Winning A Custody Battle | Four Things You Must Do

With divorces comes another inevitable battle - getting custody of your child/ren. As a former custody examiner for the court, I've picked up several pointers on how to face this difficult and trying time. In this video, I'll be discussing FOUR tips on what you can do for you and your child/ren during a custody battle.
00:18 Two worlds
01:40 Number one factor that creates negative outcomes for children in divorce
03:50 Be authentic
05:28 Be nice
07:09 Be focused on the kids
08:51 Be a good parent
Watch and Enjoy!
Dr. Paul Jenkins
WHAT TO WATCH NEXT
============================
How To Get A Custody Of A Child
• How To Get A Custody O...
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Video by Nate Woodbury
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#LiveOnPurpose
#PositiveParenting

[@eponymoususer8923]

You’re right. This is the right response. Courts don’t usually care about the Children’s best interests. They’re still treating child custody as a division of property.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you for watching.

[@nathanmciver6496]

You know how important this is for a healthy community? Honest people rather than smooth groups feeding the people and seeking help and these people are sick and secret house's the same as before because the issue's where never resolved! Wow, thanks! Kindness was needed tonight! 😢 I was nice, they won't grow being fed lie's!!! Wow, junky trump seems to get the kid and yet line's where crossed! So why is it right that courts charged for crime's that never happened years ago and yet they allow line's to be crossed with the step kids towards my biological birth child! Once is still not acceptable and resources are to expensive yet lawyers and immigrants are avaible at any time to take over your life and disturb the growth of your child for thier own greedy needs while pretending to feed others so they look inncent while robbing the life's of other's and forcing thier curruption!!!!!! English language first, sick con artists! Why tell the truth when they ptetend they don't know or remember, and then give the same information to have the same problems happen again when they could not have people singled out to fit the needs of people who pretend to be victims while disrepecting people who want a smaller downsized life because they picked up cell phone's and calles around everyone in the neighbourhood when they where kids and want to be done with these crime's and game plays

[@jumpinggakflash2313]

The court is the main driver of the conflict between parents because it's all set up like a game where, if you have enough money to do so, you can be a "winner who takes all." The best interests of the child standard is anything but. We need family court reform.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I hope you have seen a newer video on why family court is not the place to solve family problems.

[@zoepetersen6636]

The court isn't in the child's best interest at all. The court legalises child abuse

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Zoe Petersen, thank you for watching, when the court gets involved almost no one is ever happy.

[@davidthompson410]

No such thing as winning a custody battle unless it ends up being 50/50 split kids deserve both parents

[@JR-bg5ot]

@@davidthompson410 yes I agree kids DESERVE both parents BUT either parent may not deserve the child. Sometimes one parent or both are horrible people and neither deserve parenting. Or a lot of times one parent is fit and that parent never gets the child.

[@davidthompson410]

@@JR-bg5ot yeah I agree plus 1can be influenced too much by there partner who the child don't have any connection 2

[@davidthompson410]

Devastated just seen my eldest at the local Tesco not seen them since last march 2020 she said go away & was all very close to her mums bf gave me a smug smile sick that is & social plus court help this happened as court orders ain't worth the paper there on

[@DavidBaronStevensPersonal]

I dig the idea of treating court as a 'job interview' to be your kid's parents. It'sa hard pill to swallow but it's the truth.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I've seen it happen many times.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@wanderingjooh6843]

Thanks, you are helping. I APPRECIATE your time.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Glad to help

[@Asriel821]

Unfortunately I've got an ex that does not want to work at parenting, seriously I'm so sick of it, all he wants to do is win, I just want to see my kids

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Silver Seraph, putting the kids first is most important, stay focused.

[@Asriel821]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV I am trying, I've been the one wanting to co parent

[@Manicmarshall]

SAME

[@Hypnotikshiva]

If already I started my road of custody with Mom keeping my son away from me, it's already a red flag.. so sure I'm and will be focused on my child, it's the other side that poses like she will play the difficult card but we'll see what the outcome will be as I need to serve her the paperwork next.

[@alissadilts9629]

I'm going through the same thing right now because he's mad I found someone who treats me better

[@DavidBaronStevensPersonal]

This is great advice sir. Thank you for sharing such valuable knowledge for free. I'm representing myself in the UK as a Litigant in Person. Every bit of advice I try to apply, because I'm the only one speaking for my child. Judges see disingenuous people all day. Be genuine, defend your kids, even if you have to lose a bit. A good judge knows that a parent will give up what is theirs to save their child, not unlike the biblical story of Solomon and the two mothers. A parent that puts "me first" at the cost of the child will lose every time.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

So true.

[@Just-observing.]

Absolutely! …in a morally correct world.

[@LivingBGLegend]

I abstained from litigation to spare Hope the trauma and pain. When with hope I provide drama free environments, wherever we go because she’s my little princess and somewhere in it is a deep father daughter connection and I hurt and can’t sleep if she is she I just want to see her without outsiders, I want it to be natural as she deserves that. We have so much to talk about in terms of everything except the stuff me and her mom went through

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Living Legend, yes, focus on your relationship and built that strong connection.

[@NovatheDawn]

Thank you.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

You are welcome.

[@Knightfelled]

I grew up in this environment after my mother and father separated at an early age and both of them used myself, brother and sister as ammunition on the other and as a result I can't stand and don't want to speak to both of them

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Jord Rich, I am sorry. I get what you are saying.

[@FaithfulandTrue949]

Yes it backfires, I'm truthful about their experience I won't gaslight my little ones and also speak kindly about their dad. When older I hope they are equipped to protect themselves and draw their own conclusions about actions matching words. Educate kids about what love and care is versus what is toxic so they are free to choose. People are more aware that a subset of Narcissisticly abusive individuals are only out for number 1. Sorry to hear your experience, may you heal those wounds. Dr Ramani is good if this resonates with you.

[@jaygrist165]

Thankyou for uploading this episode, I am currently building my new home for myself and for the visits of my kids, I'm in good relations with the children's mother and we're both working flat out to make a realistic safe & happy home environment for them, at mum's and dad's houses, I like the way you objectively see the transitions of positive change for the children to & how they see the entirety of the new concepts available, all is well, very busy as you can appreciate, thanks again, respect, best wishes, J❤

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I wish you and your family well.

[@MountainHiker23]

I’ve been myself and nice and honest since I left and taken the high road despite being constantly falsely accused and negatively barraged by the ex. For three years post divorce. Never retaliated, never attacked him, despite him breaking the law and the decree. He already has primary custody, Despite that he still attacks me and tries to keep our child from me. For no reason other than payback and control. I wish all evaluators could see what your saying. Because I’ve done all that.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Julie D H, I wish they could also. Thank you for sharing.

[@TightNinja]

How did he get primary custody may I ask?

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@pcharm3711]

I love this guy 😅

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thanks!

[@venessariley3285]

Thank you for sharing these tips, I have hired a lawyer form David Phillips Law and they are truly one of the best!

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I wish you well.

[@steveswamp]

Simple truths that are sometimes easy to lose track of in a stressful and drawn out custody dispute. Great video

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

So true!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@shannonshort4987]

I'm fighting my own sister in court right now and I've done everything. I had another child with the same woman and we have our youngest kid but not our oldest kid. I pray we get our oldest kid back. My sister is getting us with 600 a month in child support.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Shannon Short, I wish you luck.

[@jessicawhite8861]

Hello if you need real and sure solutions, I can refer you to the powerful African priest that worked for me

[@jessicacrane1970]

@@jessicawhite8861 how can he help

[@jessicawhite8861]

@@jessicacrane1970 I contacted him and I was given an instruction and also had to pay a small amount for the things he needed to work for me and with that I got my desired victory

[@samanthaleslie7974]

I'm fighting my brother in law and sister in law so I know the pain

[@LivingBGLegend]

I liked the ad, watched a minute of it, she said my name and I don’t hear that often from a woman as I’ve stayed single

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Living Legend, thanks for watching.

[@robertcoltrain3482]

The court incentivizes lying by rewarding custody to the lying parent. It is incentivized by failure to punish. Of of the parent being lied about gets pissed. Until lawyers and their clients are severely punished for this activity, it will continue.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you.

[@PedroCouto1982]

​@LiveOnPurposeTV If one of the parents is, for instance, a narcissist, there will be a tendency to lie and manipulate. The other parent might accept more sacrifices for the children. I know a case, where a parent doesn't speak with any of the numerous siblings because of conflicts, and the 10-year-old child has been obese for 8 years, complains about aggression, and wants to be with the other parent. But the judge says children lie and the problem is the conflict among the parents. If one of the parents tends to have unhealthy conflicts with everybody, doesn't that "excuse" (but doesn't remove responsibility) the other parent who doesn't have training in assertive communication and is caught in unusual dilemmas?

[@Siege513]

"I never ask a child which parent do you want to live with. That's such an unfair question." What about when one parent is an unpredictable, lying narcissist that the children want to get away from?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

It is difficult for children, yet I have met many who are mature and old enough to articulate what they want. Every case is different.

[@jans724]

The judge and evaluators don't care about the child. And if you're dealing with a mother who is emotionally and physically abusing the child they don't care and won't react. You can "co-parent" with a narcissistic psychopath and they will still advice you to "get along". I've been through this and am shocked at how little they actually care about the child. In my case I have 50 % / 50 % custody but it comes after two years of battle where the covert narcissist mother has launched all kinds of false allegations. Anyone could see it's false allegations but they don't care. And my daughter has to be exposed to it 50 % of the time.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am so sorry. No one really knows what it is like until they go through it.

[@jans724]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thanks! I agree, it's not possible to really understand unless you've experience it.

[@henrypeterson7411]

Is it possible to put in custody orders that, Since it’s in the best interest of the child for as much funds as possible to go toward the child, that funds being tied up in court battles because of False Allegations is not in the best interest of the child and that by making false allegations against the other parent will result in an immediate change in custody, costs for custody modification to be paid for by the false accuser. Basically make the punishment for making false allegations so severe no parent would want to do it

[@angelalopez5272]

My daughter’s husband abused her and yielded at her and the baby and now she has to put up with the family court judge who wanted him to be part of the baby, he was the one who abused them, who left them . Not sure about this law. Why the stupid court decides who the baby supposed to be with. No wonder why those guys continue abusing those kids and women

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am glad she is putting herself and her child in a safer place. It isn't an easy road, but things should get better for her.

[@Nyc440]

I’m in court right now don’t understand how, me and my fiancé told her mother we going in the army a couple weeks later we drop my 2year off to see her for 2hours, she locks the doors wouldn’t give our son back we call cops they do nothing tell us go to court, we in court and judge is letting my 2year stay with her when he’s lived with me and my fiancé at my moms house he only met my fiancé mom 4times just corrupt judge at this point

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

That doesn't sound right at all. The custodial parent should get custody.

[@mindyobidness86]

I petitioned for 50/50 custody of my daughter because her mom was keeping her from me for months after our last argument. Its been 11 months and I'm just now starting to see her again, she is 8. First weekend she came over she told me mom has a new boyfriend that lives with them now and his 2 sons that are visiting for the summer. We haven't went to trial yet, can I change to full custody in the middle of it based on the facts she kept my daughter from me, she tells my daughter to keep stuff from me, and this is the second guy that I know of in the past year or 2 thats she's been with. The last guy she didn't want me to meet him and I dont know what capacity he had been around my daughter but I Know he has been to her house at the very least. Now this guy has moved in with 2 boys, 10 and 12. In another 2 years it will be another guy, you get the point. Can I change to full custody based on change of circumstances after re-entering the child's life due to moms behavior? And she also already violated our temporary agreement. I was suppose to get her this weekend and she tells me 4 days before that she's going out of town for the 4th of July which is Tuesday. So now I have to wait 3 weeks to see my daughter cause she tells me my daughter told me they was going out of town. Using her to communicate when we just had mediation almost 3 weeks ago and she didn't mention her going out of town and she said I couldn't get her that weekend of mediation cause she had a dance tournament that she put her in during her being away from me.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

This is more of a legal question and so an attorney might be a better person to ask. Document and offer solutions to any changes. Could you take the daughter to the dance tournament or have an extra weekend since you are missing that one. You might want to write that in the agreement.

[@MrProfessional777]

Her new boyfriend shouldn't be the reason you change your argument. You'll lose. Document and expose her behaviors. Then prepare for a Custody Evaluation. Cause its coming and the Court might make you pay for it. $2500-$5000 easy.

[@kx80moto]

Put kids first!!!!

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

grey wolf, amen.

[@LivingBGLegend]

I came here looking for help, advice, direction

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Living Legend, it is hard in a video to speak to individual cases where there are so many personalized things going on. Each case is unique.

[@ElpheltStan]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV I hope it goes/went well!

[@khurrambinmubarak7118]

Bro I need help as well. Please talk to me so that we both can discuss to find best way forward to get custody of our kids

[@rockyjohnson3938]

Hope your good

[@tentoonehc]

This channel is great so is command the court room

[@RogerRamos-gw9hd]

Im in Texas, my ex wife is not complying with the court orders and she doesn't let me see my son just because I broke up with her she's doing what she wants with my son and lives in Mexico with her new boyfriend and I'm already going to have a six court hiring, shes being served to go.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I hope it works out and you can have a wonderful relationship with your son.

[@ViniciusSousa-mt8kw]

I was looking for adeptus custodes battle report......

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Glad you found us anyway.

[@afrofeast]

This aint what evaluators do in Australia. I'll tell you what they do: write a sham story for the ex to take sole custody and therefore matrimonial property.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

d g, I am so sorry. It sounds like this has happened to you.

[@afrofeast]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV It did. Happens to millions of other men here as well. Authenticity doesn't work im afraid.

[@mrorange3490]

I’m the one who has taken care of our 3 boys since they were born while my wife travels and cheats and acts single and she also has been in and out of the hospital for mental illness. She wants to try to get the kids away from me to spite me and hurt me. Our oldest son has a severe heart defect and brain damage from A stroke. My wife has many narcissistic traits, and she just wants to hurt the kids in order to hurt me

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

So sad, I hear this all the time. Stay with your kids.

[@runr100]

Yup. When one person only wants power and control, the children suffer greatly.

[@nathanmciver6496]

Wait, was able to see my daughter tomorrow and now my wife wants to push this issue further! Also she acused me before this inncodent of abuse and not a single bit of evidence yet they "kept " getting away with this! So when is this going to stop because this type of phycological abuse has went on for years and they play this sharaid over and over! So what could have been a simple problem solved is now prolonged because of greed and I am the legal gardian and don't want my child there because of safety reasons and also witnessed somthing before of concern with one of the step kids yet solved the problem myself knowing no one cares and plays the game

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am sorry you are going through this. It will probably stop when your ex moves onto something else.

[@jodiebrown9787]

Great, thank you! At what age can a child decide which parent it wants to live with?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Jodie Brown, it depends on the child and their maturity. They definitely should be asked this by the court and their reasoning taken into consideration. I think judges give it more credence when they are nearing teen years.

[@bbailey7740]

it?

[@ItsMeAnn628]

In TX it’s 12/13

[@lorrinekaai7489]

My son has been taking care of the kids ever since his wife left him for her boyfriend he was having a hardtime hiring a babysitter so his mother in law told him she would look after them while he goes to work and when he went to pick up the kids she gave the kids back to his wife ) but I don't know if anything has been solved between them and they are still married but they no longer live together so my son is paying her child support money)

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I hope he has retained a lawyer if he wants to have custody of the kids.

[@lorrinekaai7489]

My son cannot afford to get an attorney and he just gave up and decided to let his wife have their 2 sons but he still her child support he feels it's a hope less case

[@lorrinekaai7489]

He's paying her child support)

[@wiltzvilcena8740]

Sad,, You’re Addressing Your GrandChildren as “The Kids” ,, wonder Why He Felt He Had To Go To The Other Side For Help Only To Be Screw’d.. Why Couldn’t you Help so??

[@saw727]

i always enjoy listening to your advice.... it has helped. Change is always possible 🙏

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Absolutely! Thanks for being here at the channel, Florida.

[@TheRosegodess]

What if shes terrified of him? But he's careful to never allow proof.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Primalrose, talk to your lawyer about the best way to get the information in front of the court.

[@suddenlyhope]

So what did I do if my ex husband has turned my children against me and alienated them. I haven’t seen my boys for 10 months and my daughter (the only one within the age for shared custody) for 3 months. He has smeared me to the courts and everyone else in our circle that will believe him because I left our toxic marriage. I was the stay at home mom and the involved parent. Now he is claiming that I did all the things in the relationship that he did...emotional abuse, controlling and manipulation. My children are left with a loyalty conflict. If they live me and decide to see me then he will discard and devalue they. They desire a relationship with him and he is now doing his best to be father of the year so the courts will think I am the problem. If he can make me out to be the problem then the pathology that is really going on will stay hidden. The trauma bond he has created with the children has alienated them from me. My heart is broken. Do I step back and just wait for them to come when them are ready? Or do I try to fight to get them back. I want to do what is in their best interests. They are 24,19, and 14.

[@suddenlyhope]

Literally the day I signed the papers and he was served was the day the boys stopped having anything to do with me. Before that we had a good relationship.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

SuddenlyHope, this is a big change for the family. You might not have been happy, but the kids were used to the family dynamics and it may take some time for them to understand what is happening. There isn't much you can do about the adults except be open to them and make yourself available, checking in however you are able. Don't talk bad about your ex, just state the facts and how you felt if they ask. I wouldn't play his games, but be positive and honest with your kids.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

SuddenlyHope, they see it as you changed what they were used to and are breaking up the family. It will take some time for them to realize why you saw it necessary to do this.

[@suddenlyhope]

Live On Purpose TV Thank you. The “adults” are still living with him. So they refuse any contact with me and I have no opportunity. They haven’t replied to any of my texts though I keep it neutral and say “I love you” or I hope your having a good day.

[@bbailey7740]

So sorry for this. There are always two sides. I hope you find peace and a loving, fulfilling relationship with all your kids.

[@marcusavila2961]

@6:42 you’re sick in the head if you push peoples button to get a reaction, to conclude fitness or not. But thanks for your honesty.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

You are welcome.

[@LivingBGLegend]

I hope to God her mom didn’t punish her for what I saw with my own eyes.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Living Legend, I hope so too.

[@itsabouttogetreal8051]

What if the environment at the fathers house is toxic to the children? To the point that one is now in therapy? No custody order established yet, just verbal. But the father has more money and will become violent if the children are taken away.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Talk to your lawyer and see what you can put together for a judge to look at. Remember, anything presented needs to be done without emotion from you.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@murraymarshawn2175]

If children love both parents, why do courts and evaluators entertain so many reallocations when there has been no crime and when the basis for the reallocation (something other than 50-50) is one parent's bad opinion of the other?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Murray Marshawn, I am not sure, it is difficult to speak to individual cases.

[@murraymarshawn2175]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV In any other area of life, to defer to one person's opinion about another is a violation of human rights. In the absence of a crime, to reduce any parent below 50% is a violation of the child's human rights and that parent's human rights. Period.

[@geesmomma9183]

Is dad getting psych eval same as custody eval... We're in CA

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Gees Momma, I am not familiar with CA law, but I wouldn't think there would be one unless there is a reason and it is court ordered.

[@jdad3032]

1.5x speed is perfect :)

[@lemnseeds6422]

Please PLEASE tell me how to move out of my dads house I’m begging you I will do anything I hate that man I can’t imagine waiting ‘till I’m 16 I can’t stand staying at my dads any longer before outright slapping him and his girlfriend

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

『Lemøn Śeeds, have you talked to him? Have you told him that you don't want to be there? Don't hit or act out, that won't help anything.

[@BrownDracula]

Nice...10:32 of irreplaceable time that I won't get back

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Try another video.

[@Jakilyn]

We are co-parenting and my ex now wants sole custody because I have to move 25 miles away...due to lack of housing in our town & our rental selling to a private owner..I am so stressed I will lose my child

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Jackie C, continue to look for a place to live and show what you have done when you go in. 25 miles sounds reasonable.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him

[@FOREIGNLANGUAGEE]

He saying all that then turn out and report to the court that dad is bitter that mom can get custody, just because mom show a different side FT. He’s just doing it for view he know very well how the things are.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you for watching.

[@whofarted2903]

I have faith in god God would never allow my ex to do the co parent with me Especially after everything with the gang Rape couldn't prove it do course This angers me my boys had to suffer with me he would lock me out the front door with. My son with me he was yuck a real price of work he was thank God Been free from that man since 2015

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Glad you are in a much better place.

[@whofarted2903]

Live On Purpose TV Thankyou doctor yeah it's taken me since 2015 to recover still working on me my ex sucked all the Beauty and goodness out of me

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

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[@wannellalawson4001]

Can grandparents attend child custody court. If they are do they have to get on stand. Thanks

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Wannella Lawson, There have been lots of changes since COVID, many hearings are done over Zoom. Talk to your child who should be able to ask their attorney or call the court.

[@lauanagirard5195]

Yes my mom did and the judge didn't take anything she said into consideration being I was the "abusive partner" and the dad was the "victim" I lost my children due to an argument me and their father got into about infidelity and he went to court and said I threatened his life and his sister-in-law is a lawyer and they know the judges in town and I lost my kids over an argument that I had with their father that had nothing to do with our children whatsoever. I have always been a great mom and I miss my kids every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year and it has been 6 years that I've been without my three beautiful children over a narcissistic father who has a domestic violence restraining order against me permanently please someone help me.

[@suprsleep]

What if your child only wants to live with you and doesn’t want to live with the other parent ?

[@rainabo4597]

listen to your kids always. there might be more going on than you know.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Jason Scott, make sure the child is heard, but honestly, judges usually give access to both parents unless there is a reason not to.

[@kathynornhold5111]

I certainly support being authentic and benevolent, accurately communicating the gentle and loving relationships I have with my kids. I want to be able to peacefully coparent for my child's sake. AND, their dad has been and is emotionally and verbally abusive to them and me. I can't be authentic if I don't share the truth of who he is and how he's caused serious psychological harm to our children. I am not out to do battle, but I am going to do all I can to protect my child (one of our children is still under 18). Do you have advice for navigating this?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

We should always protect our children from harm. I still stand by not bad-mouthing another parent. Their behavior speaks volumes and when we provide a positive example the difference is blaring.

[@briandlamini7658]

My daughter, 4yrs 8months, told me about her mother's boyfriend (had just separated for about months) and that mom told her not to tell me. I asked the mother not to introduce her boyfriend/s to my kids (4yrs, & 10mon -son), it's too early and my daughter hasn't accepted nor was it explained to her what happened between us. She shouted at my child for telling lies, told me there is no one, and no one came to the house. About 2-3weeks later, my kids came to visit me, as we were playing, my daughter told her her mother's boyfriend took off all his clothes, I was so mad, asked her again and captured it on a video. Confronted the mother, she even yelled at me for believing a child. Next thing, my daughter showed me the boyfriend, she refused me access, i went in anyway to see if my child has been lying or not. Found out indeed there is a person. Opened a case against both of them and restraining order. The mother refused to give the identity, address and contacts of the boyfriend to the police and court, had to be told if he doesn't come, they will arrest him. Only then she gave his email to be served. The nanny also told me she's scared for my daughter and what's happening in that house. The school are concerned about my daughter's behavior, she's very emotional , low self-esteem, cries without a reason and covers her eye with hands, she's rude at other kids and plays alone most of the time. The mother was told, yet, I found out after and I'm the one taking the child to a psychologist. A 4yr old child knows another man's body and tattoos next to his genitals, while I as her father, I don't even undress next to her. She even got on my back while laying down, and started grinding on me as if she's having sex, I asked where did she see that, she couldn't say. The mother lies a lot, and for some reason, she portrays herself as a victim (by crying) and me being bitter. Yet, I'm fighting for what my kids are exposed to, and I did ask her, she lied, many times, even have WhatsApp conversations proof. And worse, to even go to the extend of protecting her bf over her child. Now her bf opened a case of attempted murder against me, cause I threatened him with a knife that I will kill him if he ever come come to my kids, gave him 5 min to get his things and leavea. The mother was busy slapping and kicking me, ended up slapping her once. She opened assualt case. Now I have 2 cases against me for fighting for my kids' wellbeing, as a result of a mother who lied, exposed my kids, worse now, cut me off from them. I want custody over my kids. I trusted their mother with them,

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I wish you the best in your custody case. You sound like a responsible father who wants the best for his children.

[@robynedward125]

I find it so sad these are innocent children in all this the 4 old yr I feel for her It's Horrible you fight back no justice I'm trying to do whats best like many of you that are victims of conjugal abuse I'm a survivor he's attacking me through another party I had to block them both we cannot co parent they are spreading lies things I never did I feel are kids are suffering more because of it the other parent isn't being reasonable not playing fair only wants to win doesn't seem to care about the kids well being. I worry about further abuse It's more emotionally mentally different factors It's very tough. He's hurt the children and lied about it hasn't done further abuse placed the kids in the middle u listen to kids behavior their words and don't question them about anything to with their father or why they act a certain way because of all these court documents I'm better careful what I don't say like eggshells kinda careful I keep a journal over 2 yrs document different ways. I need strength going against him in trial this will be the toughest thing I've done.

[@williamcass6417]

What if the 13 year old child absolutely hates the mother with a passion and wants to go with the dad??? (We live in South Africa) Edit :I'm the thirteen year old

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Michael Minecraft, not sure what your court system is like. Here you would have a representative to voice what is best for you or your desires. Ask your dad if he has a lawyer.

[@bagjuicemami]

Tell your lawyer your preference and make sure it is stated in court. You don’t want any ambiguity if you feel so strongly.

[@marcusavila2961]

Be authentic, don’t be angry …. How high should i fly?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

It is in how we express our thoughts and feelings.

[@robynedward125]

I find you have to look at it as a chess game it's really difficult or a job interview I'm dealing with high conflict personality narcissist. I'm not in the mindset of I have to win I tried to settle the divorce I'm the victim of conjugal violence that's on going. I never lied I have told the truth I only care what's best by our children. It's been tough very tough. I never wanted the kids in the middle I never alienated our children I don't like the situation it's beyond tough. I find it very sad in this case for our children's sakes why I find it sad. I tried to be reasonable all that matters in the end is the children's well being.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

You sound focused and on the right track. The kids will see what is going on as they get older.

[@anvy1231]

I have court Tomorrow after sharing 50/50 custody for 4yrs now. I’m so scared to lose time with my child. She is my everything. Only 6 and it’s because her mother wants to homeschool her and I want her in private school

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I wish you well.

[@brittanycollins7408]

Why don't you just reach out to JAY_ARNAULT

[@brittanycollins7408]

He's a private investigator and he helped me with my own custody battle

[@brittanycollins7408]

You can look him up on Instagram

[@patrickt5685]

But what if it's involving a 3 month old baby that can't talk and evidence points some nasty things on custodial side?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Patrick T, use the evidence, present it in a calm manner and have the court rule.

[@patrickt5685]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV understood. However just today..given the evidence and the bogus answers from mother and day care, my attorney advised me not to report as abuse to cps or anything. I was rather shocked and confused. Now I'm afraid of something worse happening and the fact I didn't say anything and I highly suspect. Im so confused.

[@patrickt5685]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you for your response too!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@walterpeck5214]

i have a question. my baby momma has had my son taken away. i hot full temporary custody because she had her mom watching my son as she was on meth. and im about to go for full custody. any advice

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Walter Peck, present your evidence in a very calm way, don't get upset and keep calm.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142

[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@lauanagirard5195]

I love this advice and I wish I'd seen and known this information before I went to court and lost custody of my 3 kids 6 years ago.....May God make their Fathers heart open so I can be the Mom the need, want, and deserve.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Lauana Girard, You are the mom they need, never give up hope to be reunited.

[@TheLRGrider]

LETTTTT.. MEEEE… GUESS?? Lmfao!! A T.. - F I R S T..,, I GUARANTEEEEEE!!!!! You, Are-NOTT-Sayinggg!, YOU We’re, Keeping The Children-AWAY!!! From THE-FATHERRR!!!!!???!!!?? Weren’t!?!?!? YOUUU!?!?

[@rukia3219]

What if dad hasn't been in the picture for years and instead of dad's world it's grandma's world?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

The principles are the same. The parties might be different.

[@sarasantiago2684]

This video makes it more confusing I guess because I’m not dealing with a parent who wants to coparent at all so I can’t understand this because my ex is an abusive covert narcissist

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you for your comment. There may be a different discussion here. We do offer a free 30-minute coaching session that may serve you. Here is the link: calendly.com/liveonpurpose-team/free

[@kennycaughlin]

What do you do when your 14 year old son tells you he wants to live with you full time because he "I don't like what mommy does to me". She has hit him a few times, she even tied him to a bed!! To top that off - she punched herself in the face and gave herself 2 black eyes - then went to the hospital and told them her son did it to her! What do you do in these circumstances?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Kenny Caughlin, get an attorney to help you through the process and document everything.

[@alpha6games751]

Document document document. At 14 he may be able to ask for the right to decide if I’m correct. I could be wrong. Different states have different laws.

[@TheTrinettabradshaw]

Call cps

[@99fxgtjc]

Help

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I hope the video is helpful.

[@bgsunlimited]

Your issues ARE their issues, when the biggest issue is that one parent illegally witholds the child. I wish more lawyers & "child professionals" would be honest about the custody process.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

It is a process that is hard to predict.

[@prarthanajacharya2131]

You need to ask the child which parent they need. It's fundamental right of the child. And no children don't love the selfish/narc parent. They are innocents who tell the truth. And which better way to get the truth than through the child. If both deserve the child, then the child will choose both. C mon... the American family court is careless. It's sad.

[@lorrinekaai7489]

My son does not have custody for his two kids but his paying his cheating wife child support and he no longer live with his wife too he took care of his kids when his wife left and his mother in law told my son she would look after the kids when he go to work and surprise, surprise when her daughter moved back to her mom's place she gave the kids back to her

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Lorrine Kaai, I don't think the kids are the mother in laws to give to whoever she wishes. Your son needs to see a lawyer.

[@nicolesnyder6818]

NOBODY “WINS” in a custody battle, Sir. This sick belief is what is destroying these children s lives. Shame on you.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you, good reminder.

[@shaymaarbirouk572]

My cousin is going throw one right now she already spent $22.000 on layer she doesn’t do drugs she has a stable house hold She was pregnant when the divorce happened he was saying that the baby it’s not his she has total of 3 kids with him 6,5 and a 2 years old he never given her a penny he never took the 6 and 5 years old for a hair cat he doesn’t know their doctor their activities she had a 50/50 every wen Thur with him and every other week he’s in and out of jail he does drugs every day and he post it on Facebook his mom was the one who pick up the kids all the time one time he went to jail for one month and his mom was still picking up the kids with out telling my cousin what’s going on an other time my cousin when to pick up the kids no one was in the house she start calling everybody until he answer her with no care in the world that his mom took the kids to a different state and that they will be back in two days she called the police they said that they couldn’t do anything yesterday they had an other hearing and the judge added the 2 year old to the agreement the judge was very dismissive to my cousin and her lawyer every time the lawyer objected the judge refused to hear Lawyer :His a drug attic and we have proof Judge : people change Layer : they took the kids with out the mother’s knowledge Judge : they didn’t know Lawyer: the house has 4 room it’s him his girlfriend their baby the mother the grandmother and grandfather how they gonna add 3 kids to that Judge : it will be like big family house hod Lawyer : he said he was working how is he gonna take care of 4 kids and his mom is a traveling nurse Judge ask the grandmother she said I will quit my job Than the judge looked at my cousin and start laughing and ordered that the almost 2 year old baby start with 8h every weekend for two months than 1 overnight for 1 month than the 50/50 And all this is not even half of it And btw this judge wasn’t the one assigned to her and she’s been with before But to me this was an obvious case of discrimination from the judges part

[@shaymaarbirouk572]

So if you can please tell me what we are doing wrong because she didn’t want money she just want her kids he can visit them as much as he wants just not the overnight

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

shaymaar birouk, I really appreciate you watching and trying to help your cousin. Unfortunately, I am unable to give specific legal advice. I come to the table with a psychologist's perspective. I did help with custody evaluations for 13 years, and I share whatever I can help with in my child custody playlist. You may find something useful there: kzbin.info/aero/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd

[@aerwin33]

shaymaar birouk so the father should be happy and willing to except visitation just because she is the mother. You are the problem. Family member has kids with a mother who is currently in a treatment facility and they would rather keep the kids IN THERE than place the kids with the dad. So, look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself the mom should always have the child. Because this is what you are putting kids through.

[@katestow8767]

@@aerwin33 if the father is in and out of jail and doing drugs, I don’t think that is a safe lifestyle for children

[@johnfall3655]

Have you ever heard of a writ of habeas corpus

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Yes, I have.

[@99fxgtjc]

Went into homes ?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Yep, part of the work.

[@elindigeno1215]

This woman thinks that leaving the kids alone is ok. I hope i win

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

El Indigeno, best of luck to you.

[@ihh245]

why do we have to win these battles as a father why can't you open your mouth and say the legal system sucks and they only create these battles to exist to make money. These legal professionals find an el dorado with these problems to make a living There should be natural rules for each parent to have equal time with children. I think you should say that these legal system are the real child abusers taking away child's right to connect with a loving parent sometimes for years while they make money

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

People can't get along so the system was set up.

[@mindfulmary]

I have a bad JUDGE.. Racist & sexiest

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am so sorry. That can make things difficult.

[@jackiea2470]

How do you win when you can’t afford a lawyer and the grandma has an expensive one …

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Jackie A, show up and be strong, showing that you are the mother your children need.

[@ocdraridrogonel]

The judge is just a referee, the judge is AUTOMATICALLY supposed to give 50/50 custody pursuant to the US CONSTITUTION. The reason there is so much conflict cause the judge is giving automatically giving one parent more parental access to the child than the other, if both parents have 50/50 then what ever the child does with each parent would be just that and there would be a limited amount of conflict between the parents because there would not be able to be argument on when the child is with each parent. The only conflict would be if one parent is showing abuse towards the child! The court system is a joke and bias towards one party as well HARMFUL and PREJUDICIAL!

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

There are problems with the court system. Until we get a better system in place it is what we have to work with.

[@adriandejesus4473]

I’m from California. Can 2 minors testify in court regarding father drinking and driving will there in his care during his watch? And in during his care they offered alcohol to them and there under minor? Can I take them to court ?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I don't give legal advice, you will have to ask an attorney. If there is a custody issue, you can talk to their guardian ad litem.

[@brittanycollins7408]

He's a private investigator and he helped me with my own custody battle

[@brittanycollins7408]

You can look him up on Instagram

[@brittanycollins7408]

JAY_ARNAULT

[@lkpeay]

This is a huge indictment on our Family “law” scheme. Your rights to the care, custody and control of YOUR children are ABSOLUTE. No state actor can come in and have sway, influence, power over YOUR parental decisions. The only legal determination is 50/50 custody. PERIOD. Parents SOLELY decide a child’s best interest

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

See my other video on my family court is not a good place to solve problems.

[@rickeyalyles9169]

Child custody is a scam. Only if people think of these things before bringing children in the world

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Rickeya lyles, thank you for commenting.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@seanlafferty3085]

I dont have kids, I just wanted to read depressing comments

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Sean, I hope you learned a few things that will help you with others you know who might be going through this trial.

[@shantehalsell6847]

Wow this shit is depressing I’m make a video when I get. My child back

[@UGnnaLearnToday.]

Title: Winning a custody battle… “I’m not giving legal advice I’m giving relationship advice.” 🤦

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thanks for watching.

[@ikhidegreat4797]

i can recommend you to a man who can help you with custody cases like he helped my son

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142(☉｡☉)!

[@ikhidegreat4797]

✛𝟮𝟯𝟰9025712142

[@ikhidegreat4797]

Wh'tsapp him for help

[@eponymoususer8923]

You say “there are resources”. Can you give a list of these resources? They’re abundant for moms- especially if they claim domestic violence. Where are the resources for dads?

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you.

[@proud2bamommy06]

Everything you talk about is parents whom were together. Whom got some sort of "bitter ness or some sort of qualm with the opposing" Can you go on a more regular subject such as, when a guy gets you pregnant on purpose and leaves for years - and is in and out throughout the years? Like a damn jack in the box daddy? Is that even possible or am I the only one who wants best for their child regardless if its communication with the other?? And can we quit the "win" shit because your "authentic" or "true" you claim is BS when you actually go into court. Be for the children not KZbin. People actually need the correct info for once. -- not bais options.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Sounds like this doesn't apply to you. Thanks for watching.

[@peterstewart6849]

Sick

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Good luck.

[@lovemachine6473]

This is bull. Mom gets the kids. Dad pays for the lawyers to go on holiday. Simple as that. The system is broken and always will be. Even if you can prove she is incompetent and your a good dad. CPS just takes em from both. It's all lies. I don't know how you people sleep at night. Hope you get a paper cut and it festers from sleeping in a bed full of money. Reaped from broken families tears!

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am sorry you have been hurt.

[@lovemachine6473]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV I don't want your crocodile tears!

[@lovemachine6473]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV yeah!! No answer! One day people will rise up against this. Hide in your ivory tower. For all the good it will do. All it will take is one Media outlet to speak the truth about this! Yes I know that there is messed up parents! And so does the system. Difference is!! I want to help. And all you and said organization wants to do is make bank! Prove me wrong!! I challenge you!!

[@Synthalog]

The best interest for the children is that the father pays for everything.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Synthalog, I am not sure about that. It depends on who has been earning money and who has been nurturing the children.

[@jamesbrayall2887]

Im 💯 % sure synthalog is correct. It people like you who denies the facts that the courts are one side it all ways !

[@shawnmoore1319]

Then the father should have full custody too

[@flashfire157]

I wonder if your opinions are similar to other custody evaluators. I certainly hope so cuz I'll be looking good when ours comes to visit. I'm incapable of NOT being a complete dork with my kids. Fart jokes and all

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Your sincerity will come through.

[@JoseNoSwag]

Men need to start winning more custody battles. Women these days abuse their kids and date shorty stepfathers. Men wake up. Be honest! Respectful! Also put the baby first!

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Thank you for watching.

[@Hidden-comment164]

This guy talked about a whole Lotta nothing in this video just don’t watch this video he gives you no tips at all

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

Try a different video, there are a few on the channel

[@Hidden-comment164]

@@LiveOnPurposeTV Your other videos are great this one just wasn’t on point

[@cindymunoz6327]

This is boring.

[@LiveOnPurposeTV]

I am sure you would like one of the other videos, give it a try.

[@BrownDracula]

Pretty useless 10 min video

[@tonystorcke]

The entire concept of a custody battle is a net negative for the children. The children belong with the father. Unless the father is just not able to take care of the children, the children should stay with the father. Women want to be free so they can try to find another man. If she has the children, her chances of finding another man are very slim. Call it what it is, a child support battle.