The Morning After I Killed Myself

[@meggieroyer5724]

Hello, I am the author of this piece and I wanted to thank illneas so much for creating this rendition! I'm truly grateful for his collaboration and support! I wrote this piece several years ago as someone who was suicidal and enduring a severe trauma. I'm continually humbled by the outpouring of support it has received. I posted it on my blog after I wrote it and never expected it to go viral. This piece was a letter to myself as a suicidal person, and so it may not resonate with everyone. I wrote it to myself and it was what I needed to hear at the time. Sending love to everyone who is currently or has been struggling to the point of considering suicide. I am thinking of you and wishing you the best across the world in the U.S. Have a wonderful day, everyone! Thank you again!

[@nicholasobiero7880]

Masterpiece

[@Mark00747]

This is so amazing! We should all live as if we had killed ourselves

[@JoseGonzalez-yw5iz]

Keep up the good work you are very talented

[@hypebeast7199]

Amazing

[@dsanjoy]

Thank you so much for expressing my thoughts so beautifully. Thank you. I need it now.

[@mika-ie4ke]

"too tired to stay too scared to leave"

[@agonycheeto6111]

Me

[@brynnwelte9197]

exactly how i feel.

[@fabianvanderelst9643]

I read that as too scarred. That'd have made sense as well

[@christinecandido8614]

damn 💯

[@nightlight-nuisance2971]

me 2 frien very tired and extremely scared

[@BlueberryRacha]

"I'm too tired to stay...I'm too scared to leave" You don't wanna die, you just want relief...

[@lostinwonderland6873]

Don't please don't life wouldn't be the same without you. Please don't healing will come.

[@lostinwonderland6873]

@@arakoz don't please don't, you have loved ones though you don't see it right now, please don't you are not alone I promise you that. My daughter has tried multiple times without me knowing I promise you now that I know her pain and illness their is help I promise you like my daughter you are not alone

[@DSchae2165]

yes

[@cadence4674]

exactly thats how I feel I don't want to loose my life, I just want to be free from it..(I'm not scared tho, I just worry)

[@joontae7065]

Stay for bts💗💜 I don't how you are now But please stay for your future Please stay for namjoon, seokjin, min yoongi, hobi, jungkook, jimin, taehyung I love you

[@hard_candy]

"... who now sat in his desk at school, trying desperately to believe I still existed." Oof! That one hit me.

[@divy1886]

Same!

[@ginyjuice]

same, that’s when i literally began to cry 💀

[@FoxOnTheRun92]

Same!! 💔

[@Sky-cp6kt]

Someone explain this

[@Dojasadi3458]

Me too.. The strongest verse

[@krysivory493]

I don't remember how it feels NOT to be suicidal.

[@raym764]

It's not right at all You should talk to someone else about your problems (maybe even me if you want to or you don't have anyone else)

[@baxundhara]

🫂🧿 i understand this very well and i hope we can, one day, finally understand what it feels like to be truly free

[@justagirl5593]

Listen to John Wheeler ‘Let’s get Real’ I think it will help ❤

[@babybread3888]

I'm not gonna say you matter cause in reality? You aren't gonna believe that. All I can say is to keep on doing simple things to care for yourself. Talk with someone. Someone loves you. Or many someones. You might not think you matter, but you do to them. As I said, do the simple things. Get out of bed. Make food and eat it. Talk to a loved one or make a friend...you'd be surprised at how easily you can find one. To love others, you gotta take care of yourself first. I have no experience, but this might help. We all support you here.

[@cyrusthelizardking]

Me too dude, me too I hipe that you'll be okay

[@짱구-n7x]

I was told there is a great difference between not wanting to live anymore, and not wanting to _live_ _like_ _this_ anymore

[@fionaxd2748]

🙏🏼🙏🏼❣️

[@spilledmilk_]

yeah i saved a quote similar to this on a notepad. brb- * ahem * ... hold on i have multiple quotes for s**cîde, please listen :') "i don't want to die, i just don't want to live like this, because this is _just staying alive_ and i hate it." - "don't think that life is over when you haven't even felt ALIVE yet" - "do not do something permanent over something temporary. you'll regret it" - "every star must see darkness before the light" and my favourite one:

[@mj-je7el]

Im there now 😥😥💔💔

[@socb5642]

sooo true

[@7starlight115]

@@spilledmilk_ my tears fall down as i read this. Thankyou for your effort to share this with us 🌹❤️

[@andrewpogue83]

"Think of yourself as dead. You have lived your life. Now take what's left and live it properly." - Marcus Aurelius

[@Kelberi]

thanks

[@drefloresca95]

the past friend of mine who recommended me that book recently died by suicide. i still miss him so much.

[@flowersmile123]

Nice quote.

[@marcusaurelius2787]

Apparently that's easier said than done for most

[@andrewpogue83]

@@marcusaurelius2787 It's easier said than done for all.

[@yeet96421]

that’s the whole problem, you often can’t see how beautiful everything is when you’re depressed. it takes something like this happening for you to realize

[@bellabrown5274]

Jesus loves you all I hope you accept Him and repent He wants you to come to Him, it’s time to accept Him :)

[@theshywolfie6655]

​@@bellabrown5274 I know u mean well, but this kind of post isn't going to reach everyone. Thank you for your kindness though, its sweet

[@-x_moon_x-]

@@bellabrown5274 joining a cult doesn't cure depression

[@SatyaPriya09]

Yup i know its hard to see the sun while its raining and when the complete sky is covered with clouds but it takes 1 unit just 1 unit to know that the sun is hidden in those clouds,that its these days that has hidden happiness I know its very easy to say bt very hard to take your heavy heart out there and hope at worst bt at that time that's all we could do hope,And prove our hopes through actions,place changing,sometimes sharing with unknown if known dont value u But for that u have to get out the 1st step The 1st step is alwz hardest i know bt when u get down in to up u never really realize and journey to better tomorrow beguns Just a little help I too suffered i know its very hard bt...its the only thing u can do

[@mimi-zz9nf]

@@bellabrown5274 don‘t bring religion into this

[@anushka.singh.02]

I was 12, I never thought I would make it, but look, I am 22 and still here.. I survived myself.

[@Jul_studies_0_0]

congrats didi, keep going.

[@rockingyourboat2]

Same

[@mototheglow]

Why didn't you think you'd make it? Asking because I know how hard depression can be but how does it affect at 12 years of age?

[@shivkumarpatne3459]

I was 5, but look 24 still like to die though

[@bruceenagel5934]

Praise God! No matter the struggles, keep looking towards Jesus, trusting in His love. One foot in front of the other.

[@ShoSho-wu2oi]

My little Sister hung herself and was one of the lucky ones because she was cut down and after months of rehabilitation to get her organs working properly again and get the yellowness from her skin, she sat with me and told me that the moment she was dying was the moment that she had never wanted to live more in her life, she tells me about the petals in the flowers being brighter than ever and the sounds of her environment are so amplified, the love she feels for her family and herself. xxx

[@normalpeople012]

Amen! I hope you and your family and sister are safe . God loves you

[@lenap9667]

I've heard stories like this before and they always make me tear up! I'm so glad your sister is still with us ❤

[@de4830]

wow. i’ve never heard from a survivor in that way before, i’d love to more.

[@gmariailman]

god bless your family!

[@nataliepowell9616]

wow this made me cry. such a beautiful story. so happy for her recovery

[@ShadoWolf43]

I read a really interesting piece recently. It was titled “why do people jump” and showed a famous picture of a man jumping off a building. The article went on to say that what if in this photo we could see the building was on fire and the pain of burning was greater then jumping. Just because we can’t see the fire doesn’t mean it’s not there. No one wants to jump or die but The fire that’s been burning in their mind for so long is so powerful and painful that jumping is the less painful option. It summed up depression and suicidal thoughts really clearly for me so just wanted to share

[@TomorrowWeLive]

This

[@ShadoWolf43]

@@ivexoxo Yes that one! Didn't realize till you said it and I looked it up

[@valerievalentova]

Any chance you'd be able to find that article? I'd like to read it but can't seem to find it

[@cockycookie1]

This is beautiful. Thank you.

[@faeinacup]

This, this is beautiful

[@n1na_ez]

"With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed." This part hit.

[@user-hs9ce2bv4t]

I cried so much at this part.

[@Elysion404]

Same. It's my sister for me. She still leaves me little notes at random places just to let me know I matter.

[@Rafmee]

@@Elysion404 awhh she's so precious. And you are as well, know that.

[@Elysion404]

@@Rafmee She's absolutely lovely, and thank you 💜 so are you!

[@chloeellman7432]

thats when i started to sob

[@speismissing]

living with depression and anxiety is a constant cycle and struggle of "I don't want to live" and "I don't want to die". It does keep me alive but I'm tired from being controlled by both

[@antojonz]

I feel the exact same, having to deal with both is so overwhelming at times :/ I hope you're doing better since this comment

[@TistenMelby]

SAME, at the moment I’m thinking of suicide, I think you can guess why I’m even watching this video

[@fireblade1986]

I'm in your boat... Just I learned for me it's like a jumping ball... the harder you smash into the ground, the higher you can bounce and soar for a while... I learned to accept that I will hit the floor again and it will be painful, but as I stopped myself from trying to not fall to the ground, it doesn't hurt less but it's a shorter phase and the times that I can enjoy life get longer and more colorful. I whish I had wings, but that's just not what I am right now... eventually I'll come across someone giving me wings, but until then I'll keep on bouncing sometimes higher and harder, sometimes lower and gentle

[@terenbatista2893]

Same here. The only thing that keeps me from doing it is the people that I know will suffer my death

[@Amoogus]

You want your own choice.

[@STAYTM0325]

I'm not suicidal and this made me want to live for a thousand years.

[@MsXOXO]

proud of you!

[@ModernIntuitionist]

That's the highest compliment. It's what good art should do

[@purebliss2669]

The only way to receive true happiness is to be born again.Jesus loves you and is coming back to earth soon.You need to repent.Please believe and spread the word...

[@whooiszaza]

Tahrima Moula Tanisa proud of you ♡︎

[@JudeWeraduwage]

Become an eternally-roaming spirit like me then

[@haritanambiar4914]

"The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love with life." Only this statement once told to me has given me the strength to hang in there.

[@sanjivanigohain]

I hope you have overcome it.

[@bedwar12494]

just don't *hang in there*

[@hONeyBunZnSunNyFunZ]

@@bedwar12494 LMAOOOOO

[@DontNoahLot]

terrible wording

[@brooketaylor808]

So true. I tried to kill myself last week on Monday. I was so tired. The day after however I could feel something had changed a lot. Now I realize it's that I fell in love with life again. I started looking for a job, started looking for what I wanted to do in life. Started making actual changes. It's really hard but I don't want to die I just don't want to think like this anymore

[@syedraidarsalan4685]

Ever seen anti-suicide videos made by governments. Did they help? Obviously no. But this, this is a masterpiece.

[@reimuhakurei2123]

this tbh

[@Drarack]

Yeah, I dunno. Maybe I'm weird, but this sort of slow-paced sappy shit doesn't really do much for me. Still just boils down to the same tired 'look at the bright side', 'you don't know what you had till it's gone' cliches.

[@reimuhakurei2123]

@@Drarack its always cliche i dont know what your talking about

[@nothoughtsheadempty...8281]

yeah bcoz that's actually made by a suicidal person, not a group of ppl ordered to finish a project. the government doesn't understand that if you want to make someone to listen to you is to listen to them first. to understand how they are feeling. they think that with a plain "do not kill yourself." they finished the deal. it's not that simple and it will never be...

[@melisonline_]

@@Drarack you never really know the impact of hearing it until after attempting it yourself.

[@insanity910]

When you see a depressed person suddenly happy, nothing is right, because a suicidal person doesn't always look suicidal.

[@NannieG-y6v]

My brother hid it well 😢

[@insanity910]

@@NannieG-y6v Im so sorry for you! :(

[@NannieG-y6v]

@@insanity910 thank you so much

[@insanity910]

@@NannieG-y6v np! :)

[@lizxu322]

usually when they look suddenly happier, it's a sign that they will unalive themselves SOON. their 'happiness' is their peace at knowing their mind is made up and that they're about to do it. source: search it up online. it's a well known phenomenon. if they look happier, THEY DID NOT GET BETTER. THEY NEED HELP MORE THAN EVER

[@AbiRoseMusic]

It’ll be three years since my last attempt on the 28th of this month. I’m starting grad school soon, getting married, all that.... I never thought I’d make it this far. But I am so grateful I did.

[@cassiadsouza709]

I'm so happy you've grown and gotten this far! Sending you lots of love and happiness.

[@de4830]

in a week it will be one year since my first attempt and i’m just going downhill towards it. i’m so proud of you for making it this far, you can do this ❤️

[@allisonpeschek7929]

I'm so proud of you that you did. Please keep going.

[@katie9869]

I’m so proud of you

[@pizzapepperonipizza]

You did WELL,LUV

[@gigibeal]

this is honestly what schools should show for suicidal awarness month cuz the corny lil "you are not alone." poems are kinda getting reptitive at this point.

[@jasmineg38]

@@poopskinniccer9992 was this supposed to be funny 😐

[@gigibeal]

@@jasmineg38 that's what i was wondering ://

[@bobapearl9565]

My school dosent even being up suicide awareness month

[@magpie322]

I know. Like, I know I'm not alone, but the fact that so many people make such a big deal out of something the second that you say the smallest thing makes me want to hide again

[@oreowaflles]

@@bobapearl9565 yeah mine neither

[@hiimangel763]

*“the bravest thing that person can do is to stay alive when they wanted to die.”*

[@DarthYall]

It just sucks how it doesn't even feel brave. It feels like cowardice because you can't bring yourself to just end it.

[@hiimangel763]

@@DarthYall no you are brave enough to stay in this world in this cruel society full of judgement and the for me the definition of cowardice is to run away from your own problems stay strong it'll gonna be okay🖤😊

[@ayeshaannie6017]

This made me cry llol

[@hiimangel763]

@@ayeshaannie6017 don't worry everything is gonna be alright /Sending virtual hug

[@zhizntsirka2283]

I hate that everyone calls suicide cowardice. They call it running away from a life that you weren't brave enough to face. I appreciate that this quote doesn't say that directly

[@mplplays]

Some people who are suicidal don't want to die, they just want the pain to go away

[@horsepanther]

I would say that is true of ALL people who are suicidal. It seems like their only solution to an unbearable situation. But it's worth continuing to try to turn things around; confide in someone you trust--often just being able to say out loud what you're going through can relieve part of the burden. Seek professional counseling. If medication is recommended, don't refuse to try it because of the fear that it might change who you are; it doesn't, but even if it did, saving your life is a lot more important than the vague possibility that you might change. I say that as someone who resisted medication for a long time. It could be life-changing.

[@SuperVladdrakula]

@@horsepanther "But it's worth continuing to try to turn things around" No, if it leads to only more loss... "confide in someone you trust" What if there isn't anyone?

[@aubree7524]

“Life isn’t about how hard a hit you can take, it’s about how many hits you can take and still get up and keep going.”

[@SNFXVlogs]

Is that a rocky quote ?

[@parulpatel9179]

ARMY 💜

[@RyanGamesYT]

It's not about how hard you can hit, it's about hard you can get hit and keep moving forward

[@lastcoloroftherainbow9060]

hey army💜

[@xatiter]

Damn, that's so true.

[@gloomyguy792]

"The morning after I killed myself I tried to unkill myself". This part hurts

[@agustinastclair2203]

🥲🥲🥲

[@badiewithoutthebodie]

That part hit me hard as shit

[@SCP_with_a_stolen_phone_hehe]

@@Godblessed2 I have tried to hang myself and It was the worst thing one can imagine. I didn't make the upper knot right so I fell and lived but I could have died that day and never experienced the beauty of my surroundings. I'm 14 and still suicidal sadly but at least I didn't try it since so maybe I'll get better

[@17luckynumbers]

@@SCP_with_a_stolen_phone_hehe Please don't ever think about it again! Your life is going to change in so many beautiful ways! You just have to fight hard on the days the demon whispers in your ear, tell him to F-off, you're going to have a wonderful life! Love & Light to You ❤️

[@17luckynumbers]

@@Godblessed2 I watched a documentary on jumpers of the Golden Gate bridge, San Francisco, they interviewed the a survivor and he said... “the minute I let go, I wished I hadn't”. It's amazing, I don't know how he survived!

[@Maria-rb8cq]

I just want to hug the child in me that is suffering so much. The child that misses mama. That wants to grow pumpkins with grandma again. That wants to feel the embrace of papa's strong arms. The person I used to be who saw the world in such a beautiful light.

[@lr9495]

❤️❤️🥺

[@Lely2.0]

Mama and papa did their part now its your turn to make a memorable experience for the people that you care about

[@veela1324]

I want to offer that child a hug too. That part will always live on in us & even when it is hard, we have to learn to parent that part of ourselves in order to feel whole

[@veela1324]

@@Lely2.0 We all have inner children that need tending to, no matter what age we are. When we shut it down & focus solely on others & their needs, we violate & ignore that child & it creates so much of the depression & numbness that is prevalent in our society

[@Maria-rb8cq]

@@veela1324 I just want to say that I find you to be a wonderful and beautiful person inside and out. Your words brought tears to my eyes and I can't thank you enough for it. Me, and the inner child would love to give you the warmest and most thankful hug we possibly could. I'm understanding that what I miss as a child can come back, but in ways I wouldn't imagine. Maybe the reason I was born at all is to move on and grow my own pumpkins, give someone the strong and warm embrace I miss so much, and maybe one day I won't miss it at all; but smile while doing it for someone else

[@OceanFriend]

Today, something bad happened. A friend called me. I was listening to him and suddenly he told me that he wants to end his life. He is just a 18 year old boy. But his parents sent him to a relative's house. They didn't even allow him to keep a smart phone. He doesn't know me for ages. Nor he talks to me so much. But today, he talked to me 29 minutes and I didn't cut the call until he wanted to do so. I tried to motivate him in so many ways. I told him to talk to teachers. He told me he tried to talk to his parents but it was fruitless. He feels so lonely and tortured. He once forbade me to call him as his relative picks the phone and scolds him. So, I have nothing to do than to pray. Please pray for him. He shouldn't take any wrong decision. And I cannot in person meet him too because he changed his city recently. may he finds support.

[@JeissiAraujo]

I will pray for him this night

[@OceanFriend]

@@JeissiAraujo Thank you.

[@thetoptap]

I will pray for him.

[@Spikethepurpledragon-gr6rn]

You seem like a genuinely good person. Thank you, even that talk probably made so much of a difference to him.

[@itsjestjay]

[@lenor.4303]

as a person who is suicidal, this hurts to watch. i’m crying-

[@eggles2896]

I hope you’re better.. :( me too,

[@b4nny816]

I love you for staying strong:)))

[@doooooo567]

Stay strong. You’re stronger than you think❤️

[@kimberligarcia4]

Me too

[@hpieces]

I hope everything is gonna be ok for you :) I’m here when you need me

[@marbles.thefool]

I feel so emotionally connected to this. I tried to kill myself once. The thing that stopped me was myself and I knew this was wrong how much I would miss and not see. Then my dog came in the room I saw how his expression changed and how his tail stopped wagging, I untied the rope from my neck and he immediately went to comfort me. None of my family knows I did it. Only one saw that day. And he's the reason I'm still here.

[@alectronablack555]

💕

[@lumaaaaa17]

♥️

[@user-uh6vy4mo3j]

m.kzbin.info/www/bejne/qpazeaycfrdmga8 💗💗💗

[@jexca_veritas]

🤍

[@corrinapett]

💔

[@azarqoa9665]

Little does the author of this video know, how many people they must’ve saved from dying...

[@S_W_]

The author commented on this video if you’d like to see. :)

[@andi-oop-2840]

It was 999 and I made it 1K Also: a reallyyyy good point.

[@M1guel7Dias]

I dont see how It would save anyone. People who commit suicide cannot defend themselves so people think they are idiots. After you kill yourself there will not be a morning after and also there will be no more pain for what brought you to the point of commiting suicide. I still stand as a depressive suicidal who struggles everyday. And I find this video offensive. It takes down a lot from what is a decision and not an impulse.

[@andi-oop-2840]

@@M1guel7Dias true.?!

[@_kay_Rayne]

@@M1guel7Dias I can see where you are coming from as I too am depressed. I have been for a year. I have tried so hard but nothing works. However for me I find this beautiful. I interpret it as a reminder of the good in our lives whether we see it or not. The most mundane things can sometimes be the most special things. It describes where she grew up and the people around her that love her. It's so easy to look past these things when there is so much stress, anxiety, and sadness in ones life. So for me, this was a good reminder to keep fighting. And that even through this living hell, there are still things out there that are good.

[@alanthealligator9908]

i come back to this video so often as a person who’s been dealing with suicidal thoughts, depression and other disorders for several years. i turned 18 this year and heading to college soon, and i know what i want to do. despite that though i still deal with this, deep feeling of just “no longer wanting to be tired and aimless”. i have an online friend group whom i deeply adore, who love me and wouldn’t ever mind for me to confide with them, but i’ve been dealing with my own emotions alone for so long that it’s genuinely a struggle to just list down what im feeling to them in a way that makes sense. i feel so shallow sometimes because of it, that i shouldn’t feel crippling loneliness and sadness everyday because i have friends who do care, even if they’e only online. i dont have anyone to blame other than myself, i live everyday drowning in guilt and envy that i try so hard to hide. ive been hiding it for so long, yet now it feels like its been breaking through more often than not. ive never cried so much in just half a year. i listen to others talk about how their irl friends are so nice and how they do things they enjoy with their family and i just experience this nagging feeling of sadness because i wished i could’ve been able to experience the same thing. my irls would ghost me more often than not and my family have emotionally neglected me for all my life. every time it feels like im starting to recover, it seems like everything comes back to bite me and drag me down the same hole. every time i shower there’s just a buzzing thought of “what if i just killed myself ?”. most of the time id then just try to remind myself that id hurt everyone around me, that people would blame themselves for my death, and i dont want to inflict that guilt upon others. yet sometimes i still do wish how relieving itd be to be dead, if i could write a note for the people i loved to convince themselves that it’s not their fault i died, it’s mine, because i’ve been struggling for so long, i couldn’t help myself. there’s comfort i find in this video. it makes me sad but not in a bad way, it reminds me that there’s still thing i want to do and i cant die without doing them first. i want to be able to meet my friends, the people i care about, in person, to spend time with them and love them because they matter so much to me. i feel so much pain everyday that its like im drowning, but theres still thing that keeps me alive because theyre so sentimental to me, so i try to carry on anyways. even if somedays i feel like im only alive to help others and their issues, theres still days i feel like im only alive because only now ive been able to start experiencing what it feels like to actually be loved and be cared for by people you love. im sorry if this doesnt make any sense, im not the best at wording my own feelings, but i just wanted to leave this here on the video that had gave me motivation to keep living even after two attempts. and thank you to the kind strangers who’ve took time out of their day to read this, i hope you the best in life.

[@glindasgirl.ৎ]

I want you to know that im so proud of you for being so strong, and if you ever need to talk to someone then im here for you

[@aRoseSomeoneLeftOnTheBeach]

I once was in a similar place to yours, the only ones I could talk to were my online friends and I couldn’t just end it without somebody telling that i am not there anymore could I? And my parents would blame themselves and oh my brother, he’s the precious person to me and I would do anything to make sure he doesn’t get hurt. So I started off living for them, and I have come a long way to be where I am now. And I am happy to say that I am ok. Not good not stable not sad. Just ok. And for now that is all I need. I am sending you all my strength and love and trust me it’ll get better

[@gattasara]

I hope you'll feel better

[@Selam-fr4lf]

When I want to stop existing, I feel it’s because I’m tired of living. I always remember later, it’s not life I hate, it’s the mask I’m wearing. I wish to be free, not dead.

[@lynnlavy2992]

Wearing a mask is all I have ever done until very recently. By wearing a mask I never attracted truly kind and like minded people. But the narcissists saw through my mask and saw how vulnerable I really was. I had no problem attracting them and they were all I had.

[@brunomendes8031]

@@lynnlavy2992 I don't think any mask you can wear is going to be effective hiding your true self. Maybe take it out, and good people will come to you. They are rare, but they exist

[@lynnlavy2992]

@@brunomendes8031 Rare i deed, Thank you Bruno. I do appreciate your comment.

[@virginiacollins]

I find that I tell myself I’m wearing a mask rather than wearing one. It think helps with my deep self hatred if I tell my self that all the actions I do are not “my own” and “it’s my mask” it helps me distance my brain and my actual self. I can’t escape it now it’s become so natural to me. I just want to love myself again love the things I say and do and not say that it’s a “mask” or “not me” I don’t even know who me is. Well this is a KZbin comment that no one will ever find so lol.

[@Selam-fr4lf]

@@virginiacollins I understand. I find it easier to be mask free when I’m meeting someone for the first time (they don’t have an expectation of me yet) or after I’ve slowly built trust with someone and see they’re the kind of person who accepts everyone. It use to feel like I had a control station in my head and I was evaluating which response would make someone like me more/etc. Now I try to do/say the first thing that pops in my head. Jordan Peterson and Thais Gibson videos on KZbin helped me understand myself. I believe you can live the life you deserve 💖

[@johnny5gr]

It's such a lovely contradiction between melancholia and optimism.

[@illneas]

Exactly and Iness I think captured it greatly with her voice.

[@johnny5gr]

@@illneas Totally. Kudos to both of you. You bring people like me closer to poetry.

[@tommyaguirre3479]

@@illneas she did.

[@enfrazi9721]

@@effiet9344 psychic state of depression but with no specific reason

[@rosa7264]

@@effiet9344 I wouldn't say that it's a psychic state of depression - it's more like finding comfort in the sadness in an often somehow artistic way. That's the strange thing about it, because some people "can't" experience raw happiness without this little hint of melancholia in it - it can be drowning but also enjoyable. U don't have to be depressed to know how melancholia feels like.

[@nightshade9177]

As someone who is suicidal, I felt something after watching this. And it makes me think, that maybe I should hold on a little longer.

[@tifanir5298]

Please, please do.

[@7epha527]

stay

[@sristighosh3446]

stay, it'll get better

[@pumkkin6648]

Don't hold on a little longer... Hold on and don't let go!

[@leobeloved]

stay for me. sending love, random stranger.

[@aperson11127]

Every time i watch this i always cry no matter how many times i see it. It's a good thing to watch when you're down.

[@Jul_studies_0_0]

right.

[@Andreas137]

Sometimes, the only reason why you're still here, is because you care more about the people you would leave behind... than yourself...

[@Andreas137]

@@Keepignoringmeh Then I am glad we both have people we love

[@atom-kx7yf]

Yep

[@annaairahala9462]

I don't think this is accurate. A lot of suicidal people think they are doing their loved ones a favor by ridding themselves. That low self-esteem and little value some people put in themselves I think is the more common occurrence

[@nonpine]

@@annaairahala9462 i agree with both statements, it honestly depends on the person.

[@thenovaguy386]

And yeah...

[@LeeorAlexandra]

This is the most important video I've watched all year long.

[@skyy5584]

God bless you.

[@illneas]

I'm glad you like it

[@Gracem2013]

It really is. I’ve been contemplating suicide for the last year and this gutted me. Made me see things in a very different way. Forced me to really think about what my children & parents would feel or possibly go through. Cried the whole way through.

[@musicforyou7648]

@@Gracem2013 I hope you feel better. You still have an amazing life ahead of you! And you’ll get past this!

[@0dollars826]

@@Gracem2013 I’m glad you’re here. I’ve been in this position before- some suggestions, sit down with yourself in a peaceful setting and just have a moment to think about your feelings. Even crying is a good option. Remember- you’re loved, you matter, and it’s okay to have emotions.

[@sody9798]

*I’m not suicidal, I’m just tired of living... There’s a difference...* -Unknown

[@InternationalCurls]

And if you don't do something about it the latter may turn into the former

[@NW-zg5qt]

@@InternationalCurls you don't need to do something about it, you need to learn why it happens. A bird cannot teach a squirrel to fly. The squirrel must learn who he is and why he is there.

[@LadyLazarus1027]

that's actually also being suicidal...

[@Chris-eu2ls]

@@NW-zg5qt the squirrel wouldn’t understand the bird nor the bird understand the squirrel. Sorry but that made no sense

[@meije6511]

@@Chris-eu2ls the fu- bro you just gotta understand it y'know?

[@be_a_bright_sparkle3687]

Last year my 16yr old Grand-daughter took a paracetamol over dose with half a bottle of Vodka just before her GCSE exam…she fortunately told a friend what she’d done because she didn’t like the way her body was feeling and was scared. Her friend told a teacher and she was taken to hospital. She took 18 tablets and was monitored for 48hrs. She survived. 12 months later, she has just completed her first year at college. She remembered the anniversary and reminded me. I asked if she was glad she survived..her reply was “Nanna, I never thought I’d be happy, have friends and fit in”…🥰

[@StrikerCup79]

“with my brother who once believed in unicorn but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe i still existed” that was deep

[@briar947]

two little brothers. thinking of this quote.

[@zainabchattha5334]

That trauma...

[@kathymatamoros4963]

not deep but relatable

[@hearthartemis8881]

@@kathymatamoros4963 It was deep for me as my brother was the one who witnessed my attempt at suicide and since then he was always sticking by my side wherever I go.

[@kathymatamoros4963]

@@hearthartemis8881 no need to tell me your life and what you are describing is that it was relatable

[@depresso-messo6665]

what sucks is being aware of all this beauty but having an immense sadness that trumps over it all, every single second of the day

[@lynnlavy2992]

Well put. So many people try to fight this monster. It is exhausting and soul crushing. Gratitude and positivity is not nearly enough when our brains our chemically lacking or not functioning as they should.

[@loisreugebrink4968]

I hear you, for quit a while a struggled with a depression on somedays I was able to see the beauty and the good but on most I just felt overwhelmed with a sense of darkness. Everything felt meaningless and it felt like my soul had already died while my body was still forced to life out the days. I struggled with suicidal thoughts. I would really recommend watching this video below: kzbin.info/www/bejne/nITZfImNqJutfcU I don’t what is going on in your head or in your life just know that Jesus loves you and ending your life is not the only way to end the pain. I struggled with a depression and getting through the day often seemed impossible but Jesus got me out that place. Just know that ending your life is not the only way to end the pain or frustration. I hope you see this and look at the video. The Bible app also has great Bible plans on depression that helped me out a lot. I hope and pray that you will find inner peace. It will get better even if that seems impossible. I will definitely be praying for you and know that I am rooting for you :) I really believe that there will come a day when you are no longer trying to survive the day but exactly be capable of being present and enjoy it. But for now please hold on. It will get better even if that seems impossible. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” ‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11-13‬ ‭NLT‬‬ www.bible.com/116/jer.29.11-13.nlt

[@loisreugebrink4968]

@@lynnlavy2992 I hear you, for quit a while a struggled with a depression on somedays I was able to see the beauty and the good but on most I just felt overwhelmed with a sense of darkness. Everything felt meaningless and it felt like my soul had already died while my body was still forced to life out the days. I struggled with suicidal thoughts. I would really recommend watching this video below: kzbin.info/www/bejne/nITZfImNqJutfcU I don’t what is going on in your head or in your life just know that Jesus loves you and ending your life is not the only way to end the pain. I struggled with a depression and getting through the day often seemed impossible but Jesus got me out that place. Just know that ending your life is not the only way to end the pain or frustration. I hope you see this and look at the video. The Bible app also has great Bible plans on depression that helped me out a lot. I hope and pray that you will find inner peace. It will get better even if that seems impossible. I will definitely be praying for you and know that I am rooting for you :) I really believe that there will come a day when you are no longer trying to survive the day but exactly be capable of being present and enjoy it. But for now please hold on. It will get better even if that seems impossible. If you are able please try to find help. Talk to people and try to continue to fight. You are worth fighting for. “Don’t be afraid of them because the LORD your God is the one who will be fighting for you.” ‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭3:22‬ ‭CEB‬‬ www.bible.com/37/deu.3.22.ceb “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:31‬ ‭NLT‬‬ www.bible.com/116/isa.40.31.nlt

[@lynnlavy2992]

@@loisreugebrink4968 You are precious and thank you so very much. I will watch the video and I will work on feeling better. I think I have found a home and my people in this channel. I have always hidden the pain and I look forward to more help and less judgement for future generations. Thank you again, and I wish you blessings, good health, safety, and God's love.

[@chloereed454]

It would help if people were kinder to each other. Some people have no idea they’re actions could effect someone’s mental health. It’s amazing what kindness can do to someone struggling with trying to stay alive..

[@Mila-vw2og]

"i saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me, so we could play catch, but saw nothing, but sky in my place" im sobbing

[@DonnaLew52]

as the mother of a suicide I cried through the whole thing

[@just_lex1626]

this part made me really sad as well.

[@sootcoot8712]

I want to get a dog. Something to keep my lows to not go too low and the unconditional love every morning as i wake up.

[@dolorosaenigmakil]

What about this resonated with you most? 🌌

[@krwawamary7683]

I'm sorry that I have ever thought of killing myself...😭 I just want to know that someone REALLY loves me and REALLY understands me, not leaving me after two months :( Am I born in the wrong time line? I'm trans in the fucking Poland section, and also disabled (schizophrenia and spectrum of autism). Every time I try reach out and talk to people, they don't have time or courage to explain me :"what I'm doing wrong in the terms of social norms?" and even they tell me, this is the signal mostly about " gtfo, we don't want you here!" It is that much that I want decent job so I can have stable Internet connection, food and soap? That I want "to have" (loved one isn't my property, is single human) love one?

[@SPXC3_MUSHR0oMSWcue]

This made me cry. It made me think about you can be so confident in doing something, then you do it, and everything gets *worse.*

[@kikaha56]

I came really close to hanging myself in a tree. As I sat there on the branch 2 little girls ran by below me. I could not go through with it then for the fear of them finding me. I climbed down looked around and there was no sign of them. To this day I call them my little angels.I thank you so much for this.

[@MISSMADISONMEDIA]

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@wendyshaw5658]

Definitely your guardian angels watching over you in life

[@t.n.h.ptheneohumanpatterna8334]

Your hallucinating lol 😂

[@torstenq2125]

​@@t.n.h.ptheneohumanpatterna8334Not funny

[@TheManBehindtheFunny]

​@@t.n.h.ptheneohumanpatterna8334 Crazy that you hallucinated thinking that "your" was the correct one.

[@jadestone5160]

The fact that I saw this after an attempt makes me believe its a sign to stay Edit: thanks guys for your kind words. I'm doing much better now and I'm focusing on my mental health more. Everytime I see a notification about a comment, it honestly makes my day. Yall have been helping me so much when it comes to feeling like I matter. Thank you to everyone. I love you all so much ❤ Edit2: Just wanted to give you guys an update. I'm a soon-to-be-mother now! Not only has this community and this message helped me but you all have helped me get to a point in my life where I'm happy just being alive. I have a permanent reason to stay here soon lol. Whoever is reading this just know it's hard as hell and it never stops but man does it get so much easier when you fight to keep going. No matter the situation you're in it's never the end of the world or the end of you. Plus I need tons of aunties and uncles (i cant find a nonbinary term but yall are also included!!) for this baby and you're one of them now!

[@Brujitadesuenos]

Love you, someone is always here for you. Even if it doesnt always seem like it. The world can be so lonely but someone will always miss you, even if its not the people you expect. Thank you for staying ♥️

[@stormfischerr]

it really is. keep fighting 💖💕❤️💗

[@coeurulea]

please stay

[@assadavidsdottir2650]

it is a sign to stay❤️

[@angelinam6123]

It is

[@abdulhakimdahir233]

REGRET has never been spelt out in such a poetic manner. Absolutely sublime.

[@Smirksol]

so true

[@thefifthstage369]

Tru facts bro

[@Octavia-nd3br]

I'm confused about what this poem is talking about

[@purebliss2669]

The only way to receive true happiness is to be born again.Jesus loves you and is coming back to earth soon.You need to repent.Please believe and spread the word...

[@Octavia-nd3br]

@@purebliss2669 There's 4.3k religons that exist. How can u be so sure yours is the right one?

[@fmach12]

Perfect. We can only experience life being alive. "Pain is unavoidable but suffering is a choice".

[@davidthe16th90]

*The morning after I killed myself* *I fell in love with life*

[@Kelberi]

deep!

[@selene2048]

Bruh moment

[@bealis7]

The poem would touch me alot more if it said that

[@StatchanaReborn]

Was waiting this

[@heidiho5179]

@@bealis7 That’s the point of it. It does say that...you just have to follow each of the examples of falling in love with life, given by the author, to that conclusion. It hit me deeper that way, because I had to figure it out. Btw, I love your screen name. I think it just sort of capsulizes how I feel about taking time to do anything on here LOL.

[@m4k1r0ll2]

I was 12 when I first tried to hurt myself. I still have a scar in my left leg. When I was 14 I grabbed a knife on the kitchen table, went to the yard, and held the knife up to my heart. Right then I got a text. It was someone I loved. She started talking about her day, and everything she did. She told me that she loved me, and that she would be around forever. I didn’t even talk with her. I just looked at the messages, and the knife fell out of my hand. I’m now 16 and there’s not a day that goes by that I’m not grateful for that person.

[@jilyyyyy.]

glad you're still here.

[@piotrcz7871]

Sadly not everyone have such person

[@5misali13]

If suicide or death is only option left think again on reverse way . Love yourself first . None worthy of your love even family they hurts much than others sometimes you will get a position where you will find you are living alone in full world but thats time to be yourself . Kick out anything that give you thought of suicide live life happily with yourself .

[@NightmareRavioli]

...

[@nikhitachoudhury3514]

Sweetie, wherever you are, whoever you are, just know that I love you. It would make me so happy if you live a healthy and peaceful life. Don't be hard on yourself. Bad days are a part of us but there is always a reason to hold on.

[@themarschievous]

i cried when she said "I fell in love with my mother, who sat on the floor in my room"...

[@asadwholesomememe2749]

Same

[@asadwholesomememe2749]

And when she said, "I tried to unkill myself because I couldn't finish what i started."

[@number1a-hafan633]

I cried the whole time

[@themarschievous]

@Gemmariah Beadle I felt your comment. Listen, you know youre not alone. My uncle beat cancer this Feb and he was fighting it for two years. And sometimes even I feel so shitty but it all assembles when i think how bad days make us appreciate the good ones. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. There are millions of people like you and I. Dont give up because there are people who NEED you. And feel free to text me anytime. PLEASE.💜

[@brandyburkhart6423]

@Gemmariah Beadle Jesus loves you precious, call upon His name, accept Him as your saviour, with repentance and forgivness. He has a beautiful place for you where there is no more pain or sadness and there it is over flowing with love for you. He is the love of your life. Blessings to you, my prayers are for you. Much love.

[@Eva-hv9ki]

Damn time really does fly.. I was 15 when I watched this video for the first time.. I was hella depressed I used to have a really bad social anxiety too still do but I’m much better now.. I’m 18 now.. i actually love life now.. please never give up.. I really understand you and I love you ❤

[@KhalidSiddiquii]

I am 17, Thank you for your kind words I guess I really needed that because I also have very bad social anxiety and have been dealing with problems lately and since the past few weeks it has been so much worse. It feels so much better and refreshing when you have somebody to talk to. But I guess this is the way life teaches us. May your dreams inspire and guide you to great achievements. Good luck.

[@OreGIOOreGIO]

⁠@@KhalidSiddiquiiHey I’m in a similar situation, also 17. Let me know if you want someone to talk to

[@supergeekjay]

This hit a nerve with me. I'm in silent tears for the girlfriend I lost. Sarah, who, through the shame of a sexual smear campaign against her, took her own life by hanging, when we were at college 21 years ago. She became heavily depressed. The night she died I'd walked her home, where she'd kissed me deeply, which I'd later realise was a goodbye. She hanged herself while everyone was asleep, wracked by shame and guilt. I miss her so so much. The beautiful alternative girl with green hair and blue eyes, the sparkle of which I would never see again. I love you, Sarah. Always and forever. Please, please guys, never bully or smear someone. It can leave deep wounds that never recover. Smear campaigns and bullying ruin lives. Her poor mother had to find her own daughter hanged. I as her boyfriend still miss her terribly. I will never replace her. RIP Sarah Morgan - 10 March 1985 - 4th September 2000

[@genocider9782]

so sorry for your loss, rip Sarah

[@sarahs.8747]

as someone who’s name is Sarah, who is depressed, this changed my life a little.

[@sakuranovaryan9261]

God bless her soul.

[@kevinvanderzouw489]

15 yo and after 20 years shared, cherished and not forgotten. I hope she is in a happier place now and she is most likely always with you. Maybe not just in your heart 💖 but right next to you. I wonder what her final thoughts were, you will never know but im sure it involved you

[@mom2cescabella]

I’m so sorry for your pain …. Your description of Sarah was so beautiful.

[@KS-wk6uk]

“The secret of life is to die before you die and find that there’s no death.” -Rumi

[@delicious9930]

A lot like what Marcus Aurelius preached. There’s a deep sense of peace which invades me just thinking about it

[@vngelicath1580]

That’s literally the Christian message in a nutshell. When you realize that you’ve already died to yourself - the second death becomes an illusion... then you render yourself unstoppable.

[@dramaboyle6525]

This sound like buddhism

[@tikatikb]

[@starrynight5207]

@@dramaboyle6525 rumi was a sufi, just to clarify

[@Madouwithlove]

this feel like a hug when you're actually suicidal

[@thestoryoflife368]

Message me whenever you need to talk to someone

[@silinduranwala3675]

It truly is!!

[@morgonwalters1885]

No better way to explain it this poem has saved me so much .

[@LA-fr4gp]

Felt that

[@osakathebest]

fr

[@snake_power5628]

"The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love with life." is something I wish I could say

[@ImmortalWazir]

This is beautiful in a sad way.

[@bloodmoon2135]

it is called dark Romantic

[@isabellamorris4029]

It is bittersweet

[@babybbbb]

Dare I say melancholy?

[@eduardochavacano]

babybbbb That was the word I thought... but dark romantic sounds better.

[@isabellamorris4029]

@@eduardochavacano i can see that

[@justtamara1278]

I don’t exactly want to die I just don’t want to live like this anymore.

[@tobiasgross6899]

I know exactly how you feel and I am so so sorry. Things do get better and you just have to look for the little things. Start collecting rocks, or start baking. Start going on walks or texting your friends. Things will get better and I wish the absolute best for you

[@lynnlavy2992]

Wow. So true for so many. Thank you for your comment. I know it has helped some people. Please hold on!

[@raiivenwastaken]

I’m so sorry I know it’s hard but I promise it will get better So please keep going Life is a volatile thing And you’ll be happy one day, I promise

[@aesthetics_sounds]

yea same but like i wanna be me but I don't wannabe me the way i sm rn ykk?

[@lynnlavy2992]

@@aesthetics_sounds Take one little step at a time and be loving and gentle with yourself.

[@monicadearaujo4498]

There’s this video I really like of a guy who jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge and survived. He said that as soon as he let go off the cable and jumped, he realized he had made the biggest mistake of his life and in a matter of seconds all his life problems suddenly seemed solvable and not so unbearable as he once thought they were. Then all he could think about while the water was getting closer and closer was “I don’t wanna die”. Fortunately he did survive to pass his story on. As a suicide attempt survivor, I feel profoundly touched by his words. Once we get to see death that close, it makes us not want to go near it ever again. We’re living in atypical circumstances lately, but remember to check on your loved ones during this quarantine. We might make more difference in people’s lives than we think we do. And above all: take care of yourself. Sending much love to y’all! Stay safe!

[@natalieedelstein]

Gotta say that's a very personal opinion that doesn't apply to all because I'm also a survivor of attempted suicide and did attempt many times after having been "that close to death". That didn't change it for me at the time. Mine was related to PTSD, and I stopped attempting two months post-trauma, which was over 3 and a half years ago, but perhaps maybe that sentiment is more common with other causes of suicidality or maybe it was just different for me; I don't know.

[@monicadearaujo4498]

@@natalieedelstein Yes, I agree! Mine was related to depression, something I have already recovered from through the use of medication and psychotherapy. Didn’t mean to generalize it, for sure we all have different perceptions and experiences. Don’t know how you’ve been after all this time, but I sincerely hope you’re doing better! Wishing you well! ❤️

[@natalieedelstein]

@@monicadearaujo4498 no worries. You too

[@briandunn6157]

I saw that video! :(

[@simoneesposito5166]

Or as the writers of BoJack Horseman put it: The weak breeze whispers nothing The water screams sublime His feet shift, teeter-totter Deep breath, stand back, it’s time Toes untouch the overpass Soon he’s water bound Eyes locked shut but peek to see The view from halfway down A little wind, a summer sun A river rich and regal A flood of fond endorphins Brings a calm that knows no equal You’re flying now You see things much more clear than from the ground It’s all okay, it would be Were you not now halfway down Thrash to break from gravity What now could slow the drop All I’d give for toes to touch The safety back at top But this is it, the deed is done Silence drowns the sound Before I leaped I should’ve seen The view from halfway down I really should’ve thought about The view from halfway down I wish I could’ve known about The view from halfway down

[@Mahariin]

Sometimes, I think of attempts but never actually make one, for more than a year ago until now. I even make a joke, for myself, that it’d be “interesting” to see people I know cry in my funeral. I also think of self-harm and find it an “exciting” way to understand depressed people a little bit. But it’d be annoying if someone find out so I still didn’t it. However, I seriously think, I realize, no I admit, that deep down, I’m always aware of my cruelty. Because if I suicide, it means I betray my own life, betray my parents, my friends (I wonder if they consider me a friend too). Unlike others, I don’t get top scores but I don’t even try either. I know I can do better but I’m always tired of making a single effort and I hate that attitude of mine. My parents hardly ask me to get an excellent mark, they just support me to try harder. This hits me hard. Because I don’t bother to give them a “gift”, regardless physically or spiritually, as a thanks but just a heavy burden that is me. So what can I do? If I’m dead, they’ll feel sad (won’t they); but if I’m alive, they can’t relax either. I should’ve not been born from the very beginning. That’s why I’m different from suicidal people. They’re victim of life itself while I am a selfish weirdo. You see, even bad guy like me isn’t dead yet then why should you? Remember, you tried for your entire life to be alive, you deserve the best and don’t call yourself worthless. I hope y’all will see the beauty of the world soon. Good luck!

[@charliedog9641]

I wish you luck too friend. It's tough to live, and you are not selfish for feeling the way you do. The brain is so complex, sometimes it, like people, makes mistakes.

[@insomniacbabe712]

I've felt suicidal so many times lately. There's a voice inside my head saying all the time "why don't you die? Why?" and this poem was like a punch in the face. I should be more grateful. I really should.

[@twix8731]

I am struggling too. The voice's don't stop

[@naylachagas3865]

Please, find professional help. Try new things, remember everyday that the world around you is beautiful, but this beauty is somehow linked to your presence. Your life is worth living.

[@InfiniteMind9]

Been there to.. find someone or a feeling to live for. 🙏

[@Mark00747]

Please find Eckhart Tolle (The Power Of Now)

[@lidianemota2781]

I struggled for years too, sometimes it still comes back.. I'm rooting for your staying. Some days can be wonderful and living is a beautiful thing that's full of possibilities. Give it a chance, allow yourself to experience the occasional beauty in the everyday, and if you believe in one, maybe pray to a higher being sometimes. The voices will go away someday, I promise. Much love.

[@Crystal-rj6lt]

The only reason i havent ended it is because someone once told me “If you do, your dog will always wonder why mommy never came home.“

[@rattoota]

My cat is pretty much the only reason im still here

[@sara-rc2hr]

@@rattoota That's great, that's something. If no one told you today, I love you. Please don't give up, it in some ways, definitely gets better. Do the best you can do even if it's minimum. Surviving is hard too. Wishing you happy days and hope. Love, A stranger who cares just like your cat does:)

[@auquiambao807]

Well, same. Having the thought that no one will take care and love my dog the same as I do keeps me sane and stay alive😅

[@xosruxor]

Yep here for my cat & snake always 💖

[@simezimi34]

I care. I hope you're okay.

[@silver997]

“I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me, but saw nothing, but sky in my place.” I almost hung myself one evening. I was about to step off the stool when my dog yelped at the door. She tried to get in, she didn’t know I wasn’t going to be there after. I couldn’t bare to leave my first dog I’ve ever had, alone. I stepped down and opened the door. 6yrs ago. My dog is 7 now.

[@jeffreydarmisco7088]

if you need help go talk to your Friends, family and people you trust, life can be great and will get even better after the pandemic ends so do not waste it and life have a lot of good experiences and memories that are gonna make you think it was all worth it, a lot of people who tried to end their lives remember that they changed their mind and are happy to be alive, if necessary search for help in the internet and if you can afford it call a therapist "ending your life is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" also do not be shy to call for help...

[@hariniobla422]

It’s truly a blessing to have a pet that unconditionally loves you. I’m glad you have her.

[@pankaj2868]

Can I ask you her name if you don't mind?(ur dog's name) Yah That's why everyone believes that pets are so much caring and understanding than humans..

[@mombun1320]

U think she didn't know? Watching animal communicators on tik tok has shown me they know way more than we give them credit for!

[@s3v3n.w0rd2]

You see stories like this and realize, animals are so much more helpful than people sometimes I’m glad your dog saved you and that you’re alive

[@elle0537]

I can't listen to this poem without bawling my eyes out.. like it physically hurts

[@wlther]

i heard about a man who jumped off the golden gate bridge and survived. he regretted jumping the second he did, as he was falling down. he was lucky enough to survive, but i keep wondering how many of the ppl who died felt the same way he did. it rlly stuck with me. i think most of us just want relief from the pain, we feel like we wanna die but if we werent in pain we would still wanna be here. i believe in us, i believe in you reading this. you got this and im proud of you for fighting

[@rakimu6023]

every single last person regretted it. even just a little bit. it's just natural instinct

[@solitary3767]

😟

[@hdajq892ey7]

i just feel like it would be better off it I wasn't there. i don't need a relief from pain I just want to make people happy

[@wlther]

@@hdajq892ey7 i know that feeling.. please stay. i know how real it feels, but there is always, always someone whos happy to have you here, even if they dont say it. i dont even know you but im happy youre here. you gone from this world is never going to be a good thing, you would be missed. theres only one you, which means you bring something into this world even tho you dont know it, and not in a negative way. just by your comment i can tell youre a good person, you think about others, but this wouldnt make people happy. please hold on, you got this. youre gonna meet ppl who make you feel as loved and special as you are. one day at a time alright? im proud of you, and im so happy youre still here

[@hdajq892ey7]

@@wlther thank you so much you're gonna make me cry now

[@aishas-c7948]

I love how supportive this comment section is.

[@NRDM02]

Yeah, I know right... And I don't have any sucidle behaviour but this comment section is making me cry with the tears of happiness... Because it's to supportive... 🥺😭

[@emmakin6178]

Ikr🥺

[@johnmccall7500]

I hope you're being sarcastic, because if not, I'll bet we can figure out how to make you that way! 😉

[@sraddha_loves_bangtan]

Only if people said something nice to me before ending it. I hope you all can hold on. Don't give up like me. I'm a coward, trying to run away. It's better this way really. Maybe nobody will read this, but if you are, hold on. I quit.

[@NRDM02]

@@sraddha_loves_bangtan don't do that... Hold on... You couldn't do that bro... I don't know you and I don't know your problem but please hold on more... You couldn't give up... Like this... Everything will get better just hold on bro.... Please man... Please...........

[@VtheNPC]

Brain: Suicide is the answer, it won't hurt anymore. Heart: But my dog will forever be searching for me.

[@piaj2742]

I love you. Please stay. You are an amazing person and you deserve happiness

[@srso4660]

Please stay and finish out your life's purpose. You are loved and needed here by all ❤️

[@dragonstudioproductions1398]

@@assassin2550 shut up.

[@assassin2550]

@@dragonstudioproductions1398 your life also doesn't matter

[@hehehebhe9965]

@UCm38yfvxJrbvkLJhK8bFgrg 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣r u an ok😑

[@NotoriousBroadcasts]

My mother committed suicide, and left these words in her poetry towards the end, and the family used it on her grave stone; “When we stop, the world goes on without us. This is eternity. This is joy. “ - It was her message to say that the true sense of peace is that we know the world will go on even if we are not here in it, that others will go on to remember us. Edit; I just wanted to come back to this comment and say thank you so much for all of the likes and all of the positive responses. Although I have for a long time come to terms with my own grief, I hope that these words in my experience can bring hope to others who have lived as a survivor. Bless

[@roguegalaxi1]

Oh noo. :(

[@Airhead247]

I wish mine had left a note :)

[@NotoriousBroadcasts]

@@Airhead247 I do not know if it was a note or just her poetry that our family placed on her grave plaque.

[@ralitsadimitrova824]

I'm truly sorry for your loss

[@NotoriousBroadcasts]

@@ralitsadimitrova824 Not a loss really because I was too young to know her but more like an empty space that was never filled.

[@tommybootlegger]

I really hope that whoever needed to hear this right now, heard it.

[@NeilBraun]

I hope so too, and for me, I just did.

[@ourgreatlittlelife-alexand7993]

That person is me..

[@alexjames9948]

I gave my self one month this month to find a reason to keep living if I could I'd kill my self in January... I think I just found my reason keep living because there will be so many thinks I'd miss. I would see my little sister grow up I wouldn't meet someone that would love me I wouldn't get that dog I want next year. This video found me in just the right time were having to put down my sister's dog in 2 days. I hope the future is better

[@ourgreatlittlelife-alexand7993]

@@alexjames9948 *hugs* stay strong, friend. You can do this. I deal with the same things but there is always support even if we don’t see it.

[@NeilBraun]

@@alexjames9948 those are very good reasons, and maybe those you just mentioned wouldn't have you, the person out there who would love you couldn't, nor could the dog even though they are better at it than anyone, and then your sister wouldn't have a sister anymore. This isn't something to make you feel guilty, it's just that it's a huge loss of possibilities, and it's on both sides. I don't really understand life all that well, and I'm honestly not all that good at it but do know one thing and that is it always changes in one way or another. Sometimes it gets better but if you aren't here to experience that then it can't.

[@melikes4515]

When I was a teenager, I used to walk my dog along a lake and every time I did I thought about just walking into the water and drowning myself. Only thing stopping me was my beloved dog. Now, over a decade later I am thankful that I didn't do it. Even though since then, life has never felt the same, always a bit dull? But still, I do find joy in many things in life and want to continue living. Maybe my life is a bit more gray-tinged than it's supposed to be, but it is still a life worth living. Thank you for this beautiful and touching video ❤

[@IAmNotYourProblem]

A few years ago I was suicidal, and I Video called my parents. I didn’t expect to tell them how I felt, i never wanted them to know, I just wanted to talk to them. But eventually it came out: how I hated my job, how I hated myself, how I was being bullied and ignored, how absolutely alone I felt. I said “some days I actually contemplate killing myself.” The look on their face made me immediately regret feeling that way. They looked terrified. Truly scared for me. Their fear scared me, I realized how broken they’d be if I left the world. No parent should have to bury their child. I’ve never even thought about suicide since.

[@SaraGamerz]

@@sophieramati Hey, it's okay. Even if I know nothing about you, they care about you. Even if this is said to everyone who's parent don't love them, it's true. They love you, and they don't want anything wrong to happen to you. They might not understand what you're going through, but you change the world for good just by being here. You're not alone in this world, but someday, I'm hopeful that they'll realize how to help you and make you feel better. I hope you do.

[@de4830]

“no parent should have to bury their child”. it’s so simple but that one line just goes round my head every time it crosses my mind. it doesn’t always stop me but gives me guilt.

[@lucheetah5628]

@@sophieramati hey! I know you don't know me and I dont know you, but please know that there is ALWAYS someone who loves you. There is always someone who's life is worse without you in it. No matter who you are, you have just as much potential as anyone else to do something in someone's life. You are so much more valuable and important than you'll ever know. So just do your best. Stay strong. I know you probably hear that a lot but just allow yourself to be sad, then learn and grow from it. You got this❤🙏🏼

[@chocolatte6312]

@@sophieramati my parents reacts the same way but they add a bit more of insults and slapping but deep down i know they care alot about me and that they probably are in denial and don't know how to act and they probably are blaming and questioning themselves what went wrong. That itself gave me a reason to stay.

[@savannahrose8170]

I can relate to this. This Friday I spilled my thoughts to my mom and her face of fear and grief will always remain with me and be a reminder that she doesn’t want to have bury me

[@SlayByJay]

My friend of 15 years committed suicide yesterday. He was only 29 years old. His older brother died 10 years ago in a car accident, and his younger brother died 5 years ago due to cancer. Their mom lost all 3 of her sons in a 10 year span and none of them made it to 30. I can’t stop crying wondering if there is something I could have done, but on the other hand I’m also happy at the thought of him being with his brothers again and having the most beautiful reunion together. I can just imagine them talking and hugging and messing around together today. I loved them and they were like my brothers. His poor parents… all their kids are gone. I just needed to get this off my chest

[@buddy3635]

Thanks for sharing, and I'm so sorry for your loss. You are a very strong person to confess what happened. How are you doing mentally?

[@stopsatmikey]

I feel so pity that people are facing these things and i can't even help them. I wish i could help even one person who's facing these type of situations

[@CricketRodeo]

I'm so sorry to hear this. So sorry for his parents and for you. Love lives on, longer than the pain.

[@ulastoprak]

Owwww sorry to hear that love. In 10 years my older brother committed suicide. I've lost 3 of my cousins. I've lost 2 of my uncles one with committed suicide other one from cancer. One of my best friend hang himself like a year ago and I am having a anxiety depression and panic attacks now. Having problems with my mental health. I am doing my best to stay strong coz nun of us going to live forever and we need to live a good life in our future. Always trying my best to stay away from the bad thoughts and keep myself positive but when I think about them I get the anxiety depression and suicidal thoughts. When I read your comment here the tears just dropped of my eyes. We all should stay strong and positive

[@bindianabel]

@@ulastoprak i feel you. During the pandemic where me and my family had much more free time than usual, the time we spent together feels unreal. As time goes by, various kinds of news flew past our ears. There is good news like marriage, but there is also bad news like the sudden death of a family member. The many deaths that I heard made me think that none of this was real. Then I realized that we only get to live in this world for a very short time, to soon may be forgotten...

[@Dexter-h4v]

My sister took her life last year. She was only 27 years old. And the greatest sister I could ever have wished for. I wonder if this is what she felt, thought, the day after? Thanks for this video. It really hit home. I miss her so much

[@laurabone6187]

I’m so sorry for your lost. I to lost my beautiful sister to suicide. Not a day goes by where I don’t miss her. It’s true life goes on for the living but it’s never the same. Xxxx

[@hugsforwoozi]

I'm so sorry for your loss❤

[@CarloRossi54523]

She didn’t feel anything the next day

[@julieh2057]

I’m so sorry for your loss

[@mariamarietta91]

It will be okay. Iam here. We are here. We are here.. ❤️

[@Nin10doCentral]

I started hallucinating when I was about nine. I understood the concept of hallucinations, but I was always in prison. Fast forward to about five years later, I had just finished seventh grade, probably the most dramatic and difficult time of my life. I know a friend who’s going through a lot, and I can one hundred percent relate. I hit myself with my lunchbox every single time after lunch because I couldn’t bear to do anything. From the constant racism, to the classes that I felt like I didn’t understand, I spent hours just staying up trying to finish my homework. Here I am now, where it’s almost the end of the summer break, where I have to go through the same thing next year.

[@charliedog9641]

I hope your going better now, or at the very least, still hanging on. It's such a hard time in middle/high school

[@Rainorshine004]

🫂❤

[@daeva7135]

as a person who’s constantly thinking of doing something like this, this really hit. i know nothing lasts forever but it just hurts

[@kyg2396]

Please don't think about it . everything has a solution .just imagine people who have cancer of mortal illness ,they wish to have an extra day .count the things you are greatful for .it could be sight ,waking up every day with ability to see .people who loves us a lot of things ...just take a deep look .

[@cynthianicole1105]

I know it's hard, it's so damn hard, but please don't do it. I swear, someday you are going to leave this black hole. You will see light again, you will feel the rays of sunshine on your skin again, you'll feel the warmth in your heart again. I know life can be shit sometimes, or even more, but I swear the most wonderful thing in life is going to be the moment you'll be laughing, enjoying your life to the fullest and then the sudden realization hitting you that this is the moment you stayed alive for. This is the moment you waited for.

[@daeva7135]

thank you guys! < 3

[@heartofhope77]

I’m glad you shared your feelings with us. Keep hanging in there. I know what it’s like and that’s why I found this video too. But what I also learned from a job I did for a long time was people need people like us to tell our stories so they can tell theirs. They need to hear they are normal. They need the kindness you can give them because you get it what it feels like to hurt. So don’t take that gift away from the world. Stay.

[@TheTechnicolorRobot]

My heart hurts for you. No matter what you my feel or hear or whatever, you are beautiful and of great worth just as you were. One thing I wanted to tell my brother who died by suicide I will tell you now: it doesn't matter worth a damn to me if you're a "productive" human being or achieve a lot or whatever shit can define peoples' worth -- I care about you and your wellbeing simply because you are YOU. You're the youest of yous, and you cannot be replaced. You are wonderfully made -- intricately designed and perfectly loved. My hearts breaks for the pain you suffer, and I pray you experience healing and hope and even joy 💛

[@lanatodorovski3997]

My friend killed himself 3 days ago. He was only 15. I found out the morning later. I was never really close to him but I had so much fun with him, and he was never really open with his darker side. He was always smiling and laughing even though he would sometimes make edgy jokes about suicide, but nothing too much. Although we, his friends, knew he wasn't in a good mental state, we didn't really think it was THIS bad. His closest friends knew he wanted to off himself but never knew when he would do it. The night he did it he climbed on a rooftop of a mall with a friend. Both of them tried to kill themselves. They left a message to others and they quickly figured out what was going on, so they called the police. Meanwhile the girl that went with him chaned her mind. She was telling him not to do it. Then the police came. He just jumped.

[@anshveerbhan3812]

This broke me 🥺

[@mihsoso7172]

...

[@TinaCurry123]

I hope that everyone who knew him, including you, are coping healthily. Dealing with that is horrible.

[@art_ninja3480]

😢 that is heartbreaking...

[@Kai_The_Kai]

We’re never joking It hurts when people think we are

[@izzya7274]

I didn’t start crying until they started talking about their dog. My bubs is the only reason I’m still here

[@trinitymeeuw7410]

Are you taking care of yourself? If you even wanna talk I'm truly here for you

[@jessicainthekitchenrecipes]

You matter so much Izzy ❤️ I'm thinking of you and I'm here for you

[@Beelzebubby91]

Same here. If I didn’t have my family or my pets I would be gone a looooonnnggg time ago

[@shay2166]

same )

[@noorfarishah5486]

same . My cat died last week

[@songtothon_livebetter]

This reminds me of a story I once heard about a man who regretted his suicide attempt the moment he jumped off a bridge. As he was falling, he realized all the things he would miss - the warmth of the sun, the laughter of his children, the taste of his favorite food. It's a tragic reminder to appreciate the beauty of life, even in the midst of pain.

[@blackcat-sp4ej]

I wouldn't say I'm suicidal but everyday I've been have these thoughts of what if i kill myself, or I would simply say ''I rather be dead'' idk I've been feeling really useless lately. Here I am crying to this wow

[@hannahburman5800]

i have the same thing, ive felt so unmotivated and incompetent. sometimes i wonder if it’s worth it, but i know that one day i’ll be grateful for keeping on going. so will you, i promise. we’re gonna make it through this year, whoever you are

[@zoestamsnieder2941]

I feel the same, but we will get through this

[@rachellathem]

i feel the exact same way as you do, and we will get through this together

[@blackcat-sp4ej]

Y’all are so sweet making me cry :( ❤️

[@MJ-se7fm]

You are not useless! You are a product of a world that only shows value in what they deem useful. The world would shine less without you. The sky would darken and tinge grey and the clouds would cry at the loss of such a beautiful human being.

[@nai1729]

“Suicide doesn’t end the chances of life getting worse, it eliminates the possibility of it ever getting any better.” -unknown

[@winterstorms5]

Nothing has ever hit this hard.

[@singleinbav1340]

Thanks

[@SamuelBlack84]

Sometimes, life never gets better no matter how hard you try. It just gets worse

[@serendipity6726]

@@SamuelBlack84 don’t say that... One day, it’ll be better!

[@ansleylobo8042]

@@serendipity6726 we can only hope, but sometimes for some people suicide can give them peace. It would be wrong to tell them to stick around for something that pains then and that committing suicide is bad

[@eternalfrostandsunshine]

It isn't the feeling of wanting to be dead, it's the feeling of not wanting to carry the burden of the pain anymore, knowing that this plane of existence isn't my home, knowing I did the best with what I was given, I played the hand I was given. Yet to everyone that mattered I was never enough

[@fancydeer]

you're enough to someone.

[@eternalfrostandsunshine]

​@fancydeer oh how I wish that were actually true, stuck in a storm always that I'm drowning in from the abuse and pain, , ,

[@ananya808]

Exactly.

[@hannahdowns6154]

I don't know you, but you're enough to me and I love you because you're a fellow human being just trying to survive. One of these days you'll not only survive, but thrive.

[@Ollyve]

You don't have to be enough for anyone but you, and if you give your best and people don't recognize it or is not enough for them that's not a you problem, that's their.

[@evaphillips2102]

“With my brother, who once believed in unicorns but now sits at his desk at school trying desperately to believe that I still exist.” Absolutely broke me. I couldn’t hold it together anymore. Anytime I consider giving up I just think about what I’d be putting my family through and then I just can’t do it. That would be such an easily avoidable pain.

[@Morganne]

This is incredible.

[@Riley-pm6dy]

Same

[@asteroid435]

i was 13, i never expected to ever make it to 15 or even 14. I'm 17 now. I'm still here. I'm still here. I'm still here.

[@_R.e.m.i_]

Thts a fighter right there. If u can survive all of those thoughts and feelings and loneliness and hard times All by yourself Trust me, NTH can break u 👍💖 Dk u but I’m proud of u, thanks. Thanks for being alive, it’s truly making a difference.

[@zii3955]

Thanks for being alive, darling. I'm so proud of you.

[@eskaywai]

the video made me tear up but this comment made me break down. i'm so proud of you, lovely human, thank you for being here. i am turning 17 tomorrow and i feel the same.

[@charaoharathecowboy]

I know how it feels. And I'm just glad that we can still observe the beauty of this world and enjoy small and big things, when we thought we wouldn't even make it to this day.

[@beaniesintheclouds]

I was also 13. I also never expected to make it farther than 14. I’m also 17, and still here. Still here. We’re still here. I’m proud of you. You keep going, pal, and I will too. We’ll try our best.

[@Psych2go]

This is a really beautiful piece. Thanks for building awareness on this topic and showing what life could be when we appreciate the little things we do have access to.

[@minjomighty7871]

As someone who is growing up in a generation where depression and suicidal thoughts are as common as trees in a forest, I agree that this topic is something super important that needs to be talked about more because there are so many people that need to see videos like this, and videos like yours Psych2Go (yeah, I'm a big fan, keep it up!). As someone who has been struggling with suicidal thoughts for around 10 years, this piece was actually quite touching to me. I honestly think they should show it in schools because people around my age (17) really need to see stuff like this as it gives a whole different perspective and makes you really appreciate what you take for granted. Also just to fanboy a bit, your vids are super entertaining, I binge them sometimes when they get recommended to me. If you see this, I hope you're having a great day!

[@Zen-bh4zs]

i love your vids! :D

[@areleve5479]

you saved me 💜 I am eternally grateful

[@myatse6296]

Oh my god hi! I love your videos, they help me a lot and I bet many others think the same :)

[@finniewolfhard7049]

Hiiii Psych2Go thanks for making amazing videos which help us a lot ❤️ I agree with how beautiful this masterpiece is, it makes me feel a bit more hopeful to stay

[@captainsaumya]

I always come back to this, Whenever it get gets recommended-I watch it. Sometimes better, other times worse, I watch it and feel the progree I have made, forward or backward. Today, tears didn't fell, Today I finally commented on this. It has been four years from when I first started this cycle. It always makes it way back to me.

[@lunaticpng]

Love how strangers in KZbin comment sections are more caring than most of our parents.

[@purple_genius8730]

😢

[@Hp15023]

And that just broke my heart how our own parents don’t understand us , they act like we are the one who is creating all this thoughts just to gain attention

[@GoddessChristinaRose]

Indeed💔

[@lukecohen9833]

@@GoddessChristinaRose I agree sad but true and I will kill myself

[@peachy8565]

@@Hp15023 My mother yelled at me when I told her how I was feeling. Albeit, I told her at the wrong time, when she was already upset with me for losing my stupid invisilign which I hated. But still, it reminds me of how even she won't care.

[@sahilsk-hl1fe]

The hurt in this is palpable enough to make the listeners cry

[@solo_infinite5313]

I agree😭

[@SpookyPookster]

I am sobbing 😭 damn got me

[@drehdang7209]

Yeah, totally. Definetely. T_T

[@muskaan3534]

😶🙌

[@sejcai]

not me reading this while crying 👩‍🦼

[@larissarilling1928]

“I hope there are days when your coffee tastes like magic, Your playlist makes you dance, Strangers make you smile, And the night sky touches your soul. I hope that you fall in love with being alive again.” (unfortunately i dont know the author of this piece (edit: someone said it’s by brooke hampton) but i think it’s really beautiful. When i first found it, it was exactly what i needed to hear. And maybe it’s what someone else needs to hear, too. Stay save, everybody.)

[@Maryam-sn2mz]

Beautiful quote, thank you! I had to search it, it's Brooke Hampton

[@easy_breezylessons]

That was beautiful, thanks for sharing 💖

[@denisemezynski8014]

That is also a beautiful poem, thanks fur sharing! 💖

[@ang3licfire843]

I did thank you 💞🌹😪💔🩸

[@dimitra8569]

how... how can i fall in love with being alive again, when i never truly have in the first place?

[@daehv]

Commenting now because its been sometime since ive recovered myself. I lost my uncle, then my brother 2 years ago. I felt broken already but it had felt too much. It wasnt long after when i would just lay down after work and stare at the ceiling depressed that i had come across this video. It tore at me because of how much my own thoughts that kept me from doing something terrible aligned with the words from this video. It helped me push myself to move forward and actually live. If you're struggling in life, things will get better eventually, but lying around and doing nothing won't be the cause of it. Never do something that is impossible to take back.

[@monolithrose1945]

I had a close family member kill himself. I still remember the sobs of his mother, how his father sat there and stared at the floor with an empty, depressed look. I remember tearfully having to explain to my 6 year old brother that his favorite cousin wasn’t coming back. I remember the effort we all put in to make sure his sister didn’t learn about it until we could say it gently. I remember my usually poker faced dad shed tears. I remember his birthday a few months later, when his favorite song played on the radio and I had to pull over to cry. I used to have the same thoughts, but when this happened...man it was a real slap of reality. I can’t put my family through that. I can’t make the people who care about me suffer.

[@jeffreydarmisco7088]

Continue being strong, do not give up, always give yourself another chance and some more years get help with people you know and therapy

[@shebalimmugs7896]

Pls don't make me feel guilty for trying

[@felisasepulveda8753]

I CAME TO THIS VIDEO BECAUSE 5 DAYS AGO MY DAUGHTER TOOK HER LIFE.I KNOW SHE DIDNT WANT TO.I KNOW SHE REALLY DIDNT WANT US TO GO THRU THIS GRIEF.BUT IT WAS THE ONLY WAY SHE KNEW TO STOP THE DEMON INSIDE HER HEAD.ONLY WAY HER PAIN COULD STOP.JESUS KEEP MY GIRL SAFE AND SECURE AND LOVED TILL MOMMY MEETS U AGAIN BABYGIRL.😢😢😢😢😢😢😢💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@felisasepulveda8753]

@@shebalimmugs7896 NO WE DONT WANT ANYONE TO FEEL GUILTY.WE ONLY WANT THEM TO KNOW WE CARE WE LOVE WE WANT U TO BE ALIVE.🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@felisasepulveda8753]

@headz THANK U SO MUCH MEANS ALOT.🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏SHE WAS DOING WELL BEFORE THANKSGIVING CAME.THAN SHE GOT SCAMMED BY A PERSON ONLINE.FROM THERE IT TOOK A TOLL ON HER.THERE WAS NO COMING BACK FROM IT.😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

[@Love_Yourself4830]

I lost my 13-year-old daughter to suicide six months ago. As a form of self-therapy and means to try and help other people, I've been creating videos in which I explore nature and narrate my journey with grief. Content like this is also tremendously helpful. Thank you for taking the time to share this with the world.

[@ebpatton]

God bless you.

[@InvitationToHers]

Im 13 as well; I’m so, so sorry for your loss. I pray for you and your family. I hope you can rest knowing she’s in a better place, now

[@mookiess]

i'm so sorry, i can't imagine the grief that you've felt, and the pain she must have felt to do so. I was in a similar place only years ago, not knowing if i was gonna make it past high school. Just a few months ago i turned 18, something i never thought would have been possible at the time. But the pain still lingers and i still continue to fall into these sad spells that makes my life feel unbearable at times, but seeing the grief from comments like these remind me why i've kept moving on. I hope you're able to find your own peace, and just know that you've probably saved a life with your videos.

[@kikaha56]

❤️

[@leemon5557]

Condolences to your daughter. And, I just want to say that the Lord Jesus is our hope in this world. Not anything. Not something. Just Him. And I want to emphasize that because Jesus saved me. He saved me. And He will do so to other people to. To you, who is reading. Trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, for He lived, died, and rose again for our sins! Whoever believes in Him shall have eternal life!

[@thegoodfellow5]

My big sister committed suicide about a month and a half ago and as someone who's struggled with mental health, this piece really hit hard. You got me all choked up and teary.

[@_JoeyPoey]

sorry for your loss, I hope you get through this

[@mrnegatively5125]

Sorry for your loss

[@lukecohen9833]

sorry for your loss

[@cbjones538]

So sorry for your loss. Another poem that helps is one called "The Day You Died Because You Wanted To."

[@lukecohen9833]

@@cbjones538 what's that one

[@Tulip__]

Sometimes I just wonder how I will never be able explain to anyone why every now and then I sit straight and listening to it on a loop.

[@jackmemphis7775]

I totally understand you...did the same today all day...take care

[@tattoomesam]

As a survivor and have been in that cold dark pit searching for an escape from this miserable experience… just pause… think of ur loved ones finding ur body. The last time I tried I felt my lips wrapped around the cold barrel. It tasted like a salty AA battery. In that moment I thought about my mom finding me. I cried and considered myself a failure once again. I woke up on my bathroom floor, still cold and the floor tile left an imprint on my face. I sold the gun I owned and started over. I managed to live another twenty years and got married and have a beautiful baby boy that is my universe. He was my reason for existing. Well it’s January 21, 2024 today, and my mom just died yesterday. And somehow KZbin recommended me this video. Thank you mom for being there when I needed you most. I know I wasn’t the greatest son in the world but I live each day trying to be a good father.

[@dliap98]

I'm sorry to hear about your mum. and I'm glad you're still here💜

[@alganger]

I’m so sorry for your lost🙏🏻

[@newton7432]

Sorry for your mum

[@erwandupuis5844]

❤❤❤❤

[@eiame77]

Stay strong friend and one day she will welcome you into heaven to stand beside her once again.

[@thepurplepalace85]

This is BEAUTIFUL!!

[@kamthomas1681]

This poem really is palpable On a completely unrelated note, feel like i see you everywhere...i saw ur comment on a cari cakes video not too long ago too lol! I hope everything is going well with your art, its beautiful :)

[@illneas]

^^

[@nvastaar1081]

The Purple Palace I- I love your videos 😔❤️

[@purebliss2669]

The only way to receive true happiness is to be born again.Jesus loves you and is coming back to earth soon.You need to repent.Please believe and spread the word...

[@bellabrown5274]

Jesus loves you all I hope you accept Him and repent He wants you to come to Him, it’s time to accept Him :)

[@dwita777]

i started crying uncontrollably at the brother part and couldn’t stop. i feel so guilty abt having suicidal thoughts i never ever want to put my little brother through that oh my god. this is such a beautiful piece and i know will never fail to make me emotional

[@_guitaRJ]

There's nothing for you to feel guilty about for having suicidal thoughts. In fact, you should feel pride in yourself for having those thoughts but not giving into them. You display great selflessness in resisting those thoughts for the sake of your brother and other people that care about you and love you.

[@starbéreux]

My baby brother, sister, and mom are the only people who kept me from committing. I imagine the pain they would feel if I went through with it and I would feel guilty if I would pass my pain off to them. Not because I think it’s cowardly, but because I could not imagine how I would affect their lives, and the lives of their potential future children as well. I’m still fighting it, but I feel much better today than I did last year.

[@queenofthefish]

I also cried abou this part, though I don't have suicidal thoughts anymore it reminds me of a time when I did and I'm glad that I'm still here so I know my little brothers will never have to go through it.

[@lukecohen9833]

@@starbéreux I know my friends and family will be sad but I can't keep living here I just have to go

[@starbéreux]

@@lukecohen9833 Hey, don’t say that. You still have a purpose in this world. You are loved. I advice that you seek help.🙏🏽

[@JJS70707]

Such an abstract way of telling the audience that they want us to stay a little longer. I love it.

[@FloatyyBrain]

When they started talking about the dog, it broke my heart. My dog is the main reason I’m still here and I just, damn that hurt.

[@tobylender4091]

if you need help go talk to your friends, family and people you trust, life can be great and will get even better after the pandemic ends so do not waste it and life have a lot of good experiences and memories that are gonna make you think it was all worth it, a lot of people who tried to end their lives remember that they changed their mind and are happy to be alive, if necessary search for help in the internet and if you can afford it call a therapist "ending your life is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" also do not be shy to call for help

[@palemink]

@Diella shalom Akimana Stop please y'all are annoying I swear. If your religion gives you solace that doesn't mean that it'll for everyone else. If there's a god, then he couldn't care less really

[@ducks.s]

@@palemink there is a god who loves all of us even people like you. And he cares so much. :)

[@palemink]

@@ducks.s You see, I have nothing against religious people. Just please be civil and don't force your religion on me everytime I'm being suicidal etc. If praying helps you, that doesn't mean that it'd help everyone else.

[@morganie_0]

@@palemink no one was forcing it upon you. They are stating things. True things. Instead of saying Jesus loves you to make you more comfortable, we Love you.

[@anyafrench439]

Completely honest here. Some days are so shit when I say “I don’t leave my bed” I don’t leave my bed at all. Not for the bathroom not for food not for anything at all, I just want to be dead. Some therapists have helped but not much the thoughts always come back. I’m so happy this came up on my timeline on shit a shitty morning- I might go and decorate for Christmas instead of tying a noose today. Thank you so much for letting me and my family have one more good day together- and for the first time in a while I want to have more good days with them. Thanks

[@carac3517]

I'm glad you stayed. Keep fighting!!

[@Selam-fr4lf]

There’s an alternate life you wish you were living. I dare you to live it

[@evasola-sole6937]

you will make it through this. you have so many more people to meet and beautiful things to see. everyone is so proud of you. keep going, you got this!

[@iondiamanti]

It's not easy but it gets better i promise!! I am happy for you🤍🤍🤍

[@rainbowunicorn007]

I've been in the exact same spot for weeks now. im even losing weight bc I don't leave my bed for anything this sucks

[@moo.6359]

"The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself..." *"But I couldn't finish what I started"* I dont know man, those lyrics get me every time

[@jojobarz541]

wait what does it mean when she says she couldn’t finish what she started? i don’t really get that line

[@moo.6359]

@@jojobarz541 I dont know the exact meaning, cause I didnt write the poem. I would guess it would mean that after seeing the sorrow in her parents, and realizing the good in the world. She tried to "unkill herself" but found out she couldn't fix the sorrow and grief she had brought upon the world. This may not be accurate, but it's my interpretation :>

[@jojobarz541]

@@moo.6359 ohh thank you for explaining. that’s a really good interpretation🖤

[@caitlindavies4675]

@@jojobarz541 I think it might mean that she couldn't finish the rest of her life. That she wasn't able to get married and have a family and complete her life goals. That's just how I see it.

[@jiinavex1890]

IMM SOBBING

[@proddity9730]

This video saved my life. Seriously, I was in a really bad place and this masterpiece convinced me to get help. Thank you.

[@im_just_vidu]

It's sad how much I come here every time I want to end things. I'm afraid I'll end up regretting it, so I come here to remind myself that I can't go back if I try it. I hope everyone will find their own happiness. If you're reading this, don't give up. Cuz I'm trying my best to not give up too. Let's win this together.

[@user-uh6vy4mo3j]

m.kzbin.info/www/bejne/qpazeaycfrdmga8 💗💗💗

[@people4peace999]

A MEN brother

[@freebornajibode7654]

❤️❤️❤️

[@danutasilman2327]

I am trying... but I'm tired. Let's see...

[@freebornajibode7654]

@@danutasilman2327 Hold on. You're a light, stay ❤️