The Eternals - A Boring, Unfocussed Disaster

The Eternals turned out to be just as bad as everyone predicted, and its easy to see why. Join me as I break down this stinker.

[@TheCriticalDrinker]

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[@tylerjohn2098]

Hi dad

[@Elsa-rq2ty]

@Rapunzel ♪ this is nice

[@supremeconprimeoverlord8114]

0:42-0:41 Angelina Jolie, salma Hayek , Richard madden ,the Indian guy(sorry I keep forgetting his name ) and Gemma Chan :-R WE A JOKE TO YOU 0:43

[@yeoldeblitz9399]

Mcu fans screaming into pillows forcing themselves to say it's a masterpiece

[@amoghketkar2559]

@@supremeconprimeoverlord8114 isn't he Pakistani?

[@MaMastoast]

The strangest thing about this movie is that these characters have known each other for thousands of years and still have awkward conversations as if they dont know each other that well..after 500 years they would know absolutely everything about each other

[@TOONYBOY]

Yeah, come to think about it,, what the hell do you talk about after all that time?

[@yourordinaryartist169]

Nah, there's much stranger things about it.

[@MSmith-ib1du]

Well, in defense of this piece- of- shit movie, I have had colleagues I have worked with for 6 years and we haven't crossed more words than the standard "Good day Mr. Smith"

[@TOONYBOY]

@@MSmith-ib1du Yeah, but as you said, you haven't spoke to them, and I'd imagine your workplace is bigger than a small farmhouse. Plus, you were likely focused on your job, at least enough not to hold small talk with people who were potentially in and out, focused on their own job or maybe from a different department entirely. These people are basically monitors. They sit in a farmhouse or secluded location for 1000 years and wait for something bad to happen.

[@kanedNunable]

good point, they would likely be sick of each other and hate their guts after that time

[@dartoney]

I love how every time people hate on a movie that has "diversity" the creators always think people have a problem with the diversity and not how fucking bad the movie is

[@infinitesimotel]

The reason is because they are using movies as a vehicle to push "diversity" and all the other degenerate filth. They are propaganda pitches. Im just glad that people are being strident in calling out the peddlers of agenda..

[@TheQueenIsWithin]

I was wondering if I was the only one who saw that.

[@FixedFace]

@@infinitesimotel so, what you are saying is that blabipocx+ people like the movie because they are less intelligent? way to go mr hytler

[@Russ0107]

@@FixedFace did you just say blabipocx+ and expect not to get mocked

[@infinitesimotel]

@@FixedFace I have no idea how you would draw such a conclusion from my post. What the hell does blabipocx+ even mean?.....

[@thecollector427]

"The LGBT representation in the movie will save lives." The lack of self awareness of some people is mind blowing. How important do these actors think they are?

[@elg7365]

They don't believe this shit.

[@hairyscrotumus]

@@elg7365 El G

[@hairyscrotumus]

@@elg7365 EL G

[@hairyscrotumus]

@@elg7365 EL G

[@hairyscrotumus]

EL G

[@Lasastard]

When ticking as many boxes as possible becomes more important than telling a compelling, focused story...

[@johndiamond6931]

Absolutely 💯

[@_birdie]

You just described the entirety of the entertainment industry haha

[@prasetyodwikuncorojati2434]

Thats how most recent movie studios work.

[@MissCookieThief]

"While having a diverse cast is certainly no bad thing, it's also not a magical shield you can use to protect your shitty movie from criticism." This. This is what film and television today doesn't seem to get.

[@theprofesionalist7927]

I mean I was surprised by the critics score. For a second I thought "holy shit are the critics finally realizing that go woke=go broke and that your cast diversity doesn't mean shit if your plot is trash"?!?

[@damiandamiano3651]

@@reubenaringo8513 diversity fails , soon you will understand because world situation stability fails and when laws no longer exist the dominant force take a lead , there will be no mercy when the time will come to wipe out what doesnt belong in system , its essential mechanism like autophagy , programmed cancer ,virus and bacteria death for body to clean itself

[@fredsas12]

Right on point. The irony is that diverstiy existed well enough in movies and films from the 80s, 90s and 2000s and with far better scripts and better acting. Woketivists and their "input" are pretty much the most UN-required "necessities" in movies today.

[@ShadowSonic2]

@@fredsas12 Sure, they existed well enough when most nonwhites were a bunch of goofy stereotypes that were nothing compared to the standard white lead.

[@fredsas12]

@@ShadowSonic2 A lead is a lead. There is no such thing as a standard "white" lead. The majority of US citizens (and thus Hollywood) is are "white" regardless of their ethnicity, so that is only natural, not racist.. If you went to Africa and watched a "Nollywood" movie, would you accuse Africans of racism because all their leads were black? What about Bollywood in India, would you accuse them because all their leads, no, their ENTIRE casts are brown? or the Caribbean? Its absolutely bigoted to assume that just because traditionally, a "lead" in a movie was a certain colour, that those people and institutions are engulfed in racism.. The irony is that this is how institutional racism actually starts.. Deliberate movements to displace a group of people because of their skin colour IS racism. And woke views against whites is racism on the highest order..

[@lornenoland8098]

This should’ve been a Disney+ series. Too many characters and plot lines for one movie.

[@HouseOfAlastrian]

Definitely would have worked a lot better as a series. The sheer scope of how much it wanted to do is over-ambitious to say the least... I'd say a series of ten 1 hour episodes would have done it justice. Still has the problem of bored, disinterested acting from the cast and Chloe Zhao's lack of directorial experience, though. Not to mention the dumbass contrivance that explains why they didn't help against Ultron or Thanos.

[@aoyukifuyu9490]

I was thinking the same thing

[@cindyfontanez8122]

Mhm

[@agafigna9117]

I wonder if they made it into a series would it be more or less expensive than the movie...

[@aliciarosemusic]

Good point!

[@dantedeluca978]

The funniest part is the that 'deaf girl' can hear by feeling the vibrations. That's literally how hearing works, which is why the question if a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound because technically all sound is vibrations until it's heard. So they technically made a mute hero, not a deaf one

[@madeliner1682]

Which is even worse because it implies muteness is a more distinctive feature of being deaf than not being able to hear 🤦‍♀️

[@Overlysarcasticfox]

I’ve met deaf/HoH people who talk too, so I don’t understand why she’s mute if she can still technically hear

[@CalvinKalisto]

@@Overlysarcasticfox I heard that because she's fast the sonic boom would affect her, hence why she's deaf.

[@biferose158]

@@CalvinKalisto well that would be weird logic - breaking of the dound barrier makes a boom - but she would be ahead/though the speed of sound it’s self and therefore the boom would be behind her? Although its hard to test unless you can fly or outrun sound lol

[@benjaminshiels1824]

Omg yur comment is so validating. I had a conversation about the tree falling in th wood's n I may as well have been talking to th proverbial tree! Lol

[@gone3747]

The reason why 2012’s The Avengers was so amazing was because it took 6 characters that were introduced in previous movies and teamed them up to fight together, it did not introduce all 6 of the Avengers at once in the same movie like the Eternals did, instead it connected previous movies that already each introduced their respective protagonists, and teamed them up in one big movie that’s connected to their introductions, therefore not wasting or cramming time with exposition. Now none of us knew who these 10 Eternals were before this movie, so they had to cram their introductions into the first hour and it most certainly didn’t work, which is why you’ll see so many people saying it should’ve been a disney + series

[@SirBlackReeds]

It wasn't amazing. It was a novelty.

[@moridin3336]

What's funny, is they also had a counter example already showing that was a known failure w/ that exact criticism, Justice League.

[@reedr7142]

As someone who never watched a Marvel movie until Avengers 2012, that movie won me over without needing any of the previous films. I’m not disagreeing with your point. It’s quite valid. I’m just illustrating how a movie can compel a viewer, despite that viewer not having any of the “prequels” for reference point. That’s what good writing’ll get ya. Unlike the Eternals.

[@CaptSaiyaman1941]

Well the whole "reason" they didn't get involved with Thanos is because they only respond to deviant threats yet Thanos is technically part Deviant. Brilliant.

[@IftiAlam1999]

Maybe not in MCU🤷‍♂️

[@thedoctorfez1865]

@@IftiAlam1999 no. He is also a deviant in the mcu.

[@FRISHR]

Thanos was actually born as an Eternal but has mutations that made him look like a Deviant, in the comics at least.

[@abhinavyadav13]

in the comics, thanos is an eternal too, just with a deviant gene, so not a deviant by definition, don't know what take mcu is going to take.

[@JBurnz001]

Oh let’s not forget they are robots but somehow Thanos and his brother were born from another eternal. Which makes no sense since they can’t reproduce. Everything that Thanos had seemed to not mention especially when he should have been worried that the Celestials would stop him since they are these “GODS” who apparently don’t seem to pay attention to what their creations are even doing until it’s to late. Great storytelling 🤦🏾‍♂️

[@scribbles1424]

When you have to hide behind "diversity" and "pissing off the right people" then you know the film sucks. The critics aren't going to hold back forever, a bad movie is a bad movie no matter how diverse it is.

[@GhostFire455]

The casting isn't the issue. It's the crappy story telling jumping all over the place. Ajak was suppose to be wise but some how wiped by here underlying. Ciri was all over the place emotional. Maybe the actress just didn't try. Only people you truly feel a connection to is drung and the deft girl. They felt more real. Messy movie.

[@daveroles3783]

@@GhostFire455 No, I have been noticing the same thing. Movies over the last couple years have become shit. I started noticing this after realizing every movie now has to have every single ethnic group cast, include all sexual orientations, talk about gender, oh, and make sure we don't forget to mention that guns are bad. The token black guy in Eternals is ALSO the token gay guy? Really?! A Celestial would make a gay black guy? Why would a Celestial even make different ethnic characters? Literally makes no sense.

[@GIBBO4182]

@@daveroles3783 it’s not just movies that try to tick all the diversity boxes…every tv ad does it aswell

[@quantum6641]

I liked the movie

[@user-jl8io3ik5y]

Can we no like...respect the effort for decent, contextual representation even with critically bad story telling - it's nice just to have folk in a group being their thing and that not define them as characters (Athena aside) - while also acknowledging shite writing and bad character development? Maybe the people involved are so used to shit waves due to the smallest sign of this, they go to defence automatically since we're not in a world where fair story criticism can happen without the shittier people piling on just because of casual representation? I dont blame them for circling the wagons...but yeah, bad movie, some good spirited attempts at making standards for future movies better. Still want my money back =P

[@victorpradha9946]

Diverse cast + aimless, jumbled narrative + poor characterization = horrible movie. Bland, uniform cast + aimless, jumbled narrative + poor characterization = horrible movie. Conclusion: Diversity was NOT the problem!

[@SirBlackReeds]

Though it was a problem.

[@bakonman6611]

trying to shove diversity into something can create more problems than if you just had a 'uniform' cast.

[@victorpradha9946]

@@bakonman6611 Yeah...you're right! These shows should go ALL BLACK or ALL LATINO or ALL ASIAN or ALL WHITE ...and represent the world the way God who created Black, Latino, Asian, and White people, intended things to be! BTW, Asian people comprise 59.76% of the total world population. Indians and Chinese alone would amount to 50% of the entire world population. Somebody needs to take this up with God...about the whole 'uniform' thing!

[@bakonman6611]

You don't seem to have understood any of what my comment actually meant.

[@dinbabwa452]

@@SirBlackReeds Your the problem its a problem.

[@SerKGrimm]

"The *Eternals* are a group of immortal alien warriors who were sent to Earth thousands of years ago by the *Celestials* to protect humanity from the *Deviants."* This is why you don't let the creatively bankrupt name your species.

[@kitsune8460]

"We need a movie about diversity!" X-Men : Are we a joke to you?

[@RSG_TheMonster]

And now Disney are doing a X-Men Disney+ show

[@dcmastermindfirst9418]

@@RSG_TheMonster It'll probably be forced political diverse garbage too That's what Disney does

[@exodore2000]

Please make a Alpha Flight Movie it was made to be a Diversity movie, and X-men as well but that name they have a problem with.

[@gosanxi9108]

Only spiderman no way home will make me watch MCU again or Guardian Of The Galaxy vol 3.

[@gustavogutierrez6568]

im wondering how they're going to fuck up the x-men i mean x-people jesus christ

[@onehitwonder561]

You know, not every comic needs to be made into a movie.

[@Neyodip]

Marvel is just throwing random shit at the wall

[@MrJustinOtis]

Sshhhh. Don't ask questions. Just consume product and get excited for next product.

[@Rx37Legacy]

Is that like a personal attack or something?!

[@paul6618]

There's so much more comics that they could choose from. Whoever is picking what to adapt is really doing a shit job. I think they're just focusing on "diversity" instead of giving us the the representation as it was meant to be. There are many individual superheroes in Marvel who are "diverse" and have been part of the Avengers at one point in time, they could have added one or two of them to their MCU instead they chose to put 10 people into a single movie. Damn.

[@onehitwonder561]

@@paul6618 -- It all about who can be the wokest at Disney.

[@mathewperring]

The problem with having a diverse cast from a story telling perspective is you need to give the group a compelling reason to be together, that more homogeneous groups can do without needing to supply an explanation. You have to work hard to do this, meaning you have to give up something else, they did not stick the landing on this one

[@alilishaa8824]

I think they already have a compelling reason to be together. I mean, it was clearly stated multiple times in the movie that they are these robot alien things that were created and ordered to "protect" the Earth. I think their diverse powers aren't really a problem since, well A LOT of movies/ shows have a group of heroes with different powers/ weapons in order to benefit them and to make them more unique.

[@dinbabwa452]

@@alilishaa8824 lol I love how you state that diversity = diverse powers. hahahah

[@dinbabwa452]

This story did not need a reason for them to be diverse. They are robots made by a celestial. They could be made to look like what ever the Celestial wanted. So he was creative and made them look all kinds of ways. Why is this a problem? The divers casting simple comes from a desire to feature diverse actors, it literally has little to do with the story. So why get all upset about it not living up to some need for a logical reason to have multiethnic or not have one for that matter?

[@edsonmhango5873]

Honestly it had some good ideas, just not enough time to properly develop them. Should've been a 10 one hour episode series. Would've sparked some interesting conversations

[@aliciarosemusic]

Definately!

[@carlodurant87]

why does everyone on tv only want to do 10 episodes of everything now. its a very disturbing trend. whatever happened to making 13-26 episodes of a tv show during one season

[@edsonmhango5873]

@@carlodurant87 well done shows like Invincible, The Boys and Stranger things have shown it works. Also, less fillers

[@darkjelly944]

That does sound like a better alternative on paper, but considering what the creators had in mind for this movie, the lack of experience of the cast and crew, and emphasizing "THE MESSAGE" over good storytelling, I wouldn't be surprised if they found some way to screw it up. Honestly, I could see them fumbling around entire episodes complaining about how hard and pitiful it is being a "diverse" person instead of advancing or highlighting the plot in any meaningful way. The purpose of this movie was to indulge in "representation", not tell a good story. Giving the creators more time would not have magically fixed the fundamentally flawed approach to this project. It would have just created MORE hamfisted emphasis on the "diversity" of the cast, because that's what the purpose of this movie was. In summary, Eternals is not a movie, it is a WOKE commercial.

[@SirBlackReeds]

It would have still sucked.

[@RideMyLighting]

“We cannot interfere in human conflicts” Yeah, I didn’t know that wiping half the universe was considered a “human conflict”.

[@vlad78th]

There're not here to save humanity, if you had seen the movie, you would have known.

[@Halfort57]

@@vlad78th "we were told not to interfere unless it involved Deviants." Yadda yadda or some lazy bullshit excuse.

[@Bilal-fi9ev]

@@vlad78th killing half of the population on earth, delaying the emergence/birth of celestials and I though they supposed to protect intelligent life on earth, so the population can grow and let the emergence happen. This conflict was definetly not "human conflict" as RideMyLighting wrote lmao

[@flaviochuahy3440]

@@Halfort57 thanos is actually a deviant in some story lines, so that doesnt even fit

[@pandapo7542]

@@vlad78th if you have seen the movie, then you definitely lost out.

[@rickkmarks3488]

I was literally more excited for this review than the movie itself.

[@TRUMP_2024_PREZ]

FIRST LAWSUITS AND NOW DISNEY DELAYED 5 CRINGEWORHTY MCU FILMS IN 2022...I SEE A MASSIVE TRAINWRECK COMING FOR DISNEY/MARVEL #FACTS 💣💥🚅

[@infinitesimotel]

Given the pattern I dont know wyy anyone would be excited about a movie coming out these days.

[@seriouslee6741]

Yup, kinda sad that a 10 minute video of a KZbin critic is more entertaining than a x hour long movie.

[@TRUMP_2024_PREZ]

THIS ENTIRE TREAD IS MORE ENTERTAINING THAN ALL 25 MCU CRINGEWORHTY FILMS #FACTS

[@coolgirl2044]

@@infinitesimotel Lol yeah, the only film I actually watched in theaters since The Last Jedi (lol) was the MHA film that recently dropped, and that's not an American film, thank god it's not.

[@johngregg5735]

I believe it was called 'The Eternals' because it never ends

[@thomasboyce4589]

"This movie will save lives!" How melodramatic and narcissistic and full of hubris.....

[@VanimationFilms]

“A film must be made with the heart, not the mind. I think today's young filmmakers have forgotten this and instead they make films through their calculations” -Akira Kurosawa

[@allthingshollywood2620]

I can only imagine how incredible The Eternals would be, if Akira was still alive AND was asked by Marvel to direct it.

[@murdockfiles9406]

Akira Kurosawa has inspired so many directors like Martin Scorsese, Frances Ford Coppola, Steven Spielberg, and George Lucas. They understood how to emulate the masters, and create the greatest films ever made. Today's directors are so subservient to studios looking to create popularity out of repetition, hence the MCU.

[@tctyt]

This is sadly true, Kurosawa was entirely right about the Modern films.

[@snitchzerboo]

A movie should be made with both heart and mind You need some big brain to make a masterpiece like Joker

[@VanimationFilms]

Ps I thought Chloe Zhao made a film that was more heart driven than a lot of mcu films. Therefore I really liked it… I had a emotional reaction, that touched me. Is it perfect? By all means no. But a bad film is better than a mediocre one…

[@RogueFox7050]

The Eternals: “Imagine a film where everyone is Cyclops, while the dialogue itself is all written by the Architect from The Matrix: Reloaded.” -Doug Walker

[@NotCOPPAFTCA]

**Cuts To Doug Walker In A Ball On The Floor**

[@donniepatt9514]

@mr nobody dude stop spamming

[@gavinsfriend3901]

If Doug walker says it’s bad I believe the master of shite

[@markthorby1164]

🤣🤣

[@ghostwarrior3878]

@@donniepatt9514 already reported

[@benc77]

I love how they are meant to be perfect warriors, yet we have a child and a out of shape man, nice one

[@SeraphsWitness]

"LGBTQ representation will save lives" is one of the dumbest phrases to ever be in a headline.

[@Derek-qu8qi]

As soon as they said one of the characters was called Ikaris, I knew he’d die in the Sun. literally within minutes of the movie starting, I saw that coming.

[@1rish_pher099]

Bro, but it didn't even make sense for him to die in the sun.

[@umbertosambo6040]

I was so bored of him that I didn't even realized the irony

[@ihateverifiedbotchannels6974]

@@1rish_pher099 lmao

[@578gzp]

Bro YES. He like, threw a fit his betrayal didn't work, then said "fuck it" and flung himself into the sun for absolutely no reason. Like I've lived thousands of years but this? THIS is when I snap. So DUMB.

[@roman5101]

@@578gzp When that scene happened, my friend and I started CRYING laughing. What a stupid scene. Like what the fuck? Lmao

[@TheHulkbuster13]

everyone: Why didn't you help against Thanos? Eternals: We were told to only fight against the deviants. Me: But Thanos is an Eternal with the Deviant gene. He's genetically stamped to be someone you're suppose to fight against. Eternals: Well, .. I . . a ... .

[@aredjayc2858]

YUP, they're selectively incorporating the comic book lore

[@random-jn8ec]

Don't ask questions. We do not do that here.

[@dragonquest8ftw1]

Ignoring that, their explanations STILL don't make sense, especially when humans are killing each other which is causing the need for intelligent life to slow. The Celestials need intelligent life on a planet so another Celestial can grow and be born from within that planet, and Ajak even acknowledges and explains to Ikarus that The Snap delayed the celestials birth for years. The rule of 'not inteferring' is literally delaying the celestials birth because of the wars and death that went on, had Ultron's plan succeeded, it would have stopped the Celestial outright. Hell, there's even one eternal capable of stopping them from killing themselves and he's told to not to do the thing that not only HE WAS FUCKING MADE TO DO but would help the celestial be born?!

[@LegacyComics100]

Also, what about Hyperion?

[@luca201411]

They knew they screwd it, right from the trailer: "when you love something, you protect it" "Then why didn't you fight Thanos?" "We were told not do so". Aaaaaall right.

[@Real_MisterSir]

Eternals: Are only supposed to fight deviants because deviants are a risk to intelligent life and the birth of new Celestials. Also Eternals: Don't intervene with Thanos, who is literally wiping half of ALL EXISTENCE from the universe, essentially destroying the chance for any Celestial to be born at all within any foreseeable future (and also potentially killing tons of Eternals in the process) This movie is so dumb.

[@quantum6641]

So are they now not suppose to release any new hero because it will interfere with a 4 year old movies?

[@Real_MisterSir]

@@quantum6641 No but maybe they could have spent a grand total of more than 10 minutes trying to write an actually decent plot point to validate their former absence.. You know, write, as professionals.. as what they're paid millions to do. Just a thought

[@quantum6641]

@@Real_MisterSir they literally told the reason, their creator only gave them permission to interfere only when deviants are involved. They also didn't interfere with both world wars even tho it killed shit load of humans and delayed the Celestial from being born cause there was no deviants involved in those conflicts

[@Real_MisterSir]

@@quantum6641 Yes they told a reason they came up with in 10 minutes. The entire reason they were only to act towards the deviants, is because deviants posed a threat to intelligent life. But in extension, Thanos literally removed half of all intelligent life in the entire universe (plus he's part deviant himself anyways) so my point is that their puny attempt to make an excuse only creates even more plotholes. If they can't earn their wage and come up with a real reason to the potential plothole, then perhaps they should simply leave it unaddressed for now and find more time to work on proper writing. It aint that hard lmao, and there's a reason the movie has gotten pretty low ratings. Writing is one of those reasons.

[@mookiedt]

Sersi, with the op power of transmutation, didn't think of ever using it on deviants until thousands of years later? And she's suppose to be seen as the main protagonist? Are you kidding me? That's like if I had the ability to fly, but instead of using my power to save someone that's barely hanging a ledge then flying them down to safety. I simply run towards them, help them up then carry them down several flights of stairs.

[@tusharbhat2367]

Man when the Drinker said that he saw Eternals and said that his review was coming out soon on Twitter, I was more excited for his review than the movie

[@wookiebear8468]

Same here, man.

[@CelestialInfinite678]

Same my guy 👌

[@notalpharius97]

Exactly the same way.

[@toby2581]

I'm more excited for my next bowel movement then The Eternals.

[@KingMinionDemon]

I get excited when my favorite KZbinrs reviewing movies that I will never bother to pay to watch.

[@randaranatunga7259]

“A movie about a bunch of characters anyones ever heard of, starring a bunch of actors nobody cares about, Written by a bunch of people with fuck all accomplishments and qualifications and directed by someone with a grand total of 3 movies to her name” I honestly don’t think there’s much more to say

[@selkirkswift]

Indeed, the rest was padding to hit 10 minutes lol

[@Boomslayer19]

This is what happens if you focus on diversity diversity by itself is fine but let it occur naturally if prioritize peoples race and gender over skill Merritt and talent you get this Hire actors and directors with talent and skill This is a problem with modern movies as a whole A bunch of hack writers with a director that doesn't know what they are doing starring a bunch of nobodies will always fail because meritocracy works people get hired based on there talent and skills for a reason

[@random-jn8ec]

But she did win Oscar for Nomadland right? How tf can she do an amazing movie and this shit with the same mind?

[@juliooquendo220]

@@random-jn8ec nobody watched that movie

[@randaranatunga7259]

@@random-jn8ec I’m just as perplexed as you I haven’t watched Nomadland but I saw a few reviews and it seemed amazing It’s a shame really, Kinda like a reverse Craig Mazin

[@marcoferraro6169]

I never understood how a race with complete control over their bodies could have one of them be deaf.

[@Spiceodog]

“ well, this sounds like it’s going to be an amazing show for Disney+” “ oh, no this is going to be a movie” “ I know what I said “ - Pitch meeting

[@OsirisNeits]

"A Celestial requires intelligent life to fuel it's growth." Boy did they pick the wrong cinematic universe.

[@cmohr6998]

Wrong planet altogether

[@MjolnirsPower]

That's a good joke, but that lore is BS. The Celestials need nothing from Mortal beings. It's the whole "gods need prayers to survive" horse manure.

[@arkhamcrazies6477]

What other decent cinematic universe is there, the DCU 💀💀

[@conan2096]

that timeline was erased, now we only have disappointment.

[@igorchistyakov8876]

@@MjolnirsPower if you have a setting, where The Secret is actually working, gods happen to be creations of people's collective imagination, manifested in real world. Hence they are born and grow in power with the numbers of their respective cults' numbers and die with said cults. This little detail may very well justify inquisition purging heresies, for example, and help writing a compelling antagonist, who does terrible things for the sake of greater good. Horse manure might give you beautiful roses if you use it wisely. Or at least stop eating it to begin with (just in case, this is a jab to Marvel's 4th phase, not you).

[@CHERN0BYLCH1LD]

“a gay character that saves lives” didn’t save the film from getting butt f**ked tho 🤣🤣

[@skeletonshorror5184]

Hhahahahahahah 💀🔥

[@Jhayzer021]

Nyahahaha!

[@benjaminlomas3684]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@dl2one]

Doesn't matter dude, lives are being saved! Lmfao

[@timothygremlin9737]

The symbolism is hard. No, that's too easy xD

[@madavarams268]

I hated the movie the moment introduced the character Gilgamesh. The fact that they make it seem gods don't exist and how mythological characters were just themselves in different time periods infuriated me on so many levels. Makkari was Mercury, Thena was Athena, Sirsi was Circe, Ikkaris was Icarus, Phastos was Hephastos, Gilgamesh was Gilgamesh, etc. The "It was just a story I made up in Athens" was a plain insult to anyone who respected or admired greek/roman/Mesopotamian mythology

[@shrek187]

The movie did have some good representation of diversity. It had a diverse group of people that came together and disliked the movie.

[@aduckwithayoutubechannel]

I feel like this would’ve worked better as a Disney+ series. We could’ve seen the characters fleshed out from when they arrived on Earth, there battles throughout the centuries and finally ending with the events in this movie.

[@bryanaker4338]

I thought the very same thing. They needed time to develop the characters properly.

[@sainteagle4426]

Agreed, and it would've probably gotten more exposure that way cuz more people would stream it as compared to those who went to watch the movie.

[@TheDive99]

Agreed. never saw the movie but with a a cast this large it would definitely serve it well.

[@edcaous]

It would have made more sense as an X-men movie.

[@ditchfood8047]

I thought it was a series at first.

[@vector12yearsago41]

SPOILER: I love how ikaris’ and cerci’s romance is just him following her around

[@hunterreed9049]

Right?! Ikarus had the personality of a cardboard box.

[@vector12yearsago41]

@@hunterreed9049 felt like a dc movie, it should have been 2 films or at least a series, because there were almost too many ideas eg sprites age, the celestials, the marriage, the betrayal, the deviants, and none were explain well enough

[@hunterreed9049]

@@vector12yearsago41 I agree. Nothing really held any weight in the movie. I didn’t care about the characters. When they have these inconsistencies like Druig wanting to end the wars and have people live in peace but then in modern day he’s basically mind controlling everyone in the forest to “keep the peace”. I could have missed something about that but Idk it just wasn’t for me.

[@smitra5901]

Ikrrr?! For all the thousand years old lovers they lacked the chemistry so much. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@lyminusshafiq6067]

@@vector12yearsago41 or they could do the eternals as a team like the power rangers or fantastic 4 or something, doing each char is not enough to introduce them in 1 movie. It become boring because we keep changing char in the movie and not a focused 1 pov which make us keep resetting our mind to understand what is going on

[@zombieinkhakis6891]

I’ve been watching basically all your videos and went into eternals kind of thinking about what you talk about and what makes a good movie. I actually liked it in some ways but was pretty frustrated that it felt like a lot of it was 75% of the way there. So many cool things in there and awesome concepts but they just either weren’t properly explored or they were but they weren’t set up well so we don’t care enough about them. If this was split into two movies and done a little differently with a different scope and much better character development and introduction to the world of eternals and celestials it could have been an amazing set of movies

[@Deuter14.2]

This is what happens when AI and CGI is 100 depended on, rather than good writers, honest morals, and timeless stoicism.

[@ViperChief117]

You can’t polish a turd. This movie looked boring from the trailers. lol

[@mozan33r71]

aCTUaaaLY YOu CaN. Well, turds at least have some nutritional value to bugs and flowers. This thing that I haven't even bothered to watch is based on a trailer. This has no value.

[@gabgamerk.5270]

You can only flush it away

[@sibusiso2841]

@@mozan33r71 Mythbusters

[@Dualis58]

Yes you can.

[@user-or6yn8pm3c]

Marvel overplayed its hand it started off strong with Iron Man and ended strong with Endgame. DC looking better now.

[@jonasdiaz8615]

Any film’s mistakes can be ironed over by a cast of characters that you feel invested in and want to actively root for. It’s difficult to do so when you bring a cast of 10 for the first time that’s a dysfunctional family, WHILE doing a “get the gang back to together,” WHILE trying to do a murder mystery, WHILE trying to do a sci-fi epic, WHILE analyzing how worth saving humanity is. That’s a lot to handle, but nah it’ll be fine!

[@glendarjj3991]

That's all marvel has for today. Go away now.

[@radovanobal3842]

Didn't they send 8 people to rescue private Ryan? Let's not excuse the poop with number of the cast.

[@eduardochavacano]

actors who are not ugly would be a simple formula.

[@jonasdiaz8615]

@Клифф Близински Oh yeah, just realized how well it fits, but Watchmen has a much tighter cast than this one

[@redhairdavid]

@Клифф Близински I liked both, thought they had a lot of similarities to.

[@MegaElgreco]

Did they ever explain why an Eternal (robot) was created deaf? I got 0 background of how she survived for 1000s of years with no ASL or way of communicating and how she became deaf. Was it just we need a disability so toss it in with no background or story arc? I guess that sums up the movie.

[@salleymudd5488]

*Forcing a good writer to check off a list of "identities" as they write and expecting a Blockbuster film is like forcing Da Vinci to paint by numbers and expecting the Mona Lisa.*

[@LunaticFringeReviews]

They focused more on things like “inclusion”, “representation”, and “diversity” instead of “fun”

[@joseskariakochumuttam9366]

no they didnt what

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

Too be fair even if the characters were comic accurate this movie would still flop. Though the diversity thing really wasn't needed.

[@kyotheman69]

or at lease a "story"

[@bryanneideffer6368]

Come now indoctrination is the goal it’s a more “ Moral * honorable way be amazed dang it Amazed!

[@Boomslayer19]

You can even see this in there director and actor choices there is a reason meritocracy works

[@Darkgun231]

A question: If the Earth was supposed to become another Celestial, wouldn't Starlord's Dad have known, or at least noticed, when he was planting his spores?

[@alfredpennyworth177]

Exactly.

[@noobie1890]

You’re making too much sense

[@anthonyallmond3682]

Yeah phase 4 was a disaster the only ones I liked were Shang chi and Loki

[@6kine6tic67]

Its called lazy writing. Questions be damned this is diversity!!

[@Ben-vg6ox]

Stop making so much sense we're in the modern day now 😆

[@Liverator]

My favorite part is when the Mind Control Guy argues that Dimentia Lady should be given a choice whether her memory gets wiped or not, then he immediately goes on to mind control a horde of people, thereby removing THEIR choice. Though runner ups were when - Celestial Guy comes to Earth in the end credits scene, tells protagonist girl that he won't destroy Earth, and then procedes to tell the protagonist girl that he will probe her memories to decide if he will destroy Earth. - Dementia Lady's dementia is said to be because she's remembering the previous planets that got destroyed and is trying to kill the other Eternals to stop the Celestial from awakening. Then she still tries to kill them even when she knows that they are trying to stop the Celestial from awakening - Deviant Antagonist claims to have assimilated all of Punchy-man's memories, says that he wants to protect his deviant race, then proceeds to try and kill the Eternals in the climax when he know that they are trying to stop a world ending event that would annihilate the remaining deviants on Earth.

[@dama301]

Top comment

[@JESL_TheOnlyOne]

I have to admit you make some good observations. My standards for comic book movies might be relaxed, but I do have some, and you pointed out a couple of plot points that are really kind of stupid.

[@stiltywilton]

There are also way too many Avengers Assemble! moments, where the characters all do the superhero strut and get into a line and stare off into the distance. From a practical perspective, it helps the audience to see all the Eternals in a row in various shots, so you don't forget who they are. On the other hand, it makes me feel as though I'm watching the Eternals do a runway show by Edna Mode.

[@piotrd.4850]

Curiously, in movie where said squad member die and depart on route - permanently.

[@WorldsOkayestSorcerer]

NO CAPES!

[@noteimporta2880]

That was the trailer so what did you expect lol.

[@alonzogonzalez4272]

@@noteimporta2880 Trailer was also trash.

[@noteimporta2880]

@@alonzogonzalez4272 thats what I'm saying

[@sammurphy4159]

"It's been a fun 10 years, but the fun is definitely over" Couldn't agree more

[@chasehedges6775]

👍👍👍👍💯💯💯💯

[@antonioorsome]

@WiiManElite spider man will save it but after that idk

[@magic8340]

There was fun with the MCU movies???

[@squidward-kun]

@@magic8340 Lmao for real, they were all so dumb

[@david7800]

endgame is goated compared to this

[@Query_8P]

Your voice always reminds me of the early days of homestuck. Not in a bad way I think someone with a similar accent used to do a let's read version of it online; Listening to your videos is nostalgic and soothing and helps me clean and tidy up, I am so grateful TTvTT

[@yabada7866]

First time I watched this movie, I thouth I know why I didn't like it, but after listening you, I realized there are much more things that are bad in this movie.

[@jayess8714]

They spent the whole movie building up that super-ultron-deviant for nothing - killed him instantly and I was like "Uhhh... ok..."

[@3takoyakis]

bcs they didnt know that they are basically farmer in earth fighting against pest-viant but it didnt makes sense, if they LOVE earth that much, they should rise against ultron, thanos or any genocider in human history and ignoring 'deviant only' rules i mean their power arent locked to only fighting deviant, they can unleash it anytime they want

[@yevgeniyaleshchenko849]

@@3takoyakis Right

[@lukesimon2227]

Yo when they killed him i was like wtf

[@torrancemoore6152]

I hated that so much but then again the deviants weren't given the character development they should've gotten either

[@Myrkzz]

they are building up a future deviant that has say taken 50 eternals powers from world to world

[@Sultan-cf5wf]

Criticism is getting deflected as "Haters don't like it when a woman directs!" Then explain why 2017's Wonder Woman got such high praise.

[@Michael-le5ph]

it's not criticism. It's trying to make people on socail media conform to your views. Critics were shocked when audiences gave it positive reviews. After all, WE must ALL think like critics. The movies they do like are dumb as crap.

[@cincydooley]

@James Scott Somehow, clueless still stands up. It’s such a product of its time, but it’s stil so funny.

[@N0URii]

And Loki is good, yea they put some woke shit on it but eternals just worse

[@gianthand8130]

I noticed people tend to either keep quiet or change the topic whenever the 2017 Wonder Woman movie gets brought up.

[@sayithowitis470]

Tbh , black panther was pretty shite too ... got over the top praise cause of its full black cast and nobody had the balls to call it mediocre in case they got called racist .

[@steamytree7951]

I was shocked that the audience score was THAT high. I've never heard anyone genuinly say a good thing about it

[@stephenmosack4496]

What I got from this experience is that I’m supposed to wonder… What if I were a chicken… … raised only to feed a master. Who can save me? But I’m hi as a duck

[@te-legram-TheCriticalDrinker5]

SEASON GREETINGS 🎄 CONTACT ME FOR YOUR REWARD 🏆📦......

[@heraldofwar]

The excuses they are going to invent defending this film will be more entertaining than the film itself.

[@elpretender1357]

I'm already expecting one of those "What about the themes?" film critics to defend it.

[@Contractor48]

What surprises me is that the audience score is pretty good. Was there a reason to that?

[@neutronstarpilot4393]

So you mine things so you can craft things to mine? You can nit pick anything, why do you feel people need to bend over backwards to defend a film, this was fine. But this guy is not going to get much content from a "meh that was ok I geuss" Hence the video, I feel his fans shouldn't take him so seriously.

[@scifiwriter98]

We can expect to hear the words "racism" and "bigotry" a lot.

[@amxaas4450]

It will probably start with something in the lines of "We are proud with the end result of the project and the team did so well in putting their all into this passion project".

[@mkocel]

"we were instructed to only fight the deviants" - Thanos is half deviant.

[@mish375]

If wiping out half the universe doesn't get their attention, then nothing should. Terrible writing.

[@mkocel]

@@mish375 Right? like what if the snap wiped out that planet sized fetus they're supposed to protect? OOPS. LOL

[@mish375]

@@mkocel Like, whoops, we failed. Pretty sure the Celestials wouldn't be pleased with that. The Eternals had one job.

[@Lifeof728]

Not sure they are going with the half Deviant Gene in the Mcu. Also only Two of the Eternals knew the "real" reason for their existence.

[@GloriousSquizoKing.]

@@mkocel And if Ultron succeeded on dropping the city, they would also be fucked because there's no more inteligent on the planet.

[@justsomejerseydevilwithint4606]

2:28 Oddly enough, thanos wiping out half the universe would be strangely beneficial to The Eternals; They get to wipe out what remains of the Deviants with 50% more ease, assuming they live the snap. So, logically, they should have allied with thanos, and either secured their "No-dusting" passes, or convince him to eliminate all the deviants for the betterment of balance. Realistically, Thanos' Plan affects them just as much as the rest of the universe. Then again, they are robots sticking to their programming to a fault, I suppose.

[@liamphibia]

*Groooooaaaaaan* 😵

[@capthavic]

Yeah the excuse for them not doing anything about Thanos, etc. makes absolutely zero sense if you put even a second of thought into it. And the Eternals being so diverse doesn't mesh with their goals. Like I don't see how having a mute or one stuck as a child forever benefits their job farming lifeforms. It's like the TVA all over again.

[@Dustbinlid1]

10 Eternals, 10 chances at being able to sell spin-offs.

[@xlortiz]

thank god it's "DIVERSE"

[@SeagullsGather]

10 action figures and as many as 10 markets - sorry countries - you can pander to with some location shots.

[@Kadejones01]

Well, apart from the eternal child. It’d have to be a new kid actor every movie.

[@vassilev1985]

U mean 10 failed chances I assume

[@12abax]

10 money grabbers lost

[@himayamata]

You know, they could have made this movie about Thanos and how he became the mad titan. Better yet, how did Thanos acquire the Mind Stone in the first place? Remember the scepter that Loki used in the first Avengers movie? It was given by Thanos.

[@ziabatsu4422]

Angelina Jolie used to be something, I guess, but that was 20 years ago. Also, the character "Sprite" was already created in Interview with The Vampire. Blatant ripoff

[@flyinpigmusic331]

I finally watched this. Here's my review: it was boring as hell. I couldn't get invested in the characters or story. By the time it got to the climax, I couldn't be bothered to care if the protagonists won or not.

[@raygillette7446]

I too watched it this weekend, feel asleep an hour in and didn’t bother to go back to see what I missed

[@pisachit7407]

The first Marvel movie where my kids have asked when it was going to be over. Can't think of a more stinging criticism than that.

[@NickPCage]

I wanted the celestial to be born ..would of loved to see earth blow up.

[@aaronclark5381]

Have you ever thought to read up on the characters before entering in a marvel movie. All these characters are based on comics. This movie was actually very well made if you had any understanding of the concepts before you watched it.

[@VladGrim]

I was hoping they lost lol. Or got replaced. They're broken tools who can't do their jobs anymore

[@perseusjoppa426]

They promoted this film's "diversity", "inclusion" and "representation" as its main assets and strengths, but the factual truth is that only a very small percentage of humanity cares about those things (as noisy and vocal as these people may be). The overwhelming majority of people want good stories, endearing and solidly developed characters, and pure escapism and entertainment, not lectures on ideologies that only interest a few and clearly ruin it all in their path.

[@masontrupe9047]

Underrated comment.

[@aydinhyder3387]

It had all of that lol stop hating

[@redroverredrover679]

Str8 faX

[@mikespike2099]

MCU Thinking These Days: Latest Oscar Director + Famous Actors + Massive CGI budget = Popular Movie 🙃

[@dindajgnmrh2177]

Hollywood is woke man

[@pastywhite6669]

The "technical difficulties" banner NEVER gets old.

[@permeus2nd]

Sadly even thought the MCU dosnt acknowledge it this film has ended all life on earth, that celestial would still cause global devastation even after they stopped it.

[@eastern2western]

Zhao even admitted the whole movie was an intense film school experience for her. Basically, she had no idea what she was doing.

[@mveytia]

Totally not true. She clearly has talent, she's just a bit green for a movie of this size and scope.

[@eastern2western]

@@mveytia for small independent movies, she can handle them without much problems. Eternals is.a.movie that requires introduction of multiple characters, heavy effects and its relationship with the main mcu universe. For a newbie came directly from.independant films, she simple could not handle a project with such massive proportions.

[@anthonyallmond3682]

@@eastern2western and she was basically asked to repeat James Gunn success with guardians of the galaxy

[@evertonporter7887]

I say all new directors should get their first break. She'll learn from this experience, as we all did when we first started our first big jobs.

[@PompeySomerstown]

@@evertonporter7887 Indeed, I've directed 2 no-budget features. I should definitely be put in charge of a multi-million-dollar superhero movie!

[@vincentehernandez4762]

I “WOKE” up half way through the movie only to discover I eternally regretted it

[@jojosoni]

nice puns

[@bottlethrower1544]

You sir are a gentleman and a scholar. I salute you!

[@anuragchowdhury4101]

Gold Comment

[@ericambrose7024]

I see what you did there.

[@jesusalejandrogutierrezsul9625]

Take your like, Shakespeare!

[@dandannation9352]

The best thing about this film was definitely the action. Whenever powers or fighting were used, at least it looks cool. Especially the speedster

[@Dracogame]

My ex liked every fucking Marvel movie. She even liked Black Widow. A lot. When she told me this film was “meh”, I immediately knew they fucked up.

[@mrinvisible9175]

Widow was … good… captain marvel was awful.

[@rdubayoo]

"We're Marvel, we can do no wrong!" Everything you need to know about why they made this movie.

[@MrSGL21]

pretty much. i realized the dc fan boys where right when they said marvel fans will watch anything no matter how bad it is when i sat there through capt marvel and it made 1.3 billion dollars.

[@jw8160]

Shouldn’t that be we are Disney we can do no wrong?

[@toby2581]

It's the cycle of everything - talented people manage to catch the public imagination with something fun and well-made, then the reins are handed to talentless hacks who think it's their birthright to be as successful as those who laid the groundwork.

[@rdubayoo]

@@jw8160 Perhaps, but it's especially bad on the Marvel side of things.

[@rajarshisantra8203]

@@jw8160 well, whichever floats your boat

[@miketacos9034]

I saw an article saying the Eternals would disrupt Dune’s success. Lmao

[@Ghodzilla]

Eternals made 72M this weekend, Dune made 7M.

[@everynametaken]

@@Ghodzilla Eternals came out this weekend, Dune has been out for two weeks now. Not surprising.

[@DoofusChungus]

@@Ghodzilla wait... 72 mil for a marvel movie? Lmao thats sad

[@Grasslander]

@@Ghodzilla People will still watch Dune a decade from now when everyone has forgotten The Eternals.

[@WimukthiBandara]

@@Grasslander That's a streatch thinking it will take ten years for people to forget about The Eternals

[@ValiduzZ]

Started this "Movie" thinking it was a TV-Show. Towards the end i was like "This is so messy. But i guess its okay for a pilot episode that tries to start as many stories as possible to branch out later." . . . "OHSHITITSAMOVIE?!"

[@megawave79]

its a good idea and kinda okay plot but just so poorly done. even from the choice of making it a movie and not a season long series where we can connect with the characters, get a better understanding of whats happening, more explanations, etc.

[@sagefields]

Hey, this movie was great. It finally cured me of my insomnia.

[@hyboirds1536]

I do sometimes enjoy when a new movie like this comes out, they do have a magical way of putting me to sleep in minutes when usually I can't get an hour of sleep to save my life.

[@TheLoos3Goos33]

They're just making me happier that I stopped caring after Endgame.

[@HiddenHandMedia]

Shit. I stopped caring during Endgame

[@macethorns1168]

Hell, I stopped caring *during* Endgame with the dude talking about dating other guys and the stupid ASS female empowerment moment shoehorned in.

[@Michael-le5ph]

there hasent been much since endgame. what planet are you from?

[@maxim196]

@@macethorns1168Oh yeah...dismiss an entire movie because of only two scenes ...smh

[@thorodinson9782]

@@Michael-le5ph there has been a lot since endgame. Open your eyes

[@jorgea8518]

I don't know, I honestly didn't hate the movie, I did kind of like it, but again, I said kind of like it because it does have problems. Because there's too many characters in this movie, they don't get enough development for us to care about them, I can see that they tried and unlike other films that have too many underdeveloped characters, I give this movie props for at least trying, but it wasn't enough. I was not a fan of the whole going back and forth to tell the story, it gave me a Man of Steel feel to it, and made it a bit of a mess just like in Man of Steel. Characters do have their own personality at least, the action is well done, it looks nice, it does have its funny moments, and the story was quite compelling that it made interested to see where it was going, even if the end results weren't particularly great. So while not one of my favorite MCU movies, I would still take it over Captain Marvel, the first two thor movies and Avengers 2 Age of Ultron any day. Its a 7/10 for me.

[@noturbusiness9736]

The number of ‘cool ideas’ they tried to fit into this movie rivals that of the number of characters. It should have started as a series to introduce the characters so people could actually know who they are, let alone care about them. The evolving deviant would be a better fit as a serial antagonist. It could all lead up to their realization of the emergence and what their true purpose is. Then have it lead into the movie where they face the moral dilemma or something. Not a super original idea but likely would have done better that way. It’s funny how by trying to fit so many concepts into the short runtime it just seemed to move so slowly.

[@captbuckyohare5585]

If you go back and watch the very first trailer for Iron Man, when Marvel had to earn and graft for your attention, it spends 2/3s of its runtime establishing who Tony Stark is, his personality, his job, his flaws, his humour, and then it hits you with the inciting incident that changes him forever. It gives you reasons to care about him, the bastard that he clearly is, and shows just enough of the film's driving plot points to give you an idea of where it might go, before it wallops you in the last 30 seconds with the action, the armour, and soundtrack. It gives you reasons to want to follow the character and see how his story unfolds. Now compare that to the new Phase 4 characters, and you'll see the marketing is focussed solely on the brand, worldbuilding, and the promise of spectacle. The promise of a new Marvel thing, instead of selling characters. Because it's about the brand now, not the characters. So just open wide and consume the product.

[@princebubby]

Also, Robert Downey Jnr did a superb job as a the lead character. Likewise Jon Favreau as director. Does the Eternals have anyone of that caliber?

[@nuncio21]

Nailed it, man!

[@captbuckyohare5585]

@@princebubby Exactly. In the trailer's first scene: Reporter: Mr Stark, you've been called the Di Vinci of our time. What do you say to that? Stark: Absolutely ridiculous. I don't paint. Reporter (smirking): You've also been called the Merchant of Death. Stark: That's not bad. Look at how much we learn here and all of it sold by RDJ brilliantly. After 10 seconds I'm already in.

[@princebubby]

@@captbuckyohare5585 Yes. That's talent on display, in front of the camera and behind it: acting, directing, writing ...

[@solaireofastora6173]

I really don't like the new trajectory of this new phase of the mcu, the directors gained a bad habit from captain marvel that consists of selling us bad movies just because they will have importance later on and they began to introduce too forced concepts such as all of the time travel bullshit

[@assmuddafukkinhole2]

*"There's romance, rivalries, friendships, secrets, betrayals, moral dilemmas, epic historical events, world-changing conflicts, humor, comradery, emotional trauma..."* Luckily you can get all that with Tatyana, at half the cost and time.

[@esp-music]

but with twice the STD's

[@assmuddafukkinhole2]

@@esp-music better than being woke or having TDS, I guess lol.

[@SoulSir5vr]

@@esp-music Nah! It'll be fine!!!!

[@zerryborger4246]

“Having a diverse cast isn’t a bad thing, doesn’t protect a shitty movie.” Well said Drinker

[@davidanderson2357]

So the climax of the movie sees this enormous (thousands of feet tall?) Celestial somehow petrified into place as it emerges from the ocean. AND NO MARVEL MOVIE AFTERWARD MAKES REFERENCE TO THIS EVENT.

[@nugzin5742]

Thanos is an Eternal with Deviant genes so technically the Eternals should have been doubly involved in stopping him. Edit: the Deviant gene is definitely a thing in the MCU because Thanos is from Titan (the eternals homeworld) and his brother Eros (played by Harry styles) is an Eternal but without the Deviant gene, so only one of them inherited the gene.

[@cruelpulse]

This film is dumb and looks like garbage, but there's no reason to bring up stuff from the comics to criticize its logic. It's quite possible the Diviant gene isn't a thing in the film's universe?

[@benedictjajo]

@@cruelpulse still doesn't explain the fact that the eternals are supposed to help the humans and they knew Thanos could wipe half of the human population by the snap of his finger if he won. Where were they then?

[@Mpiewizard]

@@cruelpulse considering Thanos’s brother is now being played by Harry Styles whom they made no effort to look any different then he usually does, I’d say the deviant gene is still canon in the MCU.

[@tenchraven]

That would require the writers to actually be familiar with the lore for characters which most Marvel fans have either never heard of or care eff all about.

[@BiggusDickus.]

@@cruelpulse Not everything in comics and movies are Sky and Ground difference.

[@FromtheHerts81]

An immortal female trapped in a girl’s body longing to feel adult desire could be considered dodgy!

[@hippiegamer112]

Sounds like a Discord moderator's fantasy.

[@grammarnazi4980]

Excellent comments right here

[@BWMagus]

It is an interesting idea, since so many people have this odd view that, apparently, folks under the age of 18 by even a single day, especially young ladies, are all innocent babies, but reaching legal age suddenly results in a huge mental and emotional shift overnight where all bets are off. The idea that, holy shit, someone who doesn't LOOK 18 might have ideas and thoughts and proclivities of an adult seems impossible to some, and it would be an interesting problem for characters to overcome.

[@kay_keik7842]

@@BWMagus but lets be honest thats not the intention here with this character and more like the joke thats made in a lot of anime/manga of the little girl thats "a 5000 year old dragon so its okay "

[@evertonporter7887]

Sounds like today's adults longing for their childhoods again.

[@urielraven-frost8714]

Late, but the whole "can't intervine" excuse could have instead been "The Eternals and Deviants were reactivated/reawakened due to Endgame's snap". There, solved it in like five seconds while fried. T-T

[@user-rn9qy9um2h]

A major problem i had with this movie was that there were no stakes. Everyone knew the celestial would be stopped, if the earth was destroyed their be no MCU or any further movies, people aren’t stupid enough to think that the celestial will birth and the entirety of the MCU ends right there. There were also no internal conflicts or smaller external conflicts to make anyone care about the characters.

[@dinbabwa452]

Um... the stakes are will they kill it or sleep it. The real conflict was a moral one and Icarus proved to win against the real antagonist his own prior beliefs. I don't think he should have offed himself though.

[@screenname8267]

"Having a diverse cast is not a magical shield you can use to protect your movie from criticism" TLJ: Have we met?

[@matthewronson5218]

Yep. They think "diversity" gives their tripe plot armor and a shield against criticisms when the project fails.

[@hiamaraldvaan7221]

Nice

[@cm9241]

@WiiManElite you don't know what communism is.

[@jjbanana2774]

@@cm9241 that is exactly what communism does. Destroys culture and force you to believe in "the message" which turns into the doctrine of the ruling party.

[@Sentinel82]

@@cm9241 Everyone knows what Communism is. It's what happens when some rich f*** wit with no life experience comes to be in charge of a country and think they can make the universe "fair". It's also what murdered millions in the 20th century. Not much more needs to be said about it.

[@listless22]

My favorite part of the movie was when character A looked off into the distance as the sun set for the next 5 minutes. It was such a contrast from when character B did it 5 minutes ago!

[@Wingedmagician]

You could make a calendar with those shots

[@listless22]

@@Wingedmagician They would make an honestly quite nice calendar! I thought the vfx in the movie were as good as I've seen anywhere.

[@talltroll7092]

Maybe it's secretly just a giant, group co-application for a chance at being in a Depeche Mode music video

[@beautyforashes2022]

Perfume commercial.

[@blueshattrick]

@@talltroll7092 Enjoy The Silence was in phase zero of the MCU

[@IstariAzul777]

Why did they make salma so ridiculously weak and helpless?! Should have at least presented her bosom more effectively

[@starkraver-7938]

The dumbest thing about this movie: if the eternals are artificially constructed, why the hell was one made so much stronger than the others!!?? Would have been a much shorter movie if he wasn't the one that turned against the rest. And if they could make an eternal that powerful, why weren't they all made at that level?

[@johans-l9794]

I think that's a parallel to the bible. Samael God best Angel who become lucifer. But here it's the opposite since God is here the celestial. But it should have been 3 movies. 1) origin story: see all their traumas and why one is that strong. End scene teasing he will sacrifice the ppl if needed 2) they fight the monsters and discover the truth, and then the strongest and a few others chose to side with the celestial. The "good" ones are deafeated and hide deciding to Ask for human help. 3) they call upon the New Heroes to fight and save mankind. They defeat the celestial. But in its last breath they realize it was afraid of something and you have the next phase set up. That's how I would have done it anyway but I am not a scenarist

[@Grasslander]

They wanted to show that a White man betrayed the non-Whites and women. (While of course the Black man is the great inventor. Not Whites who actually invented things, when Blacks couldn't even invent the wheel or the sail.) So they made him stronger so it would take a while to defeat him, to work on making the audience hate him, evil White man as he is.

[@squoblat]

So, the plot of the Eternals is basically a team of immortal people performing a late term abortion?

[@luchomscyfy]

You are not wrong.

[@usuariosarcastico512]

Was the "it's okay to kill a innocent baby to allegedly save other people" nonsense, with "the monsters aren't really bad even though they are trying to kill innocent people" "subversion of expectation" everyone who watched any movie in the last ten years could easily predict.

[@Yozzer72]

😂😂

[@luchomscyfy]

@@usuariosarcastico512 the worse: nothing is important in this movie. It's like, showing these themes or hard subjects, it's just a "to-do" list. It's not a movie, it's just like a list of things you can put in a movie to make it look "deep" or having some "real world" issues. But it doesn't care, because is presented with the immaturity of a 12-years old kid. Or a Twitter user.

[@CommanderOfTheSun]

Avenger: I struggle with a rage problem. I'm forced to walk the planet alone, because of the monster inside me. I've left loved ones and friends behind, and I'm constantly being hunted. All I want to do is help people... but that always leads to me hurting people. It beats me down to the point where i've tried to take my own life in order to end this nightmare. But I cannot. I just wish people would understand me. Eternal: I'm fat, black, and gay.

[@davidkane1658]

Lol...nice

[@lunch2102]

That was beautiful

[@knightheaven8992]

The Hollywood cliché, of the non threatening black man.

[@theniceguy7824]

Truth

[@neutronstarpilot4393]

Didn't he feel guilty for his part in developing the technology for the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki?

[@peterteddy3367]

I just don't understand why Falcon and the winter soldier was stretched out into a 6 hour series while clearly not having enough plot to support more than a 2 hour movie while this story which clearly needed more time was crammed into a two hour movie

[@Conradlovesjoy]

We all know why they created an adult female trapped in a child’s body…

[@icbm7]

There was A LOT of potential: the deviant "smart" bad guy, the whole Icarus betrayal, Athena's madness, even the Cersei & Icarus vs. Cersei & the KitH character. All of these story-line opportunities were mishandled. This is down to the director, and possibly the writers, and certainly the studio. As I sat in the theater, I realized that I was watching 3 openings to the movie, and this had me concerned that "they" didn't know what they wanted from the film, and by then end this concern was confirmed.

[@sillythao3513]

i absolutely agree. I thought everything was just so out of place with the contsant flashbacks and honestly it felt like only makkari and druig had chemistry

[@pdannysan13]

The movie basically started after 1h30min.

[@JollyOliW]

The only thing I truly loved about the film was the fight scenes, but then again it's marvel so that is in all films meaning it needs more to stand out among the rest

[@sillythao3513]

@@JollyOliW and the fact that there were barely any😭😭😭

[@lillrice27]

Yeah this movie had so much potential, too bad they took it the wrong direction, I really liked the cast and fights too

[@RobbysLobbyHobbyGaming]

This movie was one of the slowest paced most boring movies I have ever watched. Watchmen was the same pace but it was much much much better in every way possible.

[@radicalsnake2813]

Watchmen had a lot of characters but they were all memorable in their way. In Eternals all characters are so poor...

[@madavarams268]

The first quarter felt too rushed for me. dunno if an editing problem but scenes shifted drastically from one tot another. And it dragged to a halt in the thena in the desert scene

[@Paulafan5]

@DarthRevan66 Justice League was worse because it had iconic characters that people actually liked instead of D-list characters that most comic book fans have never heard of before.

[@BoredomandVanity]

The watchmen was so confusing

[@reedr7142]

The laughing at the beginning was so contagious. Thank you for that.

[@TylerAStinson]

The only good thing Blade’s back

[@wrongthinker843]

That "adult desires in a child's body" is some heavy cringe that should put the writer on a list. A child's body cannot experience the only specifically "adult desires" that it would lack the ability to act upon.

[@daveeyes]

Knock, knock, this is the FBI investigating child porn in films...

[@CsDanex21]

It's literally a character in the comics by jack kirby. So yeah of course they'd touch on it. and there are a number people in real life that have rare diseases that stunt their aging or growth and they look like children or teenagers even though they are much older. It's a dilemma because they can never have normal relationships. It wouldn't make sense for them to ignore that crucial part of the character.

[@CynicalOldDwarf]

Characters like Sprite (and Monster Girl from Invincible) basically exists to 'please' the "But she's really 6,000 years old!!" neckbeard coomer types. But lets be honest, is this any surprise in a decade where Cuties already exists??

[@23093034]

There's enough peados in Hollywood to want such a character.

[@nebiros_at9473]

Shit Batman TAS touched on the idea. She went crazy from always being treated like a kid and took hostages.