The Real Reason Why So Many Black Women Are Single?

#blackwomen #dating #relationship
In this video we are discussing black women and dating and relationships! We have had a video about this topic almost every year and it always sparks great conversation. Dating in 2024 is not for the weak but black women seem to face many obstacles when it comes to settling down. Let us know what you think in the comments!
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[@success2471]

The truth is bitter. Not all but a lot of black women are in denial and are not honest with the part they play in the process. How do most of them treat black men. With disrespect and drama.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

The disrespect goes both way. Both men and women can do better.

[@bethmcgill5944]

And how do black men treat them.....that's the question!

[@jayeverything]

The problem is black women. But as soon as you say that you'll get the "but the men though". And thus the problem will never ever be solved. Black women are above criticism don't want to change and h8 stats and facts. Because compared to BM, BM are more married that bw earn more money and all doing fine.

[@blubeard6914]

@@EJIMANnenaNgozi you asked “did black women fail you” then continue to put the blame on men. You’re part of the problem you’re failing bw right now by not speaking about women’s issues. Your mothers and each other and the choices you make. Men wouldn’t be an issue if you carry yourself a certain way with grace, femininity, and being an inspiration to a man. Men would move mountains for you. But you attack us. Make us the target of every problem black women have instead of looking inside yourselves and doing your own work.

[@kiarashontel6558]

You’re right the truth is bitter. However, and I don’t condone disrespect. But the majority rules and facts are proven in society that. Black women alone according to the domestic violence statistics either dies, or suffers the most in relationships and marriages from a black man. Whether it’s emotional, physical, financial,mental abuse or even death by black-men alone. Regardless, of demographics, or economic status. This is a bit misogynistic and prejudice towards black women. When there’s a cause and effect to every thing.Black women aren’t going around killing black men daily but black men are for unhinged behaviors and beliefs. Black men have an opened dating palette to non black women and you hear of stories of these non colored women dogging black men out. But black men would rather take their L in silence and still find a way to shift blame and accusing black women for being the most disrespectful group of women. The western culture of black men has never respected black women alone throughout history look a your purple, blue pill popping, counterparts on these podcasts, through hip hop, social media and etc.

[@misstownes]

I’m so mad I didn’t get the notification 😒. But yes I have notice that my White counterparts are married and married to their Equals. I work in healthcare as a Nurses and they are alllll married, all shapes, sizes, ages and stages. They are married! And the hardly any of the black nurses are married. And just some/very few of the old school black nurses are married. Very few.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Aww so upset you missed it! Make sure your notifications are on. Yes we cant keep ignoring it- there is a obvious pattern and there is something to it!

[@misstownes]

I think future conversations should consist of solutions. The pickings are slim. Dating outside our race? Marry the man who wants you even though his circumstances are not idea (such as live in another state, already has kids and can’t move out of state, health lifestyle doesn’t align with yours etc.) And I think AD and Clay end result from love is very telling of the state of the black dating seen? So much to discuss! ❤

[@astoldbymuriel103]

I don't think the problem is black women, the problem is black culture. Black men see marriage as a burden. For some reason they are all so turned off on marriage. To be honest It's not like Black marriages were the epitome of success in the past. When you sit down and explain the benefits of marriage to black men it's almost like a light bulb goes off in their head. On the other head other cultures push marriage and the men understand how marriage gives them a leg up in society and it's almost a societal norm for them.

[@emexokezie7796]

Very good point, and you made it from observation and reality... Black Nurses, as my mum says are a no-go for men... I married one, now I know!

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

I hear this alot about nurses. Can you explain why this is a common belief/perception?

[@bradleepitt7409]

11:36 Yes, there’s more to life than just relationships, but it’s clear we’re having issues in that area. We were designed to have a companion. The issues have been heightened in recent years and I think this is why this is such a hot topic right now.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Yes but the way we discuss it is important. Too much content is focused on pointing fingers vs being accountable.

[@ogolden8315]

The thing is American BM are also the least married out of all other male groups. So, it makes sense that American/ADOS BW will also be least married. If the blk men are not getting married, how would the blk women be married? Men are still the ones who ask women to marry them. BW (ADOS) who want to marry, need to be open to dating outside their group. Also…. The correct stat is “out of the about 30% of BM who are married, 80-85% of those BM are married to BW. Let us also factor in that lots of mixed-race BW are counted as just “Black”. BM also date/marry out at 2-3x rate of BW.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

You raised a good point. Thanks for watching!

[@consciousliving1061]

not much to marry out here in the us and western countries that is

[@jayeverything]

Who wants to marry a combative woman who wears hair from another race and looks down on you 🤔

[@dicerevo]

BW do not require marriage. When I was dating I noticed that black women were quick to sleep with you and never discussed marriage/ kids. But other women… they wanted to know what the plan was from the beginning.

[@ogolden8315]

@@dicerevo In those cultures “marriage or getting into rlsps for marriage was part of the culture/society.” For the ADOS BC that system broke down or degenerated for a large part of the community. There are minority sub-groups/class in the ADOS community where marriage is still required for BOTH men and women before kids (although the men still get more latitude for “slip ups”).

[@UnderRatedBeauty88]

Great topic , as an American black women I have noticed that most African and Caribbean women that I meet are usually married and more family oriented. American culture is a little different from African/Caribbean cultures. It’s unfortunate that American black women were forced to be independent and neglected as opposed to other cultures. The Single black American woman epidemic is intentional propaganda to say the least.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Wow great analysis. The American Black woman has def been conditioned to be more independent but as we mention in the live its usually a result of person pain, abandonment, and mistreatment from fellow black men. We pray it gets better.

[@UnderRatedBeauty88]

@@EJIMANnenaNgozi it’s just sad that too many American black women never had the luxury to rest and be provided for by a man .The men don’t really seem to care enough to change that narrative. Don’t get me wrong , I understand that African women and Caribbean women have to work hard to survive in their countries as well but at least family is still intact in other countries.

[@ogolden8315]

The thing is American BM are also the least married out of all other male groups. So, it makes sense that American/ADOS BW will also be least married. If the blk men are not getting married, how would the blk women be married? Men are still the ones who ask women to marry them. BW (ADOS) who want to marry, need to be open to dating outside their group. Also…. The correct stat is “out of the about 30% of BM who are married, 80-85% of those BM are married to BW. Let us also factor in that lots of mixed-race BW are counted as just “Black”. BM also date/marry out at 2-3x rate of BW.

[@naijalink5541]

Wonderful topic ladies. You go Ngozi 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 conditional indeed. We have a choice both ways. An undisciplined person is one of the worst people to be with. Anything goes with them

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Thank you! At the end of the day cheating is a CHOICE. Too many men use biology as an excuse. They lack discipline.

[@annlulu29]

The bellyaching over women leaving relationships but not wanting to get into the reasons why annoys me. It reminds me of the time I went browsing through a MGTOW (men going their own way) forum (whose owner gave his life to the lord and revamped the forum) and coming across a thread where a user complained about his girlfriend breaking up with him and moving out to her dad's. And apparently he did know or understand why. Two pages later, he admits he has a drinking issue and he struck his girlfriend which why she left him and her dad told him to stay away. The responses were: seek God for your issues, the dad's doing his job, repent, stay away from her. He knew why the relationship ended and played dumb. I refuse to believe the majority of these men don't know why their relationships end. They're just upset that it ended and want to save face.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Oh wow that is interesting. I think some people may think their issues aren’t that bad and can be worked on.

[@keptbygrace6221]

@ 42 min - great comment on BM culture. For example, one of my grandmothers had a $$hotg*n wedding. She got pregnant so my grandfather married her. They learned to love each other, had 2 more children, and were married over 40 years. It was not always easy bc they were working class black people in the 1950s, but they made it work. I personally think we should bring this back. Maybe then, men and women, would think more carefully about who they sleep with and have children with.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Exactly! We need to think more carefully for sure.

[@user-on6xc8dk4z]

Number one HAIR!

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

??

[@kelechukwuohakamma2545]

I am watching from Lagos Nigeria

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Thanks for watching!

[@maloishwilson]

This is the first time I've ever seen one of your videos. You seem really sincere in solving the problem, but I'm in my 60's, and for 40, years I have been saying, "How can I meet someone, who will not say hello"? Miss Ali, wrote her book in 1989, and since then the problem has gotten worse. Today you don't even go in a store or any where you see a BW, with the; wig, nails, etc... when you see them from a distance, you don't even go in the store, you say to yourself "I'll come back later". I hope the best for your channel, but for the problem to start to fix it self, you BW, have to learn how to smile, because ask yourself, who wants to be around a woman like that.

[@MrMakemusicmike]

A caricature of a woman.

[@michaelmayojr.2730]

Women leave relationships and marriages 80% of time most men don’t leave women y’all leave us statistics tell the truth

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Yes we do but there is usually a reason. But many men arent ready for that conversation.

[@edenhome9057]

​@EJIMANnenaNgozi I have noticed on the thread that you tend to be very defensive as opposed to asking more questions to continue the discussion. Maybe that's one of the problems with black women.

[@jayeverything]

Every time a woman does something degenerate we always have to look at why and what drove her to do that. They allergic to accountability.

[@dicerevo]

@@EJIMANnenaNgozilesbian marriage has the highest rate of divorce whilst gay marriage has the lowest rate. So assuming men are the reason how do you explain the rate of divorce amongst lesbian relationships?

[@researchtwins]

Arrange marriages for the youths…it’s the last hope.

[@Peanut12883]

WIGS / BRAIDS / EXSTENTIONS: bw better hope & pray the hair business never crashes. 99.8 %

[@jayeverything]

Black men have said for decades we don't like the fakeness. And only recently I understood they don't do it for us, they do it for brad. They don't care what BM think or say they just blame BM for their poor outcomes

[@wilsonailen5015]

Lots of Indian women are highly educated but they marry and in most cases provide for their men. It's lack of respect and a break down of culture

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Black women also provide for their men

[@emexokezie7796]

With all due respect to ya'll my fellow igbo sisters, your notion of black men being responsible for the baby mama culture is downright disrespectful and utterly false! I listen to the common sense you both generally make but hell no.. This one is a pure unadulterated untruth. I live here in London, I'll use it as an example.. The amount of BW I know that would have the child and pander to the system and do away with the dad is quite beyond reproach.. This is a very common occurrence in the black community in the western world... So please, feminism aside, let's not help the enemy of both of us fulfil the evil agenda against us for not only are we slipping into the bottomless freefall but we're allowing time to slip away into entertainment of this unnecessary gender war!

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Black men are not 100% responsible but responsible yes? It takes two to tango. There are women who “do away” with their childs father but I dont believe its the majority. Many men are not interested in fathering children and lets make that clear.

[@chekwubeokoli4816]

​@@EJIMANnenaNgoziwhy should lady allow herself to get pregnant when he knew that man has not marry her yet. There's family planning

[@mlionea]

the second from left is not african

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

Im not sure but we refer to them as Black women and she is black. Thanks for watching.

[@casspeterson320]

With no family structure Dad and mom in home it affects everything that is why most black peoples our poor no home owner ship

[@blubeard6914]

Because your single mothers low key hated you and saw you as competition, and the reason why her life sucked.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

We all didnt have single mothers. And the ones who were usually werent by choice. The term is used to shame women but last time I checked men make women single mothers.

[@aarongray1981]

@@EJIMANnenaNgoziwomen and men make single mothers not just men. Let’s be honest like my grandmother used to say, there’s too many “oops babies out here”. Meaning unplanned unprotected sex with no birth control. Both sides are to blame and I’m sure the majority of the time they were never married🤷🏿‍♂️

[@blubeard6914]

@@EJIMANnenaNgozi 80% of us did, and if you had both you’re in the minority, so kudos but we can’t focus on yall. Yeah it takes two to make a kid but 80% of the time single mothers are raising children. I didn’t say absentee fathers are great either. They just as trash as the single mothers. Unless the mother is to blame for it which happens quite often too. Then they raise their daughters and will compete with them instead of teaching them how to be wives. Or they’ll tell them they don’t need a man because the mom hasn’t healed yet and passes her curse on to her children. And they’re all single by choice don’t be stupid. We all have choices to make and they chose to be single mothers instead of wives.

[@blubeard6914]

@@EJIMANnenaNgozi I’m married too. Are you?

[@Peanut12883]

What’s y’all plan if the hair business crashes? I know, it’s the end of your career / future. That’s how bad it is.

[@EJIMANnenaNgozi]

boy byeeee