What makes EXMORMONS Angry?

In this video, our hero rambles and babels about topics he is barely smart enough to talk about.
We explore questions like; "Is there a building inside my head?" and "What happens when you put a lion in the ocean?".
yes... Smart stuff today.
If you find this video helpful please sure it with others, if you don't reach out and tell me what you would find helpful. [e-mail]
One day ill start making better thumbnails.
#exmormon #psychology #leavingreligion

[@scrambledegg347]

Your videos are excellent! Very helpful. Thank you!

[@ubermormon9611]

Thanks I hoped they would be!

[@scrambledegg347]

@@ubermormon9611 I actually paused the videos numerous times and took notes 😂 you put my feelings into words that I was unable to identify and express. I hope you write a book with all of this information because it would really help others. I’ve been able to shake off all of the LDS dust except the lingering anger. Your video helped me finally let go because for the first time I understand WHY I have remained so angry. I think I finally graduated from the post-Mormon academy! Thank you!!

[@ubermormon9611]

@@scrambledegg347 Wow im actually a little out of words at the moment. I am so happy that happened for you! It feels pretty amazing when the anger slips away. Anger is a post-Mormon epidemic.

[@scrambledegg347]

@@ubermormon9611 I agree. It’s great to watch a million KZbin channels where post-Mormons bask in and share their anger (which I watched for years), but to date, you’re the only one I’ve discovered who actually brings a resolution to the triggering emotions. It’s unhealthy to remain in a place of anger, but when nobody is offering a solution for how to actually move on, we remain on the hamster wheel and relive our misery with each other endlessly. Recycling all of the negative feelings and experiences is great for a while, it gives a place of belonging, but in the end it’s just another miserable tribe to identify with and be a part of. I started having suicidal ideations wondering if there was no place to find happiness. After I watched your video (several of them) I literally felt like I’d FINALLY come to the end of the long and winding road that Mormonism had planted in my brain and hardwired into my emotions. It was literally a “BINGO!” moment for me. Life-changing. Thank you again and again and bottoms up! I’m making a virtual whiskey 🥃 toast to you!!

[@ubermormon9611]

@@scrambledegg347 cheers 🍻 friend. I hope to see you poking around the comments! NO MORE TRIBALISM.

[@nute742]

A buddy of mine had a dad who just recently passed away. He (the dad) was was tormented at times throughout his life with addictions, struggles, but was always loving and hopeful too). He was also a very "brilliant" artist too. However he always defended the mormon faith (even though he never felt like he fit in to the "mold" of it all the time). I think many of us can relate to this too (in some aspects of their lives).One quote I like that his son told me (that his dad said) was "All of Us" are Mormons here on earth but we just don't know it. I took this as a quote to mean that we are all more equal + closer than we know. I think this leads me to the scripture that "God is no respecter of Persons" . So anyway food for thought and God Bless :)

[@Mustardmanor]

Leaving a high demand religion is a traumatic experience. Having one's core beliefs changed is traumatic. One feeling to handle trauma is anger. If one calculates how many hours had been spent serving missions, serving in callings, etc. for something they do not believe is true anymore, it makes sense to be angry. If someone gave up their passion to be a stay at home Mormon housewife, it would be difficult to realize they did so... if a man served a mission instead of playing college basketball, it would be difficult to accept. Anger makes sense. Especially if members feel they've been lied to (and inadvertently been lying to themselves and others.) Anger makes sense.

[@ubermormon9611]

The temptation to give into sunk costs is so real.

[@Mustardmanor]

@@ubermormon9611 agreed. There are so many sacrifices which we have made for the church. For those who have had faith crises, the loss is enormous. The investment into the church did not give the end result we planned on and hoped for.

[@123mneil]

Here are things that I think helped me move past the bitterness and anger: 1) Acknowledging that I made a failed sacrifice and that it was at least in part my responsibility. The more responsibility I can handle the better I feel. I think it's because it helps me feel like I have control of my life instead of feeling like I have no control. 2) Validation and being heard by practicing Latter-Day Saints. Loved David Ostler's Book. 3) Realizing that by choosing to walk away didn't suddenly make me a better person. That will be a life long thing and it is something I should activity strive for. If I could be hoodwinked by something that seems obviously false to me now, what else am I blind to? 4) Accepting that I did gain valuable lessons during my time as a practicing Latter-Day Saint. 5) Letting Mormon me accept my leaving. 6) Letting my current me accept my staying as long as I did.

[@ubermormon9611]

Number 3 is brilliant. Mind blown

[@othersheep5491]

Been out 40 years, and it still makes me a little angry when I walk past the sign in my parents home that says Families are Forever. I’ve resisted writing “in spite of the church” in magic marker underneath, for what feels like forever. The only true wisdom consists in knowing that you know nothing. Bill and Ted. Be excellent to each other. Oh btw, I’ve found obedience and sacrifice, as we were taught, are way over valued. I wish all those who leave the church have most excellent, soft landings. Peace

[@BobSmith-lb9nc]

Joining or leaving a religion is a very common thing, especially in an age of overwhelming secularization. It is normally a socio-cultural thing, rather than a confrontation with the absolute. That is, such shifts are seldom done based on rigorous science or logic. Indeed, most such shifts have more to do with what seems friendly and comfortable. People naturally seek Gemütlichkeit. All of us should be mutually respectful and tolerant of diverse views. Live and let live.

[@thuggie1]

I fund I was just empty but I was like that befor but I was feeling like that over everything what helped me was the writings of ramana maharshi and Vivekanan to the point I deconstructed not only myself but what is reality and what it the me that looks out. In the end the process of self realisation and self actualisation really helped me, I no longer have any anger towards it the one thing I do have is an understanding of how even the head ups in the church are in a state of illusion creating a reality controlled by false assumption of reality in a way I see them as trapped and me free of the trap

[@nathanbigler]

I'm keeping my anger because my kids continue to be mistreated by Mormons in Utah and by LDS family members. My anger motivates me to participate with activist groups and projects.

[@ubermormon9611]

I am sorry that is happening to your kids. I really hope things like that stop happening in Utah. Nothing wrong with holding onto anger for a while. Everyone needs the anger stage for a different amount of time.

[@yeshalloween]

I don’t want to be angry, but this phase is lasting a long time. My dad killed himself as an LDS bishop. He spent all of his every last spare minute serving the church and spending time with other people’s kids, and not with me. So he never knew me, and he never met my children or my husband. The church had my brother on an extension of his mission at the time so who knows what might have happened had my brother come home when he was supposed to. I’m angry because I wasn’t allowed to grieve properly because I was supposed to just rejoice in the resurrection . I’m angry, because every decision I ever made was at the very least loosely based on my belief in the Mormon faith . So many things I didn’t pursue, so many things I didn’t allow myself to dream. I am angry because I allowed Mormonism to give me hope that I was special. I was somehow part of a chosen generation, or I was one of god’s special, chosen daughters. I’m angry at myself that I believed myself to be better than in anyway. I am angry how sad and uncomfortable I’m left feeling and realizing I’m nobody. I am angry that I’m afraid. Because once you have children, everything changes and it’s harder not to let despair creep in because now suddenly the desire for an afterlife is all the stronger because I can’t bear the thought of myself and my children not existing anymore. But now I have lost that Mormon comfort of an eternal family. And I have nothing to replace it with that brings me peace. I’m angry because of how much the women in my family suffered due to polygamy and doctrine that made them less than. I’m the product of polygamy. I’m the great granddaughter of prophets. So I feel anger towards my ancestors and on behalf of my ancestors. I am angry at the pride I once felt in being part of this family, but also because it was never anything that I earned or did and I was never important to any of them anyway as a woman. I’m angry that my mother and siblings are still so fully entrenched in Mormonism, that we can never have more than a superficial relationship as long as they remain so. They refuse to try and touch what I have learned or feel what I have felt, despite their covenant to mourn with those that mourn. So we are at an impasse so long as they can never venture into the territory, in which I now find myself. I’m angry about the narrative that the church places on people like myself, which is so unfair and it’s accusations. My anger and pain and fear is so multifaceted and touches every area of my life and my thinking processes. I find myself reverting back to my Mormon ways of thinking regularly, including desperate prayers which, of course, go unheard, even though I started deconstructing five years ago. I feel I will never be rid of this and for that I feel like I will never stop being angry to some degree. I’m stuck in a place between logic and misplaced hope. I will never be free.

[@ubermormon9611]

I am so sorry to hear all of this. I don’t know how you are holding yourself together after everything that has happened to you. I think you sound brave. You are not nothing. Thank you for being here and sharing all your deepest feelings with me. Email me if you ever need to talk. [e-mail]

[@Mustardmanor]

Your anger is justified, healthy and normal. I am so very sorry you've had to experience all of this pain.