When Someone Tries To Act Tough on an Airplane | Joey Diaz

[@mrkillums8219]

From now on I will tell all the black women I meet, that ima rip down the beyonce poster 👍👌

[@dt-lg2oc]

@S T Ξ Λ L T H cuzz she is beautiful And by you saying that means that she is better looking... I think

[@erif1179]

@El Matadores You're telling the black woman that beyonce is an ugly bitch and you would much rather have a poster of this new black woman you found on your wall.

[@thelastmemphian]

S T Ξ Λ L T H dont need my beyonce poster anymore cause u so gorgeous

[@Apg07]

Haha I was trying to figure this one out, thanks guys

[@offtheleashman]

Had to come straight to the comments 'cause I was like what does that mean

[@andreranch6161]

Lee sounds like a kid being tickled by his aunt LMAO

[@stanleysalvatore6476]

Hahahaha !!!!

[@SavedByTheBLOOD04]

I love it. 😂

[@Twisted_utopia]

Jewish Pillsbury dough boy

[@ry4nx]

lmaooo thats fkin hilarious

[@infinitypoker6383]

Best one I've read in a while

[@Liverpool094]

nothing beats a good diaz story.

[@demz6365]

@jay everyone exaggerates when story telling...and it makes it better, stop being a pussy talking shit online when you know that in person you don't care enough to butt into a conversation about Diaz ans the only reason you do it here is bevause you want attention

[@colbyb8358]

jay gtfo here lame ass.

[@Gblonkers]

DM gb72 bro you just made me realise something. I disagree with people on here but I wouldn’t do that shit in real life in person. My life is a lie

[@SpoilerAlert__]

I'm sure Joey will agree with me, but coke will beat them

[@jer.z.3691]

#facts

[@yungdisney]

Tom Segura doing Joeys voice is perfect 😂

[@ashchaya7676]

Sure is. Tom appears on the Rogan podcast one time where he's telling a story about travelling with Diaz on a plane and they're both high the whole time. There are so many Diaz lines he delivers in his Diaz voice, it's fucking brilliant, not to mention hilarious.

[@Jbkbmx]

Idk how Joey doesn’t burst laughing hearing his spot on voice impression

[@minyjackass8421]

Ash Chaya joes is spot on but bert hits those lower Joey quotes perfect

[@Shamrockjason]

Yeah

[@evanabbott2737]

“This fuckin’ asshole on the plane....”😂

[@wpracy]

Nobody makes Joey diaz laugh like Joey diaz. True legend

[@jakesharp5510]

Will Pracy I have the same problem except Joey also makes other people laugh. Lmao

[@pinkberryconsumer4059]

I always say that many many many years after Diaz passes away he's going to B just as Infamous is Keyser Soze

[@ryanlyle9201]

Theo Von always gets Joey cracking up hard too

[@priyachand2697]

Lmao 😭 hands down, best comment!

[@aegonbreakspear9102]

@@pinkberryconsumer4059 I hope that day is a few decades to come... Joey Diaz is the only thing I live for sometimes

[@badlt.8029]

Joey “my leg weighs 265” Diaz. LOL. What a great storyteller! Truly one of a kind.

[@Ken-pv9zu]

You could be Johnny MMA... this leg weighs 265.

[@daniel-zh9nj6yn6y]

His leg weighs more than Joe Rogan.

[@etazza1092]

Imma keep kickin you and your fuckin hitler buddy

[@k.j.hallingswest5231]

Joey "I really opened up as a gentleman" Diaz Ya gotta love this guy.

[@brandondismang7343]

For some reason I always imagine Joey Diaz being Nate Diaz father.

[@jonassal6937]

I thought his trainer was Joey. That's what led me to him lol

[@francois9747]

What, how? They're so completely different.

[@sparky-281]

@@francois9747 there both bad muda fukas 💀

[@mojomuss]

Epic comment

[@pauljones9576]

I thought that

[@yamamohammadnoorstani1640]

“I got these weeds under my nuts” LOL!

[@batboy5023]

" his hitler buddy" XD

[@martysheersn8061]

I like Joey diaz more as a personality then a comic and he’s a damn good comic

[@herpallday1284]

Marty Sheersn then why even make your dumb ass statement to begin with?

[@eternalvigor1190]

Marty Sheersn joey diaz’s comedy is pretty good. Joe Rogan’s comedy is god awful. I like Rogan more as a personality and commentator than his cringe awful comedy

[@TGSTYNTWA1]

Pumpin George what the fuck is an away team

[@Sapardi]

The Hash Minging Masher it’s a sports expression.

[@max1milli96]

Herp All Day you need to smoke a joint and calm down sir

[@martypayne5650]

7:00 “They’re fuckin hawkin each other to death” 🤣🤣🤣

[@mukundr1204]

It’s a line that could have come out of the sopranos 😂

[@DillonLarche]

No ones gonna talk about how tom looks like if lee had testosterone

[@crockybird3287]

Ooof

[@MCGeddelti]

i tough lee started working out on one of those 0 insulin diets XD XD letdown

[@YANILLIONAIRE]

they bring it up near the end of the show

[@LUCKYNY718]

@@YANILLIONAIRE Wu Tang

[@actionjackson1173]

Lee on TRT😂😂😂

[@Marvin-ey4sq]

"Turn the phone off." Joey Diaz - I'm about to get Sauer on these Krauts!

[@independentthoughtprocess1868]

Joey's German impression has me on another level right now. 😂😂

[@kazejah1014]

Im hurtin lmao

[@hawaiianprestigecars8493]

IndependentThoughtProcess it’s french lol They were french

[@independentthoughtprocess1868]

@@hawaiianprestigecars8493 ah, my mistake. Still funny though. Thanks for bringing me back to the clip. I needed to laugh today.

[@lisetteeliseparis7070]

😂😂 love it!

[@LucaBakiMMA]

@Luke so many sissies in Germany its crazy. Calling the cops for everything and anything.

[@el-zw8zf]

The MALOOK eye 😂

[@RJCE420]

When your on the 20th Joey Diaz story video and you start to laugh like Lee. Take a 10 min break, Rinse and repeat.

[@Jesuisderetour87]

😄

[@mowgli6067]

😂😂😂

[@versuliu1424]

i love how this guy still exists and is himself in this "politically correct" time. my kinda guy.

[@gekyumeisthename9270]

versuliu 1 “it don’t apply to me.”

[@tenitri5023]

There’s not many like him left.

[@tenitri5023]

Gekyume Is the name lol did he say that? About pc culture?

[@DEVDissers]

Tenitri yes lol

[@evanabbott2737]

That’s exactly why Joey is so important in these crazy times...I hope he lives to be a hundred🙏❤️

[@drewsnacks3293]

Joey Diaz lived 10 lives

[@beenjamminbuttons7771]

Foot L Johnson dude I don’t get how so many people eat his shit up. I think some of his shit is funny but he constantly lies out his ass. he comes up with bullshit stories on the spot and tries giving them credibility by throwing in specific names or insignificant details. it is often painstakingly obvious

[@fishineryday]

YOU'RE THE AWAY TEAM LOL

[@LizardKing1324]

"The Sopranos was hotter than hell at that time, so I was having different incidents like this every weekend"

[@alexanderprince146]

forgedabouted 😂😂 yeah fuck this guy

[@GGGboi]

Foot L Johnson stories? That’s disrespectful to a lot of dead folks

[@captainshinysidesofthehmsb8900]

@Foot L Johnson You've obviously never heard of Bruno. Nobody messed with Bruno! (My Dad taught him English)

[@gammawave1739]

Foot L johnson yea there all gone now all those ittalian gangs are gone. Funny thing is the ittalian mafia still runs alot of buisnesses in new york its sad. All that blood money and the cops let them do it

[@jewbabydono]

@Foot L Johnson bro you are hurting these kids feelings out here 😂😂😂 be easy big guy, shit 😂😂😂

[@ethanbrown812]

Turn ze phone off

[@friedipar]

You don't just break the rules next to a german dude

[@captainshinysidesofthehmsb8900]

Nein.

[@jewbabydono]

I would've acted the same fucking way bro, oh my Lord. I cant stand rude ass people.

[@MBeist-vi7ho]

Haha, white man bad

[@lisetteeliseparis7070]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Right? God, been watching this every so often and still laughing.

[@mirandacosgrove472]

Tom’s impression of joey🤣😭🙌🏻

[@paulvalmadre5493]

When I was 16 I got on a plane for a two hour flight ,I had an ounce of the stinkiest weed ever down my pants, I had wrapped it in a couple of freezer bags and taped it up half an hour into the flight I had to piss and when I unzipped the inside of the zipper tore the freezer bag open,now I tried to make a quick fix with the tape but when I went back to my seat I realized the whole cabin of this plane could smell the dope ,it was so strong I could hear everyone talking about it and passengers complaining to hostess's about the smell, it really was that bad, All I could think was there is going to be cops waiting at the airport and lucky I only had hand luggage as there was a bunch of cops near the bag belts, lucky it was busy I sped out straight into a taxi ,he said to me,I think you were suppose to get in the line there was people waiting ,I was ready for that and flicked a fifty dollar note at him and said just drive mate, it was funny because he replied in his Indian accent ,(OK were are we going sir, ), Finally I could relax.

[@ikeivy9580]

Nice..

[@timfredrickson3889]

Bullshit you had a full ounce down your pants

[@tabernaclejones6115]

Good story for the comment section lol this is why I only travel with dabs. Much easier

[@JohnthePixelizedGuy]

Damn dude that’s scary

[@lastmanstanding3739]

Spencer thats not that much?

[@johngamez4619]

TS:Really? JD: Between the cocaine and my attitude I'm dyin.. 😂😂

[@timewatch5]

Like national geographic lmaoo

[@dontmindme333]

Joey’s German accent is gold. Lmfao 😭

[@eddyruiz9014]

Germans love correcting strangers, especially here in Germany. It's a cultural thing though. They just needed a bit of a cultural exchange.

[@williamcutrell7456]

Germans can suck my fucking bratwurst and fuck off

[@JiMuKai]

And there it is, cultural exchange happening in this very thread

[@dustinhargrove2129]

All y’all can fuck right off, caucasians have no culture so it’s not much of an exchange 😂🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

[@dustinhargrove2129]

Foot L Johnson I was joking 😂 im half white & grew up in a white household you’re talking to one of very few hillbilly natives 😂

[@dustinhargrove2129]

Foot L Johnson and. Absolutely no hate over here 😂 Merca.

[@CZRXCZR]

Lee’s laugh is the cherry on top

[@clouter8103]

I cam hardly breathe! Beyonce poster, what a line. Top stuff JD

[@dylanmounsey7515]

Ask Questions Later TREMENDOUS DAWG

[@andyd568]

@Ask Questions Later - I don't get that line at all but I sense that it is funny. What does a poster of Beyonce have to do with anything? Is it a taunt implying the woman in question is hotter? Could you explain ?

[@andyd568]

@@kasper5688 Oh haha, I get it now. I was just confused as to why people were offended. Geez. It's hilarious.

[@whatisthishandlegarbage]

maybe it's because of all the "cam" in your throat.

[@lisetteeliseparis7070]

Right? Hysterical.

[@gregc33487]

'They were hockin each other to death you know however they talk'

[@jb1996BLOP]

"With the fuckin hee-ho or whatever they do the the hand"

[@robbtrudel1993]

I would sacrifice everything I hold dear in life to witness Joey arguing with those Germans in real life

[@jakebooth658]

Tom told an entire Joey Diaz story verbatim from Joey’s memories 😂 that’s impressive

[@crazyjoedavola5430]

"The stewardess was giving me the malook eye" haha

[@robbiel8677]

I love Lees carebear being squeezed laugh.

[@ohnonotjo]

If you squeeze a ball of humus it makes the same sound

[@akutagawaatsushi3105]

@@ohnonotjo Lol what

[@pinkberryconsumer4059]

You know I was going to really give you s*** about your comment but I just can't bring myself to do it only because of your profile pic got to love the ThunderCats

[@sheeshanowify]

the comments saying Joey is racist and a womanizer...come on guys it's clearly in the context of a joke...how about turning off the PC radar, sit back, relax and have a laugh ...

[@fplus6749]

If they don't like...turn if off.

[@Sneak248]

I thought we were safe here from the beta cucks, I guess not :(

[@sheeshanowify]

Betas are everywhere bruh...everywhere I look....I see beta people.

[@stephen8996]

@@Sneak248 never safe

[@howey935]

I know this P.C culture has gone way beyond a joke, we need to go back to like it was in the late 70s early 80s

[@Szaam]

There's something incredibly satisfying about hearing Uncle Joey say "who the fuck do you think you're talking to?"

[@0u73rh34v3n]

“Hssssssss he’s got ya there” OMFG LOOOOOL good god I haven’t laughed that hard in years

[@tannerbarkley4629]

"Your little Hitler buddy" best quote ever😂

[@6luealreadydead]

In all honesty these stories of actually somewhat restored my faith that there are some regular cops that are still good people out there

[@thetraveler1182]

Plenty of them are regular people trust me on that.

[@flint-cut-stunner9196]

Fonzie so you just assume ALL cops are assholes? i bet your instinct is Always right😂 dumber than bird shit i swear

[@sfwisdom6673]

Lol this only worked because it was Joey bro

[@trenyte6763]

Uhh if you actually believe any of joeys story’s you must be on the spectrum . He’s entertaining but 90% of his story’s are just that. Storys and he makes most of it up as he goes

[@rupin]

Shane Knerr damn you just made up the story of that guys life!

[@rustyshackelford3718]

His diaz impression is utter gold.

[@yogidemis8513]

Joey "The most interesting criminal in the world" Diaz

[@jp-lw5gl]

Lol

[@RoronoaZoro-yq3qj]

Joey "I'm rippin down the Beyonce poster" Diaz

[@charlielambert9713]

Roronoa "Definitely watches Joe Rogan" Zoro

[@RoronoaZoro-yq3qj]

@@charlielambert9713 well you ain't wrong

[@chrisw5150]

I don't get it

[@wullaballoo2642]

@@chrisw5150 Neither do I. Rihanna much more pretty lady.

[@imaginedauthority9455]

Can't believe I only just found this I love Joey's stories. no sleep for me!

[@georgeclinton4524]

"You're 'missing' right now." What a great fucking line. I'm definitely stealing that.

[@wicked5312]

Lee laughing Makes it 50× more funny😂

[@TheMrlitemaster]

"you and your hitler buddy!" ROFFFFFFFFFL

[@ernielarkin4793]

If I'm sitting next to Joey on a flight.....oh he's talking to me.

[@arielmetamorphosis]

“Turn the phone off” 😂😂😂 that shit gets me every time

[@kramegame8442]

Joey had me dying @ 7:00 talkin about the German guys on the plane😂😂😂

[@lukethompson8137]

The accent was unexpected ahaha

[@domshefwood3460]

Next time somebody asks me if I've heard the good news: "There's a God... I don't know if he sent his son to kill Jesus, or whateva."

[@kimbonice]

I've seen that happen before with people telling others to turn their phone off even in 2019 with planes having Wi-Fi now. Totally ridiculous to chastise another adult as if they're a child. I usually ignore them when they're trying to play "hallway monitor" or troll them until they escalate then they get kicked out or put in their place once they realize they have no power.

[@jaedo71]

Joey and Lee are two people you could literally listen to all day 😂

[@jacuxharakuta5923]

All time best story teller 👊🏽 😂

[@rickybaillie4222]

This is all well and good but don't forget that in 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem... if no one else can help... and if you can find them... maybe you can hire... The A-Team.

[@ramsy4205]

@johnny walker fuck you

[@elcuntogomez5716]

@johnny walker exactly wat i thought

[@elcuntogomez5716]

And fuk u crack head wat has that got to do with shit

[@joeyv.destefano5236]

Duh duh duh duh, dun dun dun. Duh duh dun dun. Dah du dun dun dun.. Still the best theme song to a show ever.

[@paul-egz4264]

None of you bitches waited quietly with your brothers n dad at 7:59pm for that opening to start, if anyone missed it you were crushed for a whole week, my dad went out and bought a small black n white so he could watch the live pick 3, 4 and 6 on channel 8 at 7:59pm while sitting on the corner of the couch waiting for the beginning of the A-TEAM... and being a decorated Sergeant in the Army for 2 tours in Vietnam he fuckin lived vicariously through the A-TEAM because he definitely wasn't happy with his career as a gym teacher and football and wrestling coach, he'd much rather be the 5th member of colonel John Hannibal Smiths team

[@Red_AIert]

I fuckin love Joey Diaz. Ain't too many people that can have you in tears laughing like a little kid while just telling a story. 😂🙏🏼

[@speak-easyconversations1393]

Lee sounds like a legit baby when laughing it’s infectious

[@danielcasalinovo9660]

"You're missing right now" LOL

[@carrrexx7190]

The away team 😂classic

[@Baci302]

"When I get home I'm ripping down the Beyonce' poster!" LMAO.

[@Patrick.Weightman]

He's right though, if a cop confronts you about smoking, just be straight up. Unless you live in NYC or something 99% of the time they'll cut you some slack - some dude smoking a one gram joint before a flight just isn't worth their time.

[@justinlawlor3898]

You are tripping, you always lie, i use to be a cop, they ask questions so they can arrest you, never admit anything, never ever admit a crime

[@alexacosta2140]

I love how all of Joey’s friends can impersonate him

[@Christian-qu5ye]

I needed this after a long day. Thanks uncle Joey

[@spencermeunier3298]

Okay first of all, that guys Diaz impression was damn good

[@catfishchris1]

Spencer Meunier “that guy”

[@loganbrannigan]

7:28 When you are at a movie theater and the person next to you has their cellphone out during the movie.

[@jaketnk9957]

Lee's laugh at 12:10

[@antoniolosciuto7548]

I would love to dowload his laugh

[@TehUltimateSnake]

That shit had me dying the whole time lmao

[@boogieman468]

Lol Joey trying to fight would be the funniest thing I would ever see he would blow him self out in 3 mins

[@gregorrose8935]

That “national geographic women” line gets me every damn time🤣🤣

[@moreofjosem5363]

“He’s got you there!”

[@Nxghtmxre999]

“Sir, turnnnn zerrrr phone off!” *German accent LMFAOOOO

[@Pt0wN973b0iI]

THAT IS A FRIEND FOR YOU! REMEMBERING WHAT YOU TELL THEM!

[@DragonAurora]

Ol' dude's giggle is something else...

[@MR4_11]

I’m in the library right now and that German story made me embarrass myself. I can’t stop laughing

[@Psycho-Complex]

"Your fuckin Hitler buddy" I'm dyin

[@Preacher_.]

7:04 😂😂 This is why we fuckin' love Joey Diaz! 👏👏

[@dancarter255]

Joey diaz's laugh is contagious 😁

[@powface]

"Your the away team!"...holy fuck 🤣🤣🤣

[@myearshurtnoone1367]

gonna rip down the beyonce poster? is basically saying i dont need that poster anymore after seeing you?

[@ToSobrietyAndBeyond]

Jim McCracken they were asking a question. For someone to clarify it for the fuck nuts.

[@liam10123]

Nah this might be my favourite joey Diaz story real or fake it’s ducking hilarious 😂

[@LucaBakiMMA]

Love from Germany ♥️😁

[@JakeFlemingVlogs]

Coming back to this video a year later because it’s the best

[@jonathonbooher3811]

Joey be dropping 265 lbs bombs

[@Maicon-b1b]

04:40😂😂😂 I barely caught the joke about bananas😂😂😂

[@nedtheproducer5777]

0:42 spot on joey diaz “dowag”

[@rodgerhall109]

uncle joey is the funniest man alive i love me some uncle joey

[@VodkaSoda]

11:40 Joey with his Miami Vice episode story lol

[@mikephillips8538]

Sparking it up anywhere that's my dawg ! San Antonio Texas steppin thru high fiving Bergen New Jersey !

[@Goose21995]

Im so using that “rip beyonce off the wall” line. I love black girls.

[@surfingtothestars]

@El Matadores it means that you like black girls and you're now replacing them with Beyonce on your wall

[@leonscribbles5615]

Same bro 😂💀

[@DumbDare]

@@surfingtothestars Wouldnt it be youre now replacing Beyonce with them?

[@audriiiiroberts3030]

Suirason Coruscant dude had it alllll wrong lol fuck

[@LucaBakiMMA]

@@DarkestCheese41 ok boomer

[@selectacharacterfilms]

"Turn da fone off" 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

[@CarpeNoctem135]

He gets into arguments. I always get life stories from old women. I had one lady talk for a whole 2 hour flight. Hope you’re doing well Bernadette.

[@NickyDekker89]

You forgot to tell her to shut the fuck up and that you're not interested in her son's life stories next time. That's where you went wrong.

[@hatednyc]

"... Ah-HAAAACHing each Otha ta Death!" Joey D... Fucking *LEGEND*

[@jwoolfe1445]

"You're missing right now." holy moly!

[@infinitypoker6383]

I love Joey with all my heart

[@6luealreadydead]

That story about the second time he saw dude though is exactly why I love watching Joey!

[@alfiii7210]

Joey and Mike are the perfect elements for a great podcast

[@UltraViolence74989]

the malook eye lol. Rip down the Beyonce poster...classic. Joey "panty dropper' Diaz.

[@TheIronWristFighters]

@Foot L Johnson if you Google the locations and time periods he talks about most them are accurate. Even if they aren't hes still HAVING FUN. Might wanna try it sometime

[@justcuz3324]

@@TheIronWristFighters why do you take time out of your day to research this man's story

[@TheIronWristFighters]

@@justcuz3324 he looked up his highschool pics on JRE. Enough research for me

[@oreomanscookiesmilk7132]

@Foot L Johnson You literally have no idea what is or isnt true, so you saying its fake is just as believable as joey's stories.

[@oreomanscookiesmilk7132]

@Foot L Johnson Lmao all you're doing is saying the same thing, just bealcause you think you are a human lie detector doesnt mean you are. growing up in a certain area wont let you sniff out everyones bullshit, id be willing to bet money that i can lie and you would have no idea and you know why? because you dont fucking know me or joe so how do you know every story he tells is fake, you're also acting like your opinion is fact. You arent a psychologist so you actually have no say in what you think you know what someone is saying.

[@davidvaughn9]

Joey Diaz is a national treasure

[@jakesharp5510]

How TF is Joey Diaz not on a no fly list lmao

[@dannylazic1392]

I lost it when he said turn de phone off🤣🤣