Bill Burr & Nia - Back To School Dating Advice

billburr.com/ and www.allthingscomedy.com/

[@KeishenLloyd]

4:03 "HEY NIA, CAN YOU HELP THIS KID GET LAID?" Fantastic.

[@larrymcjones]

Makes me laugh every single time lmao

[@TheRubidiy]

"Hey, Nia! Can you help that kid to get laid?!" Laughed my ass off ))))))))))))))))))))

[@ethanuncensored]

I know, that was the epitome of awesomeness.

[@SugarStrangler]

"Hey baby you should see our 7-11" lmfaooo

[@GAZAMAN93X]

Goodfella 7/11 was a part time job.

[@MotherViksChaat]

Jill's Sandwiches boo👎

[@spettit2011]

I wish Billy Bald Balls was my school counselor when I went to school.

[@dariusp6969]

For real imagine someone that has actual life experience instead of some person that took a course for 4 years

[@popcorn20995351]

lower your standard. in high school you want the prettiest girl. when you get older you realize I missed out on some sweet walls

[@seanforbes3937]

100%

[@FRANCO-cm7ol]

good advice

[@mightymoeish]

never miss out on the freaks

[@RSD22.]

legend comment

[@theguywhoisaustralian1465]

Sweet walls being a vagina?

[@joemanco1075]

I never thought "oh this podcast would be much more entertaining with Bill's wife" but hell, it kind of is

[@upcoming3341]

"I didn't like what your face was saying to me, so I told it to shut up." I fucking love Nia!!

[@laralogan8939]

i love nia and bill!!! had a good laugh...

[@ExBruinsFan]

Will you still love Nia after she fucks him in divorce court?

[@laralogan8939]

ExBruinsFan if they decide to screw each other in a divorce court it is not your headache...

[@1ceYourPimpHand]

ExBruinsFan Is she going to take his empty pizza boxes and his Prius?

[@ExBruinsFan]

1ceYourPimpHand He's rich, now, Dude. Not _Kobe Bryant_ rich, of course.

[@skageschei131]

Please keep Nia on the podcast!!

[@Crawlerjamie]

Skage Schei NO FUCK NO LESS NIA MORE BILL

[@ovnbun1981]

I enjoy them both, and I appreciate Nia's inputs from time to time.

[@tovsteh]

What? Nia is hilarious and together they make a great podcast duo.

[@tovsteh]

@Steve Odin yea she can be a bit of a feminazi at times. A product of being a privileged middle class woman.

[@burpostockings]

I love when Nia is on. She acts like such a priviledged brat, but Bill always knocks her down a peg, and she ends up agreeing. Both of them together are hilarious

[@nickleone9635]

Nia is right cause I used to never be able to get girls to date me until I got comfortable with myself cause girls respond to confidence but not hubris

[@ilyasantonov212]

Glad you figured it out dude 👍

[@adams1458]

"Hey baby, I'm from the next town over, you should see our 7-11" I'm using that lmao then Hey sally!! Nice Fucking Rack!

[@Deyone_Jackson]

*I KNEW SHE CALLS HIM B-B I KNEW IT* 😂

[@yellowzoiid]

Wtf

[@ianmccullough5910]

Billy Freckles.... The man without a country.... I'm freaking crackin up at work lmao!!

[@steve9341]

"I was 'ol Billy Freckles."

[@lukebennett1648]

"hey let's cut the bullshit, my place is just round the corner" lmao

[@blakebetsworth9869]

Join the track team, as long as it mixed-sex which is typical. You meet a wide rang of girls from your school in an athletic environment, but the best part is a track meets. They last so damn long and there's always down time to meet girls from other schools.

[@treymccolley6624]

You guys are my goal relationship.. sooo funny together..

[@jevaunegordon]

"Hey Sally, nice dress" LOOOL

[@tracystephens5014]

The Amazon Uber one with Nia is absolutely hilarious

[@swill1020]

Tracy Stephens ... Hey EVERYONE, want to make some money??

[@jamieholmes5443]

HAHAHAH! I didn't like what your face was saying to me so I told it to shut up. That's why they are a togheter!

[@slobonmyfilmsnob]

Dammit, bill puts me in a good mood without fail, everytime.

[@15aac]

"Alright beat it" hahaha

[@brsvideos8143]

There needs to be a "when you're" meme for when Bill calls Nia into the podcast.

[@Blackphillipsupporter]

I didn’t get laid till my 19th b day. I literally did the same thing Bill advised against. I tried to be friends with them first and immediately got friend zoned. Learned afterwards that all ya have to do is charm/flirt and just go for it when the time comes

[@mrnathanLL]

8:36 bit had me crying

[@patriot459]

Hey what book you reading? Umm 😐 Harry Potter. Yeah? 😂😂

[@EnigmaEcliptic]

compliment their shoes. they have a thing with this shit.

[@joshualeija9984]

He compared his high school time to a wasteland lol.

[@Blazorbust]

"Hey Sally, nice dress" See it ain't that easy is it :p

[@mrimpressions3158]

“What book ya readin’” “Uh fackin Harry potah” “Yeah!!”

[@pwrinklejohnson9782]

The next time she says something especially funny...give her your sweetest look and smile and say"you are just too cute,I like you" then say you have to go but you'll catch her later. AND make sure to look back at her as you walk away. Men in general don't feel the need to look back and get one more glimpse so if she can catch you doing that...bam! Best of luck to you!

[@fightingmedialounge519]

What type of romecom are you referencing.

[@jonavuka]

so fucking corny holy shit

[@RockPhonic]

"Hey, you wanna see our 7/11 baby"

[@Elonpocalyps420]

My female friend once picked up a guy by telling him she messed around with one of his friends. That was her opener and they were together for over a year

[@patersonjross]

Hey Sally...nice dress!

[@juliodelacruz1678]

“Hey Sally, nice dress”

[@norse8825]

Not so sure that 'friend zone' is static. Once they see you getting it on with other women outside the zone, their instincts will start to kick in.

[@russbelperez3837]

DAMN ur not lying

[@quisthegreat6538]

They missed the whole point he doesnt have trouble meeting them

[@sakurad49]

I agree 100% with Nia xD

[@tonywords6713]

most of mine started as friends which i seriously regret progressing because they were pretty cool friends. theres no un-crossing that bridge for the most part

[@xsteveconwayx]

"Hey, Sally. Nice dress. I hope it's stain resistant cuz you're gonna need it this Friday night."

[@gerrickwhisenant5331]

Hey sally that dress fits your form nicely

[@letsgobrandon136]

As far as the just walking up and asking for it like bill was talking about ive saw friends over the years use this method and it work. I learned over the years how to do it myself but I'll admit it has a low success rate (about 20%) and you'll get cussed and smacked occasionally but if you straight up ask 10 women to sleep with you and 2 accept the offer is it really that bad of a tactic. It sure beat getting friend zoned all the time

[@themanifestmage]

Best starter I've ever heard as long as the girl has an inkling of confidence. *look at them with a bit of a puzzled look, then with a smile*: Those shoes? Really?

[@matthewlenzmeier9859]

Listen to Black Philip Show.

[@CodysFavorites]

You should see our 7-11 baby lmfao

[@chrissy9153]

Lol I’m only two years older than this kid I’m so happy that I can relate to someone my own age.

[@G1337]

Giving advice in aviation metaphors to a high-schooler? lol

[@danielwillows1699]

He should stream on twitch

[@alastairsmith13]

omg he said i was a man without a country 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 its so true tho

[@JoyfulUniter]

"I was old billy freckles, a man without a country"

[@jamesrucki4558]

It took me till my early 20s to learn a trick in flirting most guys don't seem to know. A one liner is a good flirt and way to check if done correctly. You say a solid one liner to whoever you are hoping to pick up and fall back a good ways but still in sight. Wait and see if you get eye contact or if she appears to be looking for what may be where you went. It's a solid method for guys with lower confidence or fear of rejection and a good method overall. If you get eye contact across the room tho, Go back and talk a bit and don't fuck it up that's all you gotta do and a number or date is basically guaranteed. A good one liner back off and seem occupy yourself while waiting for a check or eye contact. The check is hit and miss tho as they may be looking for other parties, you'll usually know when you walk up to speak again tho. Might be something as small as a smile or a hair tuck or flip. 10 to 20 percent of women tho will watch out for doing these signals and actually be interested tho. See a pretty girl, talk to her. She dosent seem like your type. You save the number and maybe make a booty call of her or you just move on. Rejection ruins some guys, it's best to blow it off tho It's not big deal most attempts by far end in rejection. Doing this method tho I'd say you got an 80% chance or so of not being rejected tho. The one liner can't be a pick up line tho and needs to be rather quick. If done right you can even say a quick line to several women and wonder off a little ways and wait for one to make eye contact. If you are spotted making the one liners by the previous ones tho it tends to hurt your chances tho again a small portion will be the opposite and possibly initiate something. The one that initiates something after seeing you deliver another one liner to another women tho, will usually leave with you very quickly if you just ask and want to leave.

[@jamesrucki4558]

It should be obvious but do not be staring at her until she looks at you and you've made eye contact. A few seconds of a stare at most then and walk up.

[@laserprop]

Tell the kid to ask for advice from the girls' fathers.

[@vuckovicivan]

im cool

[@user-hi7ze9jg7e]

6:50

[@Mannymoke]

they act like it's fucking easy

[@markpalmercomedy]

Love your podcasts bill and your comidy. You and your wife makes great couple 👫 Can't wait till you break up and she takes half your shit we will get some great stand-up material 😊😉

[@LemonTree9280]

Always make them wanting more...wish i wouldve realized that 20 yrs ago

[@MrBlazzin101]

You're looking at it all wrong buddy. You make them laugh you already got your foot in the door

[@gerry_atric]

That 11:10 moment when you imagine yourself hanging out with them. Nia: You blew it Bill: There was nothing to blow Me: That's what she said (*we all laugh til we pop, we become lifelong friends and they set me up with their perfect female companion friend and we hang out happily forever thereafter*)

[@IronHide3910]

this is a beautiful scenario in a perfect world 😂😂😂

[@ambushbob5383]

I had lady friends in high school but they never helped me in that department

[@bharathsf]

I guess bill Burr was like Chandler Bing

[@desmondgrier6432]

I lost my virginity in highschool sophomore year, my advice is try with the older women. My first was a year above me.

[@alexfinn7989]

just some at bats lol

[@lukekerry3195]

Why does bill have a mysterious reverb on his voice? Has he upgraded to an empty mansion for his podcast space or something?

[@ahhcmon9604]

You can't be friends with women. The girls choose you and you just have to follow up after eye contact, look away and see if she's still looking. Even though men have to ask out women in the US the women usually choose you, it's harder to convince a girl to like you but it is possible, just be direct and confident. Don't say hang out, say go out. Just tell her she's pretty, or give her some other compliment

[@RockPhonic]

"HEY SALLY!! NICE FUCKING RACK!!"

[@charliedanaher9827]

How do I write to this guy😂

[@landonic81]

U need to hand deliver a written letter to his house

[@jamesbeasley-stokes9540]

Hey, what's that book you're reading? Fucking Harry Potter 😂

[@Mostafa-rq9rm]

I think you should become friends with a girl initially and then progress. If she doesn't want to progress, end everything with her.

[@MarketResearchReading114]

Nia isn't whiny or annoying unless Bill gets her into one of those ruts and its like "come on dudes, be a little self aware" but with her she feels it so its like ok, lets try to figure out if we can pave this road, so you can make the turn instead of fish tailing. Its an interesting window into seeing what happens when he practices what he preaches. Course its a bit fudged to have the world in on it, but w/e you don't blame a dude who's made his money in farming from smelling like farm.

[@henribergson2167]

Don’t try

[@TheGnurgen]

The problem wasnt that Bill blew it, the problem was she didnt...

[@vampfan7569]

The hair is always a good one, ask if they have done something to their hair. If they have, they will appreciate you noticing, if they haven't you usually get "No, why" and you have an opening to say that she looks different, and start a conversation.

[@theguywhoisaustralian1465]

Here's the thing. Nobody is having good sex in high school.

[@zackk1181]

Girls now in days are coming 2 me saying what do u like ;) but the prob is all the tuna smell btw I'm 12

[@thelastviking2039]

You guys are too old for this, sorry lol since he is a bit weird, go to a party and see a girl making eyes at you. Wait a few minutes go up to her compliment one thing and let her start talking. Talking talking Talking, just nod and say “yeah” look around like there’s something more important and slowly through the night give her more or less attention depending on how many friends she’s with. (Less with more friends). That will get you atleast a number if she’s just as shy and weird as you

[@carcar4425]

they like barely helped this kid

[@francisdecosta3091]

Just do what Billy blue balls did, and wait till you are in your 20s to get laid. You have hands, right?

[@Xrayblazer3595]

Bill yur advice sucked. Hes got the opening lines he cant close the deal. I had the same prob.

[@peteranon8455]

Never ask a fish how to fish. Fish don't know how to fish.

[@RotGtIE]

Typical Nia. She can't figure out why it's so hard to give dating advice for men, then Bill points out that she's never been in the position of having to be a man trying to hook up with a chick (which is a completely reasonable explanation for the difficulty she is having), and she immediately sneers and gets bitchy. Just shuts it down with a "we're not going there." It boggles the mind as to how such an easily-offended person somehow lives with Bill Burr. One would think you'd need tougher skin to cohabitate with him.

[@TheCynicalDude_]

+RotGtIE Yeah. I don't understand his choice in woman at all, either.

[@willemkanon4020]

THEY ALREADY DISCUSSED IT! You guys really hear what you don't wanna hear racist piece of shit. You know how Bill doesn't drop anything either it'd be tiring to keep discussing the same shit over and over.

[@tricktracy2254]

Women are insecure, they hate themselves

[@stvia]

RotGtIE That's not what they were saying. Bill said "As a woman you don't have to..." but that's kind of wrong. Women still make efforts and fail. Even though it doesn't seem like it. That's the discussion I think Nia was referring to

[@KB-nz6bv]

@@TheCynicalDude_ “how dare he find a black woman with an opinion appealing 😱”

[@justthink4yourself417]

Plz keep nia off the podcast

[@MetalBacon64]

Please keep Nia OFF the podcast.

[@imyouyoureme1533]

fuck off

[@joeys7570]

Boot Nia off the Cast Thumbs up if agree 👍

[@kristoamadeus4441]

incel

[@skageschei131]

Please keep Nia on the podcast!!