What happens when women stop believing the lies | Mina Shah | TEDxBocaRaton

Mina believes empowering all women to confidently say “no” to what they do not want, so they can gracefully and unapologetically speak up for what they “do” want, gives them the power to positively impact their own lives, the lives of others, and ultimately the world.
In her work with women, Mina Shah has found that as varied as the goals and accomplishments of the women who go through the program are, there is one thing that the women who achieve their goals all have in common. They stop believing the lies. In this powerful talk Mina shares the 3 types of lies that hold women back and what happens when they embrace the truth.
Speaker, Strategic Consultant and Founder of the Mina Meetings. Mina Shah has spoken to over 1,200 groups and consulted over 150 business owners. In her interaction with women from coast to coast Mina discovered a real need for an organization focused on sharpening women’s personal and professional skills. To meet this need she launched the Mina Meetings, a year long program which empowers women to “Know Their Value & Claim Their Worth.”
Mina believes empowering all women to confidently say “no” to what they do not want, so they can gracefully and unapologetically speak up for what they “do” want, gives them the power to positively impact their own lives, the lives of others, and ultimately the world.
Prior to launching her business Mina was the only female speaker on Tony Robbins team of speakers who traveled around the county speaking on his behalf. Mina's personal achievements include climbing the highest mountain in SE Asia as well as completing a 12 day trek in the Himalayas.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

[@trailerkeller6760]

I think the biggest lie I learned was that “Collage gets you a great job”

[@juliethounskane9503]

College doesn’t get you a great job but it opens many networks that can lead to a great job. The individual gets the great job through perseverance and resiliency. College isn’t for everyone though and def not necessary to be successful, but it’s a good gateway for some.

[@jeanpaulgartier3404]

Collage teech me too spel

[@anguswiebe]

*COLLAGE*

[@NicoSmets]

@@jeanpaulgartier3404 haha, that cracked me up!

[@InaudibleYT]

It’s the American dream

[@BD638]

The biggest lie I stopped believing is that I need to go into science to become successful. I'm a gifted artist and aspiring designer. I thought I should go into engineering for me to find a good job for this and even though I got accepted to most of my picked university programs, something came out of me and was like "THATS ENOUGH, NO MORE LYING TO YOURSELF." Now I'm happily pursuing a direct design program that will take me to the career that I've been dreaming about ever since I was young. All this happened Bcuz one weekend, something inside me had enough of the bs and burst forth. I'm glad this happened, I feel at peace now.

[@justinparker7902]

Boo same. I was always told computer's were the future.

[@demonbre24]

This is crazy that this is the first comment I saw. I am completing applications for grad school and I have been feeling like I really do not want to go into the sciences.

[@chynanhua5562]

She's an amazing woman. Good for her to turn the negatives in her life and empower herself and others. We need more women like her.

[@Ryno_D1no]

Agreed more woman and men similar to her would really enrich our world.

[@sharon9270]

Minah is a true empath, that's what this planet needs more of EMPATHY

[@chansonb6244]

@@MisterKzzt why wouldn't she

[@roshnik5137]

Instead what this planet has is more of narcissism and sociopathy

[@oka5969]

@@grimm3972 calm down edgelord

[@nevinanivo]

Fantastic talk, thank you. I wish every girl knew there are better scenarios that being stuck in a bad place. ridding myself of abusive and insecure partners or leaving jobs that simply didnt feel right or challenge me enough has always been rewarding on the long run. i think the gut feeling tells you when you are lying to yourself and we will have to listen and most importantly think everything through and accept that mistakes are part of learning.

[@theminachannel]

You are so right. Our gut truly does let us know. Many years ago I was on atrip abroad and was visiting a Monastery in Thailand and at the entrance to the cave like area where the monks lived they had the tenets by which they lived by translated from Thai into English and the one that I will never forget said, "Once of life's greatest sins is to deceive oneself." Amazing you were able to walk away from the bad situations that were created in your life.

[@ozlemdogan8923]

Nothing can be closer to the truth. Straight up, unedited, raw, transparent. Like that girl in the change room I grew up and transformed. It's taken me 41 years and now I am passing on this gift of truth and love to my daughter, strangers, anyone. Like you said, when your internally conflicted you can't hide this because you pass this in your energy, what you say and don't say to others. You influence their life's taking power and self love away from them. Before you can change others, you need to change yourself. Only than can you spread your love!!! THANK YOU!! You are living inspiration.. I hope one day my impact can be greater also!! 😍😘🙏🏼

[@user-zq8gx2bq7g]

Ozlem Dogan hi. Reading your comment gave me a charge of positive thoughts. Thank you.

[@DesireeHEspinoza]

Brought me to tears. God bless her. Beautiful woman inside and out.

[@CatMom5050]

That little girl in the change room with the angry mother sounds a lot like me. My parents told me daily that I am worthless, a burden, I ruined their lives just by being alive. I believed them for so long. I heard it so much that I thought it was all true. I let this idea control my life for too long. I know what they said is not true but I still made choices based on their ideas of me. Just now, I know that they were struggling with failure at work, relationship problems, etc and they were falsely blaming me. I tried so hard to make them happy by being quiet, staying locked up inside, too afraid to experience life because I was terrified to ruin someone's life for just being alive.

[@shethewriter]

Megan Middleton same. My parents still treat me that way

[@CatMom5050]

shethewriter I'm so sorry. My dad changed when a gf he had told him about her experience with her father being that way. He apologized, and tried to be nicer but it wasn't easy. Its still not easy. My mom still treats me the same way. She only "loves me" because of my children. Its so disturbing to me that after 25 years, she still has not seen problems with this. Hopefully, they will change and try harder to be nice to you! I am not like them with my children. I tell them I love them everyday and all that wonderful stuff. I can't imagine saying any of those things to them that my parents said to me.

[@face-in-the-crowd]

Megan Middleton I never understand parents like this....do they not have friends to put them in check? !

[@CatMom5050]

We did not do much socializing. School,then home. Weekends were spent at home or with grand parents. We did not have people visit our house ever. Not even on holidays, as we went to family only.

[@face-in-the-crowd]

Megan Middleton hope you're ok now ♡ (I meant if the parents had friends btw)

[@katerinachristodoulou9878]

I can tell she must of helped hundreds of women and through this video defiantly thousands, you go girl! I love people with unique missions

[@theminachannel]

Thank you love! That is the goal!

[@imasoftwarrior]

I'm 22, unconsciously i don't feel loved so i'm codependent in my relationship. I have always done what the other's told me to do and i have always believed the horrible things they said to me. But it's my responsability to change and not to victimize myself. I'm trying to find myself and to feel good being alone and not to depend on others.

[@beastwing3272]

Lupita's Makeup Your name... Sounds like another countries woman name... Your not from america are you? Must have so many bad childhood stories that a lame!

[@pink-uv3th]

The first step to becoming independent is financial independence. Try your hardest to get a job and start a savings. It is possible to get out of a dependant relationship, I believe in u

[@emilythesongbird2306]

What an empowering and insightful talk! I love how courageous you were in pulling the curtain back to remind the girl of your truth. It seems that your own abusive has created a deep well of compassion in you that has helped so many other women to find their voice and speak their truth. You have modeled that for so many. Thank you!!!!!!! In Deep Gratitude, Emily

[@theminachannel]

Thank you so much Emily!! Yes, in many ways my abuse has been a huge blessing. I can honestly look at someone in the eyes and say "It'll be okay" Thanks for taking the time to comment. Warmly, Mina

[@ronaldwarren9317]

Mina Sha

[@musicmiraclesaroundtheworl9418]

And they will be stronger because you hold the space for them. This is what we have to do for the part of this that was abused as children. I am deeply grateful.

[@ZachRose88]

This was a pathetic talk by a worthless woman.

[@hollyannhughes653]

Zachary Rose. you soundlike you're intimidated by strong women that refuse to be mistreated by boys like yourself. you must be some catch..u have the free time to watch women( speak truth,speak positive msgs) and type a trolling message. you're opinion is so typical of abusers. are u a woman or child abuser?

[@lisastarr6214]

I am shocked at how few likes there are on this particular TED talk. To anyone reading this and loving this talk as much as I did, please pass it on. I worked as a make up artist for many years, and I've heard women (and men) of all ages say self-deprecating things on a regular basis. Her talk was wonderful, brave, refreshing.. an important and incredibly relevant commentary---especially during the times we are living in. I applaud her, and commend her for her contribution.. for helping others to reassess what beauty, and being beautiful actually means.

[@barbrampofu2043]

Lisa Starr

[@fairelaine]

You are amazingly bright, compassionate and insightful. I've listened to this talk a couple times and thank you. Wishing you good health and happiness.

[@ShivaleeKurimbokus]

Beautiful talk, thank you! We really need to dissolve all the lies we've been told for thousands of years and start seeing our strengths in modern society. And for the men... we still love you and yes, there are many lies in modern society men are still being told which need to be addressed as well - just as important.

[@theminachannel]

Thank you for this thoughtful comment Shivalee. Yes, we absolutely still love the men.

[@Ryno_D1no]

Well we only see them as lies today because our position in the ecosystem has soared to new heights. In our 1st world society we are no longer dependent on the other gender. Instead of having men going hunting you just have 'people' going to a grocery store (something everyone can do). Modern society just allows the best to come from both genders...most the time (I could do without our modern drama)😒.

[@dakotatrue12]

Shivalee except you haven’t been told lies for thousands of years. You’d be in a casket.

[@riselle1]

So good. My passion is empowering other women and this talk is so helpful.

[@riselle1]

I teach women especially single mothers to succeed... I help with their mindset and putting financial affairs in order. And letting them know that anything is possible in life.

[@eeek7686]

Ms. Lowther, forgive me for asking, but might this be a justification obscuring an Intimate lie to yourself? Ms. You Beans, are there free resources you can recommend to Ms. Lowther, and the many others in similar situations, who can't, feel/perceive they can't spare funds, or believe money is necessary, to invest in themselves? THANK YOU BOTH FOR RAISING THIS ISSUE OF WHAT I HOPE IS A MYTH THAT MONEY IS A PREREQUISITE TO A MORE SATISFYING & PRODUCTIVE LIFE.

[@riselle1]

Linda Lowther you can.

[@eeek7686]

People like ME don't. Financial coaches at CCCA are free. Maybe it's CCCS, it's been awhile. Life coaches vary, but I've had jobs where they were included in benefits.

[@TenaRoberto]

Im currenly on unemployment in Ohio. I desperately need resources to get out of verbal/ emotionally abusive marriage that has me paralyzed.

[@musicandeye]

Wow. She made me cry. Very hard for me to hear/see kids being emotionally abused. Amazing 14 year old response. Great talk.

[@shirleyperez7490]

I really loved her speech. I think I really needed to hear this right now.

[@dianelbruno9334]

Brought tears to my eyes.

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

I'm kind of shocked by the amount of hostile comments here. I don't get it. If you can get something out of this talk great, if not, someone else can. What's the negativity for?

[@jasminaragoobeer1917]

I was touched and moved by your talk. I feel inspired by your courage and the choices you made by the pain you experienced.

[@Bluepigeonn]

Women are powerful but only a few of them know and are ready to accept that because they are often stuck in a bad place amongst abusive or insecure partners/ family members. We need to believe in ourselves and turn the negatives in our lives in to greater things.

[@raeleenstp]

So powerful as you very well know. We met at Leverage with Fabienne. I’ll never forget you. One day I’ll also give a Ted talk. Hugs my friend. It was great to watch you on this stage. You have once again inspired me. PS I JUST (finally) yesterday signed up for a Tony event

[@jstyle8711]

thank you, strong women like you make this world a better place, im sure speaking out in public is nerve racking and youve got courage, thank you :)

[@theminachannel]

Thank you J Style!

[@cindydownard]

Women need to learn to: .....Stop being a follower, be your own leader. YOUR own self value & worth & your own perception of YOU, IS WHAT MATTERS most: )) NOBODY knows you better than YOU! More women need to listen to this. Get what YOU want in life ...based on YOUR terms, not others. It's all up to you & and you CAN do it ....ON YOUR OWN: ))

[@eskimotion1]

Shining, shining, brilliant star. Thank you, Mina Shah. Thank God for you. ✨☄💥🌺

[@camillehendricks9819]

I'm crying! I love you ladies!!!! 😭

[@nicoles7800]

Excellent and brave talk. Thankyou so much.

[@McFraneth]

Wow. Bless her compassionate heart.

[@laraoneal7284]

She is so prescious and inspirational.

[@greenelf912]

Brilliant heartfelt speaker thank you.

[@Fiveandime]

awesome for standing up for yourself and the little girl. Thank You!!

[@geraguinand]

I've watched many talks now, many inspirational speeches... but this is the first time I end up in tears with one! Such a powerful message! Yes. Don't believe the lies!

[@larasmith2931]

🦋so important to remember you are so beautiful and confident if you ever feel less then confident get stronger in your faith and embrace your Confidence

[@blunt785]

Mina you are amazing, I feel like you just got a plank of 4x2 and knocked me out it makes sense. Thank you

[@ana-paulagabay1356]

This brought me to tears. It is so easy to forget our own worth and how capable we are of doing great things.

[@jfurber10]

Mina, you're an angel.

[@bethdarrow4489]

This is beautiful. I got rather emotional towards the end.

[@veenak1000]

Yea me too. Her voice got heavier at the end. I feel her.

[@humanidee118]

You're one of my kind. Thank you for what you told that little girl.

[@j.n.sloane]

Excellent. Well done.

[@flaviadovalle8350]

One of the best talks I ever seen!

[@vanessamacdonald9153]

What a great and interesting listen - thank you! So true, and compelled me to think about my hidden lies

[@barbaraengle-witovicz809]

Thank You ! very powerful! I wish I would have started my self evaluation long ago! What a revelation!!!

[@raspberry1011]

Amazing, I like how brave you were to pull the curtain back. I'm sure you made the little girl brave too. What an incredible gift.

[@yaninasalerno2787]

Mina you are simply amazing. Thank you for sharing these insights and your personal life challenges with us. You've always been an inspiration 🙏🏼

[@shwetaamrao7315]

THANK YOU DEAR MINA SHAH FOR YOUR ENLIGHTENT WORDS FOREVER EMBRACING IN OUR HEART MIND 🤍❤️♥️💙💎✨👌

[@Kecili8]

It was awesome !!! Thanku

[@TheSjumc]

love this! thanks!

[@jchannel3033]

Great speech!

[@AuntySuuuue]

WOW! That's all I can say. Thank you for sharing your story.

[@avishekmukhopadhyay6086]

Real happiness comes when you cook for your husband and is obedient to him.

[@johanamarin7904]

You are amazing Mina! Thank you for helping change the world. We need more people like you!

[@witcheswimble9097]

You touched my Heart...truly! I feel your sincerity.. thank you for this presentation.

[@booth9553]

Fantastic, absolutely fantastic.

[@PodcastLaunchLab]

SOOO GOOD!

[@rajshreesinha9830]

Thank You ❤

[@tellmemohi]

im crying, i needed this :)

[@elizabethwilfong7385]

Thank you.

[@AboveGlassCeilings]

This is a fantastic speech. Thank you so much!

[@NewBeingQueenTalkShow]

Thank you for the story. The truth that we believe about our self can very well be a lie and hold us back. My hidden Lies.

[@theminachannel]

So welcome NewBeing Queen

[@ebruozyurek5266]

so good what you are sharing!! thank u!!

[@gayathrir6953]

❤️❤️

[@julikam6312]

Goosebumps

[@winnieo4968]

Powerful!!!

[@MarinaPier77]

Amazing, honest and inspiring talk. Thank you!

[@krisanabrooklyn8017]

Thank you Mina

[@Keksdich]

this title should say PEOPLE instead of women. imo coz those tipps are good for men, too :D great video, thanks for uploading

[@sciencenotreligion5607]

Men are a lot more likely to listen to a man's advice, not a woman's, but yes it's good for men to hear, too

[@genjochetz3663]

If she gave the talk as a "men's talk" women would also relate, but I doubt we would complain about it being labeled a "men's talk."

[@barnaliadhikary9421]

Keksdich ask everyone to use " they" instead of " he" as a gender neutral noun... " people/ human beings " instead of ' men'... Women feel just the same way disconnected like you with so called ' male specific gender neutral words' Even English grammar is male privileged

[@ZeeJayBay]

Please speak out against androcentrism every time you see it. You'll be A LOT busier. You will definitely need a team of outsourcers to help you.

[@rachelcampbell7629]

That was very good to watch

[@izabelasobanska6138]

Apart from the talk being brilliant, I'd just like say that you've got amazing arms wow

[@Treezp1]

Thank you for speaking up. Theresa

[@theminachannel]

Thank you Theresa. Xoxo

[@cadence70]

Great job

[@ElChicleSeMePego]

Change the world girl, you go!

[@rangawhitearm]

Very interesting talk. I really enjoyed it

[@giselacruz4805]

so inspiring 😊💕

[@theminachannel]

[@claudiap.s.7005]

Beautiful talk.

[@imasoftwarrior]

Loved it

[@dashaaxelsson9636]

very informative, thank you

[@glorious6779]

Wow this was incredibly powerful. ❤️

[@johnmiller7453]

The familial lie is about all we get as an inheritance from our parents whether we or they know it or not. Very few humans are capable of being truly loving parents. Just the facts.

[@pink-uv3th]

So true. My parents sucked

[@brendag3232]

thanks

[@sigifredouribe7636]

The best tedx.. BAM!

[@mysli01]

it's great!!!! thanks!!! :-)

[@bestxXbudXxlayf]

another beautiful video!!! love ted talks

[@kiterafrey]

Could that 3 day conference be on a yacht?

[@HoneyO]

yes

[@laraoneal7284]

Love u Minaj. Thank u for the the truth n u passion,

[@unknown95-s2d]

Love!!!!!!

[@stevebrayton5462]

ThisisKail

[@priyankagundu1191]

The biggest lie I heard is If you study hard in childhood and complete secondary education your life will be well settled

[@isabelleferrand1853]

J'aimerai tellement comprendre cette vidéo ! A quand les sous-titres en français ??? I would like to understand this video so much! When will the subtitles in french ???

[@lauramatiu4938]

Inspiring

[@SLlop]

Go girl

[@Suzy585]

I loved Suzy's deals!

[@CherryBombBuzz]

Υπέροχη. ΥΠΈΡΟΧΗ!

[@rasro]

"This is how great I am - this is what a client did for me." Nice.

[@ebinger224]

You know, I'm pretty great too. In fact, my greatness has been growing and growing on my for quite some time now. It's gotten outta hand quite frankly. I didn't even know until someone pointed it out to me that me, carrying around that full length mirror everywhere I went, was a sign of narcissism.

[@heva7830]

For some reason I am hoping that that little girl sees this a connects with her.

[@joepeeer4830]

great

[@Emma-gj5pk]

Aw poor woman I totally would of loved to adopt her!

[@conairswag7568]

What about the men that fell trapped

[@0oo00]

Is this from a way back machine...like 50 years ago?

[@shethewriter]

That dressing room story was like my whole childhood wow

[@WECantThink]

You should watch the Cassie Jaye TED talk next.