Why are so many autistic adults undiagnosed? | Kip Chow | TEDxSFU

[@DresdenDoll79]

I LOVE that they analogize autism as simply running a different OS as opposed to being broken or deficient. I've used this analogy for years to help people better understand what autism is actually like. Never have had a problem with anyone understanding when I frame it that way.

[@tanjacristina7913]

I use the same analogy and it gets through to most people. Its even useful for ADHD albeit a little differently as I use the 20 thousand tabs open and some are playing annoying songs on repeat and that's why I'm distracted.. Another one I've stumbled across that works in my case is for ASD overload and/or meltdowns. I compare it to having too many things running on you laptop at the same time making it so slow it will either freeze (overload shutdown) or BSOD (meltdown)

[@mathelogical2563]

Very true.

[@reginamushi6582]

@@tanjacristina7913 my sone is on Spectrum and has ASD ..I have no knowledge of any of this..am having to research now .. He is only 4yrs newly diagnosed

[@SadisticSenpai61]

I think his analogy was a little backwards. NTs are iPhones and NDs are Androids. All androids are different with slightly different variations on the OS, but it's the same basic idea when it comes to navigation and android users can eventually find their way around someone else's phone. Give us an iPhone tho? We're completely lost - even the controls are different. Meanwhile, I've know plenty of iPhone users that never struggle to use a friend's iPhone - they can go straight to whatever app they were looking for with only minimal commentary about how they organize their folders differently or something along those lines. And no, Green Mamba Games, NTs don't have malware, nor are they "primitive, animalistic, and barely functional." It's just a different OS. That's all.

[@Jessica-sp6rt]

Thanks for the analogy, I'll will definitely use it in the future.

[@sinthiafs]

I had a relationship with an autistic person but he was diagnosed only after three years we were together and the reason he seeked medical help was depression. He was the most surprised one, but many things started making sense.He's doing super fine now.

[@alenaduplantier4505]

You also migth have autism if it takes long for you to notice😅😅

[@MomoSimone22]

I just had an assessment for ADHD today and was told that it sounds like I also have autism haha. It's definitely surprising!

[@thomasparg1981]

I am in the exact same situation at 40 years old. Going through depression lately and starting to realize I have Asberger/autism after digging into the characteristics. My all life up to this point is starting to make sense slowly.

[@abeeral-hussein7082]

After 20 year marriage, be struggling with my life , one of my husband family said that he autistic. Even I was sure there is something wrong with him . But th his information put me down and low like I fall from the ske to the earth

[@jejelaurent9495]

How do you get test it.

[@queensittingduck]

I'm mourning my life I could have had. I'm so angry. If I even mention autism, someone with a "real" autistic family member will shut me all the way down. I have been masking my whole life. I have such a hard time with social interactions. It's just like you said, for years I have been encouraged to just change and then I will be accepted, but its a lie, they still don't accept me and I damn near have no idea who I really am at this point. Thank you for this talk. I am a brown woman with ancestors from the African continent. They refuse to allow me any accomodations so I can also function, it's always you have to do it the way everyone else does it or you are wrong and invalid. I hate being forced to conform so much. It has caused me so much depression. Thank you again!

[@heedmydemands]

That is so unfair. I hope you are doing okay

[@queensittingduck]

@heedmydemands I'm doing better but it's a long road. Your sympathy helps a lot. Thank you for your support.

[@juliadixon8465]

Check out some of the autistic women's subreddits. I'm not a POC, but would love to communicate with you and other newly diagnosed adults who are also mourning the lives we might have had.

[@queensittingduck]

@@juliadixon8465 do you have one specific?

[@shazzorama]

It sounds like an exclusive country club, when you put it that way.

[@mamique]

This was wonderful. As a woman in my 40s who only recently realized that I might be autistic, I appreciate your efforts to bring awareness to the lack of diagnostic tools available for adults.

[@modeus9592]

It’s a shame. Most articles, and therapist are available for early developing children. Not so much adults. Finding information useful for adults has been rather hard to.

[@kaseyboles30]

There is still too much of the old school thinking of autism being young males only. I've talked to quite a few women in the autistic groups on facebook who got multiple wrong dx's with resulting poor outcomes before finally getting the right dx. It's changing, just not fast enough imho.

[@rosealexander9007]

I’m in my 40’s and I recently realized that I might be autistic

[@radar_radar]

I’m almost 45 too mate and thinking this explains a lot 😆

[@drmatarkin2100]

I’m turning 40 this year and I have only just been diagnosed. There’s hardly anything for us!

[@angelagehrkecsw6815]

Fantastic Talk! I am a therapist and have many adults that come to see me for depression/anxiety and OCD symptoms or ADHD symptoms and after a few minutes of interaction, I pick up on some patterns and ask "have you ever considered that you might have traits on the autism spectrum?" Most of the time, these clients will reply yes and that they have spoken to others but have been told that they can't be autistic because they don't look like so-and-so who is autistic. I find that female clients are especially dismissed with their own questions about autism because they have friends and might not be good at math. I am thankful for your words and perspective in this talk and will share it with my clients and colleagues.

[@ooulalah4333]

You're describing me diagnosed with: chronic depression, anxiety, ocd, ptsd, panic attacks..even BPD at one point. I learned of HSP and that was the door opening to learning about autism. I wish I'd been diagnosed very young instead of pressured to act so against my natural self. I knew I wasn't thriving having to act like I was "normal" all the time. It ruined my childhood. How does one get a proper diagnosis?

[@stephanie3848]

That is wonderful. There needs to be more therapists like you. I went to literally 11 different therapists and none of them even thought about autism. Thank you for your knowledge about autism.

[@stephanie3848]

It's frustrating how so many people say "you don't look autistic" as if they are stuck on a stereotype

[@heedmydemands]

I know u weren't trying to say that women aren't good at math but hey I am good at math

[@Lotusblume.8]

@@ooulalah4333 same here!

[@cheetocairo]

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD. I have Kaiser insurance here in America. The process was simple. I called the psychiatry department, they gave me an appointment for two weeks later, I met with the psychiatrist for an hour and that was that. A few weeks later, I was thinking about ASD and it connected a lot of dots for me. I watched videos of people who have both ADHD and ASD and it made my life make sense. So, I called the psychiatry department back thinking it would be the same simple process. However, I was instead met with confusion and questions. "An autism assessment? Oh, we don't really do that. You weren't diagnosed as a child? Why do you want this? Ok, well, we will leave a note for the psychiatrist.". I have no idea why there was such resistance for them to schedule another visit for me to meet with the psychiatrist 🤷‍♀️.

[@ryandonnelly2661]

Any update? I have two professors this semester who one: is a neuroscientist and the other being a psychologist who also is grounded in Autism research at our R1 university. I have ADHD and am wondering if I have Autism, excited to schedule a meeting with them to talk about this some more. Hope all is well

[@cheetocairo]

@@ryandonnelly2661 I was able to get another appointment with a psychiatrist and get formally diagnosed with autism :) It has really helped to understand myself and how I experience being in the world. And it has eliminated the frustration of constantly being told I'm just depressed and just need antidepressants.

[@QuailCanyonAnthropolgy]

They did not want to handle it because autism is not a disorder, their system is a disorder. Their disorder can be framed in and defined, but autism is not framed in and defined. Autism is a trait of evolution, and has a broad spectrum, just as all other personality traits. Imagine the disorderly telling someone what disorder someone else has. Meditate and get back in tune with nature and perfection will be yours. Don't let the disorderlies tell you what you are or are not. Tell the universe what you are. Know what you are! Love what you are.

[@Lit123ful]

I would keep trying. Problem is tho, they will just drug you instead of giving you tools to help you cope with the O.C.D and other issues that make it hard to cope in a “normal” world.

[@nitefox4411]

LOOKOUT!!! YOU fell for the click bait of this video. Kaiser policy IS as follows. Autism is a disorder in the DSM manual and it IS. It is medical neurology first, not an identity. I needed services fast after multiple support deaths. Limited insight into autistic identity is limited insight into their own deficits. I did NOT celebrate my autism diagnosis by neuro psyche because autism comes with a load of life long since I was a tot issues. Nobody has been going out of their way to provide service support help to me even Autism Speaks. Autism is NOT an "oh, now I think I have autism" its my new identity. You must have solid proof this was there before 18 and even if you do, kaiser policy snakes back around to the ONLY department in Kaiser who will diagnose is neuro psychology and they only see children under 18. If you have lots of cash and family willing to verify you have a chance. Good luck.

[@mathilda6763]

I like this talk. It's well-structured, informative and the speech is slow enough and clear which makes it easier to understand for people that are not native speakers.

[@jesskegley1055]

Is no one gonna mention how they said "thank you for coming to my TED Talk" and then winked? A cute ending to an accessible, informative talk.

[@hyperfocus1963]

Yes, the cherry on top!

[@AnthaKharana]

I like the pronounce - They

[@kipperkell]

Lmao I'm so glad someone else caught that. I love their humour.

[@MariaNI-yf1bz]

They? Lol

[@Mrivuyu]

Him.

[@ez209]

I was 51 when I was diagnosed. Two sth. months ago. I agree with you: a lifelong feeling out of place and misunderstood, listening to people call you all sort of things and not understanding why.

[@waldosmyth8110]

Same here. I only found out because somebody "insulted" me with "you and your f*ing Asperger's" and I checked what that is...

[@hugomontoya8587]

Others calling you things like what?

[@Edavmmae]

I'm 51 and just going through some tests..I'm high on the adhd tests...I'm astounded I've made it this far and no one knew, I keep saying I'm different and now I know why :)

[@joeldouglas1985]

Sounds like my life story

[@dianeibsen5994]

Hi. Can I ask you is it really that expensive to get diagnosed? I really earlier, but it was quite expensive that's why I asked. I have Medicaid insurance. I was diagnosed as a kid is add or ADHD I'm not sure what the differences?

[@juliazalewski3023]

I’m 51. Only just realized I’m on the spectrum. I’ve been asking for help all my life. No one has ever listened. I’m just “weird “ or “too sensitive.” Well, as it turns out, both of those things are true. But now I have an answer as to why and it’s made all the difference. Imagine living your whole life like a puzzle with big pieces missing. Now I have those pieces and my life makes sense to me. I’m lucky. I happened upon the right information at the right time. I easily could have spent the rest of my life in silent fear and pain.

[@matthollywood8060]

Very happy for you. For me, having the realization at 49 felt like the world finally turned right side up for the first time in my life.

[@Teasy_32]

same (including the age) here - all the best to us!

[@isaocampo332]

My oldest daughter is 19 years old and she was recently diagnosed with autism. She always felt like there was something wrong with her 😢. I send lots of compassion for all the people in the world with autism. .

[@sisfantasto7004]

My own mother couldn't accept me being different and told me no one could love me the way I was. I have been in hiding and masking myself for 46 years. Music was/is the only place I feel safe. Autism is also about acceptance/tolerance of diversity. You have diversity everywhere, why can't you ( as society) accept diversity in human personalities? I am done with masking and hiding now. I am done with keeping my mouth /emotions shut down in order to keep everyone else comfortable. This Earth has room for everyone no matter what you think, feel or look like.

[@alenaduplantier4505]

What a horrible mother you have

[@sisfantasto7004]

Alena: indeed. Thank God I could start a new life.

[@alenaduplantier4505]

Glad to hear your Having a better life

[@stephanie3848]

Hug

[@menosproblemos6993]

15:36 I love your playful body language. For example when you say "Are you ready?" you have such a friendly, energetic bounce in your body, and combined with your gentle voice I feel all NICE inside.^^ I bet children often like you 😄

[@Darwaxion]

I am 27, I live in Turkey and I haven’t been diagnosed. But I do believe that I have autism because wherever I have been I had very bad, terrible social relationships, even since the elementary school. I have almost always been bullied or alienated. My parents either refused to see and ignored or were not able relate my situation to autism. Now I realize that I might be autistic. I need help to be diagnosed…. Psychiatrists in Turkey do it only for the children.

[@stephanie3848]

Hug

[@ashleylala4293]

My partner and many of her family members are on the spectrum. I must say, the way our medical system in the US is handling autism, or should I say not handling it is a travesty. We seem to only be fixated on the psychological aspect but there are some very serious medical aspects that need to be addressed. I took my partner to a functional MD in Taiwan who specializes in Autism. The gut dysbiosis, chemical toxicities, food intolerances, etc which are rampant in autistic individuals are basically being ignored in America. These are serious issues that can greatly contribute to anxiety and other serious medical problems. Proper treatment from well informed healthcare providers has helped my partner tremendously. I wish more autistic people could have access to Functional medicine because the antiquated allopathic model is pretty much useless. We really need to start demanding better healthcare because America is really falling behind in so many ways.

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

I’m a person with ASD-1 and I work in a hospital, yet they can’t a therapist who knows anything about adults on the spectrum and they refuse to help. I just wanted to work with someone who had experience since I’ve had it my whole life and have been damaged by not being diagnosed. They took it personally and now refuse to help me. Hospitals in the US cater to rich residents, whereas everywhere else caters to patients.

[@treelo11]

Do you have resources about the medical issues for autistic individuals? I just got diagnosed and have battled multiple food intolerances in my life.

[@innocentnemesis3519]

@Treelo I don’t know if there are as many references so much as there is a large number of anecdotal experiences. Including with myself - no one believes my autism diagnosis, or recognises the vague physical symptoms and gut problems I deal with, let alone connects the two.

[@treelo11]

​@@innocentnemesis3519 I feel that. I came across a study that found women on the spectrum have higher levels of androgen, which is also linked to conditions like premenstrual dysphoric disorder, androgenetic alopecia etc. which have a huge effect on the quality of life. If you have several co-morbidities and life keeps throwing you lemons, then you will naturally try do your own research to find the linkages and the root cause. But how many autistic women are able to become doctors/researchers/scientists or have breakthroughs on such topics only to have their research dismissed at work, I wonder.

[@liesdamnlies3372]

The US (not America; Canadians and Mexicans really do get annoyed by being thrown-in with them constantly) needs to get it together with a functioning healthcare system in the first place. ‘Cause they don’t have one.

[@sitedev]

Exactly right - inherently different but never less. A square peg in a round hole.

[@landmineremover5676]

I'm 43 and made an appt today

[@7Nebulae7]

That is what I have felt as long as I can remember! I've tried to fit in but it has been difficult, almost impossible. And the consequences of forcing that square peg in the round hole have been really hard on me. I don't have any doubts as to why so many autistic people suffer from anxiety and depression. Living your life feeling that you are somehow wrong as a human being is destructive to say the least.

[@lunareluna]

it's amazing to hear actually autistic people talk about autism and their personal experiences! thank you

[@josheyyoshi8277]

The fact that it costs so much to get tested for autism is what's stopping me from getting a diagnosis as a 26 year old. I have a suspicion that I might be autistic because of the behaviours and thought patterns I exhibit but its always met with a comment like "you don't need to get tested because you function just fine and we're all on the spectrum." The fact that these barriers exist is what stops so many potentially autistic adults receive a diagnosis.

[@Screamingforfood]

I am in this situation at the moment. I see it’s been months since you commented this did you end up getting a diagnosis?

[@marisa5359]

That's me too. And I have two children diagnosed. Makes no sense to me.

[@stephanie3848]

Try the office of vocational rehabilitation in your state. Maybe they can pay for the testing so you can get diagnosed. Good luck 🙂

[@RangelGabriel]

I can relate. Recently I've been looking back at my behavior as a youngster and now at adulthood. I may be in the spectrum, but everything related to mental health is expensive here in Brazil and I can't afford going anywhere else to get a proper diagnosis.

[@BillieGote]

I'm so sorry that you've been dismissed like that. The comments by people saying you don't need a diagnosis, you function just fine, anger me. What makes them so sure that they can know how easy or difficult it is for someone to function, just by what they happen to see and how they choose to interpret that. How dare they presume to know what someone else might need. As far as that uninformed platitude that everyone is somewhere on the spectrum, society needs to stop perpetuating that notion. Autism is a separate neurotype that naturally occurs in humans (and maybe in other animals too, who knows). There can be more than one neurotype, and still have some overlaps in behaviors between different neurotypes. That does not mean that the underlying thought processes for those individuals will necessarily be the same. When the DSM-5 criteria finally can reflect the internal lived experience of autistics, we will be much closer to recognizing who is or is not on the autism spectrum. Up to this point in history, all the diagnostic criteria is based on obvious observed behaviors and that means there is so much that gets missed.

[@liliquoy]

I love how he got deep into and really gave examples.

[@daisyfruity3040]

I thought I was just depressed then found out I might be autistic accidentally. Now I can’t shake it off, I keep researching because I just resonate with most experiences

[@claudiacoonmosby]

Thank you, Kip. I was assessed and diagnosed last fall at age 57. Your talk was illuminating. Much gratitude & best wishes to you!

[@batbarasobczak351]

What medications do you need to take for your mental illness? Just curious.

[@lexiconlover]

He managed to sum up my whole childhood as well as my "silent years" followed by the last decade of me finally speaking up while also being told to "let it go". I see a need to keep how you've been treated to yourself but I'm also glad I kept looking for asnswers because it led me here.

[@crafteariee]

from a 20-something Asian lady who only got their ASD diagnosis this year, thank you so much for this very clearly explained talk! It was only upon getting my diagnosis that I began to piece together the unique circumstances and challenges I’ve been facing in my life even from childhood in order to develop better habits to work with the difficulties this “different OS” brings once everything fell into place. Took a while to get screened and get the diagnosis confirmed by good psychiatrist but I am fortunate to be living in a main metropolitan area in this country with easier access to these resources as I’m unfortunately aware of how difficult access to mental health resources can be, especially in more remote/ rural areas of my country. I hope that there can be better resources out there to help many autistic folks under the radar get the help they need!

[@brandonferrell5480]

Great Talk, Kip. Learning now at 44 that I'm autistic has been a massive unlocking of understanding within myself and how I interact with the world.

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

I was diagnosed two years ago (female who has always had the classic symptoms except I’m not male), but still don’t have access to therapists who know anything about it. I guess it’s not taught in psychology classes or psychiatry which is weird since we have such a high suicide rate. They know how to diagnose, but not how to help you. I honestly think they need to start teaching neurotypicals empathy not people different from them. That’s my biggest challenge. I going the full distance out of MY way and they won’t even meet me a quarter of the way.

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

I even passed out from bad audio sounds on a classroom (multiple times). I stared at the floor when I was very young if I didn’t know someone. I was called “shy” and later made fun of for my entire childhood . . . Which actually continued into adulthood. I just realized most human were mean and cruel and had PTSD, depression, and anxiety from how people treated me. I still don’t trust most neurotypicals. I see them as the ones with no empathy or very little. After finally meeting others on the spectrum, I enjoy their company and find them to be the most caring people.

[@lenagranstrom579]

@@JDMimeTHEFIRST same

[@Blackafternoon]

@@JDMimeTHEFIRST God brought us here to heal the muggles.

[@bennyton2560]

As a fellow autistic Chinese, you have my maximum respect! Might I also add, despite Kip here appearing as awkward or despite his monotone delivery, you can clearly see the eloquence and logical nature behind the initial "weirdness"; and after a while, he becomes endearing, for his intelligence and humour! This is how it's like when you get to know an autistic person. We really are just a spicy flavour of human beings

[@ooulalah4333]

That's sweet. I found him endearing immediately.

[@knotsoangelic]

When he asked if anyone in the room thought he looked autistic, or if he seemed autistic, i went yes only bc i also am, and i got the vibes from him lmao. (I’m also a trans man so hearing the diversity line makes me feel better)

[@knotsoangelic]

@@doremirse9950 what does “and for a good reason” mean there?

[@knotsoangelic]

@PRISTINE JOEL Idk if you’re a boy or not but you can’t cure autism. Go away

[@heedmydemands]

@@ooulalah4333 me too

[@BossQueen1]

What’s sad is my sons step mom had to tell me that she thinks I have autism. And that I need to get diagnosed and she’s a autism teacher. I’m blessed that God sent her to me! Being misdiagnosed is a path that will lead to failure. I know this and I’m 29.

[@kikib859]

Okay sis but watch out for those family dynamics and get some other people on your team that aren’t just your ex and his new boo. I was a behavioral therapist for autistic children but we still couldn’t diagnose, so I find it wildly inappropriate that she would use her position of access to autism as power to diagnose others with it. Hope you come back for an update!

[@rubycubez1103]

I'm 41. I was just diagnosed with ADHD and ASD a few days ago...talk about having an aha moment. I was in and out of therapy for over 20 yrs misdiagnosed with depression, anxiety and bipolar II and given medication that never worked.

[@madshorn5826]

Dr Hallowell's book "Answers to distraction" may be helpful with getting to grips with the ADHD. Russel Barkley has great talks here on KZbin, but his book is less well written imho. I love his concept of "prosthetic environment" though: the idea that as an ADHDer you need physical reminders in your environment in addition to alarms, calendars, journals and reminders. "Puzzle alarms" are apps that does a great job of slowly pulling you out of flow. Having to focus briefly on something else makes stopping relevant enough to be acted on. Keeping track of your day may help motivate you to get stuff done if you don't like to break streaks :-)

[@freetrialagain379]

Man I’m 22 and going thru the same. Help me. Tell me what medication you’ve got now

[@freetrialagain379]

I wanna start living before my life is over

[@NickUncommon]

@@freetrialagain379 sorry, there is no medication to treat Autism. Just awareness, what is bothering you and learning good, healthy coping strategies. For example, wearing noise cancelling headphones, when you know, the city noise is overpowering your senses. Or removing the tags in clothing, if your skin is getting itchy from them or avoiding certain foods, if they are sensory unbearable. Each person needs to find 5heir own triggers, and learn how to deal with them. A psychologist with emotive behavioural education might help finding out about what works and how to learn the coping skills.

[@kaseyboles30]

Bi-Polar is one of the most common miss-diagnosis for autistics, especially women. Borderline personality disorder is probably second most common.

[@animaniacgurl]

Amazing presentation and breakdown explanation for neurotypicals who may not understand what “autism” means. Every brain is wired differently and not every individual is alike. We all experience the world differently. I loved your talk so much I am sharing it with all of my coworkers. As a pediatric OT that works with the autism population, it is important that we educate ourselves and do what is best for the child, not what society deems is “normal.”

[@cecilyerker]

Thanks for what you do Taylor, we all need to help one another

[@yararinamiil]

what is best for the person**

[@cocolinabt]

I‘d like to know how a neurotypical persons brain works

[@bennyton2560]

@@cocolinabt *gotta follow social norms or brain goes blurrr* (joking obv)

[@myabolds]

WORD

[@aliciabyul9550]

I feel better listening to him. I don't like having room mates who are loud. They aren't comfortable to be with. I just like the silence and walking out side at night because it isn't bright.

[@heyasasha]

I wish everyone could see this. Commenting to boost your chances with the algorithm.

[@betsywoolbright8059]

@@ts757arse lol so true

[@juv3ydvs3vb3vst7]

Wat

[@CitrasFlava]

Great point as the idea of what autism is to people who dont know it is purely built from stereotypes, even the people who have it and dont know it.

[@flxmkr]

I discovered long ago that people who appeared different from “the norm” seemed to flock toward me. I never shunned them, and really didn’t see anything “wrong” with them, except they were different from “the norm”. I even taught a special Ed Sunday school class and felt completely comfortable with them as opposed to teaching neurotypicals. Then my daughter told me she was on the spectrum. I went online to prove her wrong. Looked up the signs and symptoms and suddenly realized, “Oh my gosh! I’m autistic!” NIH diagnosed me with anxiety, bipolar, depression, and OCD…but back then, girls didn’t get autism. Makes me wonder if it wouldn’t be simpler to diagnose people by placing them with two different groups: 1) diagnosed autism and 2) diagnosed neurotypical. Then ask one question: What group makes you feel most comfortable?

[@sunburntsatan6475]

Awesome content. I've had my own soul-searching to do because I've found that my presentation differs from typical presentations of autism, leading me to question my validity. The signs point to a strong yes, though there's of course still questions.

[@ejwyatt1285]

I was using the operating system metaphor for over 15 years before I worked it out

[@22neohenry]

Same. Studied computer science and electronics. Unshielded wiring, alternate OS, no hardware/firmware upgrades, many executables not compatible, no ports to connect to other devices, broken sensors etc. Low battery capacity.

[@alenaduplantier4505]

Hahahaha methaphor

[@alicias4311]

Autistic med student here. Putting this ted talk in my presentation about autism. Great speech!! Encapsulates everything I want to convey.

[@jackd.rifter3299]

Most times I'm confused for being an addict or a thief or "sketchy" in public.

[@shoachiwarrior]

As a 44 year old woman with an autistic child & another child with learning challenges. I work with autistic children & an told that I have a "gift" working with these children. I was told by someone working with my autistic child that they believed that I was autistic/ at least on the spectrum. The more time passes the more I believe this, but there isn't away to be diagnosed. What good would this do for me? It would explain a lot for me, but when I try to tell people that this is how I feel, no one believe me or they think I'm looking for attention. It's so frustrating. You know something is "wrong" & yet no one believes you because you're not a kid.

[@thesobrietyplaybook]

I was 41 when I was diagnosed and none of my friends believed me. I have been masking for 41 years 🤦🏻‍♀️ ‼️ I barely starting to get to know myself. It’s exhausting putting up a front. Anyway, it was a wonderful presentation and I resonated with everything he said 🙏

[@ShinySilverBunny]

The indignity of not being believed, especially by friends and family is utterly painful 💔 😢 I hope you left those friends.

[@bennyton2560]

you deserve better friends. many NT people just don't know what autism is and refuse to learn

[@soundhorn7917]

The same is true for ADHD. Funny how non-autistic people decided that it was more appropriate to use the language "person with autism" when those who define themselves as Autistic do not agree.

[@kpaxian6044]

Yes. ABSOLUTELY.

[@RynaxAlien]

Schizophrenia is overdiagnozed and antipsychotics overprescribed. I was misdiagnozed and later tests determined I had autism

[@andrearobinson4608]

BRILLIANT and excellent presentation. We've only begun to scratch the surface of something so much deeper and more profound and your talk was a great SPOTLIGHT on something so fundamental to our human wellness. I will def share this with others. THANK YOU

[@ETV-gz8lq]

This is great stuff! I really hope diagnosis covers all types of people in the near future, we have learned so much about Autism in the past few years.

[@ooulalah4333]

This was a breath of fresh air. I'm going to hold on to the perspective that we are unique but not afflicted. Thank you!

[@Steadyrock100]

I'm glad that you've posted this. It makes one take a true assessment of one's life up to this point. I'll never get yesterday back, but knowing one isn't alone and there are people who relate to this situation, the future is waiting for me to live to the fullest.

[@waldosmyth8110]

Thanks, Kip! That opened my eyes some more and I can confirm a lot of your points. I found alcohol as the best soothing method (first it saved my life, then it messed it up) and was diagnosed with addiction, then, when I got treatment Borderline, Depression and Anxiety. I was very good at masking and often wondered why I was so tired and exhausted after a day in the office. At 50 yrs old, I had a life crisis and no idea who I was or what I wanted. After some research, I am convinced that I am autistic, but I cannot get an official diagnosis in Ontario because I am too old. This will be a problem when it comes to workplace accommodation, but at least a lot of things make more sense to me now. I happen to be a white "boy" - it was hard for me and I can imagine how it is even harder if you are a different demographic.

[@sirisongbird]

No diagnosis available here bc of your age? That sounds absurd! Seems discriminatory to me.

[@recoveringsoul755]

Maybe you can find an expert online in another country who could diagnose you, online, with zoom or Skype and emails etc? You'd need to pay them of course, but you would need to travel hopefully. I imagine there are questionnaires and that sort of thing. Some doctors won't do anything unless insurance covers it, they don't even tell you that you can pay yourself or what is available.

[@recoveringsoul755]

Would *NOT need to travel edit

[@ryandonnelly2661]

Because of Age!?! That is the most ridiculous reason I have ever heard. Please reach out to a private practice or reaching out outside of Canada. Wishing you the best brother!

[@nleem3361]

Time for a new psychologist. I'm 43 and recently diagnosed with adhd and my 1st psychologist put me on an antidepressant and told me adhd is something people grow out of. Nope, my Brian is wired differently, I was struggling at work, and I'm not depressed, nor was I at the time and quitetaking the med they gave me almost emidiatly because I didn't like it. I switched doctors, got referred to a different psychologist and was finally able to get tested and the right treatment... Keep going until you find someone who will help.

[@lavendermeadow1381]

Wonderful speaker, wonderful talk!! Thank you for bringing attention to this topic!!

[@jedimasterham2]

I tell my wife that the sensory overload from light and sounds in a Costco as a metal concert in your head. It's really tough to even go in such places. However, they offer a reward (ie. incentive) at the end, so the benefit often outweighs the sensory.

[@markhaus]

Recently got diagnosed and it's so much to comprehend. I'm glad there's so much information I can find on it.

[@jbug884]

I’ve been undiagnosed for 42 years! I’ve learned to mask every symptom, using every trick in the book. I don’t want a label, so won’t ever go for help. I feel I’m too old to change now and, I don’t actually want to change, I’ve learned to live with it. No one knows the real me, not even my parents or husband.

[@taoist32]

At least you are married. I am the only one out of my siblings and cousins to not have a relationship or be married. Been this way all my life and only had a few relationships, but I misread or cannot recognize social cues or signals very well. And I just learned about masking. I mask too well.

[@quorincollins9965]

This was amazing . Very spot on accurate!

[@melaniewantsabeer243]

I just found out at age 50 that I have autism. I fell through the cracks for so long. Explains so much.

[@johnjohnson-gv2go]

Watching various videos whilst I wait for my diagnosis. The point of many undiagnosed autistic people experience physical and emotional abuse growing up was a real wall hitter. Ok… so I’m not so unique. All medical professionals should watch this

[@hannah12114]

I’m going to ask my doctor today for a referral to get tested for autism. I’m afraid they say they can’t find a specialist or won’t believe me. I mask a lot, some of it probably has to do with a lot of emotional abuse I went through. My dad has a bad temper so I hide away what I feel. I have was in special education so I’m hoping it points them to the right direction.

[@georgie3590]

I am 29 and no one would ever know I have autism because I do the masking like he mentions. I’m very aware when to mask and when I can truly be myself depending on the situation and people I’m with.

[@mitanshiKnows]

How you do that?? Were you able to do masking in school days also??

[@ZC-xs4zl]

Many of us now in 50’s and 60’s, and older, were indeed diagnosed in childhood in the 40’s, 50’s, 60’s-/ as myself, in the 60’s with what later became known as aspergers. It was a different world and there wasn’t much but shame and punishment, stigma, separation, and extreme discrimination. So we did the obvious to survive-- mask, live isolated, bury ourselves in education, projects, employment in which not much social interaction is required. Many of us became successful but we grew to insist on being alone in order to not be further abused.

[@TheEarthStars]

Great video. Very educational. I'm in my 40s, and the masking thing makes sense. I had a serious life crash in 2020 and was forced to get help. It's come up recently that I might be on the spectrum. This video was very helpful in understanding that many children go undiagnosed, which then become adults with autism. I've looked into testing, but it's well over 6 months out at one clinic that takes new patients, and at the other clinic I'm currently getting help through, you basically have to call every day to see if any of the practitioners opened their schedules up to do testing and then hope you can jump into that appointment.

[@yvonnebrannigan2148]

As I listened the pennies kept falling into place. I have been “masking” and conforming all my life. I think I messed up my role as a parent because I didn’t understand.

[@birdiecahill6929]

Holy moly, me too. I also didn't understand the nature of my marriage until I got out and away...and therapy. What a mess.😔

[@account5858]

If only my mom would actually recognize this it would be such a relief. Congrats 👏👏

[@spellboundty]

I like he starts with "I'm autistic. Could you tell? Probably not." Idk about everyone else but I could immediately.

[@hazelcornell4311]

I thought that, as well. Not necessarily autistic, but certainly neurodivergent in some way. Something about the body language and the cadence of his speech....

[@seeitsmedcreatively1925]

This is very helpful to me. I'm currently pursuing diagnosis and I've had several misdiagnosis so far but I truly feel autism is accurate.

[@johnrainsman6650]

I have a question. Why do people never elaborate on how autistics are "different"? I've heard SO many people refer to them as that word, or say they think "differently," and yet no one ever defined said word or give examples. Is the vagueness--saying different and not specifying how so--deliberate? Is there a secret that is not to be shared? Does my question make sense?

[@cyrillewis9606]

Wow, this really hits home. Probably the most poignant video I've seen on Autism. Great presentation. 🙏

[@zusammen-musik-und-film]

brilliantly spoken! Thanks for bringing your important words out into the world!

[@noansworld]

My son is autistic and diagnosed since aged of 2.5. You talk so well.... Noan is still struggling on talking. thank you for your information...

[@sylverrain4620]

I think I’m have Asperger syndrome, just too afraid of people labeling. I’ve been able to coped with it all these year. Not sure I actually want a diagnosis… it wouldn’t change anything. I’m me…I like myself ok.

[@empatheticpleasure]

This is such a terrific message, if it weren't for my son and my heart I would have never even thought I'm autistic, let alone done research on anything about it. Turns out heart issues and autism are closely linked. Which makes way more sense now. I wonder how many have transitioned not even aware of the real culprit. Another reference I had, was like trying to unlock my brain with the wrong key. 😊Thank you again!

[@jenncharles619]

One of the best direct and simple discussions on this theme. Excellent.

[@supersyden4381]

Thank you for bringing attention and awareness to this topic. You're a good speaker❤

[@dennymmg]

Thank you Kip for the wonderful talk. Completely agree with you.

[@GoodTarget_]

I tried to seek diagnose. Neurologist looked at me and said "you don't look autistic". Appointment took me 2 minutes.

[@aceofspades3667]

Same dude. Women tend to get diagnosed less cause they mask more or something. Try noting down what symptoms you exhibit and find a shrink willing to give your hypothesis a chance

[@jamesduncan1076]

After a lifetime of adaptation, I finally got a diagnostic clue. I advertently took a long form Baron-Cohen Systemizing Quotient test, and the scoring machine algorithm said I was way over the threshold for ASD. It was said I was in the top 2% or so for high SQ. I was once misdiagnosed for OCD a long time ago. I've always gotten by OK but in retrospect tick a lot of ASD boxes. I don't dwell on it though and won't seek any professional diagnosis since I'm doing fine and am happy. I self-describe as an outlier, but there are lots of outliers around of various stripes so no big deal.

[@nigel7277]

Sacha Baron - Cohen ?

[@jamesduncan1076]

@@nigel7277 Sir Simon Philip Baron-Cohen is a British clinical psychologist and professor of developmental psychopathology at the University of Cambridge. Comedian Sacha Baron-Cohen turns out to be his cousin.

[@TheEmpressIsIn]

one stereotype i've struggled with is 'you're too emotional to be autistic'...

[@veronicanappen7523]

That is common to hear, bc people who have set the definition for Autism don’t actually understand it at all. It is a spectrum, therefore there are many ways that it presents. I have found the autistic people that hat I’ve met to be some of the most caring and compassionate people I know.

[@fbbWaddell]

Yeah, I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist during a 72 psych hold because of autistic burnout. That being said, everything you said is true. Everytime I open up to a friend about it, they tell me that I don't seem autistic and they don't believe me. It is both a relief and a frustration.

[@fbbWaddell]

@Paul I hope that isn't true.

[@cryolocker0224]

Seeing this made me thankful my mother got me diagnosed early and on therapy really early, Looks like it saved me quite the headache

[@feveraeroelder]

I've been to a psychologist and a psychiatrist to discuss my suspicions of being on the spectrum only to be right away dismissed because I communicate quite well and made eye contact. It's so freaking frustating, not being able to get help or simply speak of my struggles without feeling that I'm making a case or trying to convince people, just because, apparently, I'm not "weird enough" (emphasis on the quotations marks).

[@bas8792]

@Demian ALIKA autism is a lifelong condition, it's not an illness that needs to be cured or reversed.

[@amygoff4127]

My entire family is autistic, I know it's hard to believe but unfortunately it is true. Life has been really hard with little help ): I grew out of some of it but I'm still very misunderstood and that is the most frustrating part of life.

[@t778-c3i]

This was said so perfectly 💕

[@Caetherine]

Thank you for this. I have a friend who is in the spectrum and it's been really interesting to get to know him better. I think it's beautiful we are all differrent. ♥

[@morrows10]

Excellent! This has helped me understand why the whole Autism Spectrum has been so new and inaccesible to me, a 60 year old white female.Please keep talking, and I will keep learning!

[@cookies6455]

Why is it important to tell your ethnicity?

[@Notsosmoothoperator97]

I'm 25 and I always had a feeling but never knew I had ASD and to be honest it's not a negative for me because of how far I've gotten and grown as a person without knowing. If anything finding out gave me closure and made me comfortable understanding who I am and how feel at times. ASD STRONG 💪🏿

[@juliegale3863]

Many, many, many years of masking and not knowing I was masking. Always found it difficult to fit in groups. OK if I ran the group but not joining someone else's group. I did join them but it was always hard. Too late now, I am finding out I am probably autistic via talks like this because I am nearly 90.

[@SnappyWasHere]

I’m 46 and mine was is so severe I learned all my emotions like I learned to ride a bike or a math problem. Just recently found out and the relief from the pressure has flipped my life upside down and relieved all the pressure. Has something similar happened to you?

[@Anita-zb4lm]

Great talk. Thank you ☺️

[@sarahjensen2473]

Excellent summary of the problem!

[@sarahjensen2473]

@Demian ALIKA Autism can be improved, not “reversed.” I am glad to hear that your son’s symptoms have improved, and hope that it was a misdiagnosis. I fear for your son’s future if he truly is autistic because so many parents who refuse to accept that their child has a birth defect will torture them to try to make them act “normal,” leading to a high rate of suicide in people born with ASD.

[@kathyjuneart]

Thank you. 48 with ASD. It took SO many years wading through a bureaucratic and pandemic gauntlet for a diagnosis. Left-handed with 182iq. It's been really difficult. Love to all.

[@andrewhazelwood698]

@Demian ALIKA you can’t reverse autism he simply made him more tolerant to his environment aka you

[@jepoytv29]

I was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was 3yrs old and until up now well, it's very very very hard to control it and to don't show other people what I really am and what is wrong to be like me because there are so little people can only understand what is autism in adults. And I'm 31yrs old this year and well I just want to say that it's very hard to control it while you are growing up. People say that it's easy to remove it and control it but in reality for the people like me well it's more challenging to handle it because of what we are thinking about something. Yeah, it's easy to say that we can control it and we can handle it when we grow up but it's just that it's not easy cause it will never fade away from us and we have to learn to accept that and learn to control it with ourselves. Well, that's the way that I grow up. Just to learn when you growing up. Little people can only understand us autistics but in some way of life, we will find some people who will accept us for who we are and what we are and learn about what is the meaning of autism spectrum disorder in what we growing up too. If it makes some sense to what I'm saying here.

[@Rat1701]

I really do believe I’m autistic, after tons of research and studying and asking my family about how I was as a young child, etc. but I’m scared to actually label myself as such, or to even get assessed.

[@GiraffeChaser]

@demianalika6881what kind of “herbs”

[@kyanilcauli9002]

We are extremely alike. Wish we both have the courage for seeking it out in future.

[@E-SPONGE555]

I am autistic man with asperger's syndrome and PTSD this young gentleman is amazing genius who is a very good at explaining a very complex subject.

[@Josh-zr3jy]

And i as well. Its funny how we are white men and this guy talks like white men do not experience this.

[@silverlagomorpha3177]

“Disciplined , ostracized, or abused.” Yes.

[@mcdaib]

I have a Grandson diagnosed as autistic...my son has worked with him tirelessly and if you met him for the first time I seriously doubt you would see him any differently than any alistic person. They have much insight to offer in our everyday world...

[@paladin313]

I discovered last year that I am autistic--I am 51 years old. I grew up in a time before all this was known like it is now. It explained so much that happened to me. It was not fun, I can assure you. Thus, I can tell you first-hand that trying to "correct" the behavior is entirely useless; you cannot "cure" it, nor should you try. Adults need help as much as youth. Because of what is known now, and knowing that 1 in 60 is autistic (that was the stat the last I checked) then that means that, of say, 330 million people in the USA, 5,500,000 or so people are autistic, and far too many of them don't know it, suffering needlessly in their lives. People need to stop treating this as a "new" phenomenon and realize it's been around in people since there's been air. That has to be recognized, and the only way to do that is to make far more resources available for all ages to help people with autism be who they are and better their lives as a result.

[@waynegray7923]

Don't self diagnose

[@paladin313]

@@waynegray7923 Where did I talk about self-diagnosis?

[@waynegray7923]

@@paladin313 you just said it in your comment "I discovered " not hey my psychologist or doctor discovered that I'm autistic !

[@waynegray7923]

Listen my dude I'm not saying you are autistic or not I don't know you man but theirs alot of people that they say they have something because they think the have one of the signs or they watch video like these when they dont and that with any disease or illness the worst thing anyone can do or anyone is self diagnose them self that's all

[@paladin313]

@@waynegray7923 "I discovered " could mean me or someone else discovering, and then telling me for MY discovery. Trust me, I've had several experts tell me, not just one source. I am on the spectrum. Besides, even if I were self-diagnosed, tell me where there is a massive, not too expensive effort to diagnose adults? It doesn't exist, and that is my point. The medical industry's is far too focused on children and there are few places around that focus on adults. Kids who are autistic become adults who are autistic. My point is, autism has been around since there has been air, and it is only in recent years that we now know what we know. That means millions-no hyperbole there-have suffered needlessly. Would it not be a good idea to give as much attention to adults as to kids?

[@Kageoni187]

Omg, the os explanation is awesome! I am so going to use that when explaining myself and my boys to others.

[@mjf3810]

This was not only informative, but eye-opening! Thank you!!

[@yahowahsWords]

Well, I am a white guy and I did not find out that I was autistic until I was 59. I never connected being autistic to any race or color or gender.

[@jeffreyfernald]

[@masonb9788]

Wonderful talk. Everyone should see this. How many autistic humans have been traumatized by others all in the name of “correcting” them? We have to move away from viewing the autistic as “broken.”

[@bloodclotheart]

Thank you for the thorough explanation! Now I can send this to my family!

[@boywithadolphin]

I am 77 and recently worked out I have Aspergers from watching KZbin. Most of my life I have been unhappy in the company of so called normal people. The last 30 years I have been very happy in the company of academic people, engineers, scientists etc many of whose I suspect have the same condition. We get on well socially with our own kind. It is a gift not a disorder. The world would be much better if there were more of us.

[@CDavLee]

Thank you so much for this talk.

[@lordgrimm2905]

I just found out i might be autistic at 22 by my psychologist, i will confirm it in 2 weeks but dam i felt like i just filled a puzzle in my life

[@nella9115]

28 years old... Currently being assessed and i feel the same way, explains alot

[@justxull9278]

The eye contact thing is a big issue. I personally get panic attacks often if i feel like i have to have eye contact

[@skmuskanrahaman1690]

@Demian ALIKA Please don't believe this doctor.

[@justxull9278]

@@doremirse9950 What does eye contact have to do with my parents?😅

[@Oogasra]

I lack the resources to get diagnosed, but I know I've always been different from others. Most of the people around me don't seem to comprehend Autism as my problem. Autism as a different OS makes a lot of sense.

[@user-ge6uo2ry2b]

44 female recently diagnosed. The relief is immeasurable. Yet the experience is still excrutiating mostly due to social/relational problems.