watch this if you're questioning your gender

watch this if you're questioning your gender
HIIII BESTIES! In today's video I provide you with some signs that you might be non-binary or gender-fluid if you're questioning your gender. I love you all so much and appreciate the support on the socials over the past week. Can't wait to chat in the comments xxx

[@MsDickerz]

Love you all so much! Thanks for all of the support! Defo follow me on tiktok too for more non-binary/genderfluid content 🌈🥺

[@SiouxsieSiouxFan555]

Ok, will do 👍🏻

[@sophiep.5040]

love you so much like i can't explain 🥺 ur the best ❤

[@derekb4977]

There's no such thing as non binary or gender.

[@SunIsLost]

yea of course

[@augustsockstrawberry]

Me figuring out my sexuality Brain: what about your gender Me: *loading*

[@yareliramirez2189]

Mood. It’s okay though take your time :) took me a bit over a year to figure out my gender identity

[@MsDickerz]

Haha yuhhhhh!! Me to a tee!

[@MsDickerz]

@@yareliramirez2189 yess very true!

[@BeautyMonster1000]

RELATABLE AF!

[@emily3]

This is it. This is the one.

[@yupthatsgabby]

Not questioning but I’m always down to support Dutchy and other non-binary and gender fluid friends!💛

[@MsDickerz]

Bless thanks gabby!!

[@karl_love5806]

Same!

[@michellelohde8683]

@@MsDickerz i coming out today as gay I used dated a guy but I never into them I more into girls how breaks news to my dad and mum ????????.

[@your_lesbian_neighbour5376]

Hey as a non-binary person I’d be happy to answer any questions anyone might have :)

[@phoenixfront]

Same here 😁

[@MsDickerz]

You’re the best!

[@MsDickerz]

@@phoenixfront eep thank you!

[@darrylwilliams3678]

I go by Dallas I need to change my account name (he/they) How do you u know if you’re non-binary or u just don’t like the way people interpret your assigned gender

[@your_lesbian_neighbour5376]

@@darrylwilliams3678 that can be a difficult one Dallas, unfortunately considering how society views gender and gender expression it can be difficult to separate the two. It sounds like you might experiencing social dysphoria but whatever the outcome, it’ll probably take some self discovery and maybe testing some labels to see what feels right. Hopefully this has been able to help you a little :)

[@Rosalindxxxxxx]

I've been questioning my gender for only the last year and a half (I'm 26) and it has been incredibly difficult. It's been especially confusing, because I've always identified as cis and never questioned this before, so I'm very confused now, but it came at the same time as questioning my sexuality, so maybe they're related.

[@dannieden5049]

Also never felt cis, not that I understood that. Never felt like or wanted to be seen as just a girl because that felt like a limited existence, a half truth, I knew I was more and felt unseen and uncomfortable with growing into a woman and the expectations. Weird how easy it is to see now, just clicks.

[@penphoria]

I genuinely wonder about the difference of being a tomboy and non-binary. Your signs of being gender fluid was wanting to play sports with the guys, be faster and stronger than the girls, enjoying hanging out with the guys, not relating to other girls, wanting to play the dad, not wanting to present feminine nor enhance your femininity, shop in the men’s section, sometimes not wanting to have breast so you can look more like a guy in a T-shirt etc. Those are basically the things that a tomboy do… And I suspect a lot of tomboys too are uncomfortable with getting their periods, because that sets them apart from the guys they hang out with, which make them jealous of other guys' bodies. You said that you before considered yourself a tomboy and an androgynous/masculine presenting woman. What was the thing that made you rather identify with gender fluidity? And why wasn’t it ”enough” (in lack of a better word) to be an masculine/androgynous woman? Do you have to have a reason to why you wanted to hang out with the guys and do “guy stuff”? Maybe it’s just as simple as you liked doing “guy stuff”, and therefore you liked hanging out with guys and wanted to be a guy, because that would’ve made your life easier? How do you know that it was an innate gender identity that made you want to do that? Or does gender identity = your personality and hobbies? I’m sorry if all my questions come off as hostile, that isn’t my intent, I’m just genuinely curious and would love to have an answer 😊❤️

[@alexandralignell5424]

Hi! I’m genderfluid (afab). Just going to share my experiences with this :) Being a tomboy and being nonbinary is different in the ways that one is related to gender expression (tomboy) and one is a gender identity (nonbinary), a nonbinary person can express themselves in whatever way they want and look/act however they want, femme, masc, androgynous, and still be nonbinary. Gender identity and gender expression doesn’t have to be related at all. I noticed a lot of those signs myself when I was figuring things out and what I think would differentiate being a tomboy and being trans is probably why I felt like I felt. I felt uncomfortable presenting too femme because I felt I looked too much like a woman, which made me uncomfortable. Now obviously there’s nothing wrong with being a trans afab person and presenting feminine, it just felt uncomfortable for me. Femininity itself is nothing I have a problem with, I love presenting feminine and wearing dresses and stuff, I just don’t want to look like a girl (I feel more comfortable presenting this way now because I’ve cut my hair and found ways to flatten my chest). So it’s not the femininity itself I find uncomfortable, it’s that certain parts of it makes me look too much like a girl. For a tomboy, a masc presenting girl, they probably don’t have a problem with being seen as a girl (which I do) while they find presenting feminine uncomfortable (unlike me). I’m obviously not a tomboy so idk how they feel but that’s what I’d guess anyways. Wanting to present androgynous or masculine is not just a trans thing, anyone can feel that and want to do that and that’s fine. Its the wanting to present masculine or androgynous because you don’t feel like a girl that makes it trans (for afab people, for amab people it’d be reversed). For the wanting to hang with the boys and not relating to the girls it’s basically the same I think? I’ve always felt very disconnected from my friends, both male and female (mostly girls though), and I’ve never really known why. I thought for the longest time that it was just me having some kind of “not like other girls” phase or smth that I just couldn’t get rid of idk. I think the reason I felt more comfortable being with guys was because I was so used to being one of the girls and well, since I’m not a girl it felt good to leave that? Or something, I’m unsure, but yeah it’s kind of the same again. I felt more comfortable with guys because I too am not a girl, and I felt a disconnect from other girls because I’m not one. A tomboy might, I’m guessing now, feel more comfortable hanging with guys cause they typically don’t do as “feminine things” or act “girly”, idk, but they’ll most likely know the reason for it. I had no problem being feminine and doing girly things but I still felt different in a way I still can’t really explain. Being a tomboy is to do with your gender expression, like how you act and look and stuff, so your uncomfortable feelings regarding different things will be related to expression, like being feminine. Being nonbinary is a gender identity, it’s your inner sense of gender and self and it isn’t affected by how you express yourself. Your uncomfortable feelings will be connected to a sense of gender. One might be uncomfortable because they look too feminine whilst the other is uncomfortable because they look too much like a girl (and like I mentioned, those are different. I feel comfortable presenting femme as long as I feel I don’t look to girl-like, like having a flat chest). No matter how I look I’ll always be nonbinary because that’s how I feel inside. Gender expression and gender identity don’t have to be connected, but they can be, and for trans and nonbinary people your preferred gender expression might give some clues towards your gender identity. It doesn’t define it but it might point towards it. It’s important to realize also that these clues and signs are not the only ones that have lead me to realize I was genderfluid, there’s a ton more, but those are a few of them. This turned out kinda long😅😅I hoped it helped somewhat though. If there’s something I explained poorly, I have a tendency of writing long paragraphs with lots of unnecessary shit so yeah, just ask about it, or google. There’s lotsa info on the internet ☺️

[@McMerlin11]

@@alexandralignell5424 Brooo you described it perfectly

[@inissabri7428]

@@alexandralignell5424 This was very helpful, thankyou ❤️

[@miles-lk7po]

im so ready!! dutchy helped me figure out my true self, and I'm eternally grateful for their help!! much love xoxo- miles (he/they)

[@tk6882]

That’s so great for u congrats

[@user-pt7zd8qs6x]

IKR !! at first they helped me figure out my sexuality and i just happened to run up to them today with gender stuff 😩😩

[@MsDickerz]

I’m so proud of you miles!!

[@lilawalter9724]

I just found out im genderfluid, go by any pronouns!!! thanks for all ur help dutchy ur amazing

[@MsDickerz]

You’re so welcome!! I’m so happy for you!

[@RekindledBibliophile]

As a cis woman questioning my gender - how do you differentiate between gender identity and just general bugbears? For example, I’d love to stop shaving, cut my hair short and not wear makeup, but is that because it’s convenient or because I’m NB? Similarly, I hate gender roles but is that because they’re patriarchal and generally subjugate women or because I’m not in fact a woman? I dislike my boobs but is that because they’re inconvenient and ruin the way I look in clothes or because I’m experiencing gender dysphoria? It’s so confusing 🤯

[@alexandralignell5424]

Idk if this will be helpful or not but I’ll say it anyway. I think you should try to distinguish why you feel the way you feel. Everything that’s mentioned in your comment has to do with gender expression, which doesn’t have to have anything at all to do with your gender identity (it could but it doesn’t have to). You could feel all those things and still be a woman. It’s all about how you feel inside, your inner sense of gender. For me, I stopped shaving, cut my hair, don’t wear makeup mostly for convenience purposes but also because it feels really good looking at myself and not seeing a girl. My hair used to make me real uncomfortable, partially because it was annoying to brush and got in my face, but also because it made me look girly. I want a flat chest not only because it’d look better in my outfits but because I’d look less like a girl. I don’t like gender roles and preforming feminine things because it makes me feel like a girl and that makes me uncomfortable. It’s always the “it makes me feel/look like a girl” that is uncomfortable for me and I think that’s a big thing. I’m not saying I dislike feminine things, I love a lot of feminine stuff, I just feel really icky about looking like a girl, being perceived as a girl or especially perceiving myself as a girl. Idk if that made sense but with that I mean that a few months ago I looked very “girly” I guess, and every time I saw myself I’d think “that’s a girl” and that feeling was very uncomfortable for me. Now when I see myself I don’t see a girl in the mirror anymore even when I wear dresses or act feminine and that makes me really happy. I think what you have to do is basically just think and question. It can be hard to differentiate so I think you just need to take your time and think about it. Gender expression is how you express yourself (looks, behaviors etctec), feminine, masculine, androgynous, and gender identity is your inner sense of self and your inner experience of gender, it’s all in your head (as in your feelings and thoughts), woman, man, nonbinary, agender, genderfluid etctec. It can take time and that’s okay. It will clear up eventually. Edit: Also, I just read through my comment again and thought I should add something. I mentioned a lot that I was “feeling like a girl” and “looking like a girl”, “looking girly”. Just clarifying that I’m not saying that all women have to be feminine and look “girly” or that you can’t be masc/androgynous and still look like and be a woman. What I mean is that for me, my chest and hair looked like what many people would expect a woman to look like I guess, long hair and boobs, which made it hard for me personally to disconnect myself from that feeling of “being a girl”. So when I changed that and made myself more androgynous presenting my mind didn’t make that connection and I could see myself how I wanted to be seen. Again, idk if this makes sense but I just wanted to clarify that I’m not saying women have to look a certain way or that doing these things makes you less of a woman. Just my personal feelings about it when looking at myself. You should think from the perspective of your own feelings😌👍

[@BeautyMonster1000]

I can definitely relate to two things in this video in particular and that would be "do I want to be them or date them?" and absolutely HATING gender roles. I'm currently questioning if I'm genderfluid or not. I don't currently know but I'm going to take my time figuring it out. These videos are quite helpful Dutchy! I can't wait to see similar content from you in the future! 😁

[@LeannesLibrary]

I identify as bisexual, demisexual and am just figuring out that I'm either nb or gender fluid as well. I'm getting a lot of imposter syndrome from it all though because I pass as straight and cis, being with a guy.

[@anonymwlw]

Gender is so goddamn weird for me. Like. Do I feel weird about being grouped with “the girls” because I’m none binary? Or because I had many experiences growing up (esp during puberty) of not being able to relate to my straight peers due to me being a lesbian? Or is it just the standard “not like other girls” thing that happens because I don’t fit the standards set for women by society? Do I like dressing in more masculine clothes because it gives me gender euphoria? Or is it just my style and I shouldn’t read that much into it? The only thing I have figured out so far is that I’m not a guy so. That’s something. The thing is, even if I am nonbinary, there’s not that much I can do without making a big fuss. There’s no established gender-neutral pronouns in my language and I’m very obviously afab, so I’ll most likely always be seen as a woman. And I’m fine with that, it doesn’t particularly upset me (which makes me doubt the whole gender thing even more) but on the other hand it does feel good to present as androgynously as I can. And it’s not like it’s gonna change anything about my life, but it’d be nice if I could figure it out, even if it’s just for my own sense of self.

[@bipashachakraborty7632]

Same feeling 🥺

[@queenemi2433]

I just stumbled on this video and I really relate to your comment… Were you able to figure things out?

[@anonymwlw]

@@queenemi2433 Hi, wow it's been a while since I wrote that. I can't for sure say I "figured things out" but I can say I'm more at peace with how I feel about my gender than I was 2 years ago. Now, the following is just how I have come to think about myself and certainly not a one-size-fits-all, but maybe it can help you along a little. I'm still not quite sure where I stand on the woman/not a woman thing. If pressed, I will label myself as agender, since I don't really have any strong feelings about it, but I'm still fine with being read and labeled as a woman. In English speaking spaces where I feel comfortable doing so, I give my pronouns as she/they, but I don't have strong feelings about that either. In short, I've started to put less pressure on myself to find the one right answer or the one right label, and decided to just go with what I feel like in the moment. Do I not like wearing dresses because of gender feelings or because I don't like the feeling of them or because I'm more self conscious of my body in them? Two years ago, that question bothered me a lot, but now I am less preoccupied with finding out the "why" of it and just accept it as a preference I have. I hope this helps give you some perspective on what questions to ask yourself and what aspects to focus on. In the end: you don't need to know all the answers, and you can try things out all you want. Do what feels good, live like you want to, and if you're not feeling too strongly about the words others use to describe you, let it be their problem.

[@letlovecomeinbeautiful]

I’m Kristen, I identify as being genderflux, and she/they are my pronouns. I have noticed my gender tends to really flux when I am on my period since I am AFAB, and there’s points where I want my breasts to be bigger or smaller. Probably the most dysphoric thing for me is when people are separating people into groups by gender at an event and there’s just male or female. It makes me so wildly uncomfortable that just 😬😬😬

[@quinn5130]

“It is your human Dutchy” my heart ❤️💕

[@MsDickerz]

[@dannieden5049]

Again I related so much Dutchy! I have noticed since realizing and accepting my gender fluidity I feel more comfortable in my fem expression too! I just check in with how I feel when I wake up and express that. I used to feel like my most fem days were out of place in how I presented myself to society, like 'I'm not always this girly, don't get the wrong idea about me, I am not catering to gender expectations', but inside wondered if I was and who am I?! Now I enjoy wherever I am on the spectrum today, I don't have to pin down and label how I dress or express or feel to make it easier on others.🌈🎉Love you!

[@augstuffie8609]

I just kinda wanna come out here tbh considering I can't tell anyone irl 💀 but I've identified as enby for YEARS yet I've only just found out the specific label that describes my gender and that's ✨voidboy✨, which is basically feeling like you're gender is literally a void (like any sense of gender gets sucked up into a black hole, leaving me empty) but with a hint of masculinity (it's like gendervoid + demiboy put together). I usually just use they/them because it's just a safe option but I also go by voi/void and pup/pups and sometimes he/him IF I feel like it rkjkf Thank you for coming to my 6th coming out 💀💀💀

[@bLuebaBBle12]

hey beck/becca here (she/they) and one thing that ive realized after i realized i am genderfluid was how uncomfortable i was with my name (among other things) but it never felt like mine, i had no connection with it and didn’t associate with it. i even remember wanting to legally change my name at one point in elementary school and always trying to find a nickname/variation that i could connect with

[@MsDickerz]

makes a whole lot of sense!!

[@baruvesel4657]

i go by she/they and i have the same experience!

[@Skye013]

Oh, another major thing that probably was a sign that I was not cis - I sobbed watching/listening to The Village by Wrabel (not just the first time, several times afterwards). and that was several years before knowing I was non-binary. I was so confused as to why I got so emotional and upset and loved the video so much, but deep down, I related to the person in the video kind of. I had zero clue what was happening until afterwards. 😅

[@avary404]

Hi everyone Im non binary and I adopted a genderless name Avary. I'm out to my friends, one of my Cousins and my sisters. I want to come out to my parents but i'm not planning to do it for now bc i have no idea how they would react. I'm afab and I use she/they pronouns because there are no gender neutral pronouns in my native language (polish). I love your content, keep it up! :D

[@MsDickerz]

LOVE!!!

[@zimnytalerz]

I'm the friend! :D

[@unicorntomboy9736]

Not related to the video, but I need to get something off my chest. I cannot stop thinking about a woman who I have become quite close friends with, who is in all my classes at university and whom I work alongside. However she already has a partner, which is really painful for me. We are so alike in so many ways, it's almost uncanny, and something I have never experienced before. It's almost like being with a near-mirror image of myself. (Plus I kinda think one of my lecturers is hot too. She has nice hips in my opinion)

[@tk6882]

I think just let it be, I feel bad that the person u think is the one is taken but just remember that sometimes the person that is so similar isn’t always the person u need, and there are more than just one person that u could be with or love, always keep hope

[@unicorntomboy9736]

@@tk6882 I'll try to remember that. However whenever I am with her, it always makes me smile and brightens my day. That old saying " a beautiful rose has thorns" feels quite true for me

[@MsDickerz]

It’s okay to get things off your chest! Glad you feel comfortable doing so here!!

[@unicorntomboy9736]

@@MsDickerz Is this just some uncanny coincidence that someone so similar to myself just happened to meet? To top it all off, we are both bisexual too

[@tk6882]

@Gentleman Gamer all will reveal itself in time, just let things happen, it’s kind of like questioning gender or sexuality u just have to see what happens

[@pearls5277]

omg dutchyyyy This video has literally helped me so so much, I relate to pretty much everything you were saying minus the parts about sometimes liking body curves. I think I can finally comfortably say that I am non-binary (probably should have figured that out from the hour I spent locked in the bathroom crying that I got my period yesterday lol) Your video makes me feel so much more valid in my identity, and that means more to me than you will ever know. As a fellow she/they, I wish you lots of luck and happiness! Now if I can only get over what my parents would think...

[@oatmilkgirly]

sitting on the floor instead of the couch in the back was definitely a choice, and I support that choice hahah

[@wheretheduckswent]

personally figuring out my gender identity was more about euphoria than dysphoria. after realizing i was nb, i realized some stuff was dysphoria, but it was especially about realizing how much more comfortable i feel with people reffering to me as a nb person, not my agab! so to anyone questioning just remember that not everyone suffers dysphoria and that you can try to figure out if something gives you euphoria instead!

[@nuriyah9444]

This video was so helpful thank you soso much for all of your videos on gender identity and expression. I've been questioning for a while now but hearing you talk about things that I personally related to made me feel so valid and like what I was experiencing was real and not something that my brain was making up. Thank you again for all of the informative videos that you make, they're all really helpful and amazing. You make it all sound so normal and I really appreciate that :))

[@andrearivera6311]

OH MY GOD, I swear you are describing my life!!! Thank you so much for this. I needed this.

[@mathilde5928]

Yes another video about gender, I can’t wait💜

[@MsDickerz]

Yesss v important 💖💖

[@mathilde5928]

@@MsDickerz yes it helps me navigating my own gender-crises. Im currently trying out female name and pronouns online and being referred to as she makes me feel so euphoric. At this point I’m almost sure that I’m a transgirl. Also getting the help I need irl.

[@justwarm2151]

Did someone else here play with cars and LEGO and not with dolls during your childhood just to show everyone around "I'm not a usual girly girl, you idiots, stop dressing me in skirts and dresses, I hate feeling weak" even if adults really didn't care?..

[@mackenziebradshaw9514]

I loved this video! I have always been cis and identified with being a woman, but I also love giving off masculine energy or throwing away the binary all together. I have recently been considering changing my pronouns to she/they, but I also don't want to be inauthentic as to disrespect the lived experiences my lovely non-binary or gender-fluid humans out there. I guess some more personal discovery is needed!

[@sewper_swaggy4363]

Thanks dutchy, you've helped me through some really tough times. But now I'm comfortable with myself and happy. 💖🥰 Keep making vids, luv you! ❤️

[@MsDickerz]

Yayy!! I’m so happy and blessed to hear that!😊😊 love you too!

[@catdesousa9348]

I'm ready for this video, like truly am I just need this, to see my true self and much love Dutchy

[@MsDickerz]

Love you!❤️❤️

[@mw1838]

Thank you! All these vids are helping so much and I think I’ll know who I am soon!

[@pixie_fire_fox_fairy]

hi! I have recently been thinking alot about gender and i was wondering if someone could help me make things a bit clearer. Maybe a great litterature tip? Steer me in an illuminating direction s'il vous plait!!Not trying to offend! just trying to learn! thankssss 💕 ah. yes. here goes nothing. how do genderfluid/non-binary people make a distinction between disliking gender stereotypes and intrinsically feeling like they belong to a different gender/no gender? How is one sure that it is not just a superficial thing? Like, not wanting to wear formfitting clothes/heels/lipgloss because the mere hint of a curve/stereotypically "girly" feature might potentially be associated with the male gaze on womens sexuallity/being gentle/not assertive etc etc. Or just the fear of being viewed as a concept and not a person, and therefore enabeling others to reduce you to an object. I certainly fear these things. I, as a woman, do not feel a burning longing to conform to societal gender roles. However, I do not intrinsically feel like i am less of a woman because of that. Belonging to a certain gender does obviously have certain connotations, but does that really mean that one is just simply not that gender without the (often not too pleasant) stereotypes. I would gladly like to be a woman without all of these exterior markers. i guess it all boils down to jusification. like, how does one justify using non-binary terms to describe oneself when all the apparent aversion/liking towards gender-relate aspects in life seems to be related to exterior factors? i reallt want to understand these things, but obviously seem to be struggeling a bit... help a girl out please 🐳

[@brettcarruthers8838]

Very interesting watching you grow and change and learn more about yourself over the years.

[@jayohara2766]

I came out as non-binary gender-fluid this week, and have been binge-watching a ton of content. Thank you for sharing your experience, it's helped me a ton to validate my feelings on the subject. I'm still trying to figure out how to express myself on a day-to-day basis, but know I'll get there eventually. I use they/them or she/her.

[@thelovers404]

I am a cis girl, I have not experienced any of these things, but wow this is so eye opening on how different people think and are Xx

[@skye5516]

This confirmed everything for me queen

[@Creeping_Cryptid]

As somebody who has found out they were Bigender, and a freshman in highschool and are apart and friends with the people of LGBTQ group of our school ( it's a small group that only our people apart of know about due to obvious reasons) I can say this channel help me understand more and more of the community than what I knew from my current knowledge, plus my mum being a lesbian with a fiancee ( love you mummy and jazzy ❤️ ) this is truly helpful me learn more, thank you Dutchy 😁

[@valeriaortega1562]

Dutchy you’re glowing! Ahh I’m so glad you’re posting about this :) I’ve been thinking about changing my pronouns haha ❤️

[@MsDickerz]

aww thank you so much wow :')

[@potato-nv8mh]

I've been feeling super dysphoric this whole week and that's why I wore my comfort hoodie the whole week. Anyways, do any of you guys cosplay? Because my Dabi (from BNHA, My Hero Academia) cosplay makes me feel so euphoric! I have this nice short hair wig which looks amazing with my rather masculine face and then his jacket, it's truly awesome! I have always been so envious of Anime boys, like especially the skinny, smart ones in Shonen (okay I don't know any Shoujo so there's that) kuje Dabi, Aizawa (BNHA) or Sanji (One Piece), I am so envious of how they look, like I LOVE flat chest okay, like I'm so aesthetically obsessed with people who have flat chests (not just Anime) I stare at it all the time and I. Want. It. My pronouns are he/they and yes, he's my favorite character and I have no idea why.

[@Forealz5]

Watching this video and your last video has helped me come to terms with being non-binary. I watched 5 hours worth of videos about gender and nonbinary people which helped me realize my true identity. After watching you last video I came out to my mom as non-binary and she accepted me, and I don’t think I could haves one it without your videos helping me

[@thestrugglingoptimist2541]

I just recently started seriously questioning my sexual orientation and gender identity. I have always had an attraction to other girls/women. However, I tried very hard to deny it because of my involvement in religion. Since recently leaving religion, I have been doing a lot of self discovery. I can relate to a lot in this video. I have never fit in with other girls. It annoyed me that all they wanted to do was flirt with guys and talk about girly things. I preferred to play sports with the guys. I also felt nervous around other girls. I have always felt tougher and stronger than most girls. For most of my life I just considered myself an alpha female. However, I also never liked my feminine body, and would wear tight sports bras and loose clothes, trying to hide my shape. Not really sure yet what all this means... However, I think I'm probably bisexual or lesbian. And possibly gender fluid. Still need to do some more self discovery. I also need to educate myself more on the LGBTQ community. Having spent most of my life in religious environments, my knowledge about a lot of things is severely lacking. I am really glad I found this channel. I look forward to watching more of your videos!

[@rodentsofrandomness9203]

HEY sorry I’m late but LOVE YOU DUTCHY Also this couldn’t be better timing Bc I’m currently questioning my gender

[@MsDickerz]

HOPE THIS HELPS :’)

[@rodentsofrandomness9203]

@@MsDickerz tysm

[@nadhirferras3090]

completely agree with u Queen

[@Georgia.blew__]

You are literally my fav human on earth! I always smile when you post and when I watch your video🦋🍄✨🏳️‍🌈

[@valerynorth]

Hi! Not sure why the YT Algorithm offered this tome today but glad it did, just so I can add my support and all that 🙂 I'm nonbinary genderfluid, but get read as cis (i.e. male) a lot because of body features that won't go away easily (e.g. I'm a hairy bear type/figure). I've never felt any real attachment to any particular gender as such, relate strongly to the "not fitting in". I guess the big clue when younger was that I grew my hair out long, and I always went in the middle but wanted to be at both ends at once, when SVP classes had pupils stand on a line between male/female to say how they saw themselves! I use my own custom-built pronouns because I needed just the right sound/mouth-feel. Hae/Haem/Haes/Haeself is what works for me, although He/Him or She/Her depending on my current expression is also fine.

[@jennifercrowe1161]

Would you ever consider getting a binder for days when your masc side is more present

[@MsDickerz]

YUP!

[@rileymallinson4298]

Not gonna lie I’m really excited to see this 😁

[@MsDickerz]

I’m so glad Riley!! 😊😊

[@kyoko938]

I love your content Dutchy!

[@MsDickerz]

thank yoouuuu!

[@jo.k.4210]

yess kearaa!!

[@olivialammi9294]

currently indentifying as genderqueer cause im very much questioning. this helped a lot

[@sophhiebn]

just the video I needed rn tbh

[@MsDickerz]

💖💖💖

[@mikeyc7747]

damn i relate so much to this... recently found an old diary of mine a while ago that basically read “why don’t people call me a boy” 😂 still didn’t figure out i’m trans until about a year and a half ago

[@abbycadabbie]

This just unlocked a core memory 😂 I was ALWAYS dad when playing as parents lol. Oh my god I’m just now remembering that playing games, I always chose or created a male character 🙃

[@aspen2888]

Literally coming to terms with my gender at the same time you have tbh😂

[@aylawong5129]

i identify as a demigirl rn but still somewhat questioning. I can relate to a lot of what you said! Especially with the “male” clothing section and the relationship with gender and thinking im just a tomboy. I’ve always hated most “female” clothes and never wanted to be perceived as a girly girl.

[@SunIsLost]

1:58 yea nice!

[@abbycadabbie]

I also had to come to terms this year with the fact that I spent nearly 8 years with my exhusband because I was trying to live through him. The way he dressed, the way he acted, even as far as how we had sex. It took me a long time to realize that I wanted to be those things. I struggled a lot with my identity and had a drug and alcohol problem for 10+ years because of it and didn’t want to admit it. When I was using, I felt more able to be myself. Now, I’m almost 1 1/2 sober and have never been this happy all because I have finally been honest with myself.

[@user-wc8ix1tm2j]

anyone else wish they had shapeshifting powers to change on will to how you want to look?

[@haleytrammell7812]

I'm genderfluid and you helped me figure myself out! Thank you!

[@MsDickerz]

I'm so glad I could help xx

[@lexib2424]

Can you still be genderfluid if it’s only switching from girl and non binary

[@MsDickerz]

Yes I believe so!

[@MsDickerz]

Doesn’t have to be between girl and boy at all!

[@yae7348]

Can someone tell me if you would still be a lesbian if you only like girls/non-binary but still like male cartoon/anime characters?

[@Mika3344_]

Ok wait..... this like kinda helped like this kinda like just makes me think😐 AHHH😃 thank you

[@Mika3344_]

Like I never really thought like this like I identify as a Demi-girl but like idk I see people be like I’m not a boy so don’t say he and I’m like why does it matter-... and know that just ughh ok thank you you made me think

[@mylife-23]

I'm Bigender 🌻 I relate to your story 😊

[@MsDickerz]

[@SunIsLost]

3:35 yea

[@luisas.4834]

I've been questioning my gender for just a couple of Weeks and it's been confusing. I could relate alot with you in this video but I always thought (and partly still do) that these things had other reasons. For example hating my Boobs. I hated my boobs since they are there and I always wore sports bras and wide shirts to hide them. But also I was made fun for having a bigger chest since I was an early bloomer and the only one with boobs. Like I don't know if it's a Gender thing or just because I got bullied. Some Weeks ago I cut my hair really short and my Mother told me that I looked like a boy and even she didn't meant it as a compliment it felt like one to me. I'm just so confused it feels like I've been going through my first Sexualitycrisis just 10 times worse.

[@SunIsLost]

1:35 yea

[@SiouxsieSiouxFan555]

Gonna go to a gay bday party tomorrow!!!

[@MsDickerz]

EXCITING! have the best time!

[@SiouxsieSiouxFan555]

@@MsDickerz I’ll try 🍑🍊🤍🌸💖

[@kyleesorrell2697]

When you said those things about puberty and saying you wanted to be a guy…. I TOTALLY RELATE I hate when girls talk about boys and puberty, it makes me really uncomfortable…. Any tips? Or words of advice? Love you!

[@kyliecarrasco10]

Hi Dutchy, I’m Kylie 16 bi she/they thank you so much for this video it really helps to relate to someone else

[@SunIsLost]

7:58 yea *THIS*

[@emxtionalgaming6340]

This is literally my whole childhood thanks so much for saying how I feelll!!!! I am non binary/ gender fluid! And pan and demisexual

[@laurenxurarakacosplays859]

i recently figured out im genderfae* which is cool, also now that im in in-person highschool i go to gsa (gender & sexualities alliance) and i did a slide presentation on it! (my friend, who ive educated and theyre fluid themselves, covered for me bc i was absent, but i made it lol) so spread a bit of awareness bc its not a super known label. im finally comfortable in the labels i have; bi and fae :D fun stuff!! *genderfae/doe is a form of genderfluidity between non-binary and feminine (also, my pronouns are she/they!)

[@Ragingbull123]

I am gender fluid and I dress fem some days masc other days I am bisexual & I live for these videos you make me feel so safe in my skin dutchyy 🥺 your such a amazing human

[@MsDickerz]

LOVE

[@Ragingbull123]

It is your human dutchyy sounds so right I love that for you ❤️❤️❤️

[@MsDickerz]

thank you! I thought so too!

[@chaoticdemonpunk]

I'm not even questioning my gender but I'm still upset that I missed the premiere haha

[@MsDickerz]

Awww sorry!!

[@jesterr7133]

I understand the date them/be them thing. I was assigned male, but I am nonbinary and pansexual, though I have only dated women. When I am attracted to a woman, it takes me a while to figure out what the attraction is. I can never figure out whether I want to be with her, or if I just wish I looked that cute in that outfit, lol. I wonder how it feels to be her. It's a struggle. I can definitely identify with that. It's confusing. I have to get to know them for a little while before I will date them. I also have that attraction to trans and nonbinary people, and I don't really know why.

[@Lovelyalaajiah]

Mama everything that you just described in this video was exactly 💯 meeee when I was growing 💗

[@finch3333]

I consider myself to be he/they nonbinary, technically genderfluid between those two sets of pronouns. I prefer they, but still really like he/him, and there are days where that is my favorite pronoun. I've made a few nonbinary friends and they are all cool. I'll probably be moving in with one of them that has accepting parents when I turn 18 as 8 have no doubt my mother will hurt me. Father knows and is chill, I will keep in contact with him.

[@SunIsLost]

2:58 true

[@goodvibes2000]

I think I'm definitely questioning now

[@MsDickerz]

love that for you!

[@KaraJenkins]

I doubt you’ll see this but I need you to help me out or if I’m just crazy. I’m bisexual I use she/they and consider myself gender fluid. Obviously when I use “she” I’m a women But when I feel like a “ they” I think of myself as just a person/non binary person. Csn I be gender fluid and still be non binary when I feel like a they? & when I feel “fem” I say Tom boy because I don’t like using the word fem then when I dress more boy ish I say masc. am I crazy ?

[@SunIsLost]

0:25 lol

[@xander-ajax4120]

I'm already non binary but it going go be awesome

[@MsDickerz]

Thank youuuu! 😊😊

[@xander-ajax4120]

@@MsDickerz Your welcome and I hope you can make if your friend is lgbtq

[@noahgroos7745]

just a question: is it normal to feel comfertbel with they/them pronouns in english but in your own language not? bc I do

[@MsDickerz]

yessss

[@noahgroos7745]

@@MsDickerz okay thank you dutch. I love you

[@Newearth444.]

Heyy I have a question... I am a bi/lesbian what ever girl and I find it very easy to understand, where trans people and gay people come from because you can break it down to the animal world where it's also represented. So I always think "okay animals are also for example bi, so I can absolutely understand/except it with humans"... I don't understand now where gender fluid people come from. Like is this "a real thing" (that sound mean sry) OR is it something that comes from gender roles in our human society that you can't identify with.... Would love to get an answer :))

[@oliviersoable]

You are handsome Dutchy :)

[@MsDickerz]

Why thank you :)

[@oliviersoable]

@@MsDickerz Its feel good to embrace the 2 side of gender! I want to be pretty 💅

[@ROCKONplaceboforever]

Another amazing video thank u so much bestie i am using she / they now u helped me alot . Alot more makes sense to me now and feel more comfortable . Thank u . Im stephanie / steph for short ily bestie ❤❤❤❤❤

[@MsDickerz]

thank you bestie xxx

[@julestreasureArea5t1]

I am transgender and love to dress feminine, yet I am only out to some friends and my gender therapist. Spend most of my time as male and it is not what I want. Working to officially change name and start medical transition. I am also bisexual and understand what you mean about dating. Love cis and transgender women. From time to time check out men. She/her here.

[@mackenzief4329]

Hi Megan please read all of this! I was wondering if you go by a different name now or if you still go by Megan? Also, I know it was about a year ago, but could you say something about the pride flag burning in the Toronto school? Also, just wanted to say thanks for this video! It really helped me shed some light on me being non binary! I think I am 100% non binary, and it's all thanks to you! I don't know what I would do without you and I love all of you, including you being bisexual and genderfluid!

[@justsomebody..]

Me: am i bi, straight, gay, trans lesbian, male, female, a sexual? My brain: look your friend's doing sumthin funny My friend: male straight Me: not funny. Im every thing I wanna ne Brain: its not what u wanna me Me: i wanna be gay Me: im bi Me: no no im straight My brain: just choose dont f w dead goose Me: wtf Me also: why the f im commenting this My brain: cuz yure bored Me: ok

[@MsDickerz]

💖💖💖

[@sparksoflife101]

Literally me but in a girl version 🤣🙈

[@narnar2360]

i identify as nonbinary (i am afab and don't experience dysphoria) but more specifically i would say i am very gender apathetic bcz i don't vibe with the concept of it HOWEVER i insist on being seen as a genderless person. my expression is also very fluid but right now i present rather masculine/androgynous. my gender identity journey was and still is pretty wild but i would rather not tell it here and now, all i will say is that there was a lot of denial and internalised misogyny and transphobia in the beginning. right now i'm unsure of what pronouns to go by because where i live in the language is very gendered. irl i say i go by any pronouns but my friends mostly use he/she (and i totally vibe with that) but the pronouns that describe me best are they/them. hopefully if i go to a country where the language isn't so gendered people will use they/them for me. Edit: also i changed my name socially twice and now i started using my legal name because i feel comfortable with it and a three-letter genderless name that is literally the name of a fruit, despite that it's very meaningful to me.

[@narnar2360]

update: i'm cis and feminine now and believe in totally different ideologies

[@reyybii]

Dutchy made me realise I'm bi but now I'm questioning my gender but I think I'm non binary? Idk I'm still questioning

[@MsDickerz]

it's okay to question your gender :)

[@reyybii]

@@MsDickerz I came out as non binary a few days ago thank you so so much for helping me with this

[@Kayla-uq1fz]

Me taking forever to find out my right gender My brain- your non- binary and lesbian and pan Me- I’m ok with that 🤷🏽‍♀️😅☺️ but I’m not out to anyone

[@siobhan_bradleyxoxo]

I've been questioning my sexuality for YEARS and have not labeled myself because I don't know what I feel and Now I'm also questioning gender but I'm mad because I HAVE"T EVEN FIGURED OUT MY SEXUALITY UNIVERSE LEAVE ME ALONE PLS. But Love your Vid's Dutchy very helpful

[@aha2580]

It's really hard year, firstly I figured out that i'm lesbian at march and still try to accept it and live with comp het and now I'm not even sure about my gender

[@theo.597]

gender envy and attraction towards guys feel so similar fr

[@sophiep.5040]

do you think that choosing the guy character in every game possible is kinda the same as wanting to be the dad in the 'mom & dad' game? cause i always always choose the boy character, and i would do so now i think 😂😂❤

[@MsDickerz]

YESSS

[@miriamritz7503]

So, I always felt like a cis girl, because during my childhood, I always been closer to females, had more females friends, and could feel somehow relate to them. And I never wanted to be a guy. When I was teenager, I wished my breasts would be bigger, but I also sometimes wished to have a chest, so I could walk shirtless. When I had my first short haircut, I didn't mind at first when someone would see me as the guy, but then I got any and wished people would see me as the female. Which is why I wanted to grow my hair a little, at least until my shoulder. I cut my hair short again and I like it much better, because I have become bored of the bob haircut. Yet, I can feel related when it comes to gender roles. I never liked make-up and I would only use them on special occasions (such as talent shows), though there was one time, when I let one of my friends do make-up for me. I don't mind my breasts, but I still sometimes think, what would be like if I had no chest. I am fine when someone refers to me as the female, but during my teenage years I never liked to be called lady and later in a few years, I also didn't liked to be called dude either. Though I am fine being called lady or a female, I still don't like the idea of being a benign girly. At childhood I was girly, at teenage I was more tomboyish, and now I do have feminine personality, but I do dress differently depending on my mood. And when I was closer to my adulthood, I wanted to be girly again, because I thought that being tomboyish is only for “teenagers.” The other thing that I feel related to this video is about the period and I really hate them, because it also makes me uncomfortable. While I’m fine, walking the half-shaved legs, I still never liked the idea of shaving my legs, because it does hurt and I don't like the idea of being more "pretty" if you shave your legs. And when I think about it, if I was a guy, I wouldn't be forced to shave my legs. I also wouldn’t mind being a guy, for a few days or a week, to find out what it feels to be a guy. Another thing, I can remember, is that, during my teenage years I did wish to play as the guy and I still wouldn’t mind trying to play as the guy. And one or two month ago, there was one guy who thought I was a guy, and even though I did feel misgendered, I also didn’t care if he mistaken me as the guy, so I decided to not correct him. And of course, there are times, when I think, that I wish to not be born as a female. Does, that means, that I might be somewhere on non-binary spectrum or I just like to express my gender in a different way? I apologize if my comment sounded offensive.

[@Bella-xu1wq]

Hi I can relate to a lot of your struggles but to be honest this is just what every female person experiences. No woman is comfortable with her body completely (periods suck!) and a female can dress any way she wants to. Not liking make up or girly clothes doesn’t make you any less of a woman or non binary , it just means u are a person who has a different style preference and doesn’t subscribe to the stereotypical “girly” style which is okay and how many women choose to express themselves. Sorry if my comment doesn’t make sense I just think it’s so much healthier to have this mindset than to worry about if you are “non-binary” because at the end of the day that doesn’t really mean others will perceive you any differently so you might well dress and act however you wanna act without apologizing for it. Hope this makes sense and helps

[@miriamritz7503]

​@@Bella-xu1wq Hi your comment was actually helpful for me, and your comment does makes sense. And thank you for replying to my comment, because it did helped me to understand myself better. I was just worry, if my comment was offensive

[@user-wc8ix1tm2j]

i also tried to imitate how my male classmates and friends behaviours and mannerisms

[@MsDickerz]

yesss!!