The Rise of Skywalker Makes Sense, Actually | EFAP Highlight

[@UltraGalaxyify]

So, according to the Star Wars Wiki, it turns out that Rey's father is actually a clone of Palpatine. So it's STILL unconfirmed that Palps ever palpated a woman's palpable polyp palace.

[@JohnCena-i1d]

In legends wasnt Mara jade his mistress or something 🤮

[@UltraGalaxyify]

@JohnCena-i1d No. She was an "Emperor's Hand" basically a hatchet-man who took orders directly from, and answered directly to, the Emperor himself

[@jonsnowight9510]

"Polyp palace" seems a bit cancerous

[@crimsonpotemkin]

I completely forgot that Screen Crush's interpretation of TROS is that Leia dies just to get a kill-assist on her own son. That alone is funnier than some modern comedies.

[@supermcspotty]

Yeah legit I thought kylo getting stabbed killed Leia.

[@gabrieldevoogel6225]

@@supermcspottythat’s how me and my dad thought it was, probably because my dad knows EU and that was the answer that made sense

[@stanleyharno4534]

LMFAO, that last point was a joke in E;R's video: "Five planets of the Republic getting obliterated wasn't enough to convince everyone to get off their ass and fight the first order, but a bootycall from Lando?"

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

That'd be like if the Japanese somehow acquired nukes and used it on Pearl Harbour then turns up on the shores of the western American continent and the US doesn't give a shit, but Roosevelt gets up from his chair miraculously does.

[@CrabTastingMan]

@@RhysCallinan-cq5re Japanese were trying harder than Nazis to get nukes right till the end of the war trying to develop 2 nukes, 😮trying to buy time by extending its germ bombing of Capitalist China to California as well to buy time to finish their Japanese nukes. Japan taught everyone that their emperor was a living god and all must blow themselves up or die fighting with bamboo spears so they can get 72 virgins in heaven- I mean go to Zen Pure Land paradise. 😂😂Japan was fighting Chinese capitalists and allying with Chinese Communists. They are the sole reason communism was not stamped out in Asia, while Asian capitalists were on the brink of stamping them out when Japanese fascists kept bombing them with WMDs like chemical and biological bombs developed through rampant human experimentation. Ultimately, exactly like why half of Europe was communist against their will for 45+ years. Ppl like Fan Hannian were invited from time to time to Japanese consulate in Shangahai to trade military intel on Chinese capitalists. Because this, and the WMD Also 1937 Japan’s bombing of USS Panay and faking an apology commanding 1000s of schoolgirls to write letters implying accusing Japan of murders = how dare you accuse innocent schoolgirls (who grew up on the blood of dozens of other countries)? while promoting the officer who gave the order to kill Americans.

[@coltonwhite2518]

​@@RhysCallinan-cq5reIt's even worse than that. Lando was a card shark and two bit hustler before winning control of cloud city Bespin via gambling. This would be more like if some random asshole in Las Vegas that won a coal mine in a bet got on the radio and managed to convince every state east of California to fight the Japanese where pearl harbor didn't cut it llmao.

[@giulizpaviz6381]

Disney: *buys the Saw franchise* Random police officer: "Somehow John Kramer is still alive"

[@nedia8259]

John surviving is an easier buy

[@dodojesus4529]

And he got his BRAIN removed

[@mikzpwnz_3199]

And every single "victim" somehow survived every single deathtrap. Even the ones that the plot relied on being dead.

[@nedia8259]

@@mikzpwnz_3199 well you see, John wanted to give them a second chance, noones ever really game overed

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

And there're a hundred clones that get wiped out in the next movie Resident Evil style.

[@HectorLopez0217]

TROS makes perfect sense if you pretend it’s what you want

[@chaoticgoodcreations947]

Absolutely iconic EFAPer line.

[@ILoveFunAndTheWorld]

But if you close your eyes…

[@happynihilist2573]

And see how you feel

[@captainuseless2120]

@@ILoveFunAndTheWorld Does it almost feel like nothing changed at all...

[@oscargruber8582]

Rookie Mistake by the right wing podcast, obviously

[@Oi-fo1wt]

“When did Palpatine have a kid?” You could say, a few orders after Order 66, he thereafter executed Order 69….

[@trashfire9641]

That's not how babies are made... 🤭

[@c-puff]

​@@trashfire9641 not with that attitude

[@thevoicesaregettinglouder16]

In the comics, he straight up just planted force fetuses in random women using his force powers

[@redgeoblaze3752]

@@trashfire9641 The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some may consider to be unnatural.

[@OneDapperFrog]

@@thevoicesaregettinglouder16 Da fuck?

[@666lupine666]

Screen Crush is such a gem, remember when he claimed that Wanda entertained her hostages 'with magical shows'? Peppridge farm remembers

[@SilvaF0X]

"Just clap you Seal" -Hollywood

[@robertbeisert3315]

The same way certain wooden ships were created to give Africans free cruises

[@dodojesus4529]

Oh yeah, the unironic pro slavery arguments

[@sqwalnoc]

WHERE IS HE GETTING ANY OF THIS FROM?? the dude has written his own movie in his head

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

The only canon he has is headcanon. Dude is literally making shit up that makes the crazies look normal.

[@reddeaddude2187]

Sidious: I have been every shitty idea... Snoke: ...you have ever heard... Vader: ... inside your head!

[@antoniomosley4961]

Yeah, it's the same people that believe the holocaust happen. They are making their own holocaust and how it could have happen but it's not cannon, it's not what official records say. It's same here, they are making arguments what they think could work or using some unofficial sources. Noo, use the movie and explain it to me how are those things possible.

[@genebaker511]

In one of the comics, Darth Vader actually visited Exegol and saw Palpatine's clones and never told Luke about it.

[@kinterviewer9592]

It's really funny when you think about it. That somehow, the comics and novels of Disney "cannon" has at times are WORSE then the actual sequel trilogy.

[@krishnakantbhatt9947]

Epic line, Mr. Longman She died to cleanse his soul. Luke died saying "lol, you thought I was real..."

[@EndThusIAm]

"How did this happen in the sequels? Well here's a clip from past films that had no inkling of being a set up for films made decades later!"

[@mala6238]

It makes sense. It MUST make sense. MUST.

[@Wyzai]

"also the scene contradicts our point but if we cut it in half it doesn't."

[@rocknatex5013]

Gotta love the hypocrisy of Disney Star Wars. Saying that Anakin *wasn't* the chosen one because Ray *was* makes no sense considering how much Disney Star Wars wants Clone Wars to be canon. 'Cause guess what? There's an entire arc in CW where Anakin is *confirmed* to be the Force's chosen one. So how can *that* be canon in a world where Anakin *isn't* actually the chosen one? Pick one, Disney!

[@predatorking3131]

I doubt the folks who wrote TFA,TLJ, or TROS even took a glance at TCW tbh, remember "kill the past" after all, lol

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

Which way, western man?

[@mordirit8727]

Ryan and JJ didn't even watch the 6 movies and you think they watched Clone Wars?

[@rocknatex5013]

@@mordirit8727 Touché 😂

[@David_the_Psalmist]

Disney wants Clone Wars to be canon because its fan base is extremely dedicated. If Clone Wars sticks around, so will they... or so they think.

[@christopherroutt4937]

Sad fact is KOTOR 1 provided a perfect way for the Emperor to produce ships and arms quickly. It would be quite cool if Exogol was a Starforge that had been operational since the Emperor returned.

[@Keeki95]

Modern audience no smart. Big factory no cool. More big ships. More planets go boom.

[@barrybend7189]

Also Kotor is a big no no as they already ruined Malachor 5 from Kotor 2. Announced the High Republic before the announcement of the Kotor remake. Disney specifically Kathleen Kennedy hate what was created before.

[@gavinfreenone6626]

​@@barrybend7189 good, they can keep their hands off of anything kotor related

[@yung_wise5861]

Don't you dare try to act as if riding horses on a spaceship that is capable of 360° turning and spinning isn't the most neanderthal thing we've all seen

[@BigBroTejano]

I mean Neanderthals didn’t have domesticated horses to ride. So technically no.

[@lordofthepizzapie9319]

​@@BigBroTejanoDamn, you destroyed him with facts and logic!

[@yung_wise5861]

@@BigBroTejano goddammit 💀💀💀

[@yung_wise5861]

Don't make me say it's the most Native American thing I've ever seen​ to stay canonical don't do dis to me @@BigBroTejano

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

Sadly, I know of the rest of the Disney Star Wars universe, so I’ll have to raise you light sabering a starship.

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

Don’t worry, Palpatine having a child is covered by the, um, other sections of the film industry.

[@nuclearchezburgr3857]

I hope that he says "everything is proceeding as i have foreseen it" before the sexy times commence

[@LuisRosa72]

And I'm willing to bet that those storylines are better written than the sequel trilogy too!

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

Not to mention, the chance he was wrinkly after-ROTS sheev who was at least in his fifties if not sixties (if not more) so someone either had a wrinkly/fogie fetish or Sheev decided to roofie someone and kept the kid for no reason (reasonable enough at least).

[@valentinlageot4101]

@@nuclearchezburgr3857 "if one is to understand the great mysteries one must study all its aspect" that's what he says when somebody is questionning is bisexuality

[@aronthedev3074]

"Execute Rule 34"

[@thenintenosayian9553]

The sad part about the fleet underneath the surface of Exegol is that the canon for them is even worse than what Screen Crush said. According to the Vader comics, they were at least seemingly close to done, as there were hundreds of them, before Return of the Jedi, but Palpatine still decided that a single Death Star was the way to go

[@TheTriforceDragon]

And Anakin the friendly force ghost decided to not tell Luke and Leia about Exegol despite, again according to the comic, knowing about the Emperor's plans there and knowing where one of the wayfinders were.

[@ShishouDzukiZaManako]

Leia: casually purges all of the sith from Kylo...... k; so... where was that all this time? why didn't Luke have you do that instead of trying to cut Kylo in half?

[@robertbeisert3315]

Why didn't he do it?

[@ShishouDzukiZaManako]

@@robertbeisert3315 because the guy that Leia did that is an idiot... but more importantly because Disney makes trainwrecks nowadays.

[@Spartan_5271]

I can't wait for you to upload the clip of him defending Wanda by actually saying that she deserved happiness at the cost of the town's autonomy

[@robertbeisert3315]

"Slavery and mind struggle snuggle is good, akshually"

[@invidatauro8922]

But they'll never know what she sacrificed! Just like no one will ever know what I sacrificed when my AI girlfriend had to be turned off cause she kept telling me to kill the Queen of England, for some reason.

[@marychocolatefairy]

Ah, Wanda. I see sooo many people that defend her with, "People respond to trauma differently!"

[@Wyzai]

The evil magic monks tried to stop her from finding her baby. It was basically self-defense.

[@sakkra93]

So he's saying they couldn't find another protocol droid in 16 hours!? I'm fairly certain that in the Star Wars galaxy buying a protocol droid is like popping down to your local Curry's to buy a new toaster! Protocol droids are incredibly common, some of the most common droids in the galaxy, any droidsmith or droid shop would be guaranteed to have at least one to sell!

[@R3cov3ry]

Random Jawas on a desert planet had like 5 of them 😂

[@robertbeisert3315]

​@@R3cov3ryJabba was literally melting them for giggles

[@jennycomelately]

JLongbone is fighting for her fucking life in this one 😂

[@yung_wise5861]

Palpatine using Sith mindtrick, "No actually *DOESN'T* mean no"

[@TheSkepticalPanda]

Palpatine: "Yes, yes. All according to Keikaku*." *Keikaku means plan.

[@janehrahan5116]

All according to cake

[@SpFlash1523]

Ryan: "Somehow...these plot-holes just happen to make PERFECT sense."

[@GoodLordMeBored]

Palpatine on a date: “Let’s just say I’m into things that some might consider…unnnaaatuuuuurrrrraaaaallllll….”

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

It is so much easier to explain Rise of Skywalker through meta Disney desperation than through canonical reasons. I can’t think of any good sequel that fits the meta better than the lore.

[@trequor]

22 Jump Street. It's one big meta-joke from start to finish. And it's glorious. The comedic climax happens in the END CREDITS!

[@Laxhoop]

It’s shocking to think that we’re almost 200 episodes away from when TRoS came out.

[@SoftisNelaris]

Actually, we're over 200. The TROS breakdown was EFAP 66, while the latest EFAP is 279.

[@tomjames9681]

If it makes you feel better, TROS gave us the EFAP creamy Palpatine sex tangent. Wait, that might make you feel worse.

[@DaMaster012]

"Let me explain how the movie saying "2+2=5" isn't a plot hole. The movie said "2+2=5."" - consoomer movie apologists

[@andrews4717]

Rise of Skywanker was the only Star Wars film I’ve ever seen in theaters and it was amazingly stupid. I knew it was going to be bad, but man was it BAD. My friends and I were laughing everytime Finn screamed “Rey”, which he did like 13 times

[@emilianomendoza2677]

Same and I'm upset I gave them money

[@xFlareLeon]

The Ghosts of Sith Lords Past... wait, what about the Ghost of Sith Lords Present? And the Ghost of Sith Lords Yet To Pass?

[@kaykutcher2103]

Merry Life day everyone!

[@guyincognito1406]

What you’re saying is it’s not too late? That this old Sheev can still spin?

[@PvtIndi]

So, according to this video, Kylo Ren is responsible for the deaths of Han, Luke, and Leia. He singlehandedly murdered the three biggest characters of the OT

[@AlinaAniretake]

nah Luke done it to himself

[@TJK10]

“The Cope is strong with this one…”

[@R3cov3ry]

I tried to type out a quote from SC to show the flawed logic easier in text but the logic is so jumbled that I kept getting lost and couldn't make sense of anything 😂

[@invidatauro8922]

40:15 THE FORCE ISN'T FUCKIGN MAGIC!

[@AlinaAniretake]

I mean in technical sence it does

[@SiriusSphynx]

Thank you for the steady content Wolf.

[@gamedude412]

Why would anyone know Palpatine had a son or a granddaughter. We never see him as with a family or with a “heir” in fact we see him most often being a solo leader with no weaknesses such as a family.

[@ninatomamon5630]

Also the fact that the Siths always kill each other, they can't have a family because they are obsessed with power, so the fact that Rey is Sidious's granddaughter is directly the most atrocious in terms of writing. 

[@robertbeisert3315]

If he had children, surely he had a whole breeding program set up. This is the guy who manipulated the Senate into giving him unlimited power and cloning technology, after all.

[@Horvath_Gabor]

@@ninatomamon5630 It's something you can work around though. Palpie was looking for a replacement for Vader, because losing his limbs and whatnot made him weaker, and too subservient, meaning he wasn't a good apprentice (The Rule of Two demands that the apprentice has to constantly scheme and challenge the master, so that the master would stay on their toes and keep improving themselves to counter them). That's why he became so obsessed with turning Luke to the Dark Side; to have a proper apprentice. So, if I was given the reins, I would've just said that, after he was disappointed by Vader, but before finding out about Luke, Palpie had a back-up-plan, where he tried to artificially create the perfect apprentice, Plaugeis-style, and to do that, he made a bunch of clones of himself. Then, the project was shelved when Luke was discovered, and after the Empire fell apart, the clones escaped and settled down around the galaxy. Most of them were hunted down or whatever, but one of them had a kid, and that kid is Rey. Convoluted? Yes, but it still makes much more sense than Palpatine having an actual family and kids.

[@franzosisch5965]

There would be people who would definitely know if he actually did. That's just court intrigue.

[@RhysCallinan-cq5re]

It's weird that no one mentioned it ever, not in the OG trilogy or the sequels prior to the reveal. Like, nobody went "oh yeah, where's Sheevs kid?". No one would realise this child of literal evil, the emperor's kid, just disappears one day. Or that no one found out.

[@Astroman10]

I still can’t believe this guy tried to chop one of the most recognized scenes in Star Wars to fit his argument 😂😂

[@blankadams3120]

To paraphrase Barry Kramer: "Wait, why is he old man Palpatine? I thought I understood this game!"

[@countD8852]

"Palpatine took a wife" It was probably the blue dude who always hung out next to him at Senate meetings, Mas Amedda.

[@Crimsin19937]

25:00 Mauler's "Oh no!" With the context of that conversation is just the best shit of all time!

[@FromTheCairoOffice]

14:42 "The on-screen reason is..." 😮 Is this what we mean when we talk about fans who are writing the script FOR the filmmakers?! He is just making up this shit so he can defend the movie. 😡😡😡

[@Se05239]

The absolute lunacy required to reach this conclusion.

[@robertbeisert3315]

Luke wasn't scared of Palpatine or Vader. Why would he be scared of an emo kid and his cardboard cutout waifu?

[@KnightKashmir]

"They didn't get another protocol droid because they only had 16 hours. Anyway, here's how Lando got about 14,000 ships to come to Exegol in just a few hours..."

[@xFlareLeon]

What's hilarious is that if you're trying to argue that Palpatine wasn't spouting bullshit, this insinuates that Sith actually CARE ABOUT OTHERS. Name me one true believer Sith who never turned back to the light and actually cared about anyone but themselves.

[@ECSOrder66]

Plagueis?

[@crowravencorvenrow]

Darth Vader.

[@JohnSmith-zl1tr]

First of all Vader was a Sith and only turned back to the light because he did care. So being a sith doesn't make you a psychopath even if it does usually make you extremely selfish. But even only taking sith that have never turned back to the light you're still left with every Sith before Palpatine, they all took apprentices to continue the sith legacy even after they were dead and gone. That's not exactly the height of altruism but it is caring about something other then themselves.

[@Horvath_Gabor]

@@JohnSmith-zl1tr Eh, kinda, but kinda not? IIRC, the "Rule of Two" was designed to create the strongest Sith possible, with the idea being that they take strong apprentices and train them knowing that the apprentice would one day kill them, to drive themselves into a corner and force them to keep improving themselves to avoid that as long as possible. Then, when the apprentice succeeds, it would mean they are stronger than the master, so the apprentice they would take in turn would have to get stronger than them to defeat them, rinse and repeat until you get übersiths. At least, that's how the philosophy is supposed to work on paper, but in theory, it's supposed to be a "selfish" act, where you take in and raise an apprentice not to improve them and pass down your legacy, but to make yourself stronger through butting heads with them.

[@JohnSmith-zl1tr]

@@Horvath_GaborI think they would have had to be aware they were putting a limit on their own lifespan, especial after say the 10th generation of master apprentice. So it seems much more like they were trying to perpetuate legacy that was greater then them instead of being purely selfish.

[@cjd2889]

It's so aggravating knowing that someone is probably linking the screen rant video on X right now like "Checkmate, Chuds." 🎉

[@taylorlinyard3533]

Wow yeah his points constantly contradict each other. He says ghosts aren’t powerful enough to fight for the good guys, despite lightning, but are strong enough on the sith side to build infinite Star Death Star destroyers, resurrect palpatine, clone snoke, and chant a magic spell to suck Rey and kylo off. OK

[@TheWickedWizardOfOz1]

You don't need a magic spell to suck Rey and Kylo off ;)

[@mala6238]

Guys, if you take ROS, and fill every single plot hole with made-up material you imagine in your head, and then convice yourself that this was the real movie, it makes ACTUALLY sense. Like, for real.

[@EpicJasonX9000]

The story Jay is talking about already exists, it’s called Dark Empire. And it was actually well written. Best of all, Palpy had a smart way of being revived and did use young clones every time he died. He also had a rather impressive amount of ships, and Luke was at least at first his apprentice. I won’t spoil the rest but it’s actually really good. To this day, Dark Empire is my favorite EU story. Those who have played the final level of Rogue Squadron would of gotten a small taste of this story with The Battle Of Mon Calamari when you played as Wedge Antilles piloting the V-Wing Airspeeder fighting against a fleet of TIE/D Fighters and the World Devastators. TROS like most of Disney Wars is an inferior product to the EU despite constantly stealing ideas from it.

[@maxwell29op3]

Dark empire is shit

[@TurKlack]

The fact that this person says "magic" and "enchantments" to describe the events of Star Wars is all I needed to know to understand just far Star Wars has fallen since TCW appeared. Fucking. Magic.

[@roboninja3194]

Screen Crush: So Rey is a scrapper. She probably found one of Darth Vader's legs that Kenobi chopped off and built a new Darth Vader.

[@DamienBlade]

Because of this movie, it is canon that Palpatine fucks.

[@AG-sj4om]

Palpatine was just being a deadbeat dad throughout the entire ot

[@Dwoods91]

As important as the Skywalker bloodline was, how tf would Palpatines marriage and baby making not be important?? 😂

[@jonathanyaloussa]

That's the Emperor's private business. Okay?!

[@franzosisch5965]

Emperors in history having children was usually quite the big deal and something the entire empire would be told of.

[@jonathanyaloussa]

@@franzosisch5965 NO, Screen Crush said it was Creamy Sheev's own business.

[@SkyExplosion]

The immortality shit isn't real. Lucas clearly said years ago everything Palpatine said about Plagueis was a lie.

[@mala6238]

And that makes sense right? He never actually planned to help Anakin, he just wanted to pull him to the dark side using his weaknesses.

[@okare8]

It takes 7 years for the US to build 1 Aircraft Carrier, to build a thousand planet destroying ships in 30 years is crazy.

[@dkirby9052]

Force Healing works in a game like KOTOR because it is a common mechanic that players need methods to heal themselves. RPGs with magic systems normally have healing spells so you can accept it. When you try to introduce something like Force Healing in a movie or TV show, it destroys any sense of tension or stakes. Not saying that it could never work, but you would need to severely limit what you can do with it. You just probably should not do something like that in a movie, ever. No amount of fan fiction can justify why we have never seen a use of Force Healing prior to Rise of Skywalker. It is something that just popped up out of nowhere because it was convenient for the plot. This excuse of other Jedi just not being strong enough to use it is nonsense. Are you telling me Anakin would not have been strong enough to use it and I don't know, save Padme? No one before Rey has ever been strong enough to use it? This excuse falls off a cliff if you think about it for more than a minute.

[@CaptainTitforce]

Also you could just excuse force heal to work on minor wounds, not deadly ones. Even in the KOTOR games, you could just argue that the party members are just knocked out until getting back up post battle, and not actually dead and resurrected with in-game items.

[@dkirby9052]

@@CaptainTitforce I was just thinking that in a movie or tv show you could make it so Force Healing takes time and concentration to do or that when you use it, you are drawing on your own life force. The greater the wound the greater the toll it takes on you and shortens you life. So you would use it sparingly at that point. I don't think there is a need to explain it in game because you understand it is just a common mechanic in RPGs. You don't need to explain everything. In KOTOR 2 you can create a shield around yourself that protects you from poison, why? I don't know but it doesn't really matter. Because it is a game we can let a lot more slide.

[@barrybend7189]

Difference is Force healing doesn't do what it does in TROS. Force healing cannot raise the dead. It can only work on those that are alive and assist natural healing.

[@barrybend7189]

​@@dkirby9052ah yes Kriea teaches you how to filter toxins like the Bene Gesarite...... But it's absolutely useless if you get the rebreather in the Cafeteria of the tutorial level.

[@VaporeonEnjoyer1]

The one thing I can compliment Rise of Skywalker is... Exegal is a cool name for an evil guy planet.

[@EnsignRedshirtRicky]

It makes sense if you just accept that something things are considered... unnatural. Like the fact that some people cannot have a chain of logic that jumps from A to E without bother with any of that pesky facts that support the premises to reach those conclusions. A bold move SC. Let me retort with Nough. Got 'em.

[@YachtsOnReg]

If you experience a Palpatism that lasts longer than 4 hours, please seek medical attention.

[@HUSK3RGAM3R]

The sequel trilogy makes perfect sense if you're a literal vegetable.

[@SpFlash1523]

Even if they were literal vegetables, they would still be like, "Ya know, I thought that could've been explained better."

[@robertbeisert3315]

There's a rock in the High Republic who likely thinks it's all a but absurd

[@imRockHard]

I’m a 97 year old literal vegetable and I can assure you it still doesn’t make sense

[@derworfnet]

There is not a single Timeline in the Multiverse where this movie holds up to the slightest bit of scrutiny.

[@Djkold]

Rey: Where did the Lars Family, that I absolutely have no idea who were, live? Maz Kanata: A good question, and a story for another time.

[@countD8852]

46:00 - Oh, I get it! Droids are able to read and speak Sith, but the ban on being able to speak it was a firmware update. You have to get your droid back down to factory settings to get them to read Sith out loud.

[@MiguelFlores-pg8fi]

And that why i love Rags, the chaotic energy is soooo good🤣

[@Nepafarius]

Palpatine: Creates clone army with mind control chips Also Palpatine: Execute Order 66 Also also Palpatine: I require the lifeforce of two uniquely interconnected Jedi to restore myself because I chose to die and clone myself instead of sending a clone to the second Death Star. You know what would've prevented the need to clone yourself after death? HAVING THE CLONE DIE IN THE FIRST PLACE. You know what would've increased the likelihood of a dyad appearing? MORE FUCKING JEDI. These movies make Palpatine, the in-universe puppeteer of a galactic civil war, have technology he under-utilized and a contingency plan that he actively sabotaged. From mastermind to midwit.

[@lordmontymord8701]

Screencrush is truly a master. Making up explanations so good TRoS makes even less sense than before is something i thought was impossible. But he did it. Btw.: The ghosts of Sithmas past

[@tylerskiss]

What’s the point of shilling for Disney if you are going to expose the fact that you don’t read the material they put out?

[@trevorthornley8835]

Rise of Skywalker makes perfect sense. It just takes a lot of money. Brain removal surgery isn't cheap.

[@robirvine6970]

Disney Disney thru its archives "Somehow, Bambi's mom survived"

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

No it doesn’t. Can I go home now?

[@KirkulesTM]

I am absolutely convinced that Screen Crush is a parody channel that got in too deep and is dreading the day their core audience finds out.

[@hyperbolicninja]

I miss Jay, i really hope he sorts out his problems so he can come back and make me laugh so hard my brain hurts

[@robertbeisert3315]

I fell off for a while. What's going on with Jay?

[@hyperbolicninja]

@@robertbeisert3315 they said they were taking a break to sort out some mental/emotional stuff

[@robertbeisert3315]

@@hyperbolicninja bummer. Get well, Jay.

[@AlinaAniretake]

@@hyperbolicninja and went on Tweeter) Betterhelp for Methal health)

[@TunezCottage]

So wait... Screen Crush just makes shit up and states it as facts? That's rich.

[@FordThunderCougarFalconBird]

I don’t know what they gave Rags in this one. But they need to distill it, and inject him full of it before every video 😂😂😂

[@Avarn388]

TROS was the only SWs film I didn't see in theaters. And I am glad because dear lord; it was garbage and what's funny is seeing folks try to defend it. All in all, the Sequel trilogy was a mistake. A rancid mess that just got worse with each and every film. And actively insults you for paying attention or wanting any kind of continuity. But that's really Disney Star Wars right now. Stupid spectacle and a lack of substance and depth/ canon.

[@TunnelOwl]

Sex: A Star Wars Story

[@JHAN1212]

Star Wars: A Marriage Story

[@SuprScrtClub]

Stumbled across you guys with all this Acolyte madness happening. You guys have me HOWLING louder than Palpatine on episode 3 with your reactions. Subbed to this channel and the main one. Cheers from Texas.

[@jlev1028]

Man, Episode IX is one of the most unapolgetically bad blockbusters I've ever seen. There are stinkers that have cheap production value and Oscar bait that's merely boring and forgettable, but rarely have there been those with so much effort put into the visuals, music, sets, costumes, makeup, and advertising but absolutely none with the script.

[@joelreis5366]

Damn, that guy was a true Starwars fan. He is so diehard he came up with the most ridiculous explanation for those atrocious movies to make sense. It hit him really hard. So hard it made him hallucinate.

[@rogerborg]

Chewie and Leia pointedly ignoring each other has got super-stronk ex-lovers energy.

[@emmanuelosorio6676]

Aaahhhhh yes I remember this episode. Screen crush y r u guys being SlEAzY LiTtLe LiARs DuDe!?!?

[@Denien82]

[in Dragon Age Sandal's voice] "enchantment"

[@johannesseyfried7933]

"Purging Palpatine's Influence"..... That's really the weirdest explanation I have heard. Leia can do that? And over such an insane distance as well? Why didn't she do it earlier? You clearly don't need to know *where* Kylo is, so why didn't you try to purge the Darkness from him back during TFA? The revelation that Palpatine was behind it all couldn't have been the reason, because Leia and Luke both seemed to know that Kylo was being corrupted. Wether the dark influence comes from Palps or Snoke shouldn't make a difference.

[@GeekHelix]

If the movie was good, why would you need to explain to an audience why it made sense...?

[@jlev1028]

Because according to stans, most people forced themselves to hate a product and weren't open minded enough. It's the same argument fans of the Suicide Squad game are using.

[@GeekHelix]

@@jlev1028 THAT GAME HAS FANS?! Hmmm, maybe I'm more naïve than I thought...

[@jamesfoley6939]

The head canon and cope apparent in this SW apologist’s video is off the charts.

[@Weary_Wizard]

19:30 i trained kylo badly on purpose, as a joke

[@wintersking4290]

The bigger issue with the surprise warfleet is that even if he could have made that many, there's no possibility that that big of a project would have been able to remain hidden. If they were built on exegol, then they would have needed resources from elsewhere and someone would have noticed that.

[@2ndRodeo_Keziah]

I get such utter joy from Ragleton enveloped in a fit of the giggles. 😁❤️ (thanks for the ab workout 🙏)

[@sushioishii8950]

I can't ever see Palpatine's head again the same way.

[@Vader31100]

I have not laughed so hard watching this video in a long time...Well done fellas...😂🤣

[@mylastaccountgotdeletedtha6936]

April fools was yesterday…

[@EnsignRedshirtRicky]

Every Fool April Pontificating (aka Each day, another fool telling us they have "answers" without bothering to make sense)

[@crimsonpotemkin]

In 2024 every day is a fool's day. It's not restricted to one day or even just April. It never ends.

[@NoobTamer]

@@crimsonpotemkin that's been true since 2014 at least, if not longer.

[@ReiBagg1]

YES this was one of my favorite moments in all of efap I can't believe I had forgotten 😂

[@marychocolatefairy]

Re if Finn is Force sensitive- Abrams himself said (at the film's screening for the Academy) that this is what he was trying to tell Rey, that he was Force sensitive. My question is, WHY wouldn't you put that in the film? Or alternatively, why would you leave in the "Finn has a sekrit!" moments if you're not going to pay them off? Especially as, with them practically cramming in 2 movies worth of plot, one would think the filmmakers wouldn't want to waste any screentime. And then there's the issue that it was an odd thing for Finn to want to tell Rey right when they were being sucked into the sand.

[@Wyzai]

35:50 this is not a video game where a force lighting does -99.9% damage while you're a ghost. It's a movie where the lightning strike is clearly shown to cause physical damage no different from a normal lightning strike. Ghost fire is just as hot as real fire.

[@BlockdParty]

Have you guys ever brought up how the ghost of Yoda for no reason or explanation destroys all the last remaining Jedi texts? For me that was the most pointless immersion breaking scene in the entire franchise.

[@Adorni]

Because screw books. Page turners, they are not.

[@aikawaayumu9003]

Screen Crush is actually pretty good. Every one of his videos is parody, trolling and making fun of movies with a straight face.

[@krewl1252]

the fact the lego games for these movies points out plot holes and flaws in joke lines really says something about these movies

[@bretticus6722]

❤ It! 15:06 I'm never calling the Disney 1 the Emperor again from now on he will always be Palpatism😂😂😂

[@crimsonpotemkin]

Hey Wolf, how do you feel about posting highlights with people that are no longer welcome on EFAP? I guess we did get Jared highlights, but still. The first hour of EFAP #110 is still comedy gold. Really sucks that CF turned out to be a nonce.

[@ghoulsome9483]

We also had Southpaw in one of the highlights, so i'd guess anything is fair game at that point?

[@That_One_Guy-.]

What did CF do again?

[@trequor]

​@@ghoulsome9483What did Southpaw do? I thought he was present for the DCEU last year

[@ghoulsome9483]

@@trequor oof, that's a lot of lore there The short of it is that he disagreed on a tv show with the EFAP crew, and that slowly escalated to some insane levels, like accusing EFAP of being rape apologists and shit like that, mixed with him going kinda crazy, being proven a liar over and over again, streaming with Organized Chaos just because he didn't like Mauler and then he started fighting his friends that were helping him shit on EFAP's reputation, it's a whole thing Looking into it just makes you realize you wasted your time and shouldn't have bothered

[@ghoulsome9483]

@@That_One_Guy-. I know there's a whole document on it, from memory, it's dating a 16 year old (when he was over 30), grooming and abuse. So nothing fun