, for everything

[@lizaharris5026]

your English appears to be well written. I am studying English in college right now and I don't see grammar mistakes.

[@TheMarkmcr]

@@elinasaksakulm5725 people like that aren't too uncommon in wealthy families

[@desireemudry]

What i love about this show is that it reveals that bad people aren't always easily seen as such. You can be pretty, get good grades; love your mom; volunteer for charity and still be a bad person. Your character isn't defined by the good you do. It's defined by the choices you make when life isn't easy. Rory's choices prove she's not a good person and that's what makes her such a good character. Yes there are evil people in the world or people who want to be bad but also people who are bad that either don't realize it or refuse to change their behavior out of selfishness. She reveals this throughout the story and I believe that most people would justify her actions through her upbringing but she really did have all the tools. Everyone told me I wouldn't amount to anything because of my upbringing but they were all wrong. I make my own choices, we all do. It's okay to make a mistake, it's human. But to justify the pattern of choices people make in tv or real life because we idolize them or simply love them is discrediting to our humanistic all emcompassing instinct to be good.

[@romaeedwards2774]

thisss>>>>> you dont even understand how happy, for a lack of a better word, i am to see this comment. its nothing but the truth. even if it may be from a tv show, i cant help but think that it does highlight a need for REAL life INDIVIDUAL accountability

[@snoopstheboss994]

This is spot on.... She is not stupid and should be able to figure out the implications of her actions. So despite this she continues to lie and take not accountability.

[@bubblyfrog5]

Now this is a really interesting take. I always thought her decline started when she slept with married Dean. But you're right, actually started earlier than that

[@Abstractor21]

Nah it didn't she was still a teenager at that time we all did stupid things. She was almost 20 when she slept with married dean plus that's a horrible thing to do more than cheating on your boyfriend (at 17)

[@jamieeubanks539]

I wonder what would’ve happened if she and Lorelei had had more of an open minded approach to therapy instead of referring to it as “having your head shrunk” or declaring rory a “nut” when the psych wanted her to come back weekly. Some therapy might’ve helped Rory adjust her worldview and self image.

[@vontrude3310]

this! for me it’s obvious that Lorelei has ADHD….I see u Lor 😅

[@nerijas5295]

YES. I was SO annoyed that Rory’s big “breakthrough,” as far as the show cared, was OMG I BROKE UP WITH LOGAN AND NOW I CAN’T BUY COFFEE FROM THAT ONE CART. Like, I fully believe that’s the crisis a person would cling to in that moment, but to leave it at that, like it was just an LOL Rory loves coffee and isn’t therapy amusing joke? 🙄

[@bookpotato]

I think the writer did therapy dirty tbh

[@AvecPoesie]

Rory has a lot of unhealed trauma associated with having an almost completely absent Father in Christopher. She was never able to maintain a truly healthy relationship with men and if that final scene in Year in the Life is anything to go by, she is likely repeating a cycle of single Motherhood. Therapy would have helped Rory immensely.

[@claudiel4660]

I love Lorelai and Rory's relationship, but ultimately, Lorelai is the parent and in her fear of putting too much on Rory and being like her own parents, she goes the other way entirely and behaves more like a friend. Rory has no reason to act out because she's given the freedom to more or less do as she wants as Lorelai believes she'll do whatever is best. She's not given the chance to rebel against things because - especially in earlier seasons - she's too busy trying to help her mother deal with her life or she's just quietly and independently getting on with her own life without Lorelai having much input. As such, this idea of being a failure is so hard for her to deal with because she's not used to doing anything wrong. She's The 'Perfect' Kid. She tries hard. She does her work. She goes out with the good guy. She takes care of things. She is her mothers emotional support from a young age. Her mother is the one who supposedly screwed it all up and now Rory will have it better. But then things start to go wrong when she starts wanting different things to what's expected of her and instead of this being safely explored while she was a child where her mother COULD step in, it's happening as an adult where there are real consequences (or would be, if not for her grandparents). It's why she sounds like a 14/15 year old at 20, she hasn't had the chance to overcome this boundary. I think you see some of it when Lorelai tries to drop her off at college but Rory doesn't want her to go. This is where she gets lost for me - it's the moment she's left around a lot of people who are very different to her and she begins to assimilate and emulate them, because she hasn't had the emotional growth and maturity to come into herself yet. She doesn't know how to fail and pick herself up, because she's spent her whole life trying not to fail because she wanted to be there for her mother and not make things harder for her. Things have to go to Plan and when they don't, she can't handle it because it's a failure. Rory needed a safe space to be a teenager and screw up in, then go through the consequences and grow from it. But Lorelai is young herself, and doesn't push consequences till the arrest and by then, Rory's an adult. All of this has grown out of Lorelai not wanting to alienate her child as she felt alienated, and Richard and Emily making allowances for Rory out of fear of losing her as they once did Lorelai. They throw their money and privilege at the problem, thinking it'll help when it ends up hurting. It's everyone trying to do their best not to make a mistake and then when they do, not owning it and moving on from it. Rory's decline is awful, but it's also heavily influenced by the things that happened before she was even born. What bothers me about her is that even when Rory works at the DAR, she's an incredibly hard worker, she's driven, she's personable, she has so much potential if she could only find it in herself to move past her need to cling to the view of herself as someone who has to do the right thing all the time. That fear makes her arrogant, because she can't acknowledge her mistakes: not unlike Lorelai or her grandparents. The cycle should have been broken by Rory and instead, she just became part of it and history repeats itself.

[@rubyadelaideofficial]

Spot on!

[@MahathiG]

Perfectly articulated. Beautiful analysis.

[@Shtplm2313]

It was always intended for the story to calm in full Circle . All women in this family succeeded in not taking responsibility of their actions

[@elsys7546]

Well said!

[@Trible_F]

For me its for sure this scene: "Rory wouldn't lie, right?" "No. Rory wouldn't lie" (Fading out with Rory talking with Jess in Luke's while Dean and Lorelai talked outside and looked at them) This scene gets me everytime. The good people believing in Rory while she is silently falling in love with Jess and not knowing how to alc who to talk to what to say and what to do. Also of course this whole Lorelai tells her to not tell Dean when she is doing something that couldt hurt him really bad adds to that. But standing there hearing how Dean and Lorelai put their trust in her as she was always the perfect girl always makes me sad knowing what will come in the next 5 seasons. But also when i watched it the first time i knew there was something wrong and bitter in this scene and that it would probably go down soon.

[@khadijah830]

same it was this scene for me also. season 2 ep 13 i think

[@advogadocannabico]

The thing about Rory's downfall is that it mainly happens because the people in her life always prevents her from facing the consequences for her actions, so she grew up without not knowing How to cope with failure and dealing with "no" from life

[@fabriziotepedino1605]

I like Rory's character. Not all characters must be likeable, Rory was really really flawed and that's okay. The idea of going down this spiral of bad decisions was to show how her mother and her are almost the same person, and it was done to put Lorelai in the place where her mother was when she left her home pregnant. This way Lorelai got to see how Emily felt all those years ago.

[@Jemy6733]

I never thought of this. This makes so much sense

[@rae7129]

I agree that not all main characters have to be likable. But I disagree that the series was about how Rory and Lorelei were almost the same person. I just realized this from my current rewatch that Rory told Dean (I think in S01 EP01) that maybe she was not the nice person that Dean thought she was. That, in fact, she was a selfish person. And that was like a foreshadowing of what she would be in her later life--a self-centered individual who does not know how to face difficulties in her life. And maybe her emotional issues stemmed from people around her coddling her (which is definitely not how Lorelei was raised), but whatever happened in her life in college, the twenties, and thirties were her choices alone. Not her mother's, nor inspired by her mother's.

[@ananyagupta3917]

I dont think they are similar people at all. They do not lead similar lives. Rory has her mothers support throughout her life. Lorelai is there for her no questions asked (which is a whole other problem). Emily never made an effort to understand her daughter who felt trapped and ran away because of it. Rory never faces such a dilemma in her life where reponsibility and financial instability are thrust upon her all of a sudden. Lorelai's struggles are huge in comparison to Rori's issues.

[@fabriziotepedino1605]

@@ananyagupta3917 yeah maybe saying they are the same person is too much, you're right. But there are a lot a lot of parallelism around them two. I wasn't trying to say, their lifes were the same, but instead that they were more alike than initially presented. The differences in their upbringings are there, but their sometimes erratic behaviour seems to be a Gilmore thing. And I think it draws a line that connect three generations of gilmore girls.

[@ananyagupta3917]

@@fabriziotepedino1605 that is a very fair assessment! I agree that its definitely a Gilmore trait to be erratic. Emily tried to time share a plane after all and is very passive aggressive on many ocassions.

[@prettynerd4779]

Its not just Lorelei, its EVERYONE especially Emily and Richards money! Rory would have never had an easy time of it as she did if she did not utilize the benefits or priveledge of being the grandchild of Connecticut's Elite. Richard and Emily gave Rory access and she reveled in it! Honestly, Rory started changing in episode 2 when she put on that Tiger Woods hat Emily got her and started using words like "quite". Rory pretended to not care but she so obviously ADORED the World her grandparents brought her into and has been walking towards that priveledged life since season 1. Lorelei, was too busy trying to be Rory's friend and the entire town paid homage to the Gilmore girls every 3rd episode with Rory literally getting a huge going away party in pouring rain because she got a job. WTF... lol.. What is funny is Rory was actually good at being an upper class society darling and would have done Emily proud.. she never really liked to work too hard, she loved to make fun of other people using her intellect and wit, and although she did study hard, everything else was given to her because her family name and her pretty east coast debutante looks. Remember when Rory still attended a party even though she had a BOYFRIEND ( DEAN) with Yale Bachelors.. she should have left as soon as she figured what her grandparents were doing.. she WANTED to be there.. she acted like she was so innocent but yeah she wasnt.. then Dean finds her with a bunch of rich, handsome guys after he threw away his whole marriage for her! She stopped liking Dean after Logan basically took her to a Gatsby party in the woods and Dean gave her some potato chips and was too busy to read her article because he was working.. I still love her but she is also the worse... Rory loved the Hamptons jet set life and Logan was literally the icing on the cake!! I am not sure why she turned down his proposal.. they were weirdly perfect for each other.. Jess deserved better.. Blair from gossip girl was totally right when she said she deserved to go to Yale way more than that Rory!

[@grrnadi8029]

agreeing with everything except for the loving her part lmaoooooo

[@jaspyheart1430]

to be fair the going way party in the rain wasn't just because she got a job, they were supposed to do a reenactment of her graduation because several people from stars hollow weren't allowed to go to the actual one, but when Rory got the job she had to leave so soon that it turned into a going away party instead.

[@TheMarkmcr]

Rory may have felt more at home in high society, but her personality is closer to that of a business person than a socialite wife. A marriage to logan would take that away from her

[@prettynerd4779]

@@TheMarkmcr Lets agree to disagree, Rory would have been a great news anchor or running her own publishing house but she would still be married to some high profile man. She was just as Mitchum said so I think she would have done well as a society wife and have her own career. Logan never asked her to stop working.

[@TheMarkmcr]

@@prettynerd4779 it's not about what logan thinks. If rory attempted to balance being a society wife with her own career plans, she wouldn't have gotten the acceptance she craves because the mere idea of a working woman was looked down upon. She tried proving herself to shira and ended up being unhappy. Her own family was more open to her desires

[@vinnie6793]

The moment Rory graduated from high school was the most rapid character decline I have ever seen. Sure she can be a realistic character, but when you compare it to the whole towns praising of her, as if she’s a literal GOD for any achievement, her flaws stand out A LOT more. She cheated, she forced others to cheat, she lied over topics that I wouldn’t even dream of lying about. Everyone had high expectations of her, and she had a burnout, in the Netflix 4 part sequel, you see she didn’t live up to her childhood prodigy glory, and suffered from this because she was never taught that things don’t just come to you, at least when it comes to having a job or romantic interest, and she really lingered in a relationship with one poor guy and FORGOT that he existed, a perfectly fine nice guy. Of course you wouldn’t expect the blind eye of Rory because of her mothers position of a single mom, so it leaves me wondering if her mom ever even taught her of the topic. Literally a WHOLE TOWN, sure a small one, but still big enough, loved her more than they might’ve loved their own kids, which of whom we never even saw because again, she was treated as a God.

[@diana-qf5dw]

It was everyone round her. The whole town idolized Rory (and to an extent Lorelai too) One of the biggest signs of this was when everyone thought Dean dumped Rory for no reason. Rory never mentioned what caused Dean to break up with her, she just let everyone think he did it out of the blue and broke her heart so carelessly when he was more heartbroken when she didn’t tell him she loved him (Dean was immature for that yes). They didn’t know the whole story, the didn’t NEED to be so involved in some teenagers’ love life, and they were so quick to villainize Dean. It’s honestly a lot of unhealthy behavior from adults towards kids. This only got worse over time tbh.

[@leahyy93]

For me, her downfall became solidified in the season 5 episode where her and Dean break up again, when Emily and Richard threw her that party to meet all the boys from Yale. She had a boyfriend, a normal person would’ve told them that their setup was ridiculous and left. However she stayed because she loved getting dressed up in a tiara and expensive jewelry, and all the attention she was getting from the men to the point that she lost track of time and left Dean outside waiting. When she finally went to meet him she had a trail of guys behind her and was being all giggly, she humiliated him. Then when he left, she let out a few sniffles but then quickly went back to partying with the guys for the rest of the night. When she showed up back at home in the limo, once again giggling with all the guys, you can see lorelai staring at her from inside the window.. in that moment starting to see the permanent changes in her and her fully embracing that life and the entitlement.

[@janeeyflores]

I've learned from the creator of the series --- Amy Sherman-Palladino. She made the decision to leave Rory’s story messy and open-ended because that’s generally how life works. To quote what she said, “Your life should not have a bow on it at 32. Your life should be a wide-open field at 32 years old.” I initially thought it would change in the revival but she never really grew up --- like Lorelai. Lorelai still acted like she was in her early 30s in the revival but what I like about her is that if the situation calls for her to act mature, she becomes one and makes proper decisions. Rory became entitled to having everything and she didn't know how to take rejections well. What I did love about this is that Paris really became successful as she should be --- she has the grit and she takes no for an answer. I personally think Paris would be the journalist --- and not Rory. Which we have seen during their college years --- the editor always found Rory's pitches boring and she didn't really grabbed that opportunity when she was an intern in Mitchum's newspaper company.

[@iwatchytwhenimbored1636]

paris being a successful journalist with a doctorate degree would’ve been such a refreshing thing to see

[@castpearlsbeforeswine9744]

I personally think rory has been slowly getting worse since the beginning. She ignored Lane for Dean when Lane wanted to have a simple teenage crush talk. She kissed Tristan right after he tells her that he loved her then made the town believe he was the villain. She got mad when Dean became insecure of their relationship while she spent her time with Jess who she kissed while they were still in a relationship and ditched her mom's graduation for him then guilt trips Lorelai. She blamed Lindsey for Dean's affair when she was actually a good wife and she's always thinking everyone is against her or has to love her.

[@TheMarkmcr]

We're shown a warning sign of this in the pilot when dean mentions her having no reaction to an accident during lunchtime.

[@LLearner1121]

To think that i thought her as Perfect when growing up ... rewatching in my 30s now makes me cringe so bad 😂 but it is kind of realistic.. she isnt spiritual to begin with..and this show is anything but spiritual

[@Ellistone08]

It's crazy how one moment can have such a dramatic ripple effect. A moment that gets solved in a episode that leads to more and more that changes you dramatically

[@SheYodaApprentice]

No that was actually good advice… Rory wasnt together with Dean when the kiss happened. And I think what Lorelai says here is very true: she would only tell Dean to make herself feel less guilty but by doing so make Dean hurt unnecessarily.

[@evegreenification]

Agree

[@Bella-gg4oz]

I think it still would have been better to know the truth, because what's to say that for a more serious incident she would tell Dean in the future? I mean even after that we go on to see her lie time and time again to Dean with Jess and that prick, Logan

[@elinasaksakulm5725]

@@Bella-gg4oz Normal human being would understand the difference of an exception and not take it as a green light to become a pathological liar/cheater. I would say that`s fully on Rory. In the end, she was old enough to be accountable on all these instances. No one forced her to do anything.

[@morganbishop7146]

i don’t think it was good advice.. bc if i remember correctly doesn’t tristan tell dean about the kiss anyway?? it would’ve been better coming from rory than tristan

[@MackenzieNoelle]

I think it would have been good advice if the situation were between adults that didn’t have to interact, however that wasn’t the case. Tristan was a vengeful unpredictable teen and Rory wouldn’t be able to avoid him because of school. I think Lorelai would have given different advice if she knew that Tristan and Dean would inevitably interact in the near future, or at least I would hope so. I love Lorelai but she is so bad at not communicating things until it blows up in her face

[@StewNWT]

The few times Lorelai called Rory on her BS she threw a huge hissy fit and ran away from any accountability

[@electricbop]

Yes!! The problem wasn’t so much that Rory messed up. The problem was that she never learned from her mistakes. I was supper disappointed in how she turned out as an adult. Her and her mother never seemed to mature. As entertaining as the show was and though I enjoyed the mother/daughter relationship, I never really loved the show or the characters the way I do other shows. Even Eleanor from “the Good Place” annoyed me less and grew as a character more

[@Bella-gg4oz]

How good is the Good Place though? Ohhhhhh, I found the list of books mentioned in the show and they're all on Good Reads if you want to check them out!

[@beta910]

I mean Eleanor’s whole point was that she will ultimately grow as a person. I feel like with Rory (and even Lorelai) they never actually let them grow personality wise, they always fall back to the same patterns of self sabotage (ESPECIALLY Lorelai, the woman has 2 cancelled engagements and commitment issues, which probably rubbed off on Rory) to have more drama or to have the whole Rory is basically Lorelai circle moment that happened in A Year in The Life

[@BEe-hi4my]

Someone needs to do a commentary video entitled: Rory Gilmore and unrecognised emotional labour. Caveat: Rory can be toxic herself, we’ve all expounded at length on that now. But. No one talks about how amazing she can be at supporting the people in her life. Paris is the prime example: she grows so MUCH thanks to Rory’s friendship. Rory shows Paris kindness; teaches her interdependence. Paris wouldn’t have approached her relationships with Jamie and Doyle and she did, with vulnerability, and a measure of trust, and even devotion, without her friendship to Rory. Rory straight up became her bully’s best friend. Personally I don’t think she should have bothered, Paris was horrid. But it turned out well, and it’s thanks to Rory. Rory also offered Jess a connection (which, like Paris did initially, also took for granted). On the other end, Rory is parentified by her mum and made into an extension of Lorelai. Rory’s two biggest challenges are pointed to her by two men in her life long before Mitchum. Headmaster Charleston tells her straight up: you’re not an Amanpour type. Unlike mitchum, he has the decency to tell her who she could be (Cookie roberts i think?). And dean tells her: she basically does nothing and worse, thinks nothing, before checking with Lorelai first. I’m not saying this video did that (it’s actually a fairly open minded take on Rory I think) but the Rory hate is so unnuanced it has to stop.

[@alyzu4755]

One moment that, I believe, foreshadowed her downfall was when she ran to her grandparents ' when she found out about Lorelei and Max. Yes, absolutely, Lorelei should have told her (or... maybe NOT dated her daughter's teacher?), but running off and scaring Lorelei to death wasn't cool.

[@LuckyFarscape]

That episode where Rory is late because of a deer in the road leading her to fail a test and her demand that she be allowed a do over was the beginning her downfall. Lorelai even gets involved talking to her teacher. And she gets what she wants. Rory never developed a healthy coping mechanism for criticism or failure.

[@frankelder1158]

To be fair that was a ridiculous reason to not let her take the test.

[@bluebird1914]

@@frankelder1158 True. If they wanted to make Rory look entitled, it would've made more sense if Rory was late to the test because she decided to go to the store before school and was late, or decided to take ages to do her hair or something.

[@iwatchytwhenimbored1636]

i personally disagree only because i think most people would be pissed if a deer ran into their car causing them to be late and missing an important test that they knew all about. her lashing out at her fellow students and her teacher is definitely a thing a 16 year old girl would do

[@elsys7546]

honestly, i would have my mom talk to the teacher too if i missed the test

[@PolinaTolpygina]

Honestly, I blame Lorelai for the way Rory turned out much more than I blame Rory. In fact, I never even thought there was a downfall of her character; she was a people-pleaser from the very beginning and rarely expressed her point of view on anything. While Paris might have been too straightfoward and even insensitive in that regard, Rory was trying too hard to be 'comfortable' for everybody; and how can you blame a person for that? She was RAISED in such conditions that she was praised when she did well in school, she was praised when she acted modest and quiet, she was praised when she did something not for herself, but for someone else. The Perfect Kid. I was especially upset when Lorelai overheard Paris and Rory's conversation and Paris's first sex and Lorelai got SO HAPPY Rory hadn't had sex yet herself she offered to go buy her new shoes for that. Now that's destructive. She wasn't actually allowed to be whatever she wanted to be at all times; she was always expected to be an angel instead. And when things in her life finally got complicated, I think that it was the actual lack of communication (!) between her and her mom that made her make bad decisions. Aftet years of surpressing her thoughts and feelings in case those were not 'too comfortable' for other people, she started igniting easily and getting mad at people. Fair enough. It's like she was just sick of it at some points and had no healthy idea on how to manage properly. Again, Lorelai's fault for always presenting herself as The Perfect Mother who thought therapy a thing for junkies and real talk unnecessary.

[@gustavoamorim5189]

I agree with you. She is trying to balance people-pleasing in a very unhealthy way.

[@MariaJoseRangelUwU]

I think the story was always about how Rory was an entitled brat all along and her development is realistic. She never experienced any rejection nor failure, and she was told she could do anything, that she was perfect, everyone always wanted to make her happy… she’s literally described as an angel by the entire town. And she acts accordingly, she believes all of that, so when life proves wrong those statements she cracks, can’t deal with any criticism or anything that tells her she’s not perfect. Everyone makes excuses for her, so of course she never believes she did anything wrong, and when someone is hurt or points her behavior out they’re the villain. She was told so much that her destiny was to be perfect and successful at everything that she thought she was entitled to it but when things don’t go her way she throws tantrums, because her whole believe system is shattered, and she never got to mature in that aspect, that’s why her adult life is a mess. She could have self awareness and finally mature and make amendments, but a lot of people don’t, and keep being entitled and spoiled their whole lives. I think Rory is the last one.

[@elsys7546]

Last one what?

[@peterjeffery8495]

A Year In The Life was a brutal letdown to all of us who invested time in the 7 year long series. It was Rory Noir and it was a waste of time. I'll never watch another thing produced or created by the Palladino's.

[@GwampyGow]

You've got some really good insights. I've been watching this series over & over and I haven't even thought about everything you just mentioned. It's nice to know that there are people like me who are so into this show. Thanks for making my day 😊

[@Silverscreenfreak]

Thank you 🥰😀

[@ola-le5th]

I think also seeing her mother cheat on her boyfriends and sleep with her dad when he had a GF was a breaking point for her and why she acted as if its okay to cheat and sleep with a married man

[@erinbraggs9551]

The point where i lost it was when Logan and Rory stole the yacht, and after picking her up, when Rory tried to tell Lorelai that it was her idea, Lorelai IMMEDIATELY tells her its Logan's fault. SHE is ALWAYS blaming other people for critcizing rory, even if it was true. She literally calls Mitchum an asshole for telling her the truth and that pissed me tf off. It's always the boys fault for things going wrong and for ONCE when Rory tries to take accountability she defends her and says "stop trying to protect him". The reason is that she thinks her kid is an ANGEL, when in reality she isn't. Rory doesn't listen or take accountability because of how her mom let her go off so EASILY, and then Lorelai gets mad and upset when rory doesn't listen. Pathetic.

[@katelynwilliamson5666]

This hits for me. When I was a kid, I would watch this show with my Mum (we were the only two girls and it was something we did just for us). When I was a kid, I thought Rory was this awesome person who i wanted to be like because she was witty, expressive, funny, smart- everything I wanted to be like. For a lot of years, I still had this show in rose coloured glasses and thought about it nostalgically. When it came to Netflix and I had some time off Uni, I went down memory lane- but instead of roses, I found a lot of thorns, especially where Rory and Lorelai were concerned. It was really off-putting to realize how AWFUL these characters I loved were as people- and yeah, a good writer doesn't just write about goody-two shoes because that isn't relateable to anyone, but neither Lorelai or Rory make any growth or seem to grasp when they've done something wrong and everyone in their lives still treat them as wonderful darlings. I mean Rory cheats in just about every relationship she has without remorse, she completely loses her mind if anyone criticizes her (like Mitchum and the Professor at Harvard), she never even feels bad for completely trashing the ballerina in the school paper, can never even see how privileged her life became after her grandparents started paying for everything (at least Logan knew and admitted he was an entitled, privileged asshole), and she keeps lying and badmouthing people who try to help her. And Lorelai is no better. When it comes to her parents she still acts like a spoiled 15 year old who thinks she is so hard done by them, and she never moves on from this mentality despite all the times she goes to them for help and they give her the help (I mean they give her hundreds of thousand of dollars for Rory's education and she acts like it's unfair that they actually want to see their daughter/grand-daughter), and then she gets worse in the revival.

[@TheMarkmcr]

Lorelai wasn't anything more than a stubborn wild child

[@VioletEmerald]

Definitely disagree. I think her downfall didn't start till season 4 but the ground of her insecurity was laid in how she couldn't bring herself to break up with Dean even though she wanted to be with Jess, and many other moments. But she didn't actually start to fall as a character till season 4.

[@yohanedescends4683]

S2 with jess and dean wasn't that bad to call it a downfall, obviously cheating is bad but shes a people pleaser and shes scared to hurt people she cares about and dean was known for his temper and lorelai constantly told her how perfect dean was and she was lucky to have him so i think she was afraid to leave someone who everyone deems as perfect for someone the town hated. i agree with S4

[@hagosto1059]

Sounds like she was... Really human. Everyone's hating on her for not being perfect but that's just how people are. It's realistic imo

[@Rosa-bb1hb]

Thissss

[@shboomgirl]

I agree! Except for the reboot, cause I don't think it's realistic she didn't grow at all during the ages 22-30.

[@fiercefullen1554]

It's not so much about being imperfect, its about not learning from your mistakes, even when your mistakes hurt other people.

[@kanacucumber]

@@shboomgirl sounds like my mom

[@villanelle2.0]

Exactly!! The goody goody Rory was unrealistic tbh.

[@moonica5770]

This is why I still love the Gilmore Girls. They are not perfect and this is like people in the real world are.

[@chanelkittenxo]

My personal theory is that Lorelei pushed all her unfulfilled dreams onto Rory. I feel like it was Lorelei’s dream for Rory to attend an Ivy League school and felt like Rory owed her in a sense for the sacrifices she had made. While Rory was smart & a good student, I think the pressure became too much and rebelled in a similar way that Lorelei did when she was a teenager. I think she was tired of living someone else’s dream and went in a completely opposite direction.

[@ravenRedwake]

4:54 this is a case study as to why single parent households suck. I’ve experienced both sides of it, and it fucking sucks both ways and I have had a lot of issues and subscriptions and interpersonal problems in my life, it has led to me not wanting kids, and avoiding dating (though that’s sort of a national trend among straight men). I thought I’d be dead by 25, and now I’m 40. I’m treading ground, and about the only thing keeping me from killing myself is I’m sardonically waiting to see if the US has another Civil War so I can round out my bingo card.

[@BW022]

Well, obviously this is a TV show and Rory's downfall was the writers/producers trying to add drama to a show which really didn't have much. If we look at the start of the show, Rory is sixteen and pretty much the perfect kid -- self-aware, sweet, caring to others, focused, responsible, etc. Three years later, at nineteen, she's pretty much to polar opposite. In real life, the never happens baring an obvious factor -- abuse, drugs, mental illness, etc. Most children by 16 are pretty set in their morals, values, behaviors, etc. So, asking the question becomes kind of pointless as either: (a) She always had a deep issue which the show never showed us, or (b) she did a 180 for some minor reason. If (a), then we have to question all of Lorelai's parenting... her choice to raise Rory as a single-mom, not marrying her father, not having a strong male figure, being a friend instead of a parent, etc., etc. And we also have to question why this failing wasn't apparent at 16. If (b), reasons given a so minor it isn't worth it. Again, most 16-year-olds are pretty set. She isn't going to do a 180 just because her parents have money -- they simply don't have enough time to make her spoiled if she grew up for 16 years with a teen single mom working at an inn. I'm happy with my answer -- the writes/producers are responsible for Rory's downfall. Anything else doesn't make sense -- which is why it was grating and disappointing.

[@pepperVenge]

Personally, I like Rory's character flaws. They make her more real and human then a lot of other TV characters. Rory didn't go out and take over the world like she was made out to do in the early stages of the show. Nope, when she went out into the world, she just fell flat on her face time and time again. Just like most of us do. Even with all her help and privilege, she still manages to fail. That makes her one of the best characters in TV history in my opinion.

[@erzsebetpetnehazi9348]

I don't think that it is Rory's obligation to stay at Yale because of Lorelai's dreams. I used to think that it was great that Lorelai motivated Rory to go to an Ivy League school, but now I feel that it was more about Lorelai wanting to achieve her own goals through Rory, which is understandable, but also very sad. Lorelai might seem confident, but after her daughter decides to leave Yale, she says that Rory was supposed to be more than her and she was supposed to have everything. So Lorelai has this inferiority complex, even after opening her own inn, because she couldn't go to a "real" college and she wants it so badly, that she refuses to see that Rory is not cut out to be a famous and influential journalist, simply because of her personality. This doesn't mean that she wouldn't make it at all, but aiming for the most prestigious papers and nothing else clearly wasn't a good idea. Not to mention, that attending college does not mean that you will be successful in the future at all, but believing that it magically sorts your life out has led to depression for many people in Rory's generation, so the portrayal of that process is very accurate in the show.

[@midnight_tacos]

Finally someone said it 👏👏👏

[@raindawnson9254]

Imo Rory's downfall happened before the show even started because of the insane amount of pressure that Lorelai unintentionally put on Rory for being an angel who 'raised herself' I'm sure in her mind it was a compliment to Rory (possibly even saying it bc it's her way of showing love since her own parents treated her the opposite way). I think this only gets amplified when Rory ends up transferring to Chilton bc she sees what a huge sacrifice it is for Lorelai to make; she absolutely cannot let her down. The final nail I would agree is when Lorelai essentially gives her permission to lie to Dean because it teaches Rory that her top priority is to maintain her reputation, even if that means lying to do so. Rory was never taught how to properly live with and learn from the mistakes she makes which leads her to constantly play the victim or micromanage other people's emotions (she does it with Dean a lot, always telling him don't be mad and such, she doesn't give him space to feel things emotionally which just makes him have a bigger emotional reaction). This may be me forgetting parts of the show but I wish there was some sort of confrontation between young Rory and Lorelai where Rory expresses that she feels the pressure that she does (or honestly even better would be a conversation between Rory and Lane about how each of their mother's restrict them so much in very different ways). Also side note that's unrelated but I want to get it off my chest: I'm so utterly upset with how they threw away Dean's personality and character and reduced him the way that they did when he came back onto the show. He should've gone to university like he wanted to, there was really no reason to have him marry so young and so soon other than they wanted drama for the show. Which is honestly my biggest gripe with the show because they literally did this to Lane, Paris and her friends, Marty, and others I'm probably forgetting where they just get rid of so much of the complexity they had, especially Paris I hated how they reduced her to a gimmick when they went to Yale,

[@jonny-b4954]

Simple fact is you can't be your daughter/sons best friend. YOU HAVE TO PARENT. You have to be the parent. Otherwise, this is the kind of kid you get once they grow up. Selfish, entitled, thinks they're god's gift on this green Earth and can do no wrong etc.

[@xoxo.amanda09]

i dont think rory ever had a “downfall” i think she was always like that, all that was always there, its just when things got “hard” that it came out

[@lawrencewestby9229]

Mitchum was right when he said, "You don't got it."

[@MariAnKenobi]

Her decline began in episode 1, when she got into Chilton. She was already messed up from having a narcissistic, immature, single mother who indulged her and kept telling her how perfect she was, and leaned on her for emotional support rather than BEING her emotional support. If she'd finished high public school at the top of her class, gone to community college by working for the money at Luke's diner or another local business, and gotten a down-to-earth job like CNA, bookkeeper, or even stylist, she'd have gotten over herself and found some empathy for others. But she had everything handed to her so often that she felt she deserved it, even if she hadn't earned it. She was a terrible person, but got away with it because she was cute and her grandparents had money, meaning she had money, even if her mother was a "self-made woman," who really had lots of help and support from her community. Lorelei should have married Luke a lot sooner. Like, within a year of meeting him. He was down-to-earth enough that he could have mellowed her out, and could have been a dad to a young Rory, who would have benefited from that stability.

[@cassandratemple45]

I'd say not showing up to her mom's graduation was a big one too, but for me Rory wasn't truly unredeemable until Year in the Life. When I was watching it I breathed a sigh of relief when she took over the Stars Hollow Gazette and seemed to be settling down there. I wanted her to pause and reflect and realize that she had all the love and fulfillment she could ever need right there. Maybe she'd even meet one of the townies she was making fun of and be happy with him. When that really REALLY didn't happen I ceased caring about her entirely.

[@laurasosnow7507]

Same here. I thought her time at the Stars Hollow Gazette wouldn't be forever, but an important time to reflect before jetting off to another big adventure. What happened to the young woman who got her own self the job on the Barack Obama campaign? It was a perfect set-up: ambitious enough for Rory but grueling, low pay, traveling constantly. The perfect first job in a way.

[@NeverlandSystemKitten]

I really didn't like most of "A year in the life" (Emily's arc was the best hands down) and I LOVE the show. As for your take, nailed it. If there has to be "one moment"... this is a GREAT point to look to.

[@mannaporanna2678]

I liked Emily in A year in the life too.👍

[@RolleDA]

The whole Dean Situation taught her how to play her mother against her grandmother. She plays everybody like an evil mastermind since then.

[@evegreenification]

I think the "this is my study tree" is a perfect example of what was wrong with Rory. Way too old to figure you're that cute and important. If I'd said that crap to someone at age 5 I would have been scolded. That's what you get when you have a character who is literally cheered for by an entire town.

[@joanclayton5212]

Rory grew up dirt poor. She grew up in a shed raised by her unwed teenaged mother with an absentee father. The kids at her school didn’t like her and they didn’t like her at chilton either. People only accepted her because she could calm down Paris. So of course, she embraced the life of privilege and money once she had the opportunity.

[@sophietessier8998]

I actually like Rorry getting bad, at least until the Revival. It's feel logical and an natural evolution of her life style and her mother relationship. Just like Carrie Bradshaw both are entitle and self center, but they are intresting and realistic. ( And i kinda see indentify with them because i also am entitle to my parents and talk a lot about myself or only think of my interst. They help me notice it and grow from it, If every character were nice and perfect tv would be so boring)

[@Brandon-uq4mt]

I think the problem is Lorelei treats Rory like a friend and not a parent. It doesn't help that pretty much everyone treats Rory like the second coming of Jesus.

[@blaecaster1697]

I think it started when she disregarded Dean's feelings to be with Jess and no one truly called her out

[@cche16]

her downfall began as soon as she became an adult. everyone still treated her like royalty and that she could do no wrong which fuelled her entitlement and caused her to lash out because she was old enough to fight back against the adults. her nasty behaviour grew during her college years beyond redemption.

[@BookofLetters]

I think you make a really cool point. Because while it's realistic for a person to simply change as they age, in story telling it's important for decisions to signify change and how she WANTS to tell Dean but then her best friend talks her out of it (then she faces no consequences so we see the character learn that lying and getting away with stuff) would be really good long term story telling.

[@Bella-gg4oz]

I watched Gilmore Girls when I was younger and overlooked/didn't observe a lot of these things as problematic. Some months back I decided to rewatch it and I saw videos talking about her downfall and privilege. It is from these same videos that I realised that a lot of her behaviours weren't acceptable, but that everyone in the show gave her a free pass.

[@suzannezaccour8373]

Her boyfriend was so jealous, controlling and prone to anger outbursts that she was afraid to tell him about a kiss that happened when they were not even together. She's not the one to blame there.

[@VioletEmerald]

I agree.

[@shboomgirl]

100%

[@alyzu4755]

Also, everyone (including Dean) says she broke up with Dean, but he broke up with her, twice. Very publicly. Yes, she treated him badly once Jess came on the scene, but she's not the one who broke up with him.

[@david7996]

I always felt like they completely changed Dean's character at some point toward the end of season 1/beginning of season 2. Him being so controlling kinda came out of nowhere

[@Je551kuhhh]

👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽

[@chelzlor3200]

I do think this is an interesting take on where Rory declined. However - she chose to take what her mom said and use it to feel entitled. Sorry, but I think Loreli was correct in how she explained the Tristan situation to Rory. Rory felt guilty; she wanted to get rid of her guilt. To do that, she thought she needed to tell Dean, and then she would feel better only then doing what you said she had done all along. - hurt those that care about her. All that guilt would have passed on to Dean, not in a way he would feel guilty, but that he would feel awful. Then she would feel better and justified that she had done the right thing in her head without acknowledging what she had done. Loreli giving her advice isn't what made her avoid consequences; she would have felt justified either way.

[@Silverscreenfreak]

That’s an interesting point, and I agree it really does look like everything rory does is for herself and her own conscience

[@rainy905]

@@Silverscreenfreak There’s alos the fact that the town seems to blindly admire her and gives her praise for doing the bareminulim.

[@victoria139]

Idk I mean on the one hand I think if she told Dean and he dumped her that would've been a major consequence I mean she was 16 getting dumped is a huge thing, but based on later with their break up I think it only would've helped her character if everyone knew what she did wrong. Like everyone thought Dean was the villain because he hadn't defended himself and I think that would've been a similar situation

[@snoozyq9576]

nah that's dumb. people deserve to know the truth

[@ishitamisra1833]

i was watching gilmore girls again yesterday and i do agree with you analogy, her lack of accountability caused her decline, and i feel that the very moment it all started was when jess crashed the car and we saw the whole town babying her even though she asked jess to keep driving while being in a relationship with dean, she wanted accountability for the incident but it was a harbringer of what exactky caused her downfall

[@clairegamble3918]

I think it’s her first bad grade at a Chilton which is only like 3 episodes in. She nearly quits the school because of one bad mark and you can see that lorelai is disappointed in her lack of resilience. It’s the same with every problem she hits. Everyone keeps saying “Rory is different. Rory is special. She’s the sweetest kid. She wouldn’t lie”.

[@lucyleocreative]

I know it probably started a bit before this but it sucked that just as Luke and Lorelai got together - which I, like imagine pretty much everyone watching the show, had been waiting for several seasons - she had the affair with Dean, like literally the same night, which took the shine off that moment. And then what was supposed to be a happy time of Luke and Lorelai starting dating was clouded by Rory and Lorelai falling out and not speaking to each other. It's a shame bc Luke was such a father figure to her and it would have been so nice to see the three of them as a family dynamic in that particular, exciting moment in time when everything was just starting to fall in place.

[@T_Cup]

Your points are very well reasoned, but imo there’s no definitive downfall moment. Sure, going by the details you provided, we can see why she became more comfortable with lying. But nothing explains why she started doing so many things that required her to lie. Fans always write off her sense of entitlement as realistic, but she was raised by Lorelei in Stars Hollow her whole life, so being entitled should’ve already been part of her character from the beginning. Clearly not the case. And even after meeting her grandparents, the only major change that occurred was that she switched her mother’s dream for her grandparents’ dream, an identical dream she worked hard to achieve. Her sudden change was neither realistic nor organic imo. ASP stated that she wanted Rory to become Lorelei over time, so Rory randomly started doing things that Lorelei would do or had done, particularly in her relationships, even though they were out of her character. So it wasn’t that Rory changed, ASP just didn’t let her be herself. This is clear via how all her love interests mirrored Lorelei’s: Jess = Luke, Logan/Tristan = Christopher and Dean = Max. Her movement away Dean towards Jess was the catalyst that set her on the path to becoming Lorelei 2.0, but it never fully made sense, nor did the behaviour that followed. And because she had no baby to add self-less single mother to her narrative, she comes off looking and doing worse than Lorelei did.

[@laurasosnow7507]

Agreed! It almost felt like ASP was punishing the audience.

[@MaryamQQQ]

I ain’t readin all that can someone like recap

[@T_Cup]

@MaryamQQQ Basically I just wrote that I believe she could've had a downfall given the circumstances, but how it happened didn't feel believable to her character

[@leticiavieira4646]

My theory: Her fall down started with she stop being freaking honest and with a great sense of ethics. BUT she hid from Dean she kissed Tristen the day after they broke up... so she started to hide too the Jess friendship, and she kiss Jess apparently with noooooo regrets Than dean and Lindsay She cross the line of ethics and kept going Blind with all the red flags Logans had too

[@jamie6358]

I have to say even though I think Rory definitely has her flaws I think that people exaggerate her downfall. Are we gonna forget how Lorelei had a downfall too? She would steal her parents liquor at 15 with her boyfriend and literally got pregnant. Of course Rory made mistakes and it made us angry to watch but maybe the real reason it made us angry was because it’s realistic and it reminds us of ourselves and how we aren’t perfect either. The reason the producers created Rory’s downfall was actually because they felt her character was too perfect. Rory is a perfect example of what it’s like to be human and I think people spend way too much time hating on her character instead of focusing on how it’s realistic

[@bubbybets9336]

no, rorys just a narcissist. she is not a realistic image of ourselves

[@A.Vagrant]

yes, everyone is like this, but that's the real tragedy. normal is toxic. human beings on the whole could do better.

[@beta910]

See but I feel like all the pre-season 5 bad Rory stuff was normal, and something every person would do. It hits a whole different ceiling of flawed when they make her cheat with Dean, knowing he is married, and knowing, personally, who his wife is (since they grew in a small town). The actress herself was shocked with that choice and even disliked Rory a bit after that. Then it just heightens to even worse heights when she quits college on a whim and ignores her mom, and if I remember correctly tries to steal a boat? And then as a viewer you’re like…okay this is bad but maybe they’ll salvage this in AYITL with the original writers, but nope, Rory is somehow still stagnant personality wise and is still not remorseful about cheating when she knows Logan is engaged to someone else. It just boggles my mind how they wanted to just introduce a flawed burnt out character moment for Rory and turned her into such an unempathetic human being….I will say though, she’s a little realistic cause there are definitely ppl out there with her audacity level.

[@scl97]

I somewhat agree. Rory wasn’t dating Dean at that time so it really didn’t matter if she kissed Tristan or not. I think Rory started sucking in Season 2 when she had a picnic with Jess even though it would clearly hurt Dean. Then she claimed that she did it for the sake of town tradition. Girl bye! Then they try to make the audience sympathize with her foolery. Honestly, Rory’s best boyfriend was Logan because he told her about herself. Dean was creepily obsessed with Rory and couldn’t tell her she was wrong. Jess had soooo many problems in his own life and shouldn’t have had a girlfriend. He treated Rory like garbage when they were dating. Logan was the only person to tell Rory that she’s not as special as she thought she was. 👏 👏Well done Logan!

[@maezin1386]

Thank god another person who thought Logan was the best one. Logan was fun, adventurous, honest, and supportive. He stood up to his father too. He also worked hard on himself to be the best boyfriend he could be for Rory. When he slipped into immaturity Rory was able to call him on it and he immediately went to work on self development. Rory was a terrible journalist and clearly that wasn’t her true calling, however she was an awesome event planner and Logan supported that and they had fun together planning that USO party. I wish she would’ve turned that talent into a business.

[@scl97]

@@maezin1386 You’re so right! She could’ve been great in business. Maybe she would run an awesome company like her grandfather.

[@carinaovergaard985]

I think Jess was good but he needs time to work on himself

[@sararobles8655]

One of the early signs of Rory´s downfall is when she's late to take an exam in Chillton. The way she reacts and starts yelling and interrupting the other students, she really thinks she deserves an exception. And then when Lorelei comes, she thinks the same! and is angry at the Headmaster and Max who are doing their job (and giving a good example to Rory). Also when Dean breaks up with her the 1st time, ALL Stars Hollow´s "protect" her and say awful things about him. She's just spoiled, all people in Town are constantly telling her how great she is.

[@kizzie5949]

They were doing their job, but I don't see how not letting someone take a test because they're a few minutes late, is setting a good example. They say it's to 'prepare kids for the real world', but the real world doesn't work like that. You aren't going to lose your job or be sent home for the day because you were a few minutes late. But I agree she reacted ridiculously

[@TheMarkmcr]

@@kizzie5949 actually, the possibility of losing your job over that isn't unrealistic at all.

[@kizzie5949]

@@TheMarkmcr it's not outside of the realm of possibility, no, but it's not common either. Most jobs will understand that A. Every clock is different (so most employers give a 5-7 minute leeway to cover that) and B. Shit happens in life that is completely out of people's control. *Usually* as long as you don't make being late a habit, it's not a fire worthy offense. Certainly not the very first time (which that was for Rory).

[@TheMarkmcr]

@@kizzie5949 I don't know about that. There's been a seemingly endless amount of stories about controlling managers in the last year

[@kizzie5949]

@@TheMarkmcr ahh, and see I don't know about that myself as I haven't heard those stories personally; however I definitely don't doubt them, as I've had my share of shitty managers. My main point was, I just don't think it's a common enough occurrence that schools need to prepare students for it by refusing to let them take a test (that's a huge part of their grade). I mean isn't the whole reason they're in school, to learn?

[@graycreel]

i feel like everything really started going downhill when she slept with dean. after that, she and lorelai argued CONSTANTLY.

[@annabellassai9818]

i think that rorys true downfall comes from when Jess is introduced and she becomes interested. almost all of rorys worst decisions are because she's boy crazy which is normal for a teenage girl but these bad habits she falls into because of it, never leave her when she becomes an adult. loralie keeping her love life more private from rory for a long time maybe wasn't a good thing. maybe rory needed an example of how to act in relationships because she clearly doesn't know how to act

[@daijaarie]

Moving to Chilton and being introduced to a way different lifestyle than raised and loving the lifestyle is where her downfall started.

[@Silverscreenfreak]

true

[@drashtishukla9499]

i get that rory's love life was a turmoil and that affected her academic skills. but here instead of judging her downfall or blaming her mother or one of her boyfriends for the loss of grace, shouldn't we accept the fact that this happens in reality? i can vouch for Rory because i relate to her. sure i found her actions annoying at times but that's what humans are - annoying sometimes! they make mistakes, sometimes even big ones. i relate to Rory because just like her i used to be the most brilliant student at school, participating in competitions, winning scholarships. but in tenth grade everything started going downhill. i started facing minor setbacks. heck i was so entitled to being a topper that when a teacher or a parent scolded me i used to cry!! i face setbacks and stay depressed and embarrassed about it. one minor inconvenience when things don't go my way and bam! it's like the end of the world. so in conclusion after watching the entire show, i loved Rory because that character is just like me!

[@jayci1]

i love reading these paragraphs at the comment section

[@workoncruiseship]

Although I don't believe you can really pinpoint an exact moment when it happened, I think you hit the nail on the head. No accountability and no true consequences will (most of the time) result in a downward spiral. I too, have watched the series from beginning to end multiple times (watched it first on Netflix back in 2018). Now I'm gonna go back once again to try and really analyze the show; it's just too entertaining to concentrate on the "work" lol.

[@Bella-gg4oz]

Work?

[@workoncruiseship]

@@Bella-gg4oz Haha yeah, the work of analyzing the show instead of strictly watching for entertainment purposes.

[@workoncruiseship]

Ok, as I started to go back and watch the series from the beginning, I believe I found an earlier time of when Rory began to show signs of selfishness: In Season 1, she gets into a fight with her mother (after her and Dean were already broken up)- she runs off to her grandmother's house. Not only does she completely bail on Lane but she never bothers to tell her mother where she went; already knowing how terrified Lorelei was when her and Dean fell asleep at Ms. Patti's and didn't know where she was. I get it, she was upset about the breakup but to go as far as that (bailing on Lane, too- her one and only true friend), is awful. Yes, even for an emotional 16 year old who recently broke up with her first love. Rory only cared about Rory; and it just continued to get worse as time went on. Again, because no one pushed back on her for her actions to hold her accountable and they forgave her too quickly.

[@tiffanymorrison5554]

ok so when rory was a teen/early 20s it was forgivable bc tbh were all rly dumb at that age but the fact that she still is like that when shes like 30 makes her the worst character in my opinon

[@odieb7157]

I think her whole problem started when Lorelai asked her parents to pay for Chilton for Rory. You have to realize that Rory grew up in the poverty her mother chose to put herself, and therefore her daughter in, to get away from her rich family. Rory has had to settle for what her mother could afford for her, and what those around her basically were willing to hand down to them. So she worked hard to get as closer to her dream based on what she believed was their income level. Once Lorelai brought her rich parents into the equation, Rorys belief that she HAD to work hard in everything she did, like Paris, to get into Harvard was thrown out the window. It has now become easier to get ahead, sure she still has to work hard, but some hard parts of her life have become easy to solve with money. At this point, she is no longer the only daughter of a single working mother, but an heiress, the only granddaughter of the Gilmore family. At some point, Rory no longer identifies herself as Lorelais studious daughter, but instead she becomes a Gilmore, as is most blatantly seen in the episode "But I'm a Gilmore". Lorelai on the other hand grew up learning that while money gives you better and easier opportunities, it also comes with strings attached in the form of family traditions and obligations, which prompted her to run away after she got pregnant in the first place. Even when Rory is introduced to these aspects of their wealthy family, she too runs away from it. Unfortunately, she does not gain Lorelais perspective to work harder,and improve herself to gain independence but instead because she has been accustomed to her doting grandparents, she knows that as their only granddaughter she is their only heir, and therefore remains dependent on the fact that she is and always will be a Gilmore. Funny thing is that in the later part of her life she starts to become like her half sister Gigi who she thought was a spoiled brat.

[@odieb7157]

I also noticed that no one discusses what Christophers financial downs to ups had on Rory. Lets be honest, comparing her experiences with her poor dad to gigi with her rich dad probably made her uncomfortable if not mad. This again brings up a kind of flag in Rorys upbringing since Christophers better life came from inheriting his dads money, something Rory probably took into account for her future. The Rory we meet in the revival is a Rory who knows she will inherit a lot of money, from both sides of the family, in the far future. So her efforts at working and improving herself are superficial at best.

[@vellichor7676]

By the end of it all -- having seen the entire series and the Netflix special -- I found that I did not like Rory as a person. It was a step beyond "everyone makes mistakes" territory; she displayed repeatedly a lack of morality in many situations, among the most notably cheating on her boyfriend of years, Paul, with Logan, who himself was engaged to someone else. What's worse, she never seems to acknowledge that was she did was wrong. Realistically written, oh yes; I know many girls like her, semi-hedonists who believe they're the main character in everyone else's story, too. Realistic, but also not desirable to be around. In a real life setting, I'd have deleted her number, blocked her on the socials, and not looked back.

[@TheMarkmcr]

She's psychotic

[@sarailele]

I honestly think that lorelay is one of the most classist character on the show as well as her daughter. She claims to want to run away from the word that emily and richard forced upon her but takes rory to a private school implaying that a public school would not be enough to get in a good college... there's just too many contradictions

[@Unkn0wn-x786]

Honestly, I'd put the downfall moment when she kissed Jess even tho she was with Dean. If she would have broken up with Dean before it would've been a lot better because even tho Dean was trying his best things weren't working out, and she wasn't attracted to him anymore. That was the right moment to end things and then getting with Jess should've been a better process through which they connected and grew to adore each other. Everything until then was fixable. Then she kept making mistakes, eventually leading to the current Rory.

[@GayleenFroese]

I grew up as a gifted kid and went to school with other gifted kids--many of whom were a damned sight smarter than me--and, having spent so much time around those brilliant people, I've always felt that Rory was never that smart. She's a little brighter than average. She does well in an insular environment with a lot of training wheels because it's clear what and who she's meant to be. She devours books, as she's been taught to do and praised for since birth, but she never shows the kind of insight or broadened understanding of human nature that you'd see in a kid who read and _understood_ books. And you never see her reading everything on one topic in the town's library, from children's books to doctoral theses, because she has to know everything about flamingos or how microwaves work. You don't see her hauling around a mix of Great American Novels and Sweet Valley High books, not caring about reading levels but just diving into whatever catches her eye. When I was ten, I went from 1984 to Gordon Korman to Flowers for Algernon to Judy Blume and my classmates were largely the same. We read everything--not just things off some approved list of classics and Important Books--and we chased interests doggedly. Our inner lives were huge. Rory's inner emptiness and lack of brilliance--not just immaturity--is what Mitchum Huntzberger sees in her. He's the first person with the perspective to see her for who she is, not who her mother and grandparents and adoptive town declared her to be. If she'd been treated like a normal kid--not overpraised, allowed to be ordinary without that being an indictment of her mother (and later her grandparents)--she would probably have done fine. But so many people needed her to be exceptional, for their own reasons, and she never was.

[@Vohalika]

Yeah, you can absolutely tell that Rory was written by people who don't actually know what real gifted kids are like. Rory had little creativity, and even less curiosity, and she was only ever allowed to be Hollywood nerdy, but never too weird. She was booksmart and studious, but she asbolutely lacked insight and critical thinking beyond what a study guide may give you, and never seemed to really care to want anything more than that. I'd put that squarely on the limitations of the writers.

[@guybrushthreepwood4174]

@@Vohalika the writers know these things better than you, they invented this character exactly to be this. In fact she fails in the real world as many millennials do. But there is a chance for her, the book “Gilmour Girls”…

[@lsal4260]

For me it was when she chooses Yale over Harvard. It sucks the writers did this for the convenience of keeping all the characters close by. But on a narrative level Rory gives up her entire dream to attend a school without any good reason other than being near Lorelai and her grandparents--and then lets them pay for it. I think Harvard would've forced Rory to grow up more and find her own identity.

[@RilianSharp]

2:46 dean is the one who made a promise to lindsay and then broke it. his fault, not rory's.

[@bennusonmez847]

it was both their fault, rory was hella aware that dean was married when they had the affair, only a woman with no pride and a man who is an asshole can do such a thing.

[@nickjones9867]

I haven’t watched this show but on the face of it: You shouldn’t stay in university because it’s your parent’s dream. Especially one of the most high pressure universities going. And while it’s pretty gross to call dibs on somone, the main blame for cheating in a relationship is always the person in the relationship, not the person outside the relationship. It’s a bit of a trope to blame the other woman, and it’s rooted in misogyny.

[@kemycake]

As someone who is currently watching GG in S5, I still really hated the fact that Rory never got a proper "punishment" for cheating with AND on Dean. Although she was treated badly by Jess and karma got her, the fact that there was little to no intervention that happened about it. It just sort of became nothing. Lorelai knew that Rory cheated on Dean with Jess and did nothing but still condoned Rory. She scolded Rory for cheating WITH Dean on Lindsay but after being verbally "sorry" it just became okay to her. Nobody is perfect but god, Rory is such a princess.

[@taraakhavan3520]

i think it started the moment that girl chose yale over harvard