Unmasking the Stigma Behind Autism in Females | Emmy Peach | TEDxUGA

[@adeleoosthuizen2852]

I am 44 years old, reached a burnout at that seriously affected my health at the age of 41. It took me 3 years to find out what was really wrong with me, be diagnosed and get help. Emmy's experience is exactly what I went through in my youth. I am really pleased that studies in this area have gone further.

[@pamparara_9173]

I really appreciate Emmy speaking out. There comes the 'but'. Unmasking might work in close relationships. I can't imagine doing it in front of the people at my work. It would literally ruin my life, and I'm not exaggerating it. Most people will not accept anything that is different from so-called 'standard'. I hope Gen Z will have the guts to change it.

[@razzlejazzles]

Yea I definitely do a bit of masking in the work place, but one thing I noticed, is that a lot of people really appreciate genuine people. I've slowly stopped masking and there are a lot of people who really seem to enjoy being around me. I notice that It is more effective among younger people, than older people. I definitely still mask if I am talking to an older person because they seem to value "professionalism/a bit of corporate fakeness" than "genuine open dialogue." Not all older people, but that has just been my experience in the workplace. I am just happy to be in a work environment that doesn't require me to mask all day as it is exhausting.

[@HostileWorkplaceEXPOSED]

I worked at a toxic workplace and ask for support and was denied and within two months they put me under investigation and try to fire me. I am not sure I would tell my next employer even though Washington state is supposed to be a diversity, equity and inclusive workplace

[@sharoncowart2206]

I agree, so how do we change that? How do we safely "come out"?. How did autistic celebrities "come out"? Because there is a big differance between Dan Acroid and Darrel Hannah. One works all the time and the other one does not. If we can have someone like Einstein on "our team" why do some of us feel threatened to come out?

[@foljs5858]

Yes, people advocating unmasking: it works for friends (and even then, the more facile might fly away) but at work you just invite people's meanness and using your issue to treat you less or as a scapegoat. At least in the average corporate environment. Of course if you are self-employed, unmask away!

[@foljs5858]

@@razzlejazzles one aspect of autism is delayed development (reaching ND mental milestones later or never), what people often see as "immaturity". So for the older or same age people, when you unmask this can come off as "immaturity", unprofessional and so on. For the younger people, this comes as you being "closer" to them and "cooler" in mindset. This probably explains what you said.

[@uuesgirl]

Functioning labels are really harmful to autistic people. I'm sure she's been taught to call people severely or high functioning autistic, but those exist to prevent "high functioning" people from accessing services. I'm "high functioning" and can't meet someone new without a meltdown. I can't work a full time job and every time I come home, I meltdown. I cry every single day, due to being overwhelmed and anxious. I am NOT functioning highly, I just hide my struggles in public.

[@mariecait]

Same. I'm severely agoraphobic which means I can't work and collect disability. I am depressed anxious mess. Sometimes I wish I was level 2 so I could live in group home or institution since living on my own I barely cook and forget to take my meds. High functioning autistics struggle just as much just in different areas

[@belle3055]

I'm the same way. Breakdowns after being around people. It's exhausting.

[@0ceanl0ve48]

Same here. Can hardly do work and I do a job where you have to meet new people constantly. Its the toughest thing.... 😪

[@purplelilytrollvomit]

And by saying there’s a “high functioning” there’s also a “low functioning” and neither of these are compliments :(

[@jennifergauthier3282]

Amazing talk, but agreed, "Low functioning" and "High functioning" are outdated and harmful terms. I'm not sure why those terms are part of her vocabulary as a young person.

[@jacquiventurini7877]

I don’t know how she managed to speak with so much confidence and clarity. This for me is the hardest struggle! Well done to this amazing lady ❤

[@kr3642]

@Custom BatchServices STOP SPAMMING THIS EVERYWHERE

[@elusive_cat]

I’m sure she studied this speech a thousand times over and practiced and practiced and practiced. That’s what I would do

[@Ianwigginsd8752]

😊i used to be the exact sa me wau...petrified to speak in front of people, couldnt speak up for myself becsjse the conflict would caise anxiety on a level tjst was paralyzi g. The way i built my confidence was through practice...the more i prscticed....i rexeived most of my practice through graduate school group projects and presentations. Never in a million years did i think it was possible. She is awesome, engaging, and does a wonderful job explaining her story.

[@NombreApellido-mz6xn]

Everyone on the spectrum is different. Sir Anthony Hopkins is autistic too, but super confident in front of the cameras, and he was petrifying as Hannibal Lecter.

[@Lisa-tn6mq]

She memorized it, as if she were giving a monologue in a play. I think many (most? all?) people who give TED Talks do that

[@sourbongwater6031]

This brought me to tears. I am 21 and recently diagnosed ASD and ADHD, the amount of relief I felt, it was so powerful.

[@Kewlausgirl]

Hi I'm recently ADHD as well!! But my psych now thinks maybe autism a bit too What's your ADHD and Autism traits...? If you don't mind sharing? I am starting to think after watching this that I might have autism as well. But I'll explain this to people and they are like oh you can't have it you understand ppl and don't have OCD or anything like. Just because they don't realise how much I struggle with things. Also I was told as a kid to stop asking so many questions. Don't talk back or back mouth me... Even though I was just trying to understand whatever the reason it was I was supposed to do something... Etc Anyhow if you could let me know that would be amazing thank you

[@ellieedge9754]

Same here, I was crying at watching this as I am also 21 and was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD. The amount of stigma and lack of awareness makes it so difficult for diagnosis. I mask all the time. I am so burnout. I am hoping to find ways to help unmask 😢

[@ellieedge9754]

@@Kewlausgirl so for me I explained, I feel like I am acting all the time. I like being alone like if I didn’t have to go out in the world I would prefer this. I have narrow and intense interests which I spend my free time researching and learning about it. I struggle in some social situations like large crowds and when it came to dating and I hated small talk with people I didn’t like. I couldn’t talk in large crowds like two people at most. I don’t like eye contact or I give to much. I explained how I was masking like suppressing my inner self and copying everyone around me. I have sensory overload all the time in loud and crowded places as well as some smell and textures. That I tap or flap my hands when I am nervous or excited. This is some of the things I told my therapist, hope this helps ❤

[@mikuenjoyerXD]

I am 21 and I have only been diagnosed with ADHD but I'm pretty certain that I am also autistic and I have been doing my own research on it for years now. I told my family about it and I didn't really believe me and they refused to research what makes me feel very sad but they're at least more open to it now. My boyfriend didn't believe me at first and just kept saying "you're not autistic, you're just you, weird strange but beautiful and I love that about you". Which is really sweet of him but I felt like if he understood autism better than he would understand me better and with some of the ways that I behave that he didn't quite understand and caused a bit of a conflict to due to misunderstanding. Then I sent him some resources because he asked me for what I've been watching for my research. he watched all the videos I sent him and then he finally understood what autism really is. He thinks that he might be autistic too and I'm not quite sure yet it seems like he masks quite a bit but he can be very rigid and the way that he does things sometimes (autistic trait). He has been diagnosed with ADHD but I see a lot of autistic traits in him and all of my friends growing up had ADHD or were autistic or both so I feel like it's very likely that if I get along with someone then they tend to be autistic

[@melv.278]

It's empowering to know we're not "weird" or "awkward"... We are just different. And now we finally belong to a community of people who understand us.

[@bridgitmckee3041]

I’m 44 and just received my official diagnosis this past Monday. My life makes so much sense now.

[@sillylittlegoose3]

I’m 40 and have two autistic boys. The mirrors are everywhere, my entire life makes so much more sense now. I’m just waiting on my assessment, but I already feel so much more compassion towards myself. ❤

[@EmpathsProvidence2]

Thank for sharing. I am going to advocate for myself. I am pretty sure that I am Autistic.

[@unclepecos91]

It's really important to know how autism usually manifests in girls, just one warning: please do not believe that this "female autistic phenotype" is the way autistic women always are, full stop. I'm a cisgender autistic male, and I really resonate a lot with it: sensitive, daydreaming, high-masking, socializing physically without really doing it (unless sharing special interests)... And i know there's plenty of autistic cisgender women that really fit in the "male" phenotype: blunt, logical, socially avoidant... I believe the difference between the phenotypes is mainly due to different gender socalization (to which we autistics are subjected just as anyone else) and not actual biology. So please let's integrate the "female autistic traits" in the spectrum, which is a greatly positive thing, just without assuming that women will always be like this and man will always be like that.

[@juliak.9390]

This is so important and so true!

[@DS-zo8xs]

Absolutely love this. Very well said.

[@lord-lala]

Yes

[@amazinggrapes3045]

I am female, diagnosed with Asperger's at a young age, and I will say the reverse is true too. I had a "typical" (masculine) enough manner for it. I know it's not ~the norm~ for me to act the way I do sometimes but I don't care unless I feel threatened by others' disapproval.

[@JaneNewAuthor]

I've read that being an autistic woman is like having a male mind in a female body. I tend to get on better with men than women because I think in similar ways. But there are other dangers with that.

[@helicopterhorsemom5485]

I have just been diagnosed level 1 autism and adhd at age 53 (almost 54)! Your words make sense to me. Thank you for sharing, and I’m so proud of you for being brave to get up in front of people and say the words! It is challenging for neurodivergent people, but you did it very well!

[@Asa-df8kb]

Same here, but I'm 50.

[@DS-zo8xs]

I have not heard of levels of autism. I mean absolutely no harm with this statement, I am just trying to understand, but is level one equivalent to "high functioning"?

[@KNRK379]

​@DS-zo8xs levels of autism refer to how much support the individual "needs" to function. They're highly subjective & essentially meaningless, except to divide autistic people into better & worse autistic. Just a newer way to say "high functioning" or "low functioning," which is extremely outdated & ableist.

[@helicopterhorsemom5485]

@@KNRK379 Thank you! You put this very well, and I didn't know how to answer that person's question.

[@ToneHelix97]

The smile at the end really says it all about her passion for raising awareness about autism. Such a great talk in so little time, for a very misunderstood subject.

[@thexpax]

this made me really cry diagnosed asperger at 53 before the diagnosis was declared autism wìth my "big iq" i hated to be called autistic --- i used to believe bad stereotypes then covid isolation 2 years erased my masking skills --- my ability to appear "normal" though unuse and no practice now my social groups have all ostracized and excuded me for being different i am 63 now and will die all alone in this weird world this presenter is extroverted, sadly i was born an introvert thank you and goodbye

[@danieaainnur7557]

Hi, I'm currently 20 years old. I've been trying to talk with my doctor regarding my suspicions about me being autistic. But whenever I was questioned by a doctor. I suddenly had struggles talking. I couldn't remember how I was during my childhood. I couldn't give a proper answer to them. This made it hard for them to understand me. Other than that, when I bring it up in the first place..I can see their doubtful face. They don't believe me. Especially living in a country where the majority of boys with autism are preventable a lot. This is so hard for me. So please..please. I am desperate to find myself. What should I do???? How do I make them SEES me. I can't stop crying while watching all these autism video.

[@flyingroses]

​@@danieaainnur7557 hi! I was thinking, maybe it helps to write down the reasons for your suspicion and examples from your life beforehand. Maybe you can even already include DSM criteria to make it more clear and to show you know what you are talking about. Make it as detailed as you want. As a starter, you can just give your written explanation. If speaking itself is hard, maybe you could also just write the answers to followup questions. And maybe you have got a friend or family member who can accompany you. It might ease your mind that they are there with you. They can also talk about their experiences (from when you were young) which confirm your suspicions, for extra support I hope you will succeed to get a diagnosis next time you try! ✨

[@thexpax]

@@danieaainnur7557 dear soul, get a list of autistic traits to put down on paper with how you find you match the ones you do you could also list reasons how or why you match DSM (or the ICD in some countries) for the things you can identify about yourself such deeply written work should bring back some remembrances of autistic things you used to do or still do i hope that presenting a doctor you need to believe you with hopefully a full page or more of these researched matches makes you believed ! enough for an attempted formal diagnosis anyway personally i find a level two autistic's very honest videos on her autism also a great way for me to see how i relate to it --- "Dana Andersen" she has over 365 videos and 10,000+ subscribers she talks about a lot of things no one reveals about themself 🧡 all the best to you, buddy if you take on all the research, to present convincing paperwork in your own choice of words one day !

[@MsTD1995]

My husband came to me few days ago saying ‘ you’ve got to watch this ‘ - pointing on a KZbin video that explains that on women , and how different it is than what it looks like in men. That was a day after we have argued on things that are ‘ normal ‘ to the ordinary people , but not for me … I have almost every criteria on the list , that’s insane. I see myself a lot like this girl speaking , so many similarities … even our looks . Thank you so much for sharing this important information ❤

[@Mark-in8ju]

I also have level 1 ASD. Throughout childhood, I always preferred reading science textbooks to prolonged interactions with others.

[@Mark-in8ju]

@Custom BatchServices That is wonderful improvement. I hope he succeeds in any career he chooses.

[@citlalie9791]

I wanted to be alone doing nothing

[@tdsollog]

This is so helpful. We need more destigmatizing neurodivergence, mental health issues and differences in general.

[@bartytaylor2106]

Its de-stigmatise 😉😉... ha howvpedantic of me...

[@ShayQrchestrals]

Or cure it. Remember, some of us really do want autism to be cured if we somehow ever find a way to unfuck our brains through 25 years of development. :D Ty for your understanding

[@alifmuhammadchicago]

It's important to mention how the stigma is based in "classic autism" being defined by deficits. Now that autism level 1 (formerly Asperger's) is a part of the spectrum, it's easier for people to reveal their diagnosis without being lumped in the category of hospitalized and wearhoused patients.

[@taresy6789pp]

I am different, not less I rather stand out then fit in I want to be heard and not stopped accept individualism, accept diversity we see the world differently, but we are seeing the same world through same lens as you! accept us, we are spectrum just like rainbow full of colour and value, we offer a gift to world and see the world from another perspective, sound and noise may hinder us but don't let condition define us but excel us, understanding leads to acknowledgment through this leads to acceptance, peace

[@audreyheart2180]

❤❤❤

[@madiArabella]

I love how this was filmed in April 2022 . My son was born April 11th 2022 and he is now gonna be two next months and is diagnosed autistic and now I am on my assessment journey

I saw this video and didn't hink of watching because of the stigma you talk about but I am so glad I did. This opened my eyes to the possibility that I may indeed be autistic. This broke my own prejudices and, in identifying with many of the things you said, brought a lot of relief as well as encouragement to ask for a professional opinion. Thank you for being you ❤️

[@liliacmoon3280]

this woman is so young and talented, I'm currently seeing a psy because i suspect having autism and I'm about to see for a diagnosis

[@MargauxNeedler]

I wonder if the only way to be diagnosed is for other people to give their perspective on us. I hope not! I have no one in my life anymore

[@lifebyisi]

​@@MargauxNeedlerhi, i know a lot of time has passed, but if you have photographs, things that theachers wrote about you, photos or videos etc etc, copies of those can help, instead of taking someone from your family!

[@MargauxNeedler]

@@lifebyisi oh yeah, that's so true. Thank you! All the teachers said i was quiet or didn't participate a lot or raise my hand. High school teachers might not remember if I asked them today, and it's too bad they didn't leave notes or something or had Parent Teacher conferences

[@jjcox5516]

Never wanted to be tested but always knew the truth ... in my father's line, this is common, often with a touch of ADHD. Heard my whole life how little I slept as a newborn, so much so they took me back to the doctor -- and so it began, always a little high strung and a few degrees off ... just a few and if I concentrated I could hide it, which according to my mother just meant I "knew better" ... and that showed me that she wasn't open to abnormalities in her children. No, the thought probably was frightening to her and I internalized that as a taboo. So many do, it isn't uncommon, but it is exhausting.

[@AJB_twoleftwings]

If you wrote a book about autism based on your experiences, I would likely read it. You write very eloquently. (Positive)

[@kr3642]

I found out I had it last year at 27 years old. ASD 1 and ADHD-I. It's gotten more noticeable as I age.

[@emmalove5080]

My autism also has given me a better understanding of myself

[@yibuseato]

“There is beauty in the spectrum. I encourage those of you with autism to unmask and be your genuine self…. No matter our age, no matter male or female, we deserve authentic relationships with people who see us for who we truly are” 🤍

[@Arachne-qw1vr]

Self soothing needs talking about more often. I soothe with my feet, I even dance. But some kind people showed me how to sit and feel and think through stress and soothing manifests in many ways now. Like remembering triumphant moments and solving problems.

[@Moonlover1492]

I got diagnosed this year with autism. I am a 25 year old woman. I'm happy I was diagnosed too. It helped me understand myself and what I've struggled with for years better. I do wish I'd known sooner. I'm still processing it, but also thankful for finally knowing

[@PixelaGames2000]

I’m an autistic woman I was diagnosed with Autism when I was 4 years old I’m lucky that my parents and family took my autism diagnosis seriously and treated my condition with respect and understanding I still struggled with a lot of stuff growing up I struggled in school because of my autism and my dyslexia I struggle to make friends irl (mostly because I don’t know a safe place to look) But even tho I may struggle sometimes I’ll still always be me I wouldn’t get rid of my autism even if I could because without my autism I wouldn’t be me

[@craigcarter400]

I figured out I had ASD & ADHD just before I turned 34 (December 2017). My GF figured it out about a year ago at the age of 39

[@fischermanuela6850]

“Suddenly Autistic” and “Suddenly School” are books I wrote 😊. I did everything on my own and was still awarded first place by Amazon in the “Biographies of People with Special Needs” category 🎉. Because of my works, a psychiatrist got her doctorate ❤. So there is a lot of useful information in it 😁.

[@autistickenny]

What you said is beautiful. I was diagnosed till I was 38 because my autism presents more like the female model. It has been found that boys that have more feminine traits present their autism the same way. I had elevated estrogen levels when I went through puberty.

[@cotesroyson342]

I am so glad I came across this. I was diagnosed with autism at age 4.5. However, I felt that I never fit into the stereotypes of autism. Like I’m not into the stereotypes like gaming, have high empathy, and people say I am not monotone. I finally believe I found someone I could relate to.

[@le6360]

I was diagnosed adhd at 37. I got diagnosed with autism this week at 39. I feel so sad about how my life has been because I got no help

[@towzone]

I’m a 51 year old non-binary, physically male person, who presents a female autism phenotype, who just realized who I am this year.

[@MisaKaye]

Not sure if you're already aware but being non binary is a lot more common in autistic individuals than neurotypicals.

[@MisaKaye]

A non binary person is more likely to be autistic than neurotypical

[@dannyth5413]

I read and seeked a diagnosis for adhd at 16, basically on my own. When I visited a specialist at a very young age since my brother had learning difficulties, I was discharged by being told "I was doing so well in school". At 16, I got diagnosed with multiple learning difficulties and adhd was amongst them. I was however told to revisit a specialist because I was "so heavily masking through anxiety that there could have been things missed". Not more that 3 months after the diagnosis, I started wondering about asd. I am going to turn 19 this year. I have yet to seek a diagnosis because I am afraid of the stigma. I hope I will be able to do so without letting anyone that doesn't have to know the result. I just want to be able to live a normalish life without having doors closed after people hear about those diagnoses...

[@Ramladon]

This is a good talk and even though it happens more often with women. Autism has been under diagnosed until recent years. I wasn't diagnosed with autism until earlier this year and I'm 43. I also have ADHD and went though a slew of misdiagnosis growing up. I was considered border line genius in testing but, not applying myself. I have constantly been masking since I was a teenager. I made it though the army while the structure was good for me there were many things I struggled with. I then went to college and again forced myself into social interactions. I've had plenty of people that were nice to me but, very few friends and never openly invited to parties or gatherings. While I never had to work real hard on study I have had to work extremely hard on everything else. The more people learn about neuro diversity the better. We can function just as well as the neurotypicals but, it takes more for us and better understanding goes a long way.

[@suusvandijk7596]

absolute amazing talk! thank you so much for showing this side of autism. I think people don't understand or see how diverse it is and how many sides there are. you explained yourself so well! thank you

[@DS-zo8xs]

I have a ASD evaluation set for next year. I will be 28, but have suspected it since I was 14. "Aspergers" was the "high functioning" autism 14 years ago, and at that time is what I thought I might have had. I'm also glad it's all under "autism" now, because it effects everyone differently, wether you can physically see it or not. So "high functioning" is just a slap in the face pretty much. I dont think people mean it in a bad way, they just dont understand.

[@marisa5359]

I appreciate the great insights you shared here. My situation has one similarity in that I started recognizing myself and my numerous struggles when my oldest son and, later on, his little sister were diagnosed. I think my daughter bypassed the usual problems because we had such an astute diagnotician and she had an older brother already diagnosed. As for myself, I haven't ever ventured to an official diagnosis though I have seen the Samantha Craft list and checked it all off. I can't figure out where to go or how to pay for anyone to diagnose me ( the state insurance is the only I can get and it won't cover it) This situation leaves me feeling sometimes I don't really have the right to claim the name though I relate to it all. It also leaves me without much recourse when it comes to seeking employment or assistance. But, very glad for finding these stories. It does help. Thank you.

[@autidiscovery]

This is such an important topic and I'm glad you're shedding light on it.

[@Realalma]

When people lie to me I immediately know and freak out on the inside. I am 100% autistic ❤

[@nancywysemen7196]

a very descent and hopeful report. lots of self work. lots of observation. and "forgiving" self and others. oh boy.

[@maccs19]

My middle brother has autism. Other brother adhd. All diagnosed under 5. Only after being unable to stand myself did I seek help. Deep down I held so much fear about being diagnosed with autism, I was thinking it would be easier having borderline (how silly). In the end I found out I have both. I had a woman at work tell me I should watch love on the spectrum and it made me unfroend her on fb because I felt so much embarrassment that she knew who I really was. I try so hard to be seen like everyone else but in the end she still saw me like this? Why do we feel like this? Why do we feel so much shame for autism? I have so much empathy for my brother but its impossible to hold that to myself

[@MargauxNeedler]

I wonder if I have both, too. You're not alone

[@ChloeJones92]

What are your traits? For her to of noticed

[@maccs19]

@@ChloeJones92 good question, I'll ask my mum because I didn't talk to her about it she did

[@maccs19]

@@ChloeJones92 if I was to guess it would be my inability to make friends or keep them once I stop trying to fit in and make people comfortable. I can be naive and trusting the wrong people. I take things the wrong way sometimes I.e jokes, advice, etc. I don't feel normal and I feel like a square trying to fit through a circle so to speak. I also hate eye contact but I do it for work because I know how it comes across but it's really uncomfortable with people I don't know or if im not confident in why I'm there or what I'm saying.

[@bartytaylor2106]

Firstly get off FB the abslute worst social engineering experiment ever... especially if your not normal like US....

[@marinaneary7502]

Testify, sister! I relate to every word.

[@Elliepixie12]

I have ASD and I manage to work 16hours a week but it comes with the price of anxiety, stress and regular meltdowns. I was having a “talk” with my manager at work (he was talking and I was listening) he said his niece was extremely autistic and can’t hold a job!! This was a very hurtful thing to say to me because autism is a spectrum and we all experience it in different ways this is what makes us unique as “individuals”….. it’s like someone disbelieving the emotions that I feel so very strongly.

[@goosegoosequack]

At 1:58 I was literally looking at that list online to help learn more about myself as someone who has aspergers autism as a female

[@CatsandHatsCrochet]

Excellent job! Thank you so much for sharing ❤

[@rakastellar8955]

how many women (including myself) have suffered because they have been misdiagnosed for decades. Everyone knew something was off with me, they just slapped a different label on it because I was female

[@ipissinlitterboxes]

Bro really thinks she’s Ryan Gosling

[@stownjam]

My family members said something similar. "I didn't know you had autism and adhd, I just thought you were being lazy and dramatic, not that there was actually something wrong with you." I was never considered to have adhd or autism simply because I masked my symptoms and didn't show the more extreme versions of autism in public. Breaks my heart how many girls and women have suffered for so long because they aren't as respected or taken seriously as men and are much better at masking.

[@SummerOf1987]

I even had a therapist who (I know now) was aware after a certain time, that I am autistic. I went there because of addiction. She didn’t tell me „cause it wouldn’t be good for me to know“. Duh! So I had to find out myself couple of months later, at 36.

[@georginashanti4605]

I hope that the research into autism in women and girls receives more funding and interest. There needs to be criteria that are more gender specific and increased awareness so that educators come forward and say something at an earlier stage.

[@Morgan-jn2nt]

Thank you for your talk!

[@arikm8430]

I think it's important to acknowledge cultural differences when diagnosing people. I watched a video on autistic people in japan and they all masked to a high degree due to societal standards. I would say that the higher the masking standards, the more stress the autistic person is under, increasing risk of burnout.

[@ContentRemoved___]

Good stuff. Thanks for speaking up.

[@ContentRemoved___]

@Custom BatchServices snake oil BS. ⬆️

[@linaandersson6112]

Its wrong to call it a "disorder" though because its more than that. You all should watch the TED-talk "Autism is a difference, not a disorder". We need to change the image of ASD from it being a "disorder" because it has other sides too! Alot of the times, the struggles with my Autism has come from an un-inclusive, non-understanding environment, not from my AS itself. And there are so many good autistic traits, so how could it possibly be a disorder? Like high attention to detail, good pattern recognition, being highly organized, good logic reasoning, hyperfocus etc

[@jaydemorton9814]

Its called a disorder cause its a medical term but there is already pretty widespread use of ASC for autism spectrum condition at least where I live.

[@linaandersson6112]

@Custom BatchServices Im glad you found something that helped your son🥰

[@deborahraven-lindley3309]

She's a uni student who had the guts to give a TED talk about something intensely personal to her. I support her courage, trying to educate others about the need for better awareness and the elimination of stigma. I'm not going to pick apart vocabulary when that's what the entire medical community calls it. Others have made this point, but criticizing a young woman who is one of us by calling her usage 'wrong' without offering any words of kindness.... to my mind is not the answer.

[@Ellenweiss1]

Thank you this really, really touched me....I am 61 and for about 5 years or so I've suspected I'm on the spectrum...but it's so hard to find a diagnosis .....especially since one of my symptoms is a lifelong issue with keeping work and finances. And it doesn't seemed to be covered by insurance. I hope this changes soon. Thank you again.

[@LANIkoo]

I relate to so much of this but i wouldnhave joined in the game as a kid. Sharing so you know that even neurotypical people can relate. Expecially under stress 🥰 stress is stored in our bodies which is why people stem. It releases the trapped energy.

[@screamcheeese7175]

My best friend's mom (bestie and I are 32) simply said, when I finally told her about my autism, "Nothing to be ashamed of. You just have a bigger antenna!" Which... Fair. I hear, see, smell, feel things that a lot of people don't lol Though it's incredibly overwhelming some days. I just think it's kinda cool that there are people who don't really see anything wrong with a diagnosis or someone presenting autistic traits. However, I should say that I haven't been officially diagnosed. I have suspected since I was about twelve years old though, when I set out to figure out what was wrong with me since I was never like the other kids, and I always had a hard time fitting in or understanding what people wanted in conversations. By the time I was 19, I had accepted that I most likely had autism. Now, after speaking with my doctor and therapist, the latter of which had me take the RAADS-R (scored 165 yay x.x), neither of them have any idea where I can get a diagnosis in my state. It isn't common for adults, but also, I'm afraid that if I do get one, I won't be able to go to Japan to teach, which I've always wanted ever since I was little. Both Japanese friends and expats have told me I would never be hired by anybody and that the teaching programs, if I were to choose one, wouldn't take me on either. So I don't know, despite scoring high on the RAADS, if I really want an official diagnosis. My dream would be shattered. My nephew, who's turning eight next month, his mom (my best friend) is having the same thoughts with him. He has classic traits, and he's incredibly intelligent and endearing (you should see how he was running around the house a few weeks ago looking for paper to try and prove a space hypothesis of his wrong, then later sat me down to describe the ocean's density levels and amount of pressure based on depth). He does really well for the most part, except he has no friends and only plays by himself. He has trouble managing his emotions and identifying them too, but he really wants to work for NASA and has said so since he was three. The stigma talked about in this video is real, though, and his mom is afraid that, like others, he'll be left out of certain opportunities if he gets an official diagnosis. I don't know why people are so afraid of those with autism, but it's so widespread, this misunderstanding, that it almost seems like we'll always be stuck and get left behind.

[@ragdollkid1338]

Did it hold Elon Musk back? There are many hugely successful autistic people A diagnosis doesn't change you as a person, if you know then assume you are and seek strategies to help you in life

[@blondine931]

I relate to this so much. I also haven't gotten an official diagnosis yet despite suspecting that I have Autism for a while now. As someone who wishes to do research and be able to move around for possibilities I am so scared to get the official diagnosis. For example, at the moment I am applying for a PhD and many interesting opportunities are in countries where they don't let people with ASD diagnosis in so I continue to struggle in silence debating if I should get the official diagnosis or not. Funny enough my research area is public mental health which also makes me think should I just get the official diagnosis in spite of all the stigma.

[@ezza1236]

Autism in women is so different to men, honestly you can’t even tell

[@imba.hjaltalin]

I am considering if I have the diagnosis. I am going into the diagnostic process now next month for ADHD, I also know I have some OCD. I have a daughter with autism. We are very alike. I really hate superficial conversation I will feel trapped near ppl that are shallow to me. I have a lot of interests. A lot of people find the need to ask me questions I think they just rnjoy me telling stories or entertaining them. I feel many questions go over my boundaries. I thought this was co-dependency, i am a people pleaser and am more "open" to others for more personal questions. So I thought my problem was setting boundaries and I have no personal wall. Now going through lists and questionnairs to mentally prepare for the diagnosis process for ADHD I am finding I have a lot of autism points even if they are often not overwhelming compared to neurotypicals. My question is WHAT IS NORMAL? I mean I know I am open, a bit naive, usually assume people tell the truth, sometimes ask for clarification when people are muddy. Especially here in Sweden where ppl never seem to say straight out what they think. I am also a deep thinker. I do hear all clocks tgat tick. The creaky floor in my apartment. I hear my every step, others do not notice. I hate shopping in crowded places but generally do shut myself in though and focus on the task. I train horses and feel I can read their mind but so do many others. I have been around these animals since chikdhood. I am very educated and socially open and lively. I am not an introvert although I do get overwhelmed and need time out. I love people especially different, deep and a bit querky people.

[@bartytaylor2106]

You don't have a problem its the others.. Their main problem is tiny minds.. but then wouldnt the world be sooo interestin if everyone was like us... 😉😉😉

[@ragdollkid1338]

Perhaps the quirky people you love are neurodiverse too so you feel less confused around them. If you have an autistic child and ADHD already then chances are will be diagnosed too.

[@imba.hjaltalin]

@@ragdollkid1338 I have got the diagnosis now, officially. ADHD and they even said it was a difficult case of it, I am like, what? hahaha. On the plus side I was tested for IQ and got a very high point 126 and they said this probably masked my difficulties a lot and explained how I could gotten through all my education. It was quite cool, wish I got diagnosed sooner, then I could have done tests in school with more time and such (the limit is usually 3 hours on the long ones, which was always crazy short time for me as it took me an hour just to get started for real).

[@AutisticBrain]

Great video this is so inspirational. Thank you for your talk.

[@maryhazlett]

Excellent. I was dxed 3 years ago at age 63 (F). And I've heard and read about so many happy with their dx because suddenly their life makes sense. But there aren't any do-overs. Telling people I've known for many years that I have autism feels like I'm making an excuse for behaviors I might have had that a neurotypical found to be inappropriate, particularly in that moment. I've found that I overshare. Talk a lot. Struggle socially. Mask - I now know why every day when I left work my first thought was "I can breathe again!" and why I always want the end seat in a theater or at a table or church. In groups I've always felt on the outside looking. in. Not easy to share.

[@colleend80]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS VIDEO 💝💕

[@mariethomsen5094]

Autism is in equal numbers among sexes and is not 3 to 1. This statistic means we still have a long way to go in identifying Autism in women.

[@dangfd551]

🙏

[@danielreiser2051]

From my own experience masking is not only a woman thing. I went 15 years through the psycho-medical system with many many wrong diagnosis and no real help because of my masking and badly teached doctors and psychologists (not their fault). But i can imagine that there is a stronger tendencie for girls/woman to mask for the reasons explained in the video

[@AKBringerofLight]

I've just been referred for autism and adhd. I'm nearly 48yr woman🤦🏻‍♀️. 2yr waiting list to be diagnosed 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[@mahsalakayan2136]

لطفا دکمه زیرنویس هارو روشن کنین ،تا بتونیم از مطالب استفاده کنیم

[@angelahougas7913]

How do you find an appropriate place for diagnosis with so many resources geared toward children and providers not educated about the growing research in differences in female presentation?

[@ragdollkid1338]

DSM5 guidelines will pick it up if used correctly

[@blondine931]

I have a few question to all those diagnosed - what changed after you got the diagnosis? Is it really worth getting it? Also how to overcome the fear of all the discriminating attitudes and immigration laws that many countries have against people with autism diagnosis? As someone who wishes to do research and be able to move around for possibilities I am so scared to get the official diagnosis. For example, at the moment I am applying for a PhD and many interesting opportunities are in countries where they don't let people in with ASD diagnosis so I continue to struggle in silence debating if I should get the official diagnosis or not.

[@emmalove5080]

I was diagnosed with autism at the age of 20.

[@frogathy]

this is so encouraging and was wonderful to hear. i think i may be autistic after consulting one of my diagnosed autistic friends-i asked her how she found out she was autistic, and she told me and stuff and ended up saying she thought that it’s very likely im on the spectrum too. im 16 and diagnosed already with adhd and severe anxiety and depression, so im really really afraid to talk to my mom about this. im so sure that she would write me off as faking it and not believe me. ive been looking back on my whole life and remembering things and im like oh,, my god. this would explain so much. this would explain Everything. i really need to talk to her to ask about it and ask if we can see about a diagnosis but im so scared that because im a girl and because she probably doesnt know that much about autistic girls that she’ll immediately be like “mm.. no”. does anyone have any advice because im really struggling

[@bartytaylor2106]

So firstly stop worrying it wll not contribute at all ... Think about this; you are one of a very few creative & special humans who will struggle with 'normalpeople' but do great things, dont let all the average people get you down... follow your interests, you may be another Newton or Einstein ... Yez they were too.....

[@mstmarieprov]

When an autistic person believes you're autistic, you're probably autistic. 🌻

[@inkompetenzkompensationsko4188]

Well the thing is that treatment for anxiety and depression differs for neurotypical and neurodiverse people, so the neurotypical treatment won't help as much if you are autistic vs if you are diagnosed with ASD you can seek out treatment from someone who actually knows how to handle your Depression/anxiety with your autism and help you find ways to manage your symptoms as needed.

[@ragdollkid1338]

If you do discuss it though it might help.explain your depression and open up other ideas for treatment that work better. Understanding yourself and knowing you are not a failure but struggling with the challenges of your environment could really help you move on with your life positively

[@maythibo8109]

The problem is how to unmask after training our brain for decades.

[@RupertRumble]

That's what I'm trying to figure out! 😭

[@edwardterure419]

I have the priviledge of having an 8 yr old daughter who is on the spectrum diagnosed this yr. She goes to Rise Up Academy here in Mangere New Zealand and the teachers and school model support all the neuro diverse children here.

[@0ceanl0ve48]

I feel too many of these Ted talks just explain the same facts and how diagnosing is later for girls bla bla bla. That is great but I want to hear more of their day to day experiences 💗

[@katjames914]

A TED talk is not a good fit for going into that kind of depth. There are other places on the Internet better equipped for discussing the day to day challenges and seeking support and advice.

[@thedharmawitch]

​@@katjames914care to share any examples?

[@Arachne-qw1vr]

What if part of the human experience is simply being denied by a patriarchy-centric lifestyle? That human development at different paces, depending on their experiences and stressors in life. What if you learn what something means 10years after your peers or how to emotionally de-escalate conflict two years before other high schoolers? What if we are on a unique path and we just need people to stop pushing us into the 'should patterns'?

[@xo121w]

wow this is great, thank you

[@JuustLikeThat]

i wish she would have acknowledged what a privileged take her whole speech was. getting a clinical diagnosis is not attainable for most. unmasking is not always safe for everyone. would love to see a queer and/or bipoc late diagnosed or self diagnosed autistic person’s perspective. it isn’t this easy for everyone.

[@Zzbff]

Holllyy. You have a much bigger problem than autism. I think it’s called crazy.

[@facesofthefrontier4574]

thank you

[@juliadixon8465]

I was diagnosed at 54.

[@sunshinesideofdarkside]

I really wish TED X would have screened this for certain things

[@danielwader6263]

Is there anyone here that would be up for helping\talking to a husband of an undiagnosed/self diagnosed wife?

[@Stayengenemoacaratsetter]

It’s not a disability or disorder. I think of it as being just wired uniquely. Just thinking and functioning a bit differently.

[@pjkr123]

If I searched this after I react to people about my weird interaction, I might have autism too, right?

[@06howea1]

Great video

[@The_Hamstead]

Love this video!!

[@brigittedevries9087]

65 and since a few days accepting being Autistic. Being my true self.... I have no idea who I really am.

[@patricaromano5012]

Amazing!!❤️

[@natashanatura]

The word 'disorder' is overused in describing interesting and complex character traits. Just embrace people as they are - they are not disordered for not fitting in to a world that is so removed from nature or being overstimulated for being sensitive to these unnatural man-made conventions.

[@nickglover9007]

She says how non autistic people find autistic people 'less likeable' - this is called Thin Slicing (look up: Thin slicing and autism). It shows that most non autistic people want anything to do with autistic people (80% plus) ! You can therefore understand why girls (boys too, but not as good as . . ) mask. It is therefore also likely that the ratio of autism in boys and girls is not that different. Maybe 2: 1, rather than 5: 1 or as she said, 8 to 1. A short present but she is delightful and honest.

[@Bergstromoliver]

Be Honest. I Will Try.

[@Yoyoyoyosuup]

What is a resource i can look into?

[@aBeatlesfan1]

I don’t know why this made me cry… it made me think about my childhood… it made me think about a lot of things I struggled with (and still do) …now I wonder.

[@WhisperedHistory]

I hate the term disorder or disability. Autism is a diffeence. A difference that isnt accommodated by society is not a disability

[@DJFromNewYork]

Emmy is 😍

[@zachjohnson4530]

I have Autism I love Emmy

[@beast_modeftw3603]

I am a male and I believe i am austistic, havent gotten a diagnosis yet, but i related to every single point she made. Im just really confused and if theres anyone out there that knows what its like to be autistic then please reach out, I’d love to talk.

[@lord-lala]

Sorry no one replied to you. I think calling it a female phenotype is unhelpful. Plenty of males have those traits.

[@defectivebarbie]

Women have also been excluded from the practice, study, & implementation of medicine due to patriarchy as well, an important factor to also include in the reality of this subject because its is inextricable from the problem women face in their ability to access resources & function within society & culture.

[@silvioi9061]

Never heard of this 8/1 ratio

[@biancoleta]

Adoraria um vídeo ajudando a precificar, estou começando agora e sinto estar cobrando muito abaixo do valor

[@wholefoodplantbasedmama5398]

I am going to be assessed later this year I am sixty.

[@keifallen]

Male, 40, just diagnosed with ASD and ADHD. I was the boy joining in, learning to mask from a young age. Its not just gender for 'female' autis. Many males have the same experience and go undiagnosed. If i wwrw to look at Male/Female Autism as defined by US medical folks its female autism.

[@serrajav]

I've always suspected I have the Grand Autismo

[@TheSpikestr]

Those heels ❤

[@ITSABELLA]

The doctors gave me inconclusive I still need help pretty bad

[@Selene_persefone]

WTF, boys don't have to adapt, modify their behaviors and beliefs to belong? I hope we go back to that time where I was a girl and listened to doctors and academics talk. Because an error in choosing the words can spoil your message assuming that it is well founded and is not just a subjective opinion.

[@AlexShiro]

Not as much; bc they really aren’t expected as much to be running around caring for everyone and being more sociable generally. Girls were historically expected to be quiet, polite, demure, socially pleasant; this strange concept of “femininity”.