Why Do Guys Come Back When They Wanted Nothing To Do With You

[@alexandra9985]

This is almost evil, when guys come back, just to play with your emotions...😢 but not with me, thanks to Elliot👍

[@lnoir493]

Not almost. It is evil and God's justice will get them for it.

[@mmc4214]

It's just wrong. Why don't men KNOW THIS? Poor maternal parenting?

[@queenofthecrossroads2613]

@@mmc4214 The answer to your question will offend many, shock a few and make perfect sense to others. I recommend if you REALLY want to know the answer to this you put on your big girl panties and research content on how men are less psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually evolved than women. There is a wealth of information on this topic spearheaded by men themselves. This is not the platform for me to go into details here about it as I really love Elliot’s work and would not want to disrespect his channel. But when I truly understood men for exactly who they are based on their evolutionary nature - it all made soo much sense. What I’m telling you and the information you will find on this topic will only further confirm everything Elliot has been teaching. I still love men! They are very useful but you need to really understand their nature and limitations.

[@coco20165]

that’s why you master the art of having none

[@MissSarahGM]

It's usually not malicious, it's self-serving as they feel low and need validation or even miss you for real. However, that shows they haven't reflected over how their reach out could affect us and mess with our emotions, therefore it's often the sign of low empathy and emotional intelligence, and entitlement.

[@Zane-zr7ic]

Easier than starting again. Other option didn't work out. Wants the assets again easily. Pre qualified

[@elizabethtorrez9232]

whatbif i begged for 6 months before i went into no contact?

[@Lauren_22613]

Elliot is right - this happened to me in the past and it was horrible. Now I am happily single, not dating or looking and increasing my value. Any guy who does this to you is a total Dbag loser!

[@CC-br9qg]

thank you needed this. my ex did this i couldn't respond, he burned every bridge, still hurts to this day. i don't think he has any appreciation for the suffering he put me through. still hurts.

[@isabellenez-tovar803]

Well said sister!

[@mmc4214]

They are F'd up & do not care.

[@Lauren_22613]

⁠@@CC-br9qghi, I too am divorced and still struggle with all my ex did to me. Unfortunately, the guy I was talking about in my post was right after him, so it was like a double whammy and now I’m traumatized, ha. Been single for almost 2 years and I have gotten really used to it; in fact, I actually love it. I hope you get the healing and closure you deserve ❤

[@shaylagoogle3097]

Clearly he's not ok. He wanted his cake until you stop giving him a taste. Then he has to look at you differently. Alot of ppl lost respect for ppl and dating because of hookup culture.

[@kimt8162]

I think he's right. The woman has to be more picky. Case in point: Selena Gomez/Justin Beiber. The reason why it was soooo hard to get over him. She gave him so much time... On and off, on and off. and then quickly marries Hailey. It's my understanding that just one day Hailey was at church and Justin told her "she was the one" for him. So he kind of layed it all out there for Hailey, but did NOT do that for Selena. My guess is when he met Selena he was just so young. But all that time they spent together did not mean MORE closeness. This is why Selena is so confused. Either a guy wants the commitment or he doesn't. Pretty cut and dry. You , as the woman, have to get him to think about it and make the decision.

[@northshorelight35]

I would feel very offended if a guy came back after seriously disrespecting/betraying me. It means that he thinks I'm weak, easily gives in, will just take his crap, don't have options, etc. And after he's done using me, he will just leave again as soon as he sees something new and shiny.

[@moonlightprincess449]

You shouldn’t even be hooking up tbh just hanging out and kissing if anything but not sex that’s the problem right there don’t give sex unless y’all in a relationship

[@Mayfloweralways]

100 percent. And i would add, not until he says it. And makes you a priority. It’s too easy to assume and be wrong.

[@moonlightprincess449]

@@Mayfloweralwaystrue I’ve learned from my mistake, I just from now on will use a vibrator 😂 while talking to people lol

[@Dorafran86]

How to do this, if there's no relationship for a man before sex happens? I see guys saying a woman is a random one for them before this and they build connection only after sex. I'm afraid it's either having sex with hit or miss chances of a relationship later, or no relationships at all since men won't commit without sex first.

[@Rubbberduckyyy]

@@Dorafran86yes they will. Don’t let them manipulate you into thinking this. Relationship needs to come first. Stand up!

[@mmc4214]

Exactly. Let them burn [masturbate] if they can't grow up.

[@LeahHa8]

They want an ego boost because they think you still like them.

[@dixie6294]

Careful,if you dumped them,narcs come back just to dump you!!

[@j-tenn226]

It has definitely happened to me!

[@CC-br9qg]

my ex did this i couldn't respond, he burned every bridge, still hurts to this day. i don't think he has any appreciation for the suffering he put me through

[@orls9068]

He has no appreciation fot your suffering, if he did he wouldn't have put himself in that position Take time and love yourself first, you're so much better off without some who is heartless and selfish you want someone who matches your effort and love He was not good enough for you

[@deborahkorn-g8h]

mine came back - it was subtle in the beginning - texts, phone calls, then lunch , hikes , then sex and for six weeks it was perfect but when I asked for a committment he gradually lost interest. After a perfect day together and then he became amorous - I again brought up committment and he said ' you keep pushing me in a corner with this stuff' I said' I'm not your friend with benefits or your whore' and left. Never saw him again. He has a new girlfriend now. Your videos were helpful in knowing this thing was happening because I was 'pre qualified ' and helped me make the decision to leave based on the fact that he wasn't going to change. Wasn't easy though! Months of sadness as he was like my best friend.

[@mmc4214]

What a jerk. I'm glad you are out but does he have a commitment now?? I don't understand this that's why I'm here. TYIA

[@deborahkorn-g8h]

the girlfriend he had before me lasted eight months - she drove home after spending the week end with him and when she got home he called her and told her it was over - just out of the blue! He has multiple divorces too. but , in the beginning, he love bombs you and makes you feel like you are the best thing he ever met!@@mmc4214

[@rachelross5829]

That's when we realize get the commitment ❤then sex?

[@34Graywolf]

I think us gals need to be logical with this because when guys meet someone they don’t put all their eggs in one basket and start thinking oh I hope she’s the one I’m gonna marry like women do, they are still fishing, gals you need to do that too. After seeing how they are I can’t fall for them anymore, I’ve been treated like shit from men in my own family, intimate partners, husband boyfriends, coworkers friends and listening to Elliot talk about the way they go about dating made me not want them anymore at all. But if I was still dating it would take me a very long time to really like someone or fall in love, he’d have to be very special and I’d probably be talking to multiple men and I wouldn’t go out much because I don’t care and I’d be very distant from them. Women need to be that way because you’re falling for jerks and getting your heart broken when you expect something from the first guy meet

[@Livelearnapply]

Had my ex come back around after 2 years try and feed me this I love you miss u bs line then disappeared for 4 days. I blocked him I wasn’t giving him nothing just watching him and listening kept my mouth and legs closed and just let him be his same self and now he’s blocked still calling 😂 these jokers never cease to amaze me.

[@ak-47intelligence75]

This is blatantly obvious. He wants the cookie. That's all there is to it.

[@mmc4214]

Users!

[@fernfunk]

context is really such an important concept i learnt from you. it throws so much light on a lot of situations and why guys start changing or suddenly change (the context just hits them and spooks them). very helpful 🙏🏼

[@Nono38-jj1tk]

IG? Gross. KZbin is the only social media I use. I view men on social media such as FB and IG as feminine because social media is for validation. You are not feminine at all. You have a job that requires the use of social media. I'm talking about regular guys. Your content is great. I'll be watching everything you post as long as it is on KZbin.

[@lmart16]

What's your attachment style? I agree, but I'm FA. I'm curious.

[@jessicahitchens6926]

That's a huge red flag for me. So called men om social media apps posting nonsense. Especially after 35... Its beyond pathetic and they are weak as f*ck! (Unless they have a business to promote).

[@jessicahitchens6926]

Your attachment styles are only a small part of you. I don't give it that much credence in the schemes of things.

[@brightpage1020]

Who cares!?! F-'em.

[@j-tenn226]

I’m in tears from laughing

[@susan5048]

We as women have to educate ourselves to protect ourselves. Elliot has it spot on . Much of this information I never knew.

[@cherrylane79]

Because they only use you.

[@milakociecka6846]

This content is awesome 🥰 I've bumped on you I think less than two weeks ago and you gave me more than hours spent on listening to a few most popular dating coaches. You made me realize a guy treated me like shit and I will stay strong following through your great advice: As he would try to come back he is gonna have to begging me almost on his knees 😀😆 Thank you. I will keep watching you 💪

[@mmc4214]

I totally agree and am in the exact same situation. Many coaches waste our time with a lot of fluff, videos that are too long without giving the advice that is NEEDED now. TY Elliot. You are my favorite Coach! ♡

[@nightmareappliance]

The best thing is to never return. The ones who are fucking with your head end up fucking up their own heads. Thanks Elliot!

[@kendrav.2088]

" Due to the lack of your interest in our conversations, I realize that my decision to quit talking to you was the right decision" ........ Dude you ghosted me, tired coming back after 2 years and you really think you're going to get a Welcome party! ???? 😂 Frankly my Dear I don't give a Damn!! Being Single is Great!

[@ShainaLuckey]

That’s what he said to you? OMG what a tool.

[@Whoeverwhateverwhenever]

Talking about my ex. Because: 1) he is lonely 2) nobody wants him

[@Whoeverwhateverwhenever]

@BeautyQueen2023X seek help

[@amandavictoriasewell7393]

In order to get back with me he asked me to marry him! Now, several weeks on, there's no mention of that! Played, yet again x

[@mmc4214]

FTS!

[@MissSarahGM]

That's why reconciliation can't be giving it all back at once. Make them work and keep your cards close to your chest.

[@keepsit100atalltime9]

The question should be why do they stay when they want nothing to do with you?

[@oasiscat82]

Woah is it narcissim??

[@CC-br9qg]

that’s what i thought but i think it’s just the lizard male brain

[@MissSarahGM]

Men are more narcissistic and opportunistic. They usually look for control and power, makes their ego happy.

[@soniamoraleschemistry]

Guy showed up after 5 months of not talking. Gave him short replies to show I did not care and have not heard from him. Thank God. Single is better. I always get treated this way. And the guys are the ones who approach me. Makes no sense to me.

[@2.22am]

Hi Eliott, He came back after 3 months after he left me for a girl he met online. He said he wants us back because he understood how much i loved him but not even once said that he feels for me or loves me. I rejected it by saying i am working on myself and don't want to be back again just to see what he has to offer. Since then he didn't contact it's been a week and I didn't hear from him. It hurts but I'm okay I don't want to be disrespected again. Now i don't understand what to do next?

[@MissSarahGM]

You did the right thing. Keep doing nothing. He left you for someone else, it went downhill and now he went back to his safety net. Let him learn from his mistakes. Until he proves himself and says something way more vulnerable. My ex bf also kept contacting me sporadically, and I responded each time for a year. Until I stayed silent. He messaged me again saying all the love I gave him filled his heart and he still carried it.. And other nostalgic things. It got me confused and also rubbed me the wrong way, he was not directly talking about his own feelings but how he enjoyed being loved by me. Given the context of hot and cold, I ignored. It probably is a way for them to not be vulnerable. But they need to be more courageous, they were bold enough to leave so they need to come with a real offer. Like Elliott said, they need to come back in a bigger way, and almost plea. Or how would you know they see your value now and they have grown?

[@2.22am]

@@MissSarahGM thanks. Yeah I'm onto that, doing nothing and watching silently

[@2.22am]

And here 11 days have passed after he contacted last and i didn't hear form him again. I'm standing strong on my ground, won't contact from my side. He has to know it's not like before how it was, he has to know he has to work hard this time to get my love back. Idk if it'll happen or not but I'm not contacting from my side again ever.

[@MissSarahGM]

@@2.22am It's really nothing in terms of a break up, after he was with someone else. You need to think of the bigger picture and long term, as in several months. Do you want him back taking you for granted and leaving again? So you need to connect with your self-worth and anger even. He needs to work to show you he is ready to make amends and commit. If it's too easy, he'll just know you're his safety net and he doesn't even have time to feel any loss.

[@jessicahitchens6926]

I hope you blocked and moved on..

[@gertrudesmith9852]

You’re awesome thank you! You should marry me. 🤣 at least you are honest 🤷‍♀️

[@GOTHICMAMBA35]

I had this but its bettwr now. He had a girlfriend at the time and disappeeared. He apologized and now talks to me like a real person and not an object

[@carlyc9891]

Gotta block him in these situations

[@tormentors]

Ego what else? 😂😂

[@kimxx8797]

How do you book a session? I got a lot of questions and need help making a decision.

[@amandaserle3343]

He told me he wanted a relationship, blocked me 5 months ago for no reason whatsoever.

[@Reshme77]

Good question

[@anonymous-vr8ex]

Great content as always, you're always real....

[@VivaciousViv76]

Thanks!

[@tb22k]

❤❤thank u

[@Kevti1127]

So much wisdom in such a short video. It was much needed as it seems we women give a totally different meaning to guys actions which is the primary cause of our suffering. Heating things the way they are has been such a relief. Thank you immensely from all my heart

[@steph6109]

Elliot, what if the problem isnt men wanting to 'take you off the dating market' but thats where they hold you. Never anything past engagement. How do you vet and understand those men? Exactly the same or is there weight to them taking you around, playing house, family introductions etc Could you add non hookup culture elements to your videos. Us 'conservative' women are having the same problems as the progressives.

[@justacoginthefkery]

You honor your boundaries & let him go. He's using you as a placeholder to avoid being alone while still hoping something better might come along. Unfortunately for guys like that, they never appreciate what they have until they lose it, then have to deal with the regret for the rest of their lives. He can't hold you in limbo if you're not willing to stay there. If he won't move forward, you still can... You're just gonna have to leave him behind.

[@siusi]

Can I send him a long message on how my feelings been hurt and im leaving to him when he comes back and texts me “how ya doin?”

[@lizowens4111]

Would like the get the free book

[@MarleneForester]

What if you don’t sleep with them and you tell them you want a relationship and they ghost you slowly do they ever come back?

[@sherriflemming3218]

They can however why would you want him back.

[@amandaserle3343]

Wasn't intimate with him either.

[@lihong9389]

I am a convenient 😢😮😂

[@JoyJoy-my3cj]

GREAT haircut, Elliot! 👍🏼

[@meeksmiinkboutique1681]

Love your lives too!!!🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@meeksmiinkboutique1681]

Love your lives too!!!🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@jjk1894]

Free guide link please

[@jjk1894]

Here's the best photo of you ever and love your smile 9:49

[@jjk1894]

How can I send you the photo on here?

[@Lara-j3f]

How about if he weaseled his way back after a week of break up ?

[@Mayfloweralways]

If he came back without making any permanent changes or commitment that you asked for or wanted, he likes to keep what’s easy to gain access to and what’s comfortable, but has no intention of doing anything differently. Guys that are very serious lay it all out for you and step up without wavering back and forth.

[@Lara-j3f]

@@Mayfloweralways I am aware of all his strategies and plans . We went through 3 break ups already , being a part just for few days . The sad reality he has bipolar disorder and he is recently divorced . Now after he came back , he is promising me of a commitment but he is giving me more of his time and other resources .

[@KomalJhaOnline]

The pattern. Watch the pattern. Patterns always repeat!

[@Rubbberduckyyy]

@@Lara-j3fdump him. He’s a time waster

[@mmc4214]

True. I've been in the loop & for 5 wasted years. Don't be me. I'm done with it now. Done. He can kiss my ass & he'll need to move a giant mountain to see it again, if ever. Why don't these guys get it? Are they stupid? I'm in shock over how dumb their game is. I will not play anymore...

[@Hir_zKhan]

Why do you make such long videos, honestly it gets so boring eventually and have to skip it

[@pinchecarlos11]

It’s under 10 minutes. Work on your attention span. 🙄

[@j-tenn226]

I’m screaming 😂😂

[@annas9720]

For me, it’s not long enough 🤷🏼‍♀️😅 looks like your the problem

[@Hir_zKhan]

@@pinchecarlos11 seems like you don't have any other thing to do 😎

[@Hir_zKhan]

@@annas9720 yeah for those it's not long who just scroll KZbin throughout their day

[@SydneyBabe]

Free guide