Things That Drive Me Insane About The ISFJ

#isfj #intj #mbti
The defender, the nurturer, the protector, but even these angels aren't all good. Find out what drives me (ESTP) insane about the ISFJ's...
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[@wasabinee7838]

Isfj usually attracts toxic people which is really sad, since I feel they deserve better. I’m a INFP and seeing my ISFJ best friend getting over a toxic girl made my heart wrenched. He now lost his confidence he once was proud of 😔

[@MaxKoenig-Mk001]

That's a big issue most people don't realize. Thanks for mentioning 👍🏻

[@Mariela0183aa]

I am a isfj and that happened to me i was betrayed by a Friend who was a toxic friend but I am too nice and became friends with her and that's how I became a isfj I'm picky about friends now.

[@coffee6687]

oh, i'm not sure if i am actually an isfj since i never attract toxic people, it's just my friend who wants new friends who gets toxic ones and i warn her that they're shitty

[@coffee6687]

@@arly380 i actually had multiple tests and i'm an intp lol

[@anandaalvarez4336]

That’s why we INFP’s have to protect them cause we do value them, at least I do

[@gezv06v]

I'm ISFJ and I annoy me

[@ewuraamasaah4515]

Same 😒

[@Anotherguy1st]

@Justin Williams From what I can tell they like to keep the peace and harmonize so much that they seem to adapt thier personality to those around them. They will suffer rather then tell you something that they think will upset you. Really getting to know them however is pretty hard, I'm still trying to fully figure out my fiance after almost three years. She will hide things from me because she is scared I would leave but all I've ever wanted is to help her. You can't fix problems until you can identify them though, you have to do some detective work with them to fully understand. INTJ here.

[@MsJennasisReign]

Fuckin same lol

[@Rina-mp8qb]

😢😢😢

[@naturalinstinct4950]

@Justin Williams also an ENTJ. too much agree. the lock of rationality and pragmatism drive me insane

[@evag2660]

Lol....."isfj's like annoying obnoxious people...most of my friends are isfj's"

[@Leverquin]

i am isfj and i never met other isfj. :S

[@erikaigoo]

@@Leverquin same

[@nehyandewinslow5125]

@@Leverquin I have two friends who are isfjs and they are so kind

[@winterbird4447]

I thought the same...when she said that :)

[@chadash5548]

Bs, I'm isfj and I'm not social, I get so paranoid when I come across extroverts, they're so invasive and talk run. As a matter of fact, I avoid socialising unless they are introverts.

[@mysticfawn6812]

Im social but introverted and have anxiety

[@chadash5548]

@@mysticfawn6812 u sound bit lost there buddy.

[@mysticfawn6812]

@@chadash5548 Let me break it down for you then, I like socializing, but I'm an introvert so I like to recharge before socializing alot, and I have anxiety.

[@chadash5548]

@@mysticfawn6812 anxiety is a rather broad field u know that right. Assuming u mean u have social anxiety am I correct?

[@mysticfawn6812]

@@chadash5548 g.a.d and s.a.d

[@HalfTimesTwo]

The number one thing that bothers me about ISFJs is their lack of confrontation. Often it does more harm than good.

[@nefelovamon]

I was going to confront you, but i'm an isfj. All jokes aside, it does feel like a weakness... So no reason to confront you either!

[@amyb7823]

Yeah I know, I hate it too. I’m an ISFJ. I wish it was something I could change.

[@ReapeX]

Hmm, I guess I'm just different from life experiences. I'm an ISFJ and I prefer confrontation. I like when people confront me, but then they get upset when I confront them.

[@timpinkstone6093]

im an isfj and im non confrontational..but its only because i dont wanna knock sum1s teeth out over a silly matter. the guilt is horrendous afterwards. but if sum1 tries bullying me or sum1 close to me i will probably kill them. for instance when i see a bully in action and i can see that he intends to cause harm, just being evil, there will be no holdbacks and no mercy from me because i feel they deserve it

[@rasha.n5748]

I'm also an isfj and i confirm but i feel it's a weakness and a strength too because i see my friends when they get angry they say or do crazy things that they regret later but i can hold myself together in these situations i would calm myself down and try to think about the situation rationally and think whether it's the other person's fault or it's me misunderstanding or whatever and then when i confront them they can't manipulate me because i thought about everything thoroughly but that's mostly with close relationships because i care about the relationship and the other person and i don't want to ruin everything out of impulse but with other people okay i don't think i care that strongly to confront so i would just walk away and make sure they have no way back to me 😂 i guess i do hate confrontations alot 😂

[@es.9997]

bad things about them : (perspective of an INTP with parents who are both ISFJ) •passive aggressiveness •expect you to be exactly like them •allow people to treat them bad but make excuses and forgive them. every. single. time. •project their beliefs on me •everything I say is related to them, they get butthurt about everything. Instead of talking about it, they resort to their passive aggressiveness. •close mindedness •martyrdom and so much more...

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

I'm an ISJF but let me tell you I don't tolerate abuse if you mistreat me intentionally you will not get any kindness or respect from me

[@amyb7823]

Thank you. This comment I can relate to as an ISFJ. I am not going to sit back and put up with abuse or disrespect to me OR to anyone of my loved ones. Also, I’m not the most affectionate person in the world, but if you disrespect or hurt any of my loved ones, you will definitely hear from me in a very bold way. I will definitely stand up and defend my loved ones even though I’m not confrontational normally and even though I tend to be more quiet and usually don’t speak up.

[@kenseymcbay3982]

Yes me too! I’m not one to openly confront people when they something rude to me but if someone is visibly abusive to me or someone else that’s when I confront them

[@Rina-mp8qb]

Me too!! I'd rather leave toxic people so I can get more peace of mind.

[@Kate98755]

I leave people who don’t treat me well, I had someone who kept wanting me to do social functions but it was a difficult time for me, daughter needed my help, so this friend said she gave up on me, I never talked to her again, seriously you gave up on me? go to hell

[@niagregory2656]

Thank you very much . I am ISFJ; I relate to this comment.

[@chadash5548]

Express ourselves, sure, it's not like it's one of THE impossible things to do. It's like me asking an extrovert, "try to shut up for at least an hour."

[@valerynho]

Who else is ISFJ here? lol *hands up*

[@amazing6764]

✋

[@Melomotooo]

🖐

[@nehyandewinslow5125]

✋

[@kristenrichardson439]

🤚

[@benjaminrue8684]

🖐

[@torgersen44]

Any other ISFJ’s watching , while reading comments and chuckling to themself saying yep, that’s me😂

[@geensjc]

Meeeee

[@demoncyborg98]

Me too

[@mplullies5512]

Same

[@jessienejdi5159]

ISFJ attract very often narcissists as with their caring nature they are also empaths. They tend to take all the bad behaviour and not do anything about it but rather believe in goodness of the person and hope that one day they will change, which narcissists never do, infact given the benefit of dpubt they only get worse. This leads the ISFJ to the typical he/she cant leave a bad relationship but also being the typical in putting others first and then one day exploding as their needs were never met. Which in the case ur talking about cud be the reason why the guy murdered his wife. This of course does not mean that he ISFJ are murderers but I guess in extreme situations of abusive relationship cud have happend

[@Peonies925]

Jessie Nejdi Ive always used to be attracted to narcissist and them to me.🤮 I can spot them now, set boundaries and dont take their crap!

[@abesapien9930]

ISFJ's are not empaths, unfortunately. They simply care for people that are very close to them. Everyone else that is outside their Fe community they struggle to show empathy to. I've consistently seen ISFJ's treat grocery store clerks or waiters rather coldly, especially if their day is off. All the types have weaknesses, and this is one of the ISFJ's.

[@musicandpoetry_8]

Omg me! I was abused by a narcissist for months back in 2016 but I ended it because I just couldn’t take his BS anymore..wow this is so spot on

[@user-ld9hs1mb1u]

Wow hearing this was crazy because, as an ISFJ, I realize the partners I’ve chosen have been those with big / dominant personalities and I’ve totally made excuses for bad behavior. For me, this comes from a place of wanting to see the best in people but there is definitely a point at which I’ll snap and will no longer put up with them if their behavior doesn’t change.

[@mysticfawn6812]

My bf is great

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

Blake, You are fucking spot on dude! I am unfortunately associated with some of those people who I become very impatient with as they continue to be toxic and not change their ways

[@Mayasnotes___]

The problem isn't about dominant ones the way you grew up, your parental condition,truamatic things ,socio cultural political aspects, psychological perspectives etc!!! Makes your behaviour so at some point you may cannot tolerate the dominant us!!! ( ENTP -A chorelic sanguine Dominant (7w8) yet phlegmatic melancholic supportive!! ) If you grew up in very traditional comfort zones you may cannot handle yhe unpredictable Dominant ones!!! They may be toxic af for you!!! So you must need to evaluate your own actions, needs and wants and others things when you plan to have any kind of relationship with dominant ones!!! Dominant ones are visionary types who are thinking ones in a adaptive mindset so they are Dominants so willingness is matters!!! Thinkers needs feeling ones to Balanced their emotions dear!!! Hope your perspective can be challenged through my views!!!

[@Mayasnotes___]

And most importantly they also need the same mutual commitment and willingness in order to work a relationship healthy ways!!! Truma ppl have truamatic bond with each other while healthy ones have their Helathy traits!!! So choice is yours which one is better and comfortable for you!!!

[@Jornanfuentes]

what.. I'm ISFJ... and I think dominant personality in woman it's so sexy. But, I like been dominant as well as play of couples atleast.

[@MissCherielicious]

This is totally my grandma, who's of course an ISFJ. For many years she was married to an alcoholic. She's been through a lot with him, cried for days and was literally scared for her (and her daughter's) life. She never even thought about the divorce, she was with him till the very end (he died because of cancer). She never thinks about herself. She's the most happy when she can "serve" others, and make others feel good. It frustrates me so much, because I keep telling her to start doing things for herself, but she just doesn't see a point in doing so. She hates changes, but it seems like she can endure anything. She's simply too good for this world

[@MrBassface06]

That’s my mother to a T. My dad is an alcoholic but she’s extremely loyal to him and always hopes that he’ll go back to his old self. She’s the type of mother that is a mother to everyone. She stress eats due to my fathers drinking (hence repressive feelings). She absolutely selfless and her 4 kids including me cherish her for it. I know she stayed with my father to give a good example to us kids. My father isn’t physically abusive but he’s unpredictable when drunk and causes a scene whether it’s arguing in the middle of the night or blasting music at 3am 🤦‍♂️

[@NewNeko2000]

Interesting, I'm ISFJ and I can't imagine relationship with someone who is toxic or annoying. I'm ONLY attracted to nice people.

[@AznShadowNight]

I do agree that ISFJ are attracted to people with strong personality and decision making. It's the feeling that skip a beat in the heart like "I want to know more about you." As an ISFJ man, a woman who are goal driven and attracted looking would have me wanting to chase after her. Also give me more reason to be more social.

[@dknovedkurr00]

JavaBeans I’m an ISFJ and that is definitely true. For some reason i like bubbly and girls with a strong personality

[@nathans8491]

Yes! 100% especially with red hair haha

[@사라-t9g]

Same, except i’m a girl and that’s what attracts me in a man. Not necessarily to make me more social but everything else is spot on.

[@Nobody-yx8og]

I feel exposed!

[@Esperion12]

I'd have to disagree. As an ISFJ I rarely put up with sht from others. I just don't call them outright on it. There's a difference. Unless they actually attack me or my loved ones. Also... I fail to see how repressing ones emotions equals being a murderer...Not really thought through idea.

[@ashuranero5721]

You surpress too long you will one day snap

[@Lowdermoomoo]

Eh, I agree with the not taking shit part but also I feel like ISFJs tend to jump to conclusions/make accusations before having all the facts, and sometimes I feel like that contributes to ISFJs thinking that it’s “shit from others” before getting the full picture and it can be a misunderstanding. As an INTJ, I like when people are direct or ask me to clarify for example instead of saying “you didn’t do xyz!” Instead of “do you know why this isn’t done?” Or “you said this about me!” Instead of “could you clarify what you mean by this? What I got from that didn’t seem nice” and chances are something was misunderstood or lost in translation. Idk, that’s my perspective though. I could be wrong.

[@erika89765]

My mom is an ISFJ... and she defies the system. Seriously, she’s not your average ISFJ. She confronts people often about things that everyone else purposely leaves unsaid, being completely unafraid to voice her disagreement or disapproval with basically anyone. She’s not that social, saying that she’d rather be alone than have to talk to other people- all of the time. She can’t repress her feelings as well as she tries to, so she often ends up ranting to whoever’s in earshot. My mom’s open, trusting, and sincere to a fault. (She is DEFINITELY reluctant to change and has no faith that changes will improve things sometimes... being that the ENFP I am provides enough optimism to balance her out, our relationship can be complicated sometimes, haha!!) Nice video! It’s cool to see your perspective on the different types. I love it!!!

[@erika89765]

C RD Oh, very very true. Her childhood sucked. I don’t blame her.

[@croissant1949]

Heyyy I'm also an enfp with an isfj mom! She is very righteous definitely, and will stand up to a system that is harmful to people

[@ingver5035]

Uhh that’s interesting you just described my best friend who i am sure is an isfj, she can drive me nuts with her Inflexibility in some ways but she is so open at the same time i love it! ~ enfp

[@abesapien9930]

Sounds more like an ISTJ, or a depressed and angry ISFJ.

[@erika89765]

@@abesapien9930 This is actually quite hysterical now that I’ve found this thread again. I’ve retyped my mom as a jumper INTJ, or basically a more introverted INFJ. I laugh at times I thought she was an S user now.

[@niagregory2656]

I am an ISFJ and I just shut certain ppl out my life who feel they are gonna control me lol.

[@floralfancy7814]

Good for you standing up for yourself.

[@sandracross483]

ISFJ here. It's the ISFJ 'door slam'.. We process info thoroughly and then act.👍

[@karinaadame7360]

I am an ISFJ and i am not social. I don't have any friends

[@sirbradfordofhousejones]

Easier for there to be harmony in your world if there's nobody there! I envy you. I am married with two kids and I'm constantly stressed AF. -fellow ISFJ

[@jenniferbrogdon570]

ISFJ perspective here: I tolerate annoying and mean people, including my spouse, because sometimes a girl like me has gotta take whatever she can get. If I left the situation would go from bad to worse, and wouldn't be able to find another partner and would face financial ruin. I'd go from Suzy Homemaker to Suzy Homeless Baker. I don't however tolerate excuses for people's nastiness. I always find a way to say what I think. There have been many a time when I've served someone a batch of freshly baked cookies and hot cocoa, then proceeded to tell them what a supreme dillhole they are, in the most gentle way, of course.

[@ashuranero5721]

To the first paragraph: That is pretty dam pathetic. Staying with someone just because of financial issues. You are practically using them as ATM machines. Grow independant and jsut leave To the Second paragraph: "Make cookies and cacoa and tell what dillholes they are in a gently way" 😂😂😂

[@maylynbayani]

To look at it in another angle, ISFJs usually gives in to others and have difficulty saying no so these people gravitate towards partners with bigger personalities because most of the time, those types are not afraid of offending others. So ISFJs are basically using their partners as a shield while maintaning the "nice guy" persona. I told my ISFJ husband that Id remain by his side but he needs to start confronting others on his own. I told him that he will never get the confidence to stand his own in an arguement if I keep on doing it for him. He agreed and I see the improvement. He became more sure of himself and his abilities. We have different personalities but we cant use it as an excuse not to overcome our weaknesses. Im an ESTJ and I know I come across arogant but that is not a licence to be rude and not to exert effort in trying to empathize. Also, let's not include Chris Watts in this and to subtly blame his wife for being "too dominant". That man brutally killed his pregnant wife and 2 daughters. A normal person would have divorced her not annihilate the entire family. He didnt even spare his young daughters a painless death instead beat them to death before discarding them in an oil tank.

[@TaxingIsThieving]

That explains a lot. My boss' partner is ISFJ and for some reason I don't like her. He does everything so far as I can see (ESTP).

[@maizamiuchida]

I'm INFP and I have a ISFJ as my best friend. She's too innocent to be friend with me because usually I'm the most annoying person in the world and her other friends be like "where the heck did you find this human?" But I'm only like that if she's around and if she's not here, I'll just mind my own business. She's very innocent but choose to be friend with me, one the most horrible person in the world. But what I know is that I love her and appreciate her company as my best friend.

[@fancygg563]

a bit late , but why are you saying those stuff about yourself ? I'm glad you're having a great friendship with her , but for the sake of everything that is holy , the most horrible thing you can do is believing that you are horrible . So , try to not do that , because you are , and you can be much more than that! ( now that i think about it , my opinions are corny af!).

[@princessl.d.g.]

I am an ISFJ and repress my feelings because I try to avoid conflict. However, when my feelings reach a peak, it's not pretty. I need to work on that. 😊 People would say, "She never snaps like that."

[@maylynbayani]

My pastor's advise to my ISFJ husband when he asked permission to date me was : " Make sure you lead or else she will lead you." All ISFJs here were saying how domineering their spouses were, but let me ask you if you have made steps to lead in the relationship? What was your part which made your partners in the past take in the reigns in the relationship? Someone has to and if you dont then your partner will. Have you ever considered that your partner is overcompensating for your inability to do so? I think ISFJs are nice, that why I married one. However, standing for yourself will ALWAYS risk offending someone. Now yoh have to ask yourself. Why are ISFJs so likeable? Well it's because they dont like to offend people ans that in itself has consequences. If you dont risk offending someone, then you risk your own self expression.

[@darlinnails]

Very insightful!

[@JeisonCarbar]

You are right, ISFJ were born to be leaders, we are natural leaders, due to our nature to put things in order and resolve conflicts through love. ISFJs are known as defenders, and that is what ISFJs stand for. Love! and by love I mean, Order, justice, freedom and everything that comes from it. That's why traditions and family are so important to us. But out of balance, or in our shadow, we deal with this internal struggle, fearful of offending or overstepping the boundaries of others or curtailing their freedom. Hence, we do not lead or take any more aggressive stance. In the shadows we think that to lead is to impose, to cut, chain and oppress. And that is tyranny not leadership. And evil does that, it leads people away from their truths, keeping natural leaders away from this ability it leads many more people away from the healthy path. But this is wrong. Leading is not that. Leading requires a lot of conversation, a lot of delegation of tasks, a lot of patience and the ability to listen and empathize with the pain of the other; In fact, leading is also protecting, caring and taking away from discomfort and this is a great sign of love. Leading for the good and towards the good is a huge act of love. Christ came into the world to lead people back to the path of light towards God. And he died for everyone to lead humanity towards the greatest source of love there is. God. "I am the way, the truth and the life, no one comes to God except through me." John 14:6 And leading a partnership, relationship, family or whatever needs leadership towards the best that those people can achieve. It is responsibility and responsibility is also a sign of love. And that is leading. And that's love. And when ISFJs are comfortable leading they become healthier.

[@maylynbayani]

@@JeisonCarbar definitely agree with you. Im an ESTJ and ud be honest that I am less of a tyrant because my husband always talk to me on how I come off to people. Now he is usually offered leadership roles because of his ability to stay calm in the most aggrivating situations but has always been hesitant. He's fairing better and I think the positive feedback fron patients and superiors encourages him

[@JeisonCarbar]

@@maylynbayani Good to hear you guys are doing well. And yes the ISFJ are hesitant to take the lead because we think we're going to offend people. But people are just waiting for someone to lead them. Otherwise, it would be harmful to everyone. Most people don't like chaos and confusion so they follow someone. And it's good when that someone is a good and responsible Man. We ISFJs love helping others, but we don't associate leading with helping, but leading is helping too, sometimes many people at the same time. A teacher does just that with the classroom. Christ the greatest leader of all did this when he gave the sermon on the mount, led, taught and even fed with loaves and fish multiplied by faith. The ISFJ are usually very calm and stable. They are the ones leading people through a fire or an earthquake and they seem to be unaffected by the situation. I'm amazed at how calm I can be when I'm faced with tragedy and pain. And I kept it that way for myself, my family and friends. And it's good that you have each other, supporting each other and teaching and learning together. "A wise woman, builds her house" ..proverbs 14:1

[@georgiak.551]

I just don’t have the heart to tell my friends that they’re toxic/annoying so i get stuck with them for years

[@gwendolyngonzales4632]

Very interesting! I tested as an ISFJ and it seems pretty dead on! I have always been attracted to extroverted fun people. A part of me wished I could be that way, but I only love being the center of attention for about 30 seconds then I need to step out of the light! I definitely dress and present myself in a way that attracts attention, but then I don't want that attention if it gets to be very much. I agree about confrontation too. I get huge anxiety when I feel like I'm about to engage in confrontation. If it sneaks up on me and I feel the need to defend something that I believe in it doesn't usually seem as bad. But anticipating confrontation? NO THANK YOU! It's kind of sad to think you want to be a certain way but then don't seem to have the balls to make it happen...

[@JeisonCarbar]

ISFJ man here! Yes, We ISFJs know this is annoying, we value people who don't value us. This is because we have this tendency to try to fix things and put things in order. That's why we are attracted or we attract, what we think is broken or falling apart. We ISFJs and INFJs attract these kinds of situations, people, conflicts, narcissists and psychopaths. Even knowing that it is not our obligation to help those who have not asked for help, but we act according to our nature. Putting things in order, in balance and ending conflicts, even if these conflicts are internalized in others. Out of balance we accept being abused, in the hope that the other will realize that they are wrong. Like a mirror, reflecting the true face of the monster. But when they notice and get in line, they usually walk away. Like a bird with broken wings, with healed wings they fly away. That's when we realize that we were just a sanctuary, a rehabilitation center or an emotional dump. These people just come into our lives, purify themselves, discharge their traumas and bad behaviors and then leave, to make new traumas and new addictions. It's funny to notice these patterns. It's like setting up a car wash on the edge of a dirt road. And we carry our luggage in carts made of vanity, so we resist abuse and mistreatment, in order to receive some recognition in the end. But that rarely comes, hence we either stay longer or we break up for good and we put these people on the sacred blacklist of grudges and we never forget who they are or what they do. Because helping someone and waiting for a reward is not love, it's just business. If I want to help, I help! Want a hug, take it! If you want some advice, take it! If you want an ear to vent, get mine! You want forgiveness, you're forgiven! go and sin no more. And don't expect reciprocity. because reciprocity, given from the heart not out of obligation, has much more value. And this is perhaps the biggest lesson for the ISFJ. Learn to help! Not everyone in trouble wants to be helped, sometimes and often they just want to hit the bottom of the pit. Their lesson is down there, in the dark, in the mud and in the loneliness. Everyone has their lesson to learn. And that's freedom. And freedom is love. Let people learn the way they want to learn. Because allowing them to learn for themselves is also HELPING. And maybe even the best and most efficient way to help is to let them break themselves. It is by falling that we learn to walk and scars also teach and strengthen. Not forcing lessons down their throats. But when we get into balance it disappears because you learn to say no. We learn to separate who deserves and who doesn't. And when that happens it's so freeing, and happiness finally comes and stays, accompanied or not. And we ISFJs know that, we just don't share it with others. We always face this internal struggle. To help or not to help? This is the question.

[@tellaphon6718]

One thing, the reason why we are stuck in our ways is because we found the best way to do something and then other people come in and think they know better and start changing things around for us to have dealt with. Deal with. Often. So we are usually only tightly guarded about those kinds of things that help us to be most efficient. Lol

[@babblegoose]

My husband is ISFJ Lu, whatcha tryin to say?! lol

[@BasedGodEmperorTrump]

ISFJ male, here. We tend to have mommy issues, whether from neglect or narcissistic traits/NPD etc. We look for extraverted/ masculine/ dominant women. We're passive in nature and take on a support role in relationships. Before we know it, we're in a trauma bond from a female malignant narcissist. When it's all said and done, we're broken, completely emasculated, even more pathetic and have a new found addiction to emotional masochism. The pain feels nice.

[@elisaw8367]

Hey Lu, the only ISFJ I know is my brother, and I can tell you that what you described fits him 100%, sadly. He is just too kind and loyal, so that he really doesn't cut people off when it's necessary. I observed this so many times, with friends, family members... and also with his ex-girlfriend, and it broke my heart. She treated him badly, she manipulated him, she was the protagonist and he did literally everything according to her needs and wishes. I would tell him: Stand up for yourself over and over again... unfortunately until now he hasn't been able to change his behavior. I think it's imprinted kind of deeply in their personality so in order to change this side of them they would have to work REALLY hard on themselves, so they actually would have to WANT to change this so deeply. Same with every other personality type. I think there are things that we can change to a degree, for sure, but some of them take a life-long effort, as it's just such an essential part of us. (and let's not forget that every con has the pro, so ISFJ 's maybe wouldn't be this lovely, loyal and kind if there wasn't this down-side. Every superpower has it's negative side. There's never only good. Always pros and cons.)

[@ginaishere9457]

I'm an ISFJ and I have a crush on an INFP guy in our class. We didn't talk. But I feel like wanting to cheer him up, he always looks down.

[@socialoutcast1327]

Me: Isfj’s don’t seem that bad 3:36 💀 🤦‍♂️

[@itallaboutme773]

SocialOutcast13 I know right ppl make look like poor them, but when I have enough of ppl yin and yang They turn me into angry person now

[@ronlake7699]

I have a love/hate relationship with ISFJs! I'm an ENFJ and I like to use Ni to come up with new ideas but ISFJs are so concrete but they can't totally say no because they don't want to offend me.. They also are such 'gatekeepers' put in charge by more dominant types to maintain their traditions, their status quo & prevent anything fun and interesting from happening They can drive me crazy just how much they want to accommodate everyone

[@TaxingIsThieving]

My boss' partner is an ISFJ, I am very suspicious of her and I don't know why.

[@ronaldthump793]

I'm an INTP male and dated an ISFJ female. The short? It doesn't work, regardless of an explosive start; she could listen to the INTP audio book, whilst I learnt structure, being nurtured and a sense of duty. It faded gradually and I found it very past orrientated (sensory) when her SJ circle routine, which I admired, became boring without endless exploration and ideas that I'm intrinsically accustomed to. For her, I think that she needed an overtly dominant man that paves her the way in a more superficial, collective manner. She was o livious to my meek inner confidence; probably due to her submissiveness when it comes to not questioning the 'hollywood' social norm of what a strong man really is: monkey se, monkey do. I only pull out my sword when it's needed... And there lies the problem, it was always sheathed with her. When I did show my leadership with her she was impressed but expected me to be like that 24/7 which is not ideal for an INTP. The result? Being treated like a child, which is a big no no for an autonomous type. Passive Aggression was also a massive issue as her suppressed feelings that were held in tightly due to her strict adherence to societal traditions 'dos and don'ts' couldn't be expressed, even to an INTP who can take criticism if it is logical and a valid issue. Intimately, there were problems I've never encountered. Example - introvert expecting the introvert to lead. It seemed counter intuitively baffling to me. I've always been confident, until I was given a step by step guide on how to choke her out of nowhere, which I thought choking wasnt strange but seemed fake from her. If her Fi wasn't as tight as her daily routine, I would've accommodated her request naturally. It was so unnatural as I felt almost like she wanted me to cause death. It seemed like she thought I perceived her as boring, therefore proving she's more than a cook and cleaner who runs birthdays, Christmas and Easter. Lastly, regardless of always being thankful and genuinely vocal about her cooking, she went ballistic once when I started eating and enjoyed it so much that I couldn't come up for air. She screamed at me in the most evil voice because I didn't say thank you before starting to eat. Out of a handful of relationships I've had, I strongly do not recommend this for ISFJ/INTP. If you're an ISFJ, feel free to retort as I'm interested in what makes you tick. If you read this far you're a trooper 😊

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

I am an ISFJ and I would never do any of this shit

[@minna6049]

Wow, sorry you had to go through that. Often times I'll come across it being said that ISFJ is co-dependent in my case that is not true I am more independent so possibly she was more co-dependent and expected you to be that dominant role. I'm an ISFJ and my Fiance is INTP and we've been together for 3 years, as every couple we have minor struggles within each other that we try to work on for one another. We make decisions together not expecting one to dominate over the other bcause like you said we are both introverted and quite so not a real trait we posses, we've always expressed how the one thing that we complement in one another is that my fiance will bring a calm to my more sensitive or spontaneous decision making with his logic and analyzing and I will bring some sensitivity to his more (not that he is this term in any means, more for example) but to his inhumane nature towards others and their feelings. Hope this helped a tad. :)

[@TaxingIsThieving]

ISFJs use second slot Fe, not Fi.

[@malenesainz2136]

Isfj’s are master emotional manipulators. They are so annoying. Intj with isfj husband

[@musicandpoetry_8]

@@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734maybe because astrology comes in to play too or your enneagram rating

[@chadash5548]

That's true with religious ISFJs, they are reluctant to change.

[@ukaicanhititwiththebutterf2802]

Agree with the partner part. My mom is an isfj and my dad is.. a terrible person, but she still loves him 😂

[@captenmurica8843]

As an ISFJ, I hate how people apologize. Like don’t just say “I’m sorry” to excuse your unacceptable behavior. In fact, I’d rather you just say nothing to me at all if you were gonna be that rude.

[@smartneb]

My husband (esfp) says I (isfj) attract weirdos everywhere I go. The truth is, I really like to be a safe place for people to go if they need a someone to talk to 💗

[@Ottolineification]

It’s not our taste in people... it’s just that these nasty people stick to us and we don’t push them away

[@AlisonRuthless]

Accurate.

[@sandracross483]

Isfj..we are data collectors and processors to the core. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but don't forget it all ends with a 'j' for judging. I think we do eventually add up all the info, and form a judgement of the person. The next step is solving..what am I going to do now? BUT I suspect we all figure that out too, and again finally DECIDE and act. We don't hurry, but we get there.. cautiously. This also applies to seeming stuck in our ways. Remember the thinking part has been done very thoroughly, and THEN we decide. Give me some new data.

[@heatherbryant4197]

Anyone else have issues with ISFJs gossiping? Especially gossiping behind your back after playing the kind, understanding shoulder-to-cry-on role?

[@user-jb2dd2hd8i]

I've seen that with an ENTP; so perhaps there's a parallel there as their dual.

[@mysticfawn6812]

Everyone gossips

[@heatherbryant4197]

@@mysticfawn6812 I suppose that's true to an extent. Yet some types of people seem far more predisposed to gossiping than others. For SFJs it seems like a way of life. I believe it's most likely because of their combination of Fe + Si. They understand the world based on past experience. Their tendency to tell stories about specifics of past events naturally makes them more likely to discuss individuals and their specific actions. Their sense of duty and loyalty to traditions and upholding group values also makes them feel like they need to "protect" the tribe from people who go against Fe values. And because of their Fe, they often seem to come to an understanding by pinging off others in conversation, and sometimes their Fe + inferior Ne makes them feel like sharing a piece of juicy gossip will make them seem momentarily interesting (an incentive for a type that is normally seen as "boring" and predictable), plus score them Fe brownie points with the group. I think it's important to note that in their eyes, they are not gossiping, but providing a service to their social circle, warning them, getting advice, or protecting themselves and their family from chaos and threats to their way of life. Many people will find their Fe phony and disingenuous, even backstabbing, but in their eyes they are just doing what they need to do. Compare this to other types... Let's say, an INTP, or any intuitive, who would rather discuss ideas than people, and with their Te ignoring, they are less likely to even cite the names of the people from whence the ideas sprung, and don't really care what others think enough to denigrate others out of concern for their own reputation. Even an INFJ, despite having Fe in the same slot as ISFJ, will be more likely to generalize principles into singular truths and describe overall patterns with their Ni, instead of getting into the nitty gritty of who said what when, "he said she said" details.

[@xero6396]

@@heatherbryant4197 INTPs don't have Te.

[@heatherbryant4197]

@@xero6396 "ignoring Te" = 6th slot Te, i.e. dominant Ti. I don't actually encounter many people in this community who believe we are only limited to use of 4 functions; most theories account for "unconscious" or "shadow" functions (slots 5-8) beyond their ego stack. Would you say you believe that each type is limited to use of 4 functions?

[@الملك-ل1ي]

I'm an ENTJ and my wife is an ISFJ. You can imagine how would it be! I have to structure the shit out of this relationship so it can fonctions. There is NO WAY out and I must fight for this marriage or it will Collapse.

[@mcjoetaco]

An ISFJ needs a confident ISTP in their life. This will challenge them and help towards their self growth.

[@mysticfawn6812]

Im.with an intp

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

@@parny958 Not against their will. Don't force someone to be something they're not or you're a terrible person

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

@@parny958 2 things 1.When there's many instances of women controlling their boyfriends how I'm supposed to be sure what your intent was? 2.It's a lot more difficult to identify jokes and other gestures when you don't hear how the words are being expressed

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

@@parny958 Okay 1.Ive never even had a relationship unfortunately 2.If a girl I dated treated me like dogshit regularly, I'd kick her to the effing curb. I will not take undeserved abuse from anyone. 3.Why learn emojis when I kinda hate them? 4.The reason I bring rotten girlfriends up is because I've heard so many stories and have witnessed guys that are constantly used and belittled by their girlfriends yet they do nothing about it

[@elijahechicagobearsboyd5734]

@@parny958 Did you not read the beginning of my last comment? I've never been in a relationship unfortunately

[@jhurt3824]

I’m an isfj and I am smiling as I watch a girl in a bathrobe expressing a variety of emotions about how we irritate her. Ps.....your posting on social media in a bathrobe.

[@evag2660]

*you're

[@preuischeprinzessin9964]

PS: ISFJs are known for being very close-minded. They lack imagination and creativity. Sad :(

[@empresspalpatine8792]

@@preuischeprinzessin9964 Not true.

[@ashuranero5721]

@@empresspalpatine8792 It would make sense though since they are Si Doms.

[@ashtreylil1]

Isfj gf.....I'm an intp, the most annoying type in the world to be in an emotional and social team activity with. I'm trying to learn how to not be an asshole I promise.

[@MarieClairAmorim]

I'm an ISFJ and I agree with everything you said, I have to say thank you! I think we really see the people with some kind of filter, because we will always look for something on their days, their week, to forgive their bad behavior, and I feel really bad about it because this made me struggle with a relationship for 5 years when everyone was saying for me to get rid of it... I'm really methodic with things reaching at the point to be a tiring perfectionist... And I really don't tell people about my feelings to don't let them concerned about me... I'll always protect others, like, I don't let everyone scream or mistreat my twin sister, I'll yell with any person who does it, I even join discussions on social media when someone disagrees with her, but I can't stand for myself :( I don't know about others isfjs because I dont know others with this personality type, she's an infp, but I always think I'm really anoying...

[@geensjc]

ISFJ with a history of dating the bad boys and them being frustrated because I always suppressed my feelings. Until I’m drunk and morph into an extrovert 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@linaloureiro96]

I'm an INFP and my boyfriend is an ISFJ, and I'm trying to learn more about both our personalities so we can be better together, and this video just made me feel really attacked.. 😣

[@Coneman3]

They want to help while also thinking they are superior and underestimating people.

[@minnie2me749]

My sister is an ISFJ, and oh my lord she is really just hating her cliques but once she left them nothing great came out of her mouth. They don't know how to say no, don't know how to think sometimes it's frustrating, and they be so kind to people that don't deserve them.smh

[@candyline5266]

As an ISFJ, I put with other's people bad behaviour when I was young. Now I realized how much it's important to to defend not only others but your personal boundaries as well. It's still hard for me to confront people bit I do it anyway If i feel like my boundaries were crossed by someone

[@kevinharris2410]

ISFJ gets with INTP, INTP recognizes "SOCIOPATH" in previous partners with the ISFJ. INTP loves the new assignment: thus loves the ISFJ. INTP is a mastermind.... I think it accidentally made my relationship. Didn't mean for it to do but I have no other explanation for it than I like puzzles. - Lawsuits start getting typed up - Evidences start being collected ... Yeah; she's got a point--you ISFJ's really meat some $hi+ people : she loves me--I love what she brings to my table.... Is it fair? I don't know...

[@mysticfawn6812]

My bf is an intp

[@minna6049]

My fiance is INTP and I'm ISFJ, we make it work ☺️ love him with all my being ❤️. Explained to him how sometimes the things we find difficult or different about who we are is what someone else has been looking for all along. This was true of what I was looking for in him.

[@MrBassface06]

Mary I’m starting to recognize the INTP/ISFJ pairing after I met a ISFJ I’m dating. We immediately clicked but she’s reserving her feelings because she broke up a long term relationship a month ago but I know she knows we hit it off. I absolutely adore her as INTP, I can’t take it, and I don’t know exactly what it is about her that drives my circuits haywire

[@shahdq3359]

DAMN IT SHES TALKIN ABT ME LMAO 😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@ashleelmb]

I'm an ENTP and I find ISFJ's to be too emotionally driven and their priorities are pretty fickle. They also have explosive tempers over stuff that they need to get a grip over. You can't disagree or be completely honest with an ISFJ or they will fall out with you over it. To get on with ISFJ's, generally, you have to pretend that their perspectives on stuff are right or okay and although you can hint or say mildly if you disagree with them, they end up taking it personally, snap and fall out with you. My step brother, an old band colleague and a girl I was meeting up with for a short while were all ISFJ's and as a brutally honest person, I've often found myself having to tread very carefully about what I say to them all if I wanted to stay on the right side of them.

[@tamaraserrano7415]

I find this hilarious and accurate. My sister is an ENTP and I’m an ISFJ, we never see eye to eye

[@ashleelmb]

@@tamaraserrano7415 Doesnt surprise me. Every spectrum in your character will be the opposite to your sister.

[@TaxingIsThieving]

They can't be as bad as ESFJs, surely

[@ashleelmb]

@@TaxingIsThieving Yeah, ESFJ's are almost as bad. ESFJ's are 2 faced and will agree with you just to fit in with you or your group, despite having other ideas. ESFJ's lack the rationality for good decision making and are mostly quite simple minded too and lack the intelligence and logic to cope with complex situations.

[@andressuarez3079]

Yes, we are duty bounded and that makes us seek that same patern in other people, but they are usually not so much warm hearted, maybe INTJ's/ISTJ's/ that usually are dominant and we have a chance to get stuck in toxic relations. Not saying they are always like this but there's a chance that we end up not knowing how to get out of a toxic environement. And yes, we might not know very well how to express our feelings when we are young and this might end up creating a time bomb. Some of us end up in therapy and getting better but there's also a chance that ISFJ's will end up swallowing shit like there is no tomorrow and outbursting with whatever consecuences you may imagine. So talk to your ISFJ about school, about work, help her/him talk the shit out of their heads. Good insight. Regards.

[@stevencampbell1970]

As an isfj myself I think the reason we choose the people we choose is because we want someone to support someone to serve.

[@stevencampbell1970]

Sorry ive recently found that I'm an istj sorry.

[@stevencampbell1970]

@@GtjsnWhat if im a guy like how would that even work like I have to be the breadwinner I don't wanna be its just the job they gave me.

[@ashuranero5721]

@@stevencampbell1970 I am pretty sure their are woman who like to be the breadwinner, but they probably going to be in the minority

[@Phoenix_cataclysm_in_2040]

Captain America is an ISFJ. Hate that.

[@violetdodio9544]

You kinda remind me of Cameron Diaz idk why.

[@whyeeolivia]

bruh my ISFJ coworker has been ignoring her ex’s red flags and be in denial for a whole year. They just hate to accept the truth about something, they’d rather live in a fucking lie and this is their biggest flaw,

[@pouyababaie1152]

And actually it is good to know you like ISFJs. Could u say what types you like beside ISFJs?

[@ohana_baby_2211]

I started dating introverted people when I saw the extroverted people would threat me bad.

[@mysterieusemoi5479]

As a INTP you ESTP are annoying 🤷🏾‍♂️ 😘

[@josephsvennson5694]

We find weird people entertaining. It makes us laugh that God allowed such things. It also helps us remember that God works in mysterious ways. The boys are scared of us, but men get us.

[@marouat0620]

There Is some boys maybe 4 yrs ago made fun of me I was about 14 yrs old. SO I was like smiling and telling them to stop making fun of me. They told I'm ugly I'm short I have a huge head. My tooth aren't perfect My smile make me ugly.. So I was too calm but when I back to home I just lock the doors bedrooms and start crying . Untill one day I said to them I'm gonna say all of that to my parents.. I was so depressed and I become so shy introvert don't talk too much. When I talk in public my heart start beating too fast and maybe if It is a presentation I will forget all informations because of my social fears . I really hate myself. When I see myself in the mirror I say how ugly I'm looking. Nobody gonna loves me i will stay alone for ever.... too many thoughts.. They ruined my life and now one of these boys is studying with me in the same class and we still don't talk to each other.. I was so happy and active . Nothing can make me afraid i was brave and whatever I want to say I just say .. Now I'm feeling alone and too many times I felt like I'm a failure I can't do anything as I prepared.. One day I start crying in class without stop because of my thoughts and that boy was there but no he is leaving in heaven without blaming himself and me who I was too kind to him I'm leaving such a boring life. No one can understand me even my family... If I get the test before I get bullied I'm sure I won't get the same type. I don't even know how to talk. At sports I don't play as I should. I say what if I fail they will gonna laugh they will hate me because I'm not perfect.... I'm really needing help

[@ashuranero5721]

I am very sorry that happened to you. My condolescence

[@D2SProductions]

Whenever someone uses the word, "but," in a sentence, whatever came before the word, "but," is a lie. For example, when someone is breaking up with someone else, "I love you, but..." Or in your example in this video, "I absolutely love ISFJs, but..."

[@unregistered_user]

Lol, “they always pick the most annoying people, Oh here is an example opposing what I just said”

[@laurasusannalisaharleysantera]

Sending you love back !

[@whyeeolivia]

lmaooo the whole Hong Kong is filled with ISFJ 💀

[@obesemousemanhd]

As an intp, I declare war on isfjs

[@MrBassface06]

I’m an INTP and in love with one though 😭😭 they’re actions get to me but idk why I’m still attracted

[@obesemousemanhd]

dannyh415 I know it’s a joke. I get you though, my sister is an isfj.

[@tamaraserrano7415]

As an ISFJ, conflict isn’t the way to go. So *runs away*

[@kjdaniels3267]

Reluctant to Change sure but I do realize that change is a part of life and you can't always run away from it. Also change for me (i.e. moving) became part of my life so I got used to it.

[@ingridbraastad6316]

I’m sorry, it’s my fault

[@AndeAndrea]

I don’t know any isfj’s but they are supposedly the most common female type. I’m suppose to have an isfj superego(evil/triggered by deep betrayal); which leads me to believe isfj’s can be vindictive af. 😂🤗

[@mysticfawn6812]

Its true. But i don't focus on bad. People

[@amyb7823]

I’m not vindictive at all and am very forgiving, as well. Maybe it’s my life experience that makes me this way, but I’m an ISFJ and I’m not vindictive whatsoever. More so the opposite of that. In one breath, people say ISFJs are extremely tolerant of others bad behavior and in the next, they say we are vindictive. Which is it? Do we put up with a lot of crap or are we vindictive and hurtful when someone does us wrong? I don’t see how it could really be both.

[@annikajoo8856]

You don’t necessarily need to be horrible for an isfj to just walk out sometimes all it needs is time, my ex never talked about anything he didn’t like or had problems with, I thought everything was fine and after eight years (we were already married) he just left suddenly. I am an Infj, so also pretty emphatic, I wasn’t horrible to him. I also prefer harmony (which might have been part of the problem) but I would have never done what he did. Sometimes the ISFJs are also at fault and not only victims because they are such good people. I hate that they would rather hurt you deeply than talk about problems.

[@Talkingwithfamouspeople]

Hey hey hey! Partner of an ISFJ here, you know?

[@mikewilliams7104]

Ok...not true about all. ISFJ fit me to a tee. I have other ISFJ friends and we are a little different, but overall the same. Small backstory about me. As a younger man, dating sucked. All my GFs cheated on me, but loved everything about me. Workplaces I had issues with working with lazy people. Back to the point, people like you dont understand us. To us, we dont care if people like you dont understand us, we focus on the people that we can get along with. We put up with outloud people, like yourself, to keep the peace. By no means am I saying we are perfect. It's acutely the opposite, we know we are not and look at people like you and think , why do you think you're so perfect and have the answer for everything? I'm in my late 40's now. I've made a fair amount of bad choices, but have learned from the majority. I've been with the same woman for almost 30 years with 3 great children. She's a ISFJ also, so it works great. We don't really care about others opinions, because just the year of being together is enough to end any type of argument or disagreement. We lead by example, people that have issue with us 100% of the time have internal issues with themselves and need to look in the mirror and fix that person before judging others. Just wanted to leave a comment standing up for the ISFJ's that have their acts together . Peace 😎✌🏿

[@mikewilliams7104]

@@Gtjsn , what I say again(but in a different way) not all of us are the same. Personally, I take great pride modeling for my children and the public how to be a good human being. I'm none of what your assuming all of us are because of a sign. What does that say about you? If you encounter a person of that horrible of character, that is the individual not the sign. Simple.... Turn it around, how would you feel if someone says the same about you and says it because of your sign and they're absolutely wrong? All of us should be judged by our individual character ONLY. I do with everyone I meet. If you can't do that, then look in the mirror. There will be the person to blame and tell to fix the problem. Hope you find happiness, it is a choice you make(to be happy) Again, peace 😎✌🏿

[@sammyj1183]

I feel like my best friend (who is an ENFJ) would describe me exactly the way you’ve described ISFJs in this video 😂. My stepsister would say the same things. Yeaahhh... I definitely make excuses for my obnoxious husband. And, for some reason, I’ve always dated the people that other people don’t want to put up with 😂. I could go into all the reasons for why this is probably the case, but ain’t nobody got time for all that. Great observations!

[@sammyj1183]

Love Lu Alright, alright!!! Hmmmm... this is from my point of view... I can’t speak for all ISFJs... And, who freakin’ knows if I really am an ISFJ? Supposedly the majority of people mistype themselves... 🤷🏼‍♀️ I think the initial attraction is because loud mouths force me out of my comfort zone. I may seem guarded or standoffish, but deep down I love when people ruffle my feathers a bit. I don’t like people (men) who I perceive are telling me what they think I want to hear. I trust the guys who will give me a reality check and tell me the things I *need* to hear - straight to my face - no matter how much it might hurt. They are usually (not always) the ones who will go to the ends of the earth for you once you’ve created that bond. My husband may be an a-hole when we go out with friends by poking fun at people (including me), but he has also been the one to save people when they are at their most vulnerable - whether he liked them or not. These types of people know when to put the feelings aside and do what *should* be done to make everyone around them happy. Also, I’m fairly certain my husband is an ESTP/Enneagram 8. Lol! We’ve definitely had our moments, but... All relationships come with some sort of challenge/obstacle from time to time. Loud mouths like to be the center of attention. I do not. And, I think annoying/arrogant people always have this inner person that is dying to be taken care of 😉😉. They’re tough on the outside but have this inner needy child on the inside that just wants to be loved for who they are 😂. At least that’s how I see it... There is probably a part of me that has a need to feel *needed* in relationships... it just seems to work out... 😋

[@sammyj1183]

nathan glass 😂😂

[@majorbob7211]

@@sammyj1183 Seems like you like the alpha male type of guy, most women do and by the way the ESTP is one of the most alpha male type...i have this ESTP friend who had more woman that i'll ever have in my live. Your explanation was very interesting

[@sammyj1183]

MajorBob Yeah. I was also pretty young when I met my husband. I think alpha males are probably the only guys who would be willing to put up with me over the long haul. I am really moody and alpha males don’t take it too personally on days when I am feeling b*tchy. They aren’t afraid to call me out on things or turn something into a joke. I can appreciate that. Haha. I think I need that, actually. 😏

[@bfgjrofficial5030]

ISFJ’s have the virtue of faith and Si hero so they can take a tonne of punishment and very very loyal. This can turn against them when they aren’t dating a nice ESFP or ENTJ.

[@bfgjrofficial5030]

Love Lu Well I’m not entirely sure about ENTJ working out but they both have positive Se and Te and negative Fi and Ni functions which pair perfectly with the positive Si and Ti and negative Fe and Ne functions of an ISFJ. Another choice would be ESTP but incompatibility could arise due to Fe child and Ti parent

[@majorbob7211]

@@bfgjrofficial5030 I don't know alot about type compatibilitie but i find that Sensors are better with Sensors and intuitive are better with other intuitive like them

[@michaelcarr9923]

I'm ISFJ, and very opinionated. It use to annoy my wife that I would always argue my point of view if I felt I was right. She didn't like that, and now we are divorced. She wants a man she can walk all over, and that's not me, and never was. Remember INFJ's, we are not door mats for other's to wipe their feet on.

[@ashuranero5721]

Your wife was an isfj and treated you like that? Are you sure she was?

[@omaymah1301]

I realized that they let themselves be “chosen” by other people. And those who tend to choose to be friends with ISFJs tend to be the way you described as people who take advantage of ISFJs and they would just go along and go with the flow.

[@cosmiconni6321]

As an infp the isfj drives me crazy. I will date an istj before i will date an isfj

[@danielsaundernister9215]

INTJ trying to have a healthy relationship with ISFJ :( it's going terribly wrong lmao

[@kelliemichele2844]

So the isfj is best suited for the esfp and we're probably the most annoying type but we're not bad horrible people. Geeesh relax! We have big personalities. We don't have control of it. Wait... Idk why I took this so personally, sorry. The domineering woman you talked about was probably an enfj. They can be very mean.

[@smartneb]

I'm ISFJ married to ESFP who is delightfully social and mostly fun-loving. My husband says he was attracted to me because I never said a mean thing about anyone and I'm super loyal. It works well most of the time 👍

[@LyricsQuest]

Depends on the ESPF subtype. Sure, they're might a lot of "Fun loving" subtypes out there, but some of them come with a very dark edge.

[@Wavecattt]

Awh you are just very sweet people i admire you😘❤️

[@jawary8474]

As an ISFJ and my husband is an ENTP we do NOT tolerate bad behavior

[@joshualevan]

ISFJs are attracted to ESFPs (their shadow) who can be really annoying at times.

[@pearle333]

We go after bigger than life personalities. Most definitely! My exes. I love style, confidence and charisma. Who doesn't?

[@CourageousOtter]

ISFJ so sweet, yet possibly so prickly. Good for you, prickly ISFJ!

[@galindeshannahcamillel.6555]

I'm embarrassed that this is actually true.

[@Moana_moo]

ESFP next please As a matter of friend tastes i do like to keep my loud circle where i have fun(i am not the life of the party though i am a pretty shy ESFP though) and also my circle of quiet friends where i dominate them. I can be pretty bossy though😂😂😂

[@ashuranero5721]

Are you sure you are an ESFP

[@Moana_moo]

@@ashuranero5721 Yep. Thinking between ESFP or ISFP but leaning more towards ESFP

[@ashuranero5721]

@@Moana_moo Out of curiosity, you don't have to answer if you don't like the question. I heard alot about Se doms to be quit dominant in bed. Would you say that is true?

[@Moana_moo]

@@ashuranero5721 i’m 17 and IDK

[@ashuranero5721]

@@Moana_moo Oh, forget my question then

[@anamarijamilos1290]

Yes! I’m a ISFJ. This whole time I was a INFJ. It’s true! I’m a annoying people radar! Especially men. The ones I attract ask annoying questions, they are homeless, or no $$ or something. I NEVER have guys that have $$ or a good job job me. I WAS on a dating app. I feel like I have something on my forhead that says I only date losers, and weird people. That’s why I gave up. I’m not dating anymore. It’s hard for someone with my personality to find “ the right one”. I will NEVER find him

[@sientwa6102]

Don't give up. You just have to be patient plus really trying to sort people out. If there is something not good on someone.. Sort him out. Don't waste your time with that person. See Red flags? Stop dating this one and find another one. And so on.. That way you'll find the person easier.

[@LyricsQuest]

It's a global problem, the "Good men" (i.e., rich men) are far and few between.

[@cindypope4238]

Soooo true. My brother is an ISFJ and his wife is super annoying and contolling, but he always defends her no matter what.

[@nintendonintendont]

Cindy Pope Which personality type is your brother’s wife? Curious as I’m an ISFJ myself.

[@cindypope4238]

I think she is an enfp.

[@robcooper1980]

Do all (ISFJ’s) “put up with the most annoying people”? I personally see the MBTI system as using commonly recognized personality styles/ traits, and associated behaviors, to facilitate introspection and promote understanding of yourself and those around you. I feel that it is so common for people to view the MBTI “personality types” as a limited number of absolute and rigid “boxes”, into one of which every person is expected to fall. People forget that every single personality has the beauty of being unique. Many (or all) of the described traits may very well be present in a single individual, but there will always be varying degrees in which they manifest in an individual. I did not find this video to promote improved self-understanding or to promote better understanding of fellow humans and it is, therefore, unlikely to result in any form of positive change or in improved tolerance and understanding of those around us. However flippant or tongue-in-cheek this video was meant to be.

[@Lemonsmeringue]

I’ve never thought of this. But I did just take the test. 😆

[@eejaypea]

Any other partners of ISFJs feeling very paranoid all of a sudden?

[@grumpysquid]

My ISFJ thought process as I watched this video: Facts? Where are the facts? Increase speed to x1.25 She is wearing a bathrobe that clashes with a brick wall, why is she out in public like that? Yet she still made time for make-up. I hear traffic as cars pass. Still no facts? Increase speed to x1.5. No wait she is talking too fast. Barely makes time to breathe and doesn’t pause between thoughts. All over the place. Decrease to x1.25. She is blurring the line between emoting and facts when she talks about the people in her life without sub heading topics, ughhh. Fast forward x 60 secs. There is no organization here. Her hands are annoying, distracting + No wedding ring on. Getting too Loud too quick, not marriage material, I’m about to switch videos. Abrupt demeanor change at end to promote channel and self, unauthentic smile and superficial kisses and gestures. Scarce facts harvested, beneath a sea of chaos. 6 minutes of life vaporized. Need 60 minutes of peace to recover.

[@AV-tm5zf]

Love the music in the intro...sweet. like a rainy day. You sweet INFJs, take care of yourselves. 🌼

[@wanderer1405]

We do tend to do things we don't like to help other people however... I'm gonna be pretty straight forward... not all of us fall for jerks... some of these depend on the ISFJ keep that in mind as you watch the video.

[@MsJennasisReign]

Lmaooooo 30 seconds in and I’m already annoyed with myself lmao!!!!! I piss myself off regularly loving tf out of shitty ass people for way too long omfg lol

[@twebasenoi]

Lol I feel attacked😂😂